GOOD ADVICE

***FIVE TIPS TO HELP DEAL WITH YOUR EX SPOUSE, AND FOCUS ON THE KIDS, DURING THE HOLIDAYS ***

The holidays are here again, and for some parents that means divvying up time with the kids . . . and butting heads with the ex. If you have to share your kids for the holidays, here are five tips to help make sure things go as smoothly as possible . . .

#1.) ALWAYS PUT THE KIDS FIRST. The holidays should make your kids happy, not stressed out. So remember to stay focused on THEM. Mixing family drama with the holidays might seem like the norm, but it's never healthy for children.

#2.) HAVE A CONVERSATION. You won't look forward to it, but a phone call with your ex might be appropriate. If you'll be spending a lot of time picking up and dropping off the kids, then get organized NOW. You'll avoid a lot of problems down the line.

#3.) DON'T BADMOUTH EACH OTHER. It's okay to vent, but don't do it around the kids. It's not fair to them or your ex. Everything you say about each other will stay with them . . . and it might affect them more than you think.

#4.) PUT YOUR GRUDGES ON HOLD. Or at least try to. Even if you don't like the other person, you can still be polite. You're more in control if you take the high road, so don't bring up past mistakes if you know it'll just cause a fight.

#5.) RESPECT EACH OTHER'S TURF. If you go to different churches or have different holiday traditions, try to find a compromise. The holidays bring families closer together, so make sure that you AND your ex have a chance to bond with the kids. (Yahoo.com)