HOLLYWOOD DIRT OVERFLOW (07-21-10)
LINDSAY LOHAN LUNACY
LINDSAY LOHAN IS CAGED HEAT!!! BUT ONLY FOR 14 DAYS:
The drama is over . . . for now. LINDSAY LOHAN showed up at the courthouse yesterday morning, just like she was supposed to . . . and she is now behind bars, where many would say she belongs. (--For the record, Lindsay was EIGHT WHOLE MINUTES LATE. I know that's probably a big deal to some of you.) --But Lindsay won't serve her full, 90-day sentence. She won't even do the 23 days everyone's been predicting. Almost as soon as she was booked yesterday, her sentence was reduced to TWO WEEKS. --She's expected to get out on August 2nd. (--The judge issues the sentence, but it's up to the jail to decide how much of it the inmate serves. Sentences are typically slashed due to inmate overcrowding.) --As expected, Judge Marsha Revel ordered that all cameras be turned off before Lindsay was actually taken into custody. But a courtroom sketch artist captured the moment of Lindsay's cuffing quite nicely.
(--And here's video of Lindsay in the courtroom . . .)
http://www.tmz.com/videos?autoplay=true&mediaKey=88b28605-8c33-4e7e-a776-6f65cfe81c60
--Lindsay's dad, MICHAEL LOHAN, shouted, quote, "We love you, Lindsay!" as she was being taken away. She didn't acknowledge him. (--Lindsay was accompanied by her first attorney, Shawn Chapman Holley . . . who clarified to the judge that Robert Shapiro had never actually taken over the case -As we've said time and again, Lindsay's sentence is for 90 days . . . but she'll probably only serve about a quarter of her sentence, which is roughly three weeks, due to prison overcrowding. --She could also get time off for good behavior. --After her release, Lindsay will be required to enroll in a 90-day, inpatient rehab program.
--One last . . . and very AWESOME note: Somebody threw CONFETTI as Lindsay made her way to the courthouse. And there's video. (--Check it out . . .) http://www.tmz.com/videos?autoplay=true&mediaKey=d98900b4-dff3-4bee-9c5a-62f5716464d4
A BRIEF LOOK AT LINDSAY'S NEW LIVING CONDITIONS:
Whatever time Lindsay serves . . . whether it be 90 days, three weeks or less . . . she'll do so mainly in a 12-by-8-foot cell. --She won't be able to wear makeup or use the Internet . . . so if you live off Lindsay's deep, heartfelt Tweets, expect some withdrawals. --Speaking of withdrawals, Lindsay will NOT be able to smoke . . . which is going to be tough for her, since she's been known to burn two packs a day. She also won't be allowed to shower every day. --Lindsay will only get to leave her cell for about an hour a day, and she'll only be allowed visitors two days a week. --Oh, and upon entering the prison yesterday morning, Lindsay most likely had the privilege of a complete STRIP SEARCH, including a body cavity probe. --Other than that, though, it's not exactly breaking rocks on the chain gang. ABC legal analyst Dana Cole says, quote, "It's not going to be the worst situation imaginable, far from it. It's just going to be boring basically."
(--Check out a picture and video of Lindsay's new digs here . . .)
http://www.foxnews.com/entertainment/2010/07/20/jail-like-lohan/
DID ROBERT SHAPIRO USE LINDSAY LOHAN TO PUBLICIZE HIS SOBER LIVING HOUSE???
So-called "sources" say that LINDSAY LOHAN thinks Robert Shapiro just USED her to get some publicity for his sober living house. --Robert made Lindsay check into the place last week, and started acting like he was going to be her attorney. Then, on Monday night, he went to court and told the judge he was NOT taking the case. --The timing of Lindsay's move to the sober house was a little odd, since Lindsay had less than a week to go before she was supposed to start serving her jail sentence. --And remember . . . Shapiro said he had every intention of making Lindsay serve her jail time. So what, exactly, was the point of putting her in there? --If she really does have this "disease" of addiction, as he himself said, what was the point of making her take up a cot in the place for just a few days? Surely, he must know it wasn't going to actually do her any good. --On the other hand, a former prosecutor named Robin Sax thinks Shapiro bailed because Lindsay was too hard to handle. --She told "Good Morning America", quote, "He probably said, 'Listen, if you're not going to do it my way, you can go do it your way but you're going to twist in the winds alone.' --"It's not surprising that Robert Shapiro has had trouble holding Lindsay under control. That's been a big problem from my sources and what I hear."
THERE'S NEW MEL GIBSON AUDIO . . . IN WHICH MEL DOESN'T NECESSARILY DENY HE HIT HIS DAUGHTER:
Even more MEL GIBSON audio hit the web yesterday, and here's what people are talking about most: --There's a clip in which OKSANA GRIGORIEVA accuses Mel of hitting their daughter Lucia while she was holding her. And Mel DOESN'T DENY IT. --Instead, he replies, quote, "I want my child, and no one will believe you." --During that same exchange, Mel even rips on Alexander, Oksana's 12-year-old son with actor TIMOTHY DALTON. --He says, quote, "You need a (effing) kick up the ass for being a (B-word), (C-word), gold digging whore with a (rhymes with WUSSY) son!" --Here's another gem . . . quote, "I'm not giving you my house and you can rot unless you crawl back, (perform oral sex on me) and say you're sorry, in that order! Do you understand me? --"You (effing) offend my (effing) maleness, my masculinity, my being, my soul! And you call me a sinner? You're a (effing) moving violation!" --Oksana hangs up when he tells her that she's much better at performing oral sex than she is at music. (--Here's the audio. As usual, explicit language ahead.)
http://www.radaronline.com/exclusives/2010/07/exclusive-audio-tape-could-destroy-mel-no-one-will-believe-you-he-says-after-she
DID MEL GIBSON WANT TO KILL OKSANA . . . AND HIMSELF???
There's a new report going around that MEL GIBSON'S rage nearly reached a LETHAL level during one of his arguments with OKSANA GRIGORIEVA. --It was during the fight that allegedly turned physical back on January 6th. A so-called "source" says that after Mel hit Oksana in the mouth and on the temple, he choked her and held his hand over her mouth. --Then he pulled a gun out of his pocket, put it against her head and threatened to kill her, the children and himself. And Oksana's 12-year-old son supposedly saw it happen. --Meanwhile, Mel's attorney presented evidence to investigators yesterday that supposedly shows Oksana has FABRICATED evidence in an attempt to extort Mel. --TMZ claims the evidence includes texts that Oksana sent to Mel, telling him that she recorded their conversations because Mel wasn't supporting her. --Those texts, if they're real, could really screw Oksana. --See, it's illegal to record someone if they don't know they're being recorded. But there's an exception: If you're recording someone because you believe there's a threat of FELONY VIOLENCE, you're within your rights. --But if Mel has proof that Oksana only recorded him for bargaining purposes, then all that audio could be declared inadmissible as evidence. --So not only would she be in legal trouble for recording Mel, but it would be as if all the stuff she recorded didn't even exist.
CHECK OUT SOME HUMOROUS MEL GIBSON TAKE-OFFS:
Not surprisingly, a lot of people are putting together videos ripping on MEL GIBSON. Here are a few of them . . . --First, we have "Mel Says the Darndest Things", from "Jimmy Kimmel Live". Jimmy took a 7-year-old girl and had her repeat some of the insane stuff Mel said . . .
(--WARNING!!! This clip contains BLEEPED profanity from the mouth of a 7-year-old girl . . .)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5bZ7dyi3Ynw
--Then there's this HILARIOUS mash-up of the Mel Gibson rant and the CHRISTIAN BALE rant . . .
(--WARNING!!! This clip contains UNBLEEPED profanity. TONS of it . . .)
http://www.funnyordie.com/videos/7edde4a647/christian-bale-mel-gibson-phone-fight
(--Funny Or Die has a few other Mel Gibson vids. They'll play automatically after this one if you just stay on the site.)
BRITNEY SPEARS HAS MEL GIBSON'S BACK:
So far, the only celebrity who's had the guts to come forward and publicly stick up for MEL GIBSON is WHOOPI GOLDBERG. She actually said on "The View" that she doesn't think Mel is a racist. --But behind the scenes, Mel has another celebrity supporter: BRITNEY SPEARS. --"In Touch Weekly" says, quote, "Mel has been talking to her a lot, they speak on the phone. Mel was one of the only people who reached out to help Britney when she was at her lowest point, and she believes that demonstrates what a loving and wonderful man he is. --"She wants people to give him a second chance . . . just like he gave her one when everyone else turned away." (--As you may recall, Mel and his then-wife Robyn reached out to Britney back when she lost her mind and ended up in the hospital early in 2008. Then they took her on vacation with them in Costa Rica the following May.)
JENNIFER ANISTON GOT A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST A GUY WHO WAS CAUGHT WITH "A SHARP OBJECT AND DUCT TAPE":
JENNIFER ANISTON just got a restraining order against a 24-year-old guy who had been stalking her. And this dude sounds a little more dangerous than the average, obsessive freak. --His name is Jason Peyton, and he was arrested last week at, quote, "a location he believes [Aniston] frequents." --According to Jennifer's court papers, he had in his possession, quote, "a sharp object, a bag, a roll of duct tape and written messages about her." --Oh, and he also scraped the messages, "I Love Jennifer Aniston" and "I Love You Jennifer Aniston " onto his own car. --Peyton is actually from Pennsylvania, and he traveled all the way to L.A. to find Jennifer. His dad alerted the cops because he has a history of violence . . . such as stabbing himself and hitting his mom with a golf club. --He also believes he's related to Oprah, Nelson Mandela, Jay-Z, Jennifer Lopez, Courteney Cox, Bill Gates, the Bush family and Donald Trump --He's currently on involuntary psychiatric hold.
JESSE JAMES HAS WON CUSTODY OF HIS DAUGHTER:
JESSE JAMES was granted custody of his 6-year-old daughter Sunny yesterday . . . which clears the way for him to move to Austin, Texas to be closer to ex-wife SANDRA BULLOCK. --Jesse's ex-wife, tattooed mattress actress JANINE LINDEMULDER, had been trying to keep that from happening . . . obviously because it'll limit her time with her daughter unless she moves to Austin, too. --And it looks like she might. After the verdict, Janine broke down in court and repeatedly said, quote, "I'll move, I'll move." --Janine and Jesse actually have joint legal custody of Sunny, but Jesse has full physical custody. --The judge ruled that Janine will get as much time with Sunny as possible right up to the beginning of the school year in Austin. --Outside the courthouse, Janine said, quote, "I don't think Sandra's trying to steal her. I would just like a little more communication mom to mom that would be nice. Keep me in the loop."
GEENA DAVIS IS NOW A MEMBER OF THE SCHWARZENEGGER ADMINISTRATION:
GEENA DAVIS is now a part of the Schwarzenegger administration. --Governor Arnold has appointed her to the Commission on the Status of Women . . . a nonpartisan panel that advocates for women and girls on matters such as education and access to health care. --Geena . . . who's a Democrat . . . is the founder of the Geena Davis Institute on Gender in the Media . . . and also works with the United Nations Development Fund for Women. --And not that this actually means anything, but I suppose I should also mention that a few years ago, Geena starred on an ABC show called "Commander in Chief", in which she played the first female President of the United States.
JON VOIGHT WAS AT THE "SALT" PREMIERE:
It looks like ANGELINA JOLIE has finally patched things up with her dad, JON VOIGHT. --The premiere of Angelina's new movie, "Salt", was Monday night . . . and Jon was one of the guests. And he and Angelina were reportedly seen, quote, "hugging affectionately" at the after-party.
YOU KNOW YOU WANT A HOODIE WITH BETTY WHITE'S FACE ON IT!!!
The Year of BETTY WHITE continues. There's now a line of HOODIES with her face on them. (!!!) They also have machine-washable ear buds and an input jack for your music player. --This isn't a rip-off, either. These are licensed products, and proceeds are going to Betty's favorite charity, the Morris Animal Foundation. (--Get your official Betty White hoodie here . . .)
http://shop.hoodiebuddie.com/SearchResults.asp?Cat=103
J-WOWW FROM "JERSEY SHORE" WANTS TO MAKE OUT WITH MEGAN FOX:
This isn't a bad visual to get you over your hump day: JENNI "J-WOWW" FARLEY from "Jersey Shore" wants to make out with MEGAN FOX. --She says, quote, "Megan Fox gives me a tingle. I like her 'cause she knows she's hot and she's a (B-word) about it. I'd totally make out with her." (--Jenni's comments came from a "Maxim" interview. Not surprisingly, she shot some sexy pics for them, too. And they might give you a tingle. You can see those here . . .)
http://www.maxim.com/stuff/maxims-grooming-guide/93859/smokin-j-woww.html
WILL SARAH PALIN BOYCOTT BRISTOL AND LEVI'S WEDDING???
This probably WON'T happen, but it's fun to toy with the possibilities: There's word going around the World Wide Web of Gossip that SARAH PALIN will BOYCOTT her daughter BRISTOL'S wedding to LEVI JOHNSTON. --A so-called "Palin family friend" says, quote, "It's going to be the wedding of the century in Alaska. Our version of Princess Diana and Prince Charles' wedding. -"Everyone would kill to get an invite even if it means having to buy them an expensive gift. It's just too bad that her mother has refused to attend. Although I can't say I blame her after everything that boy has put her through." --A friend of Levi's adds, quote, "Bristol is very upset about her mother's decision and hopes her dad, Todd, will be able to change her mind . . . Bristol has told her mom she doesn't even want a wedding present just her mom to attend. --"[But] with or without Sarah, Todd will be walking his daughter down the aisle." (--There's no way Sarah would miss this wedding . . . or even act like she doesn't want to attend it. It just wouldn't be good for her image . . . and frankly, without image, what exactly does Sarah Palin have going for her???) (--If Sarah is really dead-set against this union, then my guess is that she's doing whatever she can BEHIND THE SCENES to stop it from happening.)
THREE FUN PICTURE GALLERIES TO WASTE YOUR TIME ON THIS MORNING:
Here are three fun picture galleries to waste your time on this morning:
#1.) First off, we have a nice collection of nude or nearly-nude "Rolling Stone" covers spanning several decades . . .
http://www.rollingstone.com/culture/photos/17382/96152
#2.) Next up, celebrities without makeup . . .
http://celebslam.celebuzz.com/2010/07/no-makeup-famous-celebrities.php?bfm_index=1
#3.) Last, but certainly not least, we have celebrities with gross veins sticking out of their bodies . . .
http://thechive.com/2010/07/20/yeah-those-veins-not-sexy-9-photos/
JENNA FISCHER AND HER NEW HUSBAND WERE MARRIED BY . . . JEFF PROBST . . . ???
Usually, when celebrities get married, nobody cares who performed the service. But that's because most of the time, it's not "Survivor" host JEFF PROBST. --Probst is an ordained minister and a longtime friend of JENNA FISCHER, who plays Pam on "The Office". And when Jenna married some writer named Lee Kirk earlier this month, it was Probst who officiated. --Jeff has been in Nicaragua filming the new season of "Survivor" . . . but he took a 24-hour leave to fly back to Malibu for the ceremony.
SHOULD JESSICA SIMPSON HAVE WORN THIS???
Let's get this straight: JESSICA SIMPSON is NOT FAT. She is, however, not petite, either. She's deliciously curvy and slightly candy-coated. --Yesterday, Jessica was photographed in an outfit that outlined that fact . . . and now there's all manner of debate over whether or not she should have worn it. (Check it out here: http://www.facebook.com/home.php?#!/1055jyy)
ALI LARTER IS INDEED PREGNANT:
It's true: "Resident Evil" minx ALI LARTER is pregnant. This will be the first child for her and husband HAYES MACARTHUR.
BILL MURRAY SAYS THE CHANCES FOR "GHOSTBUSTERS 3" HAVE "VAPORIZED" . . . BECAUSE THE MOVIE "YEAR ONE" WAS SO BAD?
BILL MURRAY has made it ABUNDANTLY CLEAR that he doesn't want anything to do with "Ghostbusters 3" . . . and it would take them driving a dump truck of money up to his house for him to even make a cameo. --In a new interview with "GQ" he went even further . . . and said that he doesn't think "Ghostbusters 3" is ever going to happen. --And here's his explanation . . . where he finds a way to blame things on that failed JACK BLACK / MICHAEL CERA comedy "Year One". --Quote, "['Ghostbusters 3'] is all a bunch of crock. It's a crock. HAROLD RAMIS said, 'Oh, I've got these guys, they write on 'The Office' and they're really funny. They're going to write the next 'Ghostbusters'. --"They had just written this movie he directed, ['Year One']. Well, I never went to see [it], but people who did, including other Ghostbusters, said it was one of the worst things they had ever seen in their lives. --"So that ['Ghostbusters 3'] dream just vaporized. That was gone." --As of right now, though, only Bill Murray seems to think "Ghostbusters 3" is dead . . . back in May, Ramis and DAN AYKROYD said it was definitely going to start shooting this fall, with or without Murray.
A REPORTER FINALLY ASKS M. NIGHT SHYAMALAN WHY HIS MOVIES KEEP GETTING WORSE AND WORSE:
Some people have been waiting to hear M. NIGHT SHYAMALAN answer this question since they saw "Signs". Some since "Lady in the Water". Some since "The Happening". And a few even held out through "The Last Airbender". --But a reporter at a press conference in Mexico finally asked Night THE question: Why do your movies keep getting worse and worse? And he answered it. --The reporter said, quote, "You had a very strong start of your career with 'The Sixth Sense' . . . however, the audience has lost its faith in your work. 'Airbender' feels like you want to captivate the audiences again by becoming more commercial. Am I right?" --And Night, after giving a few VERY incredulous looks, answered, quote, "I think if I thought like you, I'd kill myself. Everything you said is the opposite of my instinct as an artist. Your impression of my career is not my impression of my career. --"It's a fascinating thing that you would even characterize my whole career the way you just did, dismissively like that. It's sad. I'm not even sure how to respond to a statement like that. --"I've literally turned down more money in my life to do things because I just don't believe in [them]. I give up most of my salary to keep the sequel rights to my movies just so that they never get exploited. --"Ultimately, I think it's only time that will take that cynicism in your point of view and eradicate it. So I'll just try to make good movies as long as they let me make movies."
(--Here's a video of the question and answer, with more from Night . . .)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_C76QBg2p78
IF THE WRITERS FOR CONAN'S "TONIGHT SHOW" WIN AN AWARD DURING THE EMMY BROADCAST . . . IT *WON'T* BE TELEVISED:
When the Emmy nominations came out two weeks ago, the big news was that CONAN O'BRIEN'S cancelled "Tonight Show" got a nomination, while JAY LENO'S new "Tonight Show" didn't. And the Emmys are on NBC. --Yesterday, there was a rumor going around that the Emmy Powers That Be had decided NOT to include Conan's category in the TV broadcast. --Turns out that's true, but not entirely true. Conan's "Tonight Show" got two big nominations . . . one for Outstanding Variety, Music or Comedy Series, and one for Outstanding Writing in a Variety, Music or Comedy Series. --The WRITING award is the one that won't be shown on the main broadcast . . . it's been pushed into the Creative Arts Emmy ceremony, which takes place on Saturday, August 21st. The Emmys themselves air live on Sunday, August 29th. --The award for best overall variety, music or comedy series WILL still be part of NBC's Emmy broadcast. So if Conan wins . . . and right now, he's the odds-on favorite . . . he will get to accept his Emmy and give a speech live on the network that fired him. --The reason the Variety/Comedy/Music writers are bumped this year is because they were part of the main Emmys last year . . . and the directors were bumped. The TV Academy is alternating years between the two, to cut down the broadcast time. (--One big down side of the writers being bumped from the main ceremony is we won't get to see the hilarious videos they always make to air during the Emmys . . . here are the video montages from the writers from the past three years . . .)
http://www.nypost.com/p/blogs/popwrap/conan_brien_gets_screwed_again_ESqlB7byBW1bYi07Wv14pN
"JERSEY SHORE" STRIKE UPDATE: EVERYONE BUT ANGELINA IS BACK, AND NOW THEY'RE DENYING THAT THE STRIKE EVER HAPPENED:
Two days ago, the cast of "Jersey Shore" allegedly went on STRIKE . . . demanding raises before they film a third season. And, amazingly, MTV agreed that the cast members are underpaid for whatever it is that they do . . . and gave in. --According to the "Hollywood Reporter" and TMZ, all of the cast members have signed back on . . . except for possibly ANGELINA, who was kicked out of the house during the first season and is now the least-famous member of the cast. --The cast members were paid $10,000 per episode for season two and were allegedly demanding $30,000 per episode for season three. MTV reportedly offered them close to that amount, and season three will start shooting this week. --Now that everything's resolved, J-WOWW is denying that the strike ever happened. Quote, "None of it was true. Nobody ever talked about going on strike. Don't believe what you read."
TWO "EVERYBODY LOVES RAYMOND" CAST MEMBERS WILL REUNITE ON ABC'S "THE MIDDLE":
PATRICIA HEATON and DORIS ROBERTS . . . who both starred on "Everybody Loves Raymond" . . . are reuniting. Sort-of. Briefly. Next season, Doris will guest star on Patricia's sitcom on ABC, "The Middle". Doris will be playing a teacher who has Patricia's son in her class.
WEDNESDAY TV REMINDERS: (--Check your local listings.)
--"So You Think You Can Dance" [Performance Show] . . . 8:00 to 10:00 P.M. on Fox. (--The remaining six dancers perform for the show's 150th episode.)
--"Big Brother 12" [Power of Veto competition] . . . 8:00 to 9:00 P.M. on CBS.
--"America's Got Talent" [Results Show] . . . 9:00 to 10:00 P.M. on NBC. (--Four more acts will advance to the top 24.)
--"I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant" [3rd Season Finale] . . . 9:00 to 9:30 P.M. on TLC.
--"Billy the Exterminator" [2nd Season Finale] . . . 10:00 to 10:30 P.M. on A&E.
--"The Real World: New Orleans" . . . 10:00 to 11:00 P.M. on MTV.
--"Pros vs. Joes" [5th Season Premiere] . . . 10:00 to 11:00 P.M. on Spike TV. (--It's the NBA vs. the NFL when former basketball stars Kenny Smith, Rick Fox and Hakeem Olajuwon team up against football stars Terrell Owens, Donovan McNabb and Antonio Gates in a three-on-three basketball contest.)
CONCERT BUSINESS IS DOWN 15% FROM ONE YEAR AGO . . . AND CANCELLATIONS ARE HAPPENING ALL OVER THE PLACE:
Concerts are one of the few remaining ways for music acts to make big money. But that's meant that TONS of artists scheduled tours this year . . . and, with the economy still hurting, people can't afford to go see every artist they'd like to. --And, according to Pollstar, that shows. Right now, the concert business is down 15% from where it was last year. The top 100 tours grossed almost $200 MILLION less in the first six months of 2010 than they did in 2009. --And, all over the country, concerts are being cancelled and rescheduled because of poor ticket sales. --The top, top, top artists are doing OK. JUSTIN BIEBER, LADY GAGA and TAYLOR SWIFT are all selling tickets with no problem --But artists at the next level down . . . like RIHANNA, the JONAS BROTHERS or the gorgeous ladies of LILITH FAIR . . . are really struggling. They're the ones who are having to move to smaller venues or cancel shows outright. --Gary Bongiovanni is the editor-in-chief of Pollstar. He says, quote, "In this summer, we have way too many artists on tour . . . [more] than any market could support even in the best of economic times. --"Live music has a very bright future, but in a tough economic environment, people have to make hard choices."
DO KESHA AND RIHANNA REALLY BRAID EACH OTHER'S HAIR NAKED?
RIHANNA is struggling to sell tickets to her tour this summer, so here's a thought to increase ticket sales: FULL-FRONTAL NUDITY. KESHA is Rihanna's opening act for most dates, and she says they spend PLENTY of time naked BACK stage. --Quote, "We have slumber parties and pillow fights, and we braid each other's hair a lot. We talk about boys, naked." (--Yes, we know she was kidding. Probably. But we're going to pretend she was serious.)
GUNS N' ROSES ANNOUNCED ITS FIRST, AND POSSIBLY ONLY, U.S. TOUR STOP:
GUNS N' ROSES just announced the first, and possibly only, U.S. stop for its Chinese Democracy tour. And, yes, based on everything we know about G n' R there are overwhelming odds it's going to be cancelled . . . but just in case, here it is. --Guns n' Roses will be performing on August 13th in Sturgis, South Dakota, at the Rock n' Rev Festival that's part of the huge Sturgis Motorcycle Rally. --G n' R's Chinese Democracy tour has gone all over the world, but didn't have any U.S. dates planned . . . because the album "Chinese Democracy" did so poorly here.
IF ANYONE MAKES A MOVIE ABOUT OBAMA, DRAKE WANTS TO PLAY HIM:
Before DRAKE was making records, he was a child actor on the Canadian show "Degrassi: The Next Generation". And he wants to dust off his old acting skills for a role he thinks he'd be perfect for: PRESIDENT OBAMA. --Drake said, quote, "I hope somebody makes a movie about Obama's life soon because I could play him. That's my goal. Anytime I see him on TV, I don't change the channel, I pay attention and listen to the inflections of his voice."
ICE CUBE AND YOUNG JEEZY HAVE BOTH ANNOUNCED NEW ALBUM RELEASE DATES:
ICE CUBE'S album "I Am The West" was supposed to come out last Tuesday, but that clearly didn't happen. And now he's announced a new drop date: September 28th. He didn't give a reason for the delay. --YOUNG JEEZY also announced a release date for his new album, "TM103". It's going to drop on September 28th . . . which is his 33rd birthday.
SNOOP SAYS ONE OF THE THINGS THAT SAVED HIS MARRIAGE WAS . . . HIS DAUGHTER GETTING LUPUS:
I think this is the classic definition of finding a silver lining. When SNOOP DOGG'S daughter Cori got LUPUS at age six, it was obviously horrific and terrible . . . but, according to Snoop, in retrospect it also SAVED HIS MARRIAGE. --Snoop says, quote, "I was caught up with Hollywood, and the girls and the night life. I thought I was the man and I was willing to give up what I had at home for that." He even filed for divorce from his wife, Shante. --But then, when Cori got lupus, quote, "I felt helpless. No power, no friends." The disease brought him and Shanti closer . . . and they ended up reconciling and calling off the divorce. --Cori's lupus is currently in remission and she's living as a healthy teenager.
TAYLOR SWIFT'S NEXT ALBUM IS COMING OUT IN OCTOBER . . . AND ONE OF THE SONGS TALKS ABOUT HER FEAR OF COMMITMENT:
You probably had more important things to do yesterday than to sit through TAYLOR SWIFT'S live Webcast. And unless you're a rabid fan, you didn't miss a whole lot. She said her next album is titled "Speak Now" . . . and it drops October 25th. --And she's quite proud that she wrote it entirely on her own. She said, quote, "I didn't have any co-writers. I'd get my best ideas at 3:00 A.M., so I would just finish (the song). The songs that made the cut were the ones I wrote myself." --For me, the most interesting moment was when she described the album's first single, a song called "Mine", which is due out sometime next month. Taylor basically admitted she has a fear commitment, and that's why she can't hang onto a boyfriend. --She said, quote, "It's a song that is about my tendency to run from love. I think it's because that, for me, every really direct example of love I've had in front of me has ended in goodbye, has ended in breakups. --"I've developed this pattern of running away when it comes time to fall in love and to stay in a relationship. The song is sort of about finding the exception to that and finding someone who would make you believe in love and realize that it could work out."
(--If you'd like to hear more, you can check out the Webcast below. For some reason, the timer starts at the 4:12 mark . . .)
http://www.ustream.tv/taylorswift
NAZZY’S RANDOM STUFF
ONE OUT OF THREE MEN DON'T FEEL SAFE WHEN THEIR WIFE OR GIRLFRIEND IS DRIVING:
According to a shocking new survey by an online market research company called OnePoll.com . . . men think that they're better drivers than their wives and girlfriends -Of the 3,000 men surveyed, one in three felt, quote, "frightened" when their wife or girlfriend was driving. --And one in five men said they were NEVER able to relax when their wife or girlfriend was driving. --And overall, one in ten men said that they had actually been "forced" to grab the steering wheel because their wife or girlfriend had taken her eyes off the road, and was drifting towards the opposite lane. --And the same number . . . one in ten . . . have felt it was necessary to ask their wife or girlfriend to pull over, so that they could take over. --A spokesman for OnePoll.com said, quote, "[Men] believe they concentrate a lot better, read road situations more quickly and clearly, and have better reactions." --Not surprisingly, the study also found that one in five couples have argued about the other one's driving. (Telegraph)
HERE ARE THE TOP TEN COMPLAINTS MEN HAVE ABOUT WOMEN'S DRIVING:
So it's simple: Men are better drivers than women. Right guys? At least, we THINK we are. That's according to the results of a survey by OnePoll.com . . . which surveyed 3,000 MEN about the subject.
--Here are the Top Ten Complaints Men Have About Women's Driving.
#1.) Lack of concentration. This was the biggest complaint men had: They think that women are distracted too easily by children, scenery, or other drivers.
#2.) Braking too late. Ladies, you know when your guy is worried about this one. It's when he's pushing his foot down into the floormat and pressing against an imaginary brake.
#3.) Tapping the accelerator. In other words, hitting the accelerator inconsistently, which gives the ride a stop-and-start feel.
#4.) Drifting toward the shoulder. Guys don't like it when you let the car drift from side to side in a lane, instead of keeping it in a straight line. Especially if you drift all the way over to the side of the road, and hit those ridges on the shoulder.
#5.) Getting too close to other cars before passing them.
#6.) Braking too hard.
#7.) Fiddling with the stereo.
#8.) Failure to indicate.
#9.) Going too fast.
#10.) Staying in the middle lane / Not trying to pass.
(Telegraph)
A CITY IN FLORIDA SAYS "LADIES' NIGHT" VIOLATES AN ANTI-DISCRIMINATION ORDINANCE . . . SO BARS ARE HAVING "SHAVED LEGS NIGHT" INSTEAD:
You know what "Ladies' Night" means, right? That's when bars and clubs do drink specials for the ladies, or let them drink for free, or waive the cover fee . . . basically, whatever it takes to pack the women in and dilute the sea-of-sausage. -But now that's considered a violation of an anti-discrimination ordinance in Gainesville, Florida. (???) (--Gainesville's in the north-central part of Florida, and home to the University of Florida.) --In fact, a few months ago, the city sent official letters to all 155 of the city's booze-serving locations, and warned them about it. --But everyone knows that a proper ratio of male-to-female genitalia is ESSENTIAL for a successful hook-up scene. So to keep the meat market thing humming along, the bars in Gainesville have just had to get around the ordinance, and get creative. --For example, at a place called the Rue Bar, Friday isn't "Ladies' Night" anymore . . . it's "High Heels" night. And at a place called the Grog House, since they can't call Wednesday nights "Ladies' Night" . . . they call it "Shaved Legs" night. --Obviously there's a loophole here, and yes, dudes CAN drink for free if they're man enough to show up with shaved legs or high heels. According to the Grog House, at least five guys have shown up with shaved legs so far. (Sun Sentinel/ Gainesville Sun)
A COP IN BOSTON HAD TO RESIGN AFTER LEAVING HIS PATROL TO SEE BRIDGET THE MIDGET AT A STRIP CLUB:
28-year-old Richard P. Bennett is one of Massachusetts's finest. Or rather, he WAS one of Massachusetts's finest . . . right up until he went to a strip club while on duty to meet a midget porno star. Here's what happened. --Richard was a cop in Stoughton (--It's pronounced Stoe-tun, and it's about half an hour south of Boston). Last month he was on patrol, keeping the peace and insuring the public safety, when he learned some delightful news . . .--29-year-old Bridget Powers . . . a.k.a. "Bridget the Midget" . . . was set to appear at a local gentleman's club called Alex's. Bridget's a 3-foot-9-inch-tall porno star, and like other adult film skanks, she hits the strip club circuit from time to time. --According to Stoughton Police Chief Paul Shastany, quote, "[Officer Bennett] went there and left his beat and wanted to meet this person." (--Who you calling "this person"?! It's "this LITTLE person.") --Richard only took a quick look inside . . . we're not sure if he ever actually met Bridget the Midget . . . but unfortunately for him, five of his fellow officers ratted him out. And he knew he'd get fired for it, so he resigned. --According to Officer Bennett, quote, "A part of me wants to say, 'Where was the news when I pulled someone out of a burning car last year?' You know all the good things you do, and I'm going to be remembered for one stupid decision. It just sucks."
(Boston Herald)
"PLAYBOY" LAUNCHES A 'SAFE FOR WORK' SITE:
If you're one of the people who still reads "Playboy" . . . and I mean, one of the people who still looks at "Playboy" at ALL . . . I have some good news for you this morning. --Yesterday, "Playboy" launched a website called TheSmokingJacket.com, and it's 'Safe For Work.' As opposed to websites that are Not Safe For Work . . . or NSFW . . . meaning the ones that have all the really good stuff. --Obviously, the 'Smoking Jacket' part is a reference to the trademark jacket HUGH HEFNER supposedly wears when he's lounging around the Playboy Mansion. As for the content of the site . . . no nudity, obviously. --But it's got articles, and plenty of them. It's basically "Ask Men" or "Maxim" type stuff, like "How to Get Laid at Work", or "Seven Signs That You've given Up on Getting Laid." --Playboy Enterprises is billing it as a, quote, "new safe-for-work men's entertainment destination, that provides guys with smart and sexy distractions throughout the day." (ABC)
NINE THINGS YOUR KIDS DON'T NEED:
There's a website called WalletPop, and they recently put up a list of nine things your kids don't REALLY need. The idea is that parents are being suckered into buying overpriced junk, and that kids wouldn't notice a thing if you passed on this stuff.
--But what else is new? You could say that about pretty much every child's toy since the invention of "playing outside." Anyway, here's the list:
#9.) Early reading kits for babies. These are those DVD and flashcard kits that some parents feel pressured to buy, so their kids will be the very FIRST to read. But just read them books and skip the pseudo-science.
#8.) Silly Bandz. These are those rubber bands shaped like animals and dinosaurs and stuff. They turn into bracelets, then go back to their original shape when you take them off. But they're all the rage, so good luck refusing your kids this one.
#7.) Designer Diapers. Huggies has ones that look like jeans, and Pampers has other variations. But they cost about 60% more than regular diapers. Oh, and they're ridiculous.
#6.) High Heels For Little Girls. The backlash on this one's already going strong, so let's hope it's officially dead.
#5.) Manicures, Pedicures, and Spa Treatments. I'm not sure anyone really does this, other than celebrity kids or super-pampered rich kids. Either way it's lame.
#4.) Yoga. Does this one really even need to be explained? (--Look, stretching's fine . . . but it should be followed by a hearty game of grab-ass.)
#3.) Organic Bedding. If you want to start your kids on organic FOOD, or the vegetarian thing, go ahead. But organic bedding is just a way to over-sell do-gooder parents who have money to burn. Twin sets go for $295, and a crib set's $380.
#2.) Diaper Wipe Warmers.
#1.) 3D Movies. If you ask me, this one should be banned for ALL of us. Unless, like "Avatar", it was FILMED that way. But now they're tacking on crappy 3D effects to EVERY movie . . . and usually it doesn't justify the higher ticket price. (WalletPop)
NAZZY’S SILLY VIDEOS OF THE DAY
#1.) A BUNCH OF RUSSIANS TOOK A DONKEY PARASAILING:
A bunch of idiots in southern Russia made a donkey go parasailing, and now police have launched an animal cruelty investigation. There's cell phone video of it on the Internet, and it's really poor quality. But it does appear to be a donkey . . . parasailing.
(--Search for "donkey parasailing video." It takes off at :28.)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hEep5BrexT0
#2.) A PITCHER GOT HIT IN THE HEAD WITH A LINE DRIVE:
On Monday, a pitcher for the Texas Rangers named DUSTIN NIPPERT got hit in the head by a line drive, and I mean HARD. Nippert immediately dropped to the ground . . . as you'd expect. But he was okay. --Yesterday, the Rangers put him on the 15-day disabled list as a precaution. (--Search for "Dustin Nippert head video MLB.com." You have to watch a short ad before it starts. He gets hit at :06, and there's a replay at :41.)
http://mlb.mlb.com/video/play.jsp?content_id=10061067
#3.) HERE'S A THOROUGH DISCUSSION ABOUT ALL THE REASONS "BACK TO THE FUTURE" IS SICK, TWISTED, AND INSANE:
Cracked.com has a great video of four people talking about the movie "Back To The Future" and laying out all the reasons it's sick, twisted, and insane . . . and they're RIGHT. (--Search for "Cracked.com Back To The Future secretly horrifying." You have to watch a 30-second ad before it starts.)
http://www.cracked.com/vid6eo_18203_why-back-to-future-secretly-horrifying.html
THE SIX MOST SURPRISING WAYS ALCOHOL IS GOOD FOR YOU:
Everyone knows that a glass of wine a day is good for your heart. But the website Cracked.com put together a list of the six most SURPRISING ways alcohol is good for you. Here's the list . . .
#1.) ALOCHOL CAN HELP YOU LOSE WEIGHT. In a study of 37,000 people, the ones who had a few drinks a week were thinner than people who didn't drink at all. Not surprisingly, BINGE drinkers were the chubbiest.
#2.) ALCOHOL IS AN ANTIDOTE. The ingredient in antifreeze that makes it work is called ethylene glycol (--pronounced eth-a-leen GLY-call. And it's EXTREMELY poisonous.
--If you drink it, symptoms include vomiting, diarrhea, paranoia, dementia, and hallucinations. And eventually, it forms little, needle-shaped crystals inside your body that shred your kidneys and kill you.
--But if you call Poison Control, they'll tell you to drink a few shots of vodka, THEN go to the hospital.
--Here's why: Your body digests ethanol quickly, and vodka is basically just ethanol and water. So if you drink enough vodka, you should be able to pass the ethylene glycol in your urine before it crystallizes and kills you.
--The method is so reliable, it's used in hospitals all over the world.
#3.) ALCOHOL IMPROVES YOUR LIBIDO. But only if you drink a little. Studies have shown that men who drink in moderation are 20 to 30 percent less likely to have problems with erectile dysfunction.
#3.) ALCOHOL MAKES YOU SMARTER. In a study that was published in the "British Medical Journal," people who had 30 drinks per week performed better on logic and reasoning tests than people who drank very little or didn't drink at all.
--And they even scored better on short-term MEMORY tests.
#5.) ALCOHOL HELPS IF YOU TAKE A SHOT TO THE HEAD. Researchers studied almost 40,000 cases of people with head injuries. And patients had less swelling in their brains if they were DRUNK when the injury occurred.
--The reason alcohol keeps your brain from swelling is because it's an anti-inflammatory, like ibuprofen.
#6.) ALCOHOL CAN SAVE YOUR LIFE. When you fall down, your body usually tenses up and braces for impact.
--But when you're drunk, your central nervous system is basically numb, so your body stays relaxed, and not as much of the force is transferred to your bones and vital organs.
--Here's an example, but don't try this at home: A Russian guy drank THREE BOTTLES OF VODKA, then jumped out of his kitchen window. He fell FIVE STORIES, then he got up, walked upstairs, and jumped AGAIN.
--And he survived with just a few cuts and bruises.
(Cracked.com)
SITE FOR SORE EYES:
www.IWriteLike.com
This new website claims it can find your inner author. The recently launched I Write Like has one simple gimmick: You paste a few paragraphs that exemplify your writing, then click “analyze” and you get a badge telling you that you write like Stephen King or Ernest Hemingway, among others.
UNDERPANTS SURVEY
As Freshpair gears up to celebrate the eighth annual National Underwear Day in August, the company has released some surprising facts about underpants:
· 80% of Americans never change the style of their underwear once they become an adult – and 60% of those don’t even wear underwear that fits!
· 24% of American men say they have a “lucky” pair of underwear.
· 40% of men prefer briefs, while 10% opt for boxers, leaving the rest either in trunks, boxers briefs, thongs, or commando.
· As far as women, 34% match their bras to their panties.
For the first two weeks of August, Freshpair.com is giving away 5,000 pairs of free underwear.
AMERICA’S TAKEOUT HABITS
Friday night is the most popular night for Americans to order takeout, according to a new survey by Turning Leaf wine. Here’s the dish on the survey results:
· 34% of respondents have passed off takeout food as something they have made from scratch.
· When asked where they prefer to eat a takeout meal, it was a 50/50 split between cozying up on the living room couch and sitting down at the dining room table.
· 61% of Americans have stolen a bite of food before bringing it home.
· 41% of Americans chose Chinese as their all-time favorite takeout cuisine, with Italian coming in second (21%).
LINDSAY LOHAN IS CAGED HEAT!!! BUT ONLY FOR 14 DAYS:
The drama is over . . . for now. LINDSAY LOHAN showed up at the courthouse yesterday morning, just like she was supposed to . . . and she is now behind bars, where many would say she belongs. (--For the record, Lindsay was EIGHT WHOLE MINUTES LATE. I know that's probably a big deal to some of you.) --But Lindsay won't serve her full, 90-day sentence. She won't even do the 23 days everyone's been predicting. Almost as soon as she was booked yesterday, her sentence was reduced to TWO WEEKS. --She's expected to get out on August 2nd. (--The judge issues the sentence, but it's up to the jail to decide how much of it the inmate serves. Sentences are typically slashed due to inmate overcrowding.) --As expected, Judge Marsha Revel ordered that all cameras be turned off before Lindsay was actually taken into custody. But a courtroom sketch artist captured the moment of Lindsay's cuffing quite nicely.
(--And here's video of Lindsay in the courtroom . . .)
http://www.tmz.com/videos?autoplay=true&mediaKey=88b28605-8c33-4e7e-a776-6f65cfe81c60
--Lindsay's dad, MICHAEL LOHAN, shouted, quote, "We love you, Lindsay!" as she was being taken away. She didn't acknowledge him. (--Lindsay was accompanied by her first attorney, Shawn Chapman Holley . . . who clarified to the judge that Robert Shapiro had never actually taken over the case -As we've said time and again, Lindsay's sentence is for 90 days . . . but she'll probably only serve about a quarter of her sentence, which is roughly three weeks, due to prison overcrowding. --She could also get time off for good behavior. --After her release, Lindsay will be required to enroll in a 90-day, inpatient rehab program.
--One last . . . and very AWESOME note: Somebody threw CONFETTI as Lindsay made her way to the courthouse. And there's video. (--Check it out . . .) http://www.tmz.com/videos?autoplay=true&mediaKey=d98900b4-dff3-4bee-9c5a-62f5716464d4
A BRIEF LOOK AT LINDSAY'S NEW LIVING CONDITIONS:
Whatever time Lindsay serves . . . whether it be 90 days, three weeks or less . . . she'll do so mainly in a 12-by-8-foot cell. --She won't be able to wear makeup or use the Internet . . . so if you live off Lindsay's deep, heartfelt Tweets, expect some withdrawals. --Speaking of withdrawals, Lindsay will NOT be able to smoke . . . which is going to be tough for her, since she's been known to burn two packs a day. She also won't be allowed to shower every day. --Lindsay will only get to leave her cell for about an hour a day, and she'll only be allowed visitors two days a week. --Oh, and upon entering the prison yesterday morning, Lindsay most likely had the privilege of a complete STRIP SEARCH, including a body cavity probe. --Other than that, though, it's not exactly breaking rocks on the chain gang. ABC legal analyst Dana Cole says, quote, "It's not going to be the worst situation imaginable, far from it. It's just going to be boring basically."
(--Check out a picture and video of Lindsay's new digs here . . .)
http://www.foxnews.com/entertainment/2010/07/20/jail-like-lohan/
DID ROBERT SHAPIRO USE LINDSAY LOHAN TO PUBLICIZE HIS SOBER LIVING HOUSE???
So-called "sources" say that LINDSAY LOHAN thinks Robert Shapiro just USED her to get some publicity for his sober living house. --Robert made Lindsay check into the place last week, and started acting like he was going to be her attorney. Then, on Monday night, he went to court and told the judge he was NOT taking the case. --The timing of Lindsay's move to the sober house was a little odd, since Lindsay had less than a week to go before she was supposed to start serving her jail sentence. --And remember . . . Shapiro said he had every intention of making Lindsay serve her jail time. So what, exactly, was the point of putting her in there? --If she really does have this "disease" of addiction, as he himself said, what was the point of making her take up a cot in the place for just a few days? Surely, he must know it wasn't going to actually do her any good. --On the other hand, a former prosecutor named Robin Sax thinks Shapiro bailed because Lindsay was too hard to handle. --She told "Good Morning America", quote, "He probably said, 'Listen, if you're not going to do it my way, you can go do it your way but you're going to twist in the winds alone.' --"It's not surprising that Robert Shapiro has had trouble holding Lindsay under control. That's been a big problem from my sources and what I hear."
THERE'S NEW MEL GIBSON AUDIO . . . IN WHICH MEL DOESN'T NECESSARILY DENY HE HIT HIS DAUGHTER:
Even more MEL GIBSON audio hit the web yesterday, and here's what people are talking about most: --There's a clip in which OKSANA GRIGORIEVA accuses Mel of hitting their daughter Lucia while she was holding her. And Mel DOESN'T DENY IT. --Instead, he replies, quote, "I want my child, and no one will believe you." --During that same exchange, Mel even rips on Alexander, Oksana's 12-year-old son with actor TIMOTHY DALTON. --He says, quote, "You need a (effing) kick up the ass for being a (B-word), (C-word), gold digging whore with a (rhymes with WUSSY) son!" --Here's another gem . . . quote, "I'm not giving you my house and you can rot unless you crawl back, (perform oral sex on me) and say you're sorry, in that order! Do you understand me? --"You (effing) offend my (effing) maleness, my masculinity, my being, my soul! And you call me a sinner? You're a (effing) moving violation!" --Oksana hangs up when he tells her that she's much better at performing oral sex than she is at music. (--Here's the audio. As usual, explicit language ahead.)
http://www.radaronline.com/exclusives/2010/07/exclusive-audio-tape-could-destroy-mel-no-one-will-believe-you-he-says-after-she
DID MEL GIBSON WANT TO KILL OKSANA . . . AND HIMSELF???
There's a new report going around that MEL GIBSON'S rage nearly reached a LETHAL level during one of his arguments with OKSANA GRIGORIEVA. --It was during the fight that allegedly turned physical back on January 6th. A so-called "source" says that after Mel hit Oksana in the mouth and on the temple, he choked her and held his hand over her mouth. --Then he pulled a gun out of his pocket, put it against her head and threatened to kill her, the children and himself. And Oksana's 12-year-old son supposedly saw it happen. --Meanwhile, Mel's attorney presented evidence to investigators yesterday that supposedly shows Oksana has FABRICATED evidence in an attempt to extort Mel. --TMZ claims the evidence includes texts that Oksana sent to Mel, telling him that she recorded their conversations because Mel wasn't supporting her. --Those texts, if they're real, could really screw Oksana. --See, it's illegal to record someone if they don't know they're being recorded. But there's an exception: If you're recording someone because you believe there's a threat of FELONY VIOLENCE, you're within your rights. --But if Mel has proof that Oksana only recorded him for bargaining purposes, then all that audio could be declared inadmissible as evidence. --So not only would she be in legal trouble for recording Mel, but it would be as if all the stuff she recorded didn't even exist.
CHECK OUT SOME HUMOROUS MEL GIBSON TAKE-OFFS:
Not surprisingly, a lot of people are putting together videos ripping on MEL GIBSON. Here are a few of them . . . --First, we have "Mel Says the Darndest Things", from "Jimmy Kimmel Live". Jimmy took a 7-year-old girl and had her repeat some of the insane stuff Mel said . . .
(--WARNING!!! This clip contains BLEEPED profanity from the mouth of a 7-year-old girl . . .)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5bZ7dyi3Ynw
--Then there's this HILARIOUS mash-up of the Mel Gibson rant and the CHRISTIAN BALE rant . . .
(--WARNING!!! This clip contains UNBLEEPED profanity. TONS of it . . .)
http://www.funnyordie.com/videos/7edde4a647/christian-bale-mel-gibson-phone-fight
(--Funny Or Die has a few other Mel Gibson vids. They'll play automatically after this one if you just stay on the site.)
BRITNEY SPEARS HAS MEL GIBSON'S BACK:
So far, the only celebrity who's had the guts to come forward and publicly stick up for MEL GIBSON is WHOOPI GOLDBERG. She actually said on "The View" that she doesn't think Mel is a racist. --But behind the scenes, Mel has another celebrity supporter: BRITNEY SPEARS. --"In Touch Weekly" says, quote, "Mel has been talking to her a lot, they speak on the phone. Mel was one of the only people who reached out to help Britney when she was at her lowest point, and she believes that demonstrates what a loving and wonderful man he is. --"She wants people to give him a second chance . . . just like he gave her one when everyone else turned away." (--As you may recall, Mel and his then-wife Robyn reached out to Britney back when she lost her mind and ended up in the hospital early in 2008. Then they took her on vacation with them in Costa Rica the following May.)
JENNIFER ANISTON GOT A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST A GUY WHO WAS CAUGHT WITH "A SHARP OBJECT AND DUCT TAPE":
JENNIFER ANISTON just got a restraining order against a 24-year-old guy who had been stalking her. And this dude sounds a little more dangerous than the average, obsessive freak. --His name is Jason Peyton, and he was arrested last week at, quote, "a location he believes [Aniston] frequents." --According to Jennifer's court papers, he had in his possession, quote, "a sharp object, a bag, a roll of duct tape and written messages about her." --Oh, and he also scraped the messages, "I Love Jennifer Aniston" and "I Love You Jennifer Aniston " onto his own car. --Peyton is actually from Pennsylvania, and he traveled all the way to L.A. to find Jennifer. His dad alerted the cops because he has a history of violence . . . such as stabbing himself and hitting his mom with a golf club. --He also believes he's related to Oprah, Nelson Mandela, Jay-Z, Jennifer Lopez, Courteney Cox, Bill Gates, the Bush family and Donald Trump --He's currently on involuntary psychiatric hold.
JESSE JAMES HAS WON CUSTODY OF HIS DAUGHTER:
JESSE JAMES was granted custody of his 6-year-old daughter Sunny yesterday . . . which clears the way for him to move to Austin, Texas to be closer to ex-wife SANDRA BULLOCK. --Jesse's ex-wife, tattooed mattress actress JANINE LINDEMULDER, had been trying to keep that from happening . . . obviously because it'll limit her time with her daughter unless she moves to Austin, too. --And it looks like she might. After the verdict, Janine broke down in court and repeatedly said, quote, "I'll move, I'll move." --Janine and Jesse actually have joint legal custody of Sunny, but Jesse has full physical custody. --The judge ruled that Janine will get as much time with Sunny as possible right up to the beginning of the school year in Austin. --Outside the courthouse, Janine said, quote, "I don't think Sandra's trying to steal her. I would just like a little more communication mom to mom that would be nice. Keep me in the loop."
GEENA DAVIS IS NOW A MEMBER OF THE SCHWARZENEGGER ADMINISTRATION:
GEENA DAVIS is now a part of the Schwarzenegger administration. --Governor Arnold has appointed her to the Commission on the Status of Women . . . a nonpartisan panel that advocates for women and girls on matters such as education and access to health care. --Geena . . . who's a Democrat . . . is the founder of the Geena Davis Institute on Gender in the Media . . . and also works with the United Nations Development Fund for Women. --And not that this actually means anything, but I suppose I should also mention that a few years ago, Geena starred on an ABC show called "Commander in Chief", in which she played the first female President of the United States.
JON VOIGHT WAS AT THE "SALT" PREMIERE:
It looks like ANGELINA JOLIE has finally patched things up with her dad, JON VOIGHT. --The premiere of Angelina's new movie, "Salt", was Monday night . . . and Jon was one of the guests. And he and Angelina were reportedly seen, quote, "hugging affectionately" at the after-party.
YOU KNOW YOU WANT A HOODIE WITH BETTY WHITE'S FACE ON IT!!!
The Year of BETTY WHITE continues. There's now a line of HOODIES with her face on them. (!!!) They also have machine-washable ear buds and an input jack for your music player. --This isn't a rip-off, either. These are licensed products, and proceeds are going to Betty's favorite charity, the Morris Animal Foundation. (--Get your official Betty White hoodie here . . .)
http://shop.hoodiebuddie.com/SearchResults.asp?Cat=103
J-WOWW FROM "JERSEY SHORE" WANTS TO MAKE OUT WITH MEGAN FOX:
This isn't a bad visual to get you over your hump day: JENNI "J-WOWW" FARLEY from "Jersey Shore" wants to make out with MEGAN FOX. --She says, quote, "Megan Fox gives me a tingle. I like her 'cause she knows she's hot and she's a (B-word) about it. I'd totally make out with her." (--Jenni's comments came from a "Maxim" interview. Not surprisingly, she shot some sexy pics for them, too. And they might give you a tingle. You can see those here . . .)
http://www.maxim.com/stuff/maxims-grooming-guide/93859/smokin-j-woww.html
WILL SARAH PALIN BOYCOTT BRISTOL AND LEVI'S WEDDING???
This probably WON'T happen, but it's fun to toy with the possibilities: There's word going around the World Wide Web of Gossip that SARAH PALIN will BOYCOTT her daughter BRISTOL'S wedding to LEVI JOHNSTON. --A so-called "Palin family friend" says, quote, "It's going to be the wedding of the century in Alaska. Our version of Princess Diana and Prince Charles' wedding. -"Everyone would kill to get an invite even if it means having to buy them an expensive gift. It's just too bad that her mother has refused to attend. Although I can't say I blame her after everything that boy has put her through." --A friend of Levi's adds, quote, "Bristol is very upset about her mother's decision and hopes her dad, Todd, will be able to change her mind . . . Bristol has told her mom she doesn't even want a wedding present just her mom to attend. --"[But] with or without Sarah, Todd will be walking his daughter down the aisle." (--There's no way Sarah would miss this wedding . . . or even act like she doesn't want to attend it. It just wouldn't be good for her image . . . and frankly, without image, what exactly does Sarah Palin have going for her???) (--If Sarah is really dead-set against this union, then my guess is that she's doing whatever she can BEHIND THE SCENES to stop it from happening.)
THREE FUN PICTURE GALLERIES TO WASTE YOUR TIME ON THIS MORNING:
Here are three fun picture galleries to waste your time on this morning:
#1.) First off, we have a nice collection of nude or nearly-nude "Rolling Stone" covers spanning several decades . . .
http://www.rollingstone.com/culture/photos/17382/96152
#2.) Next up, celebrities without makeup . . .
http://celebslam.celebuzz.com/2010/07/no-makeup-famous-celebrities.php?bfm_index=1
#3.) Last, but certainly not least, we have celebrities with gross veins sticking out of their bodies . . .
http://thechive.com/2010/07/20/yeah-those-veins-not-sexy-9-photos/
JENNA FISCHER AND HER NEW HUSBAND WERE MARRIED BY . . . JEFF PROBST . . . ???
Usually, when celebrities get married, nobody cares who performed the service. But that's because most of the time, it's not "Survivor" host JEFF PROBST. --Probst is an ordained minister and a longtime friend of JENNA FISCHER, who plays Pam on "The Office". And when Jenna married some writer named Lee Kirk earlier this month, it was Probst who officiated. --Jeff has been in Nicaragua filming the new season of "Survivor" . . . but he took a 24-hour leave to fly back to Malibu for the ceremony.
SHOULD JESSICA SIMPSON HAVE WORN THIS???
Let's get this straight: JESSICA SIMPSON is NOT FAT. She is, however, not petite, either. She's deliciously curvy and slightly candy-coated. --Yesterday, Jessica was photographed in an outfit that outlined that fact . . . and now there's all manner of debate over whether or not she should have worn it. (Check it out here: http://www.facebook.com/home.php?#!/1055jyy)
ALI LARTER IS INDEED PREGNANT:
It's true: "Resident Evil" minx ALI LARTER is pregnant. This will be the first child for her and husband HAYES MACARTHUR.
BILL MURRAY SAYS THE CHANCES FOR "GHOSTBUSTERS 3" HAVE "VAPORIZED" . . . BECAUSE THE MOVIE "YEAR ONE" WAS SO BAD?
BILL MURRAY has made it ABUNDANTLY CLEAR that he doesn't want anything to do with "Ghostbusters 3" . . . and it would take them driving a dump truck of money up to his house for him to even make a cameo. --In a new interview with "GQ" he went even further . . . and said that he doesn't think "Ghostbusters 3" is ever going to happen. --And here's his explanation . . . where he finds a way to blame things on that failed JACK BLACK / MICHAEL CERA comedy "Year One". --Quote, "['Ghostbusters 3'] is all a bunch of crock. It's a crock. HAROLD RAMIS said, 'Oh, I've got these guys, they write on 'The Office' and they're really funny. They're going to write the next 'Ghostbusters'. --"They had just written this movie he directed, ['Year One']. Well, I never went to see [it], but people who did, including other Ghostbusters, said it was one of the worst things they had ever seen in their lives. --"So that ['Ghostbusters 3'] dream just vaporized. That was gone." --As of right now, though, only Bill Murray seems to think "Ghostbusters 3" is dead . . . back in May, Ramis and DAN AYKROYD said it was definitely going to start shooting this fall, with or without Murray.
A REPORTER FINALLY ASKS M. NIGHT SHYAMALAN WHY HIS MOVIES KEEP GETTING WORSE AND WORSE:
Some people have been waiting to hear M. NIGHT SHYAMALAN answer this question since they saw "Signs". Some since "Lady in the Water". Some since "The Happening". And a few even held out through "The Last Airbender". --But a reporter at a press conference in Mexico finally asked Night THE question: Why do your movies keep getting worse and worse? And he answered it. --The reporter said, quote, "You had a very strong start of your career with 'The Sixth Sense' . . . however, the audience has lost its faith in your work. 'Airbender' feels like you want to captivate the audiences again by becoming more commercial. Am I right?" --And Night, after giving a few VERY incredulous looks, answered, quote, "I think if I thought like you, I'd kill myself. Everything you said is the opposite of my instinct as an artist. Your impression of my career is not my impression of my career. --"It's a fascinating thing that you would even characterize my whole career the way you just did, dismissively like that. It's sad. I'm not even sure how to respond to a statement like that. --"I've literally turned down more money in my life to do things because I just don't believe in [them]. I give up most of my salary to keep the sequel rights to my movies just so that they never get exploited. --"Ultimately, I think it's only time that will take that cynicism in your point of view and eradicate it. So I'll just try to make good movies as long as they let me make movies."
(--Here's a video of the question and answer, with more from Night . . .)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_C76QBg2p78
IF THE WRITERS FOR CONAN'S "TONIGHT SHOW" WIN AN AWARD DURING THE EMMY BROADCAST . . . IT *WON'T* BE TELEVISED:
When the Emmy nominations came out two weeks ago, the big news was that CONAN O'BRIEN'S cancelled "Tonight Show" got a nomination, while JAY LENO'S new "Tonight Show" didn't. And the Emmys are on NBC. --Yesterday, there was a rumor going around that the Emmy Powers That Be had decided NOT to include Conan's category in the TV broadcast. --Turns out that's true, but not entirely true. Conan's "Tonight Show" got two big nominations . . . one for Outstanding Variety, Music or Comedy Series, and one for Outstanding Writing in a Variety, Music or Comedy Series. --The WRITING award is the one that won't be shown on the main broadcast . . . it's been pushed into the Creative Arts Emmy ceremony, which takes place on Saturday, August 21st. The Emmys themselves air live on Sunday, August 29th. --The award for best overall variety, music or comedy series WILL still be part of NBC's Emmy broadcast. So if Conan wins . . . and right now, he's the odds-on favorite . . . he will get to accept his Emmy and give a speech live on the network that fired him. --The reason the Variety/Comedy/Music writers are bumped this year is because they were part of the main Emmys last year . . . and the directors were bumped. The TV Academy is alternating years between the two, to cut down the broadcast time. (--One big down side of the writers being bumped from the main ceremony is we won't get to see the hilarious videos they always make to air during the Emmys . . . here are the video montages from the writers from the past three years . . .)
http://www.nypost.com/p/blogs/popwrap/conan_brien_gets_screwed_again_ESqlB7byBW1bYi07Wv14pN
"JERSEY SHORE" STRIKE UPDATE: EVERYONE BUT ANGELINA IS BACK, AND NOW THEY'RE DENYING THAT THE STRIKE EVER HAPPENED:
Two days ago, the cast of "Jersey Shore" allegedly went on STRIKE . . . demanding raises before they film a third season. And, amazingly, MTV agreed that the cast members are underpaid for whatever it is that they do . . . and gave in. --According to the "Hollywood Reporter" and TMZ, all of the cast members have signed back on . . . except for possibly ANGELINA, who was kicked out of the house during the first season and is now the least-famous member of the cast. --The cast members were paid $10,000 per episode for season two and were allegedly demanding $30,000 per episode for season three. MTV reportedly offered them close to that amount, and season three will start shooting this week. --Now that everything's resolved, J-WOWW is denying that the strike ever happened. Quote, "None of it was true. Nobody ever talked about going on strike. Don't believe what you read."
TWO "EVERYBODY LOVES RAYMOND" CAST MEMBERS WILL REUNITE ON ABC'S "THE MIDDLE":
PATRICIA HEATON and DORIS ROBERTS . . . who both starred on "Everybody Loves Raymond" . . . are reuniting. Sort-of. Briefly. Next season, Doris will guest star on Patricia's sitcom on ABC, "The Middle". Doris will be playing a teacher who has Patricia's son in her class.
WEDNESDAY TV REMINDERS: (--Check your local listings.)
--"So You Think You Can Dance" [Performance Show] . . . 8:00 to 10:00 P.M. on Fox. (--The remaining six dancers perform for the show's 150th episode.)
--"Big Brother 12" [Power of Veto competition] . . . 8:00 to 9:00 P.M. on CBS.
--"America's Got Talent" [Results Show] . . . 9:00 to 10:00 P.M. on NBC. (--Four more acts will advance to the top 24.)
--"I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant" [3rd Season Finale] . . . 9:00 to 9:30 P.M. on TLC.
--"Billy the Exterminator" [2nd Season Finale] . . . 10:00 to 10:30 P.M. on A&E.
--"The Real World: New Orleans" . . . 10:00 to 11:00 P.M. on MTV.
--"Pros vs. Joes" [5th Season Premiere] . . . 10:00 to 11:00 P.M. on Spike TV. (--It's the NBA vs. the NFL when former basketball stars Kenny Smith, Rick Fox and Hakeem Olajuwon team up against football stars Terrell Owens, Donovan McNabb and Antonio Gates in a three-on-three basketball contest.)
CONCERT BUSINESS IS DOWN 15% FROM ONE YEAR AGO . . . AND CANCELLATIONS ARE HAPPENING ALL OVER THE PLACE:
Concerts are one of the few remaining ways for music acts to make big money. But that's meant that TONS of artists scheduled tours this year . . . and, with the economy still hurting, people can't afford to go see every artist they'd like to. --And, according to Pollstar, that shows. Right now, the concert business is down 15% from where it was last year. The top 100 tours grossed almost $200 MILLION less in the first six months of 2010 than they did in 2009. --And, all over the country, concerts are being cancelled and rescheduled because of poor ticket sales. --The top, top, top artists are doing OK. JUSTIN BIEBER, LADY GAGA and TAYLOR SWIFT are all selling tickets with no problem --But artists at the next level down . . . like RIHANNA, the JONAS BROTHERS or the gorgeous ladies of LILITH FAIR . . . are really struggling. They're the ones who are having to move to smaller venues or cancel shows outright. --Gary Bongiovanni is the editor-in-chief of Pollstar. He says, quote, "In this summer, we have way too many artists on tour . . . [more] than any market could support even in the best of economic times. --"Live music has a very bright future, but in a tough economic environment, people have to make hard choices."
DO KESHA AND RIHANNA REALLY BRAID EACH OTHER'S HAIR NAKED?
RIHANNA is struggling to sell tickets to her tour this summer, so here's a thought to increase ticket sales: FULL-FRONTAL NUDITY. KESHA is Rihanna's opening act for most dates, and she says they spend PLENTY of time naked BACK stage. --Quote, "We have slumber parties and pillow fights, and we braid each other's hair a lot. We talk about boys, naked." (--Yes, we know she was kidding. Probably. But we're going to pretend she was serious.)
GUNS N' ROSES ANNOUNCED ITS FIRST, AND POSSIBLY ONLY, U.S. TOUR STOP:
GUNS N' ROSES just announced the first, and possibly only, U.S. stop for its Chinese Democracy tour. And, yes, based on everything we know about G n' R there are overwhelming odds it's going to be cancelled . . . but just in case, here it is. --Guns n' Roses will be performing on August 13th in Sturgis, South Dakota, at the Rock n' Rev Festival that's part of the huge Sturgis Motorcycle Rally. --G n' R's Chinese Democracy tour has gone all over the world, but didn't have any U.S. dates planned . . . because the album "Chinese Democracy" did so poorly here.
IF ANYONE MAKES A MOVIE ABOUT OBAMA, DRAKE WANTS TO PLAY HIM:
Before DRAKE was making records, he was a child actor on the Canadian show "Degrassi: The Next Generation". And he wants to dust off his old acting skills for a role he thinks he'd be perfect for: PRESIDENT OBAMA. --Drake said, quote, "I hope somebody makes a movie about Obama's life soon because I could play him. That's my goal. Anytime I see him on TV, I don't change the channel, I pay attention and listen to the inflections of his voice."
ICE CUBE AND YOUNG JEEZY HAVE BOTH ANNOUNCED NEW ALBUM RELEASE DATES:
ICE CUBE'S album "I Am The West" was supposed to come out last Tuesday, but that clearly didn't happen. And now he's announced a new drop date: September 28th. He didn't give a reason for the delay. --YOUNG JEEZY also announced a release date for his new album, "TM103". It's going to drop on September 28th . . . which is his 33rd birthday.
SNOOP SAYS ONE OF THE THINGS THAT SAVED HIS MARRIAGE WAS . . . HIS DAUGHTER GETTING LUPUS:
I think this is the classic definition of finding a silver lining. When SNOOP DOGG'S daughter Cori got LUPUS at age six, it was obviously horrific and terrible . . . but, according to Snoop, in retrospect it also SAVED HIS MARRIAGE. --Snoop says, quote, "I was caught up with Hollywood, and the girls and the night life. I thought I was the man and I was willing to give up what I had at home for that." He even filed for divorce from his wife, Shante. --But then, when Cori got lupus, quote, "I felt helpless. No power, no friends." The disease brought him and Shanti closer . . . and they ended up reconciling and calling off the divorce. --Cori's lupus is currently in remission and she's living as a healthy teenager.
TAYLOR SWIFT'S NEXT ALBUM IS COMING OUT IN OCTOBER . . . AND ONE OF THE SONGS TALKS ABOUT HER FEAR OF COMMITMENT:
You probably had more important things to do yesterday than to sit through TAYLOR SWIFT'S live Webcast. And unless you're a rabid fan, you didn't miss a whole lot. She said her next album is titled "Speak Now" . . . and it drops October 25th. --And she's quite proud that she wrote it entirely on her own. She said, quote, "I didn't have any co-writers. I'd get my best ideas at 3:00 A.M., so I would just finish (the song). The songs that made the cut were the ones I wrote myself." --For me, the most interesting moment was when she described the album's first single, a song called "Mine", which is due out sometime next month. Taylor basically admitted she has a fear commitment, and that's why she can't hang onto a boyfriend. --She said, quote, "It's a song that is about my tendency to run from love. I think it's because that, for me, every really direct example of love I've had in front of me has ended in goodbye, has ended in breakups. --"I've developed this pattern of running away when it comes time to fall in love and to stay in a relationship. The song is sort of about finding the exception to that and finding someone who would make you believe in love and realize that it could work out."
(--If you'd like to hear more, you can check out the Webcast below. For some reason, the timer starts at the 4:12 mark . . .)
http://www.ustream.tv/taylorswift
NAZZY’S RANDOM STUFF
ONE OUT OF THREE MEN DON'T FEEL SAFE WHEN THEIR WIFE OR GIRLFRIEND IS DRIVING:
According to a shocking new survey by an online market research company called OnePoll.com . . . men think that they're better drivers than their wives and girlfriends -Of the 3,000 men surveyed, one in three felt, quote, "frightened" when their wife or girlfriend was driving. --And one in five men said they were NEVER able to relax when their wife or girlfriend was driving. --And overall, one in ten men said that they had actually been "forced" to grab the steering wheel because their wife or girlfriend had taken her eyes off the road, and was drifting towards the opposite lane. --And the same number . . . one in ten . . . have felt it was necessary to ask their wife or girlfriend to pull over, so that they could take over. --A spokesman for OnePoll.com said, quote, "[Men] believe they concentrate a lot better, read road situations more quickly and clearly, and have better reactions." --Not surprisingly, the study also found that one in five couples have argued about the other one's driving. (Telegraph)
HERE ARE THE TOP TEN COMPLAINTS MEN HAVE ABOUT WOMEN'S DRIVING:
So it's simple: Men are better drivers than women. Right guys? At least, we THINK we are. That's according to the results of a survey by OnePoll.com . . . which surveyed 3,000 MEN about the subject.
--Here are the Top Ten Complaints Men Have About Women's Driving.
#1.) Lack of concentration. This was the biggest complaint men had: They think that women are distracted too easily by children, scenery, or other drivers.
#2.) Braking too late. Ladies, you know when your guy is worried about this one. It's when he's pushing his foot down into the floormat and pressing against an imaginary brake.
#3.) Tapping the accelerator. In other words, hitting the accelerator inconsistently, which gives the ride a stop-and-start feel.
#4.) Drifting toward the shoulder. Guys don't like it when you let the car drift from side to side in a lane, instead of keeping it in a straight line. Especially if you drift all the way over to the side of the road, and hit those ridges on the shoulder.
#5.) Getting too close to other cars before passing them.
#6.) Braking too hard.
#7.) Fiddling with the stereo.
#8.) Failure to indicate.
#9.) Going too fast.
#10.) Staying in the middle lane / Not trying to pass.
(Telegraph)
A CITY IN FLORIDA SAYS "LADIES' NIGHT" VIOLATES AN ANTI-DISCRIMINATION ORDINANCE . . . SO BARS ARE HAVING "SHAVED LEGS NIGHT" INSTEAD:
You know what "Ladies' Night" means, right? That's when bars and clubs do drink specials for the ladies, or let them drink for free, or waive the cover fee . . . basically, whatever it takes to pack the women in and dilute the sea-of-sausage. -But now that's considered a violation of an anti-discrimination ordinance in Gainesville, Florida. (???) (--Gainesville's in the north-central part of Florida, and home to the University of Florida.) --In fact, a few months ago, the city sent official letters to all 155 of the city's booze-serving locations, and warned them about it. --But everyone knows that a proper ratio of male-to-female genitalia is ESSENTIAL for a successful hook-up scene. So to keep the meat market thing humming along, the bars in Gainesville have just had to get around the ordinance, and get creative. --For example, at a place called the Rue Bar, Friday isn't "Ladies' Night" anymore . . . it's "High Heels" night. And at a place called the Grog House, since they can't call Wednesday nights "Ladies' Night" . . . they call it "Shaved Legs" night. --Obviously there's a loophole here, and yes, dudes CAN drink for free if they're man enough to show up with shaved legs or high heels. According to the Grog House, at least five guys have shown up with shaved legs so far. (Sun Sentinel/ Gainesville Sun)
A COP IN BOSTON HAD TO RESIGN AFTER LEAVING HIS PATROL TO SEE BRIDGET THE MIDGET AT A STRIP CLUB:
28-year-old Richard P. Bennett is one of Massachusetts's finest. Or rather, he WAS one of Massachusetts's finest . . . right up until he went to a strip club while on duty to meet a midget porno star. Here's what happened. --Richard was a cop in Stoughton (--It's pronounced Stoe-tun, and it's about half an hour south of Boston). Last month he was on patrol, keeping the peace and insuring the public safety, when he learned some delightful news . . .--29-year-old Bridget Powers . . . a.k.a. "Bridget the Midget" . . . was set to appear at a local gentleman's club called Alex's. Bridget's a 3-foot-9-inch-tall porno star, and like other adult film skanks, she hits the strip club circuit from time to time. --According to Stoughton Police Chief Paul Shastany, quote, "[Officer Bennett] went there and left his beat and wanted to meet this person." (--Who you calling "this person"?! It's "this LITTLE person.") --Richard only took a quick look inside . . . we're not sure if he ever actually met Bridget the Midget . . . but unfortunately for him, five of his fellow officers ratted him out. And he knew he'd get fired for it, so he resigned. --According to Officer Bennett, quote, "A part of me wants to say, 'Where was the news when I pulled someone out of a burning car last year?' You know all the good things you do, and I'm going to be remembered for one stupid decision. It just sucks."
(Boston Herald)
"PLAYBOY" LAUNCHES A 'SAFE FOR WORK' SITE:
If you're one of the people who still reads "Playboy" . . . and I mean, one of the people who still looks at "Playboy" at ALL . . . I have some good news for you this morning. --Yesterday, "Playboy" launched a website called TheSmokingJacket.com, and it's 'Safe For Work.' As opposed to websites that are Not Safe For Work . . . or NSFW . . . meaning the ones that have all the really good stuff. --Obviously, the 'Smoking Jacket' part is a reference to the trademark jacket HUGH HEFNER supposedly wears when he's lounging around the Playboy Mansion. As for the content of the site . . . no nudity, obviously. --But it's got articles, and plenty of them. It's basically "Ask Men" or "Maxim" type stuff, like "How to Get Laid at Work", or "Seven Signs That You've given Up on Getting Laid." --Playboy Enterprises is billing it as a, quote, "new safe-for-work men's entertainment destination, that provides guys with smart and sexy distractions throughout the day." (ABC)
NINE THINGS YOUR KIDS DON'T NEED:
There's a website called WalletPop, and they recently put up a list of nine things your kids don't REALLY need. The idea is that parents are being suckered into buying overpriced junk, and that kids wouldn't notice a thing if you passed on this stuff.
--But what else is new? You could say that about pretty much every child's toy since the invention of "playing outside." Anyway, here's the list:
#9.) Early reading kits for babies. These are those DVD and flashcard kits that some parents feel pressured to buy, so their kids will be the very FIRST to read. But just read them books and skip the pseudo-science.
#8.) Silly Bandz. These are those rubber bands shaped like animals and dinosaurs and stuff. They turn into bracelets, then go back to their original shape when you take them off. But they're all the rage, so good luck refusing your kids this one.
#7.) Designer Diapers. Huggies has ones that look like jeans, and Pampers has other variations. But they cost about 60% more than regular diapers. Oh, and they're ridiculous.
#6.) High Heels For Little Girls. The backlash on this one's already going strong, so let's hope it's officially dead.
#5.) Manicures, Pedicures, and Spa Treatments. I'm not sure anyone really does this, other than celebrity kids or super-pampered rich kids. Either way it's lame.
#4.) Yoga. Does this one really even need to be explained? (--Look, stretching's fine . . . but it should be followed by a hearty game of grab-ass.)
#3.) Organic Bedding. If you want to start your kids on organic FOOD, or the vegetarian thing, go ahead. But organic bedding is just a way to over-sell do-gooder parents who have money to burn. Twin sets go for $295, and a crib set's $380.
#2.) Diaper Wipe Warmers.
#1.) 3D Movies. If you ask me, this one should be banned for ALL of us. Unless, like "Avatar", it was FILMED that way. But now they're tacking on crappy 3D effects to EVERY movie . . . and usually it doesn't justify the higher ticket price. (WalletPop)
NAZZY’S SILLY VIDEOS OF THE DAY
#1.) A BUNCH OF RUSSIANS TOOK A DONKEY PARASAILING:
A bunch of idiots in southern Russia made a donkey go parasailing, and now police have launched an animal cruelty investigation. There's cell phone video of it on the Internet, and it's really poor quality. But it does appear to be a donkey . . . parasailing.
(--Search for "donkey parasailing video." It takes off at :28.)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hEep5BrexT0
#2.) A PITCHER GOT HIT IN THE HEAD WITH A LINE DRIVE:
On Monday, a pitcher for the Texas Rangers named DUSTIN NIPPERT got hit in the head by a line drive, and I mean HARD. Nippert immediately dropped to the ground . . . as you'd expect. But he was okay. --Yesterday, the Rangers put him on the 15-day disabled list as a precaution. (--Search for "Dustin Nippert head video MLB.com." You have to watch a short ad before it starts. He gets hit at :06, and there's a replay at :41.)
http://mlb.mlb.com/video/play.jsp?content_id=10061067
#3.) HERE'S A THOROUGH DISCUSSION ABOUT ALL THE REASONS "BACK TO THE FUTURE" IS SICK, TWISTED, AND INSANE:
Cracked.com has a great video of four people talking about the movie "Back To The Future" and laying out all the reasons it's sick, twisted, and insane . . . and they're RIGHT. (--Search for "Cracked.com Back To The Future secretly horrifying." You have to watch a 30-second ad before it starts.)
http://www.cracked.com/vid6eo_18203_why-back-to-future-secretly-horrifying.html
THE SIX MOST SURPRISING WAYS ALCOHOL IS GOOD FOR YOU:
Everyone knows that a glass of wine a day is good for your heart. But the website Cracked.com put together a list of the six most SURPRISING ways alcohol is good for you. Here's the list . . .
#1.) ALOCHOL CAN HELP YOU LOSE WEIGHT. In a study of 37,000 people, the ones who had a few drinks a week were thinner than people who didn't drink at all. Not surprisingly, BINGE drinkers were the chubbiest.
#2.) ALCOHOL IS AN ANTIDOTE. The ingredient in antifreeze that makes it work is called ethylene glycol (--pronounced eth-a-leen GLY-call. And it's EXTREMELY poisonous.
--If you drink it, symptoms include vomiting, diarrhea, paranoia, dementia, and hallucinations. And eventually, it forms little, needle-shaped crystals inside your body that shred your kidneys and kill you.
--But if you call Poison Control, they'll tell you to drink a few shots of vodka, THEN go to the hospital.
--Here's why: Your body digests ethanol quickly, and vodka is basically just ethanol and water. So if you drink enough vodka, you should be able to pass the ethylene glycol in your urine before it crystallizes and kills you.
--The method is so reliable, it's used in hospitals all over the world.
#3.) ALCOHOL IMPROVES YOUR LIBIDO. But only if you drink a little. Studies have shown that men who drink in moderation are 20 to 30 percent less likely to have problems with erectile dysfunction.
#3.) ALCOHOL MAKES YOU SMARTER. In a study that was published in the "British Medical Journal," people who had 30 drinks per week performed better on logic and reasoning tests than people who drank very little or didn't drink at all.
--And they even scored better on short-term MEMORY tests.
#5.) ALCOHOL HELPS IF YOU TAKE A SHOT TO THE HEAD. Researchers studied almost 40,000 cases of people with head injuries. And patients had less swelling in their brains if they were DRUNK when the injury occurred.
--The reason alcohol keeps your brain from swelling is because it's an anti-inflammatory, like ibuprofen.
#6.) ALCOHOL CAN SAVE YOUR LIFE. When you fall down, your body usually tenses up and braces for impact.
--But when you're drunk, your central nervous system is basically numb, so your body stays relaxed, and not as much of the force is transferred to your bones and vital organs.
--Here's an example, but don't try this at home: A Russian guy drank THREE BOTTLES OF VODKA, then jumped out of his kitchen window. He fell FIVE STORIES, then he got up, walked upstairs, and jumped AGAIN.
--And he survived with just a few cuts and bruises.
(Cracked.com)
SITE FOR SORE EYES:
www.IWriteLike.com
This new website claims it can find your inner author. The recently launched I Write Like has one simple gimmick: You paste a few paragraphs that exemplify your writing, then click “analyze” and you get a badge telling you that you write like Stephen King or Ernest Hemingway, among others.
UNDERPANTS SURVEY
As Freshpair gears up to celebrate the eighth annual National Underwear Day in August, the company has released some surprising facts about underpants:
· 80% of Americans never change the style of their underwear once they become an adult – and 60% of those don’t even wear underwear that fits!
· 24% of American men say they have a “lucky” pair of underwear.
· 40% of men prefer briefs, while 10% opt for boxers, leaving the rest either in trunks, boxers briefs, thongs, or commando.
· As far as women, 34% match their bras to their panties.
For the first two weeks of August, Freshpair.com is giving away 5,000 pairs of free underwear.
AMERICA’S TAKEOUT HABITS
Friday night is the most popular night for Americans to order takeout, according to a new survey by Turning Leaf wine. Here’s the dish on the survey results:
· 34% of respondents have passed off takeout food as something they have made from scratch.
· When asked where they prefer to eat a takeout meal, it was a 50/50 split between cozying up on the living room couch and sitting down at the dining room table.
· 61% of Americans have stolen a bite of food before bringing it home.
· 41% of Americans chose Chinese as their all-time favorite takeout cuisine, with Italian coming in second (21%).
posted by Nazzy @ 6:05 AM
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