Friday, September 3, 2010

HOLLYWOOD DIRT OVERFLOW (09-03-10)

MICHAEL BAY VS. THE PUPPY TOSSER

"TRANSFORMERS" DIRECTOR MICHAEL BAY IS OFFERING $50,000 FOR THE IDENTITY OF THE GIRL WHO THREW THOSE PUPPIES IN THE RIVER:

Remember the video of that teenage girl throwing helpless puppies into a river? Who can forget it, right? (--Check it out here . . .) (--WARNING!!! It's pretty graphic and disturbing . . .)
http://www.liveleak.com/view?i=bb4_1283184704
--Well, "Transformers" director MICHAEL BAY is offering $50,000 for information leading to the, quote, "arrest and successful prosecution" of the girl and whoever shot the video. --The thing is, somebody may have already found them. --Some Internet geeks did some sleuthing, and determined this video is the work of a Bosnian girl and her brother. And supposedly, police are already investigating. --Meanwhile, a girl named Katja Puschnik has identified herself as the puppy-thrower, and posted an apology on YouTube. She claimed the puppies belonged to her grandmother, but they had parasites and had to be killed. --And she chose to throw them in the river because she didn't want them to suffer and thought that would be a quick death. (--She did not, however, explain why she seemed to have so much fun doing it, or why she said, "Wheee!" as she threw one of them.) --An apology was also posted on a different site by a guy claiming to be the cameraman. --The guy does repeat the story that the puppies were diseased, but he doesn't identify himself as the puppy-thrower's brother . . . and he says nothing about the dogs belonging to his grandmother. --He just says that, quote, "some dog gave birth in my courtyard." Thus, we have no idea if these apologies are related . . . or if either one of them is even legit.
(--But you can read both of them in their entirety at this link . . .)
http://www.urlesque.com/2010/09/02/girl-throws-puppies-river-vigilante/
(--This has become a pretty HUGE issue all over the country . . . along with the video of that British lady throwing the cat into the garbage can.) (--And thousands . . . if not MILLIONS . . . of people are calling for these sick animal abusers to meet a SLOW, GRISLY DEATH. And I just have to wonder . . . are we taking things too far?)


CHELSEA HANDLER HAS APPARENTLY BROKEN UP WITH HER ANIMAL PLANET BOYFRIEND:

It looks like CHELSEA HANDLER and Animal Planet host DAVE SALMONI have broken up. --In case you missed it . . . and you probably did . . . Chelsea addressed it in her monologue on Wednesday night's "Chelsea Lately". --She said, quote, "Up until a couple weeks ago, I was working very intimately with the Animal Planet, but unfortunately, that contract was terminated. --"However, I enjoyed being in bed with them and may hook up for an occasional project." --"Us Magazine" tried to get more details, but Chelsea's rep told them, quote, "She saves all commentary about her personal life for her own show."
(--Here's video . . .)
http://www.eonline.com/uberblog/b198580_chelsea_handler_handles_dave_salmoni.html


BRAD PITT IS THE MAN MOST GUYS WOULD LET THEIR LADY SLEEP WITH . . . AND MEGAN FOX IS THE GIRL MOST WOMEN WOULD LET THEIR GUY NAIL:

Some British website conducted a poll to see what celebrities people would most likely allow their partners to cheat with. --You know, it's like the old game where you get to pick a list of celebrities who . . . if you ever, by some act of nature or God . . . got the chance to rub genitalia with them . . . your spouse would have to let you, and it wouldn't count as cheating. --People were asked, first of all, if they even have such a list. And those who did were asked who was on it. --The results aren't very surprising. 72% of guys had MEGAN FOX on their list . . . and 69% of women had BRAD PITT. --Here are the other, most popular choices.

MEN:

#1.) Megan Fox, 72%
#2.) Jennifer Aniston, 69%
#3.) Beyoncé, 68%
#4.) Jessica Alba, 66%
#5.) Angelina Jolie, 64%
#6.) Cheryl Cole, 62% . . . (--She's a British singer (slash) actress.)
#7.) Katy Perry, 59%
#8.) Nicole Scherzinger, 57%
#9.) Christina Aguilera, 55%
#10.) Rihanna, 53%

WOMEN:

#1.) Brad Pitt, 69%
#2.) Johnny Depp, 67%
#3.) Gerard Butler, 66%
#4.) David Beckham, 63%
#5.) Robert Pattinson, 61%
#6.) Ashton Kutcher, 58% (???)
#7.) George Clooney, 57%
#8.) Justin Timberlake, 54%
#9.) Will Smith, 52%
#10.) Hugh Jackman, 51%


IS JENNIFER ANISTON PICKING AT LINDSAY LOHAN'S TABLE SCRAPS?

JENNIFER ANISTON might be picking at LINDSAY LOHAN'S table scraps. RadarOnline.com says she's been seen out with a guy named Harry Morton. --He's an heir to the Hard Rock Cafe fortune, and the founder of the Pink Taco restaurant chain. And he dated Lindsay on-and-off in 2006. --A so-called "witness" says Jennifer and Harry had dinner together earlier this week in Los Angeles, where they, quote, "appeared to be flirting as she touched his arm several times, sat next to him and they looked at photos together." --Jennifer is 41 . . . Harry is 29.


PARIS HILTON OWNS A PURSE JUST LIKE THE ONE SHE TOLD POLICE WASN'T HERS:

When cocaine fell out of PARIS HILTON'S purse and into the hands of a Las Vegas Police officer, Paris told the cop that the coke . . . and the purse . . . weren't hers. --But back in July, Paris Tweeted about an awesome new Chanel purse she'd just bought. She also posted a picture of it. --And wouldn't you know . . . it happens to look EXACTLY LIKE the one she was carrying in Vegas last Friday. (--Sadly, we couldn't find a clear, close-up shot of the purse from Friday night in Vegas. But several media outlets are saying that it IS the same style of purse . . .) http://www.eonline.com/uberblog/b198569_will_not-my-bag_defense_work_paris.html


PARIS HILTON MIGHT HAVE TO PAY $160,000 FOR NOT PROMOTING ONE OF HER CRAPPY MOVIES:

As you may recall, a film distribution company called World Entertainment Group sued PARIS HILTON a few years ago, claiming that she caused one of her movies to fail by not promoting it. --WEG said Paris pocketed her $1 million fee for the 2006 straight-to-DVD flick "Pledge This!", then bagged on her promotional duties . . . causing them about $8.3 million in losses. --Well, yesterday a judge agreed that Paris failed to live up to her obligations. But he doesn't plan on making her return the whole $1 million. --He tentatively set the damages at $160,000 . . . but plans to review the case further before nailing down the exact amount. (--Hey, even 160-grand is a lot. That buys a lot of blow.)


ELLEN POMPEO DOES *NOT* HAVE SIX TOES ON EACH FOOT:

ELLEN POMPEO is trying to put that rumor about her having 12 toes to rest. Despite those pictures we saw yesterday, Ellen says she has 10 toes . . . five on each foot . . . just like the rest of us. --And TMZ printed some pictures of Ellen's feet that back that up. One of them is a close-up of one of the pics we saw yesterday . . . the one of Ellen's right foot. And it appears that the "sixth toe" is just the result of a crappy image. --They also printed another picture of Ellen's right foot, in which it does NOT appear that there's an extra toe there. --Meanwhile, "Grey's Anatomy" producer Shonda Rhimes chimed in on the "controversy" on Twitter, saying, quote, "Pompeo and I are still laughing. --"She says to tell everyone the rumors are wrong . . . she has SEVEN toes on each foot!"

WHAT'S GEORGE CLOONEY'S BIGGEST FAILURE? NOT BEING ABLE TO CHANGE ANYTHING IN DARFUR:

After today, if anyone ever asks you what GEORGE CLOONEY considers THE GREATEST FAILURE OF HIS LIFE, you're going to know the answer --It's DARFUR. --Several years ago, George and his dad smuggled cameras into Darfur refugee camps to show the world how horrible the civil war there was making things. But their efforts really had NO EFFECT on the region. --He told Britain's not-always-reliable "Sun" tabloid, quote, "I've been honored to be able to lend my celebrity to help wherever I can, especially on behalf of the United Nations. --"But in the case of Darfur it's been the greatest failure of my life. -"With other people, we've been able to get a lot of attention focused on the terrible situation there and nothing has changed. It's very frustrating."


DOES ZSA ZSA GABOR'S HUSBAND WANT TO PRESERVE HER BODY WITH PLASTIC???

ZSA ZSA GABOR isn't dead yet. But her husband, Prince Frederic von Anhalt, is already making plans for her remains. He says he's going to preserve her through a process called PLASTINATION. --But he claims it was Zsa Zsa's idea. --He says, quote, "My wife has always dreamt that her beauty would be immortal. I would like to show the plastinated body of Zsa Zsa Gabor in the context of a scene in one of her films." --Von Anhalt even has an anatomist ready to do the work. (--According to Wikipedia, plastination is, quote, "a technique used in anatomy to preserve bodies or body parts.) (--"The water and fat are replaced by certain plastics, yielding specimens that can be touched, do not smell or decay, and even retain most properties of the original sample.")


DAVID LETTERMAN'S EXTORTIONIST IS A FREE MAN:

Robert Halderman . . . the former TV producer who tried to extort DAVID LETTERMAN and ended up exposing Dave's CHEATING WAYS . . . was released from prison yesterday morning. --He served four months of his six-month sentence. They released him early for good behavior. (--That is all.)


THANKS TO DR. OZ, OPRAH WINFREY NOW WANTS TO GET HER COLON PROBED:

Now that DR. OZ has discovered a precancerous polyp in his colon, his TV mentor, OPRAH WINFREY, is thinking about getting HER backside violated by her personal physician --Dr. Oz says, quote, "She said, this makes me want to get a colonoscopy right away. She'd been putting it off, like I would have done. But she saw how important it is to have early detection." --He added, quote, "Her main question, classic Oprah, was, 'I don't care about this stuff. Are you okay? That's the bigger question.' It's all about how do you deal with the rough waters you hit? This was a storm that came over the horizon."


NEW MOVIES THIS WEEKEND

"MACHETE" HITS THEATERS *TODAY*!!!

#1.) "Machete" (R)

--It stars the very badass Danny Trejo as Machete, a legendary ex-federale who's randomly chosen to be the fall guy for a crooked political assassination. But, like the trailer says, they just "(effed) with the wrong Mexican." --"Machete" started as one of the fake trailers during the "Grindhouse" double feature that Robert Rodriguez and Quentin Tarantino released in 2007. But everyone loved those few minutes so much, Rodriguez decided to actually make the movie. --Cheech Marin and Jeff Fahey will also reprise their roles from the fake trailer. --And they've gathered an amazing supporting cast that includes Michelle Rodriguez, looking about as sexy as a human female is allowed to by law . . . Jessica Alba, Robert De Niro, Steven Seagal, Don Johnson, and Lindsay Lohan. --Lindsay only has a small role, including her "nun with a gun" action. But don't get your hopes too high for her nude scene because, according to Mr. Skin, she uses a body double whenever her naughty bits aren't otherwise strategically covered by her hair. (--Read Mr. Skin's analysis of the Lindsay Lohan and Jessica Alba scenes HERE.) -That's not to say there's a shortage of flesh. Director Robert Rodriguez used the same trick of front-loading the movie with nudity that he used in "Sin City". That way, ANYONE who's scantily clad still registers as nude in your dirty little mind. (--Forget "Inception". Screw "Eclipse". This is THE most-anticipated movie of the summer. And if you're tired of all the soulless, watered-down garbage that's been littering movie screens these days, you MUST help make it a hit!!!)
Trailer: http://www.imdb.com/video/imdb/vi1520109081/
Official Site: http://www.vivamachete.com/

#2.) "The American" (R) (Opened Wednesday)

--A suspense thriller starring George Clooney as an assassin hiding out in Italy after a job goes bad. Despite wanting to quit the business, he accepts "one last job" building a custom rifle for a sexy female assassin . . . and starts up an affair with a local prostitute. --As you might expect, quitting gets a little more complicated than he'd like. Stick with "Machete" if you're looking for non-stop action. But if you're satisfied with a slow, brooding pace and desire the sight of a shirtless George Clooney, then this is for you.

Trailer: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ChQB0vpCQWw
Official Site: http://focusfeatures.com/film/the_american/


#3.) "Going The Distance" (R)

--A romantic comedy starring Drew Barrymore and Justin Long as a couple stumbling through a long-distance relationship after an intense six-week summer fling. -Charlie Day from "It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia" and Jason Sudeikis from "Saturday Night Live" play his drinking buddies . . . and Christina Applegate plays Drew's overprotective sister. -The film doesn't look especially amusing from the trailer, but you might get a laugh from Christina Applegate catching them having sex on her dining room table . . . and then cringing through a family dinner whenever anyone's food touches that table.

Trailer: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1HGDx2cAdMo
Official Site: http://going-the-distance.warnerbros.com/


#4.) "The Winning Season" (PG-13) (L.A. and New York)

--A comedy starring Sam Rockwell as a loser who takes a job coaching high school girls basketball. Emma Roberts is his star player and Rob Corddry is the principal.

Trailer: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pyaRrvC450g
Official Site: http://www.winningseasonmovie.com/


AN EXTRA WAS SERIOUSLY INJURED ON THE SET OF "TRANSFORMERS 3":

An extra was seriously injured Wednesday night on the set of "Transformers 3" just outside of Chicago. (--Technically, they were in the state of Indiana.) --The woman . . . 24-year-old Gabriela Cedillo . . . suffered a severe head injury while sitting behind the wheel of a car. -Here's what another extra told the local ABC affiliate . . . quote, "The vehicle was being towed by another vehicle -"The cable between the two vehicles broke. It whipped around and sliced through the woman's car and sliced through her skull, apparently." --Filming for yesterday was cancelled, and Cedillo is in critical condition at a nearby hospital. (--You can see a picture of Gabriela, and watch a local news report on the accident . . . here . . .)
http://www.radaronline.com/exclusives/2010/09/video-transformers-3-extra-seriously-injured-after-stunt-went-wrong
--There's been no word yet from anyone involved in the movie. (--Michael Bay must still be too busy chasing puppy-tossing Bosian teens.)


ANGELINA JOLIE HAS DROPPED OUT OF A MOVIE SHE WAS GOING TO DO WITH ROBERT DOWNEY JR.:

ANGELINA JOLIE was supposed to make a sci-fi drama called "Gravity" with ROBERT DOWNEY JR., but MTV says she dropped out to focus on other projects . . . whatever they might be. --The movie is about two astronauts who are stranded in orbit after their space station explodes. There's no word yet on Angelina's replacement.



THE SIMON SUCCESSOR SEARCH

JENNIFER LOPEZ'S "AMERICAN IDOL" DEAL IS, QUOTE, "IMMINENT":

On July 30th, it sounded like a DONE DEAL that JENNIFER LOPEZ would replace ELLEN DEGENERES on "American Idol". --Since then, we've run the gamut: --She's in . . . maybe she's not in . . . she's in again . . . no one is in . . . she's in, but her contract is still being negotiated . . . she's out because she's SUCH A DIVA . . . she's not a diva, and she's still under consideration . . . and on and on and on. --It's been like reporting off a MOOD RING everyday. --And today, the mood is . . . GOOD. If you like J-Lo as a judge, that is. --TMZ is now in Week Five of covering . . . whatever this is . . . and they're reporting that Jennifer's "Idol" deal is, quote, "imminent." --Supposedly, she's in the "final stages" of negotiations . . . and it's "all but a done deal" . . . and that unless there's a "last-minute snag," the deal could be closed by early next week. --And, for the record, a source says she has NOT been a diva . . . quote, "It's been typical negotiating." (--"American Idol" will likely officially announce all their judges sometime next week.)


MARTHA STEWART WANTS TO BE THE NEXT GREAT INTERVIEWER:

"The Martha Stewart Show" is moving to the Hallmark Channel on September 13th. As part of her deal, Martha will have a hand in programming pretty much all of Hallmark's daytime schedule. --And she's going to use her leverage to accomplish a new goal: She wants to be the next great interviewer. --She says, quote, "My favorite interviewers are Larry King [and] Barbara Walters, both of whom are kind of retiring. Who's going to take their place as the serious, great interviewer? --"I'm throwing my name in there, because I love to talk to people." --Martha's interview wish-list includes: MICHELLE OBAMA, Secretary of State HILLARY CLINTON and House Speaker NANCY PELOSI. --Martha begins her quest on September 19th, with an hour-long PRIMETIME special featuring one-on-one interviews with various fashion designers.


BRYAN CRANSTON WILL HOST "SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE":

Former "Malcolm in the Middle" dad BRYAN CRANSTON just won the Best Actor in a Drama Emmy for "Breaking Bad" . . . and now he'll host "Saturday Night Live" on October 2nd. (--Hopefully that made at least one person's day.) (???)


WEEKEND TV REMINDERS


FRIDAY TV REMINDERS:

--"Camp Rock 2: The Final Jam" . . . 8:00 to 10:00 P.M. on Disney Channel. (--Demi Lovato and the Jonas Brothers are back in this sequel to the TV-musical Camp Rock as they pull together to battle a rival music camp.)

--"The Short List: 10 Cutest Celebrity Babies" [1st Season Finale] . . . 9:00 to 9:30 P.M. on VH1.

SATURDAY TV REMINDERS:

--"Saturday Night Live" . . . 11:30 P.M. to 1:00 A.M. on NBC. (--Tina Fey guest hosts and Justin Bieber is the musical guest.) (REPEAT)

SUNDAY TV REMINDERS:

--"Freaky Eaters" [SERIES Premiere] . . . 10:00 to 11:00 P.M. on TLC.
(--Nutrition specialist J.J. Virgin and psychotherapist Mike Dow help people with bizarre compulsions to particular foods overcome their dangerous addictions.)


LABOR DAY TV REMINDERS:

--"The Secret Life of the American Teenager" [3rd Season Finale] . . . 8:00 to 9:00 P.M. on ABC Family.

--"Little People, Big World" [6th Season Premiere] . . . 8:00 to 9:00 P.M. on TLC.

--"CBS Fall Preview" . . . 8:30 to 9:00 P.M. on CBS. (--James Belushi and Jerry O'Connell host a sneak peek at the CBS fall lineup, including "Hawaii Five-O", "Blue Bloods", "The Defenders", "Mike & Molly" and "$#*! My Dad Says".)

--"Nickelodeon's Mega Music Fest 2010" . . . 8:00 to 9:00 P.M. on Nickelodeon. (--John Leguizamo hosts a concert for preschoolers with performances by Justin Bieber, Wyclef Jean, Colbie Caillat, The Roots, and Yo Gabba Gabba!.)

--"Mad" [SERIES Premiere] . . . 8:30 to 9:00 P.M. on the Cartoon Network. (--A new animated series that's based on the famous "Mad" magazine.)

--"Aftermath with William Shatner" [1st Season Finale] . . . 10:00 to 11:00 P.M. on Bio. (--William Shatner interviews David Kaczynski, brother of convicted Unabomber Ted Kaczynski.)

--"The Real Housewives of New Jersey" [Reunion Conclusion] . . . 10:00 to 11:15 P.M. on Bravo.

--"100 Greatest Artists of All Time" [Parts One & Two] . . . 10:00 P.M. to Midnight on VH1. (--A four-night special ranking the top artists features commentary from Usher, Whitney Houston, Sheryl Crow and Bret Michaels.)

--"Thintervention with Jackie Warner" [SERIES Premiere] . . . 10:15 to 11:30 P.M. on Bravo. (--"Work Out's" Jackie Warner tries to get eight overweight clients in shape, including "Real Housewives of Orange County's" Jeana Keough.)

--"Obsessed" [2nd Season Finale] . . . 11:00 P.M. to Midnight on A&E.


AND NOW . . . AXL ROSE HAS TICKED OFF FANS IN IRELAND:

GUNS N' ROSES' European tour continues to SUCK and thoroughly disappoint fans. (--Earlier this week, they were at least a half-hour late to two shows . . . and were then forced to end shows earlier than they wanted to because of curfews.) --This time, chaos erupted at a show in Dublin, Ireland, on Wednesday night. As usual, Guns was late, and the show started over 90 minutes behind schedule. --When they DID make it onstage, they couldn't even make it all the way through the first song, "Welcome to the Jungle", without an incident. --Some upset fans were throwing water bottles onstage . . . and AXL ROSE stopped the band to tell the crowd, quote, "Here's the deal: One more bottle, we go home. It's up to you. We'd like to stay. We wanna have some fun. --"If you don't wanna have fun, let us know. We got no problem, we'll go on our way." --Three songs later, more bottles were thrown . . . and Axl stuck to his word. He said, quote, "OK, that's it. Good night. Have a nice evening." And the band walked off the stage. --After the band left the stage . . . someone came out and tried to get the crowd to calm down. She said there were some, quote, "technical difficulties." But that actually seemed to incense the crowd more. --Later someone else came onstage and told the crowd that they were trying hard to get Axl to return . . . but he asked them to quote, "refrain from throwing items at him." --About an hour later, Guns finally went out and finished their set. Supposedly because the promoters refused to let them leave unless they did. But by then, most of the crowd had already left. --It's unclear if refunds will be issued. According to some reports, a lot of people left because the lights were turned on and security told them the show was over. --Afterwards the promoters bashed Axl for his habitual lateness . . . but did say that, quote, "no artist should be subjected to missiles and unknown substances being thrown at them." (--You can fan-shot video of Axl warning the crowd below. ***WARNING***: At the end, there's some BLEEPED PROFANITY from someone in the crowd.)
http://www.tmz.com/videos?autoplay=true&mediaKey=53354bc7-96b0-49c8-9f65-b2a52fc7d966
(--And here's an UNEDITED VIDEO . . . in which you can hear the crowd BOO as the band takes the stage. There are a lot of UNCENSORED F-BOMBS . . .)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nxLUUQdqA0I


DETAILS ON CROSBY, STILLS & NASH'S COVERS ALBUM:

CROSBY, STILLS & NASH'S next album will be a classic rock covers disc. (--It'll be produced by RICK RUBIN, the guy behind those last JOHNNY CASH CDs.) --It's only about a third of the way done, but some of the covers will include: The Rolling Stones' "Ruby Tuesday", the Beatles' "Norwegian Wood", the Allman Brothers Band's "Midnight Rider", Bob Dylan's "Girl From the North Country" . . . . . . Jackson Browne's "Lives in the Balance", James Taylor's "You Can Close Your Eyes", and "Uncle John's Band" by the Grateful Dead. -The band expects to finish recording the album sometime next year. There's no release date yet.


HERE'S A VIDEO OF STAR-STRUCK GIRLS *LOSING IT* OVER THE JONAS BROTHERS:

The JONAS BROTHERS were in the Detroit suburb of Rochester Hills on Tuesday for a "meet and greet" . . . and perhaps not surprisingly, it was a ridiculously emotional experience for some of the girls who got to meet them. --One girl even said, quote, "I couldn't breathe, my whole body was numb and I told them I love them." (--Here's video of girls LOSING IT over the Jonas boys . . .)
http://www.wxyz.com/dpp/entertainment/jonas-brothers%2C-demi-lovato-coming-to-michigan


T.I.'S PROBATION IS IN DANGER: HE AND HIS WIFE WERE ARRESTED ON SUSPICION OF DRUG POSSESSION CHARGES:

When T.I. was released from custody earlier this year, there was only one thing he NEEDED to make sure he did . . . and that is: NOT get arrested. Unfortunately for him, he blew that on Wednesday night. --The details are pretty vague at this point, but here's what we know: --T.I. and his wife, Tameka "Tiny" Cottle, who were both riding in a sweet Maybach, were pulled over after making an illegal U-turn in West Hollywood at 10:18 P.M. --While approaching the vehicle, the cops smelled marijuana, so they conducted a search. That's when they discovered some pills that, quote, "resembled ecstasy." --T.I. and Tiny were taken in and booked for suspicion of drug possession. They were released at 4:00 A.M. after posting $10,000 bail, each. --After being released, Tiny posted a message on Twitter saying, quote, "Jus wanted 2say thank u 2every1 dats been leaving encouraging msgs & prayers! We love u guys :) Going 2bed now! So glad 2b n a nice clean bed." --The L.A. Sheriff's Department has confirmed that they're testing pills that they think might be ecstasy, and added that, quote, "no other drugs were found." --So yeah, that means despite smelling "a strong odor of marijuana" . . . no pot was found. (--Something tells me that will inevitably be scrutinized down the road, when someone claims T.I. was searched without sufficient cause.) (--By the way, TMZ was "publishing" all kinds of rapid-fire reports yesterday afternoon, making all kinds of . . . what turned out to be . . . bogus claims.) (--First, they had T.I. with methamphetamines . . . and later it was codeine from Sizzurp, a.k.a. Purple Drank, the concoction made from cough syrup.) (--And how did they deduce that it could be Sizzurp? Because in a paparazzi picture of T.I.'s car, you can see Styrofoam cups . . . and that's what you usually drink Sizzurp out of. Seriously. This is reporting in the Internet Age.) --But here's the issue: T.I. could DO SERIOUS TIME for this. --Five months ago, T.I. was released from custody . . . after serving seven months in prison and three months in a halfway house on felony weapons charges. (--T.I. was caught buying unregistered machine guns and silencers.) --He's on supervised probation through 2013. Obviously, a drug arrest would violate the terms of his probation, but it's too early to tell if he could be sent back to prison. --Naturally, the drug test is the first domino. If it comes back negative . . . he's all good. If it's positive, T.I. is definitely in danger of having his probation revoked. In the meantime, T.I.'s probation officer has asked him to return to Atlanta.


NAZZY’S RANDOM STUFF

ONE OF THE TRAPPED CHILEAN MINERS WAS CAUGHT HAVING AN AFFAIR WHEN HIS WIFE *AND* HIS MISTRESS SHOW UP OUTSIDE THE MINE:

Those 33 miners in Chile are still trapped underground, and they might not be rescued until Christmas. For most of them, that probably seems like an eternity. But as far as one of them is concerned, that's WAY too soon --50-year-old Yonni Barrios is that miner. And he's in no hurry to get out . . . because while he's been down there, his wife found out about his MISTRESS. --Yonni's wife, 56-year-old Marta Salinas, was recently at the entrance to the mine, holding a vigil for him. And she was shocked to see another woman, Susana Valenzuela, ALSO holding a vigil for Yonni. --She connected the dots, and realized her husband was having an affair. --According to the "London Sun", she said, quote, "[He's] my husband. He loves me and I'm his wife. This woman has no legitimacy." --Susana, the mistress, says she met Yonni on a training course five years ago and he was PLANNING on leaving Marta for her . . . but then the mine collapsed. Quote, "We are in love. I'll wait for him." (The Sun)


VIAGRA IS LEGALLY REQUIRED TO WARN YOU ABOUT THE WHOLE "FOUR HOUR ENGORGEMENT" THING:

We all know those Viagra and Cialis ads that say, "If you have an erection that lasts more than four hours, call a doctor." And we all know the HI-LARIOUS joke guys always make after one: "If I have a four-hour erection, I'm calling EVERYBODY." --Well . . . it turns out that four-hour thing isn't just in there as a marketing tool to make guys think they're going to get these nonstop, unsinkable engorgements. The companies are actually required BY LAW to have that warning in there. --The FDA makes it one of the mandatory warnings for ED drugs because four hours of stiffness could actually be a sign that the guy's blood flow has screwed up . . . and without help, he could suffer PERMANENT tissue damage down below. (AOL Health)




THE AVERAGE MAN WASTES $3,000 IN GAS IN HIS LIFETIME BY NOT ASKING FOR DIRECTIONS:

I thought that old stereotype that men never ask for directions was obsolete . . . with GPS, we don't really have to ask gas station attendants and random homeless people for directions anymore, we just have a computer voice tell us what to do. --Apparently, we're not QUITE there yet. GPS isn't popular enough to totally eliminate people getting lost . . . and men are STILL completely unwilling to ask for directions. --A survey by a British insurance company called Shelias' Wheels found that the average man drives around lost for 276 miles every YEAR. And, over the course of his lifetime, he wastes $3,000 in gas by refusing to ask for directions. --The survey found that 74% of women will happily ask for directions when they're lost, versus just 30% of men. Not only that, but 10% of men say that they will NEVER, EVER ask for directions, regardless of how lost they get.
--40% of men say that if they do give in and ask a stranger for directions, sometimes they ignore those directions and just keep on driving anyway.
--41% of men say they've lied about knowing where they were going when they were lost, versus just 26% of women.
(The Telegraph)


A WOMAN GIVES BIRTH ON THE DRIVE TO THE HOSPITAL . . . FOR THE SECOND TIME IN FOUR YEARS:

Little piece of advice going out to Christina Schuler of Bethel, Ohio: Next time you're pregnant and you feel like the baby might be coming . . . maybe leave for the hospital 10 to 15 minutes earlier. --On Tuesday, Christina gave birth in her husband's pickup truck on the way to the hospital. And that's the SECOND time she's popped out a baby on the way to the hospital in the last four years. --Back in December of 2006, she gave birth to her son Ethan on the drive. --On Tuesday, she gave birth to another son, who hasn't been named yet. He was eight pounds, 11 ounces, and healthy. --Both times, Christina says she went through labor EXTREMELY quickly . . . the second time was even faster than the first. --The hospital is about 40 minutes from her house, and they ALMOST made it . . . this baby was born when they were less than a mile away. (CBS 12 - Cincinnati)
(--Here's a quick video that shows Christina, her husband Nathan, and their new baby . . .)
http://www.local12.com/mostpopular/story/Clermont-County-Mom-Gives-Birth-in-Car-For-2nd/OjLZvXgYDkuw34HZtrCFEA.cspx?articleID=48924


FOLLOW-UP: THE WOMAN WHOSE CAR BROKE A MAN'S 39-STORY FALL AND SAVED HIS LIFE . . . IS DEVASTATED THAT HER CAR IS RUINED:

Yesterday, we told you about 22-year-old Thomas McGill of Manhattan. He's the guy who allegedly tried to commit suicide by jumping off a 39-STORY high rise . . . but ended up crashing through a car on the street and SURVIVING. --Well . . . that car was a 2008 Dodge Charger that belonged to 42-year-old Maria McCormack from Old Bridge, New Jersey. On Tuesday morning, she let her husband Tom drive it into New York City to go to his construction job. --And she's MAD. Because, sure, she saved a guy's life . . . but she LOVED that car. --Quote, "I miss it. It's my baby. I want to meet [Thomas] and say, 'Why? Why my car out of all the cars in the city?' I've had other cars, but I really loved this car." --She also says she JUST spent hundreds of dollars fixing the rear brakes, just got an oil change, and just filled it with gas. She said, quote, "I was going to get the front brakes done, but thank God I had a migraine." --The car was basically destroyed by Thomas's fall . . . at one point he was falling at more than 126 miles-per-hour . . . and Maria's insurance company is going to rule it a total loss. --Maria's husband Guy McCormack was a bit more gracious about things. He's going to pay the $500 insurance deductible. And, quote, "Geico said I could sue [Thomas] but I'm not going to do that. He has enough to worry about." --Thomas is still in the hospital. On Tuesday he had rods inserted in both legs, and on Wednesday he had operations on his groin and chest to relieve clotting. (New York Post)


THE POPULAR HALLOWEEN COSTUMES THIS YEAR INCLUDE LADY GAGA, "JERSEY SHORE" AND "AVATAR":

It's already September third, so we might as well start focusing on Halloween, right? At least until all the stores start stocking Christmas stuff in two weeks. --According to a survey of Halloween costume store owners, these are the six hot costumes for this year. (--So, uh, get them and be just like everyone else?)

#1.) The cast of "Jersey Shore", especially SNOOKI, THE SITUATION and PAULY D. Stores are selling wigs and muscle suits to help you pull off the looks.

#2.) LADY GAGA.

#3.) Former Illinois governor ROD BLAGOJEVICH. A wig that's modeled after his terrible hair is a big seller right now.

#4.) Characters from "Avatar".

#5.) Characters from "Alice in Wonderland".

#6.) Characters from "Twilight".

(Chicago Sun-Times)


WHO'S THE HIGHEST-PAID ATHLETE EVER . . . JORDAN? TIGER? OR A SECOND CENTURY ROMAN CHARIOT RACER?

LEBRON JAMES has said several times he wants to be the first billionaire athlete. Even though that's probably not going to happen now that he's a sidekick, even if he does hit 10 figures, he still wouldn't be CLOSE to the richest athlete of all time. --Peter Struck is an associate professor of classical studies at the University of Pennsylvania, and he says he's figured out the richest athlete ever. And it's not TIGER WOODS, MICHAEL JORDAN . . . or anyone you've ever heard of. --No, the richest athlete ever is . . . a Roman chariot racer named Gaius Appuleius Diocles. (--That would be "GUY-us Ah-POO-lee-us DIE-ah-klees".) --Between 122 and 164 A.D., Gaius was the best charioteer in the world. Ancient records have shown that his career winnings . . . measured in ancient Roman coins . . . comes to 35,863,120 sesterces (--SESS-turr-seez.) --Struck says, quote, "By today's standards that . . . would cash out to about $15 BILLION." --It would've been enough money to provide grain to the entire population of Rome for a full year, or fund the gigantic Roman Army for more than two months. --Earlier this year, "Forbes" claimed that Tiger Woods was the first athlete to make $1 BILLION, but he denied that he's made that much. (--I'm sure his pending divorce had nothing to do with the denial.)
(Discovery News)


NAZZY’S SILLY VIDEOS OF THE DAY

#1.) THE DOUBLE RAINBOW GUY IS MICROSOFT'S NEWEST PITCHMAN:

The "Double Rainbow" guy has sold out. Paul "Bear" Vasquez . . . who said he'd never try to profit off the video . . . is now appearing in two online ads for Microsoft. --The first ad sort of recreates the original video of Bear staring at two rainbows side-by-side. Then he uses a Windows program to fit both rainbows into one photo. The second ad is just a lame interview.
(--Search for "double rainbow Microsoft ads.")
http://www.urlesque.com/2010/09/02/double-rainbow-microsoft-ad/?icid=mainaimdl8sec3_lnk1168031


#2.) A FOOTBALL PLAYER ON A MOPED HIT A TRUCK HEAD-ON:

On Monday, a University of Iowa offensive lineman named Josh Koeppel was driving through an intersection on his moped, and a truck hit him HEAD-ON. A police car dash-cam caught it all on video. Luckily, Koeppel only had cuts and bruises.
(--Search for "Josh Koeppel accident video." It happens at :05.)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rOuvW8rMoGo

#3.) THE GOVERNOR OF ARIZONA FROZE-UP DURING A DEBATE:

Arizona Governor JAN BREWER froze up during a live televised debate on Wednesday. She later said it was, quote, "The longest 16 seconds of my life."
(--Search for "Jan Brewer opening statement train wreck." She freezes up at :34.)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xUPKKbmWMZ8

#4.) HERE'S SOMETHING THEY WON'T LET YOU DO AT THE AIRPORT:

When you go through security at the airport, you walk through the metal detector, and your carry-on bags go through the X-ray. But there's a new video online of a GUY going through the X-ray . . . and it shows his x-rayed body on the monitor.
--He's not at an airport though. It looks more like he's in the lobby of some high-security building that has a REALLY COOL SECURITY GUARD.
(--Search for "guy goes through airport x-ray machine." He does it at :17.)
http://www.liveleak.com/view?i=a24_1283373712


#5.) A GUY GOT HUGH JACKMAN TO APPEAR IN A VIDEO BIRTHDAY CARD FOR HIS WIFE:

It's time for our 'Most-Touching Video of the Day.' No, not that kind of 'touching.' A guy in Australia who's battling cancer made a birthday video for his wife . . . and somehow he got HUGH JACKMAN and the Prime Minister of New Zealand to appear in it.
(--Search for "Kristian Anderson Hugh Jackman birthday video." Hugh Jackman appears at 1:39, just for a few seconds.)
http://www.news.com.au/entertainment/celebrity/hugh-jackman-nz-pm-star-in-man-with-cancers-video-gift-for-wife/story-e6frfmqi-1225913299891


#6.) A PARAPLEGIC DAREDEVIL LANDED THE FIRST EVER DOUBLE-BACKFLIP IN A WHEELCHAIR:

Last week, an 18-year-old named Aaron Fotheringham . . . who was born with spina bifida . . . became the first person in history to land a double-backflip in a WHEELCHAIR.
(--Search for "first double-backflip wheelchair." He does it at 2:08.)
http://www.asylum.com/2010/09/02/paraplegic-daredevil-completes-first-double-backflip-in-a-wheelc/?icid=mainmaindl4sec3_lnk1168036


THREE REASONS YOU AREN'T DATING SMARTER WOMEN:

Okay guys: If the women you attract tend to be LESS-THAN-BRILLIANT, and you're ready for a girl you can introduce to your parents . . . here's a list from "COED Magazine" of three reasons you aren't dating smarter women . . .

#1.) YOU WEAR TOO MUCH COLOGNE. The same goes for too much body spray and too much hair gel. Smart women don't like it . . . drunk GIRLS do.

#2.) YOU HAVE THE INTERESTS OF A 10-YEAR-OLD BOY. You can't just talk about sports and how much you love "Family Guy". You have to talk about more sophisticated things SHE'LL be interested in. --When in doubt, music and movies are good topics to fall back on. And let's face it: If you're having a hard time coming up with your own sophisticated interests, maybe you shouldn't be gunning for smart women. I'm just sayin'. --Which brings me to: Cultivate your OWN sophisticated interests. Try turning off the TV . . . and reading.

#3.) YOU ONLY HANG OUT IN BARS. This isn't a hard-and-fast rule, but generally speaking . . . SMART women hang out everywhere BUT bars. --And smart girls that DO go to bars don't usually stay there until closing time. The later it gets, the lower the collective I.Q. becomes. (COEDMagazine.com)


CHECK OUT SIX FANTASY FOOTBALL RULES YOU CAN APPLY TO DATING:

It's the end of summer, which means all you fantasy football geeks are preparing for your annual drafts. But according to AskMen.com, the rules of fantasy football can also apply to dating. Check out six examples . . .

#1.) HAVE A DEEP BENCH. If you want to have any success in fantasy football, you need at least TWO star running backs, right? Well, having a deep bench is just as important in dating. --Unless you're in a committed relationship, it's a good idea to casually date a few people. It'll give you a better idea of your options, and if one of your dates falls through, your week isn't totally shot.

#2.) REVIEW THEIR RECENT PERFORMANCE. When prepping for your fantasy football draft, you've always got to check out last season's performance stats. Well, take that same idea and check out a woman's past relationship stats too. --If she has a history of bad breakups, or she's cheated on someone, you'll know ahead of time what you're getting yourself into.



#3.) DON'T COUNT ON COMEBACKS. When you're drafting a team, you never bank on the players who were good four years ago to make a big comeback. --Same thing with relationships: Don't keep trying to fix past relationships. Once it's over, move on.

#4.) DO YOUR RESEARCH. Before picking a player, you have to think about all the different factors that might affect his season. You wouldn't draft someone just because they play for your favorite team, or because your buddy says he's golden. --In the dating world, think of a first date like your scouting opportunity: How does her personality mesh with yours? What are her goals? Does she like football? When you do some research, the likelihood of a successful relationship increases dramatically.

#5.) DON'T REACH. There's always the impatient guy in the fantasy draft who goes for an entire defense before picking up a number 2 receiver. But he's reaching. --In dating terms, reaching means going after a girl who doesn't meet your standards. Or going for someone WAY out of your league. --So don't get involved with someone just for the sake of being in a relationship, and don't waste your time on women you KNOW you have no future with.

#6.) AVOID THE SEXY PICK. Every year there are a few picks that everybody's talking up. And on draft day, people chase after the overhyped players. But that means YOU can concentrate on drafting the quality talent. --Here's how to apply this one to dating: Say you spot a hot girl at a bar or in a club, but she already has two or three guys talking her up and buying her drinks. The smart thing is to move on. Chasing the sexy pick is usually more hassle than it's worth. (Ask Men)


DOG DAY CAMP

Day camp isn’t just for kids. Elena Sweet runs a camp for the four-legged set in Miami called Totally Dog. Her husband, Jeremy, drives the doggie bus to pick up the tail-wagging campers. Owners pay about $45 for a day of doggie fun, including dips in a bone-shaped wading pool. Kenny Reich says his three pooches go right to sleep when they get home. He adds it’s a sure sign they had a great time at camp.



SITE FOR SORE EYES:

http://thesocialnetwork-movie.com

Columbia Pictures has launched a new official website for their new movie “The Social Network.” The movie about the founding of Facebook is scheduled to be released on October 1st. On the site, which is themed a little bit like Facebook itself, you can view photos of different scenes in the movie, read the latest news, and watch the new trailers as they are released. The movie stars Jesse Eisenberg (who plays Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg), Justin Timberlake, Rashida Jones, Rooney Mara and Andrew Garfield.




Reemployed, Overqualified And Unsatisfied

Workers who suffered unemployment during Great Recession are, on average, less satisfied with their new jobs than workers who didn’t. They are more likely to consider themselves over-qualified for their current position, according to a recent Pew survey. An estimated 26% (or 36 million) of the 139 million currently employed workers in the United States suffered at least one spell of unemployment during the Great Recession that began in December 2007. These “reemployed workers” have a complicated mix of attitudes about their new job:

· Only 38% of the reemployed said they are being paid more now than at their former job and just 28% said their current benefits are better. At the same time, however, 43% said their new job is better than their old one – perhaps just relieved at being back at work.
· 53% of those who were out of work for less than six months said their current job is better than their old one compared with 36% of those who were unemployed six months or longer.
· Overall, nearly eight-in-ten reemployed workers say they are satisfied with their current job. But the job satisfaction share is even higher (89%) among workers who did not suffer unemployment.
· The reemployed are more likely to feel overqualified for their current position than those who did not lose a job (54% vs. 36%).



E-Mail Taking Up Free Time

The 9-to-5 workday is dead. And so are vacations, sick days, and weekend relaxation, according to a new study from Outlook add-in maker Xobni. According to the company, 72% of Americans check e-mail outside of regular business hours – and 42% check their e-mail on sick days! There is a gender divide when it comes to e-mail – 65% of men check their e-mail outside of work hours, compared with 51% of women. Other findings:

· 27% of workers check their e-mail when they’re off-duty because they feel that “they are expected to provide quick responses, even outside regular business hours.”
· 37% said that they don’t want to miss an important e-mail.
· 19% check and respond to e-mails while in bed. People between the ages of 18 and 34 are twice as likely to check e-mail in bed as those between the ages of 35 and 54.
· 50% of workers check their e-mail while on vacation.

For those overwhelmed by e-mail, Google has unveiled Priority Inbox, a Gmail feature that allows users to separate e-mail into “important and unread,” “starred,” and “everything else” to help tame the overload

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