Thursday, November 18, 2010


Eva Longoria Has Filed for Divorce:

NOW it's happening: EVA LONGORIA filed for divorce yesterday from TONY PARKER. --The only reason she gives in her divorce papers is the usual "irreconcilable differences". But numerous sources say Tony cheated with the wife of a former teammate on the San Antonio Spurs. --The woman in question is Erin Barry . . . who's in the process of divorcing husband BRENT BARRY. He was on the Spurs with Tony from 2004 to 2008. Barry was waived by the Houston Rockets in 2009, and now works as a broadcaster. --MARIO LOPEZ is one of those sources claiming Tony's a cheater. Mario is good friends with Eva and he says the marriage imploded a few weeks ago, when Eva found HUNDREDS of text messages from Erin. --He also says that Tony cheated on Eva once early in the marriage, and then remained in contact with THAT woman on Facebook. --He adds, quote, "She is devastated, she wants us to know that. But she's strong." --Now, there are some people who say Tony and Erin did NOT have a physical relationship . . . which we'll deal with later. --Eva dropped the following statement on Twitter . . . quote, "It is with great sadness that after 7 years together, Tony and I have decided to divorce. We love each other deeply and pray for each other's happiness." --Eva is asking for spousal support . . . and she also notes that there's a prenup. She didn't mention any details, though. --This is the second marriage to go bust for Eva. She was married to "General Hospital" star TYLER CHRISTOPHER from 2002 to 2004. She and Tony got married on July 7th, 2007 . . . or, 7/7/07. (--Lucky sevens! Or not.) --Just a few months ago, Eva and Tony celebrated their third anniversary with an Adriatic cruise and vacation with friends. (--Tony is 28 . . . Eva is 35.)

"Glee" Star Matthew Morrison Was a Virgin Until He Turned 21:

MATTHEW MORRISON . . . who plays the teacher, Will Schuester, on "Glee" . . . tells "Details" magazine that he was a virgin until the age of 21. --But once he discovered the joy of making the Beast with Two Backs, he did some serious catching up. --After college, Morrison ended up on Broadway . . . where he was one of a small minority of STRAIGHT MEN. --He says, quote, "There was so much opportunity. There were all these beautiful, beautiful dancers . . . I definitely hooked up with a lot of girls. It was exciting. Very joyous and free." --But Morrison still has trouble thinking of himself as a sex symbol . . . quote, "I'm not comfortable with the idea of my sex appeal, but I know in my job I have to use it. --"I wish I could say I got to this point in my career based on my talent, but I don't think that's true."

Ryan Reynolds Is "People" Magazine's Sexiest Man Alive:

"People" magazine drops its Sexiest Man Alive issue this week. And this year's winner is . . . RYAN REYNOLDS. --Despite the honor, Ryan doesn't necessarily feel sexy. At 6-foot-2, he says, quote, "My body naturally wants to look like Dick Van Dyke. When I stop training, I turn into a skin-colored whisper." --Not that he doesn't plan on milking it . . . not only with his wife SCARLETT JOHANSSON, but with anyone else he can brag to. He says, quote, "Now it's going to be, 'Sexiest man, take out the garbage.' That does sound better. --"The most difficult part is going to be organically working this title into a conversation with random strangers." --Last year's top dog, JOHNNY DEPP, was voted Sexiest Man of All Time in a poll on --And VIN DIESEL was named Sexiest Man Alive on Facebook . . . in a five-way online poll that also included Enrique Iglesias, Pauly D from "Jersey Shore", Chad Ochocinco and the Old Spice Guy, Isaiah Mustafa.

Here Are Some of "People" Magazine's Other Sexiest Men Alive:

Here are some of the other studs who made it into the Sexiest Man Alive issue . . .

--Jon Hamm

--George Clooney

--Robert Pattinson

--Kellan Lutz

--Robert Downey Jr.

--Bradley Cooper

--Jake Gyllenhaal

--"Glee" star Matthew Morrison

--Hugh Jackman

--Justin Timberlake

--Patrick Dempsey

--"Community" star Joel McHale

--Hugh Laurie

(--Check out tons more beefcake from the issue on

Rihanna Says She Wasn't Thinking When She Posed for Pictures with Kids While Wearing an "(Eff) You" Necklace:

RIHANNA has explained why she posed for a picture with those kids while wearing an "(Eff) You" necklace. Basically, it sounds like it was just an oversight. --She says, quote, "I never tell kids no when it comes to pictures or autographs. The last thing I'm thinking about is my necklace."

Tiger Woods Is On Twitter:

TIGER WOODS has officially joined Twitter. So far, all he's done is invited people to check out his website and his Facebook page . . . and post the following two messages . . . --"What's up everyone. Finally decided to try out twitter!" --"Yep, it's me. I think I like this twitter thing. You guys are awesome. Thanks for all the love." (--Here's the address . . .)

Bill Nye "The Science Guy" Collapsed During a Speech Tuesday Night:

BILL NYE . . . you know, "The Science Guy" . . . collapsed during a speech at the University of Southern California on Tuesday night. --He was speaking in front of several hundred people when he went down right in the middle of a sentence. --He came to about 10 seconds later. An audience member says, quote, "He popped back up with much gusto and asked everybody how long he was out for and went on with a story about how a similar thing happened to him that morning." --But that wasn't the end of it. Nye started slurring his words and stumbled against his laptop . . . and was eventually removed from the stage. --His rep issued a statement later, saying, quote, "Bill Nye is feeling much better after a good night's rest. He says he pushed himself too hard after a long day of an early satellite media tour combined with a late night speech."

Here's Video of Oksana Grigorieva Describing How Mel Gibson Allegedly Assaulted Her:

OKSANA GRIGORIEVA'S appearance on "Larry King Live" aired last night . . . and Oksana described the beating she allegedly received from MEL GIBSON in detail. --She said, quote, "Mel actually assaulted me whilst I was holding the baby in my arms . . . and I ran into my son's bedroom and told him to hide because Mel is crazy, you know, he's getting really violent . . . --"I was standing in the middle of the room with the baby like a mother protecting her cubs . . . as Mel proceeded into the room and struck me twice in the mouth . . . in front of my boy." --She added, quote, "He hit me and choked me in front of my son and then brandished a gun at me."
(--Here's video . . .)

Bristol Palin Has Apologized for the Way She and Her Sister Acted on Facebook:

BRISTOL PALIN has apologized for the language that she and her little sister WILLOW used during a FLAME WAR the other day on Facebook. --As you may recall, some guy that Bristol apparently knew from high school was making fun of the family's new reality show, "Sarah Palin's Alaska". --That touched off a battle between Bristol, Willow and several others . . . during which Willow called the guy who started the war "gay" . . . and that other gay slur that starts with the letter "F". --Bristol, meanwhile, told the guy, quote, "You're running your mouth just to talk (smack)." --So yesterday, Bristol went back to Facebook and posted the following message . . . quote, "Willow and I shouldn't have reacted to negative comments about our family. We apologize. --"On a nicer note, thank you for supporting the great competition in 'Dancing with the Stars'!" --Later, she posted this message . . . quote, "Thank you supporters who continue to support. The haters are already pulling out all the stops this week to destroy." --Willow, meanwhile, no longer has a Facebook account. (--There's no word whose idea it was to delete it.)

Gay Tea Partiers Aren't Mad at Willow Palin:

A group of gay Republicans . . . many of whom are Tea Party members . . . are NOT calling WILLOW PALIN on the carpet for using gay slurs on Facebook. --In fact, they think the media attention she's getting over this is just part of the Liberal Machine's attempt to bring SARAH PALIN down. --A rep for says, quote, "The slur used here is one you could hear on the streets of West Hollywood or Chelsea every day of the week. --"Apparently, it's only a homophobic slur when it comes from the daughter of a conservative female leader. Make no mistake; this is all about destroying Sarah Palin by any means necessary."

"Paranormal Activity 3" Is Coming Next October:

"Paranormal Activity" was a good movie. "Paranormal Activity 2" was creepy . . . and although some people think it was a little contrived, it still made some decent bank. --And so, not surprisingly, "Paranormal Activity 3" is in the works . . . and it's due out next October.

Some "Harry Potter" Footage Leaked Online Tuesday Morning:

The first 36 minutes of "Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows - Part 1" leaked online Tuesday morning. If you didn't know that, then you already missed it. --Not surprisingly, "Deathly Hallows" is the most searched-for movie on the various torrent sites, where people download movies for free . . . illegally, of course. --As far as we know, this was the only leak . . . and there's no word how many people downloaded it before Warner Brothers got it removed. --"Deathly Hallows" opens TONIGHT at midnight on 3,700 screens around the country. Tomorrow night, it'll be on more than 9,000 screens in over 4,000 theaters. --Ticket sales are already through the roof at online sellers like (--On a related note, tourists and "Harry Potter" fans are reportedly flocking to a graveyard in Israel, to see a tombstone with the name HARRY POTTER on it.) (--This particular Harry Potter was a British soldier who was killed in Palestine in 1939.) (--You can read more about it here . . .)

"American Idol" Has Revealed More of the Changes That Are Coming This Season:

"American Idol" boss Nigel Lythgoe has revealed more of the changes that are coming to "Idol" this season. --Most notably, there will not be a Top 24 this year. Instead, it sounds like the middle rounds will be beefed up . . . and then they'll skip directly to the Top 12. --Nigel tells "TV Guide", quote, "I didn't think [the Top 24] were very good, I was bored with them by the time they got there." --He didn't elaborate much on what would be added to replace that round, but he did say there would be new challenges . . . such as "making a music video, and working with a band and dancers [to create] an awards show-style performance." --By the way, Nigel says Randy has been ROCKIN' HIS DAWG in the auditions to make up for the absence of SIMON COWELL. He says, quote, "Randy is pulling his weight. He really has stepped up. He's essentially come out of himself." (--Randy last "came out of himself" in 2003 . . . when he lost 114 pounds following gastric bypass surgery.)

Dina Lohan Is Upset with "Glee" for Mocking Lindsay Lohan:

LINDSAY LOHAN'S mom DINA is upset with "Glee" for mocking Lindsay on Tuesday's episode . . . and she's considering a LAWSUIT over it. --On the show, guest star GWYNETH PALTROW was playing a Spanish teacher, whose lesson included this comment: Quote, "Lindsay Lohan is totally crazy, right? How many times has Lindsay Lohan been to rehab? --"Five times! Five. Please get into groups and discuss how many times Lindsay Lohan has been in rehab." The comment was made in Spanish with English subtitles. (--You can watch a clip of that scene, here.) (--Actually, "Glee" misspelled Lindsay in one of the subtitles. They spelled her name "LINDSEY" with an E . . . but that isn't what has Dina riled up.) --Dina told, quote, "Our lawyers are sending a letter to 'Glee'." She's apparently arguing that the show defamed Lindsay.

Details on the Post-Super Bowl Episode of "Glee":

"Entertainment Weekly" has some details on the "Glee" episode that will get this year's coveted post-Super Bowl timeslot. (--It's coveted because you could put a random repeat of "Wings" in there and have 50 million people watching it.) --There has been some talk that they might do a MICHAEL JACKSON or BRUCE SPRINGSTEEN "tribute" episode . . . but apparently that's not the case. Instead it'll be a regular "Glee" episode with a "sports theme." --That being said, the big song will be a mash-up of Michael Jackson's "Thriller" and another song that hasn't been chosen yet. The cast will also perform songs by the Black Eyed Peas, Lady Antebellum, and Katy Perry. --The "sports theme" will involve a football championship game . . . and the cheerleading team's regionals competition. --Sounds pretty typical, right? Yes . . . --Except "Entertainment Weekly" adds that it will be, quote, "the most expensive [episode] in 'Glee' history . . . and likely one of television's priciest episodes ever." (???) (--Unfortunately, we have NO CLUE what that's all about.
(--For what it's worth, earlier this year, the "New York Post" reported that HBO blew $50 MILLION on the pilot episode of "Boardwalk Empire". So there's that.)

Pierce Brosnan Has a TV Show in the Works:

Former James Bond PIERCE BROSNAN is developing a new TV show. --It's a drama about an international private investigator who's "called in to help solve homicides, abductions, financial schemes and other crimes anywhere in the world." It doesn't have a title or a network yet. reports that Pierce will serve as an executive producer . . . and will play a role on the show, but he won't be the main star. (--Pierce starred on the '80s detective show "Remington Steele". He played a former thief, who ended up working alongside private detective Laura Holt, who was played by Stephanie Zimbalist.)

Thursday TV Reminders: (--Check your local listings.)

--"A Charlie Brown Thanksgiving" . . . 8:00 to 9:00 P.M. on ABC.

--"Bones" . . . 8:00 to 9:00 P.M. on Fox. (--Wayne Knight, who played Newman on "Seinfeld", guest stars as an eccentric candy mogul who becomes a murder suspect after human remains are found in the world's largest chocolate bar.)

--"The Office" . . . 9:00 to 9:30 P.M. on NBC. (--Dwight organizes a hay festival.)

--"Grey's Anatomy" . . . 9:00 to 10:00 P.M. on ABC. (--Derek and his fellow doctors cut loose to celebrate his clinical-trial grant, which leaves Meredith and Alex on their own to care for a 9-year-old patient with an overbearing mother.)

--"The Mentalist" . . . 10:00 to 11:00 P.M. on CBS. (--Simon Baker directs this episode involving a triple homicide.) --"Star Trek" fans will also recognize tonight's guests as Trip and Dr. Phlox from "Enterprise". They're playing a redneck cop and a psychic. If you need Trekkie trivia, the actors' names are Connor Trinneer and John Billingsley.)

--"Pawn Queens" [SERIES Premiere] . . . 10:00 to 11:00 P.M. on TLC. (--A new series about the owners of a Chicago pawn shop that caters to women.)

Bret Michaels Told His Fans That He's Touring with Motley Crue . . . But Tommy Lee Says It's Not Happening:

BRET MICHAELS is apparently trying to coerce MOTLEY CRUE into touring with POISON . . . by pretending that it's already happening. --At a recent show in Ontario, Canada, Bret announced to the crowd that he'd be returning next year when the Poison / Motley Crue tour rolled through town. That's awesome . . . except that it's not happening. --When fans asked Crue drummer TOMMY LEE about it on Twitter, he simply responded, quote, "NO!" . . . and Motley Crue's management added that Bret is just, quote, "trying to will it" into happening. --Bret later admitted that he just made it up. (???) --He told "People" magazine, quote, "[It's] simply a pipe dream. [It] would be an incredible night of rock for the fans. […] Oh well, you can't blame me for trying to put together what I thought would be a great tour for the fans." --Oddly enough, Motley Crue is touring next year . . . and since it's their 30th anniversary tour, they're allowing fans to vote for bands they'd also like to see on the tour. (--They say it's happening at, but we couldn't find it.) --Crue's management said, quote, "Motley will listen to the fans, not to guys trying to book a tour through the media." (--It's unclear if they'd still "listen to the fans" if they voted to have Poison on the tour.) --In another strange coincidence, Poison will also be celebrating an anniversary next year. It'll be their 25th.

The Girl Who Sang "Justin Bieber's Girlfriend" Isn't Sure If She Wants to Be Justin Bieber's Girlfriend: (???)

We called it: 14-year-old Michaela Wallace . . . the girl who released a video of herself singing a catchy song called "Justin Bieber's Girlfriend" . . . either wanted to be Justin's girlfriend, or she was merely trying to capitalize on his fame. --And as it turns out, it was more of the latter. asked Michaela if she wanted to be Justin's girlfriend, and she said, quote, "Maybe, but it would be really crazy with everything he has going on and all those girls chasing after him." --Then she added, quote, "Being a singer has always been a big dream of mine. I'll keep writing and recording more music. […] I can't wait to see what happens next." (--Well played, Michaela.)

Taylor Swift Saves Perfumes and Colognes That Remind Her of Guys She Used to Date:

TAYLOR SWIFT doesn't just write about her past relationships . . . she continues to smell them. For real. She tells "Allure" magazine, quote, "Different smells bring different relationships to mind for me. --"I have always loved how fragrance can shape a memory, the way certain scents remind you of events and people that are imprinted in your thoughts." --But Taylor doesn't just rely on her memory. She says she used to keep a tray of perfume and cologne at her parents' house, so she could wear the scent of the guy she wanted to remember. --She explains, quote, "I'd put on Abercrombie 8 to remember when I was in ninth grade and had my first boyfriend, because he gave me that." --The downside to Taylor's, uh, quirk, is that certain scents also bring back some bad memories. She says, quote, "Dolce & Gabbana Light Blue is still a difficult one for me to smell."


TONY DANZA interrupted a FUNERAL last Thursday. It was a service for his longtime friend, true crime author PHILIP CARLO. Tony felt the priest giving the eulogy was talking too much about God and religion, and not enough about Carlo. So he went right up to the priest and told him so.

Families at a cinema in Revere, Massachusetts were expecting to see "Megamind" . . . but accidentally got the first few minutes of "Saw 3D" instead.

ANGELINA JOLIE'S first film as a director is still being bogged down by talk that the central love story is between a woman and the man who raped her. The movie was supposed to shoot for 10 days in Bosnia, but because of protests from women's groups, the shoot has been cut to three days. And Angelina herself will only make a brief appearance on the set.

TOM SHADYAC is the director of "Ace Ventura", "The Nutty Professor", "Liar Liar", "Patch Adams", "Bruce Almighty" and "Evan Almighty". And he currently lives in a TRAILER PARK and gives away most of his money.


Worst Bridesmaid Prank Ever? Bridesmaids Pushed a Bride into a Pool . . . But She Broke Her Neck and Became Paralyzed:

This might be one of the saddest stories we've ever seen . . . --Back in May, 25-year-old Rachelle Friedman of Virginia Beach, Virginia was a month away from getting married to her boyfriend of five years. So she and her friends were celebrating at her bachelorette party. --At the end of the night, they put on bathing suits and were joking around by a pool, when Rachelle's best friend pushed her in . . . at the shallow end. In a freak accident, Rachelle hit her head on the bottom. --She suffered a C6 spinal cord injury, leaving her completely paralyzed from the chest down. She can move her arms, but she still hasn't gotten back any feeling below her collarbone . . . not in her hands, feet, anywhere. --It gets worse. She and her boyfriend, Chris Chapman, had to call off the wedding. Because if they got married, their combined income would keep Rachelle from being able to qualify for Medicaid . . . which is paying Rachelle's huge medical bills. --Somehow, Rachelle says she's managing to stay positive . . . and she doesn't blame her friend for pushing her into the pool. --She says, quote, "I tell her all the time that I am at peace with what happened and she should be too." (ABC News)

The U.N. Decides One of the World's Most Significant Cultural Practices is . . . Oil Wrestling?

Look, I love watching two classy ladies WRESTLING IN HOT OIL as much as the next guy. Probably even more. But when I'm watching foxy oil wrestling, I NEVER think, "Now THIS is culture. JUST like going to a museum or the symphony." --Apparently when representatives from the U.N. see oil wrestling, that thought DOES cross their mind. --The United Nations Educational, Scientific and Cultural Organization . . . or UNESCO . . . just named 46 new practices to its list of "Intangible Cultural Heritage." They're all supposedly unique, proud traditions that show the best of what a culture has to offer. --And one of the 46 is . . . TURKISH OIL WRESTLING. --Now, of course this isn't QUITE the same as two women in their underwear at a redneck bar. Every year in Edirne, Turkey, trained and talented wrestlers compete in an oil wrestling festival that's steeped with traditions. But still . . . it's oil wrestling. --Other practices added to the list are more traditional, like French cuisine . . . Spanish Flamenco dancing . . . the Mediterranean diet of Spain, Greece, Italy, and Morocco . . . Persian rug weaving in Iran . . . and Chinese acupuncture. --No cultural practices from the U.S. were added to the list. In general, practices are only added if UNESCO believes they are fading and need safeguarding and preservation. There are 232 total practices on the list, and none are from the U.S. (UNESCO)

(--You can see the full list of 232 here . . .)

Black Friday is Starting Earlier This Year . . . Wal-Mart, Toys "R" Us, The Gap, and More Are Opening Well Before 5:00 A.M.:

Here's a GREAT excuse to eat Thanksgiving dinner with your family, then get the hell out before everyone starts pointing out each other's faults. Just say: "I'd love to stay, but I've GOT to get to Wal-Mart NOW to buy a $19 Blu-ray player." --Black Friday is starting earlier than ever this year . . . fewer and fewer retailers are waiting until 5:00 A.M. on the Friday after Thanksgiving to open their doors. --Wal-Mart has announced it will be starting its Black Friday sale at MIDNIGHT on Thanksgiving night. And they're not alone. Old Navy and The Gap are starting at midnight too. --Toys "R" Us is beating them by two hours . . . they'll open at 10:00 P.M. on Thanksgiving and start offering their deals. --Sears and Kmart are trying to get the jump on everyone . . . they'll be opening and offering their best sale offers at 6:00 A.M. on Thanksgiving morning. --For now, Target is still set to open at 4:00 A.M. on Black Friday, Best Buy is set to open at 5:00 A.M., and Costco isn't planning to join in until 9:00 A.M. --But there's a major price war going this holiday season, as these stores are desperately competing to grab your gift budget . . . however small it is in this economy. --So other stores could still respond and push up their Black Friday opening times, too. (Dayton Daily News)

Here Are Seven Things to Know about the New Airport Screening Process You'll Face This Holiday Season:

The TSA's new policies seem to have everyone kinda freaked out . . . body scanners, pat-downs, possible full frontal nudity. Here's what you should REALLY expect when you travel this holiday season.

#1.) If your airport has full-body scanners, you'll probably be scanned. So far, 68 U.S. airports have full-body scanners. They basically replace the metal detector you're used to walking through.

--Which means: If they've got scanners, you'll probably be scanned. (--You can see a list of the airports with scanners here. It's basically complete . . . and as you'll see, it has most of the major airports in the country . . .)

#2.) Can they see my junk when they scan me? Sort of. They'll get a fuzzy, gray-and-black look at the general outline of your body underneath your clothes.

--Your face will be blurred and the image is allegedly destroyed as soon as you're done. Some full body scans recently leaked, but those weren't from the TSA . . . they say they don't even have the ability to save the photos.

--Also, the image won't be broadcast to the entire security line . . . TSA officials in a back, private room will be examining it.

#3.) Can I refuse the screening? Yes, but if you do, you'll get a mandatory pat-down from a TSA officer of your gender. And it's a LEGIT pat-down . . . tops and sides of breasts, inner thighs, buttocks . . . those are all in play now.

#4.) Why do they have to touch me so intimately? This is all a reaction to the guy who tried to fly with a bomb in his underwear last Christmas.

#5.) How long do the pat-downs take? They take about two minutes. The body scanner takes about 30 seconds. But yes, prepare for longer lines while everyone gets used to the new procedures.

#6.) Do the scanners pose a radiation threat? No. You get somewhere between one-fiftieth and one-hundredth the radiation you'd get from a standard chest X-ray.

--A professor at Arizona State University says your odds of getting cancer from the scan are about one in 30 million . . . which, fittingly enough, are about the same odds that the plane you're on will get blown up by a terrorist.

#7.) If it's your lady time . . . uh . . . TSA will know. Here we go. The full body scans pick up everything under your clothes . . . including the various cotton-based products that women use during That Time.

--The TSA says their screeners are expected to use discretion . . . so hopefully they won't see a string that looks like a fuse and ask you to prove it's not dynamite.

(Time / Raw Story / MSNBC)

A Woman Calls In a Fake Bomb Threat on an Airplane . . . to Keep Her Daughter from Eloping:

You can get fined thousands of dollars these days just for standing up and walking around during the wrong time on an airplane. So imagine what kind of fine you'd get for THIS. --A 56-year-old woman in Yaroslavl, Russia called in a fake BOMB THREAT on an airplane yesterday . . . because her daughter was on the flight, about to ELOPE, and the mom wanted to stop the wedding. --The mother's name hasn't been released. --It gets even worse. When she called the Domodedovo Airport in Moscow to tell them about the fake bomb, she said her daughter on the plane was a SUICIDE BOMBER. --Airport officials stopped the plane and interrogated the daughter. Finally, when they figured out what was going on, she was cleared to fly and the plane took off. --The mother was arrested.(New York Daily News)

KFC is Awarding a $20,000 Scholarship to the High School Student Who Writes the Best . . . Tweet?

I remember back when trying to get college scholarships was a ton of work. You had to write SO MANY GOTT-DAMM essays just to get a few thousand bucks here and there. --Today's kids barely have to write a sentence. --Yesterday, KFC announced that they're going to be awarding a $20,000 college scholarship to the high school student who writes the best . . . TWEET. --$20,000 for 140 characters. That's life in 2010. --Companies that run contests like this on Twitter are doing it for the publicity. Unlike an essay that a kid would send to KFC, all of their Tweets are public, and all of the kids' Twitter friends and followers will see it. That's a ton of free marketing. --A KFC spokeswoman says the Tweets will be judged 40% on creativity, 30% on need, and 30% on drive. So see if your kid can figure out how to jam all that into 140 characters. (--Also, the Tweet will have to contain the tag #KFCScholar.) --If you take a quick look on Twitter, some kids are already entering the contest . . . but most of them just seem to be listing their high school activities or career goals. The winner will be announced on December 1st. (USA Today)
(--Check out the page here . . .)

You Know Who Has Gotten Richer During The Recession? The Members of Congress:

Hey, need something to be outraged about? While we've all lost our jobs and searched under the floor mats of the car to try to scrape together enough money for dinner, you know who's gotten richer? CONGRESS. --According to a watchdog group called the Center for Responsive Politics, between 2008 and 2009, the personal wealth of the members of Congress increased by more than 16%. --Also, 261 members of Congress . . . or more than half . . . are millionaires. About one in five are worth at least $10 MILLION, and eight are worth more than $100 MILLION. --To contrast this with regular Americans . . . between 2008 and 2009, the median household wealth in the U.S. dropped 3% to $50,221. Have a great day at work! (CNBC)


masturdating (verb) /mass turr day ting/ - going out by yourself to a place normally reserved for couples or groups. --Example: "I am going to the midnight opening of the new 'Harry Potter' alone tonight. What can I say, I love masturdating."

A Man in Wisconsin Shoots His TV and Gets into a 15-Hour Standoff with the Police . . . All Because He Hates Bristol Palin's Dancing?

At this point in the "Dancing with the Stars" season, yes, it's clear BRISTOL PALIN isn't going to end up as a professional dancer touring the world performing "Swan Lake". But is her dancing SO BAD that it makes you want to KILL YOURSELF? --For 66-year-old Steven Cowan of Town of Vermont, Wisconsin, the answer is a resounding YES. --On Monday night, Steven and his wife were at home watching "Dancing with the Stars". And after Bristol performed, Steven said he thought she was a bad dancer . . . and it made him FURIOUS. --So he grabbed one of his shotguns, SHOT THE TV, and then started threatening to kill himself . . . apparently feeling he was unable to live in a world where Bristol Palin could be allowed to dance so poorly on TV. Also, he'd been drinking. --Steven's wife called the police. They arrived at the house and tried to get Steven to come outside, but he wouldn't. His wife tried to round up his guns to keep them away from him, but he pointed one at her and told her to leave them alone. --Finally she ran out of the house. And after a FIFTEEN-HOUR STANDOFF, Steven calmed down, his suicidal impulses faded, and he surrendered to the police outside. --He was arrested and charged with domestic disorderly conduct and second-degree reckless endangerment. (CBS 3 - Madison)

Unfortunate Stereotype Story #1: A Woman Pulls a Knife on Her Husband . . . When He Wouldn't Help Her Fix Her Weave:

On Saturday, 51-year-old Kaukauna Y. Gethers Rudolph of Lynn, Massachusetts was working on her big project of the day: Taking out her old WEAVE, dying her gray hair black, and then putting in the NEW hair piece she'd just bought on sale. --In case you don't know . . .. weavin' ain't easy. It's why women usually go to professionals. And as Kaukauna was struggling with her weave removal, she reached out to her 48-year-old husband Kenny Rudolph for help. --He was a little drunk and not being particularly helpful. They argued. And the argument ended when Kaukauna grabbed a 15-INCH KITCHEN KNIFE and started threatening Kenny. He called the police. --When the cops got there, Kaukauna told them HER side of the story . . . She asked Kenny to cook her some food, and he was drunk and refused to do it. So she went to cook, and that's why she had the knife. --She says she NEVER would've asked him for help with her weave, quote, "Men do not know how to do a woman's hair. Would you trust your husband to do your hair?" --When a cop reached to take the knife away from Kaukauna, she tried to hide it by shoving it down her shorts. She was arrested and charged with assault with a deadly weapon and resisting arrest. --Since the incident, she and Kenny have made up. And she's been wearing a wig . . . the new hair pieces that she'd bought for $3 each are still in their packages. (Boston Herald)

Unfortunate Stereotype Story #2: A Woman is Arrested for Assaulting Her Boyfriend with a Plate of Tamales:

As a rule of thumb, you REALLY shouldn't go around attacking people. But as an even MORE important rule of thumb . . . if you DO go around attacking people, try not to assault them AND simultaneously play up a stereotype like this. --30-year-old Adyan Sanchez of Bradenton, Florida was arrested over the weekend for allegedly assaulting her boyfriend with . . . a PLATE OF TAMALES. --Apparently, Adyan and her boyfriend were arguing. She says he called her a "[rhymes with witch]" in front of their one-year-old son . . . and she wasn't going to let him get away with that. --So she picked up a plate of tamales and threw the entire thing at him. --When the cops got there, the boyfriend had tamale sauce all over his pants. --Adyan was arrested and charged with misdemeanor battery. (The Smoking Gun)

A Four-Year-Old Calls 911 After His Mom Leaves Him Home Alone while She Goes Out for Beer:

On Sunday, a 911 operator in Deltona, Florida got a call from a four-year-old boy. Like a lot of four-year-olds, it wasn't always easy to get an answer out of him, but when the operator did, she was SHOCKED at his answers. --It turns out the kid's mother had left him home alone TWO HOURS earlier . . . and was still gone. He desperately wanted to talk to her but didn't know her number, so he called 911. --The call was traced and the police went to the house and found the boy, alone. Fortunately, he was okay. --And finally, three hours later . . . FIVE hours total after she'd left . . . his mom finally showed up. --She's 25-year-old Jocelyn Villot, and she told the police she'd gone to the doctor and then out to grab some BEER. She also claimed she'd left her son with his aunt . . . but the aunt told the police that wasn't true. --The cops tried to confirm her locations, but were only able to figure out that she went to a pharmacy around the corner from the house . . . where she tried to fill a prescription that didn't have a doctor's signature. --She was arrested and charged with child neglect without great harm. Her son was left in the care of some other family members. (Daytona Beach News-Journal)


When he was 19, Mark Zuckerberg set up a Friendster profile that said he preferred Asian girls and hated books:

A boy was allowed to join a high school field hockey team . . . and he's absolutely crushing the competition:

A paramedic revived an unconscious woman . . . and she punched him in the chest:

A runner at state cross country championship stopped to help his collapsed opponent cross the finish line:

A British hairdresser's nose collapsed . . . because he's been breathing in the tiny pieces of his clients' hair for years, and it caused an infection:


#2.) Here's Every "Secret Word" from "Pee-wee's Playhouse":

If you're a PEE-WEE HERMAN fan, here's something to pleasure yourself to: Someone went through all the old episodes of "Pee-wee's Playhouse" and edited together every "Secret Word". (--Search for "Pee-wee Secret Word")

#3.) The JetBlue Flight Attendant Is a Rapper Now?

Remember STEVEN SLATER? He's the JetBlue flight attendant who quit his job in August by grabbing a beer, opening the emergency exit, and jumping down the big rubber slide. And now he's released his own RAP VIDEO. (???) --It's actually a promotional thing for a smart phone app called Line2 that lets you text with your friends in mid-air. The product sounds kind of cool, but the rap is just lame. (--Search for "Steven Slater rap.") (--WARNING: This video includes the B-word.)

#4.) Someone Did a Hip-Hop Update of the "Alphabet Song":

A comedy group has updated the "Alphabet Song" and turned it into a hip-hop track . . . with profanity. (--Search for "Alphabet Song 2010 Fatawesome.") (--WARNING: This video includes the F-word.)

#5.) Here's America's Biggest "Harry Potter" Nerd . . . I Mean Fan: is trying to find the biggest Harry Potter fan in America . . . and I'm pretty sure they did. Contestants had to submit a video explaining why they're the biggest fan, and one guy did his entire video AS Harry Potter. --He stayed in character while showing off all his memorabilia and explaining that he has so much Harry Potter clothing, he can wear a new outfit every day for three months straight.
--And as if that wasn't enough, he also has J.K. ROWLING'S signature tattooed on his forearm. (--Search for "world's biggest Harry Potter fan video.")
Six Holiday Marketing Tricks, and Why You Can't Resist Them:

Every November, all the stores roll out 'special' deals designed to make us spend as much as possible during the holidays . . . like the sheeple we are. Here's a list of six marketing tricks, and why you can't resist them . . .

#1.) A Limit of Five Per Person. Setting a limit increases the chances you'll buy at least one. And if you were already planning to buy one, it increases the chances you'll buy FIVE.

--It works because we're naturally competitive, and setting a limit makes us feel like what we're buying is in high demand. But you're really just buying five of something the store is trying to get rid of.

#2.) 23% Off Instead of 25%. Odd numbers like 23% or 47% suggest that whatever you're buying has already been marked down at least once before . . . even if that's not really the case.

--It's the same reason a real estate broker lists a property at $284,700 instead of $285,000. It makes potential buyers assume that the seller already came down in price.

#3.) Reminders That a Sale Is About to End. On the last day of a recent 25% off sale at Old Navy, they sent customers an email that said, "Last chance. Hurry before the discounts drop."

--That day, the traffic on increased by more than 8%, and people stayed on the site for 6% longer than usual. That might not SOUND like a lot, but for a huge company like Old Navy, it's hundreds of thousands of dollars.

--The reason things like reminders and limited time offers work is because they play on your basic survival instinct to grab what's available before someone else does.

#4.) Warranties. The vast majority of people who buy them never end up using them, but companies know we're afraid to buy something expensive without some sort of insurance.

--That's why they'll offer you the two-year extended warranty, and not mention that the gadget you're buying already comes with a ONE-year warranty.

#5.) Advertising How Much You're Saving, Not How Much It Costs. Putting a sticker that says "$250 Off" on something that costs $500 makes people assume the item is actually worth $750.

--And the first thing that catches your attention is how much you'd be saving instead of how much you'd be spending.

#6.) Offering a Free Gift If You Spend Over a Certain Amount. Obviously, it makes you spend more, and the gift is usually something you'd never buy. But this one is hard for people to resist because it appeals to your inner child.

--Retailers know that buying gifts for other people makes you want to buy something for YOURSELF. And being able to say you got something for "free" eliminates all the guilt. (Smart Money)


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