Friday, January 28, 2011


Kate Hudson Thinks She's Having a Girl:

KATE HUDSON doesn't know if she's having a boy or a girl. But like a lot of women, she's got a hunch. --She says, quote, "It feels like a girl, but I don't know. [My son] Ryder thinks it's a girl." --Kate is also denying rumors that she and her baby-daddy, MATT BELLAMY of MUSE, are engaged . . . quote, "I don't like putting that sort of pressure on it, and I don't feel it necessary to get married."

Charlie Sheen Was Rushed to the Hospital Yesterday with Stomach Pains:

CHARLIE SHEEN was rushed to the hospital yesterday morning with severe abdominal pains. --We're not sure exactly what happened . . . but the word is that it happened after about 36 straight hours of partying at Charlie's house that included at least two porno stars and three other women. --The 911 call was made by Charlie's neighbors, Dr. Paul Nassif and Adrienne Maloof-Nassif from "The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills". Apparently, someone at Charlie's house had called them for medical advice. --Sources say Dr. Nassif told the 911 operator that Charlie was, quote, "not alert". --Charlie was transported to the hospital via ambulance at about 6:30 yesterday morning. As far as we know, he's okay now. --His parents, MARTIN SHEEN and JANET TEMPLETON, were with him yesterday . . . as was his ex-wife DENISE RICHARDS. --Charlie's other ex-wife, BROOKE MUELLER, did NOT go. She told reporters, quote, "I'm not going to the hospital, Charlie's doing good." --TMZ is reporting that Charlie didn't O.D. or anything like that. He has a hiatal hernia. --That's a condition that affects the upper part of the stomach and the esophagus. It causes acid reflux, and can also produce symptoms in the chest similar to those of a heart attack. --And a friend of his claims that he aggravated it by . . . LAUGHING TOO HARD while watching TV. --But there's no doubt that some partying was going on. Neighbors say they heard women outside Charlie's house singing RED HOT CHILI PEPPERS songs well into the morning. --And so-called "sources" say somebody showed up at some point in the evening with a BRIEFCASE FULL OF COCAINE. --TMZ says Charlie was snorting and SMOKING cocaine . . . and critiquing porn on his TV. (--Is that what he was laughing about? Because it couldn't have been "Two and a Half Men" that was cracking him up.) --A source says Charlie was watching smut with one of the porno stars at his house, and was asking her lots of technical questions about camera angles and such. She was reportedly, quote, "surprised by the depth of his knowledge." --When Charlie was wheeled out of his house yesterday morning, two young women were also seen leaving. --One of the mattress actresses who had been partying with Charlie was 22-year-old KACEY JORDAN. Wednesday afternoon, she Tweeted, quote, "It's officially 24 hours of drinking! Hehe." --She also Tweeted a picture of her CROTCH in a bikini bottom. --Kacey reportedly left the party Wednesday afternoon . . . so she missed yesterday morning's chaos. But later yesterday, she Tweeted, quote, "My phones are ringing off the hook! ugh!" --According to, Charlie promised Kacey a baby blue Bentley convertible on Wednesday afternoon.

Will This Latest Incident Finally Force Charlie Sheen Into Rehab?

Everybody's worried about CHARLIE SHEEN. CBS President Nina Tassler even said she had, quote, "a high level of concern" for him earlier this month. --And this latest incident may finally give his bosses the excuse they need to FORCE Charlie to go into rehab. --Rumor has it that the suits at Warner Brothers . . . which produces "Two and a Half Men" . . . have been waiting for just such an excuse. --It's been hard for them so far, because what Charlie does OFF the set never seems to affect his work. Even this time, his hospitalization hasn't shut down production because the show is on hiatus. --A source on the show says, quote, "They are all afraid Charlie will end up dead. It is literally day by day. If he did anything to delay production or put it in jeopardy, they'd shut it down and try to force him to go to rehab." --Meanwhile . . . Charlie, as usual, doesn't think he has a problem. In fact, a friend of his says it's not fair to say Charlie was on a bender over the last few days . . . because he's been partying like this for weeks. --The friend says, quote, "He says things like, 'Men like me don't die.'"

IT'S ON!!! Jenna Jameson Calls Chelsea Handler a "Dried Up Old Whore":

Legendary mattress actress JENNA JAMESON has a bone to pick with CHELSEA HANDLER. --It's because of something Chelsea said in a recent issue of "Glamour" magazine. --The adjective "raunchy" was brought up to describe Chelsea's humor . . . and she said, quote, "I don't like the word raunchy. I'm irreverent and I say things that a lot of people wouldn't say, and some of it probably isn't in the best taste. --"But when I hear the word raunchy, to me that describes Jenna Jameson. Look, I'm never going to please everybody." --That really ticked Jenna off, because she replied by calling Chelsea, quote, "a dried up old whore" on Twitter. --Then she added, quote, "Just cuz I say it like it is. Don't hate . . . She talks massive (crap). Ok, whatever...."

Natalie Portman Has a Politically-Correct, Eco-Friendly Engagement Ring:

NATALIE PORTMAN'S engagement ring is just like her: Politically-correct and eco-friendly. Her fiancé Benjamin Millepied, a dancer she met on the set of "Black Swan", designed it himself. --According to Jewelry designer Jamie Wolf, the ring is made of recycled platinum, and the diamonds are CONFLICT FREE. He says, quote, "We wanted everything about the ring to speak to things that are important to Natalie." (--Here's a picture of the ring. And here is an amusing video of Natalie Portman as a teenager in 1996, in her theater camp's production of "Cabaret".)


Kansas City Royal Gil Meche Retired and Gave Up a Guaranteed $12 Million . . . Because He Didn't Think He Deserved It:

If there was an actual HERO OF THE DAY trophy, I would hand it today to Kansas City Royals pitcher GIL MECHE. --Gil decided to RETIRE from the game instead of having shoulder surgery and getting busted down to relief pitcher. In doing so, he gave up the guaranteed $12 MILLION he would have made in the coming year. --And he did it because he doesn't think he would DESERVE the money if he wasn't playing his absolute best. --He says, quote, "When I signed my contract, my main goal was to earn it. Once I started to realize I wasn't earning my money, I felt bad. --"I was making a crazy amount of money for not even pitching. Honestly, I didn't feel like I deserved it. I didn't want to have those feelings again." --He added, quote, "This isn't about being a hero . . . that's not even close to what it's about. It's just me getting back to a point in my life where I'm comfortable. --"Making that amount of money from a team that's already given me over $40 million for my life and for my kids, it just wasn't the right thing to do."

This Week's New Movies Include Anthony Hopkins Fighting The Devil . . . and Jason Statham Killing Off Other Hitmen:

#1.) "The Rite" (PG-13)

Anthony Hopkins is an experienced exorcist who trains a skeptical seminary student, until he himself is possessed. An unknown actor named Colin O'Donoghue is the young exorcist trying to drive the Devil out of Anthony Hopkins. It's his first major role. (Trailer)
Official Site:

#2.) "The Mechanic" (R)

An action flick starring Jason Statham as an assassin looking for some major revenge after his mentor, Donald Sutherland, is murdered. Ben Foster plays the dead guy's son, who convinces Statham to teach him everything he knows. If you're a sci-fi fan, you might remember Foster as the dude with wings in the third "X-Men" movie. (Trailer)
Official Site:

"The Social Network" Is the Odds-On Favorite to Win Best Picture . . . And Colin Firth Is the Favorite to Win Best Actor:

"Access Hollywood" spoke to two top oddsmakers in Las Vegas, and they say that "The Social Network" is the favorite to win the Oscar for Best Picture. --They also have COLIN FIRTH winning Best Actor for "The King's Speech" and NATALIE PORTMAN winning Best Actress for "Black Swan". (--Speaking of the Oscars, somebody put together Lego scenes of the 10 Best Picture nominees. You can check them out here.) (--The "Toy Story 3" picture is kind of a cheat, because Woody, Buzz and the three-eyed alien are non-Lego toys. The only thing that's Lego is the toy box they're hiding in. Anybody could have done that.)

Check Out Some More Performances By "Idol" Hopeful Chris Medina:

If you enjoyed "American Idol" contestant CHRIS MEDINA, you should check out the past performance videos he has online. (--Chris auditioned at the end of Wednesday's show. He's the guy who's taking care of his fiancée because she was left brain damaged following a bad accident just two months before they were supposed to get married.) (--You can watch the audition, here . . . but be warned: It might make you weep.) -In one video, Chris performs an original song called "What Has Become of Me" on what would've been his wedding day. He wrote the song while his fiancée, Juliana, was still in the hospital. (--Listen to it, here.) --And there's another of Chris singing a song called "Chicago". It was done a few months before Juliana's accident, and she's sitting next to Chris in the video. (--Here's the link.) --Finally, there's a song called "Young Hearts" by Chris' band, THE ABLE BODY. It's unclear when it was recorded, but it was just uploaded last week. (--You can check it out, here.) --By the way, "Idol" rebounded in the ratings Wednesday. After the premiere drew 26.2 million viewers and the second episode dropped to 22.9 million, 25.2 million viewers tuned in for Wednesday's episode. (--The numbers from last night's show aren't out yet.)

Sanjaya Malakar Doesn't Think "American Idol" Should've Lowered Its Minimum Age to 15:

SANJAYA MALAKAR is not only watching "American Idol" this season, he's also sharing his thoughts on the contestants. (--And you thought ELLEN DEGENERES was unqualified to be a judge.) --After watching Wednesday's auditions in Milwaukee, Sanjaya said he was very impressed with the talent pool this year, but even though he liked some of the young kids, he has his doubts about the minimum age being lowered to 15 this season. --He said, quote, "It threw me off a little bit at first, because I was one of the young ones when I was on the show. I don't know if it's harder [when you're younger], but it's definitely difficult. --"The show's about projecting yourself, and I don't know anyone at 17, let alone 15, that really has a full grasp of who they are, and how to project it." (--And that my friends was best displayed in 2006, when Sanjaya himself auditioned for "American Idol" nine days after turning 17.) (--You can watch Sanjaya's full video blog at, here. He's actually rockin' NORMAL hair . . . and well, you can see why he went with the wild look on "Idol". He looks like a poor man's young ERIK ESTRADA.)

Ed O'Neill Has Craig T. Nelson's Greed to Thank for His Role on "Modern Family":

CRAIG T. NELSON was the first choice to play the role of Jay Pritchett on "Modern Family" . . . but when he turned it down, the part went to ED O'NEILL. --Craig ended up with a gig on NBC's "Parenthood" . . . but he says he did not CHOOSE "Parenthood" over "Modern Family", because he hadn't been offered the "Parenthood" role yet. So why did he turn down "Modern Family"? --Money. --He tells "Access Hollywood", quote, "I'm old enough to say it, I guess. [Money], that was it. I really wanted to do 'Modern Family' and I really liked the script and I liked the people. I just said, 'You know what? I've been doing this too long.' --"We're in the middle of a cutback here, ladies and gentlemen, in Hollywood and salaries have gone way, way down. I just felt disrespected to tell you the truth." --Craig adds that this time it worked out for everyone. He thinks he ended up with better role for him . . . while Ed O'Neill and "Modern Family' were a good match. (--Craig starred on "Coach" over almost the exact same period that Ed was starring on "Married with Children".)

Minka Kelly and Rachel Taylor Are in Line to Star on "Charlie's Angels":

It seems like ABC is FINALLY getting their new "Charlie's Angels" series off the ground . . . because they may have their three angels. says MINKA KELLY and Australian actress RACHAEL TAYLOR are "close" to signing on. -Minka is best known for her role on the show "Friday Night Lights" . . . and for dating New York Yankee DEREK JETER. Rachael was in the first "Transformers" movie. She played a hacker named Maggie. --The show has already locked in "General Hospital" star ANNIE Ilonzeh as the third angel. (--If you're familiar with "General Hospital", she plays Maya Ward.)

Steve Carell and Ricky Gervais Bumped Into Each Other on "The Office" Last Night:

RICKY GERVAIS . . . the star of the British "Office" . . . made his long-awaited appearance on the U.S. version last night, when he bumped into STEVE CARELL while coming out of the elevator. --They joked about accents, and got along really well. (--You can watch the clip, here.)
Friday TV Reminders:

--"Working Class" [SERIES Premiere] . . . 8:00 to 9:00 P.M. on CMT. (--Melissa Peterman, who was Barbara Jean on "Reba", plays a single mom who gets a job working with Ed Asner in a supermarket.)

--"Primetime: What Would You Do?" . . . 9:00 to 10:00 P.M. on ABC.

--"Survivor: Redemption Island Preview" . . . 9:00 to 10:00 P.M. on TV Guide Network. (--The 22nd season is previewed including some of the upcoming challenges the contestants will face.)

--"20/20" . . . 10:00 to 11:00 P.M. on ABC. (--Chris Cuomo examines the growing trend of homeless youths in America and the challenges of helping them.)

--"Friday Night Alright" . . . 11:00 to 11:30 P.M. on VH1. (--Kings of Leon, La Roux and Jason Derulo perform at the 2010 V Festival.)

--"Comedy Central Presents: Chelsea Peretti" . . . 11:00 to 11:30 P.M.

--"Comedy Central Presents: Sheng Wang" . . . 11:30 P.M. to Midnight.

Saturday TV Reminders:

--"Goodnight for Justice" . . . 8:00 to 10:00 P.M. on the Hallmark Movie Channel. (--"90210's" Luke Perry plays a guy who attempts to settle a decades-old vendetta against the person who killed his parents. It's directed by Jason Priestley.)

--"Austin City Limits" . . . 9:00 to 10:00 P.M. on PBS. (--Lyle Lovett and Bob Schneider perform.)

--"US Figure Skating Championships" . . . 9:00 to 11:00 P.M. on NBC.

--"Mega Python vs Gatoroid" . . . 9:00 to 11:00 P.M. on Syfy. (--Debbie Gibson and Tiffany have an '80s minx catfight in this flick about oversized reptiles that clash in the Everglades.)

--"Pit Boss" [2nd Season Premiere] . . . 10:00 to 11:00 P.M. on Animal Planet.

--"Nick Kroll: Thank You Very Cool" . . . 10:00 to 11:00 P.M. on Comedy Central. (--Comedian Nick Kroll performs.)

--"Kidnap & Rescue" [SERIES Premiere] . . . 10:00 to 11:00 P.M. on Discovery Channel. (--This new series follows Brad Barker and his San Diego-based security firm HALO Corp as they try to recover kidnapped people.)

--"Saturday Night Live" . . . 11:30 P.M. to 1:00 A.M. on NBC. (--Jesse Eisenberg guest hosts and Nicki Minaj is the musical guest.)

Sunday TV Reminders:

--"Jerseylicious" [2nd Season Finale] . . . 8:00 to 9:00 P.M. on Style.

--"Brick City" [2nd Season Premiere] . . . 8:00 to 9:00 P.M. on Sundance. (--Mayor Cory Booker returns for this documentary series as he seeks a second term as mayor of Newark, New Jersey.)

--"Extreme Makeover: Home Edition" . . . 8:00 to 10:00 P.M. on ABC. (--Justin Bieber, Emma Roberts and NASCAR'S Carl Edwards and Greg Biffle volunteer to build a new home for a family who lost their 17-year-old daughter to a texting-while-driving accident.)

--"Celebration of Gospel" . . . 8:00 to 10:00 P.M. on BET. (--Steve Harvey hosts. You'll find all the performers here.)

--"The 17th Annual Screen Actors Guild Awards" . . . 8:00 to 10:00 P.M. on TBS and TNT. (--Ernest Borgnine receives a Life Achievement Award. You'll find all the nominees here.)

--"The Lost Valentine" . . . 9:00 to 11:00 P.M. on CBS. (--Jennifer Love Hewitt is a TV reporter who helps a World War 2 widow, played by Betty White, learn more about her long-lost husband.)

--"Bridalplasty" [1st Season Finale] . . . 9:00 to 10:00 P.M. on E!

--"Oprah Presents Master Class" . . . 10:00 to 11:00 P.M. on OWN. (--"SNL" creator Lorne Michaels guests.)

--"The Real Housewives of Atlanta" [3rd Season Finale] . . . 10:00 to 11:30 P.M. on Bravo.

--"UNCF: An Evening of Stars" . . . 10:00 P.M. to Midnight on BET. (--The 32nd fund-raiser for the United Negro College Fund pays tribute to Chaka Khan . . . Chaka Khan.) (--You can never say it just once.) (Find all the guests here.)

Katy Perry's Upcoming Concerts Will Smell Like Candy:

KATY PERRY wants her upcoming California Dreams Tour to be arty and crazy . . . kinda like LADY GAGA and PINK'S shows . . . and if that's what she's going for, it sounds like she's on the right track. --She says, quote, "I have this whole thing in my show that is about candy and cupcakes and meat. It's both really sweet and shocking, but not in a sexual way." --Katy is also introducing something called "smell-o-vision." --She explains, quote, "It's the first concert that's going to smell good. It's going to smell like you're in cotton candy heaven. It's a fun little nuance." (--Unfortunately, Katy didn't elaborate any more on "smell-o-vision.") --Katy adds, quote, "I just really want to raise the bar. Touring is no longer an ordinary thing where you play an instrument in jeans and a T-shirt. --"It has some pizzazz these days, and I'm definitely bringing the pizzazz with a lot of bells and whistles. The show has a Broadway feel to it. It's got a storyline that's going to be very interesting, kind of loosely based on my life, but a cartoon version." (--Katy's world tour begins next month, but it won't hit the U.S. until June 7th. You can see her full itinerary at her website, here.) (--The phrase "smell-o-vision" was first used for a movie that came out in 1960, called "Scent of Mystery". About 30 different smells were piped into the theater at the appropriate moments throughout the film.)

Richie Sambora Wants Bon Jovi to Be the Rolling Stones:

BON JOVI'S current tour grossed over $146 MILLION last year . . . and it'll pick up where it left off in two weeks. And drummer TICO TORRES says he's looking forward to taking a break after it ends in July. --But guitarist RICHIE SAMBORA says it won't be a long breather . . . because he wants to see the band keep on going like the ROLLING STONES. --He says, quote, "We do need a little bit of a break, but not that much of a break, 'cause what's going to happen is there's more songs to be written and . . . you know, guess what? We want to be the Rolling Stones. I know I do." --Richie adds, quote, "I don't think we know what the hell's gonna happen [after the tour]. We're just going out there and working our asses off and enjoying it, actually being the best band of our lives . . . we're not gonna quit. --"We're gonna keep on going and writing new, great songs . . . go in the studio and make great records . . . evolve more . . . and get back into stadiums and give people a great, great show." --Richie also acknowledges that JON BON JOVI wants to do a solo album after the tour . . . and he's cool with that. He says, quote, "It's okay with all of us. We're all gonna stick together. We're like a gang."

Check Out This Rejection Letter Madonna Got In 1981:

Here's an important lesson for struggling artists: Don't let rejection keep you down, because even the most talented people get told 'no' before they get a 'yes.' --Even MADONNA. --A letter has surfaced, in which a record label president named Jimmy Ienner rejected Madonna. He said, quote, "I enjoyed listening to Madonna. The production, arrangements and she are very strong. The direction is a good one." --He added that he liked some of the songs she sang, but said that he, quote, "did not like 'Love on the Run' at all." --He concluded that he "did not feel that [Madonna] is ready yet" . . . but did say that he does, quote, "hear the basis for a strong artist. I will pass for now, but I will wait for more." --Well, that didn't happen. Two years later, in 1983, Madonna released her debut album on Sire records . . . and then, you know, she went on to become one of the most iconic female pop artists EVER. (--You can see the whole letter, here.) (--And you can listen to Madonna's 1981 version of "Love on the Run", here. What do you think? Would you have been interested in signing her?)

AMANDA BYNES has brought her insanity back to Twitter. (Full Story)

British actor BENJAMIN WALKER will play our 16th president in "Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter". (Full Story)

A promo for Bravo's "Real Housewives of Orange County" contains a brief shot of TAMRA BARNEY'S nipple. (Full Story)

GLADYS HORTON of THE MARVELETTES . . . who sang "Please Mr. Postman" . . . died on Wednesday. She'd been recovering from a stroke. She was 66. (Full Story)

A crazy woman is suing DIDDY, claiming that he's responsible for the collapse of the World Trade Center. She also says she and Diddy had a son together. She's asking for $900 BILLION in child support and $100 billion in "loss of income." (Full Story) is reporting that KATE WALSH will return to "Grey's Anatomy" for one episode on March 31st. It's going to be a "musical-themed" episode. (Full Story)


Take a Quiz That Uses Your Favorite Colors To Figure Out Your Perfect Job:

If you're wondering what the PERFECT JOB is for you . . . and you don't want to meet with career counselors or make a bunch of lists about your hopes and dreams . . . why not put it in the hands of your favorite COLOR? --Dewey Sadka is the author of "The Dewey Color System", and he created a quiz that uses your favorite colors to figure out your perfect career. --He says that by only focusing on colors, the quiz gets rid of the divide between how you perceive yourself and what the truth really is. All you do is pick which colors you like. --We don't want to spoil it too much or bias your choices, but Sadka uses decades-worth of color research to figure out what your preferences mean. --Some examples: People who lean toward yellows are information-driven . . . people who lean toward blue are idea-driven . . . and people who lean toward red are results-driven. (AOL Jobs) (--You can take the quiz at It only takes a couple of minutes.)

If the Super Bowl Goes To Overtime, Papa John's Will Give a Free Pizza To Every Single American Adult:

There have been 44 Super Bowls, and none of them have gone to overtime. And Papa John's is hoping that trend continues this year . . . or this publicity stunt is going to blow up in their face. --Papa John's is one of the official sponsors of the Super Bowl this year, and they've just made a major announcement: If the game goes to overtime, they'll give a free large pizza with up to three toppings to EVERY SINGLE American adult. --There is a catch. To be eligible, you have to register for Papa John's Rewards Program before Super Bowl Sunday, which is February 6th. --Registration is free but, you know, they'll probably send you a whole bunch of emails and whatnot. --The line in the Super Bowl is tight this year . . . the Green Bay Packers are two-and-a-half-point favorites over the Pittsburgh Steelers . . . so the game MIGHT be tight enough to go to overtime. But probably not. (Slashfood) (--If you want to register and get in on the contest, go to
The Girl Scouts Are Cutting Down To Just Six Types of Cookies . . . Will Your Favorites Make the Cut?

Downsizing is everywhere, man. It's even affecting the one industry in America we thought was untouchable . . . cookie production. --The Girl Scouts are cutting back on the different types of cookies they're selling. Right now they have 11 varieties . . . but this year, some troops are only selling SIX as a test. If the test works, they'll officially cut down to six flavors next year. --By cutting flavors, they can save money on production, and also help the Girl Scouts focus their sales efforts. So which six are going to survive? Basically, it's the classics.

#1.) Thin Mints

#2.) Do-Si-Dos, which are the two oatmeal cookies with peanut butter in between.

#3.) Trefoils, which are the shortbread cookies.

#4.) Samoas, also known as Caramel deLites, the vanilla cookies covered in caramel and sprinkled with coconut.

#5.) Lemon Chalet Cremes, the cinnamon cookies with lemon filling.

#6.) Tagalongs/Peanut Butter Patties, the vanilla cookies layered with peanut butter and covered in chocolate.

--The flavors getting cut are Thanks-A-Lot, sugar-free chocolate chip cookies, Dulce De Leche, Lemonades, and Thank U Berry Munch. --Thin Mints are the biggest seller, and account for about 25% of all sales. Samoas are next, at 19% . . . then Tagalongs at 13% . . . Do-Si-Dos at 11% . . . and Trefoils at 9%. All of the others add up to about 23%. --Girl Scout Cookies bring in more than $714 MILLION every year, and usually make up at least two-thirds of every local Girl Scout council's budget. (Wall Street Journal)

A Woman Files For Divorce From Her New Husband . . . After He Brings His Mother Along On Their Honeymoon:

It's tough to be romantic and sexy when your mother's around . . . making sure you tuck in your shirt, asking the restaurant to turn down the air conditioning, silently and not-so-silently judging at all times. --In December, in Rome, Italy, a couple got married . . . and then, as they went to their airport to fly to their honeymoon in France . . . the groom's mom showed up. And the groom told his new wife he'd invited mom along on the honeymoon. --She pulled him aside and asked him to reconsider, but he said he couldn't leave her alone for health reasons -So the three of them went on their honeymoon together. Now, less than a month later, the bride has filed for divorce . . . citing, quote, "excessive emotional attachment" between her husband and his mother. (AFP)

The "Unluckiest Man In the World" Has Survived Snake Bites, Armed Robbery, a Stabbing . . . And Has Now Been Hit By Lightning:

47-year-old John Wade Agan of Tampa, Florida believes he's the WORLD'S UNLUCKIEST MAN. And if you look at his last four years . . . he makes a pretty decent case. --Four years ago, he was robbed at gunpoint while he was driving his taxi. The robbers beat him up and stuffed him in the trunk of his car. --Three years ago, he was stabbed in the chest with a butcher knife. --Two years ago, two different snakes bit him at the same time. --And now, on Tuesday, he was STRUCK BY LIGHTNING. --Somehow, he's survived all of those. He says that when people hear his stories, they think he's making all this up to get prescriptions for painkillers but, quote, "I don't care what people say. Any day of the week, I'll go take a drug test." --He's still in the hospital now, recovering from the lightning strike. (St. Petersburg Times)

A Woman In Russia Burns Down Her House When She Tries To Revive Her Dead Sister's Mummified Body:

Last year in Yekaterinburg, Russia, a 73-year-old woman died from natural causes. She was home at the time with her 69-year-old sister. --Instead of reporting that her sister had died, the 69-year-old woman decided she was going to go on a quest to bring her sister back to life. --For the past year, she's researched cures . . . all while preserving and mummifying her sister's body with GASOLINE. --Finally, on Tuesday, she came up with her best plan. She was going to connect her sister to a car battery and use the wires to JUMP START her. --But when she tried it, the spark from the battery made all the gasoline catch on fire . . . and burned down the house. Also, surprisingly enough, it didn't bring her sister back to life. --The woman was hospitalized with burns and smoke inhalation. --Police are charging her with arson . . . but believe that she's not mentally stable. (Russian Times)
Police In New York Show Up At the Scene of a Car Accident . . . And Find a Man Tied Up and Bleeding In the Trunk of a Car:

On Wednesday, police in Manhattan went to the scene of an accident between a cab and a BMW: The BMW driver had run a light, crashed into the back of the cab, and got stuck in the snow on the side of the road. Then he ran away. --When the police got to the scene, they figured out why the BMW driver had taken off on foot. They noticed a BULLET HOLE in the trunk of the car, and popped it open. --Inside, they found . . . A MAN. --The guy was tied up, he was badly beaten, he was bleeding, and part of his EAR was missing. He was rushed to the hospital but he's still unconscious. --Police believe that the man who was tied up is the owner of the BMW, and he was trying to sell it. When he met with a potential buyer, that guy beat him, tied him up in the trunk, and drove off. --The cops say they have a name of a suspect, but he's still at large. They got his name and the victim's name off a bill of sale inside the car. (New York Daily News)

A Court Rules That Inmates Can't Play "Dungeons & Dragons" . . . Because It's Too Similar To Organizing a Gang:

Some really bad news today for any HUGE, HUGE NERDS who get sent to prison. Leave your 12-sided die at home . . . because there ain't no role-playing games on the inside. --On Wednesday, a U.S. Court of Appeals ruled that American inmates can NOT play "Dungeons & Dragons" in prison. --In "D&D", there's a dungeon master who gives directions to other players as they go on quests and fight against dragons and other monsters. --And the court ruled that the entire dynamic, quote, "mimics the organization of a gang" . . . and they can't have gangs in prison, even if those gangs are made up of wizards and orcs and elves. --The court was ruling on "D&D" because of an inmate named Kevin Singer in Wisconsin, who got life in prison in 2002 for killing his sister's boyfriend. --He's a lifelong Dungeon Master and wanted to bring his game in with him. He was denied . . . and the "D&D" fight has been slowly moving through the courts ever since. (FOX News)

Border Patrol Finds That Mexican Smugglers Have Been Getting Drugs Into the U.S. With . . . a Medieval Catapult:

One of the newest ways that Mexican drug cartels have been smuggling drugs across the border into the U.S. is . . . by using technology straight out of "Lord of the Rings". --Border Patrol and the Mexican military recently found a MEDIEVAL CATAPULT just south of the Arizona border. Smugglers would put packages of marijuana in the catapult and launch them to people waiting across the border. --Every year, the Border Patrol busts hundreds of different smuggling attempts . . . from tunnels underground, to horses and trucks on the ground, to small aircraft above the ground. This is their very first catapult, though. (Reuters)


A Fugitive Who's Been On the Run Since 1983 Is Finally Busted . . . When He Gets Arrested For Relieving Himself In Public:

Back in 1983, 23-year-old Edward Nathan Junior was locked up at the Tampa Community Correctional Center, serving five years for robbery with a deadly weapon. --On August 27th, 1983, he escaped from a work release center and went on the lam. He's been on the run as a fugitive ever since. --On Friday, after 27 years, four months, and 25 days of freedom, Edward was finally captured . . . when police in Fulton County, Georgia arrested him for PEEING IN PUBLIC. --They had no idea who he was. He escaped when he was 23 . . . he's FIFTY now . . . so he hasn't exactly been at the top of anyone's fugitive pile. All they knew was that some 50-year-old was peeing in the street, so they busted him. --He told them his name was Claude Brooks. They ran his fingerprints through a national database and found out he was actually Edward Nathan Junior . . . and was still wanted by the Florida Department of Corrections. --He's been living as Claude Brooks since he escaped. He works for Atlanta's public works department as an environmental services worker. --Right now the police are still sorting out the case, but Edward will probably be sent back to Florida to face his escape charges. (FOX 5 - Atlanta)


Not-So-Stupid News: Current college freshmen have experienced the biggest one-year drop in mental health in HISTORY. Only 52% say their mental health is "above average." 30% say they were overwhelmed by high school. (Full Story)

Colorado State University just got an $8 million grant from the Department of Defense . . . to develop bomb-detecting plants for malls and airports that change color in the presence of explosives. (Full Story)

A woman in Florida couldn't afford a hit man to kill her abusive ex-boyfriend. So she tried to negotiate a lower price . . . to paralyze him from the neck down. Unfortunately she negotiated with an undercover cop, and was arrested. (Full Story)

A woman in Tennessee got upset that her brother was getting arrested outside her house for traffic violations . . . so she mooned the cops. Now she's in jail, and her brother's already been released. (Full Story)


#1.) The Creepy Selena Gomez Fan on YouTube Also Does Special Birthday Dances by Request:

The creepy Selena Gomez fan from YouTube is like a gift that keeps on giving. Yesterday we told you about how he professed his love for her in a series of YouTube videos. --But it turns out he also does special birthday dances for women who email him. And his signature dance move is . . . humping the air. In one video, he even does it in a SKIRT, then takes it off to reveal a G-STRING underneath. (--Search for "JayHerrod1 Debera Birthday" and "Birthday Dance Wearing a Skirt." He takes off the skirt at :55.)

#2.) Here's an Old Couple Doing an Awesome Interpretive Dance to the Whitney Houston Song "I Wanna Dance With Somebody":

A few months ago, some cover band called The Time Machine Band posted a YouTube video of a gig at an Oklahoma casino. And now it's starting to get some attention online. But not because of the music. --It's because a strange older couple did a hilarious interpretive dance to the Whitney Houston song "I Wanna Dance With Somebody". (--Search for "Time Machine Band Dance With Somebody." Don't miss the karate chops at 1:01.)

#3.) The Leftover Footage From "Jackass 3-D" Will Be Posted Online April 1st . . . And the Trailer Was Released Yesterday:

The "Jackass" guys are releasing the leftover footage from "Jackass 3-D" on on April 1st. They're calling it "Jackass 3.5", and they posted the trailer on Joost yesterday. (--Search for "Jackass 3.5 Trailer")

#4.) A Super-Fast Rapper Has Been Posting Videos on YouTube . . . But Some People Say They're Fake:

A wannabe rapper named Mac Lethal has been posting videos on YouTube showing how fast he can rap, and it's pretty impressive . . . if it's real. He posted one on YouTube less than a week ago that already has over half a million views. -- Some people say it looks doctored, but see what you think. He also posted a new one yesterday that's not as fast, but it sums up the entire plot of the movie "Dazed and Confused" in two minutes. (--WARNING: Both videos include a TON of profanity, including the F-word.) (--Search for "Fastest Rapper Ever Mac Lethal" and "Dazed and Confused 120 Seconds")

#5.) A Guy Was Playing Xbox Kinect in His Living Room . . . And Accidentally Punched His Toddler In the Face:

Last November, Xbox released their Kinect system, the one that lets you play games by jumping around in front of the TV instead of using a controller. --And as you might expect, there are now plenty of videos on YouTube of people hurting themselves . . . or the people standing around them . . . while they're playing. And the worst one yet was posted yesterday on --It shows a guy playing Kinect while a little girl runs around behind him. And the little girl ends up taking a huge shot to the face. (--Search for "Kinect Bad Parenting Adventure")

Three Hidden Costs of Dating:

Let's face it: dating is expensive. From drinks to dinners to movies, the cost of chasing tail adds up. But it's not just your wallet that takes a hit. Today we've got three hidden costs of dating, courtesy of

#1.) Friendships. It's just a fact of life: people lose friends when they get into new relationships. --Most people have five friends they consider to be part of their "inner circle." But when you get into a new relationship, that number drops to just four. And since one of them is your new boyfriend or girlfriend, it means you really just lost two friends.

#2.) Time. Dating is a process that takes time. According to a survey by a dating site in the UK, women said they went on an average of 24 dates before finding someone they wanted to settle down with. --That's time that could be spent doing other productive things, like going the extra mile at work or spending time with friends and family.

#3.) The City You Live In. The city you live in has a huge impact on how much you'll have to spend on dating. According to a survey by, New York City is the most expensive city in the U.S. for dating. --Dinner and a movie in New York runs about $135, while the same date in Portland, Oregon, would set you back just $82. (


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