Monday, February 21, 2011

HOLLYWOOD DIRT OVERFLOW (02-21-11)

LINDSAY LOHAN LUNACY

Are Lindsay Lohan and Samantha Ronson Dating Again?

Sometimes the magnetic attraction between two people is just too strong to resist. And that may have been the case with LINDSAY LOHAN and SAMANTHA RONSON. Because they had a SLEEPOVER last week. --Thursday night, they were at a joint called the Hollywood Roosevelt. They left together in Sam's Porshe, and ended up at Sam's place. (--Here's a picture of them leaving.) --On Friday morning at 5:00 A.M., Samantha Tweeted, quote, "Watching grey's anatomy – my fav show. @lindsaylohan sleeping next 2 me – should i wake her up to let her know her mom is going on GMA?" (--Yes, DINA LOHAN was on "Good Morning America" Friday morning. More on that later.) --Lindsay hit up Twitter Friday afternoon to clarify that she was NOT partying. She said, quote, "I was just at roosevelt to meet Samantha and say happy birthday to a friend." --She added, quote, "I take my sobriety seriously. Please dont believe this accusations. i know the rules and i wouldnt risk probation. xoxo L."


Dina Lohan Says She Knew Early On That Lindsay Had a Problem:

DINA LOHAN was on "Good Morning America" and "20/20" on Friday. She said she's sure LINDSAY no longer drinks, but admitted that Lindsay's battle with addiction will be, quote, "a lifelong struggle." --Dina also defended herself against those who say she's done a lousy job of helping Lindsay with that struggle. --She said, quote, "I can't always fight what they're saying or thinking of me. I'm certainly not that person. There's always going to be mistakes made by teenagers and people growing, you know?" --She also said she's never been in DENIAL about Lindsay's problem. She was just never willing to talk about it . . . quote, "I knew early on, I just didn't tell anyone about it. It was a personal situation." (--Here's video.) --Sources say Lindsay wasn't happy that her mom didn't warn her about the interview beforehand . . . but they talked and they're cool now. --In fact, Dina is flying out for a visit today. It's her first time out West since Lindsay got out of rehab last month. (--On Saturday night, Lindsay had dinner with her dad, Michael, and a few friends. Sources say she didn't eat much, but Michael sent Lindsay home with several bags of prepared meals he bought for her from the restaurant.)


Will Lindsay Lohan Star in a Movie About Celebrities Who Pretend to Die In Order to Escape the Media Circus?

LINDSAY LOHAN is reportedly circling her first post-rehab film project. And the premise is pretty interesting, given her situation. --According to RadarOnline.com, she's in talks to star in a movie called "Escaping the Game". --It's about celebrities faking their own deaths and moving to a remote island to escape the fame game and create new lives for themselves. (--It's an interesting premise. And I'm sure they'll squeeze some Elvis / Jim Morrison / Michael Jackson humor out of it.) --The most interesting thing about it is that Lindsay would NOT be playing one of the celebrities. She's in line for the part of an investigator who's on the trail of some of the missing celebs. (--Just like that guy who's making the Linda Lovelace movie, the producer of "Escaping the Game" is sure he can make this work, and believes the film will help Lindsay prove to the world that she's on her way back up the Hollywood food chain.) MILEY MANIA MEETS LOHAN LUNACY


Michael Lohan Has Written An Open Letter to Billy Ray Cyrus:

MICHAEL LOHAN has written an open letter to BILLY RAY CYRUS. I guess we can say it's from one ineffective parent to another. Here it is in its entirety . . . --"Oh My God! Am I seeing and reliving almost the same exact situations, scrutiny, pain and willingness to sacrifice yourself, for the sake of your family? --"As hard and frustrating as it is, believe me when I say, it's a road worth [traveling]. Even if it may have its bumps and grinds along the way. --"As I was raised, there is nothing like the love a man has for his family nor is there any length he will go to save or protect them. --"Isn't it clear that the answer is so easy but the people who don't matter, make it so hard? While all we want is our family and normal lives back, others forsake that for so much more. --"Why is it that people don't put themselves in [our] shoes? And say to themselves, 'How would I feel if that was happening to me?' The sad part is, they don't and they probably never will. But that doesn't mean that men like you and I should ever give up. --"While we can't change the world, our example just might touch a few, and maybe even the one(s) we seek to save. --"To that end, I want to say, that I know what you are going through, I feel your pain and frustration, and I also admire your strength, dedication and love, for your family in the name of God."
Miley Cyrus Is Not Happy About Her Dad's "GQ" Interview:

No big surprise here: MILEY CYRUS is NOT happy about BILLY RAY'S recent comments to "GQ" magazine about how "Hannah Montana" destroyed his family and how Miley is spinning out of control. --A so-called "friend" says, quote, "To say Miley is angry is an understatement. She's furious that her own flesh and blood would make a private matter so public. Who does he think he is, Michael Lohan?" --The friend adds, quote, "This isn't what a father does. He never said a bad world about 'Hannah Montana' all those years it made millions for the family, and now that Miley has turned 18 and is making her own decisions, he does this. Unforgivable." --The friend says Miley and her dad haven't even spoken since December . . . quote, "Miley has told him that if he wants to talk with her he has her number. It's been the same number she always has had."


Is Owen Wilson's Kid NOT His Kid?

OWEN WILSON'S girlfriend, Jade Duell, gave birth to a baby boy last month. They named him Robert Ford Wilson. And now the not-always-reliable "Star" tabloid is claiming the kid might not be his. --Here's the story: Jade was a federal air marshal, and she met Owen on a flight. They had a long-distance relationship that didn't even really become exclusive until Jade BECAME PREGNANT. --The thing is, while Jade was nailing Owen, she also had a boyfriend. They were even LIVING TOGETHER . . . and he had no idea she was getting it on with Owen behind his back. --A so-called "source" says, quote, "Around the time Jade got pregnant, she was still living and sleeping with her now ex-boyfriend. I don't know if even she can say for sure who the father is!" --When Jade discovered she was pregnant, she started making plans to move to Los Angeles. Her boyfriend finally found out about the affair when a co-worker she had confided in told him everything.


Dianna Agron and Alex Pettyfer Have Broken Up:

The media was trying to build up DIANNA AGRON and ALEX PETTYFER as some kind of up-and-coming Hollywood power couple. Especially with their new thriller, "I Am Number Four", having just hit theaters this past Friday. --Things were getting so serious, they even moved in together, and a few weeks ago, there were engagement rumors. --Unfortunately, it's already over. They broke up for reasons unknown, and Dianna has moved out. --Dianna . . . who's 24 . . . plays queen bee cheerleader Quinn on "Glee". --Alex . . . who's 20 . . . has another high-profile flick coming out in less than two weeks. It's called "Beastly", and it's a modern-day take on "Beauty and the Beast". VANESSA HUDGENS is playing his "beauty". --Obviously, the cynical among you are going to start debating whether or not the relationship was a PUT ON just to hype the movie. At this point, I can't really argue against that. -And if it was . . . it didn't really work. "I Am Number Four" still fell a couple million dollars behind LIAM NEESON'S movie "Unknown" at the box office.


Paris Hilton's Stolen Cake Was Worth $3,200 . . . and It Was Spiked with Absinthe:

On Friday, we heard that some guy crashed PARIS HILTON'S 30th birthday party and stole a $2,000 cake that was basically just for show. --Well, it turns out that the cake was actually worth $3,200 . . . and it was spiked with the liquor ABSINTHE. --Lucid is the company that makes the absinthe that was in the cake. In fact, they're the ones who had the cake made. (--In retrospect it makes sense . . . seeing as how the cake had the same pair of eyes on it as a bottle of Lucid absinthe. Check it out.) --Lucid issued the following statement . . . quote, "It is very unfortunate that someone stole the cake from Paris' birthday party. --"We had the cake designed especially for her with Lucid in the batter and a beautiful representation of Lucid's artwork on it, which she requested to meet the Moulin Rouge theme of her party. We only wish that guests could have tried her delicious cake." (--The guy who stole it claimed he was going to bring it to a homeless shelter on Skid Row. He said, quote, "There are too many people in this city who don't get to eat. They should get to enjoy something awesome.")


Showbiz Randomness: Eddie Munster and Kenickie from "Grease" Almost Got Into a Fight:

Last weekend, ROBERT BLAKE got kicked out of a Hollywood memorabilia show for causing trouble. But he wasn't the only one making a scene. --There was almost a brawl between BUTCH PATRICK . . . who played Eddie Munster on "The Munsters" . . . and JEFF CONAWAY . . . a.k.a. Kenickie from "Grease". --Apparently, Conaway showed up at the event with Butch's ex-girlfriend. She's an ex-Philadelphia Eagles cheerleader. --She and Butch were engaged, but she left him in November. The breakup was so bad it sent him to rehab. --Anyway, Butch and Jeff got into a heated argument . . . and they almost came to blows. Butch's former "Munsters" co-star PAT PRIEST . . . a.k.a. Marilyn Munster . . . even had to get between them. --In the end, no punches were thrown, and unlike Robert Blake, neither of them got kicked out.
The Frankie Muniz 911 Call: Frankie Says His Girlfriend is Going Crazy and Trashing His House:

The 911 call FRANKIE MUNIZ made during his altercation with his girlfriend Elycia a little over a week ago has hit the Internet. I hate to call it "entertaining" . . . but it certainly is more INTERESTING than the average celebrity 911 call. --Despite early reports that Frankie assaulted Elycia, it's Frankie who places the call here . . . and he makes it sound like she's completely out of control. --It starts right off with Frankie saying, quote, "My girlfriend is drunk and she's going crazy and she's trashing my house. Literally . . . lamps, everything. And she's going crazy. --"She's hitting me in the face and I don't know what to do, 'cuz I'm about to lose control." --Frankie is pretty frantic, but he's also adamant that he doesn't want the cops to get involved . . . because he's famous and he doesn't want it to be all over the news. --He tells the 911 operator, quote, "I don't want to make a big deal because I am a celebrity. I don't want there to be a big deal." --He adds, quote, "I don't want any charges. I just want her to stop throwing stuff! . . . I don't wanna make a big deal, please. I actually don't want you guys to come out. I just need . . . can you talk to her and tell her to calm down?" --At one point during the chaos, Elycia says, quote, "You just hit me!" And Frankie replies, quote, "I did not hit you. You punched me in the face." --He also tells the operator, quote, "I don't wanna press any charges. I don't want anything bad to happen to her." --As we heard last week, this chaos erupted two Fridays ago. Earlier in the day, Frankie allegedly put a gun to his own head during an argument. He then went to the hospital. --It's not clear WHY Frankie went to the hospital. Elycia claimed she called a member of Frankie's rock band and had him take Frankie in because of the gun incident. --But Frankie claimed he went because he fell and hit his head. That's a claim he also makes in this 911 call. --After he returned from the hospital, things blew up again. That's when Frankie made this call. (--You can listen to it here.) --By the way . . . Frankie and Elycia are STILL together and working things out.


Liam Neeson Has the New #1 Movie in the Country with "Unknown":

The new LIAM NEESON action thriller "Unknown" is # at the box office this week. It earned $21.8 million over the weekend. The teen sci-fi flick "I Am Number Four" came in second place with $19.5 million, and "Big Mommas: Like Father, Like Son" came in fifth with $17 million. Here are the Top 3 movies . . .

1.) (NEW) "Unknown", $21.8 million
2.) (NEW) "I Am Number Four", $19.5 million
3.) "Gnomeo and Juliet", $19.4 million. Up to $50.4 million in its 2nd week


Hailee Steinfeld Has Lined Up Her Next Gig:

HAILEE STEINFELD . . . the amazing, Oscar-nominated 14-year-old star of "True Grit" . . . has lined up her next gig. -She's going to star in a drama called "Forgotten" . . . in which she'll play a girl who loses her memory every day at 4:33 P.M. and can only "remember" things that happen in her future. --She relies on notes to herself, and a school friend, to help keep her life together. But things get complicated when she meets a boy she likes who's NOT in any of her flash-forward memories. --The movie is part romance, part psychological thriller. It's based on a book of the same name that doesn't even come out until June. It's by Cat Patrick.


Mila Kunis Will Play the Wicked Witch of the West in Sam Raimi's Oz Movie:

MILA KUNIS will play the Wicked Witch of the West in SAM RAIMI'S Oz movie, "The Great and Powerful Oz". --The movie is a prequel to "The Wizard of Oz" . . . telling the story of how the Wizard BECAME the Wizard. That part will no doubt be BRILLIANTLY played by JAMES FRANCO.


Get Ready for "The Great Gatsby" . . . in 3D?

The not-always-reliable British tabloids say that BAZ LUHRMANN is going to direct a new movie version of F. SCOTT FITZGERALD'S classic novel "The Great Gatsby" . . . in 3D. --LEONARDO DICAPRIO is reportedly on board to star as Jay Gatsby . . . with CAREY MULLIGAN in the female lead as Daisy Buchanan. (--ROBERT REDFORD and MIA FARROW played the parts in the 1974 film version.) --Lurhmann directed Leo in the 1996 movie "Romeo + Juliet".




Check Out the Trailer for a Scary-Looking Moon Mission Flick Called "Apollo 18":

What if the REAL reason we haven't been back to the moon in four decades is because there was a lunar mission in 1973 that we've never heard of before, in which the astronauts found other life up there . . . and it wasn't friendly? --That's the premise of "Apollo 18", which comes out on April 22nd. It uses the whole "found footage" technique made popular by movies like "Cloverfield", "The Blair Witch Project" and "Paranormal Activity". (--Check out the trailer here.) (--This could be the coolest moon movie since the 1977 classic "Capricorn One", in which NASA FAKED the moon landing, then had to kill the "astronauts" who took part in it . . . one of whom
was expertly portrayed by O.J. SIMPSON.)


Kiefer Sutherland May Be Returning to TV:

Deadline.com says KIEFER SUTHERLAND is in talks to star in a new drama series called "Touch", which is being developed by the same guy who created "Heroes". --Kiefer would play a father who discovers that his mute, autistic kid can predict the future. "Touch" should make Fox's schedule next year. --Meanwhile, the "24" movie is supposedly STILL in the works. Last we heard, production was supposed to begin sometime later this year. Kiefer is currently making his Broadway debut in the show "That Championship Season".


Tim Allen May Be Returning to TV:

TIM ALLEN will star in a sitcom that ABC is developing called "The Last Days of Men". Originally, the show was supposed to be about "a man named Tim navigating a world dominated by women" . . . but that's being "re-tooled." --At the very least, Tim's character will no longer be named Tim, but it's unclear what else will be changing. The show will be up for a spot on ABC's schedule next season. (--FYI: Tim's character on "Home Improvement" was named Tim.)


Is This Proof Russell Hantz Leaked "Survivor" Secrets?

"Survivor" villain RUSSELL HANTZ has denied allegations that he leaked secret details about the first two seasons he was on to JIM EARLY, a blogger who posts on SurvivorSucks.com. --But now, Early has released what he claims are emails between him and Russell, which prove that Russell was his source. (--The emails were published on TMZ. You can download the PDF, here.) --So far, there's no indication that CBS and / or "Survivor" plan on going after Russell for leaking spoilers, which would be a big breach of contract. (--Russell is also on the current season of "Survivor", which is his third one.)


Monday TV Reminders: (--Check your local listings.)

--"House" . . . 8:00 to 9:00 P.M. on Fox. (--House gets love advice from two fifth graders about his relationship with Cuddy.)

--"The Bachelor" . . . 8:00 to 9:00 P.M. on ABC. (Brad and his final four enjoy some hometown dates.)

--"Big Time Rush" . . . 8:00 to 9:00 P.M. on Nickelodeon. (--Russell Brand guest stars in an hour-long special where the boys stumble across buried treasure.)

--"Amanda Knox: Murder on Trial in Italy" . . . 9:00 to 11:00 P.M. on Lifetime. (--Hayden Panettiere stars as college student Amanda Knox, who was accused of murdering her roommate. It's based on a true story.)

--"Hawaii Five-0" . . . 10:00 to 11:00 P.M. on CBS. (--Dane Cook guest stars as Dano's brother.)

--"Shatner's Raw Nerve" . . . 10:00 to 10:30 P.M. on Biography. (--Kevin Pollack is this week's guest.)

--"Heavy" . . . 10:00 to 11:00 P.M. on A&E. (--This week's cases include a 52-year-old former football player who weighs 443 pounds.)
Lady Gaga's Biology Teacher Taught Her About Sex . . . Using "Wooden Penises":

LADY GAGA went to a strict Catholic girls' school when she was younger, and although most of her sex education was just people telling her NOT to have sex . . . she did have one teacher who would be real with them. --She explains, quote, "The doors were sort of shut and the blinds were pulled down when the nurse came in to talk to us about safe sex and celibacy. It was more of an abstinence conversation than it was about safe sex. --"It really was my biology teacher who taught us about safe sex . . . --"The wooden penises would come out, and she would take out a condom and we would all sort of sit there. We barely even had contact with boys until I was 15 years old." --Lady Gaga also said she learned a lot from her mother --She said, quote, "My mom was always very open with me. [She] was a dancer for 20 years, so she had a lot of gay friends and straight friends and friends of all different races. --"She's a really, really cultured woman, my mother. She just taught me to be very loving and very open, but very, very safe. She said, 'Don't judge anyone, but don't trust everyone.'" --Meanwhile, in an interview Friday. Gaga said that if she could choose someone to play her in a movie about her life, she'd go with MARISA TOMEI. (--Even though Marisa is 46 and Gaga is 24.) --She added, quote, "All my friends call me Marisa when I get angry because my New York accent just flies out of my body and I start smacking my gum." (--Obviously, we're talking about Marisa in her Oscar-winning "My Cousin Vinny" persona.) --By the way, have you seen the cool video of 10-year-old Maria Aragon covering "Born This Way"? Well, Maria was doing a radio interview on Friday . .. . and Lady Gaga called in to surprise her. (--You can find video of the interview, here. Lady Gaga joins the discussion at the 2:10 mark. It's actually pretty sweet.)


Justin Bieber Was Named the MVP of the NBA's All-Star Celebrity Game:

JUSTIN BIEBER played in the NBA's annual All-Star Celebrity Game on Friday night, which was part of the All-Star weekend festivities in Los Angeles. Justin wasn't bad at all . . . in fact, he was named the Most Valuable Player. --Afterwards, Justin said NBA legend SCOTTIE PIPPEN, who was playing on the other team, deserved to be the MVP. And he was right. --The fans vote for the MVP, and Justin's Twitter army was voting for him like crazy during the game. Justin did finish with four assists, which was a game-high . . . but his team lost, and he only made three of his 11 shots for eight points. --Pippen had 17 points . . . making six of his eight shots. Here's what Pippen had to say about Justin: Quote, "He played pretty well, but he has an ugly shot." --By the way, Pippen STUFFED one of Justin's shots. Of course, he had a massive height advantage. Justin is five-foot-five, while Scottie is six-foot-eight. (--Here's video of Scottie's rejection.) --And here are some pictures of Justin playing . . . here's a video of all his highlights . . . and here's video of Justin making a three, and the announcers talking about how he could be up for MVP.) --The other celebrity ballers included: Romeo, Trey Songz, Nick Cannon, actor Michael Rapaport, Common and Rob Kardashian . . . plus former NBA players Rick Fox, Jalen Rose, Mitch Richmond and Chris Mullin. --By the way, Common accidentally RAN OVER Justin at one point in the game. (--You can watch video of that, here. It wasn't that bad. Justin wasn't hurt or anything. It was nothing compared to what happened to Justin's character on "CSI" last week. Here's video of Justin being GUNNED DOWN on "CSI".)


The New Cars Album Has a Release Date . . . And They Released a Video for One of Their New Songs:

THE CARS will release their first album in 24 years on May 10th. It'll be called "Move Like This", and it'll feature the single "Blue Tip". They've also released a video for "Blue Tip". (--Here's the link.) (--Unlike "The New Cars", this reunion DOES feature singer RIC OCASEK. But a FULL reunion isn't possible because bassist BENJAMIN ORR . . . who sang several Cars songs, including "Drive" . . . died of pancreatic cancer in 2000.)


David Archuleta Has Been Dropped from His Record Label:

Jive Records has dumped DAVID ARCHULETA, who came in second to DAVID COOK on the seventh season of "American Idol". No reason was given . . . but it obviously has at least a little to do with his declining sales. --David's last album "The Other Side of Down" has only sold 67,000 copies since coming out last October. That's down significantly from his self-titled debut, which has moved 765,000 copies since its 2008 release. --David's holiday album "Christmas from the Heart" has sold 246,000 copies since coming out in 2009.


Check Out Radiohead's Video . . . Set to "Single Ladies":

RADIOHEAD has released a video for their single "Lotus Flower". It features singer THOM YORKE showing off all kinds of bizarre dance moves. (--You can check it out, here.) --Also . . . someone took the video, re-cut it, and set it to BEYONCÉ'S "Single Ladies". And naturally, it's quite amusing. (--You can enjoy it, here.)
Check Out Kanye West's "All of the Lights" Video:

KANYE WEST has dropped his video for "All of the Lights" . . . and it features a young girl walking around, lots of flashing lights, Kanye dancing on top of a police car, RIHANNA in a sexy outfit, and KID CUDI not really doing anything . . . --Roughly in that order. (--You can watch it, here.) (--Like all Kanye's videos of late, this one has cool parts . . . stupid parts . . . and "arty"-WTF moments where you can't figure out what's going on.)


Six People Have Been Arrested for Shooting Up Waka Flocka Flame's Bus:

Six men in their 20s have been arrested for shooting up WAKA FLOCKA FLAME'S tour bus in Charlotte, North Carolina, last week. It was supposedly a botched robbery attempt, with the target being a $1.2 million necklace. --Assuming there was a necklace, it's unclear whether it was even there, or on the bus, at the time of the shooting. Waka was not onboard at the time. --The six men allegedly let out 10 rounds shooting up the bus. Waka's entourage returned fire, and hit one guy in the shoulder . . . but none of his men were arrested. The suspects are each being held on at least $200,000 bond.


MONDAY'S SHOWBIZ EXTRAS

About 1,900 invitations have been sent out for PRINCE WILLIAM'S wedding. But foreign leaders like PRESIDENT OBAMA and French Prime Minister NICOLAS SARKOZY were not among them. (Full Story)


When "Two and a Half Men" resumes taping next Monday, it may do so WITHOUT a live studio audience. (Full Story)


KELSEY GRAMMER'S 9-year-old daughter Mason will not be at his upcoming wedding. It's scheduled for this Friday, and Mason's mom CAMILLE says she's in a talent show that she'd prefer not to miss. (Full Story)


(Meanwhile . . .) CAMILLE GRAMMER is doing red carpet fashion reporting at the Oscars next Sunday for CNN. (Full Story)


Is there a "Poltergiest" sequel . . . and yes I said SEQUEL, not remake . . . in the works? (Full Story)


Disney and Pixar are making two "Toy Story" shorts. The first one will play before "Cars 2", which hits theaters June 24th. The second one will be attached to "The Muppets" . . . which comes out November 23rd. (Full Story)


The 2010-2011 TV season is halfway done, so "Entertainment Weekly" has put together lists of the Top 50 Shows in the Ratings So Far (Full Story) and the Bottom 50 Shows in the Ratings So Far. (Full Story)


TYRA BANKS has put together a somewhat amusing promo for the next season of "America's Next Top Model", in which she imitates some of the stereotypical model wannabes. (Video)


The "Glee" / KINGS OF LEON beef appears to be over . . . thanks to GWYNETH PALTROW. She somehow instigated a series of text messages that were sent back and forth . . . and both sides apologized and agreed to move on. (Full Story)


Word has it that KATHY GRIFFIN will guest-star on an upcoming episode of "Glee", and that her character has been described as a, quote, "Sarah Palin type." But others say the character "really isn't anything like Palin." (Full Story)


BILLY CORGAN claims his new SMASHING PUMPKINS bassist NICOLE FIORENTINO is one of the girls on the Pumpkins' "Siamese Dream" album cover. But he was probably joking, because Nicole is most likely too old to have been that girl. (Full Story)


FOXY BROWN is denying a report that she got hammered at a fashion show after-party in New York City last week, and locked herself in a bathroom. TMZ claimed security had to physically remove her from the party. (Full Story)



NAZZY’S RANDOM STUFF

Just In Time For President's Day, 28% of Americans Think We Have Too Many Holidays Off:

If you're hearing me talk right now, there's a good chance it's because you're headed to work. On President's Day. Eff The Man. --But according to a new survey from Rasmussen Reports . . . about one out of four of you are totally cool with heading in to work today, while other people are sleeping late or sitting at home eating three bags of Cheetos. --In the survey, 28% of American adults said that there are too many federal holidays . . . or, in other words, they feel like we get too many holidays off. --13% say there aren't enough federal holidays . . . and 53% think the number of holidays is about right. (--And, I guess, 6% are undecided.) --Among government employees, who get EVERY holiday off, only 8% think there are too many holidays. --Every federal holiday costs approximately $450 MILLION between salary and lost productivity . . . but the people surveyed didn't get that number quoted to them going in. --There are 10 federal holidays every year: New Year's Day, Martin Luther King Day, President's Day, Memorial Day, Independence Day, Labor Day, Columbus Day, Veterans Day, Thanksgiving, and Christmas. (Rasmussen Reports)


You Can Actually Predict a Man's Sexual Partners By His First Name . . . Here Are the Names That Have the Most and Least Sex:

A dating website called SmartDate.com just ran a survey of more than 19,000 men to figure out which FIRST NAMES are connected to having the most SEXUAL RELATIONS. And they actually have an answer. --The name that was connected to the most sexual partners is . . . Francis. That's right, Francis. Not Frank. Frank actually comes up at the other end of the spectrum. The average Francis had 11.3 sexual partners, the highest of any name. --For what it's worth, according to the Social Security Administration, Francis was the 680th most popular boys' name in 2009. --The top 10 names that land the most tail are: Francis, Charles, Chris, Davis, Luke, Tom, James, Marcus, Jack, and Thomas. --As for the name tied to the fewest sexual partners, that unlucky name is . . . Edward. (--Yes, even with all of the girls walking around with "Team Edward" shirts. For no real-life Edward can match the raw, pale magnetism of Robert Pattinson.) --The average Edward reported 1.1 sexual partners. Here are the bottom 10 names in terms of total sexual partners . . . all 10 of these names averaged fewer than two partners: Edward, Dylan, Frank, Jason, Grant, David, Phillip, Harry, Bryan, and Bruce. --If your name wasn't on either of those lists, the average across the survey was 5.2 sexual partners. --SmartDate didn't offer up any theory on why some names are tied to more partners than others . . . and really, it's probably just random. Regardless, it's good ammo to hold against your friends named Edward, Dylan, or Frank. (SmartDate)


America's Chubbier Than Ever . . . But We're Also Living Longer Than Ever:

We hear plenty about how CHUBBY Americans have gotten. Well, according to the latest statistics, yeah, we're chubby . . . but now we've got more years than ever to stuff ourselves with cake and gravy.--In a new report from the National Center for Health Statistics, life expectancy in the U.S. is UP from 2007, from 76.8 years to 77.9 years. That's an all-time high. --Obesity rates are also up to about two-thirds of adults. But we're more than making up for the health implications with modern medical technology, a drop in smoking rates, and better cancer prevention. (Chicago Sun-Times)
A Woman Is Upset When Her Mom's Photo Appears on "People of Walmart" . . . So She Draws Way More Attention To It By Alerting the Local News:

So you find an embarrassing photo of yourself or a loved one online. You feel awful. You want the website to remove it, destroy it, and make sure no one sees it. Basically, you want the photo to go away as quickly and quietly as possible. --And for a woman in Michigan, her solution for making that happen was . . . to call the local FOX station and end up turning this whole thing into an international news story. --Melanie Wheeler of Ypsilanti, Michigan found out that a picture of her mother appeared on the website PeopleOfWalmart.com. If you're not familiar, that's a site where people send in photos of CRAZY LOOKING PEOPLE at their local Walmarts. --Considering the photos that usually show up on the site, the one of Melanie's mom wasn't so bad: She's wearing a long, stonewashed denim trench coat and her blonde hair seems to mullet down the back of it. Her face is obscured. --But Melanie freaked out. Rather than notice that People of Walmart says, quote, "Simply email us and we will take down [a picture of you], no problem" . . . she called Detroit's FOX affiliate to complain about the photo. The story made the news --People of Walmart took the photo down, which IS what Melanie SAYS she wanted. But before they could take it down, the story spread around the Internet, and drew FAR more attention to the photo than it ever would've or should've gotten. (FOX 2 - Detroit)


Food Trays At the Mall Are Just As Dirty As Gas Station Toilets:

Consider this a very important public service announcement: Next time you're eating at the food court at the mall and you drop a piece of your Hot Dog on a Stick or Sbarro pizza or Cinnabon on your tray . . . just let it go. --The CBC, which is a Canadian TV channel, just finished an investigation . . . and they found that the plastic trays people use in food courts at the mall are just as dirty as TOILETS in GAS STATIONS. (--And those are food trays in Canada, America's neurotically-clean little brother to the north. Imagine how nasty OUR food trays get.) --Bob Hancock is a microbiologist who ran the tests for the CBC. He says that the trays contained the same bacteria levels they saw on gas station toilets . . . and some of the trays even contained a large number of bacteria called acinetobacter. --It's bacteria that can cause a stomach illness and is very resistant to antibiotics. --When reporters from the CBC talked to mall officials, they all said that the trays are regularly wiped down and disinfected . . . but even so, they're not really supposed to come into contact with food. (CBC)


President Obama Steps In To Coach His Daughter's Basketball Team . . . Even Though His Daughter Didn't Play In the Game:

PRESIDENT OBAMA'S nine-year-old daughter Sasha plays on a community center girls' basketball team in Maryland. Like most little league teams, Sasha's team has a parent who serves as the coach. On Saturday, that parent couldn't make it. --So . . . the president stepped in. --Here's the strange part . . . ya know, besides the president taking a break to coach a girls' basketball team. Sasha wasn't even there. --She was in Colorado on a ski trip with MICHELLE OBAMA, the other Obama girl MALIA, and some friends. So the president coached the team, even though his daughter wasn't there. --As for how Obama did as a coach . . . well, no one knows. Journalists who follow his motorcade weren't allowed in the community center. His aides wouldn't say the outcome of the game. And we couldn't find any tweets from people on the inside. (NBC Washington)


An Undercover TSA Agent Is Able To Smuggle a Handgun Into the Terminal, Even with the New Body Scanners:

Remember around Thanksgiving when airports got those full body scanners? Because the TSA said it would be easier to find people smuggling weapons if they could see our junk? --Yeah . . . they're just as ineffective as the old security measures. --A report has leaked out that the TSA sent a female undercover agent through security at Dallas-Fort Worth International Airport with a gun buried in her underwear. (--Heh heh.) --She went through the full body scanner, they didn't catch the gun, and she got it into the terminal. -So they tried the test again. She successfully smuggled the gun in again. And again. And again. And again. Every time they tried the test she went into the full-body scanner, and every single time they missed the gun. --The report was leaked by a whistleblower inside the TSA, who also reported that none of the agents who missed the gun were disciplined . . . and they all got to keep working the full-body scanners. --The TSA didn't deny the tests, but said they regularly run these tests and it's rare that their agents miss things. They also said the body scanners DO work . . . but the people running them have to be paying attention. (NBC Dallas-Fort Worth)
MEATBALL CRIMINALS

Two Men Try To Rob a Gun Store . . . Using a Gun That's Not Loaded:

You know the old expression "Never bring a knife to a gun fight"? This might be an even dumber move than THAT. Never bring an unloaded gun to a loaded gun fight. --Last Thursday, in Northland, Missouri, two men tried to rob a gun store . . . using a gun that wasn't loaded. -The two men walked into Guns Unlimited in Northland, put $40 on the counter, and asked for a box of .357 Magnum ammunition. The clerk told them it would run $50 and he was short. --At that point, one of the men pulled out a .357 Magnum, pointed it at the clerk, and said, quote, "Give me your money!" --The clerk was a 65-year-old man, whose name wasn't released. He instantly figured out that the gun pointed at him was the same one the men wanted ammo for . . . and when he focused on the cylinder, he saw it was empty. --Meanwhile, this being a gun shop and all, he reached down and grabbed HIS gun . . . which WAS loaded. --The two men took off . . . and left their $40 behind. So their profit from their unarmed robbery attempt was a cool negative-40 bucks. --The police are searching for the attempted robbers. (Kansas City Star)


The Lawyer For a Man Accused of Sexually Assaulting a Horse Says the Case Wouldn't Be a Big Deal If His Client Had Just Targeted a Sheep:

Is all bestiality created equal? Actually, don't answer that. But this story might make you question everything you thought you knew about bestiality. --63-year-old Marian Wegiel of Derby, Connecticut was arrested last year for allegedly breaking into a neighbor's corral and sexually assaulting her HORSE. --Wegiel was arrested for cruelty to animals, fourth-degree sexual assault, third-degree criminal trespass, and second-degree breach of peace. --His lawyer is named Ralph Crozier. And he believes his client should just get rehab and probation for his crimes. Any punishment beyond that, he says, would happen just because the case has been blown out of proportion. --And WHY has it been blown out of proportion, according to Crozier? Because his client forced himself on a HORSE and not a SHEEP.
-Quote, "If this was a guy and a sheep, and I've had a few of those cases, this would not have gotten nearly the media attention it has. But I guess because a horse is higher off the ground, it leaves a little more to the imagination." (--Well . . . NOW it does. Way to help blow the case even more out of proportion by giving a CRAZY QUOTE to draw even more attention.) --A hearing is scheduled for March 11th. (Stamford Advocate)


A Mother Dines-and-Dashes . . . And Leaves Her 12-Year-Old Daughter Behind With the Bill:

This is just some horrible dine-and-dashing right here. --Last week, 38-year-old Melissa Graham of Bonita Springs, Florida was eating dinner at a Bonefish Grill. And she dined-and-dashed . . . but left her daughter behind. Her 12-year-old daughter . . . who got stuck with the bill. --At dinner, Melissa and her daughter ordered entrees, and Melissa ordered a bottle of wine. The daughter had no idea what was going on when her mom, quote, "began to act weird, spit her bread on the table" and walked out. --The daughter expected her to come back . . . but she never did. --It gets worse. -About an hour later, there was a call to 911. It was Melissa. She called and reported that her daughter was ABDUCTED from the Bonefish Grill by two men . . . who were either Hispanic or black. (--Melissa is white.) --When the police went to the restaurant to investigate, they found the girl hadn't been abducted . . . no, she was just sitting there with the dinner bill, wondering why her mom hadn't come back for her. --Melissa was arrested and charged with contributing to the delinquency of a minor, obstruction of a criminal investigation, filing a false report . . . and causing a minor to become needy. (???) The daughter was taken in by family services. (Naples Daily News)


A Woman Takes Her Boyfriend On "Maury" Then Dumps Him . . . He Gets Revenge By Letting the Cops Know Her "Maury" Trip Violated Her Probation:

Last month, 27-year-old April Davis of Euclid, Ohio got a chance to appear on the "Maury" show. And like any good person with no class would, she jumped at the chance. --April appeared on the show with her boyfriend . . . a 58-year-old man who's only been identified by his first name, Mike. April's family was confronting her about having a boyfriend who's 30 years older. --But things weren't perfect for April and Mike, and when they got home from "Maury", April DUMPED him. And he was FURIOUS. --So he got the ultimate revenge. April was on probation for drug trafficking when the show was taped. So Mike went to the Euclid police and told them April had violated her probation by leaving the state to tape "Maury". --He showed them plane tickets to New York . . . copies of the $500 checks they got for appearing on the show . . . and the most damning piece of evidence, the episode itself. --April was arrested. She's been sentenced to 30 days in prison and six more months of probation. (CBS 19 - Cleveland) (--Here's a news video on the story that shows footage from April's episode of "Maury".)
RANDOM NEWS EXTRAS

Check out a list of the worst cities for speed traps. Houston is the worst, with almost twice as many as the next worst city, Austin. Vegas . . . Colorado Springs . . . Jacksonville, Florida . . . Denver . . . Orlando . . . Dallas . . . Chicago . . . and L.A. rounded out the top ten. (Full Story)


Listen up defenders of Detroit: Your city DOES get a bad rap. Statistics show that St. Louis, Atlanta, Birmingham, and Orlando are all more dangerous. (Full Story)


A natural gas explosion destroyed a group of homes in Allentown, Pennsylvania . . . and now the cable company is billing each of them $170 for the cable boxes destroyed in the blast. (Full Story)


A teenager was hit and killed in traffic . . . while he was running from a mall cop who had busted him for saggy pants. (Full Story)


If you want to get pictures of boobs up on Facebook, their unwritten policy is that if it's a sculpture or drawing, they'll allow it. So . . . now you know. (Full Story)


And Egyptian man celebrated the political revolution in Egypt by naming his newborn baby . . . "Facebook." (Full Story)


A couple in Burlington, North Carolina was moving a mattress, and got the brilliant idea to have the guy lie on TOP of the SUV to hold the mattress down, while the woman drove. But she rounded a corner too fast, the guy and the mattress flew off, and he had to be airlifted to a hospital for a head injury. (Full Story)


NAZZY’S SILLY DEOS OF THE DAY

#1.) A Naked Man Stole Sausages From an Old Folks Home . . . And the Old Folks Thought It Was Hilarious:

Here's another example of American news reporting at its finest: Last month, a man outside Fort Myers, Florida wandered into a retirement home in the middle of the night, took off all his clothes, and started digging through the refrigerator. --The senior citizens knew something was up when they couldn't find their breakfast sausage the next morning. So they checked the security footage and saw what happened. Then local police recognized the guy, and arrested him. --Anyway, the stupid news report from the Associated Press made sure to highlight how excited the senior citizens were about the incident. They thought the whole thing was hilarious, and were mostly just glad to see some action. (--Search YouTube for "Naked Burglar Nabs Sausage")


#2.) A Food Activist Group Did an Al Qaeda-Style Video That Showed Them Beheading Ronald McDonald:

An activist group called the Food Liberation Army posted a terrorist-style video on YouTube earlier this month, saying they kidnapped Ronald McDonald. And the fact that they did it in the style of a ransom video offended a lot of people. --All they REALLY did was put a black bag over the head of a Ronald McDonald STATUE. But they said they'd "kill" him unless McDonald's answered a series of eight questions, including whether they hire illegal workers, and how much trash they create per year. Of course, McDonald's didn't respond. --So last week, the Food Liberation Army posted a new video showing the Ronald McDonald statue being beheaded by a guillotine. (--Search for "Execution of Ronald McDonald." They throw the guillotine at :59.)
Four Bad Things for Your Kids . . . That Are Actually Good:

Parents have to worry about a lot these days, so here's a list to help bring your stress level down: It's four major things parents worry about . . . but they don't actually need to.

#1.) Your Kids Getting Bored. At least one study has shown that boredom is actually good for kids, because it stimulates their imagination and forces them to be creative. Plus, it helps them become more patient and appreciative.

#2.) Video Games. According to separate studies done at Harvard and in Europe, video games help improve innovative thinking, creativity, and cooperation skills . . . even the violent ones. -And that's not just for boys. A recent study showed that girls who play video games are often smarter and better-behaved, and they have a stronger connection with their families.

#3.) Junk Food. Obviously, they can't eat it ALL the time. But you shouldn't keep them on a super-strict diet either. Kids who get an unhealthy treat every now and then are more likely to maintain a healthy weight. --And overweight kids are more likely to stay on a diet if they occasionally get to have something that's bad for them.

#4.) Television. It's bad for them if they only watch crap like "Skins". But kids who watch EDUCATIONAL shows are less aggressive, study more, and get better grades on reading and math tests. --So, if your kids only watch MTV, then sitting in front of the television isn't doing them any good. But if they watch the Science channel, it's okay.
(Redbook)

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