Tuesday, February 15, 2011



Charlie Sheen Says He Doesn't Like His Bosses "Nitpicking" Him:

CHARLIE SHEEN was a surprise caller yesterday morning on the radio show of ESPN's DAN PATRICK. And his bosses at "Two and a Half Men" can't be too happy about it, because he didn't hold back. --Charlie's voice was a little hoarse . . . and he explained why . . . quote, "I went back to work and was banging on the stage door, 'Hello, where is everybody?' I don't know what happened, I guess they're closed." --He added, quote, "Nobody told me. I just figured, you know, supposed to be back at work, 'cuz I'm ready . . . We're on forced hiatus, they said, 'You get ready, and we'll get ready,' and I got ready and went back, nobody's there. --"I don't know what to tell you. Nobody's there." (--In describing his voice, Charlie said, quote, "I sound like Demi Moore in her 80s.) --He also hinted that the producers have wanted to get rid of him before. Patrick joked about them not being able to start production on "One and a Half Men" . . . --And Charlie said, quote, "No, and that was clearly revealed when they HAD TO BRING ME BACK THIS YEAR. I'm here and I'm ready, they're not. Bring it." --Asked when production might start again, Charlie said, quote, "August of 2014 at this pace." (--He then admitted production is probably going to start on February 28th. On a separate note, there's word that four episodes are being cut from this year's schedule . . . which the crew isn't happy about.) --When Charlie says he's ready to work he means it. He told Patrick, quote, "I'm a man of my word, I have a contract. --"They said get your act together and I did, and . . . I think maybe it's a timing thing, they didn't think it was going to happen this fast." --He added, quote, "I heal really quickly, but I also unravel really quickly, so get me right now, guys. Get. Me. Right. Now." --Charlie also admitted there's a morals clause in his contract. But he added, quote, "Yeah, yeah, blah blah, nitpick nitpick, but I don't think it covers, 'Let us totally dominate and interfere with your personal life." --Oh, and Charlie revealed what he told members of the UCLA baseball team during his little pep talk last week. --He said, quote, "I said stay away from the crack. Which I think is good advice. Unless you can manage it socially, Dan. Because if you can manage it socially, go for it, but not a lot of people can, you know." --Patrick asked Charlie if HE thought he could manage it socially. And he admitted, quote, "Yeah, yeah, but that kind of blew up in my face. Like an exploding crack pipe." --But Charlie then said he's 100% CLEAN . . . quote, "Peeing clean . . . I feel great. I am here and ready. I'm actually hungry." --Charlie shed some light on what makes him want to party. It's BOREDOM. He said, quote, "The only thing that makes me want to party is when my brain says, 'It's on.' Usually at the wrong time. --"It tends to do with boredom. It's never been about, everyone else is drinking, I should too. It's about wanting to make things better, whether it's real or imagined." --While he hasn't misbehaved in a while, Charlie refuses to call himself "sober". He says, quote, "I don't use sober anymore. I'm not in AA, I don't believe in it. It's off and on." --One final note: Charlie said he would be spending Valentine's Day with his GIRLFRIEND. But he wouldn't say who she is. (--You can listen to the whole thing here. It's pretty long . . . but it's Charlie Sheen, so it's entertaining from start to finish.)

Some woman who dated Kevin Costner, Billy Idol and Johnny Depp Talks About Them In Her New Book:

Some woman who dated several Hollywood stars . . . including KEVIN COSTNER, BILLY IDOL and JOHNNY DEPP . . . has a new book out where she blabs about them. --Her name is PEGGY TRENTINI . . . and she's not just some groupie. She was a model and wannabe actress who made several movies in the '80s and '90s. --A lot of them were softcore sex flicks . . . but she also appeared on "Married . . . with Children" and in the movie "Tales from the Crypt: Demon Knight". She's in the real estate business now. --Anyway, her boyfriends also included Sylvester Stallone, Sting, Mick Jagger, Nicolas Cage, Sean Penn and Vince Neil. And she talks about them all in her new book, "Once Upon a Star: Celebrity Kiss and Tell Stories ". --In an interview with RadarOnline.com, Peggy says Costner was sexy and fun . . . but not somebody you'd want to get serious with. --She says, quote, "Kevin would have his friends bring girls to his house so he could meet as many as possible to find a hot girlfriend. --"He was so fun and flirty but I never took him seriously because my friends all told me he was a huge womanizer." --Peggy's favorite kisser was Billy Idol . . . although he was a little more VANILLA in the sack than you'd expect. She says, quote, "Billy was just an amazing kisser, he was so loving and attentive. --"And usually with rockers you expect them to be into really freaky stuff, but not Billy. He was so attentive to my needs and made sure I was having a good time." --And Depp was her most romantic boyfriend . . . quote, "On our first date he had a picnic blanket and champagne on the roof of his house, where we made love. He was so cerebral, he would talk for hours about world issues. He was amazing." (--You can purchase the book from this website . . . where you'll also find a pretty extensive photo gallery, in case you're curious about Peggy's looks.)
Tonya Harding Is Pregnant:

Former figure skating villain TONYA HARDING . . . America's true White Trash Princess . . . has been KNOCKED UP. --Her rep says, quote, "Tonya is pregnant and very happily married. She wants her privacy, but she is very happy." --Tonya married some guy named Joseph Price last June. The baby is due any day now. Tonya is 40 years old.

Irina Shayk is This Year's "Sports Illustrated" Swimsuit Cover Model:

A Russian model by the name of IRINA SHAYK is this year's "Sports Illustrated" swimsuit issue cover model. (--You can see a photo of this year's cover . . . along with video of Irina's photo shoot and a nice photo gallery . . . here.)

Did Lindsay Lohan and Samantha Ronson Spend Valentine's Day Together . . . As Friends?

Sources say that LINDSAY LOHAN and SAMANTHA RONSON were scheduled to spend Valentine's Day together . . . but as FRIENDS. --They weren't even going to be alone. The plan was to go out with a small group of friends to celebrate the birthday of Lindsay's entertainment manager. --A source says, quote, "At the moment Lindsay and Samantha are just friends. Nothing more, nothing less."

Eduardo Cruz Already Has Eva Longoria's Name Tattooed on His Arm:

EVA LONGORIA won't admit she's dating PENELOPE CRUZ'S little brother EDUARDO. But she doesn't have to. --Eduardo gave the game away by getting Eva's name tattooed on his arm. (--Check it out here.) --Eva split with San Antonio Spurs star TONY PARKER in November, after she found out he was exchanging naughty texts with an ex-teammate's wife. (--We still don't know if the affair ever got PHYSICAL.) --It's not clear when Eva and Eduardo first started hooking up. Their relationship hit the tabloids at the beginning of this month, but some sources claim they've been dating for up to two months. (--Eva is 35 . . . Eduardo is 25.)

Tiger Woods Was Fined for Spitting On a Golf Course:

TIGER WOODS has been fined by the European Tour for spitting on the green during the Dubai Desert Classic over the weekend. --Tour officials said Tiger, quote, "breached the tour code of conduct." There's no word how much he was fined. --Tiger later Tweeted, quote, "The Euro Tour is right . . . It was inconsiderate to spit like that and I know better. Just wasn't thinking and want to say I'm sorry." (--Tiger finished the tournament tied for 20th place. Here's video of his loogie.)

January Jones Likes Having the Paparazzi Around:

Not too many celebrities enjoy having the paparazzi around. But "Mad Men" actress JANUARY JONES does. She says, quote, "The weird thing is, it kind of makes me feel safe. --"I live alone and I feel like they're always watching. If someone were to come in and rob me, there's photographers. It's like the best security system ever." --That's not January's only security measure. Her bedroom door is made of steel and it's a foot thick. A friend who's a Navy SEAL gave it to her. She says, quote, "At night I crank it and it's a safe room."

Another "Inception" Star Has Joined the Cast of "The Dark Knight Rises":

French actress MARION COTILLARD has joined the cast of the next Batman movie, "The Dark Knight Rises". She's the third person director CHRISTOPHER NOLAN has brought over from his last movie, "Inception". --The other two are TOM HARDY . . . who's playing the villain Bane . . . and JOSEPH GORDON-LEVITT . . . whose character hasn't been revealed. There's also no word yet on Marion's character. --The only other newcomer announced so far is ANNE HATHAWAY, who'll be playing Selina Kyle. We assume she's also playing Selina's alter-ego, Catwoman. --They join returning cast members CHRISTIAN BALE as Batman, GARY OLDMAN as Commissioner Gordon, MORGAN FREEMAN as Lucius Fox and MICHAEL CAINE as Alfred the butler.

The New Spider-Man Movie Will Be Called "The Amazing Spider-Man":

Columbia Pictures has revealed the title of the new Spider-Man movie. You won't need to be sitting down because it's not very exciting. It's . . . "The Amazing Spider-Man", which is the title of his original comic book that started in the '60s. (--They also released a new, official photo of ANDREW GARFIELD in the Spider-Man costume. Check it out here.)

KCBS Reporter Serene Branson Did NOT Have a Stroke on TV:

KCBS-TV reporter SERENE BRANSON did NOT suffer a stroke on TV . . . and apparently, she's OK . . . so I guess it's safe to enjoy her gibberish once again. --Serene's post-Grammy live "report" on Sunday night straddled the line between seriously funny and seriously disturbing . . . depending on whether you believed she was just massively tongue-tied, or medically brain-fried. (--There's video, here.) --Yesterday, the affiliate issued a statement saying Serene was checked out, but contrary to some reports she did not suffer a stroke . . . quote, "Her vital signs were normal. She was not hospitalized. --"As a precautionary measure, a colleague gave her a ride home. And while Serene says she is feeling better today, she wants us to know she followed-up with a visit to the doctor for some medical tests. [She] hopes to be back on the air very soon."(--That still leaves HUGE questions. What did happen? Even though tests didn't uncover a medical problem, what else could it have been? I'm no expert, but there's no way she just got tongue-tied, is there?) (--If science can't explain it, I'm sorry, but I think I'm gonna have to go with demonic possession.)

Cinemax Is Changing Things Up a Little . . . But They're Not Dropping the Naughty "Skin-emax" Stuff:

The "New York Post" reports that Cinemax is in the midst of re-branding itself. --The network is launching some original content, including a new action show called "Strike Back" and another action series based on the "Transporter" movie franchise. More original shows may follow. --They're trying to kind of expand beyond their "Skinemax" reputation . . . But rest assured, they're NOT straying from the naughty, softcore late-night content that earned them that nickname. That stuff isn't going anywhere. --This "re-branding" effort serves another purpose, though. --Cinemax wants to look for ways to beef up their content . . . since people are watching movies through Netflix and other on-demand services, and don't depend on pay-cable for movies nearly as much anymore.

Tuesday TV Reminders: (--Check your local listings.)

--"Jump City" [SERIES Premiere] . . . 8:00 to 9:00 P.M. on G4. (--A show about "parkour", street acrobatics performed by urban athletes who quickly navigate the environment by jumping, climbing, and vaulting over any obstacles in their way.)

--"135th Westminster Kennel Club Dog Show" [Closing Night] . . . 8:00 to 11:00 P.M. on USA.

--"Only in America with Larry the Cable Guy" . . . 9:00 to 10:00 P.M. on History Channel. (--Larry visits a swamp infested with alligators, takes part in a soapbox derby and joins the clowns at Ringling Bros. and Barnum and Bailey Circus.)

--"The Good Wife" . . . 10:00 to 11:00 P.M. on CBS. (--In an episode inspired by "The Social Network", a young internet billionaire sues a film studio for allegedly defaming him in a movie.)

--"Parenthood" . . . 10:00 to 11:00 P.M. on NBC. (--"Lost's" Michael Emerson guest stars as a man with Asperger's syndrome who hosts Max's birthday.)

--"Hardcore Pawn" [3rd Season Premiere] . . . 10:00 to 10:30 P.M. on TruTV.

--"Our America with Lisa Ling" [SERIES Premiere] . . . 10:00 to 11:00 P.M. on OWN. (--Lisa Ling explores faith healing, those who believe in miracles and those who promise them.)

--"Waiting for 'Superman'" - Davis Guggenheim's documentary on the state of our education system, shown through the lives of five grade school kids. He's better known as the guy who did Al Gore's "An Inconvenient Truth".

--"Unstoppable" - Denzel Washington and "Star Trek's" Chris Pine try to stop a runaway train of hazardous chemicals before it hits a densely populated area. It's directed by Tony Scott, who's worked with Denzel on three other movies, including "Crimson Tide" and "Man on Fire". Rosario Dawson is also in it.

--"You Will Meet a Tall Dark Stranger" - A Woody Allen movie about romantic chaos caused by the predictions of a fake fortune teller. It stars Anthony Hopkins, Josh Brolin, Naomi Watts, and Antonio Banderas as Naomi's tall dark stranger.

--"Game of Death" - starring Wesley Snipes as a CIA hit man who's double crossed by his fellow agents during a mission to take out an arms dealer. It's a straight-to-DVD movie that's been described as "Die Hard" in a hospital.

TV Series On DVD:

--"Doctor Who: A Christmas Carol" . . . a single-disc DVD set.

--"Top Gear 15" . . . a two-disc DVD set of the British racing series. Season 15's guests included Tom Cruise, Cameron Diaz, and "Harry Potter's" Rupert Grint.

--"Top Gear 14" . . . a three-disc DVD set of the British racing series. Season 14's guests included Eric Bana, Chris Evans, and Guy Ritchie.

--"Spin City: Season 4" . . . a four-disc DVD set. (--It ran for six seasons.)


--"Lightning Strikes Twice", NELSON!!! (--Their first album in a decade, although it's now been TWO decades since the first lightning strike, when they dropped "(Can't Live Without Your) Love and Affection".)

--"Let England Shake", PJ Harvey (--This album has been earning some serious buzz, so if you're a fan . . . or have dug her in the past . . . you should check it out.)

--"Never Say Never - The Remixes", Justin Bieber (--A new song called "Born to Be Somebody", plus remixes featuring Rascal Flatts, Chris Brown and Kanye West.)

The Third "Marvel vs. Capcom" Hits Stores Today:

--"Marvel vs Capcom 3: Fate of Two Worlds" (T) . . . on Xbox360 and PS3.

This fighting game features a roster of three dozen characters from the Marvel Universe and Capcom franchises. The heavy hitters on Marvel's side include: Spider-Man, Thor, The Hulk, Iron Man, Captain America, Magneto, and Wolverine. Among the Capcom characters are . . . Chun-Li and Ryu from the "Street Fighter" games; Chris Redfield and Jill Valentine from "Resident Evil"; Dante and Trish from "Devil May Cry"; and Nathan Spencer from "Bionic Commando". --You can see all the playable characters here.)
(Trailer #1) (Trailer #2)

--"Hyperdimension Neptunia" (T) . . . on PS3. In this Japanese role playing game you play the goddess Neptune who is defending the world against the evil Arfoire. You can try and make some sense of trailer here.

--"Dragon Quest VI: Realms of Revelation" (T) . . . on the Nintendo DS. This is another remake of a classic Japanese RPG. It's the first time this version of "Dragon Quest" is available on American soil, and it includes updated graphics and mini-maps.

ESRB Game Ratings: (E) for Everyone; (T) for Teen; (M) for Mature (18+)
The Fall-Out From Justin Bieber's Grammy Loss:

Perhaps the most shocking moment of Sunday night's Grammys . . . not counting LADY GAGA'S weird egg birth . . . was when JUSTIN BIEBER was rejected, for what seems to be the first time in his life. --Justin was nominated for two awards . . . and in one of the categories, "Best New Artist" . . . he was a HEAVY favorite. But in the end, he lost out to a jazz musician named ESPERANZA SPALDING, who plays the upright bass. --Justin took the defeat with class, telling MTV, quote, "I'm not going to lie, I was disappointed. But, you know, I'm gonna come back next year and we'll take a few home." (--Here's video of Justin making these comments.) --Esperanza was "surprised" to hear her name, too. She said, quote, "I really didn't think it was going to be me . . . It was so unexpected, that's the truth." (--Here's video of Esperanza talking about her win.) --Naturally, Justin's fans went absolutely ballistic online after watching their golden boy being wronged like this . . . but Justin later attempted to calm the storm. --In a series of Twitter messages, he said, quote, "[It] was a great night. I got to perform at the Grammys with my mentor [Usher] and I feel like we did u guys proud. --"As for the awards, of course I wanted to win. It's been & still is a dream to win a Grammy. Was I upset . . . yes. But I was happy for [Esperanza] also. --"Someone said to me tonight it's not your successes that define u but your failures. I lost, but I don't plan on this being my last chance. I do this because I love it, and I do it for my family friends and fans who support me. --"I was grateful for the honor, and this is just the beginning." --Justin hadn't met Esperanza before the ceremony. But afterwards, he congratulated her backstage, and shook her hand. (--Here's video of Justin workin' Esperanza.) --Meanwhile, KANYE WEST shared his apparent disagreement with Justin's loss on Twitter, but he kept himself in check. --He said, quote, "Damn . . . I can't find the words to explain how I feel about the Best New Artist award. Don't wanna say the wrong thing. #PROUDOFJUSTIN." --And GAME also chimed in on Twitter, but he was pulling for DRAKE to win, not Justin. In between joints, he said, quote, "Drake ain't win Best New Artist? Exactly why I'm kool on awards. (Finishes rolling weed up as I turn the TV off). --"You wouldn't care about AWARDS if you seen the people giving em'. 'WHO DA (EFF) ARE Y'ALL?' . . . cheated the homie."

Johnny Depp Is a "Belieber":

This just in: JOHNNY DEPP is a "BELIEBER". --Johnny got to meet JUSTIN BIEBER at a recent press event for Johnny's new movie "Rango". --And on Sunday, Johnny told MTV that his kids were jealous that he got to meet Justin face-to-face before they did . . . quote, "My [11-year-old] daughter was most definitely jealous. Justin, bless him, he's a very sweet guy. --"He had a pair of [his purple] glasses in his pocket, [and] he said, 'Oh yeah, give these to Lily-Rose.' She was very chuffed about that. She was very touched. He's a good guy . . . a sweet kid." (--Here's video of Johnny's comments.) --In a separate interview, Johnny added he was shocked to meet Justin at the "Rango" event, because he'd just been talking about Justin before he showed up. --Johnny said, quote, "It was the first time I had heard the term, a 'Belieber,' and I admitted that I was a Belieber and he magically appears . . . there he was. [Now] I'm riddled with Bieber Fever." (--Enjoy a video of Justin showing off his ball-handling skills with the Harlem Globetrotters backstage at "Lopez Tonight", here.)

Surprise! Radiohead Is Putting Out an Album This Weekend, But This Time There Is a Price Tag:

RADIOHEAD has mastered the sneak attack. -Yesterday, they suddenly announced that their next album, "The King of Limbs", will be coming out THIS SATURDAY. --Radiohead's last album "In Rainbows" was also released about a week after a surprise announcement, which included the details for their infamous "pay-whatever-you-want" plan. But now, they're switching to a pay-what-Radiohead-wants system. --Here's how it works: You can preorder the album at TheKingOfLimbs.com. It'll run you $9 for MP3s . . . or $14 for higher-quality WAV files. You'll then be able to download the album beginning on Saturday. --Or you can select a deluxe package, which will also get you a physical copy of the album when it is released on May 9th. --If you want, you can shell out $50 for a "newspaper album," which includes: "Two clear 10-inch vinyl records in a purpose-built record sleeve, a CD, many large sheets of artwork, 625 tiny pieces of artwork and a full-color piece of oxo-de-gradeable plastic to hold it all together." (--If you order that, you'll also be able to download the album this weekend.)
El DeBarge Is in Rehab:

Did you notice that EL DEBARGE was nominated for two Grammys this year? He didn't win anything, but he was up for Best R&B Song and Best Male R&B Vocal Performance. --The nominations were for his album "Second Chance" . . . which is his first album in 16 years. Well, it looks like he's going to need a THIRD chance. --Yesterday, El DeBarge announced that he was putting himself in rehab. He said, quote, "I hate to disappoint my fans, but it is necessary for me to take the time to work on me so that I may continue to share my music and my story with everyone." --El DeBarge was scheduled to begin a tour with KEM and LEDISI on Thursday in Houston, but that gig . . . along with all his other future shows and appearances . . . has been canceled. MUSIQ SOULCHILD is taking his place on the tour. (--The details of his treatment weren't released, but it is said to be a DRUG rehab facility. In 2001, DeBarge was arrested for cocaine possession. In 2006, he was popped again for having a controlled substance . . .) (--In 2007, he was arrested for cocaine possession. He was given probation . . . but in 2008, he was caught with crack and other "drug paraphernalia," and was sentenced to two years behind bars. He got out in October of 2009.)

Lady Gaga Says Madonna Is OK with "Born This Way":

LADY GAGA has responded to the accusations that her new song "Born This Way" rips off MADONNA'S song "Express Yourself", which came out in 1989. -Last night, she told JAY LENO, quote, "There is really no one that is a more adoring and loving Madonna fan than me. I am the hugest fan personally and professionally." --Madonna never commented on this publicly, but someone did post a video of Madonna performing "Express Yourself" on her official YouTube page the day the "controversy" broke out. --But Lady Gaga said she heard from her . . . and Madonna is cool with it. --She said quote, "Well, the good news is that I got an e-mail from her people and her, sending me their love and complete support on behalf of the single . . . and if the queen says it shall be, then it shall be." (--At the Grammys Sunday night, Lady Gaga thanked WHITNEY HOUSTON for inspiring "Born This Way".)

Eminem Wore a Sobriety Necklace at the Grammys:

If you were paying attention to EMINEM'S bling during his seven-minute performance at the Grammys on Sunday, you would've noticed his SOBRIETY NECKLACE. --It was the circle and triangle symbol used by Alcoholics Anonymous. (--The triangle represents "the three-part answer: Unity, recovery and service . . . to a three-part disease: Physical, mental and spiritual . . . while the circle represents wholeness or oneness." You can see it, here.) --Regardless of how effective it's been at keeping him sober, it wasn't exactly a good luck charm . . . as Eminem only came home with two of the 10 awards he was up for.


ASHTON KUTCHER thinks GEORGE W. BUSH snubbed him at the Super Bowl. (Full Story)

ASHLEE SIMPSON and PETE WENTZ had a Valentine's Day lunch with their son Bronx at the Beverly Hills Hotel. (Full Story)

DAVID BECKHAM had filed a $25 million defamation lawsuit against "In Touch Weekly" for claiming he had multiple encounters with a high-priced hooker. Yesterday, he lost . . . but he's vowing to fight on. (Full Story)

WHOOPI GOLDBERG is upset that she was not mentioned in a "New York Times" article about how seldom black actors have won Oscars. Whoopi won hers for "Ghost" in 1991. (Full Story)

MICHAEL VICK will be on "Oprah" next Thursday. (Full Story)

Sunday night's "Grammys" were watched by 26.5 million people. That's the show's highest audience in 10 years. (Full Story)

ROSEANNE is getting a new show on Lifetime, in which cameras will follow her around as she tries to run a macadamia nut farm in Hawaii. For real. (Full Story)



A Man In Oregon Channels His Middle School Basketball Skills To Catch a Baby Who Was Tossed Out of a Burning Building:

Millions of kids play middle school basketball, then quit before high school, because they realize they're both terrible at basketball, and white. But you never know when that eighth grade ballin' experience is going to come through HUGE. --24-year-old Jeff Bryant of Milwaukie, Oregon was walking out of his apartment around 9:30 A.M. on Saturday when he heard alarms and saw black smoke coming out of a building nearby. --He also spotted a woman on the second floor with a BABY in her hands. Jeff dropped his coffee cup, ran over, and yelled at the woman to TOSS her baby to him. --She asked, quote, "Are you sure you'll catch him?" Jeff says he was sure he would. After all, he says, he played middle school basketball and was a solid rebounder. Plus, uh, this was a higher stakes situation. --The woman was 24-year-old Kimberly Hasty. She trusted Jeff . . . and his rusty basketball skills . . . and tossed her one-year-old son to him. He caught the baby. (--And no, he didn't spike the baby onto the ground, like in the joke.) --Then Kimberly jumped out of the window as the flames spread. --Tragically, two of Kimberly's other sons died in the fire . . . her four- and five-year-old sons were trapped in their rooms and couldn't get out. But thanks to Jeff, Kimberly and her baby survived. (CNN)

An 84-Year-Old Man Is Stranded In the Desert For Five Days and Survives . . . By Drinking Windshield Fluid:

Henry Morello of Anthem, Arizona, is a BADASS 84-year-old. WAY more badass than any of us much, much younger punks. He has every right to yell at us if we walk on his gott-damm lawn . . . we don't DESERVE to walk there --Last week, Henry was driving and missed his exit off of Interstate 17. He took the next exit, ended up driving about 17 miles down a dirt road, then turned off the road . . . and his car got stuck in the desert. --And Henry, at age 84, survived FIVE DAYS of being completely stranded . . . thanks to his ridiculously brilliant survival skills. --He opened the hood of his car, used a rock to bust the container of windshield wiper fluid . . . then filtered it by pouring it into a napkin. That gave him a liquid that was safe to drink, so he could stay hydrated. --As for food, he had a few dinner leftovers in the car, and managed to stretch them for five days. When it got freezing in the desert at night, he used his floor mats to cover himself up and stay warm. --Finally, after five days, a helicopter spotted him. Rescue crews found him in good condition. He was taken to a hospital but is expected to fully recover and be out within the week. (CBS 5 - Phoenix)

One Out of Three People Say It's Possible To Fall In Love Online . . . Without Ever Meeting Face-To-Face:

Falling in love with someone face-to-face is for old folks. In this day and age, people are more than happy to fall in love FACEBOOK-TO-FACEBOOK. --According to a new study, more than one out of three Americans say they believe it's possible to fall in love online . . . without ever meeting the person face-to-face. --Men are more likely to say that's possible than women . . . but people of both genders do believe in real love springing out of only virtual connections. --39% of men say they've flirted online, versus 23% of women. --More than half of Americans say the Internet has made it easier for people to CHEAT . . . and a VERY HIGH 31% say they know someone whose real-life relationship ended because of their actions online. (PR Newswire)

23% of Women Bought Themselves Flowers For Valentine's Day . . . As Did 0% of Men:

If you're male, you didn't have a Valentine yesterday, and you bought YOURSELF flowers to feel better about yourself . . . congratulations. You are the most unique man on the planet. --According to a survey about flower buying on Valentine's Day, yesterday, 23% of women who got flowers purchased them for themselves. And 0% of men purchased flowers for themselves. So if you did, stand up, because you have not been counted. (Broken Secrets)

Republicans Are More Romantic Than Democrats . . . And Both Are More Romantic Than Independents:

According to a new poll, Republicans are more romantically involved than Democrats or Independents. --44% of the Republicans surveyed say they're excited about their love lives, versus only 32% of Democrats and 31% of independents. --The survey also found that people with MONEY are happy with their sex lives. 47% of people with incomes over $100,000 are happy with the romance in their lives and pants, versus 27% of people who make under $50,000-a-year. (Los Angeles Times)

A New Study Finds There's One Occasion Where It's Actually Safer To Drive and Talk On Your Phone:

Unless you're willfully ignorant . . . or worse, you willfully ignore OPRAH . . . you've heard how dangerous it is to talk on your cell phone while you're driving. Experts say it can be even more dangerous than driving drunk. --Well, a study from the University of Kansas just found the one occasion where it's actually SAFER to drive and talk on your phone. --Researchers found that when you're doing a long, boring drive, it's SAFER to get on the phone toward the end of the drive. --In the study, they found that people who'd been driving for hours on flat, boring monotonous roads started losing concentration toward the end of the drive. --By talking on the phone, it actually makes your brain wake up and it keeps you sharper. That extra concentration more than makes up for the distraction. --Paul Atchley led the study. He says, quote, "The takeaway message is that it's almost always dangerous to talk and drive, but there might be some limited situations where cellular technology can improve safety." (Topeka Capital-Journal)

Police in Oklahoma Say a Headless Woman Died of . . . Natural Causes? What?

Yeah, this really doesn't add up. In Tulsa, Oklahoma, police found the body of a 55-year-old woman, dead in her home. She was HEADLESS. And the cause of death was ruled . . . natural causes? --Here's how they got from point A to point B on THAT. The woman hadn't been seen since Christmas day. They believe she died in late December or early January from natural causes. --As for the disappearing head . . . well, the police believe that the woman's dogs were starving, so they started EATING HER BODY. And that included chewing off her head and dragging it to a different part of the house. --The cops found the head in a different room than the body. Have a great day! (CBS)

Clothing Prices Will All Be Going Up 10% This Spring:

If you've been saving your nickels because gas prices are going to ruthlessly violate you this spring . . . better start tossing some quarters in there so you can afford new Capri pants too. --According to a report by CNBC, clothing prices across the board are going to go up at least 10% this spring. --Cotton has doubled in price over the past year and other synthetic fabrics are up 50% . . . and the manufacturers will be passing that increased cost on to YOU. (CNBC)


A Male Nurse Is Seriously Injured After Being Beaten Up By a Patient With No Legs and Only One Arm:

I hate to blame a victim . . . but in this case, the victim is REALLY going to have to come up with a good story to explain his injuries to his friends. Because this is pretty embarrassing. --The victim in this case is a 50-year-old male nurse . . . or "murse" . . . at the Royal Darwin Hospital in the Northwest Territory of Australia. A few weeks ago, he was tending to a male patient who had NO LEGS and only ONE ARM. --And . . . the male nurse got BEAT UP by the one-limbed man. --According to the news report, quote, "The [nurse] was trying to handle the disabled man when the man punched the [nurse] repeatedly with his good arm and flailed his stumps angrily." --A large security guard had to come in to help restrain the man and his flailing stumps. --The male nurse suffered a serious knee injury and is now off work while he recovers. --There's no word on whether the one-limbed man was charged with assault, or why he decided to attack the murse. (Northern Territory News)

A 400-Pound Woman Gets Caught Shoplifting From a Grocery Store When Her Motorized Cart Gets Stuck In the Door:

--The woman here is 30-year-old Jerrie Perkins of Pontiac, Michigan . . . who's five-foot-two and tips the scales at an UNTHINKABLY SEXY 400 POUNDS. Last week, Jerrie was riding her motorized cart through a Meijer grocery store in Rochester Hills, Michigan . . . and shoplifting everything in sight. -She'd jammed more than $600 worth of merchandise into her cart . . . mostly electronics . . . when she decided to make a run for it. And by "run," we mean a slow, slow ride out the door. --There was only one problem. SHE GOT STUCK. In the door. Just as all her stolen merchandise was setting off the alarm. --When she got stuck, it gave the store employees a chance to run over and see why the alarm was going off. And also, possibly, to help get her unstuck. But mostly because of the alarm. --They found the stolen merchandise and called the cops. When they arrived, Jerrie got loose . . . and they ended up having to use the TASER on her when she cocked her fist to take a swing at one of them. --She was arrested and charged with unarmed robbery, resisting and obstructing a police officer, and second-degree retail fraud. (Macomb Daily)

In Florida, A Drunk Driver Is Arrested and Confesses That He'd Been Drinking For Two Or Three Days:

This guy needs to be taken off the roads FOREVER. Do whatever it takes. Seriously. It doesn't get more dangerous than this a-hole. --The man is a 47-year-old from Destin, Florida, whose name hasn't been released. Over the weekend, he was driving drunk with a suspended license and caused an accident. --Fortunately, no one was badly hurt. Unfortunately, HE wasn't badly hurt either . . . so it seems like he still didn't learn his lesson. --When the cops got there and asked him if he'd been drinking, he told them he'd been drinking heavily for two or three . . . DAYS. --He had a blood-alcohol level of .302 at the time, which is getting close to LETHAL levels. --He was arrested and hit with several charges . . . but for some reason, ALL of them are misdemeanors. (Northwest Florida Daily News)


Disturbing News: One of the guys from the VISA 'Never Miss a Super Bowl Club' . . . the one who missed the most recent Super Bowl . . . died last week. He was the one with the white goatee. Robert Cook was 79, but his family didn't release the exact cause of his death. (Full Story)

How big is PRESIDENT OBAMA'S $3.73 trillion budget? It could pay for 5,006 Obama '08 presidential campaigns . . . the stack of bills would be as tall as 2.4 million Washington monuments . . . it could buy the Yankees 2331 times over . . . and it could give each American $12,000. (Full Story)

A Connecticut town recently got so much snow, the roof of the public works garage collapsed on Friday night . . . and buried the town's snowplows under snow. (Full Story)

Laughing gas is making a comeback . . . as a way for moms in labor to combat pain. (Full Story)


#1.) A College Student Tried to Make a Crazy Dunk During Halftime at a Phoenix Suns Game . . . And Ended Up Dunking HIMSELF:

Last month, a college student named Nicholas Corrales was taking part in an acrobatic dunk contest during halftime at a Phoenix Suns game . . . and it didn't go the way he planned. --Nicholas ran across the court, jumped on a trampoline, and launched into the air. But he jumped too far . . . and ended up going through the hoop HIMSELF. FACE-FIRST. --It was so good, it looked like he did it on purpose. But apparently he didn't. And he's on today's "Ellen DeGeneres Show" to talk about it. (--Search for "Man Dunks Himself Through Hoop." It happens at :10.)

#2.) Justin Bieber Said the Word "Like" 63 Times In 11 Minutes:

JUSTIN BIEBER was on "The Tonight Show" last month, and someone counted all the times he said the word "like". During the 11-minute interview, he said it 63 times. And there's a montage of all of them on StupidVideos.com. (--Search StupidVideos.com for "Justin Bieber Loves the Word Like")

#3.) Some Guy Proposed to His Girlfriend In the Food Court of a Shopping Mall . . . And She Ran Away:

Some guy proposed to his girlfriend in a shopping mall food court, and the girl just stood there for a while, mostly with her hands over her face, then ran away. But the whole thing looks like it could have been staged. Check it out online and decide for yourself. (--Search Break.com for "Food Court Proposal Gone Wrong." She runs away at 1:33.)

#4.) Check Out a New Extreme Sport Called "Canyon Swing-Lining":

Here's another crazy sport you've probably never heard of: It's called "canyon swing-lining." You string mountain climbing ropes across a canyon, then attach another rope to the middle of it and swing from one end of the canyon to the other. --It looks like fun . . . if your idea of fun involves soiling yourself in sheer terror. (--Search YouTube for "Canyon Swing-Lining in Utah". The first guy swings about 15 seconds in, but there's a better view of what's going on about 49 seconds in.)

You're More Likely to Find Your Future Spouse at Work Than Through Online Dating:

According to CareerBuilder's annual office romance survey, 31% of people have dated a co-worker at some point in their career. And 38% of them ended up MARRYING that person. --Those are better odds than basically any online dating website. And workplace romances aren't as taboo as they used to be: 34% of people who are currently dating someone at work said they're not keeping it a secret. --But if you're among the 9% who want to bone a co-worker right now, think about this before you act on it: 6% of people who've dated someone in their office said they ended up leaving their job because of it. They either quit, or they were fired. --And guys are much more inclined to start an office romance than women are. Of the men who said they're currently interested in someone in their office, 16% of them would actually DATE the person, compared to just 2% of women. --But that doesn't mean you have ZERO chance of dating your co-worker. You just have to find the right time and place to hit it off. 18% of people who've dated a co-worker said their relationship started at lunch. --And here are a few other common situations where people said their office romances started:

#1.) During happy hour . . . obviously, because the drinking loosens you up.

#2.) During a holiday party . . . for basically the same reason.

#3.) While you're both working late at the office . . . because you're alone together.

#4.) During a business trip . . . because you're alone together AND you can have filthy hotel sex. (AOL.com)


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