Friday, June 10, 2011



Kim Kardashian Has Officially Threatened to Sue Bret Lockett:

KIM KARDASHIAN has officially threatened to sue New England Patriots safety BRET LOCKETT if he doesn't stop saying he had sex with Kim and retract his previous statements. --Kim's attorney sent a letter to Bret's rep saying, quote, "To put it very plainly and clearly, and as Mr. Lockett knows, there is not now, and never has been such a relationship.\ --"Ms. Kardashian does not know and has never even met Mr. Lockett." (--You can read the letter here.)

Bret Lockett Wants to be a Rapper:

If BRET LOCKETT is lying about dating KIM KARDASHIAN, I think I know why: Dude wants to be a RAPPER. And this is an excellent way to get a little publicity. (--And Kim should know about that. Her family's entire entertainment dynasty was built off the back of her sex tape with RAY-J.) --He even has a video on YouTube for a song called "Let's Go". It's all very pro. I don't think Bret went to the same people REBECCA BLACK did. (???) (--Check out the video here.) (--It's terrible in a harmless kind of way . . . except for this line. Quote, "Damn girl, you're amazing, Why you squintin' like you're Asian." That happens at the two-minute mark.)

Kim Kardashian's Prenup Protects Anything She Earns During Her Marriage:

KIM KARDASHIAN is taking no chances when it comes to protecting her assets from potential future ex-husband KRIS HUMPHRIES. --Their prenup basically states that Kris gets NOTHING if they split . . . including whatever Kim earns during the marriage. Kim's mom, KRIS JENNER, reportedly drew up the contract. --Humphries makes $3.2 million a year paying for the New Jersey Nets, and didn't have a problem signing. A source says, quote, "He agreed to that. He's not worried." (--Kim is worth an estimated $35 million. Kris is worth about $8 million.)

Khloe Kardashian Said Everyone Needs a Prenup Because "People Are Crazy" . . . And Her Husband Was Standing Right Next to Her:

If you're going to talk about how great prenups are, you might want to do it when your spouse isn't standing RIGHT NEXT TO YOU. --KHLOE KARDASHIAN doesn't have that kind of class. With husband LAMAR ODOM at her side, she told E! News, quote, "We have a prenup, prenups are . . . do you know what kind of day and age this is? Everybody needs a prenup!" --She added, quote, "I mean, I don't care if you make $5 or $5 million, in this day and age . . . people are crazy, you never know. --"And when you have businesses together, like we do, you have to protect yourself. It doesn't mean you don't love them." (--Check out video here.) (--So basically, Khloe is saying she loves Lamar . . . but she's not convinced that they won't break up . . . and she doesn't trust him not to go insane and try to take all her money if they do.) (--And he's STANDING RIGHT THERE as she says it.)

Weston Cage's Mother Blames Nicolas for His Behavior:

It's still not clear what happened between WESTON CAGE and that other guy outside an L.A. restaurant Tuesday night . . . or what condition Weston is currently in. --But Weston's mom, CHRISTINA FULTON, isn't happy about it . . . and she blames Weston's dad, NICOLAS CAGE. --Fulton . . . who was never married to Nic . . . was spotted by the paparazzi outside the hospital shortly after Weston went in. And she gave them an earful. --She said, quote, "My son is in trouble. He's in the hospital right now, and he's under some really good care, so that makes me very happy. --"But I'm pretty pissed off because his father . . . he's affected by his father and that is why he's in that hospital tonight. And that's all I have to say." (--Watch the video here.)
The Man Who Beat Up Weston Cage May Have Been His High School Wrestling Coach:

The man who beat up 20-year-old WESTON CAGE the other day may not have been his "personal trainer", as he's been described in numerous reports. says he's Kevin Villegas . . . Weston's former wrestling coach at Beverly Hills High School. He's also a martial arts expert. --Apparently, Villegas was hired to "protect" Weston, whatever that means. And it's starting to look like he may not have been acting solely in self-defense. --A source says, quote, "He deliberately provoked Weston, and he wouldn't stop even though people were telling him to. He could have easily subdued Weston. Weston was defenseless." --Weston reportedly took 13 shots to the face and needed eight stitches. --TMZ says Weston wants to pursue criminal charges against Villegas. --Police are still trying to determine who's at fault. We heard previously that Weston started the fight by trying to roundhouse-kick Villegas. --Obviously, Villegas has lost his job as Weston's "protector."

Little Person Peter Dinklage Is Going to be A Dad:

Actor PETER DINKLAGE from HBO's "Game of Thrones" is going to be a dad. He plays Tyrion Lannister on the show. --As you probably know, Peter is a "little person." He's 4-foot-5. Before "Game of Thrones", you probably knew him best as the children's author who beat up WILL FERRELL in "Elf". --His wife Erica Schmidt is average height. There's no word when she's due. (--Here's a picture of them together.) (Pop Crunch)

"Hairspray" Star Nikki Blonsky is Dating a Sexy Male Model:

Candy-coated "Hairspray" star NIKKI BLONSKY has snagged herself a pretty hot piece of action. His name is Tommy Potoeski, and he's a model and aspiring actor.--The two of them were spotted making out in New York City the other day. (--Check out a picture here.) (People)

Toni Braxton Might Not Pose for "Playboy" Because of Her Sons:

TONI BRAXTON has been asked to pose for "Playboy". And even at 43 she's easily hot enough to pull it off. But she might not do it because of her sons. --She says, quote, "I was going to say yes immediately, but then I said, 'I have kids and they're 8 and 9, and they're going through the booby stage.' --"They're noticing boobies. I don't want their friends to say, 'I saw your mom's boobies in my dad's bathroom!'"

Alec Baldwin Blames Technology for the Anthony Weiner Scandal:

This just in: Congressman ANTHONY WEINER is NOT to blame for texting pictures of his junk to other women behind his wife's back. The true culprit here is TECHNOLOGY. --At least that's what ALEC BALDWIN seems to be implying. --In a blog on "The Huffington Post", Alec says, quote, "Appointment sex with your spouse doesn't always arrive when you need it most. --"A modern cell phone, loaded with contacts of willing fellow players, has a table with a red checkered table cloth ready for you at virtually any time. --"We tell ourselves that these devices help us communicate more effectively. What they actually do is allow us to bypass the person lying right next to us, across the room from us or at an airport heading home to us, in order to meet our immediate, even inconvenient, needs. --"Weiner is a modern human being. So he ensnared himself in things that modern humans do. When I first heard about his problems, I snickered and made jokes, too. Now, I'm sad for him, his family, his district and his colleagues." --He did add, however, that ego played a part as well . . . quote, "For high functioning men like Weiner and other officials who have lived through such scandals, who are constantly on the go, that leaves one tried and true source of a reliable high. --"The affirmation that comes when someone lets you know they want to sleep with you. Or even cyber-sleep with you." (--You can read the whole thing here.)

Larry Birkhead Told His Daughter Dannielynn That Her Mom, Anna Nicole Smith, is "Up in the Clouds":

ANNA NICOLE SMITH'S daughter Dannielynn will be five years old in September, if you can believe that. So she's obviously asking questions about her mother. --Her dad, LARRY BIRKHEAD, told "Us Weekly" how he explained Anna Nicole's death to her. --He said, quote, "Dannielynn knows that her mom passed away. She obviously doesn't know the details. --"At first I said, 'Your mommy's up in the clouds.' Then we were on a plane from Kentucky and she asked, 'Which cloud is my mom on, maybe she can come play?' You have to be forthright but keep it on a kid-friendly level." (--He's not really lying. Anna Nicole spent most of her time in the clouds even BEFORE she died.) --Larry also said the similarities between Dannielynn and Anna Nicole are striking . . . quote, "I see her mom in everything she does. --"We were at the Kentucky Derby and she started smiling and posing like her mom would. People ask me to put her in modeling, but I don't want to push." (--I shudder to think that Dannielynn will turn out JUST like her mother . . . for obvious reasons. But you can tell already that she's definitely going to have the looks. Here are a few recent photos.) (Sources: PopEater, Us Weekly, Daily Mail)

Estella Warren Has Been Charged with DUI, Hit-and-Run and Battery on a Cop:

Remember "Kangaroo Jack" superstar ESTELLA WARREN'S little DUI hit-and-run fiasco a few weeks ago? Well, Estella was charged yesterday, and they rang her up pretty good. --They charged her with DUI, hit-and-run, battery on a police officer and resisting arrest. Lucky for her they're all misdemeanors, so she's "only" looking at a total of two and a half years in prison. (--Of which we all know she'll end up serving ZERO.) --Estella got wasted and then got behind the wheel back on May 23rd. She slammed into THREE parked cars and tried to leave the scene. Then she kicked a cop who tried to arrest her. --When she got to the police station, she slipped out of her handcuffs and tried to bolt out the back door. --Estella actually got lucky with the timing there. Cops wanted to hit her with a charge of FELONY ESCAPE, which is actually WORSE than DUI . . . but they couldn't, because they hadn't booked her yet when she tried to skate. --Estella . . . who was convicted of DUI in 2007 . . . is currently free on $100,000 bail.


"Super 8" Hits Theaters Today . . . And Be Sure to Stay for the End Credits:

#1.) "Super 8" (PG-13)

It's set in 1979, when a group of kids making a movie on 'Super 8' millimeter film accidentally capture footage of a military train crash. And when they watch it . . . they notice something alien escaping from the wreckage. --It's the long-awaited sci-fi collaboration between Steven Spielberg and J.J. Abrams . . . the guy behind "Lost" and the "Star Trek" reboot. Abrams directed it, Spielberg produced it, and "Super 8" has already been compared to Spielberg's early movies "E.T." and "The Goonies". --Elle Fanning is one of the kids, and Kyle Chandler from "Friday Night Lights" is the town sheriff and the father of one of the boys. You'll also want to stick around for the end credits, which is when they reveal the full version of the super 8 movie that the kids were making before all the chaos started. (Trailer #1) (Trailer #2)

#2.) "Judy Moody and the Not Bummer Summer" (PG)

This is a kids' movie based on the "Judy Moody" book series. It's about a third grader who decides to evaluate the quality of her summer break by assigning points to every fun and exciting thing that she and her friends do. --Heather Graham plays her aunt Opal, and Judy is played by a little girl named Jordana Beatty. (Trailer)

The Kid Who Plays Teddy in "The Hangover Part 2" is Director Ang Lee's Son:

Here's something you may not have known: MASON LEE . . . the kid who plays Teddy in "The Hangover Part 2" . . . is the son of director ANG LEE. (--Teddy is the kid they lose and spend the rest of the movie trying to find. Ang Lee is the director of "Sense and Sensibility", "Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon" and "Brokeback Mountain".) --Ang Lee says, quote, "My son's performance was quite good. He is quite a serious actor but this is just a comedy."

"Sex and the City" Star Chris Noth Gives "The Hangover Part 2" A Minor Dis:

CHRIS NOTH . . . who plays "Sex and the City's" Mr. Big . . . was discussing the critical bashing that "Sex and the City 2" received. And in the process, he delivered a minor dis to "The Hangover Part 2". --He said, quote, "I thought a lot of the reviews were personal and derogatory, and in bad taste. It was only a movie, for god sakes! Was it really that much worse than 'Hangover 2'? I mean, come on. Really."
Will Jake Pavelka and Vienna Girardi Be Reunited on "Bachelor Pad 2"?

Word has it that JAKE PAVELKA and VIENNA GIRARDI will be "reunited" on the second season of "Bachelor Pad". And not "reunited" in the good way. --Jake and Vienna broke up last June . . . just months after Vienna accepted Jake's proposal on the season finale of "The Bachelor's" 14th season. --The break-up wasn't pretty. Jake accused Vienna of being unfaithful, and Vienna countered by calling Jake a, quote, "fame whore." But their reunion is going to be even MORE awkward than it sounds. --So-called sources tell "Entertainment Weekly" that the cast will also include Vienna's current boyfriend, Kasey Kahl . . . who was also on the sixth season of "The Bachelorette", chasing after Ali Fedotowsky. (--And before she scored her "Bachelorettte" gig, Ali was one of the women chasing Jake, but she removed herself because of a work conflict. Awkward.) --The unofficial "Bachelor Pad" cast list also includes: --Justin Rego, who's also from Ali's season of "The Bachelorette" . . . Erica Rose, from "Bachelor" Lorenzo Borghese's season . . . and Michelle Money and Jackie Gordon, who were on Brad Womack's most recent run on "The Bachelor". --By the way, Jake's appearance will mean he's hit for the cycle . . . appearing on all three "Bachelor" shows. Before becoming the center of attention on "The Bachelor", he competed for Jillian Harris' love on the fifth season of "The Bachelorette". (--Doesn't all of this seem a little incestuous? It's no wonder none of these morons ever find legitimate love. They get more money and attention playing the "Bachelor" game in CAREER MODE than in SINGLE GAME MODE.)

Parents Can Relax, MTV Has Canceled "Skins":

Parents everywhere can relax. MTV has canceled "Skins" . . . the show the Parents Television Council called, quote, "The most dangerous show for children that we have ever seen." (--Of course, that's a hyperbole . . . like everything else the PTC says. It wasn't even the most "dangerous show for children" on MTV. That honor would have to go to "Teen Mom", "16 and Pregnant" or "Jersey Shore". Take your pick.) --"Skins" lasted just 10 low-rated episodes. MTV said, quote, "'Skins' is a global television phenomenon that, unfortunately, didn't connect with a U.S. audience as much as we had hoped." --And the PTC said, quote, "It's not always true that controversy simply draws an audience. MTV's decision to cancel 'Skins' is not much of a surprise . . . we're pleased that MTV has made a responsible decision."

Danny Glover Has Been Cast in Kiefer Sutherland's New Show:

DANNY GLOVER has been cast in KIEFER SUTHERLAND'S upcoming drama, "Touch". Kiefer plays a father whose autistic, 10-year-old son has the ability to "predict events before they happen." --Danny's role will be: "A professor and expert on children who possess special gifts when it comes to numbers." (--In other words, a combination of ROBIN WILLIAMS and MATT DAMON in "Good Will Hunting". The show will premiere on Fox sometime next winter.)

Friday TV Reminders:

--"NHL Stanley Cup Finals" [Game 5] . . . 8:00 to 11:00 P.M. Eastern on NBC. (--The Vancouver Canucks host the Boston Bruins.)

--"Guys Choice Awards 2011" . . . 9:00 to 11:00 P.M. on Spike TV. (--Jennifer Aniston picked up the Decade of Hotness award and Justin Timberlake presented the Holy Grail of Hotness trophy to his "Friends With Benefits" co-star Mila Kunis.) (--Here are the nominees . . . and here are the previously announced winners. The awards were taped last weekend.)

--"Camelot" [1st Season Finale] . . . 10:00 to 11:00 P.M. on Starz.

--"Storytellers" [Special Presentation] . . . 11:00 P.M. to Midnight on VH1. (--Ray LaMontagne performs and discusses his music.)

Saturday TV Reminders:

--"Belmont Stakes" . . . 5:00 to 7:00 P.M. Eastern on NBC.

--"Grand Ole Opry Live" . . . 7:00 to 9:00 P.M. on GAC. (--Thompson Square, Anna Wilson, Mandy Barnett and Crystal Bowersox perform.)

--"Field Of Vision" . . . 8:00 to 10:00 P.M. on NBC. (--Faith Ford stars in this made-for-TV movie about a kid who finds shocking footage on an old video camera.)

--"Austin City Limits" . . . 9:00 to 10:00 P.M. on PBS. (--Lyle Lovett and Friends perform.) (REPEAT)

--"My Ghost Story" [2nd Season Finale] . . . 10:00 to 11:00 P.M. on Biography.

--"McEnroe & Borg: Fire & Ice" . . . 10:00 to 11:00 P.M. on HBO. (--This documentary examines the great tennis rivalry between John McEnroe and Bjorn Borg.)

--"Saturday Night Live" . . . 11:30 P.M. to 1:00 A.M. on NBC. (--Miley Cyrus guest hosts and The Strokes is the musical guest.) (REPEAT)

Sunday TV Reminders:

--"The NBA Finals" [Game 6] . . . 8:00 to 10:30 P.M. Eastern on ABC. (--The Miami Heat host the Dallas Mavericks. "Jimmy Kimmel Game Night" will air before the finals on the East Coast . . . and after the game on the West Coast.)

--"The 65th Annual Tony Awards" . . . 8:00 to 11:00 P.M. on CBS. (--Neil Patrick Harris is your host.) (--Here are the nominees.)

--"So Random!" . . . 9:00 to 9:30 P.M. on Disney Channel. (--Greyson Chance guest stars as himself and performs "Waiting Outside the Lines".)

--"The Glee Project" [SERIES Premiere] . . . 9:00 to 10:00 P.M. on Oxygen. (--Twelve people compete for a seven-episode guest-stint on "Glee".)

--"Army Wives" [5th Season Finale] . . . 9:00 to 10:00 P.M. on Lifetime.

--"Finding Sarah" [SERIES Premiere] . . . 9:00 to 10:00 P.M. on OWN. (--Duchess of York Sarah Ferguson tries to put her life in order with the help of Dr. Phil and financial expert Suze Orman.)

--"Bridezillas" [8th Season Premiere] . . . 9:00 to 10:00 P.M. on WE.

--"Keeping Up With the Kardashians" [6th Season Premiere] . . . 10:00 to 10:30 P.M. on E!

--"The Protector" [SERIES Premiere] . . . 10:00 to 11:00 P.M. on Lifetime. (--"Martin's" Tisha Campbell-Martin and Ally Walker from "The Profiler" star as homicide detectives investigating a fatal mugging that may have been a targeted murder.)

--"Why Not? With Shania Twain" [1st Season Finale] . . . 10:00 to 11:00 P.M. on OWN.

--"Ice Loves Coco" [SERIES Premiere] . . . 10:30 to 11:00 P.M. on E! (--Ice-T and his wife Nicole "Coco" Austin get their own reality series.)

Rihanna Grabbed a 16-Year-Old's Backside During a Meet and Greet . . . and Her Homophobic Aunt Wasn't Pleased:

The hysterical people at have started another "controversy." --Here's the story: A 16-year-old girl got the opportunity to take some pictures with RIHANNA at a recent "meet and greet" . . . and Rihanna got a little playful during the shoot. --Basically, she grabbed the girl's backside, and puckered her lips for the camera. Another shot features a third girl getting in on the action . . . hanging on Rihanna's other side. --It seems like some silly fun that probably THRILLED these fans. But one person wasn't happy about it: The 16-year-old's homophobic aunt. --MediaTakeOut says they got an "angry email" from the aunt . . . saying, quote, "I don't know what [Rihanna] was thinking. I don't want [my niece] even joking about lesbianism . . . not at her age." (???) (MediaTakeOut)

SpongeBob SquarePants Tried to Scam Beastie Boy Adam Horovitz:

SpongeBob SquarePants . . . or rather, a criminal dressed as SpongeBob SquarePants . . . tried to scam ADAM HOROVITZ of the BEASTIE BOYS on the subway in New York City. --Ad-Rock related the story on the band's blog. He explains, quote, "This [effin] guy bumps into me, and tries to run the broken watch scam on me. --"You know what I mean . . . he shows me some [crappy] watch on his wrist and he's like 'Yo, you broke my [effin] watch! You owe me $500.' Then the train kinda stopped quick, and he fell back against the doors and I was like, '[Eff] you Sponge Bob!' He kinda shrugged it off and walked to the next car." --But apparently "SpongeBob" wasn't done, because Ad-Rock later saw the police escorting "SpongeBob" through the station. --Ad-Rock says, quote, "I guess [he] tried to steal somebody's blackberry or something, and got busted by an undercover cop." --He even took a picture of SpongeBob's, quote, "perp walk." (--You can see the picture, here.) (

The Man Responsible for Meat Loaf Has Died:

Steve Popovich, the man responsible for MEAT LOAF . . . the singer, not the dinner entrée . . . has passed away. (--And left the rest of us to suffer through whatever 10-minute epics "Meat" has left in tank. Thanks, dude!) --Steve died of "unknown causes." He was 68. --He made history back in 1976, when he started his own music label . . . and discovered Meat Loaf and his "Bat Out of Hell" album. -Steve once said, quote, "Every major label passed on 'Bat Out of Hell' before [we] picked it up. It was the day and age of the wimpy-looking, Peter Frampton-types. Then here comes Meat Loaf, this huge guy with an amazing voice." --And now, "Bat Out of Hell" has gone Platinum . . . 14 times over.

Justin Bieber Gave Signed Guitars to . . . Posh Spice's Kids:

How would your kid like to have a guitar signed by JUSTIN BIEBER? Well, it's possible . . . as long as you're RICH, FAMOUS and maybe a little BRITISH. --Justin recently gave personalized, signed guitars to Brooklyn, Romeo and Cruz Beckham . . . the sons of DAVID BECKHAM and POSH SPICE. (--Here's a pic.) --Posh thanked Justin on Twitter saying, quote, "Thank u [Justin] for the boys' signed guitars!!! They are so happy!!!!!!!" (--Geez. Talk about winning the birth lottery.)

Flo Rida the Rapper Was Busted for DUI in Florida:

Apparently, Flo Rida doesn't get any breaks from the state that shares his name. --Flo Rida was busted for DUI in Miami Beach early yesterday morning. He was also popped for driving with a suspended license because he failing to pay a previous traffic fine. --It doesn't sound like the police could've missed him. He was spotted erratically swerving through South Beach in his sweet $1.7 million red and black 2008 Bugatti. --When the officers pulled him over, they found him sporting bloodshot, watery eyes. Flo's speech was also slurred, and his breath reeked of alcohol. --The cop asked him to do a field sobriety test . . . and Flo reportedly responded, quote, "I can't do this. I don't think I can walk a straight line. I had a few drinks. Let's do another test. I live on the other side of the bridge. I can make it home." --He was arrested . . . and ended up posting a blood-alcohol level of .185, which is more than twice the legal limit. (--Here's his mugshot . . . in which he still has those bloodshot, watery eyes.) --Flo Rida posted a $2,000 bond and was released. --By the way, the police report says that bystanders were "trying to get officers to let [Flo Rida] go. Some were even offering to drive him home." (--Stay classy, Miami.)
Showbiz Extras . . . Random Links to Additional Stories:

There's a rumor going around that GEORGE CLOONEY once dated ANTHONY WEINER'S wife BEFORE she was Mrs. Weiner. It's not true. (Full Story)

Remember when evil real estate tycoon LEONA HELMSLEY died in 2007 and left $12 million to her DOG? Well, we're just finding out that the dog DIED last December. She was a 12-year-old Maltese named Trouble. A court eventually reduced Trouble's inheritance to $2 million. Whatever's left of that money goes to Leona's charitable trust. (Full Story)

"So You Think You Can Dance" judge MARY MURPHY says ARNOLD SCHWARZENEGGER once hit on her makeup artist . . . within SECONDS of meeting her. (Full Story)

Check out a picture of SACHA BARON COHEN as the title character in his upcoming movie, "The Dictator" . . . which is loosely based on a novel written by . . . SADDAM HUSSEIN. (Full Story)

Despite a drop in prices, Blu-ray sales continue to decline. (Full Story)

If you missed it, JON CRYER talked about CHARLIE SHEEN on "Letterman" Wednesday night. He said he didn't see Charlie's meltdown coming . . . and never knew where it was going. And he said he still considers Charlie a "great friend." (Video)

DRAKE says his next album "Take Care" will drop on October 24th. (Full Story)


A New Survey Finds What the Average Man and Woman Rate as the Top Five Experiences of Their Lives:

What would you pick if you had to rate the top five experiences of your life? And no, the time you were front row at Skynyrd CAN'T count for at least four. --A new survey asked men and women to rank the top five moments of their lives. Here's how it broke down. --For men, the top moments went: Getting married . . . having a child . . . moving out of their parents' home . . . getting their first job . . . and then buying a home. --For women, the top moments went: Having a child . . . getting married . . . moving out of their parents' home . . . buying a home . . . and then getting their first job. --The first kiss ranked sixth on both lists. --The survey also found the average ages of different milestones. --People get their first pet at 11 . . . have their first kiss at 14 . . . get their first job at 17 . . . fall in love at 18 . . . not coincidentally lose their virginity at 18 . . . experience heartbreak at 20 . . . leave home at 20 . . . --Establish a career at 23 . . . get married at 25 . . . buy a home at 27 . . . have a child at 27 . . . divorce at 34 . . . have a midlife crisis at 41 . . . have their first grandchild at 54 . . . and retire at 59. (The Scotsman)

90% of Pet Owners Would Fight Harder For Pets Than Money In a Divorce:

My usual instinct is to rip on people for being obsessed with their pets. But for some reason, in this case, it feels like these pet owners have their priorities straight. --PetMD just released the results of a poll of more than 1,500 pet owners in the U.S. And their big finding is that in a divorce, 90% of people say they'd fight harder for their pets than for MONEY. Here are some more findings from the survey . . . --66% say they wouldn't vote for a presidential candidate who doesn't like pets. --60% would refuse to date someone who doesn't like pets. --Only 2% say it's better for kids to grow up without pets. --If they could only be friends with one living being, 73% would choose their pet over a human. --When it comes to . . . and I hate that this sounds like a pun . . . pet peeves, 50% of owners say they wish their pet could brush its own teeth. 40% wish the pet could clean up after itself after it moves its bowels. --And finally, 25% of owners have tasted their pet's food. (PR Newswire)

A New Study Reveals the Most Common Characteristics of a Cheater: is that horrible website designed for people who want to discreetly have affairs. Meaning pro-athletes and congressmen clearly aren't on it, because apparently none of them care about discretion. --Anyway, they ran a study of 300,000 of their members in Australia . . . yeah, 300,000 people want to cheat . . . to figure out the most common characteristics of a cheater.

--Here's what they found . . .

--They're more likely to be Christian than any other religion.

--They're more likely to be politically liberal.

--They've probably had more than one affair. And about one out of 10 people have had at least six affairs.

--There's a four out of five chance they use a PC and not a Mac.

--About 84% choose Coke over Pepsi.

--Less than 5% are vegetarians.

--And Gender doesn't matter . . . men and women are about equally likely to cheat.
(Daily Telegraph)

Thanks to Anthony Weiner, Tweeting is Way Down Among Congressmen:

Ever since ANTHONY WEINER accidentally tweeted a photo of his junk, his fellow Congressmen have gotten the message loud and clear: 'We don't fully understand this technology and we should stay the hell away from it.' --Notice they did NOT get the message to stop taking photos of their junk. We assume they will NEVER get that message. --According to a study by TweetCongress, ever since the Weiner scandal broke, tweeting has been WAY down among congressmen. Last week, tweeting was down amongst members of Congress by 28%. --On this past Monday, there were only 120 tweets from Democrats in Congress . . . down 30% from two Mondays before. There were 338 tweets from Republicans in Congress . . . down 18% from two Mondays before. (The Hill)

Las Vegas is About to Drop to the Third-Biggest Gambling Spot In the World:

Man, Vegas REALLY needs another genius marketing slogan, even BETTER than "What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas." Or another movie like "Swingers". Because it's losing serious ground. To the ASIANS. --In 2006, Macau passed Las Vegas to become the gambling capital of the world. If you're not familiar, Macau is a Chinese province that has exploded as a popular gambling destination. It pulls in almost four times as much money as Las Vegas. --And now, based on the forecasted earnings for this year, Vegas is going to drop to number three . . . behind SINGAPORE. --Singapore is set to pull in $6.4 BILLION this year, while Las Vegas will bring in $6.2 BILLION. Macau looks like it will bring in more than $24 BILLION. (Time)

Greenpeace Says the Latest Person Destroying the Rainforest Is . . . Barbie?

--There have been some rumblings from Greenpeace this week around the Mattel headquarters in El Segundo, California and now we know why. --Greenpeace says they've found evidence that the latest person responsible for destroying the rainforests is . . . BARBIE.--More specifically, Mattel, the company that makes Barbie. Greenpeace says that they've been making their packaging for the dolls out of Indonesian rainforests. -A company called Asia Pulp and Paper supplies Mattel, along with other toy companies including Disney. Greenpeace believes they've linked Asia Pulp and Paper to harvesting in the rainforest. --In a statement, Greenpeace said, quote, "Barbie is trashing rainforests and pushing critically-endangered wildlife, like tigers, toward extinction." --Mattel said they've been corresponding with Greenpeace since these accusations came out. --Asia Pulp and Paper says that Greenpeace is wrong . . . they're meeting all legal requirements and that Barbie's packaging is made from 96% recycled material. (Yahoo News)


A Man In Mexico Tries to Avoid an Arrest By . . . Having a Sex Change:

Now THIS is going to ridiculous extremes to try to stay out of prison. --In Mexico, police captured a wanted criminal who was trying to avoid an arrest by . . . GETTING A SEX CHANGE. --33-year-old Aaron Vera Morales was on the run after being charged with defrauding a government health agency. --And his strategy wasn't just to dress up as a woman to hide . . . it was to BECOME a woman. --He had all the surgeries and even had new documents with his female identity. --Federal officials didn't say how they tracked him down or how much prison time he's looking at. (--It's Mexico, I'm not sure how they do prison time there. I think it's based on your funds available for bribes.) (Fox News)

Police in Ohio Have Caught a Man Who Said He Was Scratched By a Wolf . . . And Then Started Committing Crimes When the Moon Was Out:

The good people of Lorain County, Ohio can sleep well tonight . . . because there's one less WEREWOLF on their streets. --20-year-old Thomas Stroup of Sheffield Township, Ohio was that werewolf. He was out late one night, starting fights with people, and growling at dogs. --When the police got there, Thomas growled at them and talked in a thick Russian accent. --Then he explained what was going on. Last year he went on a trip to Germany, and while he was there he was scratched by a wolf. --Since then, he says he, quote, "goes on the attack when the moon's out." --The police weren't fully buying the werewolf defense . . . they chose to focus on the fact that Thomas seemed hammered drunk on vodka. --He was arrested and charged with underage consumption. --On the ride to jail, he admitted to the cops that he was also arrested on his trip to Germany after he passed out . . . because he drank too much vodka. (Lorain Morning Journal)

A Man Accidentally Texts His Drug Buying Plan to the Cops . . . His Mom Tries to Take the Rap For Him . . . And Now They're Both Locked Up:

25-year-old Travis Edwin Huffman of Porter, Texas recently wanted to sell some illegal Vicodin. He tried to make a deal with one of his buyers, and texted him the meet-up plan. --There was only one TINY issue. Travis texted the wrong number . . . and somehow, that wrong number was the LOCAL POLICE. --So instead of his customer meeting him in the Walmart parking lot, the cops showed up. --After Travis was arrested, his mother, 43-year-old Kimberly "Butterbean" Meadows, stepped in. Yes, her nickname is really Butterbean. --She told the cops that her son was completely innocent . . . the pills were HERS and she asked him to sell them so they could share the profits. --She was promptly arrested. But her confession didn't get her son off the hook . . . just because he sold the pills to split the profits with her doesn't make him any LESS guilty. --So now they're BOTH in jail, charged with felony delivery of a controlled substance. (Houston Press)


A 15-Year-Old Girl With Terminal Cancer Posted Her Bucket List Online . . . And Now That It's Going Viral People Are Trying to Make It Come True:

Man, if this turns out to be a scam I'm going to be so disillusioned. --A 15-year-old girl named Alice in Ulverston, England, has spent the past four years battling cancer. But tragically, she's losing the fight. --Alice started a blog earlier this week featuring her bucket list . . . stuff like having a private movie party with her friends, entering her dog in a dog show, and meeting her favorite band, the British group TAKE THAT. --And now . . . the list has gone viral. People from all over the world are reaching out to Alice to help her fulfill the items on her list. You can see the blog and the list at

Is This Four-Year-Old Girl the Next Great Artist?

Four-year-old Aelita Andre lives in Australia. She makes paintings. And . . . she's being called an up-and-coming MASTER. --She does abstract art . . . like most four-year-olds . . . only her pieces aren't considered "little kid randomly splashing paint," they're considered masterpieces. They're selling right now for as much as $30,000 each. But we're not so convinced. (Daily Mail) (--Check out her work here. And either way, you might want to put a piece of canvas down in front of your toddler to see if you've also got a prodigy on your hands.)

Random News Extras . . . Random Links to Additional Stories:

Would you like a watch that's also a Magic 8 Ball? Of course you would. There's a Nixon watch called 'The Genie' with a Magic 8 Ball mode that responds to questions with one of 15 random answers. It's going for $120. (Full Story)

According to a new study, people who communicate better and understand people's emotions are more likely to have satisfying sex. Happy Friday! (Full Story)

A guy on his way to court for reckless driving was searching for his attorney's phone number while driving . . . and got into a head-on collision (Full Story)


#1.) A Guy Chopped a Tree Down to Steal the Bike Chained to It . . . Then Left the Bike on the Sidewalk and Left:

Some moron in New York City wanted to steal a bike that was chained to a tree. So he did the only logical thing: He chopped the tree down with an axe. It happened at two in the morning on Wednesday, and a security camera caught it on tape. --But the worst part is, he didn't even end up taking the bike. He just left it on the sidewalk and left. (--Search YouTube for "Bike Thief Chopping a Tree Down." He starts chopping at :16, and the tree falls at 1:38.)

#2.) A News Anchor Meant to Say Teenagers Are Having More "Luck" Finding Summer Jobs . . . But Said the F-Word by Mistake:

On Wednesday, a local news anchor in Roanoke, Virginia named Holly Pietrzak was reporting on how teenagers are having better "luck" finding summer jobs. But instead of "luck," she dropped an F-bomb. (--Search for "Holly Pietrzak Drops F-Bomb.") (--WARNING: This video includes the F-word.)

#3.) Is This Australian Beer Ad the "Most Epic Beer Commercial Ever"?

There have been a lot of great beer ads over the years. But the Hahn Brewery in Australia released a new one on YouTube that's been dubbed the "Most Epic Beer Commercial Ever". --According to the ad, Hahn beer is brewed by having bodybuilders crush the hops with hammers. Then they show the hops footage from old kung-fu movies, and the beer gets poured over a mountain of trophies before it's ready to drink. --There's also a DeLorean with monster truck wheels that powers the conveyor belt. And the ad features the theme song from the TV show "Knight Rider".

#4.) An Old Couple Tried to Take a Photo With Their Computer Camera . . . And Didn't Realize They Were Recording Video:

Someone posted a video on YouTube of an old couple named Rita and Frank trying to use their computer to take a picture for Frank's 84th birthday. But they don't realize they're shooting video, and get confused because they don't hear a clicking sound. --So they pose for way too long while Frank holds his birthday cake. And Rita keeps saying, "did you hear a click?" --If clueless but adorable old people are your thing . . . they also posted a video for RITA'S birthday, where Frank sings to her and holds a cake that looks almost identical to the first one. (--Search for "Frank and Rita Did You Hear a Click" and "Rita and Frank 80th BDay Edit.")
Four Tips for Hooking Up With a Bridesmaid:

--According to, "wedding season" is June through October. So here's a list from for single men who want to take full advantage of it. --These are four tips for hooking up with a bridesmaid . . . or basically ANY single woman at a wedding.

#1.) Bring a Nice Digital Camera. Borrow one from a friend if you need to. The more expensive it looks, the better. Just don't go overboard and bring a camera with an enormous zoom lens. You'll look like an idiot. --Women spend a lot of time getting ready for weddings, so they love having their photo taken. And if some guy with a good camera is taking pictures, they'll eventually want to be in one. --Then just tell her how good she looks in it, and take it from there.

#2.) Attend the Actual Ceremony. Single guys don't have girlfriends dragging them along. So sometimes they just skip the ceremony, and show up at the reception. Do not do this. --Going to the ceremony is important because it gives you a head start on finding a girl you're interested in. Plus, if the girl you end up talking to eventually finds out that you didn't go to the wedding, she'll think you're a scumbag.

#3.) Dance With an Older Woman. Owen Wilson dances with one of the little flower girls in "Wedding Crashers" . . . this is the same idea. And you should do it for two reasons. --One, it makes you look sweet. And two, it also lets every woman in the room know that you're probably available . . . because otherwise you'd be dancing with your date.

#4.) Know When She's About to Head to the Bar. When you hear the DJ say something like, "This one's for all the couples," or "We're gonna slow things down for a minute," that's your cue. --That's when every single girl on the dance floor will either head for the bar or the bathroom. Since you can't talk to them in the bathroom, the bar is a slightly better choice. (


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