Wednesday, August 24, 2011


Will Smith and Jada Pinkett Are Not Splitting Up:

By now you've heard the rumor that WILL SMITH and JADA PINKETT are splitting up. Well, they say there's no truth to it at all. --Here's their statement . . . quote, "Although we are reluctant to respond to these types of press reports, the rumors circulating about our relationship are completely false. We are still together, and our marriage is intact." --Some websites were reporting that Jada hooked up with MARC ANTHONY . . . who's on her show "HawthoRNe". But Jada's rep said, quote, "Everything about the Marc Anthony story is completely false." --Will's eldest son Trey also Tweeted that the rumor was bogus. --Trey is Will's son from his first marriage. He's 18. Will and Jada have two kids together . . . 13-year-old Jaden and 10-year-old Willow. --Assuming they're telling the truth, Will and Jada will celebrate their 14th anniversary on December 31st.

Amy Winehouse Did NOT Have Illegal Drugs in Her System When She Died:

This is a little shocking: AMY WINEHOUSE had NO ILLEGAL DRUGS in her system when she died last month. --A spokesman for her family said yesterday, quote, "Toxicology results returned to the Winehouse family by authorities have confirmed that there were no illegal substances in Amy's system at the time of her death." --The spokesman admitted that there WAS alcohol in her system . . . but said it's too early to tell if it played a part in her death. He added, quote, "[The family awaits] the outcome of the inquest [into Amy's death] in October." --After Amy's death on July 23rd, her father MITCH said she'd been off drugs for THREE YEARS, and was working hard to overcome her alcohol addiction. --One thing the family spokesman did NOT say, however, is whether there were any LEGAL drugs in Amy's system.

Gavin DeGraw Explains What Happened the Night He Got Beat Up . . . And Says He's "Not Living in Fear":

Despite being attacked and seriously injured by several men in Manhattan a few weeks ago, GAVIN DEGRAW is trying to get back to business as usual. --He says, quote, "I'm not living in fear. It was a terrible night for me, but fortunately I got through it. I still look like my mother, and onward and upward." --Gavin gave "People" magazine an account of what happened that night . . . or at least what he can remember of it. --He says, quote, "I had a night off, and I met up with some friends at the bar I own with my brother. We had a few drinks. I put my friends in a cab and I walked home because I live pretty close. --"I remember maybe three guys said something to me and I didn't appreciate it, and I guess I let them know I didn't appreciate it. They weren't exactly on the debate team, so I ended up with a tube down my throat. --"I just literally remember an exchange of words that lasted a second and then being very bloody." --As for his condition when he left the bar, he says, quote, "I can't say I was drunk. I know I had a few drinks with friends." --Gavin is scheduled to resume touring with MAROON 5 and TRAIN tonight . . . which could be a challenge due to the injuries he suffered, like his broken nose. --He says, quote, "My breathing isn't exactly the same. I'm feeling out my breathing through my nose trying to see if the swelling's going down. The sensation is mildly different, so that makes me fearful about singing." --Gavin is also still feeling the effects of his concussion . . . quote, "My brain definitely got sloshed around in my skull during that walk home [afterwards]. I still get dizzy . . . particularly if I stand up from sitting down." --But at least he LOOKS presentable. He says, quote, "When I first saw my face, it looked like evil me. I had some fractures in my cheekbone and eye and nose. Everything was completely swollen." --"[Now] I have a little mark on my nose from stitches. If you saw me right now, you'd think I'd cut myself shaving on my nose. It literally looks like there's almost nothing visibly wrong anymore." --Police are still investigating the beating, and don't have any suspects. But Gavin isn't too worried about it. He says, quote, "There are many and much worse crimes happening than me getting beat up. --"I don't think that it's necessarily even fair that I got the attention I did."

Someone Sent a Suspicious White Powder to Craig Ferguson:

Somebody sent a suspicious white powder to "Late Late Show" host CRAIG FERGUSON at CBS Television City yesterday. It turned out to be harmless, but police are investigating. They think it was sent from somewhere in Europe. --Ferguson Tweeted, quote, "Ack! Someone mailed my show white powder & claimed it was anthrax. I'm not a big fan of that sort of thing. #thanks FBI & LAPD & LAFD & CBS security." --This happened just days after a supposed Muslim Extremist called for DAVID LETTERMAN'S death on a website frequented by members of al-Qaeda. (--"Letterman" is Ferguson's lead-in show.)

Check Out a Photo Gallery of Celebrity Defects:

Megan Fox has stubby thumbs . . . Ashton Kutcher has webbed toes . . . Kate Bosworth has two different-colored eyes . . . and Mark Wahlberg and Tilda Swinton each have three nipples. --Learn about these and more CELEBRITY DEFECTS in this amusing photo gallery.

Jane Lynch Was Once Addicted to Cough Syrup:

JANE LYNCH . . . "Glee's" TRUE sex symbol if you ask me . . . admits that she got hooked on COUGH SYRUP after she quit drinking in 1991. (--She was 31 at the time.) --In her upcoming autobiography "Happy Accidents", she says, quote, "I found myself eating about a gallon of chocolate ice cream daily to replace the copious amounts of sugar my body was used to from my daily beer intake. --"I did, however, continue my habit of taking NyQuil before bed. Though no longer drinking Miller Lite, I was in need of something to soothe me. --"The fact that NyQuil had alcohol in it was not something I acknowledged at all. I still considered myself on the wagon. I'd close the drapes, take a swig of NyQuil, toast with a simple 'bye bye' and go into a deep sleep." --Jane eventually got the NyQuil Monkey off her back with help from Alcoholics Anonymous.

Celebrities React to Yesterday's Earthquake:

Yesterday's 5.9 earthquake was felt up and down the East Coast . . . where several celebrities were able to experience AND TWEET about it. (--Lucky us!) Here's what they had to say . . .

--Elizabeth Banks: "um, earthquake in north carolina? it's nice to feel at home but please, don't go overboard."

--Carson Daly: "Things are rollin in NYC now huh? Welcome to cali."

--"Daily Show" correspondent John Hodgman: "This guy in the cafe and I agree that we liked the earthquake when it first started. But now it's like, the wrong people are into it."

--Patton Oswalt: "Not to panic anyone in NYC, but a screaming John Cusack just drove by in a limo that was missing a door."

--Marlee Matlin: "They felt the #Earthquake as far as Des Plaines, IL?! That's practically my home town!"

--Adam Levine from Maroon 5: "Happy to have been here for the most freakish earthquake Washington DC has ever seen," he later added. "Looks like we brought our California earthquake mojo to DC. Oops."

--Snooki, being a best-selling author and all, was prolific enough to produce TWO Tweets . . . "Omg earthquakeeeee" and "Waahhhhhhh".

--Ice-T: "As long as everyone's ok…… Keep it moovin. The EARTH is gonna do whatever the [eff] it wants to do."

Elijah Wood Says He Doesn't Smoke Pot . . . But He Thinks It Should Be Legalized:

ELIJAH WOOD says he does NOT smoke pot . . . but he totally supports the cause of legalization. He even talked to "High Times" magazine about it. --He said, quote, "It's gotten to the point where it just seems a natural part of people's lives. It's certainly not taboo; I know a number of people who have medical cards. People feel very free talking about it. --"It doesn't seem to be hidden or shoved under the carpet. It's part of people's lives in a very natural way." --"I think the whole notion that marijuana is illegal is past the point of ridiculousness." --As for why he (supposedly) doesn't partake, Elijah says, quote, "It never really sat well with me . . . I've always wished I could achieve that comfort and tolerance, but I have no tolerance for it whatsoever."

Anderson Cooper Says He's "Always Giggled Like a 13-Year-Old Girl":

Last week, ANDERSON COOPER broke out in a "giggle fit" on his CNN show while talking about GERARD DEPARDIEU peeing on the floor of an airplane. (--Here's that video again. Anderson begins to unravel at the 2:25 mark.) --If you've been wondering what the heck is up with that laugh, Anderson has an explanation for you. --He tells "Entertainment Weekly", quote, "I've always giggled like a 13-year-old girl at a Justin Bieber meet-and-greet. There's nothing I can do about it, but I've never not been able to stop. --"I'm a little stunned by how many people have seen that video. I went to bed telling myself, 'I doubt anyone will notice the giggle fit.' I woke up and in the elevator the first thing my building super said to me was, 'What's wrong with your laugh?' --"It could be worse: I could have a viral video in which I throw up on a guest or drunkenly eat a hamburger on a bathroom floor. Not that I've ever done either of those things. Not yet at least." (--There are several versions of the clip on YouTube, which total over a million views. But the real loser in this is Gerard Depardieu, who must be THRILLED that Anderson's "giggle fit" brought even more attention to his peeing incident.)
Simon Cowell Gets Hooked Up to an IV to Get His Weekly Vitamins:

How do you take your vitamins? If you're a normal person, you may pop a Centrum or a few supplements . . . but if you're SIMON COWELL, you have yourself hooked up to an IV once a week for a direct injection. (???) --This isn't a silly tabloid rumor. Simon explains the ridiculous process in a new interview with "GQ". He says he mainlines B12, magnesium, vitamin C and, quote, "something for your liver." --But he's a COWARD when it comes to needles . . . so he has his arm FROZEN with some kind of spray beforehand, and has an assistant help him with the IV. He's connected to it for about a half-hour. --If his treatment time happens to fall during a business meeting, he does it anyway . . . quote, "Even when I'm having a viewing session with producers . . . she just sticks a needle in me and we carry on doing whatever we're doing." --But he says it's worth it . . . quote, "When you have it done, it's an incredibly warm feeling. You feel all the vitamins going through you. It's indescribable but very calming, and then it gives you energy for a good few days afterwards. --"Everyone I've recommended it to, they've absolutely loved it. It sounds odd, but when you have it, it is fantastic. One girl came down and actually had two orgasms during the treatment." (--Uh, well I think that takes a special kind of girl.)

Uncle Frank from "Jimmy Kimmel Live!" Has Died:

UNCLE FRANK from "Jimmy Kimmel Live!" died yesterday morning. He was 77. Frank was Jimmy's real-life uncle, and Jimmy invited him to be a part of the show when it started back in 2003. He was Jimmy's "security guard" sidekick. --Frank was a veteran of the Korean War . . . and also served 20 years as a police officer in New York, and as a security guard at Caesar's Palace in Las Vegas. --Jimmy Tweeted, quote, "Thank you for your kind words about a very kind man, my Uncle Frank, who passed away this morning." (--Here's a video of Uncle Frank in a bit where he's the show's "chief meteorologist. And here's the "Hollywood Reporter's" list of Uncle Frank's "Five Funniest Moments".)

Lady Gaga Is Doing "The Simpsons" . . . and She Says It's "One of the Coolest Things She's Ever Done":

LADY GAGA is voicing a character on an upcoming episode of "The Simpsons". She's playing herself . . . and at some point, she kisses MARGE. Lady Gaga says, quote, "I play a little bit of a slut. The apple doesn't fall far from my artistic tree." --But Lady Gaga loved doing it. She explains, quote, "Their characters are so awesomely convincing and sincere and wild and funny, I had to remind myself constantly of the sincerity of the humor. --"I would say this is one of the coolest things I've ever done." (--Here's a picture of Lady Gaga recording her part.)

Wednesday TV Reminders: (--Check your local listings.)

--"Buried Treasure" [SERIES Premiere] . . . 8:00 to 9:00 P.M. on Fox. (--"Antiques Roadshow" identical-twin brothers Leigh and Leslie Keno appraise the worth of people's knickknacks as they stop by their homes on a cross-country road trip.)

--"Big Brother 13" [Power of Veto competition] . . . 8:00 to 9:00 P.M. on CBS.

--"America's Got Talent" [Results Show] . . . 9:00 to 10:00 P.M. on NBC.

--"Ghost Hunters" [7th Season Premiere] . . . 9:00 to 10:00 P.M. on Syfy.

--"Man v. Food Nation" [1st Season Finale] . . . 9:00 to 9:30 P.M. on Travel Channel.

--"Hot in Cleveland" . . . 10:00 to 10:30 P.M. on TV Land. (--Cedric the Entertainer guests as a reverend when Betty White plans her wedding.)

--"The Real World/Road Rules Challenge" [21st Season Finale] . . . 10:00 to 11:00 P.M. on MTV.

--"Confessions: Animal Hoarding" [3rd Season Premiere] . . . 10:00 to 11:00 P.M. on Animal Planet.

--"Top Chef Just Desserts" [2nd Season Premiere] . . . 10:00 to 11:00 P.M. on Bravo. (--Gail Simmons hosts as 14 pastry making contestants compete.)

The Mystery of Jani Lane's Makeshift Dog Tag:

Former WARRANT singer JANI LANE had a mysterious note on him when he was found dead earlier this month at a Comfort Inn. (--Which is considered a "first class hotel" among some in the metal community, specifically SKID ROW.) --The note said, quote, "I am Jani Lane" . . . and included the phone number for "a person close" to him. It was in his pocket. Jani didn't write the note . . . a friend of his did . . . and that person had made similar notes in the past. --What's the deal? --Well, "law enforcement sources" tell TMZ that Jani didn't have a form of official identification on him on the day he died . . . and he hadn't had an ID for a while. So, maybe this "friend" put the note on Jani as a makeshift dog tag. --This is what Jani's family thinks . . . and they are reportedly FURIOUS about it, because it suggests that the person who wrote it knew that Jani had issues . . . --And was aware that Jani was in danger of either abusing drugs, harming himself, or that he was not in a mental state to take care of himself. (--After all, Jani was 47 years old . . . and not a kindergartner with a note safety-pinned to his shirt.) --There's no criminal investigation into Jani's death. For now, officials believe it was either accidental or due to natural causes . . . but the toxicology test results haven't come back yet.

Today in Gangsta Rap: Snoop Dogg Wants to Break a Twitter Record:

If TUPAC and BIGGIE were alive today, do you think they'd be on Twitter . . . challenging each other to digital beefs through horribly misspelled Internet lingo, and in 140-character bursts? --Well, even if they were . . . that would still be FAR more gangsta than SNOOP DOGG'S latest endeavor. Check this out: --Snoop has amassed over four million Twitter followers, and he's decided to take advantage of that by setting a Twitter record for most re-tweets in one day. --He explains, quote, "Hitting four million Twizzles is a big moment for me . . . and I want to show the world how powerful and influential social media and my fans are, [so] I'm attempting to set the world record for the most 're-tweets.'" --It's unclear what the previous mark was, but REVEREND RUN supposedly set it UNOFFICIALLY last year. We're assuming Snoop is going to make this one official, because he's name-dropping the "Guinness Book of World Records". --His effort started yesterday, with this marijuana-related Tweet: Quote, "Moment of silence 4 tha world's biggest chronic break. Need my twizzles 2 pass this cyber blunt #PuffPuffPassTuesdays RT" (--From the tag, it sounds like the world record chase will be a weekly thing . . . and that it'll regularly mention weed. As of late last night, there's no word how well Snoop did on his first day. Here's his Twitter feed.)

Here's The Real Reason *Behind* Taylor Swift's Accidental Concert Upskirt:

We finally know the answer to one of the most important questions of the new millennium. --That being . . . how did TAYLOR SWIFT . . . who stringently controls every facet of her stage show . . . NOT know there was a wind machine on full blast ready to blow up her skirt and reveal her industrial strength granny panties? --The answer is that the fan was NOT supposed to be on. That's what Taylor told RYAN SEACREST. She said, quote, "We have wind machines for a few songs in the show and they weren't supposed to be on during that song. --"I walked over thinking it wasn't on and it just kind of blew it up a little bit. I was just sort of like, 'Well, that's new' and just continued on with the show." (--We know Taylor is super nice to her employees . . . so I'd love to hear how she dealt with the person who screwed that up. Especially considering how hard she works to protect her "good girl" image.) --While we're on the subject . . . Taylor Swift recently dropped $2.5 million on a historic home in Nashville, Tennessee. It's a 4-bedroom, 4.5 bathroom 5,601 square foot house that was formerly owned by the U.S. ambassador to Denmark. (--You can see photos of it, here. The house even has its own website. Check that out, here.)


Showbiz Extras . . . Random Links to Additional Stories:

Former "CSI" star WILLIAM PETERSEN and his wife Gina Cirone are the parents of twins. The baby boy and girl were born July 5th to a surrogate mother, but were premature. Petersen says they're "doing great and improving every day." (Full Story)

ANNE HATHAWAY says she was more nervous about doing a British accent than she was about getting naked in her new movie "One Day". (Full Story)

The "National Enquirer" claims that KATE MIDDLETON suffered a miscarriage. (Full Story)

About a month ago, OKSANA GRIGORIEVA'S 13-year-old son Sasha accidentally put his hand through a plate glass window. Oksana's hysterical 911 call hit the web yesterday. (Full Story)

MATT DAMON has heard that MICHAEL MOORE wants him to run for president. But he says, quote, "I think there are probably better choices out there." (Full Story)

Check out the trailer for "The Way" . . . starring MARTIN SHEEN and directed by, and co-starring, his son EMILIO ESTEVEZ. (Emilio Video) And here's a 15-second promo for Comedy Central's upcoming CHARLIE SHEEN roast. (Charlie Video)

A "source" tells "People" that MARIAH CAREY will definitely be a part of "X Factor". She won't be a judge. Instead, she's going to "tape something with SIMON COWELL." There's talk that she's going to be some sort of "mentor," but it's unclear what that entails. (Full Story) (--Obviously, her role will be detailed once it becomes official. But for now, it just sounds like another example of how Simon is trying to stack his team.)

"New York" magazine says the Oxygen network has no plans to do another season of PARIS HILTON'S reality show "The World According to Paris". (Full Story)

"Saturday Night Live" recently announced that JIMMY FALLON would host an episode in December. The strange thing is, in an "SNL" skit that aired in December of 1998, Jimmy told ALEC BALDWIN, quote, "Apparently I become a huge star in the future and I host the show in the year 2011." (Full Story)

Ross Barbour . . . the last original member of the '50s group the Four Freshmen . . . has died. He was 82. (Full Story)

DWAYNE JOHNSON . . . a.k.a. THE ROCK . . . is developing a wrestling drama for NBC. All we know is that the show will be set in the '80s. (Full Story)

"Entourage" star JEREMY PIVEN is developing a reality show about GLASSBLOWING. (???) It doesn't have a network yet. (Full Story) (--Stop it! Not EVERY occupation is exciting enough to have its own reality show.)

ISAIAH MUSTAFA . . . that sexy Old Spice guy your wife desires . . . will have a recurring role on the new "Charlie's Angels" show. (Full Story)


A 12-Year-Old Boy Delivers His Own Brother:

(--We always hear about the nonsense, strife, struggles, horrors, chaos, calamity and stupidity in the world . . . now . . . here's "The Good News.") This is either going to make this kid want to become a doctor . . . or scare him away from procreation and childbirth for the rest of his life. Could REALLY go either way. --Early Saturday morning, in Campbell River, British Columbia, 12-year-old Gaelan Edwards was watching TV when he heard his 30-year-old mother, Danielle Edwards, calling for help. --Danielle was pregnant . . . and had just gone into LABOR. --She says, quote, "I didn't go through any of the preliminary labor pains, none of it." She just suddenly found herself in labor with the baby's head crowning and no time to get to the hospital. --So it was up to Gaelan to deliver HIS OWN BROTHER. --Danielle says, quote, "I said, 'Gaelan, when I push next, I need you to grab the baby by the shoulders and pull him out.' And he, just like by instinct, grabbed the baby by the shoulders . . . and eased him out." --Then Gaelan went to the kitchen . . . grabbed some scissors and one of those clips you use to seal potato chip bags . . . clamped the umbilical cord . . . cut it . . . and helped his mom push out the placenta. --At that point they finally arranged to go to the hospital. Danielle was fine . . . her new sun, Caynan, was fine . . . and Gaelan wasn't too shaken up either. He starts seventh grade next month. (Victoria Times Colonist)

An NFL Legend is Reunited With His Championship Ring . . . That was Stolen Over 30 Years Ago:

ART DONOVAN is an NFL hall-of-famer who played defensive tackle for the Baltimore Colts when they won back-to-back NFL World Championships . . . that was the era before the Super Bowl . . . in 1958 and 1959. --That 1958 game is sometimes called the "Greatest Game Ever Played" . . . the Colts beat the New York Giants in sudden death, 23-to-17, at Yankee Stadium. --Back in 1977, Donovan was on a trip to Japan and his championship ring from that 1958 game was STOLEN. In the past 34 years, Donovan basically conceded that the ring was gone for good. --Then, earlier this month, police in Baltimore got a tip that Donovan's ring had surfaced. It was clearly Donovan's because it had his name and his jersey number, 70, engraved on it. And it was being sold on Craigslist for $20,000. --The police posed as buyers. As soon as they had the ring in hand, they told the seller it was stolen. --He told them he'd purchased it from a memorabilia dealer several years ago and had no idea it was stolen . . . and agreed to give it back to Donovan. No criminal charges will be filed. --So now, at age 86, Art Donovan was reunited with his first championship ring. (Fox Sports)

A 92-Year-Old Woman Takes a Bullet for Her Hairdresser . . . Then Worries the Hospital Will Mess Up Her New Hairdo During Surgery:

If there are two things we know for sure about elderly women, it's that they can't stand disrespectful young punks . . . and that they take their trips to the hair salon VERY seriously. --On Friday in Newport, Wales, 92-year-old Connie Evans proved both of those things. And became a HERO at the same time. --Connie was at a salon called Carol Ann's, and had just gotten her hair done by her hairdresser, 37-year-old Rachel Williams. --Suddenly, Rachel's estranged husband, 45-year-old Darren Williams, busted through the door . . . holding a DOUBLE-BARREL SHOTGUN. And Connie wasn't going to let him use it on her hairdresser. --She kicked a table toward Darren . . . then JUMPED in between him and Rachel. But Darren fired both barrels anyway. He hit Rachel in the leg . . . and the other bullet hit Connie in the NECK. --Thankfully, neither shot was fatal . . . the bullet just grazed Connie. And as she was being taken to the hospital, her main concern was . . . that the doctors didn't SHAVE HER HEAD and mess up her gorgeous new hairdo. --Both she and Rachel were treated and released . . . no hairs were harmed. --As for Darren, police tracked him down in the woods a few hours later . . . he had shot and killed himself. (Daily Mail)

This Year's College Freshmen Don't Remember Jordan on the Bulls . . . Never Saw "Cheers" . . . and Have Never Lived Without MP3s:

Every year this list comes out and we all want to KILL OURSELVES because we're SO DAMN OLD. --Beloit College in Wisconsin just released its annual "Mindset List" for this year's crop of incoming college freshmen . . . the class of 2015. Most of them were born in 1993, so they shouldn't remember much before 1998 or 1999. --Here are 13 highlights from this year's list of things today's college freshmen do or don't know . . . which will once again make you wonder if it's time to join the AARP.

#1.) They have no memory of the GEORGE BUSH presidency . . . meaning George H. W. Bush. In fact, they only have memories of the tail end of the CLINTON presidency.

#2.) Ferris Bueller is old enough to be their father.

#3.) "Amazon" makes them think of the website first, the river second. (--And, I'm guessing, the gorgeously gigantic women third.)

#4.) JOHN WAYNE BOBBITT has always been reattached, and O.J. SIMPSON has always been searching for the real killers.

#5.) MP3s have always been available to download, whether legally or illegally.

#6.) They've never seen the gigantic Sears catalog.

#7.) They have no memory of MICHAEL JORDAN on the Bulls.

#8.) They never saw "Cheers" on NBC.

#9.) Major League Baseball has never had fewer than six divisions, and has always had the wild card.

#10.) Their parents have told them stories about how they fought to get them a Tickle Me Elmo . . . when they were three.

#11.) Women have never been too old to have children.

#12.) They never saw the Soviet Union . . . to them, Russia has never had an official communist party.

#13.) The phrase "Don't touch that dial" on TV doesn't mean anything to them . . . their TVs never had dials.

(Beloit College)

(--You can see the full list here. And you can reach the author of the list, Ron Nief of Beloit College, at 608-770-2625.)

Forget Two Months' Salary . . . in This Economy, Men are Barely Willing to Drop Three Weeks' Salary on an Engagement Ring:

Good news for all the cheap bastards out there who somehow found a woman willing to spend the rest of their life with them. You don't have to max out your credit cards to get her an engagement ring after all. --According to a new survey, in today's economy, engagement ring spending is way down across the board. And hopefully, your future fiancée's expectations are going down with it. --The old rule of thumb used to be two or three months' salary for a ring. Now, TWO-THIRDS of men are spending about THREE WEEKS' SALARY. --In other words . . . in the past, someone making $50,000-a-year would've been looking at a ring in the $8,000 to $12,000 range. Now he's looking in the $3,000 range. --Fortunately, more than half of the women surveyed didn't realize their future husband had cheaped out on them and overestimated the price of their ring. --The majority also said they hoped that their boyfriend would spend at least one month's salary. (Daily Mail)
One in Four Single Women Would Rather Have a Neighbor With Pets Than Live Next Door to a Single Guy:

If you're a single guy hoping a couple hot single chicks move in to the apartment next door, we have some bad news for you. --A survey from found that most single women don't want to have a single guy as a neighbor. --While almost half of all single men said they'd like to live next to an available woman, only 17% of the women said they'd want a single guy next door. --One in four women would rather live next door to neighbors with pets than a guy looking for a date. --In fact, most women aren't thinking about single guys at all when they're looking for a place to live. 57% of them say they make a housing decision based on affordability. --And even if you do luck out and live next to an available lady, she probably isn't shacking up with a hot roommate. Only 9% of single women share their place with another female. also looked at which cities had the best combination of professional opportunities, social life, and hot guys. And the best city for single women is . . . Phoenix, Arizona. --The rest of the top five are Seattle, Austin, Denver, and Washington, D.C. (

Did the Earthquake Yesterday Make Obama Miss a Putt?

As you may've heard everyone screaming about on cable news, PRESIDENT OBAMA is on vacation in Martha's Vineyard. And as you may've heard everyone screaming about on Twitter yesterday, there was an earthquake on the East Coast. --Those two scream-worthy events collided yesterday, because Obama was GOLFING when the earthquake hit . . . and it may've cost him a PUTT. --According to a blogger who was part of the journalist pool near the golf course, when the quake was hitting, quote, "He missed the hole on his first putt but got it close. He then tried to tap it in, but missed again." --Of course, the quake wasn't very strong up in Massachusetts where he was golfing, so those missed putts COULD just be because he's not a great golfer. (The Telegraph)

A New Side Effect of Global Warming Could Be . . . It'll Make Aliens Attack Us?

This is obviously absurd and ridiculous . . . UNLESS IT'S NOT. --Some very smart dudes from NASA and Penn State University put together a study on the different scenarios that could come from humans and aliens making contact. They range from friendly and enlightening, to the death of us all. --But one scenario stood out the most. They say because of global warming, aliens could see that we're changing the chemical composition of the atmosphere . . . and consider us a THREAT to the Milky Way galaxy. --Aliens could feel they HAVE to intervene to save the galaxy . . . and by "intervene," we mean "destroy our civilization." That's right: The way we're treating the planet might lead to an alien invasion sooner rather than later. You're welcome. (Sync)

More Than One-Third of People Use Their iPad in the Bathroom:

Might want to run a quick sanitizing wipe over your friend's iPad next time you're at their house and want to mess around with it. --A new survey by Staples found that 35% of iPad owners use it when they're on the toilet. They didn't find out how many people sanitize it afterward . . . but I'm guessing that number is somewhere close to ZERO. --In less-interesting findings, the survey revealed that 78% of people take their iPad to bed, 60% take it on vacation, and 30% take it into restaurants. (Mashable)

A Mets-Phillies Game was Delayed Because a Mets Player was On the Toilet When He was Supposed to be Batting:

Angel Pagan is an outfielder on the New York Mets. And since he's not a particularly well-known player . . . this is now officially what he's going to be known for. --On Monday night, the Mets were playing the Phillies in Philadelphia. And as the Mets wrapped up the bottom of the fourth inning, Pagan felt something going on in his stomach and knew he needed to sit himself on the toilet . . . NOW. --There was only one problem. He was scheduled to be the third batter that inning. He told the trainer he had to hit the bathroom and he'd rush so he could be done in time to bat. --But he wasn't. --And when the two guys before him got out quickly, he realized he was going to be late to his at-bat. --The crowd started booing and he finally got out to the field after a short delay. He quickly grounded out to end the inning . . . and after that, the manager pulled him and put a different player in center field. --After the game, Pagan and the manager had a meeting and smoothed over the diarrhea incident. --The Mets ended up losing 10-to-nothing. (New York Daily News)

A Woman Went to Flip Another Driver the Bird, Lost Control of Her Car . . . and Flipped it into a Ditch:

Before you start road raging, it's always a good idea to make sure you're actually a better driver than the people around you. Otherwise something like this might happen. --A 23-year-old woman was driving a 2004 Ford Taurus on Monday in Tacoma, Washington, and she wanted to get in the right-hand lane. But a driver in a Subaru Outback was already there. --Since the Outback wouldn't make room for her, the woman responded by flipping off the driver. At least, that was the plan. --When she let go of the wheel, she lost control of the car, hit the back end of the Outback, which FLIPPED over into a ditch next to the road. The woman crashed into the ditch too. --She's has been charged with reckless driving, and was hospitalized with minor injuries, along with both people in the Outback. (KING 5)

A Guy Robs a Bank . . . Then Returns the Money When His Girlfriend Yells at Him:

Communication is key in a successful relationship. If you don't believe me, just ask this bank robber. --On Monday, 36-year-old Otto McNab Jr. decided to rob a bank in Sugarloaf, Pennsylvania (--about 40 miles southwest of Scranton). --He told the teller he had a bomb and would detonate it unless she gave him money. It worked, and he left the bank with $2,262 in cash. --Otto got into the car, where his girlfriend was waiting. (--She wasn't named.) --There was just one problem. He hadn't told her why he was going into the bank, and when she found out he'd robbed the place, she FREAKED OUT. --She yelled at him so much that Otto finally got out of the car, went back into the bank, and RETURNED the money. --He still got arrested, and is charged with robbery and terroristic threats. His girlfriend won't face charges. (Citizens Voice)

A Woman Robs a White Castle by Climbing in Through the Drive-Thru Window:

All in all, this turned out to be a pretty athletically-impressive robbery. But it didn't start out that way . . . --At around 3:00 A.M. on Monday, a 33-year-old woman . . . whose name wasn't released . . . pulled up to a drive-thru window at a White Castle in north St. Louis, Missouri. And she handed the employee a note. --The note demanded they hand over their money . . . and the woman pulled out a GUN. --The employees immediately ran into a back office, locked the door, and called the cops. --Meanwhile, the robber pulled off her first athletic move of the robbery . . . she climbed through the drive-thru window, stole the cash drawer from the register, crawled back out, and took off. --The police tracked her down at her home in Warren, Missouri, which is when she pulled off her second athletic move . . . she jumped THREE STORIES down to the ground to get away. --That stunt injured her, though. She was taken to the hospital with non-fatal injuries and is looking at armed robbery charges. Her gun turned out to be fake. (Riverfront Times)


Random News Extras . . . Random Links to Additional Stories:

Yes, sadly it's true: The total number of people who are unemployed in the U.S. is now bigger than the population of all but four states. And bigger than the population of either Greece or Portugal. (Full Story)

A delightful new study on . . . bedwetting. If a kid wets bed twice a week or more, they'll probably continue until they're teenagers. If both parents wet the bed when they were younger, there's an 80% chance their kids will. If one parent did, there's a 50% chance. And if neither did, there's still a 15% chance. (Full Story)

An outfielder for the St. Louis Cardinals had to leave a game on Monday night against the Dodgers . . . after a moth got stuck in his ear. (Full Story)

Now it's time for 'Things Apple is Worth More Than': All the child support paid last year, times ten . . . every home in Atlanta . . . and ten years of silver production. (Full Story)

How often does this happen? Hopefully, not often. A 15-year-old girl in Colorado ran away, tried to hide the fact that she did it, and created a hoax to make it look like she'd been abducted by drug dealers. (Full Story)


#1.) Here are the Best Videos of the East Coast Earthquake . . . Which Basically Just Show Hanging Plants and Lights Swaying:

As you probably heard, the East Coast got hit by a 5.8 earthquake yesterday. The epicenter was near Mineral, Virginia . . . about 50 miles northwest of Richmond. But millions of people felt it from Georgia to Canada. --Compared to earthquakes in other parts of the world, it was pretty small. For example, the 9.0 earthquake in Japan in March was over a thousand times stronger. --But yesterday's quake still shook a lot of people up, and it was the biggest in the region since 1944. The website has a list of the best videos so far . . . but they're pretty unspectacular. --One shows a car that got crushed by falling debris from a building, but it doesn't show it happen. Another one shows confused people at an office watching the lights on the ceiling swing around. And one shows a hanging plant swaying from side to side. --That's the best there is to offer right now, but they're still updating the list. Needless to say, no deaths have been reported. (--Search for "Gizmodo All the Videos of the East Coast Earthquake.")

#2.) The Band OK GO Did the New Version of the "Muppet Show" Theme . . . and the Video References the Band's Crazy Music Videos:

The new MUPPETS movie comes out November 23rd. And to go with it, they released an album of famous Muppet songs, performed by famous musicians. It's called "The Green Album", and the band OK GO covers "The Muppet Show" theme song. --You probably won't love it . . . unless you're a HUGE Ok Go fan. But the video isn't bad, and they reference the band's crazy music videos, including the treadmill video, the Rube-Goldberg video, and the one with all the dogs. (--"The Green Album" also features Weezer doing "Rainbow Connection", Alkaline Trio doing "Movin' Right Along", and The Fray doing the "Manah Manah" song. Search for "Ok Go Muppet Show Theme.")

#3.) A Guy Woke His Son Up by Recreating the Video Game "Doom" . . . and Shooting Him with a Water Gun:

The next time your kids stay up all night playing video games, here's how to get them up the next day: A guy held a water gun out in front of him while he walked around the house with a camera . . . so it looked like the video game "Doom". --And he started singing the original music from the game. Then he walked into his son's room and started shooting. The kid actually thought it was funny . . . and still didn't get up. (--Search for "Dad's First-Person Shooter Wake Up.")

Five Crazy Ways Your Brain Can Malfunction:

If you're not feeling on top of your game because it's humpday, just be thankful you don't have one of these crazy disorders. Here's a list from of five weird ways your brain can malfunction.

#1.) Fregoli Syndrome. People with severe cases think everyone they meet is the same person. And as you'd imagine, they're also usually paranoid, because they constantly think someone's stalking them or playing a trick. --Fregoli syndrome also pairs up with other disorders: For example, one woman who suffered from it also suffered from something called erotomania (--er-ah-tah-MAY-nia) . . . the belief that someone's in love with you when they aren't. --She thought Erik Estrada from "CHiPs" was madly in love with her . . . and communicated with her telepathically. And she thought EVERYONE was Erik Estrada.

#2.) Visual Agnosia. It's when the image-processing part of your brain shorts out, and you can't identify things for what they are anymore. So, you look at an orange . . . and think it's an elephant. --In one case, a man with visual agnosia sat down for an interview with a neurologist. And at the end of the interview, he thought his wife's head was his HAT and tried to put it on. --The neurologist ended up writing a book about him called "The Man Who Mistook His Wife for a Hat".
#3.) Mirrored-Self Misidentification. It's when there's a breakdown in the part of your brain that understands how reflections work. So when you look in the mirror, you think you're looking at a stranger in a window. --It's extremely rare, but it's most common in Alzheimer's patients.

#4.) Anosognosia. (--Ano-sog-NO-zee-uh) It's when someone who's paralyzed genuinely believes they're NOT. And they make up excuses for why they can't move. --It sounds crazy, but it's actually common in stroke patients. According to several studies, over half of people with stroke-induced paralysis on one side of their body suffer from at least a mild form of it while they're recovering. --And it's not because they're just stubborn and won't admit they're disabled. It's because the area of the brain that controls body perception is damaged.

#5.) Somatoparaphrenia. (--So-muh-tuh-pahr-uh-FREE-nee-uh) It's when there's damage to the part of your brain that knows the map of your body. So you think that one of your limbs . . . like an arm or a foot . . . is someone else's. --In one case, a man denied ownership of an arm AND a foot. He didn't know whose foot it was, but for some reason he thought the arm belonged to a woman he knew named Maria. --Some people who suffer from it even try to have their limbs REMOVED. (


Post a Comment

Subscribe to Post Comments [Atom]

<< Home