HOLLYWOOD DIRT OVERFLOW (03-03-11)
SHEEN-ANIGANS
Brooke Mueller Says Charlie Sheen Threatened to Behead Her . . . And Once Knocked Her Unconscious:
Tuesday night, CHARLIE SHEEN suffered a rare LOSS when his twin sons, Bob and Max, were taken by police and returned to their mom, BROOKE MUELLER. Brooke also got a restraining order against Charlie. --And now we know what caused the courts and the police to act so swiftly. Brooke made some pretty serious allegations against Charlie. --For starters, she says Charlie knocked her out in October of 2009 . . . just a few months before that Christmas Day altercation in Aspen, Colorado in which he allegedly choked her and held a knife to her throat. --In her court papers, she said, quote, "He knocked me to the floor causing me to hit my head on the corner of a couch. I was knocked unconscious and required medical attention, including a CAT scan." --Brooke claims she can back this up with photos of her injuries, testimony from two witnesses and a written apology from Charlie. --Then, after that Christmas Day altercation, Brooke says Charlie told her, quote, "I should have killed you when I had the chance." --We all know that Charlie and Brooke had a falling out during that trip to the Bahamas with "the goddesses" last week. Brooke admits that she fell off the wagon with one of Charlie's girlfriends. --She also says he went off on her . . . spitting on her feet, punching her in the arm and threatening to stick a penknife in her eye. (--It's not clear if this tirade was related to Brooke's drug use.) (--Charlie shared some pictures with RadarOnline.com of drug paraphernalia he allegedly found in Brooke's room in the Bahamas. You can see them here. And here's video of Charlie and one of his "goddesses" discussing Brooke's drug use.) --On the jet to the Bahamas, Brooke says Charlie was telling everybody how he hated his other ex-wife, DENISE RICHARDS, and claimed he was going to, quote, "have her hair shaved off." --At some point, he also dropped another Sheen classic . . . quote, "I'm untouchable! I'm Charlie Sheen! I'm more famous than Obama!" --And Brooke says the only reason the twins were staying with Charlie and his girlfriends is because Charlie took them from her home without permission this past Saturday. (--The twins will be two years old on the 14th of this month.) --She says she tried to get them back, and Charlie threatened to BEHEAD her. He said, quote, "I will cut your head off, put it in a box and send it to your mom." --Brooke isn't the only one Charlie likes to take his rage out on. Apparently, he's also been thinking about putting hits out on people. -Brooke says Charlie recently asked her for $20,000 in cash from child support payments he'd given her . . . because he needed, quote, "untraceable cash" in order to "knock off a few people." --He allegedly told her, quote, "The people I hate violently are going to get severely punished." --Brooke also tried to re-fuel talk of Charlie's anti-Semitism. She said she once received a text from Charlie concerning his manager, Mark Burg. --He allegedly said, quote, "I must execute mark b like the stoopid jew pig that he is." --In her court petition, Brooke kind of states the obvious . . . quote, "I believe [Charlie's] rage is the result of an intense mental issue, rather than simply a reaction to substance abuse." --She adds, quote, "I am very concerned that [Sheen] is currently insane. I am in great fear that he will find me and attack me and I am in great fear for the children's safety while in his care."
Charlie Denies Everything Brooke Mueller Said About Him . . . Obviously:
CHARLIE SHEEN is denying everything BROOKE MUELLER said about him in her court papers the other day. No big surprise there. --In an interview with "People" magazine, he said, quote, "What she's saying is a frigging lie. I'd like to see her drug tests right now. I'd go head-to-head with her on that." (--Brooke has admitted that she's still battling addiction . . . and that she's currently in an outpatient rehab program.) --He also specifically denied he ever sent Brooke a text calling his manager, Mark Burg, a, quote, "stoopid jew pig." He said, quote, "I would never, ever say that about my dear friend Mark." --He accused Brooke of taking his phone and sending texts to get him in trouble. He says he caught her doing it a year ago to, quote, "cause discord among my immediate family." --And he says his "goddesses" caught Brooke using his phone just recently. He adds, quote, "Lies are the fuel that cowards drink." --For the record, Mark Burg himself isn't buying Brooke's claim. He points out that several of the people Charlie works with . . . lawyers, publicists and such . . . are Jewish. --And he adds, quote, "I've known [Charlie Sheen] for 13 years. I don't believe that he actually sent that text. I also know that Brooke Mueller has texted me from Charlie's phone purporting to be Charlie and has done that also to members of his family."
Charlie Sheen Wants His Kids Back:
CHARLIE SHEEN was back on the interview trail yesterday, talking about his new quest . . . which is to get his twin sons back. --On the "Today" show, he spoke directly to BROOKE MUELLER, saying, quote, "Brooke, I'm sorry you felt this had to be done in this way, but this does not display any responsible parenting that I'm familiar with. --"I think that cooler and smarter, leveler heads can prevail, and I urge you to reach out to me, immediately if not sooner, and tell me where our sons are." --But he also took a shot at her parenting, saying, quote, "There's more love, compassion, support, childcare and everything else you could possibly want for a child in this lovely home. --"It's a hundred thousand times better than what's going to be delivered or offered in her house." He added that his goal now is to, quote, "[bring] these two beautiful young men back to the home that they deserve to be raised in." --As for what happened when the cops took the kids Tuesday night, Charlie said, quote, "I stayed very calm and focused. [To my sons] I said, 'I love you.' And I said, 'Don't say goodbye. Say see you later.' And later is, we believe to be, very soon." (--RadarOnline.com was there when Charlie had to hand the kids over, and they got VIDEO. And Charlie's not kidding . . . he was VERY calm and cool about the whole thing. Check it out here. And here's video from "Today".) --In an interview with TMZ, Charlie says he doesn't know where the kids are. He sent a nanny to Brooke's home, and nobody was there. He says, quote, "I'm going crazy. I have to find my children." --Meanwhile, Charlie's daughters . . . 7-year-old Sam and 6-year-old Lola . . . are safe and sound with their mom, DENISE RICHARDS. --A source says, quote, "No way would Denise let her daughters be part of the insanity that's going on right now. Her first priority is Sam and Lola, and she would never allow them to be part of this circus."
Charlie Sheen Has Offended a Real Warlock:
You may have noticed that CHARLIE SHEEN is quite fond of calling himself a WARLOCK these days. --Maybe you find that amusing. But REAL WARLOCKS don't. --CHRISTIAN DAY belongs to the Coven of the Raven Moon in Salem, Massachusetts. And he calls Charlie's flippant uses of the W-word a, quote, "blatant offense against our ways." And he's going to take action. --He says, quote, "I am going to magically bind Mr. Sheen, not to harm him, but to simply prevent him from using this word in such a negative manner in the future. --"If Mr. Sheen is open to it, our coven would be willing to perform a cleansing on both him, his home, and his career." (--Here's a picture of Christian Day.)
Assorted Charlie Sheen Links:
All manner of CHARLIE SHEEN-related websites are popping up. Some are worth your time, some are not. Here are the ones that ARE . . .
--There's a nice Charlie quote generator here. Unfortunately, the site's been getting hit pretty hard with traffic, so you only have a 50-50 shot at actually getting through. The site went down several times last night.
--How about a T-shirt with your favorite Charlie Sheen quote?
--Here are Charlie's quotes on pictures of baby sloths.
--This is probably the best one of them all. It's a collection of quotes from Charlie, mixed with quotes from WILL FERRELL'S "Anchorman" character, Ron Burgundy. Can you guess who said what?
--By the way . . . Charlie did yet another interview with yet another radio show. (--This time it was Karson and Kennedy on Mix 104.1 in Boston.) And he said he doesn't mind if people make money off his lunacy on the Internet.
--He said, quote, "I hope the people that made them are getting rich. They deserve it because they're smart enough to grab it, right?" (--You can listen to the interview here.)
Serena Williams Suffered a Blood Clot in Her Lungs, Followed by a Hematoma:
SERENA WILLIAMS has been battling some pretty serious health issues in recent days. --Less than two weeks ago, she suffered a pulmonary embolism, which is a clot that blocks blood flow to the lungs. It's a very serious condition. --And while she was being treated for that, she suffered a hematoma that required emergency treatment on Monday. (--A hematoma is bleeding under the skin.) --It's not clear where this will leave her tennis career . . . but she's doing well. She issued a statement yesterday saying, quote, "Thank you everyone for all of your prayers, concerns, and support. --"This has been extremely hard, scary, and disappointing. I am doing better, I'm at home now and working with my doctors to keep everything under control." She added, quote, "I know I will be okay, but am praying and hoping this will all be behind me soon. While I can't make any promises now on my return [to tennis], I hope to be back by early summer. --"That said, my main goal is to make sure I get there safely." (--Serena . . . who's 29 . . . won Wimbledon in July . . . then four days later, she sliced her tendon on broken glass while leaving a restaurant in Munich. She hasn't played since.)
A's Outfielder Coco Crisp Was Arrested for DUI:
Oakland A's outfielder COCO CRISP was arrested on suspicion of DUI in Scottsdale, Arizona yesterday morning. --Cops pulled him over because he was having a little trouble keeping his $400,000 2009 Rolls Royce Phantom in a single lane. He was given a field sobriety test . . . which he did not pass. There's no word on his blood-alcohol level. --Coco is in Arizona with the A's for spring training. He was released from jail in time for yesterday's drills. There's no word whether the team plans to punish him. --Not that there's necessarily a connection here, but Coco was one of the Major Leaguers who was taking batting practice with the UCLA team on the day that CHARLIE SHEEN showed up to take a few swings. (--Here's video of Coco talking about that day. He says Charlie did NOT ask to party with him . . . but they did exchange phone numbers.)
Andy Dick Was Caught Snorting Coke in His Car:
RadarOnline.com has posted pictures of ANDY DICK snorting cocaine in his car. They were taken this past Thursday in the parking lot of the Corner Club in Woodland Hills, California. (--Check out the pics here.) --Earlier that night, a witness walked into the club's bathroom and saw Andy . . . shall we say . . . being NURSED by a woman. --The witness says, quote, "They didn't even care or acknowledge me. He was all over her in the men's bathroom, she was lifting her shirt and he was kissing her naked breasts." --The two later retreated to Andy's car, where the coke-sniffing . . . and more "nursing" . . . commenced. The witness says, quote, "They were in their own little world. He was oblivious to everything except the cocaine and the woman with him."
Tom Hanks and Tim Allen Are Teaming Up Again . . . for a Live-Action Movie:
The pairing of TOM HANKS and TIM ALLEN in the "Toy Story" movies has brought in BILLIONS of dollars. But can they produce the cheddar by going LIVE-ACTION? --Hanks and Allen are doing a movie together called "Jungle Cruise" . . . based on the Disney attraction of the same name. --It's an action-adventure starring Hanks as a family man and Allen as a tour boat captain. And that's pretty much all anybody's saying about it at this point.
Are These the Most-Paused Movie Moments?
We all have our favorite movie moments where we hit the pause button and just let our eyes drink it in. And most of those moments involve some kind of NUDITY. --Well, the people at LOVEFiLM . . . which is basically a European version of Netflix . . . polled their subscribers and came up with what they claim are the 10 Most Paused Movie Moments. And yeah, most of them include nudity. Here they are . . .
#1.) Sharon Stone crossing her legs in "Basic Instinct", 31% (--Here's the UNCENSORED video of the leg scene and her sex scene. She drops an Eff-bomb within the first five seconds, and there are plenty of sex sounds after the leg scene.)
#2.) Jennifer Lopez's naked rear in "The Back-Up Plan", 16% (--It's after she's pretty far along into her pregnancy and she's checking herself out unhappily in the mirror. You can see it here. Just skip ahead to the 3:12 mark.)
#3.) Stormtrooper bangs his head, "Star Wars", 15% (Video)
#4.) Jamie Lee Curtis flashing her breasts in "Trading Places", 8% (Video)
#5.) Jessica Rabbit goes commando in "Who Framed Roger Rabbit", 6% (--This one is when she's thrown from the car. As she spins around with her legs spread, you can supposedly see it if you slow it way down on the laser disc version. Here's the video of that scene. And here's a still photo.)
#6.) Brad Pitt flashes behind doctor in hospital in "Fight Club", 5% (--Here's a video that reveals four scenes where Brad Pitt's character Tyler Durden appears as a subliminal message. But BE CAREFUL, because there's a fifth scene at the end of the clip which also shows male genitalia.)
#7.) Captain America's shield appears on desk in "Iron Man 2", 4% (Video)
#8.) Dust spells out "S.F.X." in "The Lion King", 3%
(--This one probably gets a lot of play because it looks so much like it spells "SEX". But it IS S.F.X. It was a self-shout-out inserted by the special effects people. You can see it here.)
#9.) Pac Man's cameo in "Tron", 2% (Video)
#10.) Nicole Kidman flashes her rear end in "Eyes Wide Shut", 1% (Video)
Snooki Admits That She's a Trainwreck on TV:
A new issue of "Rolling Stone" comes out tomorrow and there's an interview with SNOOKI where she admits that she finds it difficult to watch herself being such a trackwreck on "Jersey Shore". --She says, quote, "If I do something stupid, which is pretty much the whole time, I hate it. I just hate it. Obviously, they're only going to put the good stuff in, and the good stuff is us drunk, so all I'm seeing is me drunk and falling down. --"That's how I am when I party, but some of the stuff I do is, like, 'Really, Nicole?' I look like a freakin' alcoholic. I'm like, 'You're sweating, your makeup is running, you look gross.' I just look like (crap)." (--Snooki's real name is Nicole.) --Aside from drinking and partying, Snooki also spends a lot of her "Jersey Shore" screen-time hooking up. But she claims she's only had sex on the show ONCE. --She explains, quote, "The only person I've had sex with on 'Jersey Shore' is my boyfriend. The guys you see me bring home, we're only cuddling and making out like any other person would do, but we're on camera and the whole world's seeing it." --And Snooki admits, quote, "It does look like I'm having sex." --So now that Snooki sees how much of a mess she is on "Jersey Shore", is she planning on making her next gig something classier? No, of course not. --She says, quote, "When 'Jersey Shore' ends I'm going to do more spin-offs. If MTV doesn't want them, another network will be, like, 'What does Snooki do now?' or 'Snooki's getting married!' --"What I'd like is to turn out like Jessica Simpson, with her whole brand. She makes millions . . . I'm trying to build an empire, because after this I can't get a normal job. I mean, how do I go and sit behind a desk?"
Jessica Simpson Is a "Frontrunner" to join Simon Cowell's "X Factor":
(--Speaking of Jessica Simpson's brand . . .) "People" magazine has a so-called "show insider" telling them that JESSICA SIMPSON is one of the "frontrunners" to be a judge on SIMON COWELL'S "X Factor". --The source adds that they're still talking to a lot of people . . . and that there are, quote, "loads of conversations happening," but no one has been offered a spot yet. --Supposedly, Jessica is, quote, "keen" on doing it. (--Which doesn't really mean much, except that this anonymous "show insider" is likely BRITISH.)
Christina Aguilera *Will* Be a Judge on "The Voice":
It's official: CHRISTINA AGUILERA will join CEE LO GREEN and MAROON 5 singer ADAM LEVINE as a judge (slash) coach on the NBC singing competition show, "The Voice". (--This is the show where the judges will have their backs turned to the contestants during the auditions, so they'll choose their talent based on their voice ONLY . . . not their appearance.) (--It debuts on April 26th. CARSON DALY hosts.) --This isn't the first time Christina has been in the news this week . . . because Christina has been partaking in some of CHARLIE SHEEN'S brand of winning. --Christina was arrested for public intoxication early Tuesday morning, while her boyfriend was popped for DUI. She's not in any real trouble yet . . . but if you believe the tabloids, she's been slipping into a DOWNWARD SPIRAL.
Thursday TV Reminders: (--Check your local listings.)
--"American Idol" [Results Show] . . . 8:00 to 10:00 P.M. on Fox. (--The Top 10 are announced. Plus, Jennifer Lopez premieres her music video "On the Floor".)
--"Police Women of Cincinnati" [5th Season Finale] . . . 9:00 to 10:00 P.M. on TLC.
--"Beyond Scared Straight" [1st Season Finale] . . . 10:00 to 11:00 P.M. on A&E.
BIEBER FEVER
Justin Bieber's Hair Sold for Over $40,000:
Remember that lock of hair that JUSTIN BIEBER gave to ELLEN DEGENERES to auction off for charity? Well, it sold . . . for a LOT of money. --Ellen sold the hair on eBay for $40,668. She's donating the money to an animal rescue charity called The Gentle Barn. --But the prize DID include more than just some strands of hair. First, it came in a clear display box, which Justin also signed. --And the winning bidder was supposed to have the opportunity to meet Justin on a future episode of "Ellen", but that probably won't be happening after all. --That's because the buyer is the online casino GoldenPalace.com, which regularly buys celebrity memorabilia online. (--They bought WILLIAM SHATNER'S kidney stone back in 2005 for $21,000. Shatner used that money to help buy a house for a family left homeless by Hurricane Katrina.) --In a statement, GoldenPalace says they plan to put the hair on tour at Justin's concerts to raise even more money for charity. (--It's unclear how that will work.) (--But REAL, rich teenage girls aren't out of luck yet. Justin previously insinuated that there would be multiple sales of his hair for charity.)
Justin Bieber Flips Off the Paparazzi . . . and Even That Is Cute:
JUSTIN BIEBER was out celebrating his birthday with SELENA GOMEZ on Tuesday night . . . and at some point, the paparazzi got under his skin. --Justin lost his cool, and he flipped the photographers off. Despite the obvious naughtiness, there was an element of CUTENESS for the teenage girls out there . . . because Justin's middle finger had a BAND-AID on it. (--Naturally, there's a picture of this. Here it is. And yeah, that's Selena next to him in the picture. You have to get over it. She's his girlfriend. Sorry, kids.) --Justin has apologized for the gesture on Twitter . . . saying, quote, "I'm normal. [I] had a great [birthday] and at the end of the night we got surrounded by [paparazzi] and I reacted in a way I know better. I'm sorry #KillThemWithKindness. --"It's not always easy, but I know better than to react in anger. Life has its ups and downs, but you guys are always there for me. I will make my mistakes, but I promise to continue to grow with you and try to do [what's] right." (--Well done, Justin. 17-year-old stars have done worse things than flipping off the paparazzi . . . for some reason TAYLOR MOMSEN comes to mind . . . and no one, not even the paparazzi themselves, would doubt that they deserved it.)
Selena Gomez's Was *Not* Assaulted By One of Justin Bieber's Fans:
A rumor has been making the rounds . . . on the sites your daughter hits up . . . claiming that one of JUSTIN BIEBER'S fans PUNCHED his girl, SELENA GOMEZ in the face. --The visual proof is a picture of her supposedly with a "fat lip." (--Here it is.) --Selena's rep says there's, quote, "absolutely no truth" to this. (--Bieber Nation: This is NOT cool! Bieber Fever is about LOVE not WAR. Bieber-Fan-on-Bieber-Girlfriend crime doesn't show your love for Justin . . . it only shows your love for YOURSELF!)
Kim Kardashian's First Single Has Been Unleashed:
KIM KARDASHIAN premiered her debut single "Jam (Turn It Up)" on RYAN SEACREST'S radio show yesterday. And it's more of a club track than anything. --Kim "sings," quote, "Feeling so good / feeling so right / got my hands up . . . Celebrate like it's my birthday / five more shots of tequila, I'm thirsty." (--Listen to "Jam (Turn It Up)", here. NOTE: It includes audio tags for Ryan's show. The song begins at the 50-second mark. It'll be on iTunes soon.) (--Kim is donating all the proceeds to St. Jude Children's Research Hospital. Which seems like a low-down, dirty way to get people to buy it. But once you hear it, you'll understand why she thought it was necessary.)
A New Britney Spears Track Has Hit the Internet:
BRITNEY SPEARS' producer DR. LUKE has released a "snippet" of a new Britney track called "Seal It with a Kiss". It'll be on Britney's new album, "Femme Fatale", which comes out March 29th. (--You can check it out, here.) --By the way, Dr. Luke is countersuing THE BELLAMY BROTHERS, who are STILL pursuing legal action against Britney for supposedly ripping off THEIR song title. (--You can revisit that bizarre claim, here.) --Dr. Luke claims the Bellamy Brothers' lawsuit is a "smear campaign," and a, quote, "publicity stunt aimed to increase their record sales . . . and to combat their dwindling relevance." The Bellamys haven't responded to that.
Sammy Hagar Thinks There's a 90% Chance His Version of Van Halen Will Reunite . . . and He's Serious About That:
SAMMY HAGAR has been through two pretty gnarly splits from VAN HALEN, and yet he'd still be up for another run . . . under one condition: --And that is: EDDIE VAN HALEN cleans up his act . . . meaning: He gets sober. That's because Sammy claims Eddie's alcoholism led to their most recent split, after Van Halen's 2004 reunion tour. --Of course, a reunion would also have to mean that Eddie would want Sammy back. And at least for now, that doesn't seem anywhere CLOSE to happening. (--The band is working on new music with original singer DAVID LEE ROTH.) --Regardless, Sammy is almost GUARANTEEING it'll happen before he dies. --"Rolling Stone" asked him what the chances of that happening were and he said, quote, "I'd say it's up there around 90%. I would love to make another record with Van Halen. If Eddie was totally cool, and was back to the guy I used to know, or a new guy, not the guy I knew. --"He can't be that guy. I wouldn't do it if he was like that . . . But if Eddie really got his life together, which it seems he has judging by the pictures I've seen, then definitely." --But he does admit that NOTHING is imminent, quote, "Right now, zero chance . . . but someday, before we all die, (eff) yeah. We might be in our 90s though." (--Eddie has reunited with David Lee Roth twice, and has made up with Sammy before so I suppose anything is possible . . . but judging by how things have gone over the past few years, I definitely can't see this happening soon.)
And Now, Beyoncé Says She's Donated Her Gaddafi Money:
After NELLY FURTADO said that she was donating the $1 million she got for performing for the family of Libyan dictator Muammar Gaddafi, BEYONCÉ has announced that she too has donated her fee to charity. --Her rep says that she donated her Gaddafi fee to the Haiti earthquake relief efforts "over a year ago." The rep added, quote, "Once it became known that the [money] was linked to the Gaddafi family, the decision was made to put that payment to a good cause." --They didn't say how much it was, but it is believed to have been $1 million. (--I hate to be a pessimist, but couldn't an artist just tag a past donation as the money they got from the Gaddafi family after the fact? I'm just wondering aloud . . .)
Adele Sold 352,000 Copies of "21" To Top This Week's "Billboard" Chart:
British soul singer ADELE tops the "Billboard" album chart this week. Her second album "21", sold 352,000 copies in its first week of release. Just like her first album, "19", the title is the age she was when she wrote the songs.
1.) (NEW) "21", Adele (352,000 copies)
2.) "Never Say Never: The Remixes", Justin Bieber (102,000 copies)
3.) "Sigh No More", Mumford & Sons (71,000 copies)
Lady Antebellum's Hillary Scott Was Turned Down for "American Idol" . . . Twice:
LADY ANTEBELLUM'S HILLARY SCOTT is a big fan of "American Idol" . . . even though she auditioned twice, and was REJECTED both times. She told "Entertainment Tonight", quote, "I never even got to see (the judges). --"I literally performed for the production assistants and the interns, and I just didn't make it." -But Hillary has no hard feelings. In fact, she's totally getting into this year's "Idol". She says, quote, "I'm a huge fan of the show. I think the judges are awesome. I think the talent looks great." (--Do you know someone who's super-talented but didn't make the cut at "American Idol"? Not some lame performer you think "got robbed". I'm talking a legitimate act that is carving out a decent career despite the snub.)
THURSDAY'S SHOWBIZ EXTRAS
CHARLIE SHEEN'S "Two and a Half Men" co-star, JON CRYER, filmed a comedy skit for today's "Ellen DeGeneres Show". Ellen finds him working as a temp receptionist, since he's currently out of work. (Full Story)
CHELSEA HANDLER told CONAN O'BRIEN last night that she's not into sex with redheads. (Full Story)
ZSA ZSA GABOR was hospitalized AGAIN yesterday, because there was no blood flow in her left leg. (--It was her RIGHT leg that was amputated.) (Full Story)
There's a new version of the sci-fi classic "Blade Runner" in the works. There's no word on casting yet. The 1982 original was directed by Ridley Scott, and starred Harrison Ford and Rutger Hauer. (Full Story)
DIANE LANE will play Martha Kent . . . Superman's adoptive Earth-mother . . . in the upcoming "Superman" reboot. (Full Story)
MICK JAGGER'S younger brother Chris told a Portuguese TV station that Mick was working on a solo album, with help from DAVE STEWART of the EURYTHMICS. And that's the most official word we have on that. (Full Story)
KEITH RICHARDS' 25-year-old daughter Theodora, who's a model, was busted Tuesday night in New York. She was allegedly tagging a building, and in possession of marijuana. She's facing two graffiti charges and two drug charges. (Full Story)
MICHAEL LOHAN will be on the fifth season of "Celebrity Rehab". The rest of the cast includes: Former baseball player Dwight "Doc" Gooden, former "Baywatch" kid Jeremy Jackson, and Tareq and Michaele Salahi . . . the couple that crashed a White House party, and then ended up on "Real Housewives". (Full Story)
NAZZY’S RANDOM STUFF
NOT-SO-STUPID NEWS
When a Boy Falls Into a Well, His Mom Doesn't Just Sit By and Wait for Help . . . She Goes Down the Well Herself To Save Him:
A few days ago, Amy Prentice of Bartlesville, Oklahoma was in her yard with her kids . . . a seven-year-old boy named Nathan and a six-year-old girl named Sammy. And the kids started climbing on the rock wall of an old well in their yard. --Nathan fell in . . . and fell 30 feet before he hit the water at the bottom. --And Amy's reaction was HARDCORE. Instead of calling for help . . . or, ya know, calling for Lassie . . . she WENT DOWN THE WELL after him. --Nathan was injured . . . he had blood all over his head and his neck . . . and Amy wanted to be with him so he wouldn't go into shock. She climbed down using rocks and pipes to keep her footing, and started calming her son down. --Luckily, a neighbor called the fire department. They were able to rescue Amy and Nathan in about 45 minutes. -Nathan needed staples to fix a head wound, but otherwise he's okay. Amy just had a few scrapes. --She says another neighbor has volunteered to fill in the well. (NBC 2 - Tulsa)
Would You Buy Your Wedding Dress At Costco?
When you're shopping for a wedding dress, there's about to be a new option . . . one far, far away from the overpriced boutique bridal shops. In fact, this one's set up at the same place you buy 96 packs of soap and giant tubs of mayonnaise. --Costco is getting into the wedding dress game. --Costco just announced a partnership with a wedding dress designer named Kirstie Kelly. She's making six exclusive dress designs that will sell at Costco . . . for much cheaper than her dresses sell elsewhere. --Kelly's designs normally run up to $4,000 . . . the six Costco dresses will range in price from $600 to $1,399. --They'll be available in sizes two to 24. --And even though they're less expensive than most wedding dresses, Kelly says they're still going to maintain her strong commitment to quality . . . with luxury fabrics and embellishments like lace, crystals, and pearls. --Costco will start selling the dresses through special bridal events. You can go to Costco.com to see if and when they're going to hold one in your area, and even make an appointment. (--Check out the direct link here.) (Aisle Dash)
One Out of Every Two Shopping Carts Has E. Coli On the Handle:
You know how most grocery stores have a little container of sanitizing wipes next to the grocery carts? FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, use them to wipe down your cart's handle before you shop. --We all know grocery cart handles are filthy. But according to a new study by the University of Arizona, they're even filthier than you could've imagined. --In their study, they found that 50% of shopping carts had E. COLI on the handle. In case you're a little fuzzy on the math there, that's one out of every two carts. --It gets worse: 72% of the shopping carts they tested, quote, "contained a marker for fecal bacteria." --While some strains of E. coli are basically harmless, other ones can make you legitimately sick. And even if you wash your hands, the E. coli from your cart is still getting awfully close to your food. --Charles Gerba is a professor of soil, water, and environment, and led the study. He says, quote, "There's more [bacteria] than you find in a supermarket's restroom. --"That's because they use disinfecting cleaners in the restrooms. Nobody routinely cleans and disinfects shopping carts." (AOL News)
In This Economy, Even Rich People Are Eating Fast Food:
Next time you pull up to Arby's and see a Rolls-Royce in the parking lot, and a guy inside with a top hat and monocle going to town on a Beef 'N Cheddar, here's the explanation. --According to a study by American Express, thanks to the economy, rich people have started going to fast food restaurants more than ever. -In the last three months of 2010, American Express's richest clients had a 4% increase in fast food spending. Their spending at more expensive restaurants declined 4%. --With the economy recovering slowly, they've found that everyone's prioritizing their spending, even rich people . . . and eating out doesn't seem to be that high on people's lists. --In other words, they'd be more willing to spend on a vacation . . . but then eat Burger King once they're there. (CNN Money)
The Catholic Church Is Removing All References To "Booty" From the Bible:
Man, if KC and the Sunshine Band are Catholic, they're gonna hate this decision. --The U.S. Conference of Catholic Bishops have conferred and decided to release a new version of the official English-language Catholic Bible. And that edition is completely scrubbed of all references to BOOTY. --Now, when the Bible says booty, it's not in reference to, like, Jesus telling the prostitutes to drop it like it's hot. It uses "booty" the way that we think of pirates using the word "booty", to refer to the riches you get from war. --But, to the Catholic bishops, "booty" is too evocative in the modern buttock context . . . so it's been replaced with the word "spoils." --There are plenty of Catholic Bibles in English . . . at least a few dozen . . . and, for now, the booty dropping is only happening in the bishops' official version, the New American Bible. --This new version comes out next week on Ash Wednesday. (USA Today)
A Woman Is Suing a 99-Cent Store Because She Slipped and Fell On . . . A Banana Peel:
Ever since slapstick comedy was invented, people have been slipping on banana peels. Even though in real life, we're pretty sure no one in HISTORY has ever ACTUALLY slipped on a banana peel. They're really not all that slippery. --But 58-year-old Ida Valentine of Fontana, California has changed all that. Last April, Ida was shopping at a 99 Cents Only store in Fontana, and yes, she actually slipped on a banana peel. --There was a banana peel on the floor, Ida stepped on it, lost her balance, and crashed down, buttocks first. --She suffered a herniated disk and tissue damage. Her medical bills ran close to $9,000. So now she's suing the store for an undisclosed amount. --The 99 Cents Only higher-ups offered her a $44,000 settlement . . . which she rejected. --No one from the 99 Cents Only chain had any comment. (Reuters)
Phoenix, Arizona May Not Actually Be the Kidnapping Capital of the U.S. . . . It Looks Like They Fabricated the Statistics To Get Funding:
In 2009, the Phoenix police department reported that the city saw 350 kidnappings in the previous year . . . almost one a day. Which is an INSANE amount of kidnappings. --That didn't just make it the Kidnapping Capital of the U.S. That made it the second-most dangerous city for kidnappings in the ENTIRE WORLD, after Mexico City. So the federal government responded by giving Phoenix a $1.7 MILLION grant. --Last December, the government started getting suspicious. How could Phoenix's kidnapping number be THAT much higher than the rest of the country? So the Office of the Inspector General ordered an audit. --The results of that audit are in and . . . yeah, Phoenix was lying. --Turns out the Phoenix police counted about 100 crimes as kidnappings that weren't really kidnappings. They wanted that federal grant money . . . and thought this would be the best way to get it. --Jack Harris is the Phoenix Chief of Police. He said he's not going to resign over this, and that Phoenix DOES having a major kidnapping problem. --There's no word on what actions could be taken against Harris or the department by the city or the federal government. (AZFamily.com)
Texas Lawmakers Have Proposed a Law That Would Impose Harsh Penalties for Hiring an Illegal Immigrant . . . Unless They're Your Maid or Gardener:
There's something that feels so WRONG here. It's like some state representatives in Texas want it both ways. They want to be brutal on illegal immigrants . . . but they sure as hell don't want to pay AMERICAN wages for childcare or yard work. --Debbie Riddle is a Republican in Texas's House of Representatives. And she's proposed a new law that would get you up to TWO YEARS in jail and a $10,000 fine for intentionally or knowingly hiring an illegal immigrant. --EXCEPT . . . if you hire them to be your maid, housekeeper, or gardener. (???) --Riddle and other state representatives say that illegal immigrants are THE number one issue that their constituents bring up to them. They want something done about the huge influx from Mexico. --But as much as Texans are opposed to illegal immigrants . . . they're not opposed enough to stop paying them below minimum wage to work on their house. --Riddle says that if the law DIDN'T have an exception for maids and gardeners, quote, "a large segment of the Texas population [would end up] in prison." --Her chief of staff says her bill isn't targeting individuals, but is really focusing on big businesses that hire illegals. --Other immigration bills floating around in Texas include one that would add an 8% surcharge to any money wired from Texas to Latin America . . . and one that would require cops to ask EVERYONE they pull over what their citizenship status is. --There's no word on when any of these could be put to a vote. (CNN)
A Houston Police Officer Is Suspended for Using Tear Gas On His Opponents at a Barbecue Cook-Off:
51-year-old Mike Hamby is a 30-year veteran police officer with the Houston Police Department. He was off-duty over the weekend, and he and some friends had a team at the Houston rodeo's barbecue cook-off. --Apparently, Mike takes his barbecue contests VERY seriously. --According to reports, Mike threw a canister of TEAR GAS into an opposing team's booth. Several people at the cook-off got sick, including some AMPUTEE military veterans who were there in wheelchairs and couldn't avoid the gas. --Mike was relieved of duty while he's under investigation. The Houston PD hasn't released the potential charges Mike is facing. --According to records, since he joined the police in December of 1980, he's had seven previous internal affairs complaints. They include misconduct, improper procedure, and two unnamed accidents. --There were 330 teams at the cook-off and more than 117,000 people attended. (Houston Chronicle)
MEATBALL CRIMINALS
A Man Runs Over a Pedestrian . . . Then Goes To a Store, Buys Chips and a Drink, and Calls In a Fake Carjacking:
This is one sick, sick man. Who runs over a stranger, leaves them for dead . . . and then has a craving for chips and a drink? --On December 23rd, 2009, 26-year-old Jeremy Lane of Chattanooga, Tennessee was driving home drunk when he RAN OVER a 42-year-old mother of two named Susan Wood. --Lane fled the scene, drove off, and went straight to a gas station. Where he bought himself some chips . . . a soda . . . and then called the cops to phone in a FAKE CARJACKING to cover for the hit-and-run. --Susan died from the injuries. --Detectives were easily able to find the holes in Lane's story and connect him to the hit-and-run. He was arrested and charged with filing a false report, leaving the scene, DUI, and vehicular homicide. --Lane is on trial now. He's already pleaded guilty to the lesser counts . . . filing a false report and leaving the scene. Now the trial is going on for the DUI and vehicular homicide charges. --He could be facing at least 20 years in prison. (Chattanooga Times Free Press)
A Man Drives For 35 Miles and Hits 100 Miles-Per-Hour . . . With His Wife On the Hood Clinging To His Windshield Wiper:
I know this is a story about a really sad fight between a husband and a wife that escalated WAY, WAY too far . . . but all I can think about is how this woman has found her true calling as a stuntwoman. --On Saturday, 36-year-old Christopher Carroll of Manteca, California got into a fight with his wife. Her name hasn't been released. Christopher threatened to leave, and got into the family minivan. She got on the hood of the van to stop him. --Only it didn't work: He started DRIVING. She held on. He kept going. She held on to a windshield wiper blade. He went to the FREEWAY. She kept holding on. --When all was said and done, Carroll drove 35 MILES with his wife on the hood of the minivan . . . in 30-degree weather . . . and even hit speeds as fast as 100 MILES-PER-HOUR. She never let go, and never fell. --Two people called 911. By the time police arrived, Carroll had slowed down and his wife had safely rolled off the hood. A witness took her to the hospital where she was treated for hypothermia. --Carroll was arrested and charged with attempted murder, kidnapping, and domestic assault. About a week earlier, Carroll had been arrested for being under the influence of a controlled substance, then released. (San Jose Mercury News)
RANDOM NEWS EXTRAS
Better late than never: A new book by the Pope explains why the Jews weren't responsible for killing Jesus. (Full Story)
There's a 61-year-old diabetic man in Oregon with no feeling in his feet. And he woke up on Tuesday to find that his dog had eaten part of his right foot, including three toes. A vet says that the dog may have just been trying to rid his owner of dead tissue, especially if it was infected or gangrenous. (Full Story)
According to a new study on the usage of 635 condoms by 77 women at a reproductive health clinic: 7.9% broke or slipped off, 1.1% broke outright, and 2% leaked. (Full Story)
Volkswagen is resurrecting their hippie microbus. The prototype has an electric motor, and uses an iPad to control the radio. But it's shorter and wider than the original, so it looks a little like a minivan. (Full Story)
A litter of sick three-month-old puppies was left outside an Oklahoma dog shelter, euthanized, declared dead, and left in a dumpster . . . but one of them was found alive the next morning, and is looking for a home. (Full Story)
Nine sixth graders in Washington state have been expelled for running a "fight club" at school and in homes. (Full Story)
Tomorrow's Friday, and we have good news: New research suggests that alcohol consumption can help stave off dementia! (Full Story)
A woman in Southern California was crushed to death while trying to stop a tow truck from repossessing her car. (Full Story)
Awful News: New surveillance video shows a woman shopping at Target a mile away, when a fire destroyed the home daycare center she was operating, killing the four children she'd left alone. (Full Story)
STUPID VIDEOS OF THE DAY
#1.) A Group in Russia Protested the Police . . . By Having Women Kiss Female Cops:
The Russian police force is known as the "militsia." It's also known for being corrupt. So in a rebranding effort, the Russian government decided to change the name to "politsia" . . . which obviously does nothing to solve the corruption problem. --So a political group came up with a weird and somewhat arousing way to protest. They had women search out female cops in the subways and on the streets . . . and KISS them. --There's a new video of it on YouTube that shows dozens of female cops being aggressively kissed, and almost all of them freak out. (--Search for "Russia Mass Kissing Stunt." One of the best struggles is at 1:00.)
#2.) A Girl Couldn't Close One of Her Eyes After a Visit to the Dentist:
Remember the David After Dentist video, where the kid's all hopped up on Novocain? It's gotten over 80 million views on YouTube since 2009. I mention it because there's a new dentist video online that you should also check out. --In this one, a girl walks out of the dentist after having a wisdom tooth pulled, and she can SORT of talk . . . but because of the Novocain, she can't move the left half of her face, or close her right eye. At one point she says, "I'm going to poop myself." (--Search for "Girl Can't Close Eye After Wisdom Tooth Surgery.")
Is Charlie Sheen Bipolar? Here Are the Main Symptoms:
A lot of doctors are suggesting that CHARLIE SHEEN is bipolar, and when you look at the list of symptoms, it's easy to see why. --Bipolar disorder basically has two stages: In one, you have a lot of energy. But then you crash and slip into major depression. --In case you know someone who might be bipolar . . . or you just want to understand the brain of America's biggest "winner" . . . here are the main symptoms. --The stage when the person has a lot of energy . . . like Charlie Sheen does . . . is called "bipolar mania" or "hypomania", and it has five signs:
#1.) Euphoria or Irritability. Charlie Sheen seems to have both.
#2.) Excessive Talking and Racing Thoughts . . . which describes every interview he's done in the past week.
#3.) Inflated Self-Esteem. Charlie's been going on and on about how much better he is than "normal" people. Nevermind that he thinks he's a "warlock."
#4.) Unusual Energy and Less Need for Sleep. "Unusual" is probably an understatement for the level of energy he seems to have right now.
#5.) Impulsiveness and a Reckless Pursuit of Gratification. This includes big shopping sprees, promiscuous sex, high-risk investments, and fast driving. --And it also includes a sudden urge to travel, which Charlie Sheen did when he flew to the Bahamas immediately after "Two and a Half Men" shut down last week.
--Now, here are some of the DARKER symptoms of bipolar disorder, which Charlie Sheen hasn't been displaying . . . yet. --Depression . . . low self-esteem . . . low energy levels . . . sadness, loneliness, helplessness, and guilt . . . slowed speech, fatigue, and bad coordination . . . Insomnia OR orversleeping . . . poor concentration . . . and suicidal thoughts --That's why some doctors say Charlie Sheen needs help NOW. (WebMD.com)
Brooke Mueller Says Charlie Sheen Threatened to Behead Her . . . And Once Knocked Her Unconscious:
Tuesday night, CHARLIE SHEEN suffered a rare LOSS when his twin sons, Bob and Max, were taken by police and returned to their mom, BROOKE MUELLER. Brooke also got a restraining order against Charlie. --And now we know what caused the courts and the police to act so swiftly. Brooke made some pretty serious allegations against Charlie. --For starters, she says Charlie knocked her out in October of 2009 . . . just a few months before that Christmas Day altercation in Aspen, Colorado in which he allegedly choked her and held a knife to her throat. --In her court papers, she said, quote, "He knocked me to the floor causing me to hit my head on the corner of a couch. I was knocked unconscious and required medical attention, including a CAT scan." --Brooke claims she can back this up with photos of her injuries, testimony from two witnesses and a written apology from Charlie. --Then, after that Christmas Day altercation, Brooke says Charlie told her, quote, "I should have killed you when I had the chance." --We all know that Charlie and Brooke had a falling out during that trip to the Bahamas with "the goddesses" last week. Brooke admits that she fell off the wagon with one of Charlie's girlfriends. --She also says he went off on her . . . spitting on her feet, punching her in the arm and threatening to stick a penknife in her eye. (--It's not clear if this tirade was related to Brooke's drug use.) (--Charlie shared some pictures with RadarOnline.com of drug paraphernalia he allegedly found in Brooke's room in the Bahamas. You can see them here. And here's video of Charlie and one of his "goddesses" discussing Brooke's drug use.) --On the jet to the Bahamas, Brooke says Charlie was telling everybody how he hated his other ex-wife, DENISE RICHARDS, and claimed he was going to, quote, "have her hair shaved off." --At some point, he also dropped another Sheen classic . . . quote, "I'm untouchable! I'm Charlie Sheen! I'm more famous than Obama!" --And Brooke says the only reason the twins were staying with Charlie and his girlfriends is because Charlie took them from her home without permission this past Saturday. (--The twins will be two years old on the 14th of this month.) --She says she tried to get them back, and Charlie threatened to BEHEAD her. He said, quote, "I will cut your head off, put it in a box and send it to your mom." --Brooke isn't the only one Charlie likes to take his rage out on. Apparently, he's also been thinking about putting hits out on people. -Brooke says Charlie recently asked her for $20,000 in cash from child support payments he'd given her . . . because he needed, quote, "untraceable cash" in order to "knock off a few people." --He allegedly told her, quote, "The people I hate violently are going to get severely punished." --Brooke also tried to re-fuel talk of Charlie's anti-Semitism. She said she once received a text from Charlie concerning his manager, Mark Burg. --He allegedly said, quote, "I must execute mark b like the stoopid jew pig that he is." --In her court petition, Brooke kind of states the obvious . . . quote, "I believe [Charlie's] rage is the result of an intense mental issue, rather than simply a reaction to substance abuse." --She adds, quote, "I am very concerned that [Sheen] is currently insane. I am in great fear that he will find me and attack me and I am in great fear for the children's safety while in his care."
Charlie Denies Everything Brooke Mueller Said About Him . . . Obviously:
CHARLIE SHEEN is denying everything BROOKE MUELLER said about him in her court papers the other day. No big surprise there. --In an interview with "People" magazine, he said, quote, "What she's saying is a frigging lie. I'd like to see her drug tests right now. I'd go head-to-head with her on that." (--Brooke has admitted that she's still battling addiction . . . and that she's currently in an outpatient rehab program.) --He also specifically denied he ever sent Brooke a text calling his manager, Mark Burg, a, quote, "stoopid jew pig." He said, quote, "I would never, ever say that about my dear friend Mark." --He accused Brooke of taking his phone and sending texts to get him in trouble. He says he caught her doing it a year ago to, quote, "cause discord among my immediate family." --And he says his "goddesses" caught Brooke using his phone just recently. He adds, quote, "Lies are the fuel that cowards drink." --For the record, Mark Burg himself isn't buying Brooke's claim. He points out that several of the people Charlie works with . . . lawyers, publicists and such . . . are Jewish. --And he adds, quote, "I've known [Charlie Sheen] for 13 years. I don't believe that he actually sent that text. I also know that Brooke Mueller has texted me from Charlie's phone purporting to be Charlie and has done that also to members of his family."
Charlie Sheen Wants His Kids Back:
CHARLIE SHEEN was back on the interview trail yesterday, talking about his new quest . . . which is to get his twin sons back. --On the "Today" show, he spoke directly to BROOKE MUELLER, saying, quote, "Brooke, I'm sorry you felt this had to be done in this way, but this does not display any responsible parenting that I'm familiar with. --"I think that cooler and smarter, leveler heads can prevail, and I urge you to reach out to me, immediately if not sooner, and tell me where our sons are." --But he also took a shot at her parenting, saying, quote, "There's more love, compassion, support, childcare and everything else you could possibly want for a child in this lovely home. --"It's a hundred thousand times better than what's going to be delivered or offered in her house." He added that his goal now is to, quote, "[bring] these two beautiful young men back to the home that they deserve to be raised in." --As for what happened when the cops took the kids Tuesday night, Charlie said, quote, "I stayed very calm and focused. [To my sons] I said, 'I love you.' And I said, 'Don't say goodbye. Say see you later.' And later is, we believe to be, very soon." (--RadarOnline.com was there when Charlie had to hand the kids over, and they got VIDEO. And Charlie's not kidding . . . he was VERY calm and cool about the whole thing. Check it out here. And here's video from "Today".) --In an interview with TMZ, Charlie says he doesn't know where the kids are. He sent a nanny to Brooke's home, and nobody was there. He says, quote, "I'm going crazy. I have to find my children." --Meanwhile, Charlie's daughters . . . 7-year-old Sam and 6-year-old Lola . . . are safe and sound with their mom, DENISE RICHARDS. --A source says, quote, "No way would Denise let her daughters be part of the insanity that's going on right now. Her first priority is Sam and Lola, and she would never allow them to be part of this circus."
Charlie Sheen Has Offended a Real Warlock:
You may have noticed that CHARLIE SHEEN is quite fond of calling himself a WARLOCK these days. --Maybe you find that amusing. But REAL WARLOCKS don't. --CHRISTIAN DAY belongs to the Coven of the Raven Moon in Salem, Massachusetts. And he calls Charlie's flippant uses of the W-word a, quote, "blatant offense against our ways." And he's going to take action. --He says, quote, "I am going to magically bind Mr. Sheen, not to harm him, but to simply prevent him from using this word in such a negative manner in the future. --"If Mr. Sheen is open to it, our coven would be willing to perform a cleansing on both him, his home, and his career." (--Here's a picture of Christian Day.)
Assorted Charlie Sheen Links:
All manner of CHARLIE SHEEN-related websites are popping up. Some are worth your time, some are not. Here are the ones that ARE . . .
--There's a nice Charlie quote generator here. Unfortunately, the site's been getting hit pretty hard with traffic, so you only have a 50-50 shot at actually getting through. The site went down several times last night.
--How about a T-shirt with your favorite Charlie Sheen quote?
--Here are Charlie's quotes on pictures of baby sloths.
--This is probably the best one of them all. It's a collection of quotes from Charlie, mixed with quotes from WILL FERRELL'S "Anchorman" character, Ron Burgundy. Can you guess who said what?
--By the way . . . Charlie did yet another interview with yet another radio show. (--This time it was Karson and Kennedy on Mix 104.1 in Boston.) And he said he doesn't mind if people make money off his lunacy on the Internet.
--He said, quote, "I hope the people that made them are getting rich. They deserve it because they're smart enough to grab it, right?" (--You can listen to the interview here.)
Serena Williams Suffered a Blood Clot in Her Lungs, Followed by a Hematoma:
SERENA WILLIAMS has been battling some pretty serious health issues in recent days. --Less than two weeks ago, she suffered a pulmonary embolism, which is a clot that blocks blood flow to the lungs. It's a very serious condition. --And while she was being treated for that, she suffered a hematoma that required emergency treatment on Monday. (--A hematoma is bleeding under the skin.) --It's not clear where this will leave her tennis career . . . but she's doing well. She issued a statement yesterday saying, quote, "Thank you everyone for all of your prayers, concerns, and support. --"This has been extremely hard, scary, and disappointing. I am doing better, I'm at home now and working with my doctors to keep everything under control." She added, quote, "I know I will be okay, but am praying and hoping this will all be behind me soon. While I can't make any promises now on my return [to tennis], I hope to be back by early summer. --"That said, my main goal is to make sure I get there safely." (--Serena . . . who's 29 . . . won Wimbledon in July . . . then four days later, she sliced her tendon on broken glass while leaving a restaurant in Munich. She hasn't played since.)
A's Outfielder Coco Crisp Was Arrested for DUI:
Oakland A's outfielder COCO CRISP was arrested on suspicion of DUI in Scottsdale, Arizona yesterday morning. --Cops pulled him over because he was having a little trouble keeping his $400,000 2009 Rolls Royce Phantom in a single lane. He was given a field sobriety test . . . which he did not pass. There's no word on his blood-alcohol level. --Coco is in Arizona with the A's for spring training. He was released from jail in time for yesterday's drills. There's no word whether the team plans to punish him. --Not that there's necessarily a connection here, but Coco was one of the Major Leaguers who was taking batting practice with the UCLA team on the day that CHARLIE SHEEN showed up to take a few swings. (--Here's video of Coco talking about that day. He says Charlie did NOT ask to party with him . . . but they did exchange phone numbers.)
Andy Dick Was Caught Snorting Coke in His Car:
RadarOnline.com has posted pictures of ANDY DICK snorting cocaine in his car. They were taken this past Thursday in the parking lot of the Corner Club in Woodland Hills, California. (--Check out the pics here.) --Earlier that night, a witness walked into the club's bathroom and saw Andy . . . shall we say . . . being NURSED by a woman. --The witness says, quote, "They didn't even care or acknowledge me. He was all over her in the men's bathroom, she was lifting her shirt and he was kissing her naked breasts." --The two later retreated to Andy's car, where the coke-sniffing . . . and more "nursing" . . . commenced. The witness says, quote, "They were in their own little world. He was oblivious to everything except the cocaine and the woman with him."
Tom Hanks and Tim Allen Are Teaming Up Again . . . for a Live-Action Movie:
The pairing of TOM HANKS and TIM ALLEN in the "Toy Story" movies has brought in BILLIONS of dollars. But can they produce the cheddar by going LIVE-ACTION? --Hanks and Allen are doing a movie together called "Jungle Cruise" . . . based on the Disney attraction of the same name. --It's an action-adventure starring Hanks as a family man and Allen as a tour boat captain. And that's pretty much all anybody's saying about it at this point.
Are These the Most-Paused Movie Moments?
We all have our favorite movie moments where we hit the pause button and just let our eyes drink it in. And most of those moments involve some kind of NUDITY. --Well, the people at LOVEFiLM . . . which is basically a European version of Netflix . . . polled their subscribers and came up with what they claim are the 10 Most Paused Movie Moments. And yeah, most of them include nudity. Here they are . . .
#1.) Sharon Stone crossing her legs in "Basic Instinct", 31% (--Here's the UNCENSORED video of the leg scene and her sex scene. She drops an Eff-bomb within the first five seconds, and there are plenty of sex sounds after the leg scene.)
#2.) Jennifer Lopez's naked rear in "The Back-Up Plan", 16% (--It's after she's pretty far along into her pregnancy and she's checking herself out unhappily in the mirror. You can see it here. Just skip ahead to the 3:12 mark.)
#3.) Stormtrooper bangs his head, "Star Wars", 15% (Video)
#4.) Jamie Lee Curtis flashing her breasts in "Trading Places", 8% (Video)
#5.) Jessica Rabbit goes commando in "Who Framed Roger Rabbit", 6% (--This one is when she's thrown from the car. As she spins around with her legs spread, you can supposedly see it if you slow it way down on the laser disc version. Here's the video of that scene. And here's a still photo.)
#6.) Brad Pitt flashes behind doctor in hospital in "Fight Club", 5% (--Here's a video that reveals four scenes where Brad Pitt's character Tyler Durden appears as a subliminal message. But BE CAREFUL, because there's a fifth scene at the end of the clip which also shows male genitalia.)
#7.) Captain America's shield appears on desk in "Iron Man 2", 4% (Video)
#8.) Dust spells out "S.F.X." in "The Lion King", 3%
(--This one probably gets a lot of play because it looks so much like it spells "SEX". But it IS S.F.X. It was a self-shout-out inserted by the special effects people. You can see it here.)
#9.) Pac Man's cameo in "Tron", 2% (Video)
#10.) Nicole Kidman flashes her rear end in "Eyes Wide Shut", 1% (Video)
Snooki Admits That She's a Trainwreck on TV:
A new issue of "Rolling Stone" comes out tomorrow and there's an interview with SNOOKI where she admits that she finds it difficult to watch herself being such a trackwreck on "Jersey Shore". --She says, quote, "If I do something stupid, which is pretty much the whole time, I hate it. I just hate it. Obviously, they're only going to put the good stuff in, and the good stuff is us drunk, so all I'm seeing is me drunk and falling down. --"That's how I am when I party, but some of the stuff I do is, like, 'Really, Nicole?' I look like a freakin' alcoholic. I'm like, 'You're sweating, your makeup is running, you look gross.' I just look like (crap)." (--Snooki's real name is Nicole.) --Aside from drinking and partying, Snooki also spends a lot of her "Jersey Shore" screen-time hooking up. But she claims she's only had sex on the show ONCE. --She explains, quote, "The only person I've had sex with on 'Jersey Shore' is my boyfriend. The guys you see me bring home, we're only cuddling and making out like any other person would do, but we're on camera and the whole world's seeing it." --And Snooki admits, quote, "It does look like I'm having sex." --So now that Snooki sees how much of a mess she is on "Jersey Shore", is she planning on making her next gig something classier? No, of course not. --She says, quote, "When 'Jersey Shore' ends I'm going to do more spin-offs. If MTV doesn't want them, another network will be, like, 'What does Snooki do now?' or 'Snooki's getting married!' --"What I'd like is to turn out like Jessica Simpson, with her whole brand. She makes millions . . . I'm trying to build an empire, because after this I can't get a normal job. I mean, how do I go and sit behind a desk?"
Jessica Simpson Is a "Frontrunner" to join Simon Cowell's "X Factor":
(--Speaking of Jessica Simpson's brand . . .) "People" magazine has a so-called "show insider" telling them that JESSICA SIMPSON is one of the "frontrunners" to be a judge on SIMON COWELL'S "X Factor". --The source adds that they're still talking to a lot of people . . . and that there are, quote, "loads of conversations happening," but no one has been offered a spot yet. --Supposedly, Jessica is, quote, "keen" on doing it. (--Which doesn't really mean much, except that this anonymous "show insider" is likely BRITISH.)
Christina Aguilera *Will* Be a Judge on "The Voice":
It's official: CHRISTINA AGUILERA will join CEE LO GREEN and MAROON 5 singer ADAM LEVINE as a judge (slash) coach on the NBC singing competition show, "The Voice". (--This is the show where the judges will have their backs turned to the contestants during the auditions, so they'll choose their talent based on their voice ONLY . . . not their appearance.) (--It debuts on April 26th. CARSON DALY hosts.) --This isn't the first time Christina has been in the news this week . . . because Christina has been partaking in some of CHARLIE SHEEN'S brand of winning. --Christina was arrested for public intoxication early Tuesday morning, while her boyfriend was popped for DUI. She's not in any real trouble yet . . . but if you believe the tabloids, she's been slipping into a DOWNWARD SPIRAL.
Thursday TV Reminders: (--Check your local listings.)
--"American Idol" [Results Show] . . . 8:00 to 10:00 P.M. on Fox. (--The Top 10 are announced. Plus, Jennifer Lopez premieres her music video "On the Floor".)
--"Police Women of Cincinnati" [5th Season Finale] . . . 9:00 to 10:00 P.M. on TLC.
--"Beyond Scared Straight" [1st Season Finale] . . . 10:00 to 11:00 P.M. on A&E.
BIEBER FEVER
Justin Bieber's Hair Sold for Over $40,000:
Remember that lock of hair that JUSTIN BIEBER gave to ELLEN DEGENERES to auction off for charity? Well, it sold . . . for a LOT of money. --Ellen sold the hair on eBay for $40,668. She's donating the money to an animal rescue charity called The Gentle Barn. --But the prize DID include more than just some strands of hair. First, it came in a clear display box, which Justin also signed. --And the winning bidder was supposed to have the opportunity to meet Justin on a future episode of "Ellen", but that probably won't be happening after all. --That's because the buyer is the online casino GoldenPalace.com, which regularly buys celebrity memorabilia online. (--They bought WILLIAM SHATNER'S kidney stone back in 2005 for $21,000. Shatner used that money to help buy a house for a family left homeless by Hurricane Katrina.) --In a statement, GoldenPalace says they plan to put the hair on tour at Justin's concerts to raise even more money for charity. (--It's unclear how that will work.) (--But REAL, rich teenage girls aren't out of luck yet. Justin previously insinuated that there would be multiple sales of his hair for charity.)
Justin Bieber Flips Off the Paparazzi . . . and Even That Is Cute:
JUSTIN BIEBER was out celebrating his birthday with SELENA GOMEZ on Tuesday night . . . and at some point, the paparazzi got under his skin. --Justin lost his cool, and he flipped the photographers off. Despite the obvious naughtiness, there was an element of CUTENESS for the teenage girls out there . . . because Justin's middle finger had a BAND-AID on it. (--Naturally, there's a picture of this. Here it is. And yeah, that's Selena next to him in the picture. You have to get over it. She's his girlfriend. Sorry, kids.) --Justin has apologized for the gesture on Twitter . . . saying, quote, "I'm normal. [I] had a great [birthday] and at the end of the night we got surrounded by [paparazzi] and I reacted in a way I know better. I'm sorry #KillThemWithKindness. --"It's not always easy, but I know better than to react in anger. Life has its ups and downs, but you guys are always there for me. I will make my mistakes, but I promise to continue to grow with you and try to do [what's] right." (--Well done, Justin. 17-year-old stars have done worse things than flipping off the paparazzi . . . for some reason TAYLOR MOMSEN comes to mind . . . and no one, not even the paparazzi themselves, would doubt that they deserved it.)
Selena Gomez's Was *Not* Assaulted By One of Justin Bieber's Fans:
A rumor has been making the rounds . . . on the sites your daughter hits up . . . claiming that one of JUSTIN BIEBER'S fans PUNCHED his girl, SELENA GOMEZ in the face. --The visual proof is a picture of her supposedly with a "fat lip." (--Here it is.) --Selena's rep says there's, quote, "absolutely no truth" to this. (--Bieber Nation: This is NOT cool! Bieber Fever is about LOVE not WAR. Bieber-Fan-on-Bieber-Girlfriend crime doesn't show your love for Justin . . . it only shows your love for YOURSELF!)
Kim Kardashian's First Single Has Been Unleashed:
KIM KARDASHIAN premiered her debut single "Jam (Turn It Up)" on RYAN SEACREST'S radio show yesterday. And it's more of a club track than anything. --Kim "sings," quote, "Feeling so good / feeling so right / got my hands up . . . Celebrate like it's my birthday / five more shots of tequila, I'm thirsty." (--Listen to "Jam (Turn It Up)", here. NOTE: It includes audio tags for Ryan's show. The song begins at the 50-second mark. It'll be on iTunes soon.) (--Kim is donating all the proceeds to St. Jude Children's Research Hospital. Which seems like a low-down, dirty way to get people to buy it. But once you hear it, you'll understand why she thought it was necessary.)
A New Britney Spears Track Has Hit the Internet:
BRITNEY SPEARS' producer DR. LUKE has released a "snippet" of a new Britney track called "Seal It with a Kiss". It'll be on Britney's new album, "Femme Fatale", which comes out March 29th. (--You can check it out, here.) --By the way, Dr. Luke is countersuing THE BELLAMY BROTHERS, who are STILL pursuing legal action against Britney for supposedly ripping off THEIR song title. (--You can revisit that bizarre claim, here.) --Dr. Luke claims the Bellamy Brothers' lawsuit is a "smear campaign," and a, quote, "publicity stunt aimed to increase their record sales . . . and to combat their dwindling relevance." The Bellamys haven't responded to that.
Sammy Hagar Thinks There's a 90% Chance His Version of Van Halen Will Reunite . . . and He's Serious About That:
SAMMY HAGAR has been through two pretty gnarly splits from VAN HALEN, and yet he'd still be up for another run . . . under one condition: --And that is: EDDIE VAN HALEN cleans up his act . . . meaning: He gets sober. That's because Sammy claims Eddie's alcoholism led to their most recent split, after Van Halen's 2004 reunion tour. --Of course, a reunion would also have to mean that Eddie would want Sammy back. And at least for now, that doesn't seem anywhere CLOSE to happening. (--The band is working on new music with original singer DAVID LEE ROTH.) --Regardless, Sammy is almost GUARANTEEING it'll happen before he dies. --"Rolling Stone" asked him what the chances of that happening were and he said, quote, "I'd say it's up there around 90%. I would love to make another record with Van Halen. If Eddie was totally cool, and was back to the guy I used to know, or a new guy, not the guy I knew. --"He can't be that guy. I wouldn't do it if he was like that . . . But if Eddie really got his life together, which it seems he has judging by the pictures I've seen, then definitely." --But he does admit that NOTHING is imminent, quote, "Right now, zero chance . . . but someday, before we all die, (eff) yeah. We might be in our 90s though." (--Eddie has reunited with David Lee Roth twice, and has made up with Sammy before so I suppose anything is possible . . . but judging by how things have gone over the past few years, I definitely can't see this happening soon.)
And Now, Beyoncé Says She's Donated Her Gaddafi Money:
After NELLY FURTADO said that she was donating the $1 million she got for performing for the family of Libyan dictator Muammar Gaddafi, BEYONCÉ has announced that she too has donated her fee to charity. --Her rep says that she donated her Gaddafi fee to the Haiti earthquake relief efforts "over a year ago." The rep added, quote, "Once it became known that the [money] was linked to the Gaddafi family, the decision was made to put that payment to a good cause." --They didn't say how much it was, but it is believed to have been $1 million. (--I hate to be a pessimist, but couldn't an artist just tag a past donation as the money they got from the Gaddafi family after the fact? I'm just wondering aloud . . .)
Adele Sold 352,000 Copies of "21" To Top This Week's "Billboard" Chart:
British soul singer ADELE tops the "Billboard" album chart this week. Her second album "21", sold 352,000 copies in its first week of release. Just like her first album, "19", the title is the age she was when she wrote the songs.
1.) (NEW) "21", Adele (352,000 copies)
2.) "Never Say Never: The Remixes", Justin Bieber (102,000 copies)
3.) "Sigh No More", Mumford & Sons (71,000 copies)
Lady Antebellum's Hillary Scott Was Turned Down for "American Idol" . . . Twice:
LADY ANTEBELLUM'S HILLARY SCOTT is a big fan of "American Idol" . . . even though she auditioned twice, and was REJECTED both times. She told "Entertainment Tonight", quote, "I never even got to see (the judges). --"I literally performed for the production assistants and the interns, and I just didn't make it." -But Hillary has no hard feelings. In fact, she's totally getting into this year's "Idol". She says, quote, "I'm a huge fan of the show. I think the judges are awesome. I think the talent looks great." (--Do you know someone who's super-talented but didn't make the cut at "American Idol"? Not some lame performer you think "got robbed". I'm talking a legitimate act that is carving out a decent career despite the snub.)
THURSDAY'S SHOWBIZ EXTRAS
CHARLIE SHEEN'S "Two and a Half Men" co-star, JON CRYER, filmed a comedy skit for today's "Ellen DeGeneres Show". Ellen finds him working as a temp receptionist, since he's currently out of work. (Full Story)
CHELSEA HANDLER told CONAN O'BRIEN last night that she's not into sex with redheads. (Full Story)
ZSA ZSA GABOR was hospitalized AGAIN yesterday, because there was no blood flow in her left leg. (--It was her RIGHT leg that was amputated.) (Full Story)
There's a new version of the sci-fi classic "Blade Runner" in the works. There's no word on casting yet. The 1982 original was directed by Ridley Scott, and starred Harrison Ford and Rutger Hauer. (Full Story)
DIANE LANE will play Martha Kent . . . Superman's adoptive Earth-mother . . . in the upcoming "Superman" reboot. (Full Story)
MICK JAGGER'S younger brother Chris told a Portuguese TV station that Mick was working on a solo album, with help from DAVE STEWART of the EURYTHMICS. And that's the most official word we have on that. (Full Story)
KEITH RICHARDS' 25-year-old daughter Theodora, who's a model, was busted Tuesday night in New York. She was allegedly tagging a building, and in possession of marijuana. She's facing two graffiti charges and two drug charges. (Full Story)
MICHAEL LOHAN will be on the fifth season of "Celebrity Rehab". The rest of the cast includes: Former baseball player Dwight "Doc" Gooden, former "Baywatch" kid Jeremy Jackson, and Tareq and Michaele Salahi . . . the couple that crashed a White House party, and then ended up on "Real Housewives". (Full Story)
NAZZY’S RANDOM STUFF
NOT-SO-STUPID NEWS
When a Boy Falls Into a Well, His Mom Doesn't Just Sit By and Wait for Help . . . She Goes Down the Well Herself To Save Him:
A few days ago, Amy Prentice of Bartlesville, Oklahoma was in her yard with her kids . . . a seven-year-old boy named Nathan and a six-year-old girl named Sammy. And the kids started climbing on the rock wall of an old well in their yard. --Nathan fell in . . . and fell 30 feet before he hit the water at the bottom. --And Amy's reaction was HARDCORE. Instead of calling for help . . . or, ya know, calling for Lassie . . . she WENT DOWN THE WELL after him. --Nathan was injured . . . he had blood all over his head and his neck . . . and Amy wanted to be with him so he wouldn't go into shock. She climbed down using rocks and pipes to keep her footing, and started calming her son down. --Luckily, a neighbor called the fire department. They were able to rescue Amy and Nathan in about 45 minutes. -Nathan needed staples to fix a head wound, but otherwise he's okay. Amy just had a few scrapes. --She says another neighbor has volunteered to fill in the well. (NBC 2 - Tulsa)
Would You Buy Your Wedding Dress At Costco?
When you're shopping for a wedding dress, there's about to be a new option . . . one far, far away from the overpriced boutique bridal shops. In fact, this one's set up at the same place you buy 96 packs of soap and giant tubs of mayonnaise. --Costco is getting into the wedding dress game. --Costco just announced a partnership with a wedding dress designer named Kirstie Kelly. She's making six exclusive dress designs that will sell at Costco . . . for much cheaper than her dresses sell elsewhere. --Kelly's designs normally run up to $4,000 . . . the six Costco dresses will range in price from $600 to $1,399. --They'll be available in sizes two to 24. --And even though they're less expensive than most wedding dresses, Kelly says they're still going to maintain her strong commitment to quality . . . with luxury fabrics and embellishments like lace, crystals, and pearls. --Costco will start selling the dresses through special bridal events. You can go to Costco.com to see if and when they're going to hold one in your area, and even make an appointment. (--Check out the direct link here.) (Aisle Dash)
One Out of Every Two Shopping Carts Has E. Coli On the Handle:
You know how most grocery stores have a little container of sanitizing wipes next to the grocery carts? FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, use them to wipe down your cart's handle before you shop. --We all know grocery cart handles are filthy. But according to a new study by the University of Arizona, they're even filthier than you could've imagined. --In their study, they found that 50% of shopping carts had E. COLI on the handle. In case you're a little fuzzy on the math there, that's one out of every two carts. --It gets worse: 72% of the shopping carts they tested, quote, "contained a marker for fecal bacteria." --While some strains of E. coli are basically harmless, other ones can make you legitimately sick. And even if you wash your hands, the E. coli from your cart is still getting awfully close to your food. --Charles Gerba is a professor of soil, water, and environment, and led the study. He says, quote, "There's more [bacteria] than you find in a supermarket's restroom. --"That's because they use disinfecting cleaners in the restrooms. Nobody routinely cleans and disinfects shopping carts." (AOL News)
In This Economy, Even Rich People Are Eating Fast Food:
Next time you pull up to Arby's and see a Rolls-Royce in the parking lot, and a guy inside with a top hat and monocle going to town on a Beef 'N Cheddar, here's the explanation. --According to a study by American Express, thanks to the economy, rich people have started going to fast food restaurants more than ever. -In the last three months of 2010, American Express's richest clients had a 4% increase in fast food spending. Their spending at more expensive restaurants declined 4%. --With the economy recovering slowly, they've found that everyone's prioritizing their spending, even rich people . . . and eating out doesn't seem to be that high on people's lists. --In other words, they'd be more willing to spend on a vacation . . . but then eat Burger King once they're there. (CNN Money)
The Catholic Church Is Removing All References To "Booty" From the Bible:
Man, if KC and the Sunshine Band are Catholic, they're gonna hate this decision. --The U.S. Conference of Catholic Bishops have conferred and decided to release a new version of the official English-language Catholic Bible. And that edition is completely scrubbed of all references to BOOTY. --Now, when the Bible says booty, it's not in reference to, like, Jesus telling the prostitutes to drop it like it's hot. It uses "booty" the way that we think of pirates using the word "booty", to refer to the riches you get from war. --But, to the Catholic bishops, "booty" is too evocative in the modern buttock context . . . so it's been replaced with the word "spoils." --There are plenty of Catholic Bibles in English . . . at least a few dozen . . . and, for now, the booty dropping is only happening in the bishops' official version, the New American Bible. --This new version comes out next week on Ash Wednesday. (USA Today)
A Woman Is Suing a 99-Cent Store Because She Slipped and Fell On . . . A Banana Peel:
Ever since slapstick comedy was invented, people have been slipping on banana peels. Even though in real life, we're pretty sure no one in HISTORY has ever ACTUALLY slipped on a banana peel. They're really not all that slippery. --But 58-year-old Ida Valentine of Fontana, California has changed all that. Last April, Ida was shopping at a 99 Cents Only store in Fontana, and yes, she actually slipped on a banana peel. --There was a banana peel on the floor, Ida stepped on it, lost her balance, and crashed down, buttocks first. --She suffered a herniated disk and tissue damage. Her medical bills ran close to $9,000. So now she's suing the store for an undisclosed amount. --The 99 Cents Only higher-ups offered her a $44,000 settlement . . . which she rejected. --No one from the 99 Cents Only chain had any comment. (Reuters)
Phoenix, Arizona May Not Actually Be the Kidnapping Capital of the U.S. . . . It Looks Like They Fabricated the Statistics To Get Funding:
In 2009, the Phoenix police department reported that the city saw 350 kidnappings in the previous year . . . almost one a day. Which is an INSANE amount of kidnappings. --That didn't just make it the Kidnapping Capital of the U.S. That made it the second-most dangerous city for kidnappings in the ENTIRE WORLD, after Mexico City. So the federal government responded by giving Phoenix a $1.7 MILLION grant. --Last December, the government started getting suspicious. How could Phoenix's kidnapping number be THAT much higher than the rest of the country? So the Office of the Inspector General ordered an audit. --The results of that audit are in and . . . yeah, Phoenix was lying. --Turns out the Phoenix police counted about 100 crimes as kidnappings that weren't really kidnappings. They wanted that federal grant money . . . and thought this would be the best way to get it. --Jack Harris is the Phoenix Chief of Police. He said he's not going to resign over this, and that Phoenix DOES having a major kidnapping problem. --There's no word on what actions could be taken against Harris or the department by the city or the federal government. (AZFamily.com)
Texas Lawmakers Have Proposed a Law That Would Impose Harsh Penalties for Hiring an Illegal Immigrant . . . Unless They're Your Maid or Gardener:
There's something that feels so WRONG here. It's like some state representatives in Texas want it both ways. They want to be brutal on illegal immigrants . . . but they sure as hell don't want to pay AMERICAN wages for childcare or yard work. --Debbie Riddle is a Republican in Texas's House of Representatives. And she's proposed a new law that would get you up to TWO YEARS in jail and a $10,000 fine for intentionally or knowingly hiring an illegal immigrant. --EXCEPT . . . if you hire them to be your maid, housekeeper, or gardener. (???) --Riddle and other state representatives say that illegal immigrants are THE number one issue that their constituents bring up to them. They want something done about the huge influx from Mexico. --But as much as Texans are opposed to illegal immigrants . . . they're not opposed enough to stop paying them below minimum wage to work on their house. --Riddle says that if the law DIDN'T have an exception for maids and gardeners, quote, "a large segment of the Texas population [would end up] in prison." --Her chief of staff says her bill isn't targeting individuals, but is really focusing on big businesses that hire illegals. --Other immigration bills floating around in Texas include one that would add an 8% surcharge to any money wired from Texas to Latin America . . . and one that would require cops to ask EVERYONE they pull over what their citizenship status is. --There's no word on when any of these could be put to a vote. (CNN)
A Houston Police Officer Is Suspended for Using Tear Gas On His Opponents at a Barbecue Cook-Off:
51-year-old Mike Hamby is a 30-year veteran police officer with the Houston Police Department. He was off-duty over the weekend, and he and some friends had a team at the Houston rodeo's barbecue cook-off. --Apparently, Mike takes his barbecue contests VERY seriously. --According to reports, Mike threw a canister of TEAR GAS into an opposing team's booth. Several people at the cook-off got sick, including some AMPUTEE military veterans who were there in wheelchairs and couldn't avoid the gas. --Mike was relieved of duty while he's under investigation. The Houston PD hasn't released the potential charges Mike is facing. --According to records, since he joined the police in December of 1980, he's had seven previous internal affairs complaints. They include misconduct, improper procedure, and two unnamed accidents. --There were 330 teams at the cook-off and more than 117,000 people attended. (Houston Chronicle)
MEATBALL CRIMINALS
A Man Runs Over a Pedestrian . . . Then Goes To a Store, Buys Chips and a Drink, and Calls In a Fake Carjacking:
This is one sick, sick man. Who runs over a stranger, leaves them for dead . . . and then has a craving for chips and a drink? --On December 23rd, 2009, 26-year-old Jeremy Lane of Chattanooga, Tennessee was driving home drunk when he RAN OVER a 42-year-old mother of two named Susan Wood. --Lane fled the scene, drove off, and went straight to a gas station. Where he bought himself some chips . . . a soda . . . and then called the cops to phone in a FAKE CARJACKING to cover for the hit-and-run. --Susan died from the injuries. --Detectives were easily able to find the holes in Lane's story and connect him to the hit-and-run. He was arrested and charged with filing a false report, leaving the scene, DUI, and vehicular homicide. --Lane is on trial now. He's already pleaded guilty to the lesser counts . . . filing a false report and leaving the scene. Now the trial is going on for the DUI and vehicular homicide charges. --He could be facing at least 20 years in prison. (Chattanooga Times Free Press)
A Man Drives For 35 Miles and Hits 100 Miles-Per-Hour . . . With His Wife On the Hood Clinging To His Windshield Wiper:
I know this is a story about a really sad fight between a husband and a wife that escalated WAY, WAY too far . . . but all I can think about is how this woman has found her true calling as a stuntwoman. --On Saturday, 36-year-old Christopher Carroll of Manteca, California got into a fight with his wife. Her name hasn't been released. Christopher threatened to leave, and got into the family minivan. She got on the hood of the van to stop him. --Only it didn't work: He started DRIVING. She held on. He kept going. She held on to a windshield wiper blade. He went to the FREEWAY. She kept holding on. --When all was said and done, Carroll drove 35 MILES with his wife on the hood of the minivan . . . in 30-degree weather . . . and even hit speeds as fast as 100 MILES-PER-HOUR. She never let go, and never fell. --Two people called 911. By the time police arrived, Carroll had slowed down and his wife had safely rolled off the hood. A witness took her to the hospital where she was treated for hypothermia. --Carroll was arrested and charged with attempted murder, kidnapping, and domestic assault. About a week earlier, Carroll had been arrested for being under the influence of a controlled substance, then released. (San Jose Mercury News)
RANDOM NEWS EXTRAS
Better late than never: A new book by the Pope explains why the Jews weren't responsible for killing Jesus. (Full Story)
There's a 61-year-old diabetic man in Oregon with no feeling in his feet. And he woke up on Tuesday to find that his dog had eaten part of his right foot, including three toes. A vet says that the dog may have just been trying to rid his owner of dead tissue, especially if it was infected or gangrenous. (Full Story)
According to a new study on the usage of 635 condoms by 77 women at a reproductive health clinic: 7.9% broke or slipped off, 1.1% broke outright, and 2% leaked. (Full Story)
Volkswagen is resurrecting their hippie microbus. The prototype has an electric motor, and uses an iPad to control the radio. But it's shorter and wider than the original, so it looks a little like a minivan. (Full Story)
A litter of sick three-month-old puppies was left outside an Oklahoma dog shelter, euthanized, declared dead, and left in a dumpster . . . but one of them was found alive the next morning, and is looking for a home. (Full Story)
Nine sixth graders in Washington state have been expelled for running a "fight club" at school and in homes. (Full Story)
Tomorrow's Friday, and we have good news: New research suggests that alcohol consumption can help stave off dementia! (Full Story)
A woman in Southern California was crushed to death while trying to stop a tow truck from repossessing her car. (Full Story)
Awful News: New surveillance video shows a woman shopping at Target a mile away, when a fire destroyed the home daycare center she was operating, killing the four children she'd left alone. (Full Story)
STUPID VIDEOS OF THE DAY
#1.) A Group in Russia Protested the Police . . . By Having Women Kiss Female Cops:
The Russian police force is known as the "militsia." It's also known for being corrupt. So in a rebranding effort, the Russian government decided to change the name to "politsia" . . . which obviously does nothing to solve the corruption problem. --So a political group came up with a weird and somewhat arousing way to protest. They had women search out female cops in the subways and on the streets . . . and KISS them. --There's a new video of it on YouTube that shows dozens of female cops being aggressively kissed, and almost all of them freak out. (--Search for "Russia Mass Kissing Stunt." One of the best struggles is at 1:00.)
#2.) A Girl Couldn't Close One of Her Eyes After a Visit to the Dentist:
Remember the David After Dentist video, where the kid's all hopped up on Novocain? It's gotten over 80 million views on YouTube since 2009. I mention it because there's a new dentist video online that you should also check out. --In this one, a girl walks out of the dentist after having a wisdom tooth pulled, and she can SORT of talk . . . but because of the Novocain, she can't move the left half of her face, or close her right eye. At one point she says, "I'm going to poop myself." (--Search for "Girl Can't Close Eye After Wisdom Tooth Surgery.")
Is Charlie Sheen Bipolar? Here Are the Main Symptoms:
A lot of doctors are suggesting that CHARLIE SHEEN is bipolar, and when you look at the list of symptoms, it's easy to see why. --Bipolar disorder basically has two stages: In one, you have a lot of energy. But then you crash and slip into major depression. --In case you know someone who might be bipolar . . . or you just want to understand the brain of America's biggest "winner" . . . here are the main symptoms. --The stage when the person has a lot of energy . . . like Charlie Sheen does . . . is called "bipolar mania" or "hypomania", and it has five signs:
#1.) Euphoria or Irritability. Charlie Sheen seems to have both.
#2.) Excessive Talking and Racing Thoughts . . . which describes every interview he's done in the past week.
#3.) Inflated Self-Esteem. Charlie's been going on and on about how much better he is than "normal" people. Nevermind that he thinks he's a "warlock."
#4.) Unusual Energy and Less Need for Sleep. "Unusual" is probably an understatement for the level of energy he seems to have right now.
#5.) Impulsiveness and a Reckless Pursuit of Gratification. This includes big shopping sprees, promiscuous sex, high-risk investments, and fast driving. --And it also includes a sudden urge to travel, which Charlie Sheen did when he flew to the Bahamas immediately after "Two and a Half Men" shut down last week.
--Now, here are some of the DARKER symptoms of bipolar disorder, which Charlie Sheen hasn't been displaying . . . yet. --Depression . . . low self-esteem . . . low energy levels . . . sadness, loneliness, helplessness, and guilt . . . slowed speech, fatigue, and bad coordination . . . Insomnia OR orversleeping . . . poor concentration . . . and suicidal thoughts --That's why some doctors say Charlie Sheen needs help NOW. (WebMD.com)
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