Thursday, April 14, 2011


Jennifer Lopez Is the Most Beautiful Person in the World . . . According to "People" Magazine:

magazine drops its Most Beautiful People issue this week . . . and they give the top honor to JENNIFER LOPEZ. --Jennifer tells the magazine that being beautiful is PART OF HER JOB . . . and she adds, quote, "I don't want anybody thinking it's easy. It does take time and it's hard work. HDTV wide-screen is nobody's friend!" --But Jennifer says she's happiest when she's being a mom to her 3-year-old twins Max and Emme . . . and doesn't have to fuss with her appearance. --She says, quote, "Just being able to touch my face and rub my eyes and put my fingers in my hair and not having to worry about messing it up. It's so much better." --Still, she also embraces her image as a diva . . . quote, "I kind of like it. We've kind of owned it now. But I certainly don't like and I've never been a person who has what they call 'diva behavior,' which is something they tried to pin on me for a long time." --On Ryan Seacrest's radio show yesterday, Jennifer said she was flattered and excited to receive the honor because, quote, "I'm not 20 years old anymore." (--She's 41.) --This is J-Lo's 10th appearance on the list, putting her in third place among the all-timers. Halle Berry leads with 15 appearances, followed by Julia Roberts with 12. George Clooney is tied with Jennifer at 10, and Brad Pitt has nine.


Who Else Made "People" Magazine's Most List?

Here are some of the other names on "People's"
Most Beautiful list. They're not in any order . . .

--Ryan Reynolds . . . (--Who is also "People's" reigning Sexiest Man Alive.)


--Zac Efron


--Reese Witherspoon


--Jessica Simpson


--Sofia Vergara


--Christina Hendricks


--Helen Mirren


--Mandy Moore


--Katie Holmes


--Jennifer Hudson


--"Twilight" stud Kellan Lutz


--Dana Delany


--Emma Stone


--Sandra Bullock


--Eva Longoria


--Amanda Seyfried


--Kendra Wilkinson


--Robert Pattinson


--Megan Fox


--Shia LaBeouf


--Lea Michele




--Amy Adams


--Eva Mendes


--Diane Lane


--Demi Moore


--Christie Brinkley


--Jane Seymour


(--Check out more at


Are Scarlett Johansson and Sean Penn Living Together?

Just three months into their relationship, SCARLETT JOHANSSON has reportedly moved into SEAN PENN'S Malibu home. --And by the way . . . it's also less than four months since she and RYAN REYNOLDS filed for divorce from each other. --You have to wonder what it's like for them to be playing house. Scarlett is barely older than Sean's kids. She's 26. Sean's daughter Dylan is 20 . . . and his son Hopper is 17. (--Sean is 50.)


Is Kim Kardashian Moving to New York For Her Boyfriend?

Sources say that KIM KARDASHIAN is moving to New York City for her boyfriend KRIS HUMPHRIES . . . who plays for the New York Knicks. --The source also expects Kim to be engaged by this summer.


Catherine Zeta-Jones Is Being Treated for Bipolar Disorder:

CATHERINE ZETA-JONES is not bi-winning . . . she's BIPOLAR. --Her rep announced yesterday, quote, "After dealing with the stress of the past year, Catherine made the decision to check in to a mental health facility for a brief stay to treat her Bipolar 2 disorder. --"She's feeling great and looking forward to starting work this week on her two upcoming films." --The past year for Catherine has been all about husband MICHAEL DOUGLAS' battle with throat cancer. --It probably didn't help Catherine's stress level that Michael's son CAMERON was sentenced to five years in prison for dealing cocaine and meth. --A source says Catherine wanted to get treatment before she started working again to make sure she's, quote, "in top form." --Bipolar 2 tends to have more depression that lasts longer . . . while the "up" or "manic" periods are less elevated and don't last as long.


The Top-Selling Celebrity Fragrances: has put together a list of the Top-Selling Celebrity Fragrances and what they made last year. Here they are . . .


--Elizabeth Taylor's White Diamonds, $54 million


--Derek Jeter's Driven, $27 million


--Beyoncé's Heat, $21 million


--Diddy's Unforgivable, $18 million


--Sarah Jessica Parker's NYC, $18 million


--Jessica Simpson's Fancy, $18 million


--Gwen Stefani's Harajuku Lovers, $18 million


--Usher's Usher for Men, $16 milion


--Jennifer Lopez's Glow, $12 million


--Reese Witherspoon's In Bloom, $12 million


Kobe Bryant Has Been Fined $100,000 For Yelling a Gay Slur at a Ref:

The NBA has fined KOBE BRYANT $100,000 for yelling a GAY SLUR at a ref during Tuesday night's game between the Lakers and the Spurs. --It happened after referee Bennie Adams hit Kobe with his fourth technical foul of the night. -Kobe hit the bench . . . and his lips could clearly be seen forming that gay slur that starts with the letter "F" and rhymes with the last name of the man who tickles my funny bone more than any other comedian in the game today, BOB SAGET. --He actually said, "(Effin') (Saget)." (--Check out the video here. It happens at about the 35-second mark.) --Several gay groups went after Kobe, and demanded he be punished. So Kobe issued a statement of SORT-OF apology. --He said, quote, "What I said last night should not be taken literally. My actions were out of frustration during the heat of the game, period. --"The words expressed do NOT reflect my feelings towards the gay and lesbian communities and were NOT meant to offend anyone." (--Why won't anybody just say "I'm sorry" anymore?) --But NBA Commissioner DAVID STERN fined him anyway, saying, quote, "Kobe Bryant's comment during last night's game was offensive and inexcusable. --"While I'm fully aware that basketball is an emotional game, such a distasteful term should never be tolerated." --Kobe later said he hoped to meet with gay groups in order to, quote, "turn [the situation] into a positive and raise as much awareness as we can." --He added, quote, "The concern that I have is for those that follow what I say . . . look to me as a role model . . . for them not to take what was said as a message of hate or a license to degrade . . . or to embarrass or tease. --"Because that's something I don't wanna see have happen." --As for his fine, Kobe said, quote, "You gotta own up and just take responsibility for what it is. I'm not gonna sit here and say it's not warranted . . . it's a judgment call that they decided to make and I'll abide by it." --But then he turned right around and said he's APPEALING the fine . . . as a matter of, quote, "typical protocol." (--Here's audio.)


Check Out Video of LeBron James' Drunk Mom Hitting That Valet . . . And Then Hitting the Pavement:

Video surfaced yesterday of LEBRON JAMES' drunk mom Gloria slapping that valet in Miami a week ago . . . and then hitting the pavement. (--Check it out here.) --The valet's name is Rockfeller Sorel, and now he's SUING Gloria for battery. And he claims that she hurled the N-WORD at him during her tirade. --His attorney says she told him, quote, "You don't know who I am, you (effin') (N-word). Tomorrow, you won't have a job." --What's interesting about the video, though, is that it actually looks like Sorel might be ADVANCING on Gloria . . . both before and after she slaps him.--In fact, when she falls, she seems to be retreating from him. Of course, there's no way to tell what happened with much certainty from this clip. --This doesn't prove anyone's guilt or innocence, but Gloria was arrested . . . while Sorel was not.


LeBron James' Jersey Is Now More Popular Than Kobe Bryant's:

KOBE BRYANT and LEBRON JAMES may each be embroiled in their own controversies right now, but it hasn't affected their popularity yet. They still have the two most popular NBA jerseys on the market. --But they've switched spots since the beginning of the season. Kobe's Lakers jersey used to be the top seller . . . but LeBron's #6 Miami Heat jersey just overtook it.

--Here are the most popular NBA jerseys . . .

#1.) LeBron James, Miami Heat

#2.) Kobe Bryant, Los Angeles Lakers

#3.) Rajon Rondo, Boston Celtics

#4.) Amar'e Stoudemire, New York Knicks

#5.) Derrick Rose, Chicago Bulls

#6.) Dwayne Wade, Miami Heat

#7.) Kevin Durant, Oklahoma City Thunder

#8.) Carmelo Anthony, New York Knicks

#9.) Dwight Howard, Orlando Magic

#10.) John Wall, Washington Wizards


Barry Bonds Is Guilty . . . Of Obstruction of Justice:

BARRY BONDS was found guilty yesterday of OBSTRUCTION OF JUSTICE. --But the jury failed to reach a decision on three perjury charges. There's no word yet if or when he'll be retried on those counts. --Barry is accused of lying to a federal grand jury years ago when he testified that he never knowingly took performance-enhancing drugs. --Barry COULD receive up to 10 years in federal prison on the obstruction charge alone. But federal sentencing guidelines only recommend 15 to 21 months. --And there's actually talk that he could serve whatever sentence he gets in home confinement. --After the verdict, Bonds' attorney refused to claim victory . . . but he did note that the feds failed to convict Barry on the most important charges. --He said, quote, "Counts one, two and three were the heart of their case. Those were the counts which had allegations about steroids, allegations about human growth hormone and so forth. We have no verdict on those counts." (--You can watch video of the attorney's press conference here. But be warned: It's seven minutes long, and Barry never takes the microphone.)


Pro Wrestling Legend Mick Foley Will Mow Your Lawn . . . If You Donate $5,000 to the Rape, Abuse, & Incest National Network:

One of pro rassling's most hardcore bad-asses, MICK FOLEY, will mow your lawn. It doesn't matter where you live or how much lawn you've got. There's just one condition: --You have to donate $5,000 to the Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network. --But don't worry . . . just like in his rasslin' days, Mick Foley is a guy who always comes through. On Tuesday, TMZ caught him mowing a lawn in Baltimore . . . with one of those old-school, non-power mowers. (--Check it out here.) (--And here's where you can donate . . . and watch a personal message from Mick.) (--Note to Disc Jedis: Why not get Mick to mow a lawn in YOUR town?) --RAINN was co-founded by singer TORI AMOS almost 20 years ago . . . and that's how Mick got involved with it.
--Mick . . . who has also fought under the names Cactus Jack, Mankind and Dude Love . . . is responsible for some of the craziest, most violent matches in wrestling history. His list of injuries is LEGENDARY.--But before going to the ring to create UTTER CHAOS, he used to psych himself up by listening to Tori's song "Winter" . . . which has got to be one of the most beautiful, peaceful and thoughtful songs EVER WRITTEN. (--Yes, I know: Point debatable.) --It was after meeting Tori in person a few years ago that Mick became a huge RAINN supporter. (--You can read all about Mick's relationship with "Winter", Tori and RAINN here.)


Somebody's Trying to Raise Money Online to Send M. Night Shyamalan Back to Film School:

Some people who think the quality of M. NIGHT SHYAMALAN'S movies has gone seriously downhill are trying to raise money online to send him back to film school at NYU. --They hope to raise $150,000. They're currently up to $411.68. (???)
(--Here's the website where you can donate.)


Mickey Rourke Says His Latest Movie is "Terrible":

Somebody doesn't think you should see MICKEY ROURKE'S new movie, "Passion Play". And that someone is . . . Mickey Rourke. --Mickey was recently asked about the movie . . . which co-stars MEGAN FOX and BILL MURRAY . . . and he said, quote, "Terrible. Another terrible movie. --"But you know, in your career and all the movies you make, you're going to make dozens of terrible ones." (--"Passion Play" opens in limited release on May 6th, then hits DVD on the 31st.)



Ashley Kauffman Is Not Backing Off Her Weight Discrimination Accusation Against "American Idol":

19-year-old ASHLEY KAUFFMAN was on "Good Morning America" yesterday . . . and she's not backing off her claim that she wasn't allowed a front seat at "American Idol" because of her weight. --Ashley says that her initial comments . . . that she was sent to the "back row" because she was "just too big, too heavy to be in front" with her skinny friends . . . were slightly misconstrued. --She wasn't sent to the back row of the studio, she was sent to the, quote, "back row of that section." And Ashley wasn't banished to the back row alone . . . two of her five other friends were apparently also deemed unsuitable for the front. (--An "Idol" higher-up has said that Ashley and her other two friends still had floor tickets, four rows behind her other three friends, and that the group had agreed to be split up.) --So it all boils down to this: Whether or not Ashley and her friends agreed to be broken up, Ashley claims she was not given the opportunity to sit in the front, because she was, quote, "too big and too heavy." A female staffer told her that. --Ashley explains, quote, "The look on her face was just as if I was disgusting . . . I know I'm heavier than some of the girls I was with . . . but I didn't think I was disgusting looking." --And she reiterates that a second staffer, a male usher, later told her, quote, "Oh, it makes sense why you're not with the skinny girls . . . you guys are in the back row." --Ashley said all she wants is an apology, and hopes that this doesn't happen to anybody else. (--You can watch video of the interview, here.)


Simon Cowell Is Banking More Than $208,000 . . . a Day:

SIMON COWELL is raking in money at an ASTONISHING rate. According to, Simon is banking more than $208,000 . . . A DAY. --It's unclear how they arrived at that number, but they say he made $52.7 million during a nine-month span in 2009. (--That works out to $208,000-a-day, roughly.) --Not that any of this is surprising. In addition to his tenure on "American Idol", Simon created the shows "X Factor", "Britain's Got Talent" and "America's Got Talent". Plus, he has a TV production company and a music publishing company. --And his departure from "Idol" shouldn't hurt his income . . . no matter how much money he turned down . . . because he moved on to launch the American "X Factor", which should bring him exponentially more money because it's his own show. --Simon is reportedly worth over $266 million . . . and is projected to become a BILLIONAIRE within six years. (--So . . . how about that economy???)


Rihanna Would've Loved to Judge "X Factor", If It Weren't for Her Career:

On RYAN SEACREST'S radio show yesterday, RIHANNA confirmed that she entertained an invitation to be a judge on "X Factor" . . . but ultimately had to turn it down because, you know, she's an international superstar. --She said, quote, "It's something that I would have loved to do, actually. But it's a demanding schedule to be on that show. You have to be around months at a time, which is impossible for me."


One Hollywood Writer Compares "Glee" to a "Puddle of HIV":

Writer BRET EASTON ELLIS . . . who wrote "Less Than Zero", "The Rules of Attraction" and "American Psycho" . . . has had some bizarre, controversial things to say about "Glee" on Twitter. (--Careful.)
--On Tuesday, Bret said, quote, "I like the idea of 'Glee', but why is it that every time I watch an episode I feel like I've stepped into a puddle of HIV?" --And late last night, he added, quote, "No, I wasn't drunk last night. I was watching Chris Colfer singing, um, "Le Jazz Hot" and felt like I had suddenly come down with the HIVs." (???) (--Some are saying he's being HOMOPHOBIC, and that's possible . . . but honestly, I have NO IDEA what he's trying to say, so I can't comment beyond saying it sounds BAD. His Twitter is @BretEastonEllis. Maybe he'll elaborate.)


Someone Put a "Walking Dead" Advertisement Next to a Funeral Home:

Someone in the U.K. found an advertisement for AMC's "Walking Dead" show . . . essentially posted to the side of a funeral home. Obviously, the people who were going to make funeral arrangements for their loved ones were NOT amused. (--Clear Channel put up the ad. They apologized for the "unfortunate juxtaposition," and said it was "certainly not intended." It's been removed . . . but you can see a picture, here.)


Matt Lauer and Katie Couric Joked About the Rumors Going Around During Their Reunion on the "Today" Show:

KATIE COURIC took her I Have No Idea What I'm Doing Tour to the eye of the storm yesterday, when she reunited with MATT LAUER on the "Today" show. (--The entertainment media has been speculating that Katie and Matt could both leave their current programs to re-team on a syndicated daytime talk show. But for now, that's all still baseless speculation.) --But despite the compelling forum, nothing all that intriguing came out of it. Katie continued to say she's still "figuring out" what she's going to do next, and Matt didn't directly address any of the rumors involving him. --They did poke some fun at the whole thing, though. --Matt joked, quote, "Heard any good rumors lately?" And Katie responded, quote, "No, have you?" And they both laughed and laughed. Good times. -Katie also apologized for taking the media focus away from where it belongs . . . quote, "I need to give the headlines back to Charlie
Sheen]. I feel bad about that." --If nothing else . . . Katie did drop this note: She says she hopes to announce something, quote, "in the next few weeks." (--Here's video of the interview.)


Thursday TV Reminders: (--Check your local listings.)

--"American Idol" [Results Show] . . . 8:00 to 9:00 P.M. on Fox. (--Rihanna performs, plus Kelly Clarkson and country singer Jason Aldean will do their duet "Don't You Wanna Stay".)


--"The Paul Reiser Show" [SERIES Premiere] . . . 8:30 to 9:00 P.M. on NBC. (--A sitcom starring Paul Reiser as himself. In the first episode he auditions for a game show produced by Mark Burnett, and finds out that his competition is Larry David from "Curb Your Enthusiasm".)


--"The Office" . . . 9:00 to 9:30 P.M. on NBC. (--Will Ferrell guest stars in his first of four appearances, as the guy who Kathy Bates hires to replace Steve Carell's character Michael Scott.)


--"Randy Jackson Presents: America's Best Dance Crew" [6th Season Premiere] . . . 10:00 to 11:00 P.M. on MTV. (--Ke$ha assigns songs to each dance team, who will then have to choreograph their routines to it.)


--"John Oliver's New York Stand-Up Show" . . . Midnight to 1:00 A.M. on Comedy Central. (--Comedians Mike Lawrence, Marina Franklin, Brendon Walsh and Greg Behrendt perform.)


Lady Gaga Says She's Never Had Plastic Surgery:

If you're one of those people who say that LADY GAGA just does everything MADONNA did, 20 years later . . . that would mean that Gaga has scheduled a procedure to have really bad plastic surgery in 2029. --But that WON'T be happening . . . or at least that's what Gaga is saying now. --She tells "Harper's Bazaar", quote, "I have never had plastic surgery, and there are many pop singers who have. I think that promoting insecurity in the form of plastic surgery is infinitely more harmful than an artistic expression related to body modification." --Some of those "body modifications" would be the bone-like protrusions Lady Gaga has sculpted into her face, forehead and shoulders . . . using make-up and who-knows-what-else. (--She's been sporting them for a while now. Here's a picture.) --She "explains" that look by saying, quote, "I am an artist . . . and I have the ability and the free will to choose the way the world will envision me."


The Billboard Music Award Nominees Have Been Announced:

The nominees for this year's Billboard Music Awards were announced yesterday . . . and RIHANNA led everyone with 18 nominations. LADY GAGA was next with 12, and BRUNO MARS and JUSTIN BIEBER followed with 11. --For the first time in five years, the awards will be handed out during a televised ceremony. It'll air May 22nd on ABC. Performers include: Rihanna, Jennifer Lopez, Lady Antebellum, the Black Eyed Peas and Keith Urban. --The winners will be determined by album, single and digital sales . . . touring, streaming, and social interactions on sites like MySpace and Facebook. (--You can browse a complete list of nominees at


A Former 98 Degrees Singer Has Joined Vegas' Chippendales Show:

Former 98 DEGREES singer JEFF TIMMONS has joined Las Vegas' Chippendales show. (--Of course, Chippendales is the famous erotic male dance show, where the guys wear bowties . . . and not much else.) --Jeff, who's turning 38 later this month, will serve as "the special musical guest star and emcee." He'll do four weeks . . . from May 12th through June 5th


25 Things You Don't Know About Dave Grohl of the Foo Fighters:

"Us" magazine's latest "25 Things You Don't Know About Me" feature serves up some interesting facts about FOO FIGHTERS singer DAVE GROHL.

--Here are the highlights . . .


--"I still listen to Ace of Base."


--"My entire life, I've had the same recurring dream about a house I've never been to."


--"I never took lessons to play the drums. I learned to play on pillows in my bedroom."


--"My parents almost named me Hans. So my nickname as a child was 'Hans Grohlo.' (It was the '70s.)"


--"I believe in UFOs."


--"I love assembling Ikea furniture."


--"I am really, really, really good at Whack-a-Mole."


--"I used to wear long johns under my jeans because I thought I was too skinny. (Not a problem anymore.)"

(--You can check out Dave's complete list, here.)


Music-Related Videos: Miley Cyrus, Joan Jett, Pat Benatar, Avril Lavigne, Stevie Nicks, Sheryl Crow, Shakira:

#1.) MILEY CYRUS and JOAN JETT performed together on "The Oprah Winfrey Show" yesterday. They did a medley of Joan's hits: "Bad Reputation", "Cherry Bomb" and "I Hate Myself". (Video) (--As you'll notice, Oprah gave Miley one of her infamously loud, warbling introductions . . . but Joan didn't get one. It's sort of sad . . . I know it really would've meant a lot to her. Oh well, at least Joan got introduced FIRST.)


#2.) PAT BENATAR and AVRIL LAVIGNE also teamed up on "Oprah". They did Pat's hit "Love Is a Battlefield". (Video) (--Pat's husband Neil Giraldo got Oprah's warbling introduction!)


#3.) Finally, STEVIE NICKS sang "Landslide" for OPRAH, with some help from SHERYL CROW. (Video) (--In exchange, Stevie got a warbling welcome!)


#4.) SHAKIRA apparently had a ring stolen OFF HER HAND while performing in Mexico last week. And amazingly, there's VIDEO. You can see the fan slip the ring off as she walked through the crowd. Shakira noticed it, but kept going. (Video)


#5.) JUSTIN BIEBER supposedly ran over a photographer's foot with a moped earlier this week. The dude was paparazzi . . . and totally had it coming to him. (Video)


Adele Knocked Britney Spears Off the Top of the Albums Chart:

ADELE sold another 88,000 copies of "21"
this week, knocking BRITNEY SPEARS out of the top spot on the "Billboard" chart. That also pushes the total sales of "21" past the million mark . . . it's now sold 1.03 million copies since its debut on February 22nd.


1.) "21", Adele (88,000 copies)

2.) "Femme Fatale", Britney Spears (75,000 copies)

3.) "The King of Limbs", Radiohead (67,000 copies)

4.) (NEW) "American Tragedy", Hollywood Undead (66,000 copies)

5.) "Rolling Papers", Wiz Khalifa (59,000 copies)



Showbiz Extras . . . Random Links to Additional Stories:


SEANN WILLIAM SCOTT is out of rehab. Although we still don't know what he went in there for in the first place. (Full Story)


Drug paraphernalia charges against MONTEL WILLIAMS were dropped because the pipe that was confiscated from him at the Milwaukee airport tested NEGATIVE for marijuana. Montel shamelessly partakes of the Giggle Weed to ease the symptoms of his multiple sclerosis. (Full Story)


CHARLIE SHEEN claims that it's 85% likely he'll return to "Two and a Half Men". (Video)


JUSTIN BIEBER was commenting on TILA TEQUILA'S YouTube videos when he was just 13 years old. (Full Story)


A recent poll showed DONALD TRUMP tied with MIKE HUCKABEE atop the field of prospective Republican presidential nominees. But another poll shows that more than four in 10 Republicans don't want him to run. (Full Story)


SALLY FIELD will play Mary Todd Lincoln in STEVEN SPIELBERG'S Abraham Lincoln movie. DANIEL DAY-LEWIS is playing Lincoln. (Full Story)


If you're bummed out because all the pictures we've seen of NBC's new "Wonder Woman" so far show her in LONG PANTS, don't despair. Star Adrianne Palicki will wear three different costumes . . . and one of them includes the BOOTY SHORTS. (Full Story)


JESSICA LANGE has joined the cast of the FX pilot "American Horror Story". It's a thriller-type series being developed by "Glee" creator RYAN MURPHY. (Full Story)




The Average American Works Eight-and-a-Half Hours a Day, and Eats All Their Meals in 74 Minutes:


The Organization for Economic Cooperation and Development just put out a report on work hours in 29 major countries. The two big takeaways are that Americans work too much . . . and the old "lazy Mexican" stereotype needs to go. --The average American works eight-and-a-half hours per day, between paid and unpaid work. The split is about five hours paid, plus three-and-a-half hours of unpaid work, like daily chores. --And that's a lot . . . but nowhere close to the people of MEXICO. They work an average of TEN hours a day, which is the most of any country in the study. --The countries that work the most, in order, are Mexico, Japan, Portugal, Canada, Estonia, Austria, China, New Zealand, then the U.S. --So who should inherit the "lazy" stereotype? BELGIANS. The people of Belgium work just over seven hours a day on average. --They just beat out Denmark, Germany, South Africa, and France as the laziest countries. --The study also found that the average American spends only 30 minutes in the kitchen every day, which is the lowest of any country. We also spend the third-least time eating, at 74 minutes . . . but we were the chubbiest country in the study. --We also led all of the countries in the survey in volunteering, donating money, and helping strangers. An average of 60% of Americans do one of those per month . . . the worldwide average is 39%. (OECD)



Another Kid At a Chain Restaurant Was Accidentally Served Alcohol . . . This Time It Was Sangria at an Olive Garden:


Earlier this week, a huge story broke about a 15-month-old at Applebee's who was accidentally given a MARGARITA instead of apple juice in his sippy cup. --And now, ANOTHER story has broken about a child at a chain restaurant getting served alcohol. --In Lakeland, Florida, a two-and-a-half-year-old was served SANGRIA in his plastic cup at an Olive Garden. --The boy's name is Nikolai. He was with his mother, Jill Van Heest, and asked for an orange juice. The server brought him a child's plastic cup, and Nikolai drank most of it. Then the server came back and took it away. --Jill says the server told her, quote, "'There's been a mistake, I need to get you a new one' . . . and [then he] took the glass and kind of scurried away." --When he brought back a new drink, Jill asked him what was in the old one and he admitted it was Tropical Sangria . . . which Olive Garden makes out of orange juice, pineapple juice, and wine. He apologized profusely, as did the manager. --Meanwhile, Nikolai started getting visibly drunk, so Jill took him to the hospital. Doctors gave him an I.V. . . . and within a couple of hours he was fine. The hospital hasn't released his blood-alcohol level. --Olive Garden says they're investigating how it happened. Jill says she's contacted an attorney, but so far, there's no lawsuit on the table. (FOX 35 - Orlando)



The TSA Gave a Pat Down to a Six-Year-Old Girl:


It feels like it's been at LEAST a few months since we were outraged at the TSA. But there's a new video online that's putting an end to THAT streak. --The video is from the New Orleans International Airport, and it shows a TSA agent giving a full pat down to a SIX-YEAR-OLD GIRL. --I mean . . . it's a female agent doing the pat down, and while she does everything she can to keep it professional, the way she's touching the girl would get her ARRESTED in any other context. --Plus, the little girl makes it clear at the beginning that she doesn't want to participate. --The girl's parents are Todd and Selena Drexel of Bowling Green, Kentucky. --Selena says, quote, "I did ask for alternatives, I asked for her to be rescanned. They just refused and said they were going to do what they were going to do." --Todd says that while his daughter took the pat down like a champ, she started crying afterward. Quote, "She really didn't understand what she had done wrong." --The TSA issued a statement saying they reviewed the footage and, quote, "the officer followed proper current screening procedures." (ABC News) (--Here's the YouTube video. And while it's obviously crazy to pat down a six-year-old like this . . . don't think the terrorists would hesitate to plant a bomb on a child.)



A Real Estate Agent is Trying To Help Sales By Using Property Photos With Hot Models:


If you're willing to drop $2.5 MILLION on a two-bedroom apartment, it BETTER be because you think it'll make attractive women more likely to have sex with you. --And that's exactly the mindset that a real estate broker in New York City is betting on. --His name is Dimitrios Aletras and he's a part of the Nest Seekers real estate agency. His newest strategy for moving real estate is to use photos of the properties featuring HOT MODELS. --Dimitrios says he got the idea when he was flipping through high-end fashion magazines and realized every ad uses a model. Quote, "I would look at those ads and think, 'Why can't it be this way for real estate, too?'" --So he started hiring models and superstar photographers to juice up his listings. --So far, he's done two of these shoots in Manhattan . . . one for a $2.5 MILLION two-bedroom, two-bathroom apartment, and one for a $4 MILLION duplex. For what it's worth, neither one has sold yet. --If you're thinking about doing this to pump up your listing, Dimitrios says, quote, "To keep costs down, find an up-and-coming photographer, models, and a make-up person. [And] make sure you work with good lighting." (AOL Real Estate)


More Than Half of Single Men are Secretly Using Viagra?


When the hell did American men lose faith in the reliability of their genitalia? --According to a new survey, more than HALF of single men in the U.S. say they've taken Viagra without having a prescription. That's right: More than half are taking black market Viagra. --And 80% said that when they do take Viagra, they keep it a secret from the women they're having relations with. --The team that led the study says, quote, "When sex is just sex and unrelated to a deeper emotional involvement, the situation becomes rife with competitiveness and performance anxiety. [Viagra] lessens that fear." (PR Newswire)



A Politician is Caught Stealing 200 Rolls of Toilet Paper From the Town Hall:


Cue up every single one of your "politicians need toilet paper because they're so full of crap" puns, 'cause you're gonna need them. --In Stralsund, Germany, toilet paper started disappearing from the town hall. Like, 200 rolls of toilet paper. The janitors were suspicious that a 24-year-old, far-left politician named Frank-Michael John was STEALING the toilet paper. -So the janitors set a trap. When they saw John walk into the bathroom, they waited outside . . . and when he came out they cornered him with a roll in his hand. Charges are still pending. (AFP)



Technology is Taking Away Your Ability To Steal Towels and Sheets From Hotels:


Yeah, this is poetic justice . . . but I still don't like it. Modern technology is quickly stealing your ability to steal hotel towels . . . which is supposed to be a God-given right. --The days of being able to walk into a hotel room and treat it as your personal buffet of take-home towels, sheets, and bathrobes is coming to an end, and it's all because of new technological advances. --Hotels are now able to purchase incredibly cheap, washable RFID chips that they can implant in their towels, sheets, bathrobes, and other linens. --So if one gets stolen, they can track its every move. They can also link up your linens to your credit card . . . so if something gets stolen, they can charge you automatically. --So far, there are only three hotels using these chips. The company that makes the chips wouldn't give their names to protect their privacy, but did say they're in Honolulu, Miami, and Manhattan. --A spokesman from the company said that when the Honolulu property put the chips in their towels, the number of thefts went down from 4,000 a month to 750 . . . and saved the hotel more than $16,000 every month. (New York Times)



Website of the Day: "That Can Be My Next Tweet" Scans Your Tweeting History To Automatically Generate a Message:


We've been playing with this website today and it's FAR more entertaining than it should be. --It's called That Can Be My Next Tweet, and it's simple: You enter your Twitter username or someone else's . . . it searches that account's tweeting history . . . and automatically generates a tweet based on the words that come up most often. --The tweets are almost always complete gibberish. We tested @WholeFoods and the tweet came out, quote, "Unfortunately we were there. Did you can find a store to store. Is it away . . . THANKS!" But, that's the fun. --The best part is to see what words you, celebrities, and brands use over and over . . . and just how inane they sound strung together. --The worst part? The URL is INCREDIBLY cumbersome:





A Woman Kills and Mutilates Her Cat Because She Wanted the Blood . . . For Part of a Costume To Wear To a Lady Gaga Concert:


I understand that when you go to a LADY GAGA concert and want to have the CRAZIEST COSTUME, it takes EXTREME measures to make that happen. But this is just HORRIBLE. --Last week, 20-year-old Angelina Barnes of Oklahoma City, Oklahoma was planning to attend the Lady Gaga concert in Tulsa and wanted to have a hell of a costume. --It included dying her hair purple, wearing a long coat, and smearing her face with blood. And to get that blood . . . she decided to MURDER HER CAT.--A relative came over to her house and found Barnes in the bathroom with the mutilated cat at her feet. Barnes had drowned the cat and then gutted it. The cat's liver was in her makeup bag.--The relative called the police. --Barnes was taken to the hospital, where she threatened a male nurse with a piece of glass. --She's been charged with animal cruelty and is undergoing a psych evaluation. She's still at the hospital. And yes, she missed the concert. (NBC 4 - Oklahoma City)


Police Catch a Bank Robber When the Dye Pack Explodes In His Pants:


On Tuesday, a guy whose name wasn't released robbed a Bank of America in Winter Park, Florida. But the teller who gave him the money slipped an exploding dye pack into the bag. --When the man left the bank, he found the dye pack, carefully took it out, and put it in his pocket. But as he ran away, the pack exploded IN HIS PANTS. --The explosion left a huge dye stain all over his pants . . . and was FORCEFUL enough to INJURE the guy. He limped into an Italian restaurant to try to recover . . . and they called the police. --The robber limped out and the police tracked him down in front of a place called Jumbo Chinese Restaurant. He was arrested. (Orlando Sentinel)



What Are You Going To Do With Your Tax Refund?



With little just a few days are left to file taxes, and the average expected return around $3,000, many consumers are still torn on how they'll use their refunds. A new survey from Experian revealed that while the majority of Americans plan to save at least half of their refund, nearly one in three intend to blow it all. With the average consumer owing more than $4,000 in bankcard debt at the end of December, larger sums of money, such as tax refunds, are a great opportunity for consumers to make significant progress toward achieving their financial goals, which can include paying off credit card debt or buying a home. Other highlights:



•Of the portion of their refunds that Americans plan to save, 52% are planning to build up their savings. Aother 16% will take a vacation.


•A few Americans are making sensible spending decisions. Of the 51% who plan on spending a portion of their tax refund, 32% will pay living expenses and 19% will pay down credit card debt.







For Quick Links to Outside Sources, Here are Today's Stupid News Extras:



When it comes to the Civil War, 23% of Americans sympathize MORE with the Confederacy. In the South, it's 38%. (Full Story)



Doctors don't take their own advice: A new study shows that they're more likely to give their patients medications that have high rates of side effects and lower mortality rates . . . while they choose the medicine with lower side effects and higher mortality rates for themselves. (Full Story)



More and more doctors are having patients sign non-disclosure agreements . . . promising they won't post bad comments about them on rate-your-physician sites. (Full Story)



Check out a list of the countries with the most billionaires. The U.S. is first, and China's in second, with a 140% increase since last year. The rest of the list goes: Russia, India, Germany, the U.K., Hong Kong, Switzerland, Japan, and Canada.

(--Yeah, Hong Kong is sorta-kinda part of China, but it's complicated.) (Full Story)



If Barbie was six feet tall, her measurements would be 39-18-33. And someone built a life-sized version for a conference on eating disorders. (Full Story)



According to a new study from the Kent State University's Department of Psychology, losing weight helps improve your memory. (Full Story)





#1.) Joe Biden Fell Asleep During Obama's Speech on the National Debt:


President Obama gave a speech about the national debt at George Washington University in D.C. yesterday . . . and Vice President Joe Biden nodded off in the middle of it. --Apparently Biden wasn't the only one who was bored, because in the video, a woman sitting behind him also has trouble staying awake. (--Search for "Obama Puts Biden to Sleep With Budget Speech.")



#2.) A Congressman Showed Off His Auctioneer Skills by Rattling Off the National Debt Figures:


Republican Congressman BILLY LONG owns an auction house in Missouri, and yesterday he used his auctioneer skills to rattle off the national debt figures on the House floor. He ended by saying, "SOLD, at 14 trillion." (--Search for "Congressman Shows Off Auctioneer Skills." He switches to his auctioneer voice at :25.)


#3.) There's a Golf Course in Australia With 30 Sharks in One of the Water Hazards:


Imagine hitting your golf ball into a water hazard, walking to the edge of the water, and seeing a ten-foot SHARK swimming around. Well, it's possible at the Carbrook Golf Club in Queensland, Australia, which features a lake filled with 30 bull sharks. --Club officials think the sharks washed into the lake during a flood in the early '90s, and there's a video on YouTube of one shark swimming right up to the edge of the shore. (--Search for "Carbrook Golf Club Shark in the Lake.")



#4.) A Guy Crashed His Motocross Bike . . . And Ended Up With a Stick Impaled In His Cheek:


There's a video on YouTube called "My Injury / Facial Impalement", and if you have a weak stomach, don't look it up. --It shows a guy crash his motocross bike on the side of a dirt road. Then when he takes his helmet cam off, you can see a stick impaled in his left cheek. --What's weird about it is, he was more worried about his injured hand, and somewhat calm about the stick . . . probably because he couldn't see how gruesome it looked. (--It shows the impalement at :57.)
(--WARNING: This video shows graphic footage of a small tree branch sticking out of a guy's cheek.)



Three Types of Friends Who Can Derail Your Diet:


Your friends can be a big help when you're trying to lose weight: They can work out with you, give you advice, and offer you encouragement. But some friends can actually PREVENT you from losing weight, and you might not even realize it --Here are three types of friends who can derail your diet.


#1.) The Friend Who Doesn't Like To See You Struggle. If your friend tells you that you seem miserable, or asks if you're sure it's really worth it, it might seem like they're trying to help. --But they're not exactly being supportive. And THEY might not realize it either, but they're actually encouraging you to keep being unhealthy.


#2.) The Friend Who Encourages You to Cheat. If they say something like, "You're doing so well, you deserve that slice of pizza", they're making the diet even harder on you, and encouraging you to fall off the wagon.


#3.) Your Food Buddy. If you used to go out to dinner together, or eat junk food in front of the TV, your friend might be worried that you'll start criticizing THEIR eating habits. Or, that your friendship might not survive your new lifestyle. --There's also a chance they'll just be jealous. And any of those three things can lead them to sabotage your diet, even if they don't do it on purpose. (


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