Monday, April 18, 2011




Nicolas Cage Was Arrested In New Orleans . . . And Bailed Out By Dog The Bounty Hunter:


NICOLAS CAGE was arrested Saturday morning in New Orleans, after a public altercation with his wife, ALICE KIM. --It all went down at about 6:30 in the morning, in the French Quarter. Police say Nic and Alice were standing in front of a residence that he insisted was their rented apartment. She disagreed. --The police report states, quote, "Cage grabbed her by the upper arm and pulled her to what he believed was the correct address. There were no visible signs of injury on his wife's arm. --"The actor then began striking vehicles and later attempted to get into a taxi. At that point, an officer who had been flagged down by onlookers drove up on the couple, immediately observed that Cage was heavily intoxicated and ordered him out of the cab, which prompted Cage to start yelling. --"The officers subsequently took Cage to Central Lock-up." --TMZ says Cage actually DARED the cops to bust him, saying, quote, "Why don't you just arrest me?" --Cage was booked on suspicion of domestic battery and disturbing the peace. Alice did NOT want charges filed against him, so it's not likely she's going to cooperate with prosecutors . . . if this thing ever gets to that point. --It was DOG THE BOUNTY HUNTER who paid the $11,000 bond to spring Cage. He's due back in court on May 31st. --Dog released a rather lengthy statement to the media explaining why he won't talk to the media about Cage's arrest. (--Irony alert.) -Here's part of it . . . quote, "I am a truly dedicated fan of Mr. Cage and will not be granting any interviews about my client as I wish to respect his privacy. I performed my duties as a bail bondsman and not in connection with our show.
--"This is what I do for a living. There are two sides of my job: I release my clients after they have been arrested; and pick them up if they don't show up in court. I do not believe the latter will be the case for Mr. Cage."
--Dog's wife Beth says Cage was in custody for about eight hours. --Shortly before his arrest, Cage and his wife were in a tattoo parlor, where witnesses say they were arguing about their address. It was all caught on surveillance video. (--There's no sound, but you can watch the video here.)



Nicolas Cage Also Caused a Disturbance in New Orleans Last Month:


Saturday wasn't the first time this year that NICOLAS CAGE got loaded and created chaos in New Orleans. --In the new issue of "GQ" magazine, editor Jim Nelson tells a tale of Cage making a drunken scene at a restaurant called Stella! last month during Mardi Gras. --The shenanigans included Cage approaching two women at a table, telling one of them, "You're a contender," and the other, "You're not."

--Cage wasn't arrested . . . just escorted out and taken home by police with a warning. But on his way out of the restaurant, he punched his hand through a glass panel in the door. (--You can read all the details here.)



(NC-17) Kim Kardashian Is Obsessed with Having a Hairless Body . . . But She Likes Her Men to Have Hair . . . DOWN THERE:


This is mildly erotic while at the same time borderline annoying: KIM KARDASHIAN is obsessed with having a hairless body. --It's so bad that the she got her first bikini wax at the age of 12 . . . and she's had laser treatment on her legs, arms, underarms, neck and forehead. --She says, quote, "I'm, like, obsessed with hair removal. Literally, at 12 years old I had a bikini wax. I had an appointment once a month on a specific day, like every Friday we'd go and get the inside of our brows waxed and a bikini wax. --"I used to have my own wax kit at home and I used to just wax all the time." --Kim may not like to have her own UPSIDE-DOWN TRIANGLE OF SWEETNESS . . . but she likes her MAN to have one . . . as long as he takes care of it. --She says, quote, "I definitely don't like it if there's, like, nothing there, it's weird. But I like it to be well groomed."



Jerry Seinfeld May Have Offended Some Brits by Calling the Royal Wedding "Absurd" and a "Circus Act":


Even though "People" magazine wants you to think differently, my guess is the vast majority of Americans couldn't give a rip about PRINCE WILLIAM and KATE MIDDLETON'S wedding. --But if you were in England . . . being interviewed on a British TV talk show . . . you probably wouldn't let your true feelings be known. --JERRY SEINFELD did. --On some morning show the other day, Jerry was asked if he was looking forward to the royal wedding. He said, quote, "Yes, I'm very excited. Well it's a circus act, it's an absurd act." --He added, quote, "You know, it's a dress-up. It's a classic English thing of let's play dress-up. Let's pretend that these are special people. OK, we'll all pretend that . . . that's what theater is." --He didn't even stop there. He continued, quote, "That's why the British have the greatest theater in the world. They love to dress up and they love to play pretend. --"And that's what the Royal Family is: it's a huge game of pretend. These aren't special people. It's fake outfits, fake phony hats and gowns." --But then Jerry sensed that he was being insulting, so he pulled back a little bit and said, quote, "It's fantastic. We don't have anything like that." --The interview was actually taped in New York . . . and when cameras cut back to the show's anchors in London, they were not amused. --One of them said, quote, "How dare he!" . . . while the other added, quote, "I'll join in on any of that stuff, if it's a Brit doing it. But I can't bear Americans criticizing the Royal family. It turns me into a Royalist!" --Jerry was on the show hyping a June standup gig in London. It'll be interesting to see if there's any backlash.

Now Donald Trump Says President Obama Didn't Write One of His Books . . . And His Lead in the Polls Continues to Increase:


Americans love a sideshow . . . which must be why DONALD TRUMP'S poll numbers continue to rise. --In a new survey by Public Policy Polling, Trump leads the field of prospective Republican presidential candidates with 26% of the vote. His closest challenger is MIKE HUCKABEE with 17%. --MITT ROMNEY is third with 11%, followed by NEWT GINGRICH with 8% and SARAH PALIN with 5%. --Meanwhile, the media continues to give Trump an open microphone to go after Obama . . . presumably because he's NOT OFFICIALLY A CANDIDATE YET. --Which basically means that Trump is doing what amounts to constant negative campaigning without having to either declare his candidacy OR give up his weekly network series, "Celebrity Apprentice". --Oh, and on top of that, he's actually using his potential candidacy to hype the show. --Last week, he informed us that we should tune in to the season finale of "Celebrity Apprentice", because he's going to announce the date upon which he will announce whether he's going to run. (--God bless America.) --Meanwhile, in his latest love-fest with Fox News, Donald dropped a new conspiracy theory on SEAN HANNITY.
--Trump now believes that left-wing nutjob and onetime Obama ally BILL AYERS wrote Obama's book "Dreams From My Father". And how did Trump figure this out? Because he's written best-sellers before. --Seriously. He said, quote, "You know, I wrote many best sellers, and also, number one bestsellers including 'The Art of the Deal'. So I know something about writing. --"And I want to tell you, the guy that wrote the first book didn't write the second book. Obama made a big mistake when he wrote the second book. Because the second book was not Ernest Hemingway, it was about 37 classes below. --"So, the first book is Ernest Hemingway-plus. The second book was written by somebody that was much more average." (--Yeah, that's pure eloquence from someone who knows about writing. Watch video of this A-hole who's turning our political system into a complete joke, here.)



Is Evan Rachel Wood Bisexual?


Thanks to her on-and-off relationship with MARILYN MANSON, it's probably not that much of a surprise that EVAN RACHEL WOOD appears to be BISEXUAL. --Check out what she says in the new issue of "Esquire" magazine . . . quote, "I was always into very androgynous things. Guys, girls . . . I'm into androgyny in general." --She added that she'll be moving to New York City this fall, and she'll be, quote, "up for anything. Meet a nice guy, meet a nice girl." --She also admitted that when she's with another girl, she's the dude . . . quote, "I'm more of like the guy when it comes to girls. I'm the dominant one. I'm opening the doors, I'm buying dinner. Yeah I'm romantic."



Is Evangeline Lilly Pregnant?


We haven't seen or heard much of EVANGELINE LILLY since "Lost" went off the air. Maybe that's because she's KNOCKED UP. "Us Weekly" has some new pictures of Evangeline, and her pregnancy couldn't be more obvious. (--Check out the pics here.) --Evangeline's boyfriend is Norman Kali . . . who worked as a production assistant on the show. (US Weekly)



Natalie Portman Used a Body Double In "Your Highness" Too . . . But You Still See Her Butt:


NATALIE PORTMAN'S dance double from "Black Swan" is still out there claiming she did most of the work. --And now, there's a chick who claims she was actually the one who jumped in the lake for Natalie in the now-infamous thong scene from the new comedy, "Your Highness". --An Irish film student by the name of Caroline Davis says she was paid about 400 bucks to take the plunge into a freezing lake in Belfast. She says, quote, "I'm a film studies student so I jumped at the chance to be on set." --Now, we should note that you DO see Natalie's real backside in the movie. The first set of cheeks you see when she disrobes are hers. But when she actually dives into the water, that's supposedly Caroline.



The Charlie Sheen Weekend Roundup: Charlie Raised Money for Bipolar Awareness in Toronto . . . And Let Jeffrey Ross Roast Him in Atlantic City:


Here's your CHARLIE SHEEN Live Show Weekend Roundup: --Charlie's second Toronto show went down on Friday. But before it even started, he arranged a Bipolar charity walk from his hotel to the theater . . . which is about 1.2 miles. --He sent out a series of Tweets telling people to join him . . . and asking them to donate to OBAD . . . which is the Organization for Bipolar Affective Disorder. --One of his Tweets said, quote, "Stop the Stigma!! Bipolar Awareness Walk!! Please join me at 6pm at the Ritz tonight! Raise money! Raise Awareness! #BIPOLAR #BIWINNING." --Then at the show, he held a mini-auction for the cause. A signed Toronto Blue Jays jersey sold for $1,000 . . . and one of his warlock T-shirts went for $2,000. --OBAD had no idea Charlie was doing any of this. A representative of the group said, quote, "We didn't know it was coming and we have no idea what to expect. --One other quick note from the show: Charlie said, yet again, that he expects to be back on "Two and a Half Men". He told the crowd, quote, "I'll get that (effin') job back!" --Meanwhile, in Atlantic City on Saturday night, Charlie brought comedian JEFFREY ROSS onstage to ROAST him. Ross is one of the stars of those Comedy Central roasts . . . so he was definitely the right man for the job. --Here were some of his jokes . . . --"Even Bernie Madoff wanted his money back after seeing this (effing) show . . . Let's face it, Charlie Sheen is to stand up as Larry Flynt is to standing up." --"I'm used to roasting classier people like Flavor Flav and Courtney Love." --The crowd was into it at first, but witnesses say people got agitated because Ross seemed to be taking over the show. --When he left the stage, Charlie ended the night with some audience Q&A . . . during which he revealed that the most women he's ever had in a single night was SEVEN.



--Ross was back onstage with Charlie last night during his show in Mashantucket, Connecticut. From all accounts, nothing really remarkable happened there . . . except for the fact that nobody walked out before the show was over.



Brooke Mueller is Back In Rehab:


BROOKE MUELLER is back in rehab. --Brooke apparently fell off the wagon sometime last week. She was spotted trying to sell some personal items at a PAWN SHOP on Thursday. --We'd also heard that she was calling friends of hers asking for CLEAN URINE, so she could pass a random drug test. TMZ says that on Friday, people went to her home to administer the test, and were DENIED by her attorney. --Entering rehab could be seen as a pre-emptive strike against CHARLIE SHEEN'S lawyers. --Those drug tests are part of Brooke and Charlie's custody agreement . . . and refusing to take one is the same as FAILING. And failing could result in Brooke losing custody of their two-year-old twins. --Meanwhile, Charlie had a message for Brooke Friday night. He said, quote, "She knows the rules. And the consequences are radical. Don't pick a (effin') fight with a warlock . . . 'cause you're gonna lose. (--Keep in mind he made these comments before anyone knew Brooke had checked back into rehab. Not that such knowledge would have made him more sensitive to her plight. Watch video here.)



"Scream 4" Only Earned Half As Much As That Animated Bird Movie "Rio":


The animated movie "Rio" just scored the best opening of any movie this year, making an estimated $40 million at the box office.

(--All three of this year's best opening weekends were animated flicks. "Rango" made $38.1 million and "Hop" made $37.5 million.) --Meanwhile, "Scream 4" had a solid opening, but it still only made half of what "Rio" pulled in.



Calm Down People . . . The Monkey From "The Hangover Part 2" Did NOT Get Addicted to Cigarettes:


TODD PHILLIPS . . . the director of "The Hangover Part 2" . . . got animal activists freaking out after claiming that he got that little monkey in the movie addicted to SMOKING. --He told "Total Film" magazine, quote, "I wanted the monkey to smoke so we had to train her to. Now I have PETA after me because the monkey's become addicted to cigarettes. --"She was just shooting Cameron Crowe's movie 'We Bought a Zoo'. And the monkey won't stop smoking." --After suffering the wrath of online animal lovers, Phillips had to admit he was KIDDING. He said, quote, "This was a joke. I make comedies." --He added, quote, "When you are doing press for a film, it tends to get repetitive, lots of the same questions over and over. Sometimes I like to mix it up with the journalists. --"Obviously, the monkey in the film NEVER smoked a single cigarette. Even if I wanted her to smoke it wouldn't be allowed. --"By the way, she also appears to do cocaine in the movie, but I guarantee you that she didn't do that either."



Jacob Lusk Was Arrested Last Year, and Almost Didn't Get the Chance to Compete on "Idol":


"American Idol" finalist JACOB LUSK almost missed the opportunity to do "Idol" because of an arrest last year. Here's what went down . . --According to TMZ, Jacob was caught riding on an L.A. metro train without having bought a ticket in February of 2009. He was cited . . . but then blew off an appearance in court. A warrant was issued for his arrest. --Then in November of last year, just ONE DAY after he auditioned for "Idol", Jacob was pulled over for a traffic violation. The cop discovered the warrant, and arrested him. --Jacob was sentenced to three days in jail, and two years probation. And the thing is, you can't be on "Idol" if you're on probation. --So Jacob went before a judge, and begged to have his probation dropped. And it worked. The judge actually gave him a break . . . and, as I'm sure you know, Jacob is still in the running to be your next American Idol. --By the way, TMZ says that Jacob SANG the whole time he was in jail . . . even though a guard yelled at him to stop. On his last day, he sang a farewell song, and another guard deemed it, quote, "bad ass." --Jacob hasn't commented directly on this, but over the weekend he Tweeted, quote, "I've been through a whole lot more than folks would know in this lifetime . . . BUT GOD has KEPT ME . . . and I am so thankful! Be blessed!"



Paul McDonald Says the Guys "Have an Advantage" on "Idol", Because the Audience is Mostly Teenage Girls:


PAUL MCDONALD, who was sacked from "American Idol" last week, says that guys, quote, "definitely have an advantage" because of all the rabid young girl fans. --He explains, quote, "It's like the teenage girls are the ones who watch the show the most. I remember walking out on stage and I would look around, and people out in the audience have their posters and signs made. --"I was like, 'Oh, there's one poster over there that says Paul.' And then there's like a thousand screaming 14-year-old girls that have Scotty McCreery posters. It's a shame for the girls, because they're so talented. --"I don't know too many guys that watch the show . . . I think it's mostly girls." --Even though Paul was eliminated last week, his theory holds water. We're currently down to the final seven contestants, and only two of them are girls.)



Paul McDonald *Is* Dating Nikki Reed:


PAUL MCDONALD has confirmed that he's dating NIKKI REED, who plays Rosalie Hale in the "Twilight" movies. He said, quote, "It's officially true . . . --"She's super smart and a super cool girl, so I'm happy with it. We've been hanging out here and there. We're both pretty busy, but it's been fun so far." --He added that Nikki is "pumped" that he was eliminated. He said she told him, quote, "Dude, [now] you finally get to do your thing . . . and be the artist you are."



Monday TV Reminders: (--Check your local listings.)


--"NBA Playoffs: Heat vs. 76ers" [Eastern Conference Game 2] . . . 7:00 to 9:30 P.M. Eastern on TNT. (--The Miami Heat host the Philadelphia 76ers.)


--"NBA Playoffs: Bulls vs. Pacers" [Eastern Conference Game 2] . . . 9:30 P.M. to Midnight Eastern on TNT. (--The Chicago Bulls host the Indiana Pacers.)


--"Dancing with the Stars" [Performance Show] . . . 8:00 to 9:30 P.M. on ABC.


--"How I Met Your Mother" . . . 8:00 to 8:30 P.M. on CBS. (--Barney tries to bond with his father, played by John Lithgow.)


--"House" . . . 8:00 to 9:00 P.M. on Fox. (--Thirteen rejoins the team just as Masters might leave to prepare for a surgical career.)


--"Chuck" . . . 8:00 to 9:00 P.M. on NBC. (--Gary Cole guests as Sarah's con artist dad, who she calls after she and Chuck are scammed out of their wedding money.)


--"Hawaii Five-0" . . . 10:00 to 11:00 P.M. on CBS. (--Sean "Diddy" Combs guest stars as an NYPD detective out to avenge his family.)


--"20/20: William & Catherine: A Modern Fairytale" . . . 10:00 to 11:00 P.M. on ABC. (--Barbara Walters previews the April 29th wedding between Prince William and Kate Middleton.)


--"Urban Legends" [3rd Season Premiere] . . . 10:00 to 10:30 P.M. on Syfy.


--"Searching For..." [1st Season Finale] . . . 10:00 to 11:00 P.M. on OWN.


--"Love Games" [2nd Season Premiere] . . . 10:00 to 11:00 P.M. on Oxygen.





Remember Grunge? Quiz: Who Said? - "It's Weird When There's a Kid on the Bill Who Comes Up and Says, 'Your Band Was My First Concert.'"


"It's weird when there's a kid on the bill who comes up and says, 'Your band was my first concert.' You just think, 'Oh no. I'm that guy, now? What am I, (effing) Gandalf?'"


A.) Pearl Jam singer Eddie Vedder


B.) Former Nirvana drummer / Foo Fighters singer Dave Grohl


C.) Soundgarden singer Chris Cornell


D.) Alice in Chains guitarist Jerry Cantrell


E.) Former Screaming Trees singer Mark Lanegan


F.) Melvins singer Buzz Osborne



ANSWER: B.) DAVE GROHL . . . in an interview with "Entertainment Weekly".


--Dave also talked about how he, and former Nirvana members Pat Smear and Krist Novoselic played some old Nirvana songs during a recent jam session. (--Pat, who was a touring musician with Nirvana, now plays guitar for the Foo Fighters . . . and Krist made a guest appearance on their new album, "Wasting Light". He plays bass on "I Should Have Known".

--Dave says they played "Smells Like Teen Spirit" and an old B-side called "Marigold" . . . the only Nirvana song that Dave sang. Dave says, quote, "We ended ['Smells Like Teen Spirit'], and looked at each other like, 'That was strange.'"



The Soundgarden Reunion Was Set in Motion By . . . a Vague Tweet?


SOUNDGARDEN guitarist Kim Thayil says their reunion with singer CHRIS CORNELL was set in motion by . . . a vague Tweet that Chris sent out. --In December of 2009, Chris Tweeted, quote, "The 12-year break is over and school is back in session. Sign up now. Knights of the Soundtable ride again!" Chris was just talking about them finally launching a fan site, but that isn't how fans took it. --Kim says, quote, "I spent a lot of time trying to explain to my friends that we weren't back together. My mother called and said, 'We've heard the news, why didn't you tell us? It generated a lot of interest . . . --"My phone was ringing off the hook with people offering us shows. We thought it would be fun to play that show in Seattle [in April 2010] and eventually Lollapalooza. It was only around then that there was talk about doing some new material."



Duff McKagan Says the Weather in Seattle Has an Actual, Physical Effect on the Music That's Made There:


It was almost 20 years ago, with the rise of Grunge, that people started talking about that "Seattle sound". Now, most people think that sound was simply a product of the writing. --But DUFF MCKAGAN claims it had just as much to do with the local WEATHER. Duff was, of course, the bassist for GUNS N' ROSES and he's currently in VELVET REVOLVER. He also has his own band called LOADED, and they're putting out a new album called "The Taking" tomorrow. --And Duff says it has that Seattle sound, because it was recorded in that notoriously rainy city. --Duff explains, quote, "It's just wet, I think. I'm not kidding . . . I think that has something to do with it. There is an actual sound to Seattle. --"I know from growing up and playing in [Seattle-area] punk bands. Everybody rehearses in the basement wearing coats, so you're bunched up and uncomfortable and it's raining outside and everything is kind of wet. -"I think the paper in the speakers might be a little damp, and the tubes are firing a little differently because there's condensation. I don't think anybody's ever explored that aspect of the Seattle sound, but to me it's always been sort of obvious."



Lady Gaga Released Her "Born This Way" Cover Art, and a New Single:


LADY GAGA has released the cover art for her next album "Born This Way". It features Lady Gaga as a creature that's sort of like a centaur, except that instead of being half-horse, she's half-motorcycle. (--You can check it out, here.) --Lady Gaga also unleashed her new single "Judas". It wasn't supposed to come out until tomorrow, but she put it out on Friday after it had leaked online. (--It's available on iTunes now, or you can check it out, here.)


--The lyrics include the lines:


"When he comes to me I am ready / I'll wash his feet with my hair if he needs

Forgive him when his tongue lies through his brain

Even after three times, he betrays me / I'll bring him down, I came with no crown.


"I wanna love you / But something's pulling me away from you

Jesus is my virtue, Judas is the demon I cling to, I cling to."


--And the chorus goes like this:


"I'm just a holy fool / Oh, baby, he's so cruel

But I'm still in love with Judas, baby."


--There's also a chant similar to the "rah, rah, ah ah ah" one she did in "Bad Romance". This time, she repeats the sounds: "Judahhh, Juda-a-ah . . . Judahhh, Juda-a-ah . . . Judahhh, Juda-a-ah . . . Judahhh, Gaga." (???)



The Top 10 Tracks About the Taxman:


In honor of today being Tax Day, here's a list of The Top 10 Tracks About the Taxman that the people at put together.


--The top spot went to THE BEATLES song "Taxman" from 1966. Here's the list:


, The Beatles (1966)


"Taxman, Mr. Thief"
, Cheap Trick (1977)


, Willie Nelson (2004)


"Inner City Blues (Make Me Wanna Holler)"
, Marvin Gaye (1971)


"1040 Blues"
, Robert Cray (1994)


"Fortunate Son"
, Creedence Clearwater Revival (1969)


, Billy Bragg (1986)


"Me and the IRS"
, Johnny Paycheck (1978)


"Sunny Afternoon"
, The Kinks (1966)


"Success Story"
, The Who (1975)


(--You can find audio and mini write-ups on each song, here.)

New Songs: By Korn, Def Leppard, George Michael and Jimi Hendrix:


#1.) KORN is offering a new song called "Get Up" as a FREE download from their site. It'll be released on a new Korn EP, which is coming out next month. (--You can grab "Get Up", here. WARNING: The chorus contains UNCENSORED PROFANITY.)



#2.) A DEF LEPPARD track called "Undefeated" is now available on iTunes. It's one of three new songs that'll be on their upcoming live album "Mirrorball". The disc comes out on June 7th, exclusively at Walmart and Sam's Club. (--You can listen to "Undefeated", here.)



#3.) GEORGE MICHAEL has recorded a cover of STEVIE WONDER'S
"You and I". And as a gift to EVERYONE . . . in honor of Prince William's wedding . . . he's giving it away for FREE at (--But he wants you to make a donation to the Royal Wedding Charity Fund . . . which distributes money to various charities around the world.)



#4.) A new JIMI HENDRIX song was released on "Record Store Day" on Saturday. It's called "Cat Talking to Me". It was recorded in June of 1967. (--"Cat Talking to Me" is streaming at





Showbiz Extras . . . Random Links to Additional Stories:


This could be truly epic: SAMUEL JACKSON is going to play MARTIN LUTHER KING JR. on Broadway. (Full Story) HALLE BERRY was supposed to be in the play as well, but she's been forced to back out due to her ongoing custody issues. (Full Story)




DEMI MOORE got caught on video Saturday night calling the paparazzi "[Effing A-holes]." (--WARNING!!! The video contains UNBLEEPED PROFANITY.) (Full Story)




MADONNA may have ditched Kabbalah for the Opus Dei . . . a Catholic sect made famous by "The Da Vinci Code". (Full Story)




Here's a picture of a dog who's been fixed, wearing an awesome sign while meeting BOB BARKER. (Photo)




RACHEL BILSON has an enormous dog. (Pictures)




MICKEY ROURKE is sorry that he called his new movie, "Passion Play", terrible. (Full Story)


Showbiz Extras . . . Random Links to Additional Stories:



Pregnant women don't always have the luxury of being able to wait to relieve themselves . . . which is why PENELOPE CRUZ did a lot of peeing in the ocean during the filming of the new "Pirates of the Caribbean" movie. (Full Story)




Former Secretary of State CONDOLEEZZA RICE will guest star on "30 Rock" before the end of the season, as an ex-girlfriend of ALEC BALDWIN'S character. (Full Story)




HBO has picked up a comedy series called "Veep", starring JULIA LOUIS-DREYFUS as the Vice President of the United States. (Full Story)




AMC has a reality show called "The Pitch" coming in 2012 that's described as sort of a real-life "Mad Men". It follows ad agencies as they craft and pitch marketing campaigns to clients. (Full Story)




"Glee" star MATTHEW MORRISON recently returned to his home to find it infested with rats. (Full Story)




MICHAEL STIPE says he was so musically ignorant when he started out that he didn't even know the difference between a bass and a regular guitar until REM was recording its second album. (Full Story)




Everyone's favorite end-of-the-week celebrator REBECCA BLACK isn't just working on a new single . . . she's banging out an EP! (Full Story)




There are Only Two Things People are Reluctant To Share On Facebook . . . Their Sex Lives and Their Salary:


Facebook has made us into a world of OVERSHARERS. In a new survey, an employment website called wanted to see if there's ANYTHING that most people are reluctant to share online--And they found there are only TWO things that we all agree are not for sharing online. Those are . . . details about your SEX LIFE and details about your SALARY. --Only 2% of Americans said they were comfortable sharing either of those. --Nothing else was close . . . although a good number of people also said they were reluctant to share their kid's activities and their household purchases. -The survey also found that 18- to 34-year-olds are most likely to share info about their relationships and jobs . . . women are most likely to share relationship details, vacation photos, and shopping photos . . . and Northeasterners share the least. (Reuters)



Follow-Up: Those People Infected At the Playboy Mansion Got It From the Hot Tub:


Back in February, a few hundred people were infected at a party at the Playboy Mansion. And because this was the 2011 Playboy Mansion and not the 1971 Playboy Mansion . . . it was a respiratory infection, not an STD. --The Los Angeles County Health Department has finally figured out what happened. --The people were infected with a mild form of Legionnaires' Disease, from Legionella bacteria that had found their way into . . . the whirlpool. --So basically, if you went hot tubbin' at the party, you were probably leaving there sick. --Legionella bacteria are known to thrive in moist environments. (--And at the Playboy Mansion these days, the whirlpool is one of the few remaining moist areas.) --The people who got the disease were at the Mansion for a party after a global Internet conference. --Most of them got Pontiac Fever, which is a more mild form of Legionnaires' Disease and usually goes away within five days. The common symptoms are a fever, headache, and cough. (CW 5 - Los Angeles)



Seeing Skinny Models In Magazines Actually Makes Women Feel Better About Their Bodies:


We've always assumed that corporate America makes women feel bad about their bodies by putting an endless stream of impossibly skinny models in magazines and commercials. Well . . . NOPE. --According to a new study out of Ohio State University that contradicts a TON of studies that came before it . . . when women see skinny photos in magazines, it actually gives them a temporary BOOST to their own self-esteem. --The reason is that the women feel temporarily INSPIRED by the photos . . . it gives them hope that they'll be able to attain their dream body one day. It especially happens with women who are dieting at the time. --There's a big downside though: After that glow wears off in a few days, many of the women feel more disappointment than before, because they've set themselves up with unrealistic expectations. (Science Blog)



Screaming Swear Words is Now a Scientifically-Proven Painkiller:


It's a great day for everyone out there who's ever stubbed their toe or bumped their knee . . . then let a bunch of swear words fly no matter how many women, children, nuns, and FCC employees were around. You were on to something. --According to a new study out of Keele University in Staffordshire, England, there's now scientific proof that swearing is actually an effective painkiller. --In the study, people who SWORE after suffering some genuine pain felt 400% less pain than people who kept things G-rated. The researchers believe it happens because swearing gives you an emotional release in the face of stress. (Daily Mail)



More Than Half of American Parents are Still Supporting Their Adult Children:


Remember when it was considered a bad thing to move back in with your folks? According to a new survey, statistically, you're the weird one if you're an adult who ISN'T still sucking money out of your parents. --This is crazy . . . but in a national survey of mothers ages 46 to 65, more than HALF say they're currently supporting their adult children financially. MORE THAN HALF. The MAJORITY of middle-aged parents are still supporting their adult kids. --31% of the mothers surveyed said they're supporting their adult child but expect them to become independent soon. --12% say they're supporting their adult child but aren't sure when they're going to become independent. --And 9% say they're supporting their adult child and expect to keep supporting them INDEFINITELY. --Added up, that's 52% supporting their adult child. --86% of the mothers surveyed said they were independent of their own parents by the time they were 25. (Yahoo News)



The Coffee Chain With the Most Loyal Following is . . . McDonald's?


I know people who get Starbucks every day. I know people who would literally kill a man for the coffee from Dunkin' Donuts. But in a new study, neither of those brands had the most loyal coffee drinkers in the country. --Nope, that title went to . . . MCDONALD'S. --Really. In the study, only 29% of McDonald's coffee customers said they go to Starbucks or Dunkin' Donuts for coffee or breakfast even ONCE a month. --For both Starbucks and Dunkin' Donuts, 53% of their regular customers admit they roam and have coffee or breakfast elsewhere at least once a month. --The firm behind the survey says they believe the biggest reason for McDonald's success is the cost . . . their cheapest coffee is at least 50 cents cheaper than either of the other two places. (Chicago Breaking Business)



The Official Stamp Honoring the Statue of Liberty Shows a Fake Statue of Liberty From a Vegas Casino:


The U.S. Postal Service REALLY can't catch a break: On December 9th last year, they released a new stamp honoring the Statue of Liberty. Now, four months later, a stamp collecting magazine called "Linn's" has filled them in on a little problem with it. --Instead of using a photo of the REAL Statue of Liberty in New York Harbor, the Post Office accidentally used a photo of the FAKE Statue of Liberty outside the 'New York, New York' casino in Las Vegas. --The real Statue of Liberty is a lot bigger, but you can't tell that from the photo they used, since it just shows her head. And the differences you CAN see are small, but legit. --The statue in Vegas has more sharply defined facial features, different hair, and is a different color: The real statue is green because it started out as copper and turned green over time, but the Vegas statue is green because they made it green. --The Postal Service says they selected the photo from a stock photography service and didn't realize that it wasn't the original statue. --Now, as you might've heard, because of email, the Postal Service doesn't have any money any more. They certainly don't have the money to reprint the stamps . . . they already printed THREE BILLION with the Vegas statue. --So . . . they're just going to go with it. A spokesman from the USPS decided to lie and tell us all, quote, "We still love the stamp design and would have selected this photograph anyway." (New York Times) (--Here's a photo of the stamp, and a comparison between the replica and the real Statue of Liberty.)



A Mailman In Oregon Has Been Suspended After He Was Photographed Pooping In Someone's Bushes:


The Postal Service is probably going to have to do a few more rounds of layoffs, so if mail carriers want to keep their jobs, they REALLY shouldn't pull this kind of crap. You're gonna love that amazing pun in a second. --In Portland, Oregon, a mailman has been suspended after he was photographed POOPING in someone's bushes on his route. --Don Derfler of Portland was home, waiting for his babysitter, when he looked out the window and saw the postal worker acting strange in front of a neighbor's house. Don took out his camera just in case. --The mailman squatted near some bushes and just started doing his dirty business, and Don took photos of him in the act. When the postal worker moved on, Don headed over and took photos of the evidence. (--Sounds like Don isn't exactly the most normal guy in the world either.) --He showed the photos to his neighbor . . . the neighbor whose bushes had been befouled . . . and that neighbor called the Postal Service. They suspended the mailman and are determining whether to fire him. --Apparently, just two blocks away there's a public park with a public bathroom that the mailman could've used. (NBC 8 - Portland)



Texans are Driving Down To Mexico Now . . . Because Gas Across the Border is Only $2.80 a Gallon:


Would you risk being kidnapped by a drug lord to save a few bucks on gas? Tons of people in southern Texas say . . . ABSOLUTELY. --According to reports, people in south Texas have been driving across the Mexican border into dangerous border towns because the gas there is around $2.80 a gallon. --And sure, you burn up a lot of gas getting there and waiting in line to get back across the border . . . and yeah, Mexican gas is less clean and leads to more pollution . . . and yes, you might get kidnapped by a drug lord. But cheap gas is cheap gas. (Time)



A Politician in Texas Wants To Make English the Official State Language . . . To Save the Environment?


I think this politician in Texas may have finally found a way to make the state care about the environment . . . by tying environmentalism to keeping my proud Latino brothers down. --Leo Berman is a state representative in Texas. And he's introduced a bill that would make English the official language of Texas. Right now there's no official language so most things are printed in English and Spanish. --So how does that help the environment? Berman says that if English became official, the government could print documents in English only and, quote, "you'll save millions of dollars in printing, ink costs, and time of employees." --The Texas state House of Representatives will probably start discussing the bill in the next few weeks. (ABC 9 - East Texas)



Suck On This, Foreigners: America Has Been Named the Fourth Friendliest Country In the World:


Here's a message to all the other countries out there who say Americans are rude, obnoxious, and xenophobic . . . EFF YOU. We're super, super nice, you a-holes. And we have the data to prove it. --According to a new global survey by HSBC Bank and "Forbes", the U.S. is the FOURTH friendliest country in the world. --The only countries that beat the U.S. were Canada, Bermuda, and South Africa. --The rankings were based on four factors: How easy it is for foreigners to befriend locals . . . success in learning the local language . . . capacity to integrate into the community . . . and the ease of fitting in to the foreign culture. --The full top 10 goes: Canada, Bermuda, South Africa, U.S., Australia, Spain, France, United Kingdom, Malaysia, and Germany. --As for the least-friendly countries . . . of the places included in the study, Qatar got the lowest score. It was just below Saudi Arabia, the United Arab Emirates, Switzerland, and India. (Forbes / HSBC)



A Woman Won't Talk To a Guy At a Bar . . . So He Punches Her In the Face:


Last week, a 21-year-old man was at a bar in Destin, Florida. His name hasn't been released, but it was 2:20 A.M., and he wanted to pick up a woman before the night was over. --So he started trying to talk to a 21-year-old. Her name wasn't released either, but we do know that she wasn't interested and wouldn't talk to him. Which was a great instinct on her part, because the guy turned out to be truly AWFUL. --He was so upset that she was rejecting him that he got belligerent, loud . . . and then PUNCHED the woman in the FACE. He gave her an uppercut that left bruising and swelling on her chin. --The man was arrested and charged with misdemeanor battery. (Destin Log)





Stupid News Extras . . . Random Links to Additional Stories:



The White House has posted a tax calculator that shows exactly how much of your income tax goes to which parts of the Federal Government . . . like 26% to Defense, 24% to health care, etcetera. (Full Story)



You know that 'Culinary Institute' in Italy that Olive Garden brags about in their commercials? It's just a hotel they rent for a week a year, so they can reward managers with a free trip to Italy. (Full Story)



A 12-year-old sixth-grader in Indiana was handcuffed and arrested in the school cafeteria . . . after he refused to clean up his spilled milk. (Full Story)



According to a new study in the hilarious and entertaining journal "Clinical Infectious Diseases", half of all beef in the U.S. contains staph bacteria. It can be killed by cooking the meat, but still. (Full Story)



Remember the woman in Colorado who was playing the game Café World on Facebook while her 13-month-old baby drowned in the bathtub? She's been sentenced to 10 years in prison. (Full Story)



A 62-year-old in Kentucky has invented a car that runs entirely on bourbon. (Full Story)



Police in Houston entered a house on Friday to answer a call about a domestic dispute . . . and got drenched by a bucket of water balanced over the front door. So they called in the bomb squad to search for other "booby traps." They didn't find any. (Full Story)




#1.) A Guy Dressed Up Like Justin Bieber and Stood on the Roof of a Building . . . And Hundreds of Girls Below Started Screaming:


JUSTIN BIEBER played a concert in Zurich, Switzerland earlier this month. And some guy pranked hundreds of girls while they were waiting to get into the venue. --He dressed up like Bieber, stood on the roof of a nearby building, and started waving. And as soon as one girl started screaming, so did the rest. (--Search for "Justin Bieber Fan in Zurich." They really start screaming at :24.)



#2.) A Baseball Groundskeeper Tripped While the Tarp Was Being Rolled Out for a Rain Delay . . . And the 1,500-Pound Tarp Rolled Over Him:


On Friday night, a Kansas City Royals groundskeeper named Trevor Hogan fell while the tarp was being rolled out for a rain delay, and the 1,500-pound tarp rolled right OVER him. --Luckily, he escaped with minor injuries, but he also has a new nickname around the ballpark: "Speed Bump". (--Search for "Guy Falls Under Tarp Being Rolled Out at Royals Game." Things start going wrong at :11.)



#3.) And Now . . . A Baby Penguin Laughing While Being Tickled by a Zookeeper:


If you've ever wondered what a penguin's laugh sounds like, you're in luck: There's a penguin at the Cincinnati Zoo named Cookie, and a video of him making crazy noises while he's being tickled is racking up a ton of views on YouTube (--Search for "Cookie the Little Penguin." The tickling starts at 1:04.)



#4.) A Golfer Used a Record-Breaking Sixteen Strokes on One Hole:


A golfer named KEVIN NA racked up 16 strokes on ONE HOLE at the Valero Texas Open in San Antonio over the weekend. His tee shot went in the woods, so he teed up another ball, which also went in the woods. --Then he couldn't get the ball OUT of the woods, and by the time it was all over, he'd set a new PGA record for most strokes on a par four. (--Search for "Kevin Na Cards a 16 in Round One." He takes shots at :30, 1:06, 3:03, 3:12, 3:18, 3:23, and 3:50. Then he finally makes it out of the woods at 4:02.)



The Five Craziest Taxes in History:


Today is tax day, and if you think the stuff WE get taxed for is crazy, check out this list from It's five of the craziest taxes in history.


#1.) Urine. Ancient Rome's sewage system was revolutionary, but a lot of the public toilets were more like porta-potties, and all the waste was collected in large containers underneath. --Now, here's where it gets really gross: An emperor in the first century named Vespasian realized that the urine could be used for a variety of different things: --Roman tanners used it to soften leather, and people even used it in their LAUNDRY because the ammonia made their togas whiter. --So the emperor had workers collect the urine, then he distributed it to people and charged them a tax for the delivery.


#2.) Soap. Regular baths were starting to get popular in England in the 17th century, but then everyone's favorite ultra-religious Puritan, Oliver Cromwell, overthrew the government, and HE thought that being too clean was ungodly. --So to discourage it, he placed a large tax on soap. And since future kings liked getting the money, the tax stayed in place for 200 years.


#3.) Beards. In 1700, beards were still popular in Russia, but they were out of style in the rest of Europe. And Peter the Great wanted to make Russia more modern, so he basically made beards illegal. --The only way you could have one was if you paid a large yearly tax for it. And it was controversial because men in the Russian Orthodox church HAD to have long beards.


#4.) Cowardice. In the 12th century, land-owning knights in England had to fight if there was a war. --But if they didn't want to risk their lives, and they had enough money, they could pay a tax called "scutage" (--pronounced SKOO-tej). Then the king would use that money to hire OTHER soldiers.



#5.) Wigs and Hats. In the 18th century, the British government started taxing wigs and wig powder, which were only used by rich people. But they were going out of style anyway, and people just stopped wearing them. --So to make up for it, the government started taxing hats, which were popular with rich people AND poor people. --When you bought a hat, you had to pay the tax, then they stamped the inside of it. And if you were caught trying to FORGE the stamp, you got sentenced to death. (



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