HOLLYWOOD DIRT OVERFLOW (03-22-11)

SHEEN-ANIGANS

Does CBS Want Charlie Sheen Back on "Two and a Half Men"?

CBS is known as the "Eye Network" . . . so it would be ironic if they were the ones who BLINKED in the staring contest with CHARLIE SHEEN, right? But that might be what happened. --There are reports all over the World Wide Web of Misinformation that CBS is trying to get Charlie back on "Two and a Half Men". And CBS President Les Moonves . . . who's been the target of some of Charlie's TRUTH TORPEDOES . . . is even involved. --Sources say he's been speaking with people at Warner Brothers TV about re-hiring Charlie. Warner Brothers produces the show, and they're the ones who actually canned him. --He's also spoken to "Two and a Half Men" creator CHUCK LORRE, telling him, quote, "Let us handle Charlie." --Why does CBS want Charlie back so badly? Because he's WINNING. Duh. (???) --One source says, quote, "They saw how popular his tour has become, how it has been selling out, and when word spread that he started talking to Fox about a late-night show, some decision-makers got a little antsy." --Obviously, Charlie's return depends almost entirely on whether or not he and Lorre can work together again after all the HATRED that's been spewed between them over the last few months. (--Mostly from Charlie. At least publicly.) --We assume Charlie would also have to drop his $100 million lawsuit against Lorre and Warner Brothers. --Charlie may not be looking to return to CBS, though. Yesterday, he dropped a Tweet that made it sound like he's serious about heading to Fox. --He said, quote, "#Foxball; Perhaps a new lair.....? A Fox and a Warlock? epic. ybw c." It was followed by a link to a picture of a Fox logo. (--You can see it here.)


Brooke Mueller Is Not Going to Extend Her Restraining Order Against Charlie Sheen:

BROOKE MUELLER is letting CHARLIE SHEEN off the hook. Her temporary restraining order against Charlie expires TODAY . . . and her attorneys informed the court that she will NOT petition to have it extended.


Martin Sheen Thinks Charlie is "Emotionally Crippled":

MARTIN SHEEN thinks his son CHARLIE is EMOTIONALLY CRIPPLED. In an interview with one of the not-always-reliable British tabloids, Martin says, quote, "When you're addicted, you don't grow emotionally. --"So when you get clean and sober you're starting at the moment you started using drugs or alcohol. You're emotionally crippled." --He adds, quote, "I know what hell he's living in. I've had psychotic episodes in public. One of them was on camera: the opening scene of 'Apocalypse Now'. --"I know what Charlie is going through. And when you do something like that, that is out of control, that's the most difficult thing. You have to have courage." --Charlie's brother, EMILIO ESTEVEZ, thinks Charlie can pull through this . . . quote, "There's always hope, and there are so many examples of people pulling themselves out of the (crap) and having a rebirth. --"So you just pray for him and hope he has that moment of clarity." TOP LIST ALERT: One of Martin Sheen's other roles was playing President Bartlett on "The West Wing". And a recent poll found that some people would rather vote for Charlie Sheen for President instead of Sarah Palin. So, check out:


Evan Rachel Wood Was Counseled Through A Nude Scene by Kate Winslet:

EVAN RACHEL WOOD had to do a nude scene for the upcoming HBO miniseries "Mildred Pierce", and she was pretty nervous about it. --Luckily, her co-star was KATE WINSLET . . . the queen of tasteful and "necessary-to-the-plot" nudity. -Evan says, quote, "I was a lot more nervous than I thought I was going to be. I looked at Kate and she was like, 'You've got to do it. Trust me, it's so brave. Put a merkin on and you'll be fine.'" --"Merkin" is a fancy, old-fashioned term for a PUBIC WIG. And Evan needed one because the miniseries is set in the 1930s . . . when women didn't groom DOWN THERE. Apparently, Evan was lacking in the FUZZINESS department. (--"Mildred Pierce" debuts on March 27th.)
Tish Cyrus Says Her Family Is Better Than It's Ever Been:

TISH CYRUS agrees with BILLY RAY that things are moving in the right direction. In a post on her Facebook page, she says, quote, "Big thanks to all of our family, friends, and fans who have kept us in their thoughts and prayers. --"I feel so blessed to have so much support from all of you. Our family weathered a huge storm and I feel we are stronger than we have ever been. Much love to all of you guys! You're the BEST."


Does Michael Lohan Want Dina Back?

I think we can all agree that the marriage of MICHAEL and DINA LOHAN is irreparably damaged. All of us except Michael. --RadarOnline.com says that Michael admits on the upcoming season of "Celebrity Rehab" that he wants Dina back. --A production source says, quote, "It's a shocking revelation, to say the least. Michael feels that Lindsay's troubles are because of his divorce with Dina. Michael wants his family back." (--Michael is being treated on the show for "anger issues". The season kicks off in May.)


Sean Penn and Scarlett Johansson Went to Dinner Again:

I think we can now officially call SEAN PENN and SCARLETT JOHANSSON a couple. They were spotted having dinner together again over the weekend. --They were at a place called Cecconi's in West Hollywood . . . and while they were with other friends, they were obviously together. --A source says, quote, "They looked really happy together. They playfully touched each other a few times. They were really just laughing, and it seemed like they were having a lot of fun together."


Has Tiger Woods Known His New Girlfriend Since She Was Little?

We've learned a little bit more about TIGER WOODS' 22-year-old girlfriend Alyse Lahti Johnston. --Turns out her stepdad, Alastair Johnston, has been Tiger's NEIGHBOR in Windermere, Florida for 15 years. So Tiger's known Alyse for a long time . . . and long before she was LEGAL. --And that means she also knew Tiger's ex-wife, ELIN NORDEGREN. --Alastair . . . who's one of the big shots at Tiger's sports agency . . . says, quote, "Tiger Woods has been my next door neighbor for 15 years and Alyse has known him all her life."


Mel Gibson and Robert Downey Jr. Had Some In-N-Out Burger Together on Sunday:

MEL GIBSON had ROBERT DOWNEY JR.'S back when he was battling substance abuse problems and nobody else would stick up for him. So Robert has been returning the favor and refusing to bail on Mel these days. --The two of them solidified their bond with a little MAN-DATE Sunday afternoon at In-N-Out Burger. There's no word what they discussed. (--Here's a picture.)


Bam Margera Got Knocked Out During a Hotel Fight . . . By a Hefty Lady:

"Jackass" jackass BAM MARGERA says he got knocked out cold during a hotel fight in Texas over the weekend. And the person who delivered the knockout blow was . . . A HEFTY LADY. --Bam says he was walking through a crowd of rowdy drunks, when one of them said something rude to him. So he started picking on a woman in the group who was a bit candy coated. --He called her things like a SEA OTTER and a BEACHED WHALE. So fisticuffs ensued. One of the guys knocked Bam to the ground, and the woman delivered the KILL STRIKE . . . putting him on Dream Street for a full seven minutes. --There's no word if she clocked him with fist or foot, but when he woke up, his face was covered in blood and he had a black eye. He also lost a $500 bracelet. (--I give Bam credit for admitting he was cold-cocked by a chick. Most guys wouldn't.)
Donald Trump Says He Screwed Muammar Gaddafi On a Real Estate Deal:

In these uncertain times with Libya, DONALD TRUMP wants you to know that he'd make a great president . . . because he once screwed MUAMMAR GADDAFI in a real estate deal. --He says, quote, "I've dealt with everybody. And by the way, I can tell you something else. I dealt with Gaddafi. I rented him a piece of land. --"He paid me more for one night than the land was worth for two years, and then I didn't let him use the land. That's what we should be doing. I don't want to use the word 'screwed', but I screwed him." (--It happened on Fox News yesterday. You can check out video here.)


Randy Quaid Debuted His New Song, "Star Whackers" At a Club in Canada Friday Night:

There's no doubt that RANDY QUAID lost his title as the King of Celebrity Crazy when CHARLIE SHEEN lost his mind. But on Friday night, Randy made a bid to reclaim his crown. --Remember how Randy and his wife EVI spun that crazy conspiracy about "STAR WHACKERS"? --They were some kind of secret society whose goal was to break celebrities down . . . even KILL THEM when necessary . . . in order to steal their fortunes. --Well, Randy went and wrote a SONG about it. It's called "Star Whackers" . . . and he debuted it at a club this past Friday night in Vancouver . . . where he and his wife are basically hiding out from the U.S. legal system. --He was backed by a band he oh-so-hilariously called THE FUGITIVES. (--You can see video here. WARNING! The song contains a reference to DAVID CARRADINE'S death that includes the line, "Or maybe squeeze your balls with a nylon rope." He also says the word "ass" a few times.)


"My Big Fat Greek Wedding" Is the Most Profitable Movie of All Time:

What would you say is the most profitable movie of all time? No, it's not "Titanic" or "Avatar". Sure, those movies made the most money . . . but they also COST a ton, too. So the return on the investment wasn't that great. --No, the most profitable movie of all time is "My Big Fat Greek Wedding". (???) --If you adjust for inflation, the movie was made for a mere $6 million . . . and it made $369 million. That's a 6150% return on the filmmakers' investment.

--Here are the Top 10 Most Profitable Movies of All Time, with dollar amounts adjusted for inflation . . .

#1.) "My Big Fat Greek Wedding": Made for $6 million . . . did $369 million in box office . . . for a 6,150% return.

#2.) "E.T.": Made for $25 million . . . did $793 million in box office . . . for a 3,172% return.

#3.) "Slumdog Millionaire": Made for $15 million . . . did $378 million in box office . . . for a 2,520% return.

#4.) "Pretty Woman": Made for $23 million . . . did $463 million in box office . . . for a 2,013% return.

#5.) "Grease": Made for $20 million . . . did $394 million in box office . . . for a 1,975% return.

#6.) "Star Wars": Made for $40 million . . . did $775 million in box office . . . for a 1,938% return.

#7.) "American Beauty": Made for $20 million . . . did $356 in box office . . . for a 1,780% return.

#8.) "The Passion of the Christ": Made for $35 million . . . did $612 million in box office . . . for a 1,749% return.

#9.) "Home Alone": Made for $30 million . . . did $477 million in box office . . . for a 1,590% return.

#10.) "Ghost": Made for $35 million . . . did $506 million in box office . . . for a 1,446% return.
Kiefer Sutherland Says the "24" Movie Will Be Out Next Year:

On "The View" yesterday, KIEFER SUTHERLAND said the "24" movie will be out NEXT YEAR. And he should know, since he's the star of the thing. --But it sounds like a lot of work has to be done to make that happen. The movie hasn't gone into production yet, and according to "Entertainment Weekly", there's still no director . . . and there may not even be a script. --Earlier this year, Kiefer said Fox rejected the latest script, but that he remained committed to the project. He described the movie as, quote, "the little engine that could." He also said Fox was working with TONY SCOTT on the project. (--That should be good news if you're a "24" fan. Tony Scott directed "True Romance", "Enemy of the State", "Top Gun", "Days of Thunder", "Man on Fire", "Spy Game", "Crimson Tide" and most recently "Unstoppable".)


Ricky Gervais and Will Arnett Will Guest Star on the Season Finale of "The Office":

The season finale of "The Office" may not include STEVE CARELL . . . but it will feature guest stars WILL ARNETT, who played Gob on "Arrested Development" and RICKY GERVAIS, who of course starred on the British "Office". --The one-hour finale will air on May 19th. --For what it's worth, "sources" tell "Entertainment Weekly" that just because these guys are appearing in the finale, we shouldn't assume that either of them will be Steve Carell's replacement. (--Hmm. I'm thinking there's a chance that Ricky's character is coming to Scranton to help them find a replacement for Steve's character . . . and I think that COULD be Will Arnett.)


Tuesday TV Reminders: (--Check your local listings.)

--"Best in Film: The Greatest Movies of Our Time" . . . 9:00 to 11:00 P.M. on ABC. (--It includes interviews with Harrison Ford, Anthony Hopkins and Olivia Newton John. Tom Bergeron co-hosts with "Primetime's" Cynthia McFadden.) --Watch clips for movies in each category HERE. They include Best Comedy, Best Sci-Fi, Best Horror film, Best Chick Flick and the Greatest Line.)

--"Destination Truth" [4th Season Premiere] . . . 9:00 to 10:00 P.M. on Syfy.

--"Our America with Lisa Ling" [1st Season Finale] . . . 10:00 to 11:00 P.M. on OWN. (--Lisa Ling explores an entire family's heroin addiction.)

--"Marcel's Quantum Kitchen" [SERIES Premiere] . . . 10:00 to 11:00 P.M. on Syfy. (--Chef Marcel Vigneron's catering and event company are challenged to prepare a safari-themed party to raise awareness for an animal sanctuary.)

--"Big Brian: The Fortune Seller" [SERIES Premiere] . . . 10:00 to 11:00 P.M. on TruTV. (--A new series that follows estate-sale supervisor Brian Elenson and his crew as they discover the latest in trash-or-treasure.)


NEW ON VIDEO TODAY

--"The Tourist" - Johnny Depp plays an American tourist whose flirtation with a stranger gets him mistaken for an international criminal. Angelina Jolie's the chick who sets him up. But at least she regrets it once the bullets start flying.

--"Skyline" - The alien invasion flick that had people being sucked up by weird lights in the sky. It starred Eric Balfour and Donald Faison from "Scrubs". And apparently anyone who looks into the light somehow falls under the aliens' control.

--"Yogi Bear" - The CGI live-action mix, with Dan Aykroyd as the voice of Yogi, Justin Timberlake as the voice of Boo Boo, and Tom Cavanagh as Ranger Smith.

--"How Do You Know" - A romantic comedy starring Reese Witherspoon as a woman torn between two men: Owen Wilson and Paul Rudd. Jack Nicholson is also in it as Paul Rudd's father.


TV Series On DVD:

--"Scarecrow & Mrs. King: Season 2" . . . a five-disc set. (--It ran for four seasons and starred "Charlie's Angel's" minx Kate Jackson as a housewife turned spy.)

--"Hawkeye: The Complete Series" . . . a four-disc set of the 1994 series that starred "Wonder Woman's" Lynda Carter as the wife of a frontiersman. Hawkeye was played by "Matt Houston" superstar Lee Horsley. It only ran for one season.

--"Marcus Welby, M.D.: The Best of Season 1" . . . a two-disc DVD set with the 10 best episodes from the first season. (--It ran for seven seasons.)

--"The Bill Cosby Show: The Best of Season 1" . . . a single-disc of the 10 best episodes from the first season of his 1969 sitcom. (--It ran for two seasons.)


NEW MUSIC OUT TODAY


--"F.A.M.E.", Chris Brown (--Initially, Chris said F.A.M.E. stood for "Forgiving All My Enemies" . . . then he changed it to: "Fans Are My Everything" . . . and THEN he said that both acronyms would work for the album's themes.)

(--His guests include: Ludacris and Justin Bieber, plus Lil Wayne and Busta Rhymes who both appear on his single, "Look at Me Now".)

--"I Remember Me", Jennifer Hudson (--It includes the single "Where You At".)

--"Angles", The Strokes (--Their first album in five years.)

--"All You Need Is Now", Duran Duran (--This is their 13th album. R&B minx Kelis is featured on the song "The Man Who Stole a Leopard", and Ana Matronic from Scissor Sisters is on the track "Safe (In The Heat of The Moment)".)

--"Vices & Virtues", Panic! At The Disco (--This is their first album since the band split in half . . . with guitarist Ryan Ross and bassist Jon Walker leaving to form The Young Veins. The disc includes the single "The Ballad of Mona Lisa".)

--"Glam Nation Live", Adam Lambert (--This is his first live album. Some versions include a bonus DVD.)

--"Awesome As (Eff)", Green Day (--These tracks were recorded during their 21st Century Breakdown World Tour. There's also a DVD or Blu-Ray with footage of a concert filmed in Japan.)

TODAY'S NEW VIDEO GAMES

This Week's New Games Include the "Crysis" Sequel, a New "LEGO Star Wars", and the Medieval Version of the "Sims":

--"LEGO Star Wars III: The Clone Wars" (E) . . . on Xbox360, PS3, Wii, PSP, DS and PC. The latest LEGO game features characters from the first two seasons of the animated series "Star Wars: The Clone Wars". You can also play as either a Jedi or a Seperatist and use abilities like Squad command. (Trailer)

--"The Sims Medieval" (T) . . . on PC. The first "Sims" game set in medieval times allows players to build a kingdom by completing quests. Unlike the previous games in the series, this one has a definite beginning and end. But don't worry you'll still be able to procreate with any fair maiden you can manage to woo. (Trailer)

--"Crysis 2" (M) . . . on Xbox360, PS3, and PC. You play as a Force Recon Marine fighting aliens in New York City in the year 2023. The Nanosuit from the previous game has also received a few upgrades, including Cloak and Armor mode. (Trailer)

--"PlayStation Move Heroes" (E) . . . on PS3. A motion-controller crossover of the classic Playstation games, "Jak and Dexter", "Ratchet and Clank", and "Sly Cooper" that lets you do two player co-op as the six main characters from the three franchises. There are 50 levels and five weapon types to make you flail around like a crazy person in your living room as you try to melee, whip, bowl, and hurls projectiles. (Trailer)


--"Mayhem 3D" (E10+) . . . on Xbox360 and PS3. A demolition derby / racing game. (Trailer)

ESRB Game Ratings: (E) for Everyone; (T) for Teen; (M) for Mature (18+)


SAMMY HAGAR; ALIEN INFORMANT

Sammy Hagar Says Aliens Once Abducted Him, and "Wirelessly Downloaded" His Brain . . . and He's Serious:

SAMMY HAGAR talks about his interest in mysticism, psychics and numerology in his new book, "Red: My Uncensored Life in Rock". (--It came out last week.) --And in a new interview with MTV, Sammy talks about the time when he was ABDUCTED by ALIENS, who "wirelessly downloaded" his brain. And he's SERIOUS. --Sammy explains, quote, "I think I have [been abducted]. It was real. [Aliens] were plugged into me. It was a download situation. This was long before computers or any kind of wireless. There weren't even wireless telephones. --"Looking back now, it was like, '(Eff), they downloaded something into me!' Or they uploaded something from my brain, like an experiment. 'See what this guy knows.' That happened. That friggin' happened, I'll tell you right now." --The event is only alluded to as a DREAM in the book, because the guy Sammy worked with on the book suggested that he downplay the alien stuff. Sammy says he told him, quote, "Aw, people don't want to hear that (crap)." --And he added, quote, "I don't want to sound like I'm crazy." --But that doesn't mean that Sammy won't talk about it. He says, quote, "My opinions about the UFO stuff, well, I could write a whole book just devoted to that. I love it, man. I'm into it deep." --He also shares ANOTHER extraterrestrial experience. --Sammy says, quote, "[It] happened when I was about four . . . one time I saw what I considered to be, well, at the time I thought it was a car with no wheels. --"We lived out in the country and I saw this thing floating across a field, creating this big dust storm. I threw rocks at it and (stuff). And I don't know what happened after that. I guess [I blacked out]. I just have no memory of it. And that wasn't a dream. It was during daylight."


Why Hasn't Sammy Talked Much About His Alien Encounters in the Past?

SAMMY HAGAR says he hasn't talked much about his alien encounters in the past because, quote, "I couldn't talk about it because I didn't know how to explain it. I didn't understand the technology. But now I'm pretty sure it was a wireless situation. --"Either a download or upload . . . --"They were tapped into my brain and the knowledge was transferred back and forth. I could see them and everything while it was happening. There was a visual involved, almost like . . . I don't know . . . don't get me going!" (--That would likely just be a "download," not an "upload." The aliens were receiving the information from Sammy, so there's no uploading involved unless they were using an FTP to transfer the info onto their own servers.) (--When Sammy was four years old, he had little information to provide, so the files could probably have been transferred at their original size, which would preserve the quality of the content being transmitted . . .) (--But if the later event happened in the late '70s, Sammy would have been around 30 years old . . . and those files would surely need to be condensed into some sort of .zip file, and even then it could take FOREVER wirelessly.) (--I don't know. Maybe the aliens have a good I.T. guy.) --Sammy says he HAS included a lot of his extraterrestrial thoughts in his lyrics . . . but, quote, "They've never been the hits. They've only been the underground songs." --One example is "Someone Out There" off his 1977 solo album "Musical Chairs".
--Here are the lyrics:

"Travelin' through heaven all alone with a star
I can't help but wondering if we really are.
And I know it may sound crazy, but, I felt so all alone
And just today, I realized how much and how far we've grown.

"And I feel so scared and lonely
To think we're the only ones.
When I know there's someone out there.
And someday they'll come.
I know they're gonna come.
Oh, yea!

"I watch through my window so late every night.
I'm hopin' to see your light shine up in the sky.
So please don't you keep me waiting all alone here with my thoughts.
Well, I believe my imagination, it's all that I've really got."
Justin Bieber, U2 and Rihanna Will Appear on a Japan Benefit Album:

Universal Music is "rushing out" a special compilation album to raise funds for the Japanese quake and tsunami victims. All the proceeds are going to the Japanese Red Cross. --They're hoping to have the album out by the end of THIS WEEK. That won't leave enough time to press any CDs, so it's ONLY going to be released digitally. --The track-list hasn't been finalized yet, but supposedly JUSTIN BIEBER, U2, RIHANNA, NICKI MINAJ and BON JOVI are on it. Universal is looking for artists willing to write-off their royalty fees to have their song included on the album. (--What's the rush? Will America become too desensitized to the horrific situation in Japan to toss a few bucks at this album in, say, a month or two?) (--It's not that I want more time for a CD to be pressed . . .) (--It's that Universal should create something SPECIAL. Give the artists enough time to get into a studio, and record something fresh . . . a cover, or even just a unique version of one of their own songs.) (--Not to sound selfish or anything, but if you give me a REASON to buy something, I'm more likely to actually buy it. The record companies are perpetually approaching the Digital Era in the opposite way they should.) (--Instead of throwing out a mix-tape of songs we've already heard too many times . . . like it's a "Now!" album or something . . . why not make it something new and exclusive, to put some effort into raising money.)


Is Kesha Scared of Going to Japan?

KESHA has decided to postpone a string of Japanese shows that were scheduled to begin this week. In a statement, she says, quote, "I genuinely don't think right now would be appropriate timing for me to perform in Japan . . . --"Given the content and the spirit of my show, which is all about feeling exuberant, rowdy, and wild . . . In the meantime I am going to do everything I can to help relief efforts and I encourage everyone in the world to do the same." (--Is there a chance that Kesha is just SCARED of going to Japan right now? Because for a woman who'll say or do ANYTHING to get people talking about how CRAAAAZY she is . . . it does seem like she's copping out a little here.) (--Or maybe she's right, and Japan just isn't ready to handle her right now . . . on top of everything else they're dealing with.)

TUESDAY'S SHOWBIZ EXTRAS

JAMES FRANCO got into a little online war of the words with "Oscar" writer BRUCE VILANCH, after Villanch insulted his hosting job. (Full Story)


Former SPICE GIRL MEL B. is pregnant with her third child. Three Spice Girls are now pregnant simultaneously. (Full Story)


Fake Jew MADONNA celebrated Purim by dressing up as CHARLIE CHAPLIN over the weekend. (Full Story)


JUSTIN BIEBER'S mom attempted suicide just a year before she got pregnant with him . . . because she'd been sexually abused as a child. (Full Story)


Supermodel STEPHANIE SEYMOUR went to a nude beach on St. Bart's over the weekend. She didn't get naked, but she still looked good. Some of the other beachgoers who were inadvertently caught in the paparazzi shots DID get naked . . . and did NOT look quite as good. (Full Story)


COREY HARRISON, better known as "Big Hoss" on "Pawn Stars", was arrested after allegedly getting into a brawl at a bar in Big Bear, California. He was charged with battery and obstruction. (Full Story)


MOTLEY CRUE drummer TOMMY LEE is developing a reality travel series called "Culture Shock with Tommy Lee" for Syfy. On the show, Tommy will "uncover various rituals, symbols, and other mysteries of secret societies." (Full Story)


Essence.com claims MARIAH CAREY was offered a judging gig on SIMON COWELL'S upcoming "X Factor" show . . . but she turned it down. (Full Story)


It's NOT on between COURTNEY LOVE and CHELSEA HANDLER. Courtney told the "New York Post" that an imposter has been claiming to be her on Twitter . . . and that she did NOT call Chelsea a "leathery idiot." (Full Story)


PEARL JAM singer EDDIE VEDDER is releasing a solo album, in which he'll play songs on a ukulele. It's called "Ukulele Songs", and it'll be released on May 31st. (Full Story)


"Bachelor" BRAD WOMACK called 911 yesterday morning when he noticed a guy having a panic attack in a park near his Texas home. (Full Story)


CHRISTINA AGUILERA, CEE LO GREEN, BLAKE SHELTON and MAROON 5's ADAM LEVINE . . . along with host CARSON DALY . . . have filmed this promo for NBC's upcoming singing competition, "The Voice". (Video)


HBO is developing a miniseries about former Vice President DICK CHENEY. There's no word on any casting yet. (Full Story)


NAZZY’S RANDOM STUFF

NOT-SO-STUPID NEWS

Japan Is So United After the Earthquake That Even the Japanese Mafia is Chipping In:

The earthquake in Japan was an incredible tragedy . . . but the way the country has handled the aftermath has been even more incredible. They haven't been looting, they haven't been rioting, and they've been doing everything they can to recover. --And here's another insane anecdote that shows just how much the people of Japan have pulled together: One of the groups that's doing what it can to pitch in on the relief effort is the Yakuza . . . THE JAPANESE MAFIA. --The three largest Yakuza groups . . . which would be comparable to the three largest Italian mafia crime families . . . have been contributing TONS of goods to the regions that were destroyed. --They've been sending in trucks with everything from diapers, to batteries, to food. --An anonymous Yakuza member spoke to the press and told them, quote, "There are no Yakuza or ordinary citizens or foreigners in Japan right now. We are all Japanese. We all need to help each other." --They're trying to keep their donations mostly anonymous, though . . . people might be afraid to take them if they think that will make them indebted to the mafia. But it seems like there's no ulterior motive . . . they really do just want to help. (CBS News)


A Soldier Who Survived Tours In Iraq and Afghanistan Was Killed in a Bar Fight In Texas:

It's scary to think that some of the BARS in this country are more dangerous than IRAQ and AFGHANISTAN. --28-year-old Orlando Salazar of Grand Prairie, Texas was a soldier with the U.S. Army. He survived tours in both Iraq and Afghanistan. --Then, on Saturday, he was KILLED in a bar fight in Texas. --Orlando was out with some friends and family at El Torro Loco on Saturday night when the fight broke out. Police haven't said what started it. --A group of men knocked Orlando down and started kicking him while he was on the ground, and he suffered a fatal head injury in the assault. --The police are still looking for most of the men who attacked him. They HAVE captured one, though, a 27-year-old named Jose Abel Navarro. --Orlando's father, Caesar Salazar, told reporters, quote, "[My son] should've been safer here, at home. He survived two tours and he comes home and this happens to him. --"The men who did this didn't just hurt my son, they didn't just hurt my family, they hurt a lot of people out there in this world." (CBS 11 - Dallas/Fort Worth)


A Wrestler With One Leg Wins the NCAA Championship:

Anthony Robles is a wrestler at Arizona State University. He has ONE LEG. And, yeah, that means if he tried to kick your ass literally, he'd fall down. But if you made that joke to his face, he'd have NO problem kicking your ass metaphorically. --Anthony was born without his right leg. But that hasn't stopped him from becoming a superstar amateur wrestler. And over the weekend . . . he won the NCAA championship in his weight class. --He wrestles at 125 pounds . . . that's the lightest possible weight class in college wrestling, and he kinda has to be there since he doesn't have the weight of two legs. --He started wrestling at age 14, and taught himself how to perform moves, balance, get leverage, and maneuver himself against opponents all of whom had two legs. And he taught himself QUICKLY. --Anthony won a national championship as a wrestler at his high school in Mesa, Arizona. But because of his missing leg, the scholarship offers didn't exactly come pouring in. ASU finally offered him a partial scholarship. --He's had a great four-year run for them. This is his senior year and he went undefeated: 36 wins and zero losses. --After he won the national title, Anthony announced that his wrestling career is over . . . and he's planning to become a motivational speaker. (Yahoo Sports) (--Check out this video about Anthony and his journey.)


Getting a Raise Doesn't Make You Work Harder . . . But a Pay Cut Makes You Slack Off:

There's a new study out about raises and pay cuts at work . . . but it's more about HUMAN NATURE than anything else. --The study found that when workers get raises, it doesn't make them work any harder. BUT . . . when workers have their pay cut, it DEFINITELY makes them slack off. --The main reason is that we BELIEVE we're worth a raise, and our current level of work has been rewarded . . . so there's no reason to step it up. At the same time, a pay cut is so DEVASTATING for our morale that we rebel by performing worse. (Slate)


61% of Women Have No Faith In Their Husband's Home Repair Abilities:

No offense, but your wife has no faith in your ability to make even the most basic home repairs. That doesn't make you less of a man though. We promise. --According to a new survey, 61% of women, or three out of five, say they have NO FAITH in their husband's do-it-yourself home repair abilities. --The survey also found that 24% of men would NEVER admit to their lack of do-it-yourself skills. (CalorieLab)


A Guy's Wife Made Him Return His iPad 2 . . . And When Apple Found Out They Sent Him One for Free:

This sounds like an internet rumor, but it's making the rounds online and it SOUNDS like it could be true. --Apple has been carefully monitoring the returns on their new iPad 2s since they came out last week. When people return one to an Apple Store, they ask for the reason, so they can figure out if the product has any major defects. --Well, apparently one guy returned his brand new iPad 2 . . . unopened . . . and gave the reason, quote, "Wife says no." --That response started getting passed around the Apple store . . . worked its way up to the corporate offices . . . and then worked its way up to Apple's top executives. --When two vice presidents heard that "Wife says no" was the reason for the return, they sent a brand new, FREE iPad 2 out to the guy along with a note that said, quote, "Apple says yes." (The Unofficial Apple Weblog)


Amazon Has Been Named the Top Brand In the World:

I buy a lot of stuff from Amazon.com. You probably buy a lot of stuff from Amazon.com. Amazon.com is so big now that I bet almost no one goes there anymore thinking it's a porno site featuring gigantic women. --And according to a new study, Amazon.com is now the number one brand in the world. --The study was done by a communications research firm called Millward Brown. They found that Amazon had the best mix of people believing it was both a solid, reputable brand . . . and the place to find the best value and prices. --Worldwide, the rest of the top 10 goes: Colgate . . . Nokia . . . Pampers . . . VISA . . . Coca-Cola . . . Microsoft . . . McDonald's . . . Nescafe . . . and a European supermarket chain called Lidl. --Amazon was also number one in the U.S. The rest of our list looks a little different than the global one. It goes Amazon . . . Crest . . . Coca-Cola . . . Folgers . . . Bud Light . . . Walmart . . . Microsoft . . . Colgate . . . Dell . . . and HP. --Notice that Bud Light and Walmart made our list . . . while McDonald's made the international list but not the U.S. one. -As for why Apple didn't make either list, while it's considered one of the top brands today, it scored poorly on the whole "best value and prices" half of this study. --Sony and BMW also scored well on reputation but poorly on prices. Kia, Hyundai, Vaseline, and H&M scored well on prices but poorly on reputation. (Millward Brown)
We've Gotten So Chubby That Public Buses Have Had To Reduce Their Number of Riders:

--Unfortunately, our country's collective chubbiness is starting to really put a strain on our country's buses. --Right now, the Federal Transit Authority has buses set their maximum number of riders around an assumption that the average person weighs 150 pounds. And if you look around . . . you know it's been a WHILE since that was true. --So now, the FTA is planning to raise that estimate to 175 pounds. And with that change, public buses around the country would have to shrink their max number of riders . . . and probably have to turn more people away during peak times. --Believe it or not, 175 pounds per person is still a low estimate. The FAA has airlines estimate that the average passenger weighs 190 pounds in the summer and 195 in the winter. The Coast Guard estimates boat passengers at 185 pounds. --According to the CDC, the average weight of adult men in the U.S. is now 194.7, and the average weight of the adult woman is 164.7. (USA Today)


A Heroic Pit Bull Saved a Family From a House Fire . . . But They Can't Find a New Place Because Landlords Hate Pit Bulls:

By every definition of the word, a pit bull named Diamond from Hayward, California is a hero. --Last October, the apartment her owners lived in caught on fire from an electrical problem. Diamond started barking to wake them up, and they got out. At least, most of them did. --The youngest of the family's two daughters was trapped inside as the flames engulfed the building. When firefighters finally got to her, she was hiding under a mattress, and Diamond was laying on top of it, protecting her from the flames. --The girl survived. Diamond suffered severe burns on 30% of her body, but recovered. --Now her family is having a tough time finding a new place to live . . . because landlords hate pit bulls. Even HEROIC pit bulls. --Darryl Steen owns Diamond. He says that DOZENS of landlords have turned them away . . . even ones who say that pets are welcome. --Pit bulls do have a bad reputation . . . so even though Diamond has an incredible resume and references, that hasn't been good enough to sway anyone. --For now, the family is living in a temporary apartment, and Diamond is living with relatives. (NBC 10 - Knoxville)


MEATBALL CRIMINALS

A Man In Texas Gets Into a Shootout With Police . . . Because He's Mad That Taco Bell Raised the Price of the Beefy Crunch Burrito:

Look, I can't ever support a person who took shots at innocent people, even with a BB gun. But if you're gonna lose your mind over something, this is a pretty worthwhile cause. --On Sunday afternoon, 37-year-old Ricardo Jones of San Antonio, Texas had a three-hour standoff with a SWAT team and ended up getting into a shootout with the police because he was angry. --Angry about . . . wait for it . . . his local Taco Bell raising the price of their Beefy Crunch Burrito. --See, before the standoff, Ricardo had gone through the drive-thru of his favorite Taco Bell and ordered SEVEN . . . count 'em, seven . . . Beefy Crunch Burritos. He was appalled to find the price had gone up from 99 cents to $1.49. --He was SO upset that he fired a BB gun at the Taco Bell manager . . . missed . . . then fled to a motel room. He also fired a REAL rifle in the direction of some police cars, but just took out a window. --After three hours of SWAT negotiations, they finally used tear gas to get him out of the room and subdued him. No one was hurt in the shootout. Ricardo is looking at two felony counts of aggravated assault and could get up to 40 years in prison. --As for the Taco Bell price increase, the manager is 41-year-old Brian Tillerson. He says, quote, "They did used to be 99 cents but that was just a promotion." (San Antonio Express-News)


A Man Is Arrested For Assaulting His Girlfriend With Cottage Cheese:

This might be the first time we've ever seen someone assaulted with COTTAGE CHEESE. (--Unless you count the time that Tijuana stripper tried to smother me with her thighs.) --Over the weekend, a woman in Crestview, Florida called 911 to report a cottage cheese-based crime. --She said 43-year-old Harold McCleery, who's been her boyfriend for five years, had locked her in a shed . . . thrown a container of cottage cheese at her . . . and then tried to pour gasoline on her. --She also told the police that the cottage cheese container missed her, but the cottage cheese inside splashed all over her. --Harold was arrested and charged with battery and false imprisonment. (Northwest Florida Daily News)

A Man in Georgia Asks Some Guys To Act as a Lookout While He Breaks Into Police Cars . . . But Those Guys Turned Out To Be Undercover Cops:

The St. Patrick's weekend arrest reports are starting to really roll in now, and this is a great one. On Saturday night, in Savannah, Georgia, 23-year-old Brandon Michael Rice got drunk and decided he was going to break into some police cars. -He asked a few random guys on the street to act as a lookout while he broke in. And those guys turned out to be . . . undercover cops. Brandon was immediately arrested. (NBC 3 - Savannah) (--Here's his mugshot.)


RANDOM NEWS EXTRAS

"Newsweek" gave 1,000 people the U.S. Citizenship Test . . . and a third of them didn't know who the Vice President was. (--Spoiler Alert! It's Joe Biden. Or is it . . .) (Full Story)

Suck it, France! In 2010, U.S. wine sales surpassed wine sales in France for the first time in history. (Full Story)


Sorry, but if you love buying quinoa . . . that healthy grain-like stuff . . . you're now responsible for the malnutrition of Bolivian children: An increase in American consumption of quinoa has raised its price in Bolivia, where it originated, so fewer of them can afford it. Now they're eating crappy processed food instead. (Full Story)


Birth order has an impact on allergies . . . if you're the oldest in your family, you're more likely to have them. It MAY have something to do with how parents change the way they handle the children who are born after their first. (Full Story)


Ridiculously obvious study of the day: Researchers have found that acne may negatively impact the self esteem of teenagers. (Full Story)


Somewhat obvious study of the day: Scientists have confirmed what we learned from cartoons: Cats are the #1 enemy of birds. 80% of dead birds in the study were killed by predators, and cats were responsible for 47% of the kills. (Full Story)


NOT-so-obvious study of the day: Researchers found that college girls AREN'T more bisexual than other women . . . women with bachelor's degrees were less likely to have had a same sex experience than women who didn't finish high school. (Full Story)


Someone get out the smallest violin in the world: The NFL lockout means the Packers can't get their Super Bowl rings. Since the players and owners aren't allowed to get together, they can't choose a ring design. (Full Story)


NAZZY’S SILLY VIDEOS OF THE DAY

#1.) That Chubby Kid Who Body Slammed a Bully Is Speaking Out . . . And So Is the Bully:

Last week, a video hit YouTube of a chubby 10th grader in Australia named CASEY HEYNES body slamming a skinny 12-year-old bully named RICHARD GALE. And Casey instantly became a hero for anyone who's ever been picked on. --But now both kids have done interviews explaining what happened. And while Casey says he was being picked on and just snapped, the bully claims that what the video DOESN'T show is that Casey was actually picking on HIM first. (--Search for "Casey Heynes Full Interview" and "Richard Gale Interview on Today Tonight.")


#2.) This is Why Flash Mobs Must Die . . . Especially in Canada:

Flash mobs usually do lame dance routines in train stations. But there's a new flash mob video from Canada where they somehow found a way to be even more annoying. --Someone placed an empty plastic bottle on the floor next to a recycling bin in a shopping mall food court, then waited to see how long it would take before someone picked it up and put it in the bin. --About 25 people walk by without picking it up, and when a girl finally recycles it, the mob gives her a 30 second standing ovation. No offense to Canada, but apparently no one recycles there? (--Just kidding, you know we love you guys. America's hat!) (--Search for "Flashmob With Plastic Bottle." She picks it up at 1:03.)


#3.) A Cop in Georgia Beat a Girl With a Nightstick, Pepper Sprayed Her, Then Slammed Her on the Ground Face-First:

A police officer in Savannah, Georgia has been placed on administrative leave and accused of police brutality, and if you watch the YouTube video of what he did, it's easy to see why. --The cell phone footage shows two cops breaking up a fight in the middle of an intersection. Then one of them starts hitting a guy with a nightstick until he lies down on the ground. --Up until that point, it seems excessive but not outrageous. But then one of the girls from the fight comes over and yells "stop", and the cop starts beating HER. First, he hits her hard with his nightstick at least five times, then pepper sprays her in the face. --After that, she starts rubbing her eyes and walking around, so the cop runs over to her, grabs her from behind by the BELT, yanks her back into the intersection, and slams her on the ground face-first. (--Search for "Savannah Cop Slams Female to the Ground." The cops arrive at :32. He starts hitting the girl at :48, pepper sprays her at :58, grabs her by the belt at 1:36, and slams her to the ground at 1:43.) (--WARNING: This video includes a lot of profanity, including the F-word and the S-word.)


Three Reasons You Shouldn't Take Those Anti-Radiation Pills:

Ever since they announced that small amounts of radiation from Japan's damaged nuclear plant might hit the U.S., Americans have been stocking up on potassium iodide pills, which are the only treatment available for radiation exposure. --But here are three reasons it's a bad idea to take them.

#1.) It's Not Necessary. Most experts have said there's almost no chance that large amounts of radioactive material will show up in United States. President Obama said it too . . . and you believe him, right? --So unless you're a conspiracy theorist, that should be reason enough to not take potassium iodide pills. And while the pills are generally considered safe, there are a few health concerns. --For example, they can interact with certain medications, like blood thinners. And you also shouldn't give them to kids unless you're 100% sure they're not allergic to iodine. --Allergic reactions to potassium iodide pills can include rashes, hives, swelling of the throat, fever, joint pain, and in rare cases, even death.

#2.) It Offers Limited Protection Anyway. Potassium iodide prevents radioactive iodine from invading your thyroid gland, but that's it. --It doesn't protect against other radioactive elements like cesium (--pronounced SEE-zee-um). That's being released from the damaged nuclear plant too. --So, if there WAS enough radiation floating around in the air to cause health problems, the pills would protect you from getting cancer in your thyroid, but the rest of your body would still be at risk.

#3.) The Pills Might Be Fake. According to the FDA and the Centers for Disease Control, a lot of the pills people are buying don't actually work. --Only three products have been approved by the FDA to combat radiation exposure: Iosat tablets, ThyroSafe tablets, and ThyroShield solution. --If it's not one of those, there's no guarantee that what you're paying for would help, even if large amounts of radiation DID reach the U.S. (Reader's Digest / Livestrong.com)