HOLLYWOOD DIRT OVERFLOW (09-10-10)

KAT VON D IS *NOT* PREGNANT:

Not surprisingly, KAT VON D is denying that she's pregnant with JESSE JAMES' baby. Her rep says, quote, "They've only been dating for a few weeks. She is not pregnant. That's absolutely absurd."


HULK HOGAN IS GOING TO MARRY HIS GIRLFRIEND SOON:

HULK HOGAN was released from the hospital yesterday . . . after tearing up his back last weekend while COLLECTING SEASHELLS. And he said his recent trip to the hospital has inspired him to make The Big Mistake with his girlfriend Jennifer. --He said, quote, "Now that I've had that close encounter with the other side, I'm gonna move this wedding up, I'm gonna be marrying Jennifer right away."
(--Here's video . . .)
http://www.tmz.com/videos?autoplay=true&mediaKey=712b91eb-86f2-44ae-869b-8581830db320


DOES LINDSAY LOHAN WANT A BABY???

This report comes to us from "In Touch Weekly", and it's really too silly to be true. But the implications are so frightening that it's worth discussing . . . --Sources say that LINDSAY LOHAN thinks the best way to stay sober and tame her wicked ways is to HAVE A BABY.
-A baby would solve Lindsay's problems in two ways: First, she'd have to stay sober to take care of the kid. --And second, Lindsay is the type of person who needs to be around someone all the time. Usually, she fills that need in the wrong way . . . like by hanging out with bad people and hitting clubs at night. --But a baby can provide the company she craves, and won't lead her astray like one of her usual hangers-on would. --Plus, Lindsay has seen what having kids has done for former celebu-skank NICOLE RICHIE. --A so-called "source" says, quote, "Lindsay thinks having a baby could straighten out her life."


WILL LINDSAY LOHAN DO OPRAH???

This is far from official, but so-called "sources" say LINDSAY LOHAN is close to a deal to appear on "Oprah" . . . which begins its final season on Monday. --A rep for the show refused to confirm or deny the talks, but said, quote, "Nothing has been planned."


DINA LOHAN'S HOUSE HAS BEEN VANDALIZED TWICE IN ONE WEEK:

DINA LOHAN'S Long Island home has been vandalized twice in one week. --On August 31st, someone pelted the front door with eggs and threw dirt bombs at the side of the house. Then this past Monday, somebody pulled her mailbox out of the ground. --Police are investigating, but they don't have any suspects yet. (--Check out some pics here . . .)
http://photos.tmz.com/galleries/dina_lohan_egged#tab=most_recent


BRITNEY SPEARS IS DENYING HER EX-BODYGUARD'S CLAIMS . . . AND KEVIN FEDERLINE HAS HER BACK, TOO:

BRITNEY SPEARS is denying the claims by her former bodyguard, Fernando Flores, that she sexually harassed him and abused her children. --A message posted on her website yesterday says, quote, "This lawsuit is another unfortunate situation where someone is trying to take advantage of the Spears family and make a name for himself. --"The Department of Children and Family Services conducted a proper investigation surrounding Mr. Flores' accusations and have closed the case without any further action. --"Ms. Spears and her attorneys have every expectation that this matter will be dismissed by the courts." --Meanwhile, KEVIN FEDERLINE has his ex-wife's back. K-Fed's attorney says that they knew of Flores' accusations a while back. They checked them out, and decided they were BOGUS. --He adds, quote, "[Kevin] is satisfied that the allegations are a product of economic motives. They are as baseless as they seem."

THE HOTEL WHERE VINCE NEIL ALLEGEDLY ASSAULTED A WOMAN IN AN ELEVATOR SAYS IT NEVER HAPPENED:

MOTLEY CRUE singer VINCE NEIL is still under investigation for allegedly assaulting a woman Sunday night in an elevator at the Las Vegas Hilton. --But the Hilton is on Vince's side . . . and they claim they have surveillance footage that clears him. --The hotel says, quote, "As we always do for the protection and security of our guests, we have conducted our own investigation of this incident. --"After reviewing surveillance video and interviewing witnesses, we've concluded that her allegations against Vince Neil are completely unfounded. --"We also understand that the local authorities have deemed her allegations to be without merit. Accordingly, we consider the matter closed." --But Las Vegas Police have NOT decided that the woman's allegations are without merit. At least not publicly. They say the case is still open, although no charges have been filed yet. --They are in possession of the Hilton surveillance footage. But it's not clear if they've looked at it yet. --Meanwhile, the alleged victim . . . one Jessica Radovicz . . . gave her story to TMZ.
--Jessica claims that Vince flipped out when she got into the elevator with him and asked, quote, "Excuse me sir, don't I know you from somewhere? Aren't you on TV?" --She says, quote, "All of the sudden he yelled at me, grabbed me by the arms, he threw me against the wall." --Vince then proceeded to call her names. She says, quote, "[When] I got out of the elevator I was extremely upset and extremely shooken up. (--You can check out video of Jessica's statement . . . in which she also shows off her bruises . . . here . . .)
http://www.tmz.com/videos?autoplay=true&mediaKey=69a5aac0-eea0-4e1a-83af-ee8522c1f9ec


DEMI LOVATO HAS QUIT TWITTER:

DEMI LOVATO is the latest celebrity to ditch her Twitter account. We think. --Yesterday afternoon, she Tweeted, quote, "About to say goodbye to Twitter . . . I love my fans so much but the access that other people have is uncomfortable to me." --Then she added, quote, "Twitterbreak. Peace." --However . . . Demi did NOT delete her page. And AFTER she signed off for her supposed "Twitterbreak", she Tweeted a shout-out to Eva Longoria. (--If you'd like to keep an eye on Demi's page to see if she does indeed take a break, here's the address . . .) http://twitter.com/ddlovato


KRISTEN STEWART SMELLS BAD WHEN SHE GETS NERVOUS:

Here's something you didn't know about KRISTEN STEWART: When she gets nervous, she SMELLS BAD. --She tells "Stylist" magazine, quote, "When I'm nervous, I'm so mindless. I twiddle my thumbs and my hands sweat and I smell bad." (--Now you know.)


ONE OF THE INDIAN GUYS FROM "THE 40-YEAR-OLD VIRGIN" IS ON TRIAL FOR STABBING HIS GIRLFRIEND 20 TIMES:

SHELLEY MALIL . . . who played the younger of STEVE CARELL'S Indian co-workers in "The 40-Year-Old Virgin" . . . is on trial for attempted murder, because he allegedly stabbed his girlfriend 20 TIMES in August of 2008. --Well, he took the stand yesterday, and said he did it by MISTAKE. --See, when Shelley went to his girlfriend's house that night, there was another guy there. Tempers flared, chaos erupted and . . . according to Shelley, he thought the guy was attacking him so he retaliated. --He claims he thought he was stabbing the guy, because it was dark. -He said, quote, "I'm sorry . . . I had no idea. I saw the pictures [of her wounds] for the first time, I was stunned. When I look at those pictures, I still can't believe the knife I was holding was responsible for all those injuries."
(--If you care, you can read about the gory details in "People" here . . .)
http://www.people.com/people/article/0,,20420401,00.html


TOM BRADY WAS INVOLVED IN A PRETTY BAD CAR ACCIDENT YESTERDAY . . . BUT HE'S OKAY:

TOM BRADY was involved in a pretty bad car accident yesterday morning in Boston, but he's okay. One of the other people involved wasn't so lucky, though. --Tom's Audi collided with a minivan at an intersection shortly before 7:00 A.M. The driver of the van was okay, but a 49-year-old male passenger was knocked unconscious. --He had to be removed with the JAWS OF LIFE and taken to the hospital. His injuries were said to be serious, but not life-threatening. --The accident was NOT Tom's fault. The van driver ran a red light and crossed in front of Tom, who had the green. Tom even tried to swerve to get out of his way. --It turns out this guy . . . the 21-year-old son of the man who was hospitalized . . . has multiple moving violations on his record, and he's had his license suspended at least FIVE TIMES in the last three years. --Brady was well enough to practice with the Patriots yesterday afternoon, and nobody's saying anything about him missing their opening game on Sunday at home against the Bengals. --Tom's agent released a statement saying, quote, "I want to thank the safety personnel for their service, and express our concern and support for the well-being of the occupants of the other vehicle."
(--TMZ posted some video from right after the accident . . . before any emergency personnel even showed up. Check it out here . .) (--WARNING!!! This video is slightly graphic. You can see the unconscious man, and there's a little bit of blood on his head . )
http://www.tmz.com/2010/09/09/tom-brady-car-crash-photo-boston-new-england-patriots/

(--Brady got some GOOD news later in the day yesterday. He signed a four-year contract extension with the Patriots. The deal is worth $72 million . . . and $48.5 million of that is guaranteed salary.) (--That makes Tom the highest-paid player in NFL history.)


FLOYD MAYWEATHER JR. HAS BEEN ACCUSED OF BEATING UP HIS EX-GIRLFRIEND:

Boxer FLOYD MAYWEATHER JR. has been accused of beating up Josie Harris . . . his ex-girlfriend and the mother of three of his children. --Harris called police at about 5:00 A.M. yesterday morning, claiming that Floyd hit her during an argument at her Las Vegas home. --Police have yet to speak with Floyd, and no charges have been filed yet. --Harris made similar accusations against Floyd in 2003 . . . but the charges were dropped two years later, when Harris admitted she LIED because she was angry that Floyd had left her for another woman. --Floyd has at least one supporter in the public arena: 50 CENT. 50 Tweeted yesterday that he'd just talked to Floyd, and he believes Harris is FULL OF IT. --He said, quote, "Another case of angry baby mama wanting money . . . She's claiming he hit her but has no bruises. Floyd went to see his kids last night if a fighter of floyd caliber hits u, u would b bruised." --He added, quote, "I talked to him before and after the situation he wasn't even upset. He said he asked her why was the house so dirty she started trippin'."


THE FOURTH "RESIDENT EVIL" HITS THEATERS TODAY . . . ALONG WITH THE JOAQUIN PHOENIX MOCKUMENTARY AND THE NEW KATIE HOLMES MOVIE:

#1.) "Resident Evil: Afterlife" (R) (It's also playing in 3D, if that's your thing.) --This is the fourth film in the "Resident Evil" series. Milla Jovovich once again plays Alice, the only human to ever successfully bond with the T-virus that's turning everyone else into zombies. In this one, she hunts down the head of the Umbrella Corporation. --Ali Larter, who played survivor Claire Redfield in "Resident Evil: Extinction", is also back for this movie . . . and "Prison Break's" Wentworth Miller gets to play her brother.
Trailer: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ly_izxQsHIA
Official Site: http://www.residentevil-movie.com/

#2.) "I'm Still Here" (Not Rated) (Limited)

--The documentary about Joaquin Phoenix's supposed attempt to "find himself" and become a rapper that was filmed by his brother-in-law Casey Affleck. --It culminated in a bizarre appearance on "The Late Show with David Letterman", and according to the "L.A. Times" the film also includes Joaquin being defecated on and, quote, "more male frontal nudity than you'd find in some gay porn films." (--Here's that CLASSIC clip of Joaquin on "Letterman" . . . which ends with Letterman telling him, quote, "I'm sorry you couldn't be here tonight" . . .)
Joaquin and Letterman: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ENJr98KXs5g
(--And here's an amusing clip of Joaquin talking with Diddy about film money . . .)
Joaquin and Diddy: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HSUemAg-Ks4
Trailer: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cFawjKrxz-M
Official Site: http://www.imstillheremovie.com/


#3.) "The Romantics" (PG-13) (Limited)

--Katie Holmes plays a bridesmaid trying to avoid getting sucked into a love triangle with her ex-boyfriend on the night before his wedding. "True Blood" minx Anna Paquin plays the bride and Josh Duhamel is the groom. --The cast includes Elijah Wood, "The O.C.'s" Adam Brody, and blonde "Glee" minx Diana Agron . . . who's still hoping to get Katie to guest star on next season's "Glee".
Trailer: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U-sgWHXJfZ4
Official Site: http://www.theromanticsmovie.com/

#4.) "Legendary" (PG-13) (Limited)

--"Dexter's" Devon Graye plays a scrawny teenager who joins his high school wrestling team to try to get the attention of his older brother, WWE rassler John Cena. Patricia Clarkson plays their mom, and Danny Glover is a wise old man who guides him.
Trailer: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZPsd8EH4cFE
Official Site: http://legendarythemovie.com/

#5.) "The Virginity Hit" (R) (Limited)

--A comedy about a skinny geek's misguided attempts to lose his virginity, while being recorded by his group of dorky friends. It doesn't star anyone you've heard of, but it was produced by Will Ferrell and Adam McKay, the team behind "Anchorman", "Talladega Nights", "Step Brothers", and "The Other Guys".
Red Band Trailer: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jK23H_CLTTg
Official Site: http://www.thevirginityhit.com/


MTV IS PLANNING TWO "JERSEY SHORE" TV SPECIALS:

Perhaps not surprisingly, MTV wants to capitalize on the surging popularity of "Jersey Shore" by adding two TV specials to the end of the show's second season. (--"Jersey Shore" averaged 2.7 million viewers in its first season. The most-watched episode was the season finale, which attracted 4.8 million viewers.) (--Every Season Two episode has eclipsed that. Through six episodes, this season is averaging 5.6 million viewers. The ratings for last night's episode aren't in yet, but last week's episode drew a series-high 6.5 million viewers.) --The first special will be a "cast reunion show." It'll air on October 28th. (--The Season Two finale will air either the week before, or on October 14th. A date hasn't been officially announced. Season Three will begin sometime next year.) --MTV will also air a "behind-the-scenes" special, but there's no airdate for that yet.


"JERSEY SHORE" HAS MADE "GUIDO" A NEW BUZZ WORD:

For better or worse, "Jersey Shore" has popularized the term "guido," which of course is a negative slang word for young Italian-Americans, but is used flippantly . . . if not endearingly . . . on the show --A research company called The Global Language Monitor has published a report saying that "guido" is one of the most-used new words of the 2009-2010 TV season. --It's actually THIRD, behind "BP Spillcam" (???) . . . the live-camera underwater feeds of the oil spill in the Gulf of Mexico . . . and "dysfunctional," which was apparently popularized by the ABC comedy "Modern Family". -The company used some kind of complex math formula to determine this . . . using data on the frequency of words like these on the Internet and in print media. --Other terms that charted high on the list are: "Lady Gaga" . . . "rude," which supposedly came out of talk of SIMON COWELL leaving "American Idol" . . . and "nice," which became a buzz word because of BETTY WHITE. --The Global Language Monitor "explains," quote, "The word 'nice' is associated with Betty White over 1.1 million times on Google." (--OK . . .) --Last year's top new term was "Obamavision." (--I'm having trouble wrapping my head around how this works, but I do know that I'm hearing "guido" a LOT more since "Jersey Shore" premiered. In any event, you can find the complete Top 14 list, here . . . )http://www.languagemonitor.com/television-words/top-telewords-of-the-20092010-season/


SNOOKI SAYS SHE'S NOT A "LINDSAY LOHAN WANNABE":

SNOOKI has responded to a judge's assertion that she's acting like a, quote, "LINDSAY LOHAN wannabe." And she says that's not true. --Snooki tells "People" magazine, quote, "I definitely thought it was harsh. I never drank and drove, I don't do drugs . . . I do nothing that Lindsay does, so it was definitely a little overboard." --But she adds, quote, "I'm over it."


MISCHA BARTON FEELS RESPONSIBLE FOR RUINING TV:

MISCHA BARTON believes that her old show "The O.C." is responsible for DESTROYING more than her own life . . . OK, I made that part up . . . she thinks it RUINED TV. . . at least for people who hate shows like "The Hills". -She says, quote, "As fun as ['The O.C.'] was and cool as it was, it spawned all these reality TV shows like 'The Real O.C.' and 'The Real Laguna' or whatever. --"That's gotten a bit out of control. For me, it's a bit funny because I feel like I almost aided the problem for young girls and for that genre."


LOU REED SAYS HE DID *NOT* REJECT SUSAN BOYLE:

SUSAN BOYLE canceled a planned performance on "America's Got Talent" on Wednesday night at the last minute . . . but it was NOT because LOU REED refused to clear her to perform his song, "Perfect Day". (--The fine journalists over at TMZ had Susan BURSTING INTO TEARS after she was informed that Lou was going to block her performance . . . basically because he hated her.)
--One of Lou's reps tells "Access Hollywood" that it didn't go down like that. --Instead, Lou's people say the show asked for clearance to use the song . . . seemingly at the last minute . . . and he consented, but apparently the paperwork couldn't go through in time. --A rep for Susan says that Susan was looking forward to the performance . . . and was upset that it didn't end up happening. (--For the record, Susan's "Perfect Day" cover is expected to appear on her next album, "The Gift", which will hit stores on November 29th.)


WEEKEND TV REMINDERS

(--Check your local listing for times in your area.)
FRIDAY TV REMINDERS:

--"Stand Up To Cancer" . . . 8:00 to 9:00 P.M. on ABC, CBS and NBC. (--Katie Couric, Diane Sawyer and Brian Williams host a fund raiser for cancer research.)
(--Musical performers include . . . Leona Lewis, Orianthi, Natasha Bedingfield, Lady Antebellum, Stevie Wonder, Queen Latifah, and Martina McBride.)
(--You can see a full list of participants HERE.)
(--There are a TON of celebrities involved too, including . . . Christina Applegate, George Clooney, Lance Armstrong, Adam Sandler, Denzel Washington, Seth MacFarlane, Cindy Crawford, Gwyneth Paltrow, Apolo Ohno and Tatyana Ali.)

--"Eureka" [4th Season Finale] . . . 9:00 to 10:00 P.M. on Syfy.

--"20/20" . . . 10:00 to 11:00 P.M. on ABC. (--Barbara Walters examines the rare disease known as progeria that causes children to age rapidly when she focuses on the two girls profiled in TLC's 2009 documentary "6 Going on 60".)

--"Four Weddings" [2nd Season Premiere] . . . 10:00 to 11:00 P.M. on TLC.

--"Fashion Police" [SERIES Premiere] . . . 10:30 to 11:00 P.M. on E! (--Joan Rivers picks apart . . . and discusses the week in fashion.)

--"Kids in the Hall" [1st Season Finale] . . . 10:30 to 11:00 P.M. on IFC.

SATURDAY TV REMINDERS:

--"NASCAR Racing" [Sprint Cup Series] . . . 7:30 to 11:30 P.M. Eastern on ABC.

--"U.S. Open Tennis" [Women's Final] . . . 8:00 to 10:00 P.M. Eastern on CBS.

--"Cops" [23rd Season Premiere] . . . 8:00 to 8:30 P.M. on Fox. (--The show celebrates its 800th episode.)

--"America's Most Wanted" [24th Season Premiere] . . . 9:00 to 10:00 P.M. on Fox.

--"Saturday Night Live" . . . 11:30 P.M. to 1:00 A.M. on NBC. (--Colt's quarterback Peyton Manning guest hosts and Carrie Underwood is the musical guest.) (REPEAT)

SUNDAY TV REMINDERS:

--"U.S. Open Tennis" [Men's Final] . . . 4:00 to 7:00 P.M. Eastern on CBS.

--"Football Night in America" [5th Season Premiere]. . . 7:00 to 8:00 P.M. ET on NBC.

--"Sunday Night Football" . . . 8:15 to 11:15 P.M. Eastern on NBC. (--The Washington Redskins host the Dallas Cowboys at FedEx Field in Maryland.)

--"2010 MTV Video Music Awards" . . . 9:00 to 11:00 P.M. on MTV. (--Chelsea Handler is your host and the performers include . . . Eminem, Paramore, Linkin Park, Justin Bieber, Usher, Kanye West, Drake, and B.o.B.)

(--Presenters include Ashley Greene, Ke$ha, Nicki Minaj, Penn Badgley, Trey Songz, Selena Gomez and Ne-Yo.) (--You'll find all the nominees HERE.)

--"My Boys" [4th Season Finale] . . . 10:00 to 11:00 P.M. on TBS.

--"Over the Limit" [2nd Season Premiere] . . . 10:00 to 11:00 P.M. on TruTV.

--"Entourage" [7th Season Finale] . . . 10:30 to 11:00 P.M. on HBO.

--"The World of Jenks" [SERIES Premiere] . . . 11:00 to 11:30 P.M. on MTV. (--A guy named Andrew Jenks moves in with strangers to experience a week of their lives. Up first is a week spent with rapper Maino.)

(--Other episodes will include sleeping on the street with the homeless, hanging on the sidelines with a cheerleader, and mixing it up with a mixed martial arts fighter.)


A JONAS BROTHERS CONCERT HAS BEEN CANCELED BECAUSE OF HEAVY RAIN AND FLOODING . . . IS GOD TICKED OFF AT JOE JONAS???

The JONAS BROTHERS were supposed to perform at the 1-800-ASK-GARY Amphitheatre . . . (???) . . . in Tampa Bay on Wednesday night, but the show was canceled because of heavy rain and flooding. --It was a last minute decision that was made because a significant portion of the seating area was under over a foot of water. A ton of screaming fans . . . and parents that drove them . . . had already arrived, and had to be turned away. --NICK JONAS was at the venue . . . which, once again, is called the 1-800-ASK-GARY Amphitheatre (??????) . . . and posted a video of the flooding on Twitter. (--It's pretty bad. You can see for yourself in the video below. But be sure to lower the volume on your computer first . . . the screaming fans are DEAFENING . . .)
http://www.ustream.tv/recorded/9439226
--For now, there are no plans to reschedule the show, since it was the "fault" of the venue and not the Jonas Brothers. (--Refunds have been made available.) --But the REAL question here is: Was it really the fault of the venue . . . or was this GOD'S doing . . . as a way of punishing JOE JONAS for taking off his purity ring??? --This week, "Life & Style" reported that Joe is no longer saving himself for marriage, and is basically living in sin with his girlfriend, "Twilight" minx ASHLEY GREENE.


JUSTIN BIEBER ALMOST GOT IN TROUBLE FOR THROWING A WATER BALLOON AT A COP'S CROTCH:

JUSTIN BIEBER can get away with a TON of stuff REGULAR 16-year-olds can't . . . and now, there's something new to add to that list: Throwing water balloons at cops' CROTCHES. (!!!) -Yes, it did happen . . . although he almost DIDN'T get away with it. --Justin was throwing water balloons around backstage before his concert at the Maryland State Fair last Sunday. Specifically, he was targeting the CROTCHES of some of his crew. --But then he made the ill-advised decision to target some Maryland state troopers, who were there for crowd control. Justin hit one of them in the stomach, but the balloon didn't break. He hit the other in the belt, and it broke . . . soaking his crotch. --Supposedly, the cop was NOT happy about it . . . so Justin ended his balloon-throwing, and went back to his trailer. Meanwhile, Justin's bodyguard smoothed everything over with the cop. --A Maryland state police spokesperson said Justin's behavior was, quote, "inappropriate" . . . but said that the officer did not file a report, so no action will be taken against Justin. --If there WAS any chance of repercussions, it doesn't sound like Justin took it that seriously. After the show, he Tweeted, quote, "Still laughing. GREAT DAY."


"BILLBOARD'S" TOP 10 SONGS OF THE SUMMER:

"Billboard" has put out a list of the Top 10 Songs of the Summer . . . and unless you were cryogenically frozen for the past three months . . . it can't be surprising that KATY PERRY'S "California Gurls" came in at #1.

--Here's the Top 10:

#1.) "California Gurls", KATY PERRY . . . featuring SNOOP DOGG
#2.) "Love the Way You Lie", EMINEM . . . featuring RIHANNA
#3.) "Airplanes", B.O.B . . . featuring HAYLEY WILLIAMS
#4.) "OMG", USHER . . . featuring WILL.I.AM
#5.) "Dynamite", TAIO CRUZ
#6.) "Billionaire", TRAVIE MCCOY . . . featuring BRUNO MARS
#7.) "Cooler Than Me", MIKE POSNER
#8.) "I Like It", ENRIQUE IGLESIAS . . . featuring PITBULL
#9.) "Find Your Love", DRAKE
#10.) "Not Afraid", EMINEM


CHRIS BROWN'S MOTHER HAS APOLOGIZED FOR HER CONTROVERSIAL TWEET ABOUT CHRIS AND MICHAEL JACKSON:

CHRIS BROWN'S mother, Joyce Hawkins, has apologized for a "controversial" comment she made Wednesday on Twitter. --Joyce said . . . using all caps . . . quote, "MICHAEL JACKSON DIED SO THAT CHRIS BROWN COULD LIVE!!!" Clearly, whatever she was TRYING to say wasn't coming across, and some people flipped out at her for saying it. --Well, yesterday Joyce deleted the message . . . apologized . . . and attempted to explain what she meant. In a new Tweet, she said that she meant, quote, "Chris would carry on Michael's legacy." --And she told "USA Today", quote, "I'm so sorry that the Tweet I sent was misunderstood. What I meant to say is that Chris has always been inspired by Michael Jackson's music and his career." (--Uh . . . was anyone getting that???)


JAY-Z HAS SIGNED NINE-YEAR-OLD WILLOW SMITH TO A RECORD DEAL:

WILL and JADA PINKETT SMITH are now the proud parents of TWO child stars . . . and both of them are YOUNGER than JUSTIN BIEBER. --First 12-year-old JADEN starred in the new "Karate Kid" movie . . . and now JAY-Z has signed nine-year-old WILLOW to a record deal on his Roc Nation label. --This comes just TWO DAYS after Willow's debut song, "Whip My Hair", leaked online, and blazed its way through the Internet. --In a radio interview yesterday . . . (--with Ryan Seacrest) . . . Jay-Z said he knew "Whip My Hair" and its singer were GOLD the moment he heard the song. --He said, quote, "I was like, 'Man, that record's a smash.' And then [my Roc Nation partner] Jay Brown said, 'She's 9,' and I was like, 'Whoa!' And [then] he was like, 'She's Will and Jada's daughter,' and I was like, 'Whoa!' and it just went from there." --Jay-Z said he was immediately impressed with Willow the minute he met her. -He explained, quote, "She walked in and the first thing she said was, 'I'm really nervous,' and I thought, 'That's maturity to explain exactly how she was feeling when she walked right into the room.' I knew right then she was a star." (??? (--Wow, for real? Jay-Z sounds like a FASCINATING talent evaluator!!! Is there still a seat open at the "American Idol" judges' table???) --Jay-Z also said he doesn't want to get too carried away yet, but he thinks Willow could be the next . . . MICHAEL JACKSON. --He said, quote, "I don't want to go so far, but I can imagine that's how [Michael] was as a young kid . . . he knew exactly what he wanted. --"I believe that you have to start somewhere, and when you have that sort of talent and vision, there's no such thing as too young. --"Again, I heard the record without knowing who it was . . . we all danced to Michael Jackson records when he was eight [years old]. Stevie Wonder started at eight . . . it's just what it is, who she is."


T.I. NOW HAS A BIGGER PROBLEM THAN POTENTIALLY RETURNING TO PRISON . . . ASSUMING YOU RECOGNIZE THE LACK OF DEODORANT AS A BIG PROBLEM:

T.I. is in limbo as he waits to find out how his recent arrest for allegedly possessing ECSTASY will impact his probation status. --There's a very real chance that his probation could be revoked, and he'll be sent back to prison. But T.I. has a bigger problem than that right now . . . that's assuming you recognize the lack of deodorant as a big problem. --T.I. signed a deal to promote AXE body spray earlier this year . . . after promising the company that he was, quote, "working to become a more positive role model." --Well, getting arrested for suspicion of drug possession wasn't part of AXE's interpretation of being "a more positive role model" . . . so they're thinking about dumping T.I. But they haven't made a decision yet. --A rep for AXE released a statement saying, quote, "We are troubled by this arrest. In order to preserve the legal process, AXE will comment at a later time, as appropriate. In the meantime, we are reviewing our promotional activities."
(--As of last night, T.I. was still prominently featured on the AXE site, here . . .)
http://www.theaxeeffect.com/

NAZZY’S RANDOM STUFF

A WOMAN'S RANDOM ACT OF KINDNESS AT A GROCERY STORE TURNS INTO $100,000 FOR CHARITY:

Last summer, Carolee Hazard of Menlo Park, California, was in line to buy groceries at Trader Joe's. The woman in front of her was named Jenni Ware, and Jenni had forgotten her wallet. --So Carolee decided to help Jenni out . . . even though she was a total stranger . . . and paid for all $207 of Jenni's groceries. --The next day, Jenni paid Carolee back . . . but gave her $300, or $93 more than Carolee had spent on her. So Carolee went to Facebook and asked her friends what she should do with the extra money. --Some people suggested charity, and Carolee liked that. So she decided to match the $93 with $93 of her own, and donated $186 to the local Second Harvest Food Bank. She told her Facebook friends that was her plan.--And then . . . they sprang into action. One friend decided to match the $93. Then another. Then another. People started reposting what was happening to THEIR friends on Facebook. That led to more people donating.
--Within a year, Carolee's "93 Dollar Club" had raised more than $100,000 to donate to the food bank. --Now, she's going to push to raise $200,000. Quote, "That amount will provide 400,000 meals or enough to feed 100 families of four for a year." (Shine by Yahoo)


HIGHWAY DEATHS ARE AT THEIR LOWEST POINT SINCE 1950:

I don't know about you, but most of the time I feel like everyone else on the road is a complete LUNATIC who should have their license revoked for the good of mankind. But according to some new statistics, it's not QUITE that bad. --The U.S. Department of Transportation just released the numbers on highway traffic deaths for 2009. And it turns out our roads are the safest they've been in SIXTY years. --There were 33,808 traffic deaths last year. That's the lowest number since 1950 . . . when people were driving Studebakers to the soda shop for a malt and some necking. --And, since we drive a lot more now than we did in 1950 . . . in terms of the number of drivers and how much we're in our cars . . . the rate of deaths per the number of miles driven has hit an all-time low.

--There were 1.13 deaths per 100 million miles in 2009, the lowest of all time.

--Auto safety experts say there are FOUR main reasons traffic fatalities are at an all-time low:

#1.) More people than ever are using seatbelts.

#2.) Side air bags, anti-rollover technology, and other advances in safety.

#3.) States are more focused on stopping drunk drivers.

#4.) The economy is keeping more people home on the weekends instead of out drinking. (ABC News)


CHECK OUT THE FIVE THINGS PARENTS WORRY ABOUT THE MOST . . . AND THE FIVE THINGS THEY ACTUALLY *SHOULD* WORRY ABOUT:

Christie Barnes is the author of a book called "The Paranoid Parents Guide", and she asked tons of parents what their biggest worries are. Then, she compared their top five worries to the top five ways kids are ACTUALLY hurt or killed. --Here's what she found: The five things parents worry about the most are COMPLETELY different than the five biggest dangers to children. --The five things parents worry about the most are: Kidnapping . . . school shootings . . . terrorists . . . dangerous strangers . . . and drugs. --And the five things most responsible for children being hurt or killed are: Car accidents . . . homicide, almost always by a person who knows the child and not a stranger . . . abuse . . . suicide . . . and drowning. --Christie says the divide is because the news focuses on the rare events that FREAK parents out. So a kidnapping will be the top story on the news . . . but a child dying in a car crash probably wouldn't even make the broadcast. --She says, quote, "I'd love it if every news story came with a little warning at the bottom that said, 'Even though this is very tragic, this [only has] a one in 10 million, one in a million or one in 20 [chance of happening]." --In her research, she found the BEST thing you can do to keep your kids safe is to make them wear helmets when they bike and skateboard, and make them wear seatbelts in the car. --That'll cut down on your kid's chance of dying by 90% and of getting seriously hurt by 78%. (NPR)


HERE ARE YOUR ODDS OF DYING FROM CANCER, LIGHTNING, A PLANE CRASH, AND OTHER THINGS:

--Heart disease: 1 in 6.

--Cancer: 1 in 7.

--Stroke: 1 in 28.

--Car accident: 1 in 85.

--Suicide: 1 in 115.

--Accidentally being exposed to toxic substances or poison: 1 in 139.

--Falling: 1 in 184.

--Getting shot: 1 in 300.

--Drowning: 1 in 1,073.

--Plane crash: 1 in 5,862. (--This figure made plane crashes seem a bit too common to us, but when you consider that it involves all types of aviation, not just commercial airliners, it makes more sense.)

--Contact with hornets, wasps or bees: 1 in 62,950.

--Struck by lightning: 1 in 81,701.

--Earthquake: 1 in 153,597.

--Getting possessed by Satan: 1 in 537,212. (--That's based on the current rate of about 37,500 exorcisms being performed annually in the U.S.) (NSC / "Life: The Odds" by Gregory Baer)


CHEFS NEVER ORDER PASTA OR CHICKEN AT A RESTAURANT, THEY LOVE WENDY'S . . . AND FIVE OTHER SECRETS THEY'LL NEVER TELL YOU:

"Food Network Magazine" just published the results of an anonymous survey of top chefs all over the U.S. Top chefs meaning really good, high-profile chefs, not contestants on the reality show. Here are some secrets they found . . .

#1.) Chefs will almost never order chicken or pasta when they're eating out. Those are usually the most overpriced and least interesting items on the menu.

#2.) Chefs eat fast food. In fact, the most popular fast food chain among gourmet chefs is . . . Wendy's.

#3.) Vegetarian doesn't always mean vegetarian. 15% of the chefs surveyed said that their vegetarian dishes aren't always perfectly meat-free, and might be cooked in chicken stock or use some beef fat or something.

#4.) Chefs are more impressed by food critics than celebrities or randy customers. 71% of chefs give special treatment to critics . . . 63% give it to celebrities . . . and more than half have seen patrons getting-it-on in the bathroom.

#5.) Kitchens are clean, but do have roaches. 75% of chefs say they've seen a roach in the kitchen . . . but 85% rated their kitchens an eight out of 10 or higher for cleanliness.

#6.) They aren't making a fortune. 65% of chefs make less than $75,000-a-year.

#7.) More chefs prescribe to the five-second rule than you'd want. 25% of the chefs, or one out of four, say they've cooked food that fell on the floor. (Yahoo)


THREE OUT OF FIVE YOUNG ADULTS HAVE NO IDEA WHO COLONEL SANDERS IS:

Look, I understand that today's young people don't know their history very well. They think Samuel Adams is a beer and "Nazi" is just a generic term to describe anyone who's mean to you. It's fine. They're lazy. We get it. --But THIS lack of knowledge is just shocking and appalling. According to a new survey by KFC, more than 60% of people aged 18 to 25 have no idea who the guy is in the KFC logo. That's right: They don't recognize COLONEL SANDERS. --When KFC asked the 18-to-25-year-olds direct questions about Colonel Sanders, 30% had never heard of him and 50% thought he was a made-up icon like Mr. Peanut. --In case you're one of the people who don't know, KFC was founded by COLONEL HARLAND SANDERS. And yes, he did have white hair, a white beard, a white suit, black glasses, and a string tie. --He developed his recipe for fried chicken around age 40, franchised his restaurants at age 65, and sold his company at age 74. He died at age 90 . . . and he would've turned 120 years old yesterday. --KFC has started a new marketing push to get young people informed about the Colonel, because they say, quote, "They didn't get to see and experience him like other generations did. We celebrate the fact that our founder was a real person." (USA Today)


HERE ARE EIGHT THINGS EMPLOYERS AREN'T ALLOWED TO ASK YOU DURING A JOB INTERVIEW:

Investopedia put together this list of eight questions that are TOTALLY out-of-bounds in a job interview. So remember them . . . because if an employer asks you one and doesn't hire you, at least you can make some money by suing them, right?

#1.) How old are you? They can only ask if you're over 18. Any other questions fall under the Age Discrimination in Employment Act of 1967.

#2.) Are you married? They can't even try to figure it out by asking "Do you prefer Mrs. or Miss?"

#3.) Are you a U.S. citizen? They can't find out your citizenship status until after they hire you and have you complete an Employment Eligibility Verification form.

#4.) Do you have any disabilities?

#5.) Do you take drugs, smoke or drink? Whether they're trying to figure out if you're a health risk . . . or if you'd be a fun time at happy hour . . . these questions are out-of-bounds.

#6.) What religion do you practice?

#7.) What is your race?

#8.) Are you pregnant? (Yahoo Finance)


A WOMAN CAUGHT SHOPLIFTING AT WAL-MART SWINGS HER BABY CARRIER . . . WITH THE BABY IN IT . . . AT OFFICERS:

Shoplifting when you've got a newborn baby with you is a bad decision. You want to know how to make it exponentially worse? Do what this woman did. --On Wednesday, 28-year-old Billie Goode of New Hartford, New York, was at Wal-Mart with two friends and her three-week-old daughter. And Billie and her friends decided to shoplift more than $1,100 in merchandise. --But Wal-Mart's loss prevention officers spotted them and stopped the women as they tried to leave the store. And that's when Billie made things much, much worse. --To try to escape, she repeatedly swung her handheld baby carrier at the officers . . . with her three-week-old STILL IN IT. --One of the friends with her, 25-year-old Tayonda Durham, sprayed pepper spray at the officers while the third friend, 29-year-old Harlyn McBean, pulled up her 2005 Chevrolet Impala. --Between the swinging baby and the pepper spray, the women were all able to hop in the Impala and drive off. --The Wal-Mart officers called the real police officers with the license plate, and the cops were able to track down the car a few minutes later. --Besides the theft charges, Billie was charged with endangering the welfare of a child. (Syracuse Post Dispatch)


ARE YOU ALWAYS PUNCHING PEOPLE? TRY GROWING YOUR NAILS EXTRA LONG TO STOP YOURSELF:

If you're the kind of person who's always getting into fistfights, here's a strategy to stop. And no, we won't recommend anger management or self-control. Come on. --41-year-old Wen Jian of the Fujian province of China has a solution that he used to stop himself from fighting: Never, ever cutting his nails. --Wen says, quote, "When I was young, I was very bad tempered. I was very aggressive and always getting into trouble. I decided to grow my nails" . . . because that way, he couldn't close his fist. (--Sure, he could scratch the hell out of someone, but that's not how MEN fight.) --His nails are all now incredibly long . . . his longest is 14 inches . . . and he has to sleep with his left hand in a shoebox to keep them from breaking. (Weird Asia News)


IS GETTING A GAP PUT IN YOUR TEETH *REALLY* THE NEW TREND?

If this is really a trend, why the hell did I suffer through braces when I was a kid? According to an article in the "Wall Street Journal", the newest trend is having a GAP put in between your front teeth like ANNA PAQUIN from "True Blood" or MADONNA. --Different fashion experts have theories on the trend. Some think people just want to look different to stand out . . . some think it's an "ugly" backlash against airbrushing in photos . . . and some think it's part of people wanting to look raw and authentic. (WSJ)


NAZZY’S SILLY VIDEOS OF THE DAY


#1.) HERE'S A CRAZY EYEWITNESS . . . AUTO-TUNED:

Last week, a woman in Kansas City, Missouri, gave a reporter a ridiculous eyewitness account of a robbery. And now the YouTube series "Auto-Tune The News" has turned it into a song called "Backin' Up".
(--Search for "Auto-Tune The News Backin Up." The song starts at :08. Here's the Auto-Tuned version and the original.)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qIoG4PlEPtY

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vcpx8O82KLM


#2.) IS THIS THE MOST RIDICULOUS CAMPAIGN SPEECH OF THE YEAR?

A Republican named PHIL DAVIDSON is running for the position of Treasurer in Stark County, Ohio, and on Wednesday night he gave a completely over-the-top speech. --This was the third try for Davidson, and for the third time, he DIDN'T get nominated . . . probably because he sounded more like a pro-wrestler than a politician. (--Search for "Phil Davidson treasurer speech.")

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UhV5RgcNJjE


#3.) AND NOW . . . A BABY CHIMP RIDING A BABY PIG:

There's a new video online of a baby chimp riding a baby pig. And the piglet doesn't just walk around . . . it sprints. It seems like the chimp thinks the pig is its mother, because it falls off about halfway through and freaks out.
(--Search for "baby monkey rides piglet." The monkey falls off at :41, and the pig goes through a fence at 1:23.)
http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1941010


#4.) WANNA SEE LITTLE KIDS RE-ENACT "KEEPING UP WITH THE KARDASHIANS"?

I know exactly what you're thinking this Friday: "Something's been missing from my week, but I can't quite put my finger on it." --Luckily we're here to help out. Because we know what that missing piece is: A video of little children reenacting the E! show "Keeping Up With The Kardashians". You're welcome.

(--Search for "Kids Reenact: E!'s "Keeping Up With The Kardashians".)

http://www.babelgum.com/6002120


THREE THINGS YOU SHOULD BUY AT TARGET . . . AND THREE THINGS YOU SHOULDN'T:

Yahoo's finance site has a list of things you should and shouldn't buy at Target. Here are the top three in each category. --First, here are the three things you SHOULDN'T buy at Target . . .

#1.) FURNITURE. According to Yahoo, the stuff at Ikea is usually cheaper and more stylish. Their bookshelves, chairs, and kitchen tables are better quality than what you'll find at Target.

#2.) MOVIES, MUSIC, AND BOOKS. Target can't beat the prices at Wal-Mart or Amazon.com. For example, the new KATY PERRY album sells for $13.99 at Target, but you can get it for $9 at Wal-Mart or $9.99 at Amazon.

#3.) EXERCISE EQUIPMENT. Most of what they sell at Target is the kind of stuff you see in late-night infomercials. If you already bought exercise equipment at Target, you might as well keep using it. --But if you're looking for NEW exercise equipment, you're better off going to a sporting goods store and spending a little extra.

--And now, three things you SHOULD buy at Target . . .

#1.) GREEN CLEANING PRODUCTS. Target has over 70 different kinds, which is way more than you'll find at the grocery store or Wal-Mart.

#2.) MAKE-UP. Target used to just carry cheap stuff, but they recently started getting more designer cosmetics. And it's actually a good place for some of the hard-to-find international brands.

#3.) GROCERIES. Target is trying to bounce back from the recession by expanding their selection of groceries and including meat, fruit, fresh produce, and baked goods.

--According to one research analyst, most Target stores now have about 70% of the stuff you'd find at a normal grocery store, but it costs about 10 to 20% less. (Yahoo.com)


THREE TIPS FOR DATING WHEN YOUR LIFE IS CONSUMED BY WORK:

If your job has a tendency to consume your life, getting out there and dating can become an afterthought. And the next thing you know, your sex life consists of whipping your junk out on Chatroulette. Or you're surrounded by cats. --So today, we've got three tips from Match.com to help you balance your professional life and your love life.

#1.) MAKE A PLAN. If you're always busy, you've got to use the little time you DO have wisely. So make a plan for meeting someone you'd be compatible with. --This could be anything from taking a new exercise class at your gym, to volunteering with an organization you're passionate about. That way, you increase your chance of finding someone with similar interests, AND you're doing something you like.

#2.) LEARN TO SAY NO. Instead of taking on new work projects all the time, look for opportunities where you can realistically turn them down. You don't want to say no TOO often, but every once in a while, you need to take some time out for yourself.

#3.) DON'T STOP MOVING. Most people get into a routine of heading straight home after work, parking their butt in front of the TV, and zoning out for the rest of the night. But obviously you'll never meet anyone new that way. -So, make a point of going out after work a couple times a week, whether it's happy hour with co-workers, or dinner with your friends. That way you get out of the house, and it gives you something to look forward to when you're stuck in the daily grind. --Plus, you might meet someone new. Which is the whole point in the first place. (Match.com)


SITE FOR SORE EYES:

www.SniqueAway.com

The folks at Smarter Travel/Trip Advisor have launched a new online booking site that allows you to reserve A-list hotels and resorts at discount rates – by invitation only. Luxury hotels don’t like to advertise low rates because they think it cheapens their image. All hotels featured on SniqueAway have earned a minimum four-star rating classification and a minimum four out of five TripAdvisor review rating. On SniqueAway, TripAdvisor hotel reviews are shown alongside members-only offers, providing trusted traveler opinions of the hotels. Anyone who registers is invited – and don’t worry – it’s free.


LIFESTYLES:

Top 2010 Summer Songs

Katy Perry’s “California Gurls” featuring Snoop Dogg tops Billboard’s Songs of Summer 2010 survey, giving the singer her second Songs of Summer chart champion thanks to 2008’s “I Kissed a Girl.” Perry is only the second artist with two top placements as a lead act in the last 25 years. Mariah Carey won in 1990 with “Vision of Love” and 2005 with “We Belong Together.” Jay-Z has sat atop two Songs of Summer charts as a featured artist, on Beyoncé’s “Crazy in Love” (2003) and Rihanna’s “Umbrella” (2007). Perry is also the only artist to rank on the last three Songs of Summer countdowns. In addition to leading the list this year and in 2008, she placed at No. 10 last year with “Waking Up in Vegas.” The top 10 Songs of Summer 2010:

1. “California Gurls” – Katy Perry featuring Snoop Dogg
2. “Love the Way You Lie” Eminem featuring Rihanna
3. “Airplanes” – B.o.B’s featuring Hayley Williams
4. “OMG” – Usher featuring Pitbull
5. “Dynamite” – Taio Cruz
6. “Billionaire” – Travie McCoy featuring Bruno Mars
7. “Cooler Than Me” – Mike Posner
8. “I Like It” – Enrique Iglesias featuring Pitbull
9. “Find Your Love” – Drake
10. “Not Afraid” – Eminem



Soles4Souls Running Out Of Shoes

Soles4Souls, the shoe charity that gives away free shoes to people in need, is running out of shoes. The non-profit organization has responded aggressively to the many natural disasters around the world and has nearly depleted its stock of both new and gently worn shoes. Wayne Elsey, Founder and CEO of the charity, is sending out a plea for help. Elsey said supporters can create their own neighborhood shoe drives, network with their friends (school, church, gym, or Facebook) to create a community event, or simply clean out their own closet and send the shoes to the closest collection point; locations are listed at www.giveshoes.org. Soles4Souls does not throw out any footwear it receives. If any donated shoes are unusable, the charity recycles the footwear into materials used for playgrounds, insulation and other uses.



Best Online Gaming Food

What you eat while playing online can make a big difference, according to Casino.com. Eating Buffalo wings or sloppy Joes while you click on your mouse can get pretty messy. Finger foods like sandwiches or sushi are a popular choice, but still a favorite. Casino.com asked their players to list the top five stay-at-home gaming foods. The No. 1 choice was pizza. Surprisingly, instant noodles came in second, followed by potato chips, beer and chicken nuggets.
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What Would You Ditch To Watch The Big Game?

The 2010 Dave & Buster’s College Football Survey reveals that nearly half of respondents would skip out on date night to watch their team play. But playing hooky didn’t stop there – nearly half would miss work, while 17% would ditch a family wedding! The survey also revealed:

· In order to watch every game without hassle from friends and family, more than half of Americans would sacrifice their morning cup of coffee.
· One out of four people confessed they would ditch a friend’s birthday party to watch the game.



Which TV Boss Do You Work For?

In honor of Monday’s Employee/Boss Exchange Day, a new survey has found the boss and employee relationship can be a complex partnership. According to a new CareerBuilder survey, nearly one-third (31%) said they feel they can do the job of their boss better, while 60% said they don’t feel that their boss could do their job. The survey also asked which TV show boss reminds them most of their own, good or bad. The top 10 include:

· Jacob from “Lost” – You’re never really sure where he is, what he wants and what he has in store for you.
· Judge Judy from “Judge Judy” – No nonsense and fair when making decisions.
· MacGyver from “MacGyver” – Resourceful and can fix any situation.
· Jack Donaghy from “30 Rock” – Likeable and a corporate guy through and through.
· Oprah Winfrey from “Oprah” – Very influential and informative.
· Simon Cowell from “American Idol” – Judgmental and insulting.
· MacGruber from “Saturday Night Live” – Terrible with managing projects and deadlines.
· Michael Scott from “The Office” – Bumbling and idiotic.
· Leslie Knope from “Parks and Recreation” – Believes her job is more important than it probably is.
· Donald Trump from “The Apprentice” – Demanding and powerful.

IS KAT VON D PREGNANT???

This would REALLY be a slap in SANDRA BULLOCK'S face . . . but luckily, it comes from "Us Weekly", so it's probably not true . . . --So-called "sources" are starting to wonder if KAT VON D is pregnant with JESSE JAMES' baby. --Supposedly, she's been showing a slight belly-bump lately . . . (--although not in any pictures I've seen) . . . and people are wondering if that's why Kat and Jesse came out so suddenly and so enthusiastically about their relationship.


MIKE TYSON'S WIFE IS PREGNANT:

MIKE TYSON'S wife Lakiha Spicer is five months pregnant with what will be Mike's EIGHTH child. It'll be Mike and Lakiha's second. They already have a 21-month-old daughter, although they've only been married for a little over a year. --They made The Big Mistake just 10 days after Mike lost his 4-year-old daughter Exodus last May. Exodus accidentally hanged herself with the power cord from a treadmill while in the care of her mother, who was an ex-girlfriend of Mike's. --Several months ago, Tyson revealed on "The View" that, quote, "I'm totally destitute and broke. But I have an awesome life."


DID JOE JONAS TAKE OFF HIS PURITY RING???

--"Life & Style" magazine claims that JOE JONAS is NO LONGER WEARING HIS PURITY RING. (!!!) --I shouldn't have to spell out for you what that means, but I will: It means that Joe MAY NO LONGER BE SAVING HIMSELF FOR MARRIAGE. --As your daughters all know, Joe . . . who's 21 years old . . . is dating "Twilight" minx ASHLEY GREENE. (--She's 23.) And a so-called "source" says, quote, "When they're not traveling, they're basically living together."


KATIE HOLMES WON'T HAVE ANOTHER BABY FOR A FEW YEARS, IF AT ALL:

Suri Cruise may never have a baby brother or sister. In the new issue of "Marie Claire" magazine, KATIE HOLMES admits she's not thinking about having another kid. --She says, quote, "Maybe in a couple of years, but right now I want to make sure I'm really there for Suri. I'm the youngest in my family . . . my closest sister is five years older than me, and the next one is nine years ahead of me. --"So I was a bit of an only child, and I liked it! I liked having all of my mom's attention, and sometimes I think I still do." (--Suri is 4 years old.)


HAS JIM PARSONS FROM "THE BIG BANG THEORY" BEEN OUTED?

The "National Enquirer" is outing JIM PARSONS . . . who plays Sheldon Cooper on "The Big Bang Theory". --They claim that right after Jim won the Emmy for Lead Actor in Comedy, he walked offstage and proposed to his partner . . . an art director named Todd Spiewak. And Todd said yes. --According to the "Enquirer", they're making The Big Same-Sex Mistake around Christmastime in Massachusetts. --In his acceptance speech, Jim DID mention Todd Spiewak. But he buried his name among a bunch of others toward the end, and made no mention of him being a boyfriend. Check it out here . . .)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-8KJ7bqctZ0


A NEW LAWSUIT CALLS BRITNEY SPEARS A SEXUAL HARASSER AND A CHILD-ABUSER:

A former bodyguard is suing BRITNEY SPEARS for sexual harassment . . . and he also accuses her of abusing her own children. --Fernando Flores claims that Britney was constantly throwing herself at him, and making sure he saw her in revealing and / or see-through clothing. --And he claims that on two separate occasions, Britney sent him on errands . . . and made sure that when he returned, he saw her, quote, "having vigorous sexual relations." --She also pulled the CLASSIC move where she'd summon him for some reason, and when he showed up, she'd be NAKED. --Britney didn't much care if the kids knew mommy was having sex. Flores says that one time when she was staying at a hotel in California, Britney was, quote, "loudly having sexual relations while her two children were in the suite with her."
(--It's not clear if the kids SAW anything, or were even in the same room. The lawsuit doesn't specify that.)
--Flores also claims that Britney once took his belt and whipped her son Sean Preston with it . . . which left Flores, quote, "shocked, horrified and deeply disturbed." --In another bizarre incident, Britney allegedly fed her sons crabmeat . . . even though they have SEAFOOD ALLERGIES. --And when the boys started throwing up, Britney refused to let Flores or the nanny help them. In fact, she told them, quote, "Mind your own (effing) business!" --Flores also says that Britney once told the kids, quote, "Mommy is white trash." --It should be noted that Flores reported all of this to the L.A. County Department of Children and Family Services. They investigated and decided his claims had NO MERIT.(--If you're interested, you can read the lawsuit here . . .)
http://images.eonline.com/static/news/pdf/spearsbodyguard.pdf


DID VINCE NEIL ASSAULT A WOMAN IN AN ELEVATOR???

MOTLEY CRUE singer VINCE NEIL is already facing a DUI charge in which he was allegedly almost THREE TIMES over the legal limit. And now this . . . --TMZ says that Vince has been accused of shoving a woman in an elevator at the Las Vegas Hilton on Sunday night. Police are investigating, but no charges have been filed yet.


JANE FONDA RECENTLY HAD PLASTIC SURGERY:

Because she's so closely associated with her exercise videos, JANE FONDA will never be able to have plastic surgery without the universe damn-near collapsing in on itself. --And that's happening right now, because Jane is admitting that she's had some work done. --She tells "Entertainment Tonight", quote, "I recently had plastic surgery. It was a hard decision to make, and I decided if I'm going to do it, I'm going to tell the truth. --"I'm writing a book about aging, so I can't write that book and not say I've had plastic surgery. And you know, I just decided it was for me . . . I don't want to have bags under my eyes that make me look tired, and so forth and so on." (--Here's video . . .) http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2010/09/08/jane-fonda-talks-about-he_n_708781.html


JOHNNY DEPP IS HOLLYWOOD'S HIGHEST-PAID ACTOR:

"Forbes" magazine has released its annual list of Hollywood's Highest-Paid Actors. And sitting in the top spot is JOHNNY DEPP. --Between June of 2009 and June of 2010 . . . (--"Forbes" always uses the June-to-June time frame, for whatever reason) . . . Johnny earned an unbelievable $75 MILLION. --A lot of that money came from "Alice In Wonderland", which has grossed more than $1 BILLION worldwide. He also got a nice advance for the upcoming flick "The Tourist", which co-stars ANGELINA JOLIE.

--BEN STILLER came in second with $53 million, thanks to the "Night at the Museum" sequel and the upcoming, third flick in the "Meet the Parents" series, "Little Fockers".

--And TOM HANKS is third with $45 million. A lot of his cash came from the "Da Vinci Code" sequel, "Angels & Demons".

#1.) JOHNNY DEPP, $75 million

#2.) BEN STILLER, $53 million

#3.) TOM HANKS, $45 million

#4.) ADAM SANDLER, $40 million

#5.) LEONARDO DICAPRIO, $28 million

#6.) DANIEL RADCLIFFE, $25 million

#7.) (tie) ROBERT DOWNEY JR. and TOM CRUISE, $22 million

#9.) BRAD PITT, $20 million

#10.) GEORGE CLOONEY, $19 million

(--If you want to know how these guys made all this money, hit up the following link and check out the slideshow . . .)
http://www.forbes.com/2010/09/08/depp-stiller-hanks-sandler-business-entertainment-highest-paid-actors_slide_2.html


"RUDY"-GATE!!!

JOE MONTANA BUSTS SOME OF THE MYTHS SURROUNDING THE MOVIE "RUDY":

Ask 10 guys what they think is the most inspirational sports movie of all time, and nine of them will say "Rudy" . . . the 1993 movie about Rudy Ruettiger . . . the little Notre Dame football player who could. --The emotional climax of the film has Rudy . . . played by SEAN ASTIN . . . finally getting onto the field during his last home game, because the rest of the team refuses to play unless he's allowed in the game. --With the crowd chanting "Rudy! Rudy! Rudy!", Rudy gets a SACK to end the game, and is carried off the field on his teammates' shoulders. (--Here's that classic scene . . .) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mZ7ZpLgkVxA --Well, if that scene never fails to bring a tear to your eye, prepare to have your bubble burst by NFL legend JOE MONTANA. --Joe was on that Notre Dame team with Rudy back in 1975, and he says things didn't quite happen the way they were depicted in the movie. --Montana was on "The Dan Patrick Show" on DirecTV yesterday morning, and when Dan asked him about "Rudy", Joe sighed as if he's tired of hearing about it. And he said, quote, "It's a movie remember . . . not all that's true." --Then he went on to dispel some of the myths that the movie created. For instance, none of the other players DEMANDED that Rudy get playing time. --Joe said it was already set up that all the seniors would get to play in that last home game. And the crowd WASN'T chanting Rudy's name. --He said, quote, "The crowd wasn't chanting . . . nobody threw in their jerseys." --Rudy DID get a sack, and he WAS carried off the field. But Joe says the guys who carried him were, quote, "kinda playin' around . . . I won't say as a joke, but playing around." --Joe added, quote, "He worked his butt off to get where he was and to do the things he did, but not any harder than anybody else." (--You can listen to Joe's comments here . . .)
http://tmz.vo.llnwd.net/o28/newsdesk/tmz_audio/090810_joe_montana_audio_v3.mp3
--E! Online tried to get a comment from the real Rudy Ruettiger . . . but he just referred them to the FAQ section of his website. (--Which you can find here . . .) http://www.rudyint.com/truestory1.cfm


STEPHEN KING'S "DARK TOWER" SERIES IS FINALLY BEING ADAPTED FOR BOTH THE BIG AND SMALL SCREENS:

Almost 30 years after the first book was released, STEPHEN KING'S "Dark Tower" series is FINALLY being adapted . . . for both the big AND small screens. --NBC Universal is making THREE movies and a TV series based on the franchise that began with the publication of the novel "The Gunslinger" in 1982. --RON HOWARD will direct the first movie and the first season of the show. --Here's how it's going to work . . . The first movie will come out first . . . followed by the premiere of the TV series, which will act as a "bridge" to the second movie. --After the second movie, the series will show the adventures of the lead character, The Gunslinger, as a young man. This will act as a "bridge" to the third movie. And the plan is for the series to continue beyond that third film.--There's no word when we can expect any of this to be completed. (--The "Dark Tower" series is way too complex to describe here. It's kind of like a post-apocalyptic Western with time portals and other such sci-fi weirdness. You can read more about it here . . .)
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Dark_Tower_%28series%29


YOU CAN WIN A VISIT TO THE "BREAKING DAWN" SET . . . BUT YOU'LL HAVE TO BE PRETTY RICH:

If you love "Twilight" and your daddy's rich, I've got something you might be interested in . . . --It's a visit to the Vancouver set of "Breaking Dawn". It's being auctioned off on eBay, with the proceeds going to the Stand Up for Cancer charity. --The auction doesn't end until September 17th, and the price is already out of most people's range. Last we checked, there had been 58 bids, and it was going for $8,600. (--Check it out here . . .)
http://cgi.ebay.com/The-Twilight-Saga-Breaking-Dawn-Vancouver-Set-Visit-/250693380301?pt=Airline&hash=item3a5e7d68cd
--In other "Twilight" news, "Eclipse" is being re-released in select theaters TOMORROW, to celebrate the birthday of KRISTEN STEWART'S character, Bella Swan . . . which is September 13th. (--Tomorrow is the 10th, FYI.)
(--To see if it's playing at a theater near you, hit up this link . . .)
http://www.facebook.com/twilight?v=wall#!/twilight?v=app_10442206389


POSSIBLE DETAILS ON THE "GILLIGAN'S ISLAND" MOVIE:

There's a "Gilligan's Island" movie on the drawing board. And while nothing official has happened yet, the "National Enquirer" claims to have scored some details about the characters. (--Keep in mind, we have NO IDEA if any of this is true.) --They're SIMILAR to their TV counterparts, but not exactly the same. For instance, the Skipper and Gilligan have gone AWOL from the Coast Guard after running afoul of drug dealers. --Mary Ann spends much of the time "accidentally" getting caught NAKED by other characters. Meanwhile, the Professor is a PERVERT who's constantly chasing after her and Ginger. --And the Howells . . . Thurston and Lovey . . . are trying to, quote, "rekindle their romance after he's lost his job with a corrupt power company."


CLINT EASTWOOD COULD HAVE BEEN SUPERMAN *AND* JAMES BOND IF HE'D WANTED TO:

CLINT EASTWOOD can do anything. We know this. But would you have accepted him as Superman or James Bond? Because he was offered both parts back in the '70s, and he turned them down. --He didn't say why he opted out of "Superman". But he explained why he said no to Bond . . . quote, "I was offered pretty good money . . . This was after SEAN CONNERY left. My lawyer came and said, 'They would love to have you.' --"But to me, well, that was somebody else's gig. That's Sean's deal. It didn't feel right for me to be doing it."


SNOOKI GOT OFF EASY IN HER DISORDERLY CONDUCT CASE . . . AFTER FIRST BEING *BERATED* BY THE JUDGE:

"Jersey Shore" party animal SNOOKI was in court yesterday . . . answering to misdemeanor charges of disorderly conduct, being a public nuisance, and criminally annoying others. (--And no, that's not a joke. That's a real criminal charge.) --Snooki was arrested in Seaside Heights, New Jersey, back in July . . . during a marathon afternoon drinking session. She was looking at a maximum sentence of $3,200 in fines and 90 days in jail . . . but she got off easy. --But not before being BERATED by Judge DAMIAN MURRAY. It was a pretty amusing SLAM, especially considering it was doled out by a judge in a courtroom. Here it is, in its entirety: --He said, quote, "I have concerns about how much of this episode was scripted by your show . . . or how much was actions of your own initiative. I mean . . . if this was scripted, only you can determine if it's worth trading your dignity for a paycheck." --After Snooki told the judge it was NOT scripted, he went on, quote, "If this was your idea of having a good time, it appears that your recent celebrity has apparently affected your judgment in this matter. --"Seaside Heights is a town that invites people to have a good time. We're a tourism town. We want people to come down and have fun, but not at the expense of others." --And then he went in for the kill . . . quote, "Your actions . . . I don't know . . . you seem to be acting like a LINDSAY LOHAN wannabe. Going through life rude, profane, obnoxious and self-indulgent . . . it's not the way you want to live your life. --"And hopefully this incident will impress upon you that there are consequences to your actions." (--You can watch video of Judge Murray's lecture, here . . .)
http://www.tmz.com/videos?autoplay=true&mediaKey=8611373f-8459-451e-b22b-18b75fa2d5cd
-Snooki's lawyer admitted that she, quote, "interfered with the public's right to quiet enjoyment of the beach on this particular day . . . [with] some loud language." --But he chalked that up to a, quote, "bad day . . . an anomaly in an otherwise well-lived life." (???) --Snooki was slapped with a $533 fine . . . and two days of community service with local animal control. (--She received a one-day credit for recent charity work.) --Before being sentenced, Snooki said she was sorry. She told the court, quote, "I would definitely like to apologize to the Seaside cops. When I saw what happened and everyone told me what happened, I was very embarrassed. --"This was not like me and I've never been in this situation before." --And afterwards, she posted this on Twitter: Quote, "Ah never again! So scary . . . thank you judge for understanding, I'm very thankful for that! Whew . . . now I can breathe!" (--She actually spelled "breathe" as "breath," without the "e".) --Speaking of Snooki's Twitter . . . later yesterday afternoon she Tweeted, quote, "Ugh, stuck in Newark traffic is no fun. OMG why I got a stick shift I will never know. Stop and go traffic . . . I'm killin' myself here :(" --And LESS THAN AN HOUR LATER, the Mayor of Newark, New Jersey, CORY BOOKER . . . who was apparently hanging out on Twitter at the time . . . saw it, and responded, quote, "Snooki! I'm the mayor . . . --"Where R U . . . so I can give u a ticket 4 texting & driving. We need revenue!" (--Yes, that's the mayor of Newark responding to Snooki . . . on Twitter . . . using the super-professional-looking Twitter shorthand. Amazing.)


DID SUSAN BOYLE BACK OUT OF A PERFORMANCE ON "AMERICA'S GOT TALENT" . . . BECAUSE LOU REED HATES HER???

TMZ says SUSAN BOYLE was supposed to perform on "America's Got Talent" last night, but she bailed at the last minute because LOU REED hates her. -Here's the deal: Susan was going to perform Lou's song "Perfect Day", but for whatever reason, the show waited until the day of the performance to ask Lou for permission. And he promptly turned them down. --And TMZ claims he said no specifically because he's NOT a Susan Boyle fan. Anyway, Susan bagged on the show because she didn't have anything else prepared. (--TMZ adds that Susan burst into tears when she found out Lou Reed was blocking her performance . . . and continued crying all the way to the airport.)


"GLEE'S" MATTHEW MORRISON HAS AN ALBUM ON THE WAY:

MATTHEW MORRISON . . . who plays Mr. Schuester on "Glee" . . . is currently working on his debut album, which he's hoping to have out by February. --He says he's "about three-quarters of the way done with [it]" . . . and describes the sound as a mix of adult contemporary and stuff you can, quote, "hear in the club and you can dance to." He also says he's hoping to tour at some point. (--Matthew collaborated with 'N SYNC stud JC CHASEZ on a track called "Dancing in the Rain" . . . but it's unclear if JC will actually sing on it, or if they just wrote it together.)


CNN HAS FINALLY CONFIRMED THAT PIERS MORGAN WILL TAKE OVER FOR LARRY KING:

It's official: "America's Got Talent" judge PIERS MORGAN . . . the British one . . . will take over for LARRY KING after he ends his show in November. --There's been talk about Piers replacing Larry for MONTHS, but CNN has only just now confirmed it. Piers' show, which is still untitled at this point, will premiere in Larry's 9:00 P.M. timeslot in January. The concept seems similar to "Larry King Live". --As far as we know, this will not impact his gig on "America's Got Talent". --The terms of Piers' contract have not been released . . . but two months ago, the "New York Post" reported that he was "on the verge" of signing a three-year deal worth somewhere between $6 million and $8 million annually. (--Piers was a journalist in Britain before doing TV . . . although he wasn't working for the most reputable publications. He wrote for "The Sun" . . . and has served as the editor for both "News of the World" and the "Daily Mirror".) (--But he's also hosted several interview shows in the U.K., including "Piers Morgan On . . .", which is the one he's been doing for the past few years.) --Back in July, Larry King said if it were up to him, he'd want RYAN SEACREST to replace him . . . and he also kind of dissed Piers, saying, quote, "I don't know if I'd recognize him if he was walking down the street."


"AMERICA'S GOT TALENT" TOOK THE TOP TWO SPOTS IN THE RATINGS:

The "America's Got Talent" semi-finals took the top two spots in the ratings, with an average of 11 million people tuning in to see little Jackie Evancho advance to the Top 10. (--She was also one of the four acts to make it into the finals this week, along with fellow opera singer Prince Poppycock, blacklight performers Fighting Gravity, and singer Michael Grimm.)


THURSDAY TV REMINDERS: (--Check your local listings.)

--"NFL Opening Kickoff 2010" . . . 7:30 to 8:30 P.M. Eastern on NBC. (--Taylor Swift and the Dave Matthews Band perform.)

--"Sunday Night Football" [24th Season Premiere] . . . 8:30 to 11:30 P.M. Eastern on NBC. (--The New Orleans Saints host the Minnesota Vikings at the Superdome for the first game of the regular season.) (--Which is obviously on a Thursday and not a Sunday, but that's how they roll every year.)

--"Big Brother 12" [Eviction Night] . . . 8:00 to 9:00 P.M. on CBS.

--"The Vampire Diaries" [2nd Season Premiere] . . . 8:00 to 9:00 P.M. on the CW.

--"Nikita" [SERIES Premiere] . . . 9:00 to 10:00 P.M. on the CW. (--Asiatic minx Maggie Q, who you may remember from "Mission: Impossible 3" and the fourth "Die Hard" movie, stars in latest version of the 1990 French film "La Femme Nikita".) (--The USA Network already did "La Femme Nikita" as a series starring Peta Wilson. It ran from 1997 to 2001. The 1993 flick "Point of No Return", starring Bridget Fonda, was also a remake.)

--"Destination Truth" [4th Season Premiere] . . . 9:00 to 10:00 P.M. on Syfy.

--"Rookie Blue" [Two-hour 1st Season Finale] . . . 9:00 to 11:00 P.M. on ABC.

--"9/11 State of Emergency" . . . 9:00 to 11:00 P.M. on the History Channel. (--Former White House advisors Condoleezza Rice, Donald Rumsfeld, Richard Myers and Andrew Card discuss the critical decisions made by local and national leaders as well as everyday citizens during the 9/11 attacks.)

--"Watch What Happens" [3rd Season Premiere] . . . 10:00 to 10:30 P.M. on Bravo. (--"Real Housewives" stars Teresa Giudice and Stacie Scott Turner share their annoying thoughts.)

--"Supreme Court of Comedy" [3rd Season Finale] . . . 10:00 to 10:30 P.M. on DIRECTV. (--The comedy counsel of Bryan Callen and Paul Mooney argue the case of an artist and his apprentice's dispute over their contract.)

--"The Day Before" . . . 10:00 to 10:30 P.M. on Sundance. (--Donatella Versace's couture house is profiled as it prepares fashions for New York's Fashion Week.)

--"Beast Legends" [SERIES Premiere] . . . 10:00 to 11:00 P.M. on Syfy. (--The kraken, the mythical sea monster from "Clash of the Titans", is profiled.)

--"100 Greatest Artists of All Time" [Conclusion] . . . 10:00 to 11:00 P.M. on VH1.


LFO SINGER RICH CRONIN HAS DIED OF LEUKEMIA:

RICH CRONIN . . . the singer of LFO, a.k.a. the LYTE FUNKY ONES . . . died yesterday after a long battle with leukemia. He was 35. His brother said he passed away after suffering a stroke. (--Which was likely brought on by the cancer.)--Rich was diagnosed with leukemia in 2005 . . . and launched the Rich Cronin Hope Foundation to raise awareness for the disease. --LANCE BASS posted a message on Twitter saying, quote, "Sad sad day that Rich Cronin died. [He] was an amazing guy."


NATASHA BEDINGFIELD'S NEXT ALBUM WILL BE TITLED "STRIP ME":

NATASHA BEDINGFIELD . . . the British minx who you know from her hits "Unwritten" and "Pocketful of Sunshine" . . . will release her next album on November 9th. And it'll be titled: "Strip Me". --The first single, which is also called "Strip Me", will be out in two weeks.


AMY WINEHOUSE WILL APPEAR ON QUINCY JONES' NEW ALBUM:

If AMY WINEHOUSE has spent time in recording studios over the past four years . . . nothing has come of it. Until now. --QUINCY JONES says Amy appears on his upcoming album, "Q: Soul Bossa Nostra". She's covering the 1963 song "It's My Party" . . . which was Quincy's first hit as a producer. (--It was originally made famous by Leslie Gore.) --The disc . . . scheduled to come out sometime in November . . . also features appearances by Usher, Ludacris, Akon, Jamie Foxx, Jennifer Hudson, Mary J. Blige, T-Pain and LL Cool J.


LADY GAGA STOPPED HER SHOW IN D.C. TO BREAK UP A FIGHT:

LADY GAGA stopped her concert in Washington D.C. on Tuesday . . . to break up a fight. After spotting some fans brawling in the crowd, she stopped performing and shouted, quote, "Stop the music! Stop fighting! Do not fight at this show." --She later added, quote, "This is all about love and unity and happiness . . . no fighting." (--You can watch video of this at the link below. ***WARNING***: There's an UNCENSORED "bull(crap)" from her at the very end of the video.)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uaO4Qr2XBDI




KINGS OF LEON HAVE RELEASED A VIDEO FOR "RADIOACTIVE":

KINGS OF LEON have released the video for their new single, "Radioactive". (--It's the first single off their next album, "Come Around Sundown", which comes out October 19th.) --A word of warning: If you're hoping for a hard-hitting rock 'n' roll video . . . you might want to scale back your expectations . . . a lot. --It's not a bad video . . . although the first half seems like a dated commercial for orange soda. To put your expectations in place: The band runs around a field in the country, playing with a bunch of overdressed kids. (--Here it is . . .) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wPBbMbKSZrQ


BRANDON FLOWERS SAYS THE KILLERS WILL REUNITE NEXT YEAR:

When THE KILLERS announced they were taking some time off . . . they made a point of saying they were not breaking up, and it was NOT an indefinite hiatus. And it wasn't just talk. Singer BRANDON FLOWERS expects them to regroup soon. --He says, quote, "We don't have a date set but it will be next year. I miss them sometimes. We've shared a lot of experiences together. When the blows come it's nice to have people there to share them with." --During the band's downtime, Brandon recorded a solo album called "Flamingo", which will be out next Tuesday. He's currently on tour in Europe . . . and has dates booked through October 19th in London.


BEHOLD! THE DATES FOR USHER'S "OMG TOUR"!!!

USHER . . . the main guy we have to thank for the JUSTIN BIEBER phenomenon . . . has announced the dates for what he's calling his "OMG Tour." --For now, it's scheduled to go from November 10th in Seattle through December 18th in Hartford, Connecticut. (--You can find the full itinerary, here . . .) http://www.usherworld.com/pages/tour


THE NOMINEES FOR THIS YEAR'S "BET HIP-HOP AWARDS" ARE OUT:

The nominees for this year's "BET Hip-Hop Awards" are out . . . and JAY-Z leads everyone with 10, which is the most nominations for any one artist in the five-year history of the "BET Hip-Hop Awards". (--If that means anything to you.) --As usual, BET is handling the broadcast poorly. The ceremony will be taped on October 2nd, and all the winners will be leaked online. Then, it'll air 10 days later . . . on October 12th . . . when no one cares anymore. (--You can find all the nominees at BET.com, HERE.)


NAZZY’S RANDOM STUFF

BEST NEWS OF THE YEAR? SCIENTISTS PROVE THAT CHUBBY MEN ARE AMAZING IN BED!

--According to a brand-new year-long study, it's been scientifically proven that CHUBBY MEN are the best men to have sexual relations with. --Researchers at Erciyes University in Kayseri, Turkey, studied the connection between body mass index (BMI) and a man's sexual stamina. And they found that heavier men last WAY longer in bed than skinny men. --Yes, a chubby man may sweat, pant and turn red . . . but his stamina can't be touched. The average chubby male lover holds on for seven minutes and 18 seconds . . . the average skinny guy can only last one minute, 48 seconds. --That means the chubby guy lasts FOUR TIMES LONGER in bed. --The reason for this? Chubby men usually show higher levels of FEMALE HORMONES than skinnier men. Those hormones slow down the brain chemicals that lead toward a climax. --The researchers didn't draw this conclusion, but we will: Since America is the third-chubbiest country in the world, behind only American Samoa and Kiribati, that must mean we've got the third-best sexual stamina in the world too. (Salon)


THE MOST SEDUCTIVE DANCE MOVE A GUY CAN DO IS . . . BOUNCE HIS HEAD AND RIGHT LEG TO THE BEAT:

There's FINALLY a scientific explanation for why guys like to stand on a dance floor, nod their heads, and just barely move their feet to the music. Turns out, THAT'S the sick dance move that gets you laid. --Researchers at Northumbria University in England and the University of Gottingen in Germany just finished a study where women ranked those two moves as THE most impressive things a guy can do on the dance floor. --The sexiest dancing you can do is to move your head and right knee to the beat of the music. And if you add some extra flash to those moves . . . like shaking or twisting your head and knee . . . it's even better. -According to the researchers, those dance moves were more important than using the left leg, the hips, the elbows, the wrists, or the arms. --So things like fist pumping, the KID N' PLAY, the running man, the hula, shooting off finger guns, and air guitar are all somehow LESS sexy than just bouncing your head and popping your right knee. --The researchers don't know WHY the head and right knee are the most seductive male dance techniques, but they think, somehow, women biologically tie those moves to good health, strength and genetics. (Reuters)


A WOMAN IS FIRED BY HER BOSS . . . RECONNECTS WITH HIM ON A DATING WEBSITE . . . AND NOW THEY'RE MARRIED:

I think this is the ultimate proof that the best way to get a woman to like you . . . is to act like a complete a-hole toward her. --In 2007, a 35-year-old guy named Casey O'Keefe was the boss of 31-year-old Kelly Irish at the West Winds Assisted Living Facility in Zephyrhills, Florida. And Casey fired Kelly from her job as activities director under orders from a higher-up. --Now, three years later, they're married. --Kelly was a member of the dating website PlentyOfFish.com. After Casey fired her, she happened to spot his profile on the site. She sent him a message because she says, quote, "I need[ed] to forgive this guy and get over it." --But when they started instant messaging on the site, their conversations were natural and smooth . . . totally different than when they were boss and employee. And after a little while, Casey asked Kelly on a date. --They dated for a little while, but eventually broke things off. --A few years later, Kelly's old job opened up at the nursing home again. She applied and Casey rehired her. They started spending time together again, and Casey told Kelly he still loved her. She told him she still loved him too. --In May, Casey proposed to Kelly. --And over Labor Day weekend, they got married . . . at the nursing home. (St. Petersburg Times)


AND NOW, THREE MORE NEW THINGS TO WORRY ABOUT:

#1.) HAVING CHILDREN MAKES YOU DEPRESSED. A new study out of England finds that having a kid is a great way to become DEPRESSED. In the first year of a child's life, one out of three mothers suffer from a period of depression. --So do one out of five fathers. A lot of it is brought on by stress and a lack of sleep . . . but sometimes, the depression comes because you feel overwhelmed and unhappy, and THAT makes you feel EXTREMELY guilty. (AOL Health)

#2.) THE U.S. SMOKING RATE JUST WON'T GO DOWN. From the 1960s through 2004, the number of smokers in this country kept going down. But since then, the number has leveled off. --The CDC just released the numbers for 2009 and 21% of Americans are smokers . . . basically the same rate as the last five years. About 20% of teenagers are smokers too . . . and that percentage isn't going down either. --The director of the CDC estimates that smoking kills 1,000 Americans a day. 98% of children who live with a smoker have a measurable amount of tobacco toxins in their bodies. (Washington Post)

#3.) EVERYTHING IN YOUR HOME WANTS TO KILL YOU. Yahoo just published this list to show you that everything in your house is trying to KILL YOUR FAMILY . . . from your washer and dryer to your chimney to the squirrels outside.
http://shine.yahoo.com/channel/life/10-hidden-hazards-in-your-home-2341861/


SALT LAKE CITY IS THE LEAST STRESSFUL METRO AREA IN THE COUNTRY:

Sure, Mormons can't drink alcohol, they can't smoke, and they can't look at porno. But apparently, they don't NEED those things to calm down like the rest of us do. According to a new study, Salt Lake City, Utah, is the least stressful city in the U.S. --The rankings were compiled by the website Portfolio.com. They used 10 factors to figure out a city's stress level: Unemployment, income growth, poverty, heart disease, weather, ozone, robberies, murders, traffic, and the mortgage situation. --And when it's all added up, Salt Lake City came out as the least stressful of the 50 largest metro areas in the U.S. --The top 10 least stressful cities are: Salt Lake City . . . Virginia Beach-Norfolk . . . Minneapolis-St. Paul . . . Raleigh, North Carolina . . . Austin, Texas . . . Oklahoma City . . . Denver . . . San Antonio . . . Kansas City, Missouri . . . and Phoenix. --On the other side of things . . . as expected, Detroit is the most stressful city in the country by a pretty large margin. --The top 10 most stressful cities are: Detroit . . . Los Angeles . . . Cleveland . . . Riverside, California . . . St. Louis . . . New York . . . New Orleans . . . Chicago . . . Birmingham, Alabama . . . and Miami-Fort Lauderdale. (Portfolio)
(--You can see the rankings for all 50 major metropolitan areas here . . .)
http://www.portfolio.com/resources/Portfolio-2010-Metro-Area-Stress-Rank.pdf


THIRTEEN OF THE WORLD'S 21 DEADLIEST CITIES FOR PEDESTRIANS . . . INCLUDING THE TOP 11 . . . ARE IN THE U.S.:

When you see footage from huge cities in foreign countries, doesn't it always look like the drivers are crazy and the millions of people wandering around the streets could be run over at any second? --Well . . . no matter how dangerous all those cities look, NO ONE'S streets are more dangerous for pedestrians than OUR streets. --"GOOD Magazine" put together a list of the 21 most dangerous cities for pedestrians around the world, based on the fatality rates for people walking. And the U.S. has 13 of the 21 . . . including the full top 11, and 13 of the top 14. --Atlanta is the most dangerous city in the world for pedestrians, at 10.97 fatalities per 100,000 residents. --The rest of the top 11 are: Detroit, Los Angeles, Baltimore, Philadelphia, Chicago, Washington D.C., Milwaukee, San Francisco, Boston, and Seattle. --The first non-American city on the list is Copenhagen, Denmark, which is the 12th most dangerous. It's followed by New York and Portland, Oregon. --After those, the rest of the list goes: Amsterdam . . . Paris . . . London . . . Hong Kong . . . Tokyo . . . Berlin . . . and Stockholm, Sweden. (GOOD Magazine)


HERE ARE EIGHT WAYS THAT EUROPEANS WILL KNOW YOU'RE AN AMERICAN TOURIST:

"Life" magazine put together this list of some of the ways that Europeans will EASILY spot you as an American tourist. Check out the highlights . . .

#1.) You complain about the size of portions at meals.

#2.) You don't have very good etiquette at nude beaches. In other words, you're not comfortable being naked . . . and won't stop staring at people who are.

#3.) You don't have a solid grasp of European geography.

#4.) You over tip. Hey, a positive one! We tip 15% or 20% here . . . in most foreign countries it's closer to 5% or 10% at a restaurant.

#5.) You constantly compare the prices of things you see to their prices in the U.S.

#6.) You're shocked to find cars, restaurants and hotels don't always have air conditioning.

#7.) You love hand sanitizer. We had no idea, but apparently the whole Purell thing is a solidly American trend.

#8.) You're nervous about drinking tap water. (Life)


A RESTAURANT IN NORTH CAROLINA IS GETTING HEAT FOR BANNING SCREAMING CHILDREN:

Brenda Armes is the owner of Olde Salty in Carolina Beach, and she was sick of people bringing in their loud, annoying, undisciplined children and ruining everyone else's meals. So she decided to BAN screaming children from her restaurant. --There are two signs in the window now that read, quote, "Screaming Children WILL NOT Be Tolerated" and "Notice to all children and adults. There will be no crying, screaming, whining." --Of course, anytime you mess with people's blessed angels, there's going to be some blowback. Several people have complained about the policy and think it's unfair or discriminatory. --But Brenda says that, so far, it's been a GREAT business move. Quote, "It's brought us in more customers than it has ever kept away." --If someone brings a child to Olde Salty and the kid starts screaming, a manager will come over and ask the parent to take the kid outside until he calms down. Once he does, they can go back inside and keep eating; they won't be kicked out. (NBC 6 - Wilmington, North Carolina) (--Here's a news report about the restaurant. In the middle, Brenda actually CONFRONTS a woman who says she thinks the policy is unfair. She's a tough old broad . . .)
http://www.wect.com/global/story.asp?s=13107715


NAZZY’S SILLY VIDEOS OF THE DAY

#1.) AN "AMAZING RACE" CONTESTANT ACCIDENTALLY GOT DRILLED IN THE FACE WITH A WATERMELON:

"The Amazing Race" season premiere is September 26th, but in a teaser released yesterday, a contestant named Claire gets nailed in the face with a whole watermelon. It happens when the giant slingshot she's using backfires.
(--Search for "Amazing Race watermelon video." It happens at :26.)

http://www.starpulse.com/news/index.php/2010/09/08/amazing_race_contestant_gets_hit_in_th


#2.) HERE'S A GUY TRYING TO WALK HIS DOG . . . BUT THE DOG KEEPS LYING DOWN:

Most dogs love going for walks, but there's a video online of one that apparently DOESN'T. The guy in the video tries to walk his dog down the street . . . but the dog keeps lying down. --The best part is, the guy keeps walking and just drags the dog behind him. And the woman recording it on her cell phone can't stop cracking up.
(--Search for "good-for-nothing dog goes for a walk.")

http://www.liveleak.com/view?i=610_1283775449


#3.) A LION ATTACKED A TRAINER AT THE MGM GRAND IN LAS VEGAS:

Last week at the MGM Grand's Lion Habitat in Las Vegas, a lion attacked a trainer while a bunch of tourists were watching. --The lion latched onto the trainer's hand, but he got away and will reportedly be back at work soon. Meanwhile, the lion is already back on display. (--Search for "MGM Grand lion attack." It happens at :32. WARNING: It sounds like one of the tourists whispers the S-word at 1:05.)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gW_x-2MXrkI


#4.) AND NOW . . . A WOMAN GIVING A BURMESE PYTHON A BATH:

I didn't know this . . . but if you have a giant pet snake, apparently you have to BATHE it. There's a new video online of a woman putting her HUGE Burmese python in her bathtub. (--Go to CollegeHumor.com and search for "giant snake bath." She starts putting it in the tub around :29.)
http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1940954


#5.) DID OLD SPICE REPLACE THE "OLD SPICE GUY" WITH RAY LEWIS?

Old Spice just released a new ad that DOESN'T star the Old Spice Guy. This one shows NFL linebacker RAY LEWIS stepping out of the shower, putting a saddle on an oversized raven, and riding it out into the solar system.

(--Search for "Ray Lewis Old Spice ad.")
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sxqlw3cKZHA
FOUR SIGNS YOU'RE SLEEP-DEPRIVED:

According the magazine "Prevention", you can become so used to being sleep-deprived, you don't even notice how much it's affecting you on a daily basis. And sleeping in on the weekends won't fix it.

--And even if you get seven or eight hours of sleep a night STARTING NOW, it might still take a few WEEKS before you're completely caught up on sleep. Here are four signs you need to make sleep a bigger priority . . .


#1.) YOU HAVE TROUBLE MAKING SIMPLE DECISIONS. When you're tired, it's harder for your brain to tell the difference between what's important and what's not. So you have to think about EVERY DECISION a little bit longer.

#2.) YOU EAT AND EAT, BUT YOU'RE STILL HUNGRY. Chronic sleep loss can mess with your blood sugar and make your body produce less leptin . . . which is a hormone that curbs your appetite. -And lack of sleep also makes you produce MORE ghrelin (--pronounced grellin). It's a hormone that makes you hungrier.

#3.) YOU KEEP GETTING SICK. Researchers injected two groups of healthy volunteers with a cold virus: One group had gotten at least eight hours of sleep a night for the last week, and the other group had gotten less than seven hours a night. --In the end, THREE TIMES as many sleep-deprived people got sick.

#4.) YOU'VE BEEN EXTREMELY EMOTIONAL. In one study, volunteers skipped one night of sleep, then looked at disturbing images while researchers monitored their brain waves. -On no sleep, they had 60% more activity than normal in a part of the brain called the amygdala (--pronounced ah-MIG-da-la), which helps process fear and anxiety. (Prevention.com)


SITE FOR SORE EYES:

www.overturemarketplace.com

Some of the most prominent names in higher education have developed this new website in order to streamline the process of obtaining student loans. The initiative helps students browse through a larger number of loans at lower lending rates. Many students must wait for weeks or even months for their government-issued scholarships to materialize, but OvertureMarketPlace.com allows users to select private sector loans from a number of credit unions and banks. And using the new site to secure a loan does away with nearly all overhead costs for lending institutions. The site is available to students registered at private colleges in 12 states.


Frugal Rules

A new RedPlum Purse String Study finds that value has become second nature to Americans, even on a first date. According to the study, a majority of respondents would “whip out” a coupon at the movies or a restaurant to save money on that impressionable first encounter.

· 78% would use a coupon on a first date at the movie theaters.
· 77% would use a coupon on a first date at a restaurant.

While there was an option to do so “discreetly,” a majority of those who responded “yes” didn’t feel the need to conceal the fact that they were using a coupon. Other findings:

· 22% of respondents said they would do “pretty much anything” to get 25% or more in savings.
· 80% of respondents spend up to three hours each week seeking out coupons, deals and savings from all sources. This deal-seeking accounts for up to $50 in savings each week for 81% of respondents or an average annual savings of $2,600.
· 91% of respondents said they would not buy the perfect sweater if it wasn’t on sale; 73% would come back later during a sale with a store coupon; and 19% would go to the sale racks instead.
· 82% said they use the money they save with coupons on basic necessities or paying down debt, 56% and 26%, respectively.
· 12% said they are “splurging” with the money they have saved.



Tailgating Time

According to the latest Weber Tailgating Study, half of today's tailgate grillers are no longer satisfied with standard fare before the big game. An impressive 50% of those surveyed said that they consider themselves to be either “gourmet” food grillers or “between a gourmet and a basics” food griller (22% and 28%, respectively). While “basics” tailgate grillers spend an average of $441 in groceries per year for their parking lot parties, “gourmet” tailgaters spend an average of $1,001 – a whopping 127% more. This comes out to an average of $106 per tailgate for the basics group vs. $165 among the gourmets. Other findings:

· Gourmet grillers rank their favorite four parking lot foods as chicken (43%), ribs (39%), brats (37%), and steak (33%).
· Basics grillers rank their favorite foods as hamburgers (70%), brats (45%), chicken (42%), and hot dogs (42%).
· Gourmet grillers' tailgates host an average of 20 people per party vs. basics grillers saying they host an average of 14.
· Gourmet tailgate grillers also are more likely to take a full-size grill to cook their feasts at the game (46%) compared to basics grillers (24%) and those who rank themselves as falling in between the two styles (33%).
· New media technology now plays a bigger role in tailgating for more than one-third of tailgaters (36%) compared to their use of it five years ago. Of these respondents, almost one-half use smart phones at 49%; 48% use grilling/food/recipe apps; and 47% use laptop computers while tailgating.
· Overall, 12.5% of Americans over age 18 have tailgated in the last 12 months – attending an average of 3.4 tailgates each. Those ages 24-34 are more likely to tailgate (19%), followed those ages 18-24 (17%), and then those ages 35-44 (16%).
· When it comes to the grill or smoker type used at tailgates, charcoal still rules at 58%, followed by gas (48%), smokers (10%), and electric (7%).