APRIL 9, 2010

HOLLYWOOD DIRT OVERFLOW

SOMEONE FLEW A BANNER OVER THE MASTERS THAT SAID "TIGER: DID YOU MEAN BOOTYISM?":

You had to know someone was going to be a WISE-ASS and try to steal the spotlight when TIGER WOODS teed off at the Masters yesterday. --We don't know who that someone was, but he or she paid for planes to fly over Augusta trailing banners with two WISE-ASS messages. They were:--"TIGER: DID YOU MEAN BOOTYISM?"--And . . . "SEX ADDICT? YEAH. RIGHT. SURE. ME TOO!" (--The first one is a reference to Tiger's claim that he was getting back into Buddhism after his sex scandal broke. . .)(--And here's video of the "Bootyism" banner flying overhead, via an ESPN news report . . .)http://www.tmz.com/videos?autoplay=true&mediaKey=70cb920f-3192-4b02-9581-8f5258f6c9b6(--And here's Tiger getting a warm welcome as he steps up to the tee for the first time . . . minus that goatee he'd been growing . . .)http://www.tmz.com/videos?autoplay=true&mediaKey=d6644ac6-74b0-447e-9b2c-2d014d792ee1(--By the way . . . remember during his press conference Monday, when Tiger said he hoped to, quote, "calm down my negative outbursts"? He isn't quite there yet.)(--Check out Tiger's "negative outburst" after he shanked one on the 14th hole yesterday . . .)http://www.tmz.com/videos?autoplay=true&mediaKey=8c661e6f-d792-46be-b6b4-bf02ef4b9d15


THE AUDIO USED IN TIGER WOODS' NEW NIKE COMMERCIAL ACTUALLY CAME FROM A 2004 DOCUMENTARY:

Well, we now know where the audio of EARL WOODS in TIGER'S new Nike ad came from. --It's from a 2004 documentary called "Tiger Woods Part 1: Tiger's Prowl - His Life". --The documentary features interviews with Tiger, Earl and Tiger's mom, KULTIDA. --The audio used in the Nike ad was taken completely out of context. It turns out Earl wasn't even talking to or about Tiger. He was discussing the differences in his and Kultida's personalities. --He said, quote, "Tida is very authoritative. She is very definitive. 'Yes' and 'No.' I am more prone to be inquisitive, to promote discussion. --"I want to find out what you're thinking was, I want to find out what your feelings are and did you learn anything? So, we were two different types but we coexisted pretty well." (--Obviously, Nike added a quick clip of Earl saying "Tiger" at the beginning, to make it appear that Earl was addressing his son. Here's the ad again . . .) http://www.youtube.com/nikegolf


IS SANDRA BULLOCK TERRIFIED OF JESSE JAMES???

This sounds pretty far-fetched. But it does come from the "National Enquirer" . . . and they ARE candidates for the Pulitzer Prize. (???) So here it is . . . --SANDRA BULLOCK has reportedly told JESSE JAMES that their marriage is over . . . and now, she's TERRIFIED. She even . . . allegedly . . . hired a top security team to protect her 24-7. --A so-called "source" says, quote, "I think Sandra has been frightened to death ever since she told Jesse." --Obviously, Jesse feels like a complete JACKASS for what he's done to Sandra. But at the same time, he's FURIOUS with her. Not only because she won't take him back, but also because this whole thing has made him so hated. --And if he were to do Sandra physical harm, it might not be the first time. A source says that in her divorce papers, Sandra will accuse Jesse of mental and physical abuse.


ARE JESSE JAMES' KIDS LIVING WITH SANDRA BULLOCK???

TMZ is reporting that all three of JESSE JAMES' kids are living with SANDRA BULLOCK. A so-called "source" says, quote, "It's a positive sign about Sandra's relationship with Jesse." (--Whatever that means.) --Sandra and the kids are not at Sandra's mansion in the Hollywood Hills. She snuck out of there after the paparazzi started swarming around the joint.


RIHANNA FINALLY ADMITS SHE'S DATING MATT KEMP:

RIHANNA is finally admitting what everyone already figured out months ago: She and L.A. Dodger MATT KEMP are dating. --Yesterday morning on RYAN SEACREST'S radio show, she said, quote, "He's my boyfriend." --She did NOT, however, confirm recent rumors that they're engaged. But it doesn't sound like they are. She added, quote, "It's new and it's fun. It's nothing too serious. --"I don't want anything that's going to take up so much of my energy and time right now in a bad way. I just want to have fun, and that's what it's about." --Rihanna does have a wedding coming up . . . that of KATY PERRY and British comedian RUSSELL BRAND. Rihanna is planning the bachelorette party. --She said, quote, "[Katy] put that on me last week. Now I have to come up with something cool, 'cuz she's getting married in India. So I'm like, 'Okay now what do I do to match that for a bachelorette party?'"


ED WESTWICK HAS BROKEN UP WITH JESSICA SZOHR:

ED WESTWICK broke up with his "Gossip Girl" co-star, JESSICA SZOHR, over rumors that she may have cheated on him with one of his best friends. --The other man is some rich guy named Marco Minuto. A so-called "source" says, quote, "Jessica recently celebrated her birthday in L.A. and was being openly affectionate and flirty with Marco. --"They ended up back at the same hotel, but nobody knows what happened behind closed doors. Her flirty behavior shocked a lot of their friends, so word quickly got back to Ed, who has been filming in Europe. --"He immediately ended their relationship on the phone." --Jessica, meanwhile, denies anything happened, and has been, quote, "begging Ed to take her back." (--Ed Westwick plays Chuck Bass on "Gossip Girl". Jessica Szohr plays Vanessa Abrams.)


IS JENNIFER LOVE HEWITT REBOUNDING WITH JENNY MCCARTHY'S EX-HUSBAND???

JENNIFER LOVE HEWITT may be having rebound relations with JENNY MCCARTHY'S ex-husband. --So-called "sources" say actor (slash) director JOHN ASHER has been helping Jennifer get past her breakup with JAMIE KENNEDY. One friend says, quote, "They've been spending a lot of time together and are having fun." --Jennifer and Jamie broke up last month after about a year together. John was married to Jenny McCarthy from 1999 to 2005. He's the father of her 8-year-old son Evan, who has autism. --Meanwhile . . . As you may know, Jennifer Love Hewitt dedicated her book, "The Day I Shot Cupid", to Jamie Kennedy. And it ended up hitting book stores AFTER THEY BROKE UP. --But Jennifer would like you to know she had time to remove his name, and chose not to. Here's why . . . quote, "I meant the things that I said in the book and he really did teach me a lot and I'm very grateful to him for that. --"We're kind of opposites . . . I'm like this gushy romantic and he's sort of a realist, so he really taught me how to look at the reality of love, whereas maybe I had my head in the clouds before . . . He taught me a lot about men and what they think."


WILL MILEY CYRUS GET MARRIED WHEN SHE'S 18???

"OK!" magazine says that MILEY CYRUS is so serious about her boyfriend, LIAM HEMSWORTH, that she plans to marry him as soon as she turns 18 . . . which is on November 23rd. --A so-called "source" says, quote, "She's convinced she'll spend the rest of her life with him . . . She's even asked her mom if she can wear her wedding dress."


BRUCE JENNER HAS CONFIRMED THAT KIM KARDASHIAN AND REGGIE BUSH BROKE UP:

There have been conflicting reports as to whether or not KIM KARDASHIAN and REGGIE BUSH broke up. But Kim's stepdad, BRUCE JENNER, has confirmed it. --And he tells "Life & Style", quote, "I love Reggie, and I love Kim. Sometimes timing is just everything. --"To see your kids go out there and handle it so well, I'm proud of them. They're good, intelligent people. They know how to deal with this stuff." --Meanwhile . . . Bruce's son, BRODY JENNER, was spotted making out with the recently-divorced AVRIL LAVIGNE in a 1968 Dodge Charger the other day. (--There's a little twist to this story, if you care: E! Online says that Avril, Brody and Avril's ex-husband, DERYCK WHIBLEY, were all out on the town together in Hollywood on Wednesday night.) --Everybody seemed to be friends . . . although Deryck did leave by himself . . . while Avril and Brody left together.)


THERE WILL BE NO PUBLIC MEMORIAL FOR COREY HAIM . . . BECAUSE HIS MOTHER DOESN'T WANT ONE:

COREY FELDMAN had been planning to hold a public memorial for COREY HAIM in Los Angeles. But that's not happening anymore . . . because Haim's mom, Judy, doesn't want it to. --Feldman says, quote, "[It would be] too much for her to bear at this time . . . I must respect the wishes of his mother, and help her in any way I can through this difficult time. --"Ultimately that is what Corey would have wanted more than anything . . . to know that his mother is at peace as much as possible in his absence." --Feldman said he's going to have a private dinner with a small group of friends instead. (--As you may recall, Judy Haim is battling breast cancer.)


NANCY KERRIGAN'S BROTHER HAS BEEN CHARGED WITH MANSLAUGHTER:

NANCY KERRIGAN'S brother MARK was indicted yesterday on a MANSLAUGHTER charge related to the death of his father Daniel. --Daniel suffered a fatal heart attack on January 24th, following a physical altercation with Mark at their Massachusetts home. Mark had initially been charged with assault. --But yesterday, the attorney general said, quote, "This defendant should have known that the cruel acts that he committed against his elderly father, including grabbing him by the neck with enough force to cause a fracture, were highly likely to result in substantial harm and endanger his father's life. --"Compounding these tragic circumstances is the fact that we allege the altercation by the defendant began because he wasn't allowed to use the family telephone late that night." --The Kerrigan family isn't happy with the newly-upgraded charge. They're standing up for Mark, and saying Daniel's heart attack was unrelated to the fight. --Their attorney says, quote, "I'm disappointed. Manslaughter is a more serious charge than involuntary manslaughter. And it will definitely be harder to prove. --"They have to establish that he acted recklessly knowing that he acted knowing he could cause serious injury or death."


HUGH JACKMAN WILL PLAY A CHARACTER WITH TESTICLES UNDER HIS CHIN:

There's a movie in the works called "Untitled Comedy". It's one of those sketch-comedy movies, like "Kentucky Fried Movie" in the '70s, or "Amazon Women on the Moon" in the '80s. --It's a feature-length flick made up of numerous, unrelated comedy skits. --One of those skits stars HUGH JACKMAN as a man with a set of testicles UNDER HIS CHIN. (???) And no one seems to find anything strange about this except for KATE WINSLET. She plays a woman he goes out on a date with. (--"Untitled Comedy" is due out sometime this year. The cast also includes Gerard Butler, Naomi Watts, Justin Long, Sam Rockwell, Elizabeth Banks, Sean William Scott, Tony Shalhoub, Johnny Knoxville and Emma Stone.)


DEMI MOORE WILL PLAY MILEY CYRUS' MOM:

DEMI MOORE confirmed on Twitter that she'll play MILEY CYRUS' mom in a movie called "LOL". --It's a remake of a French movie of the same name . . . in which a teenager is dealing with her first heartbreak, plus her mom's recent divorce, at the same time. Filming begins in July.


OPRAH WINFREY IS COMING TO PRIMETIME . . . SORT OF:

OPRAH WINFREY'S new cable network, OWN . . . which debuts on January 1st . . . has unveiled some of the programming that's in development at the network. --The most intriguing part of the announcement is that Oprah will indeed be hosting a new talk show . . . but this time, it WON'T air in daytime. --Instead, she'll host a PRIMETIME show called "Oprah's Next Chapter". An exact timeslot has yet to be announced . . . but considering the bedtimes of her target audience, 8:00 P.M. wouldn't be a bad guess. --It'll be an hour-long show, which will air two or three times a week. --OWN describes it as, quote, "a whole new kind of Oprah show, [with] riveting conversations with the people we all want to hear from . . . in some very unexpected places . . . [including] the Taj Mahal to [Oprah's] beloved oak tree, the Great Wall to her own teahouse." --There's no premiere date yet, but it's expected to be LATE next year . . . after her syndicated show finally comes to an end on September 9th, 2011. --The rest of the programming on OWN is exactly what you'd expect from Oprah . . . inspirational and motivational, offered up with the occasional help of celebrities, who somehow come off sounding LIFETIMES wiser than us. --Oprah's buddy GAYLE KING will have her own talk show called "Gayle King Live!". The title is punctuated with an exclamation point, if that matters. --SHANIA TWAIN will host a show called "Why Not?" . . . in which she talks about all her problems, and how she's trying to overcome them. And as we've heard, there will be a behind-the-scenes show following the final season of Oprah's syndicated series. -Finally, there will be a series called "Your OWN Show: Oprah's Search for the Next TV Star". And that's exactly what it'll be: A reality competition-type show . . . in which Oprah will try to discover the next superstar talk show host.


THE OBAMAS WILL APPEAR ON "IDOL GIVES BACK":

On Wednesday, PRESIDENT OBAMA and his wife, MICHELLE, taped a video message for this year's "Idol Gives Back" charity special. The two-hour event will air on Wednesday, April 21st.


"JERSEY SHORE" HAS A PREMIERE DATE:

MTV has announced that "Jersey Shore's" second season will debut on July 29th. This season will have TWO settings. --A spokesperson for the network says, quote, "It's official, the 'Jersey Shore' cast began filming Season Two in Miami. Once the boardwalk heats back up, the series will return to the Jersey Shore to complete the season."


"THE BACHELOR" IS GETTING ANOTHER SPIN-OFF:

Some of us got our fill of "The Bachelor" in 2003 . . . but some people STILL haven't gotten enough. For those people, ABC has announced another "Bachelor" spin-off. --This one is called "Bachelor Pad", and it'll feature 20 "unforgettable" former "Bachelor" and "Bachelorette" contestants. There aren't many details yet . . . other than that they'll get a "second chance at romance." (--Yeah, because that'll totally happen. Hasn't anyone figured out yet that the motivation for 99% of these people to do these shows ISN'T to find love, but to BE ON TV??? That's why almost none of these "love connections" last.) --"Bachelor Pad" will premiere August 9th . . . after the next season of "The Bachelorette", with recent "Bachelor" reject Ali Fedotowsky. That one begins on May 24th.


DOES ABC HAVE AN EYEWITNESS WHO WILL DISPUTE NICOLLETTE SHERIDAN'S ALLEGATIONS AGAINST MARC CHERRY?

ABC reportedly has an EYEWITNESS who will dispute NICOLLETTE SHERIDAN'S claim that "Desperate Housewives" creator MARC CHERRY struck her in the face on the set a while back . . . after she questioned one of his decisions. --A "source" tells RadarOnline . . . which seems to have an endless parade of sources on this story . . . quote, "This is not Nicollette's word against Marc's. The witness is going to blow Nicollette's case out of the water." --So Nicollette just made this whole thing up? Well, not completely. The "source" says the eyewitness DID see . . . quote, "[Marc] lightly touching the top of her head as he was talking to her about how to act in a scene." --Supposedly, the eyewitness has signed an affidavit, and has agreed to testify if needed. (--On Monday, Nicollette filed a $20 MILLION lawsuit against Cherry . . . accusing him of assault and battery, gender violence and wrongful termination.)


MARTHA STEWART WILL PLAY HERSELF ON "THE SIMPSONS":

MARTHA STEWART will guest-star on a Christmas-themed episode of "The Simpsons", which is expected to air in December. She will be playing herself, and teaching Marge the true meaning of Christmas.


FRIDAY TV REMINDERS: (--Check local listings for times in your area.)
--"The Masters Golf Tournament" [2nd Round of Competition] . . . 4:00 to 7:30 P.M. Eastern on ESPN. (--The fourth and final round airs on Sunday.)
--"Friday Night Alright" [1st Season Finale] . . . 11:00 to 11:30 P.M. on VH1. (--Adam Lambert performs.)
SATURDAY TV REMINDERS:
--"The Masters Golf Tournament" [3rd Round] . . . 3:30 to 6:00 P.M. ET on CBS.
--"NASCAR '10: Phoenix 500" . . . 7:00 to 11:00 P.M. Eastern on Fox. (--Drivers are scheduled to complete 375 laps, which is an increase of 63 laps from previous years.)
--"Saturday Night Live" . . . 11:30 P.M. to 1:00 A.M. on NBC. (--Tina Fey guest hosts and Justin Bieber is the musical guest.)
SUNDAY TV REMINDERS:
--"The Masters Golf Tournament" [Final Round] . . . 2:00 to 7:00 P.M. ET on CBS.
--"Extreme Makeover: Home Edition" . . . 8:00 to 9:00 P.M. on ABC. (--The WWE's Big Show, Brie Bella, Nikki Bella and R-Truth are this week's volunteers, along with NASCAR's Jeff Gordon.)
--"Family Guy" . . . 9:00 to 9:30 P.M. on Fox. (--The Griffins think the Earth is going to be destroyed by a black hole. Anne Hathaway and Jason Mraz guest.)
--"Undercover Boss" [1st Season Finale] . . . 9:00 to 10:00 P.M. on CBS.
--"Celebrity Apprentice" . . . 9:00 to 10:00 P.M. on NBC. (--The teams create a deodorant commercial with former NBA studs Clyde Drexler and Scottie Pippen.)
--"What Chilli Wants" [SERIES Premiere] . . . 10:30 to 11:00 P.M. on VH1. (--TLC's Rozonda "Chilli" Thomas works on her love life for your reality-viewing pleasure.)


MALCOLM MCLAREN IS DEAD:

Punk music pioneer MALCOLM MCLAREN died of cancer yesterday. He was 64. --McLaren is probably best known for being the manager of the SEX PISTOLS . . . which he's also credited with putting together. --In a statement, JOHNNY ROTTEN said, quote, "For me, Malc was always entertaining, and I hope you remember that. Above all else he was an entertainer and I will miss him, and so should you." --Malcolm also briefly managed the NEW YORK DOLLS, ADAM AND THE ANTS and he created BOW WOW WOW. --He also released his own albums . . . notably "Duck Rock" in 1983 and "Waltz Darling" in 1989.


KELIS HAS A NEW ALBUM COMING OUT . . . AND YOU CAN WATCH THE VIDEO FOR THE FIRST SINGLE HERE:

KELIS has announced that her new album will come out on July 6th. It's called "Flesh Tone", and it'll be her first album in four years. (--Half of that time was spent pregnant . . . breaking up with NAS . . . and fighting him in court for a ridiculous amount of child and spousal support.) --Kelis recently debuted a video for the first single, a track called "Acapella". --She says, quote, "It's very 'last woman standing. It's like the end-of-the-world child type thing. It's got all these ethnic influences in it. --"There is a Native American element to it and an African element to it and an Asian element to it. It's really tribal and kind of surreal at the same time." (--Inspired by THREE continents, wow. That isn't something you see everyday. But hey, if all you know her for is "Milkshake", then you'll get to see a COMPLETELY different side of her with this video.) (--You can check it out at her website. Here's the link . . .) http://www.iamkelis.com/acapella/



NAZZY'S RANDOM STUFF

IF HAIR GROWTH PRODUCTS AREN'T HELPING WITH YOUR BALDNESS . . . WHY NOT "BALDAZZLE" YOUR CHROME DOME?

According to a study in next month's "Consumer Reports", the most effective treatment for dealing with MALE PATTERN BALDNESS is Propecia. But only about 27% of Propecia users re-grow their hair. And Rogaine is almost completely ineffective. --But there's a bald guy named Philip Levine who runs a website called PhilSays.com, and he's all about coming up with fun ways to decorate his chrome dome. --His latest method is called "Baldazzling," and it's when you take gems and other stones and "bedazzle" them onto your head. (???) --If you've never heard of the BeDazzler, it's a dumb product that's advertised on late-night TV, which allows you to affix studs and rhinestones to your clothes. (Style List)


POTATO CHIPS ARE THE MOST DANGEROUS THING TO EAT WHILE YOU'RE DRIVING:

According to a slightly random survey in the UK, 5% of all drivers admit they've crashed or nearly caused an accident after spilling food on themselves while driving. --With that in mind, here are the ten most dangerous foods to eat at the wheel:
#1.) Potato chips#2.) Chocolate bars#3.) Bottled drinks#4.) Canned drinks (???)#5.) Coffee or tea#6.) Sandwiches and wraps#7.) Fruit#8.) French fries#9.) Candy#10.) Burgers(SWNS News / Mirror)


A TEENAGER IN MAINE IS GOING TO EAT THE 1,800-POUND BULL THAT GORED HIM:

17-year-old Vinnie Huntington lives on his family's farm in Durham, Maine (--in the southern part of the state, about 25 miles north of Portland). --On Monday, Vinnie was trying to round up a 1,800-pound bull named Cinnamon that got out of his pen. But before he could, Cinnamon charged at Vinnie, gored him in the back, flipped him up in the air, and started stomping on him. --Vinnie was rescued by his mom and a neighbor, and was rushed to the hospital. He was treated for two dislocated shoulders, two puncture wounds, and other minor injuries. --Fortunately, his doctors expect a full recovery. But the news for Cinnamon wasn't so sweet . . .--Just after attacking Vinnie, Cinnamon was SHOT. And now, Vinnie's family is planning to make a MEAL of the bull . . . or several meals, actually. --But don't feel too bad for Cinnamon. Vinnie says, quote, "We were probably going to eat him eventually, but now that this has happened, he's already been cut up. I'm going to enjoy it, too." (WMTW News 8 - Portland)


ONE IN FIVE PEOPLE THINK THERE ARE ALIENS LIVING AMONG US:

According to a new international survey, ONE in FIVE people worldwide believes there are ALIENS living in our midst, and that they're disguised as humans. Or look at it this way . . . --There are more than a BILLION people on the planet who think some of us are from outer space. (???) (Yahoo News)


THE AVERAGE WOMAN SPENDS NEARLY THREE YEARS OF HER LIFE SHOPPING:

This survey took place in the UK, but I bet you the results wouldn't be any different here . . . --According to a new survey, the average woman spends more than 25,184 hours of her life SHOPPING for clothes, food and other essentials. --If you break that down, it means the average woman spends roughly TWO YEARS and TEN MONTHS of her life shopping. (Sun)


A PLAYER ON THE SAN FRANCISCO GIANTS WORE A MISSPELLED JERSEY WEDNESDAY:

In case you failed spelling in elementary school, "San Francisco" is spelled S-A-N-F-R-A-N-C-I-S-C-O. --But on Wednesday night, a player for the San Francisco Giants named Eugenio Velez took the field wearing a jersey that misspelled it S-A-N-F-R-A-N-C-I-C-S-O. --Which I suppose would be pronounced "San Fran-sick-so." (???) (Yahoo Sports) (--And this isn't the first time this has happened. You may remember last season, when Adam Dunn and Ryan Zimmerman of the Washington Nationals were seen wearing jerseys that said "Natinals" during a game.) (--Majestic Athletic, the company that provides the uniforms for all 30 Major League Baseball teams, was responsible for BOTH screw-ups.)



NAZZY’S SILLY VIDEOS OF THE DAY

#1.) HERE'S A PARODY OF THE NEW TIGER WOODS NIKE AD WITH VOICEOVER BY BILL CLINTON:

A parody of the new TIGER WOODS Nike ad has voiceover from BILL CLINTON asking, "Did you learn anything? . . . Like deleting your text messages?" (--Search for "Tiger Woods Bill Clinton Nike." Here's the parody, and the Nike ad.)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ofxvxT3P1kshttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5NTRvlrP2NU


#2.) A GUY GOT HIS CAMPER STUCK IN A NARROW ALLEY:
A guy got his camper stuck in the end of a narrow alley. First he tried reverse to get it free, then he hit the gas and ripped the entire top off, while his beer-drinking friends laughed. (--Search for "camper stuck in narrow alley." He hits the gas at 1:18. WARNING: This video includes the F-word.)http://www.break.com/index/camper-stuck-in-narrow-alley.html


#3.) SOMEONE ORGANIZED A "ZOMBIE WALK" FOR CHARITY:
A bunch of people in Canada dressed up like zombies and walked through town asking for donations to fight animal cruelty. (--Search for "Moncton Canada zombie walk.")http://www.ireport.com/docs/DOC-428260?hpt=C2



A FEW THINGS THAT WILL MAKE YOU MORE ATTRACTIVE TO MEN:

An amazing rack will only get you so far with most guys. Okay, it'll get you REALLY far. But if you want to KEEP their attention, you'll have to play up some other qualities. According to the relationship geniuses at "Cosmo", here are four things that might work.

#1.) DON'T ACT IMPRESSED. In the beginning, you should never shower a guy with tons of attention, since it can make him feel pressured. --If you act like you're not easily impressed, it'll send the message that you're not pressuring him, and that you may even be slightly out of reach. And if he thinks you're out of reach, he'll work harder to win you over.

#2.) BE COMFORTABLE IN YOUR SKIN. It doesn't matter how sexy your outfit is . . . if you're not confident and comfortable with your own body, a guy can tell.

#3.) SHOW OFF YOUR PLAYFUL SIDE. Being playful shows that instead of getting all worked up, you're cool, you can have fun, and you can laugh at yourself. In the long run, guys do NOT want to deal with a head-case who turns everything into drama.

#4.) TALK ABOUT WHAT YOU REALLY LOVE. Don’t pretend to be someone you're not, or to be interested in things you could care less about. That's the WORST way to get somebody's attention, because they'll figure out pretty quickly that it's B.S. --Just be honest about what you like to do. Men like confidence and drama-free honesty. They're also looking for excitement and passion in a relationship, so they'll be more attracted to someone who's willing to try new things. (Cosmopolitan)

April 8, 2010

HOLLYWOOD DIRT OVERFLOW

CHECK OUT TIGER WOODS' NEW NIKE AD . . . IN WHICH TIGER'S DEAD FATHER ASKS HIM IF HE "LEARNED ANYTHING":

TIGER WOODS' new Nike ad hit the web yesterday. It's just a black-and-white clip of Tiger standing there, as a recording of his DEAD FATHER'S VOICE speaks to him. --EARL WOODS tells his son, quote, "I want to find out what your thinking was, I want to find out what your feelings are, and did you learn anything?" --Nike says, quote, "We support Tiger and his family. As he returns to competitive golf, the ad addresses his time away from the game using the powerful words of his father." (--Check it out here . . .)http://www.tmz.com/videos?autoplay=true&mediaKey=ebdb4949-d2c6-42cb-b2c8-eba3412b3603--Meanwhile, Augusta National Chairman Billy Payne met with Tiger when he arrived for the Masters on Sunday. --He wouldn't say what they discussed, but at his own press conference yesterday, Payne said, quote, "It is simply not the degree of his conduct that is so egregious here. --"It is the fact that he disappointed all of us, and more importantly, our kids and our grandkids. Our hero did not live up to the expectations of the role model we saw for our children." --He added, quote, "Is there a way forward? I hope yes. I think yes. But certainly, his future will never again be measured only by his performance against par; but measured by the sincerity of his efforts to change. --"I hope he now realizes that every kid he passes on the course wants his swing, but would settle for his smile." (--The Masters Tournament kicks off TODAY. Tiger's tee time is 1:42 P.M. Eastern . . . and you can watch it on ESPN, starting at 4:00 P.M. Eastern.)


SANDRA BULLOCK AND JESSE JAMES ARE REPORTEDLY COMMUNICATING . . . THROUGH OTHER PEOPLE:

RadarOnline.com says that SANDRA BULLOCK and JESSE JAMES are communicating . . . but only through other people. --A so-called "source" says, quote, "Sandra and Jesse spoke once when he left rehab. But the majority of communication has been through intermediaries. They've been passing messages back and forth." --That doesn't mean they're getting back together, though. RadarOnline says Sandra is still furious, and she, quote, "feels no obligation to him."

QUINTON AARON LIKED JESSE JAMES WHEN HE MET HIM:

SANDRA BULLOCK'S "Blind Side" co-star, QUINTON AARON, says he actually LIKED JESSE JAMES when he met him . . . quote, "I didn't meet him until the premiere. He seemed like a real cool guy . . . real loving. --"They seemed like the perfect couple when I met them. I had a lot of respect for him." --Apparently, after everything that's happened, he STILL feels that way. (???) He says, quote, "From what I know, Jesse's a real cool guy. Sandra's a real awesome individual. So my prayers go out to them for everything they're going through."


TIKI BARBER'S WIFE IS PREGNANT . . . AND HE'S LEAVING HER FOR A 23-YEAR-OLD BLONDE:

Yesterday, we heard that former Giants running back and "Today Show" correspondent TIKI BARBER had split with his wife of 11 years. Well, more details have emerged . . . and it looks like Tiki's got some damage control to do. --See, Tiki's wife Ginny is eight months pregnant. With TWINS. --And he's leaving her for ANOTHER WOMAN. A younger woman. She's 23. And blonde. Tiki just turned 35 yesterday. --Tiki's new action is Traci Lynn Johnson, an intern at NBC. --Ironically, Tiki has spoken in the past about his anger toward his own, cheating father. In 2004, he told the "New York Post", quote, "I don't give a (crap) that the relationship didn't work. --"Not only did he abandon [my mother], I felt like he abandoned us for a lot of our lives. I have a hard time forgiving that."


CHECK OUT BRISTOL PALIN'S ABSTINENCE PSA:

BRISTOL PALIN . . . America's most treasured unwed teenage mother . . . recorded a new public service announcement about ABSTINENCE. --She urges kids not to have sex because . . . well . . . most of them aren't as well off as she and her family are. --She says, quote, "What if I didn't come from a famous family? What if I didn't have their support? What if I didn't have all these opportunities? Believe me, it wouldn't be pretty. --"Pause before you play." (--She starts out standing in a well-furnished room with nice clothes on herself and her son, and at the end of the "what ifs" she and Tripp are left in a bare room, wearing little more than t-shirt and jeans. Check it out here . . .http://www.usmagazine.com/momsbabies/news/video-see-teen-mom-bristol-palin-urge-teens-not-to-have-sex-201074(--Some people are calling this ad hypocritical . . . since Bristol did NOT pause before SHE played, but now she's telling everyone else that THEY have to. (--Others say she's sending the message that she had leeway to mess around because of her money . . . and she's warning people who aren't as well off that they aren't allowed to have that same wiggle room.) (--But let's not let politics muddy the message here. Bristol made a mistake. And she's trying to help other kids NOT make that same mistake. Why try to turn that into something negative?) (--As far as the whole "What if I didn't have" thing . . . well, it's true. A lot of teens who get pregnant DON'T have the financial or emotional support that Bristol has. But her message is aimed as much at those who DO as those who DON'T.) (--So really . . . whether you think Sarah Palin is an archangel or the Antichrist . . . and whether you think abstinence works or not . . . let's not forget that not EVERYTHING has to be political.) (--Teens not getting pregnant. Sounds like a worthwhile message to me. Some stuff just makes sense no matter who's palm it's written on.)


ROBIN THICKE AND PAULA PATTON HAVE A NEW BABY BOY:

Singer ROBIN THICKE and his insanely hot wife, PAULA PATTON, have a new baby boy. Paula popped the kid out on Tuesday. They named him Julian Fuego. ((--Paula played Ms. Rain in "Precious", and Robin is the son of TV SUPERSTAR ALAN THICKE . . . so really, what else does he need to accomplish???) (???)


IS RIHANNA ENGAGED???

This probably ISN'T true, so don't get too excited: "Sister 2 Sister" magazine says that RIHANNA and Los Angeles Dodger MATT KEMP are ENGAGED. --A so-called "source" says, quote, "Matt surprised Rihanna last week when he approached her and asked for her hand in marriage. --"She said yes, but also relayed the message of feeling that this may be too soon and a long engagement should follow."


NICOLAS CAGE'S BEL-AIR MANSION WENT UP FOR AUCTION YESTERDAY . . . BUT THERE WERE NO TAKERS:

NICOLAS CAGE lost one of his homes yesterday. His Bel-Air mansion . . . which had gone into foreclosure . . . went up for auction yesterday. There were no takers. --The bidding opened at $10.4 million, and this is a property Cage once tried to sell for $35 million. Cage owed about $17 million on the property. --The place has HUNDREDS of comic book covers framed and hanging on the walls . . . model train tracks running a few feet below the ceiling through several rooms . . . a central tower . . . a custom wine cellar . . . and a 35-seat home theater. --The bank also foreclosed on two adjacent properties Nic owned in Malibu. Those also went on the block yesterday . . . but again, there were no takers. (--Cage is suing his former business manager for $20 million . . . claiming the guy led him to FINANCIAL RUIN.)


MEGAN FOX AND BRIAN AUSTIN GREEN DID A "FUNNY OR DIE" VIDEO ABOUT SCHOOL FUNDING CUTS IN CALIFORNIA:

MEGAN FOX and her boyfriend, BRIAN AUSTIN GREEN, did a video for FunnyOrDie.com about school funding cuts in California. --It's kind of funny . . . but it's also got a serious message, so it's not HI-larious. (--You can check it out here . . .)http://www.funnyordie.com/videos/7d5ec0278e/megan-fox-is-hot-for-teachers


JESSICA SIMPSON WAS PHOTOGRAPHED WITHOUT MAKEUP FOR THE NEW ISSUE OF "MARIE CLAIRE" MAGAZINE:

JESSICA SIMPSON allowed herself to be photographed without makeup and without the aid of Photoshop, for the new issue of "Marie Claire" magazine. --It's all part of her new "A Beautiful Me" program . . . which she's launching next month to encourage young women to be happy with who they are. --She says, quote, "I don't have anything to prove anymore. What other people think of me is not my business." --She adds, quote, "If I'm in a mood to go out and feel hot and sexy, I want long hair that I can feel on my back. But I also like bed head."


MARTINA NAVRATILOVA HAS BREAST CANCER:

Legendary tennis star MARTINA NAVRATILOVA announced yesterday that she has breast cancer. But she said it was diagnosed early and her prognosis is excellent. --Martina was diagnosed in February. She said, quote, "I cried. It knocked me on my ass, really. I feel so in control of my life and my body, and then this comes, and it's completely out of my hands." --Martina had the tumor removed, and will begin six weeks of radiation therapy next month. --Martina would also like to remind women to get screened regularly for breast cancer . . . quote, "I went four years between mammograms. I let it slide. --"Everyone gets busy, but don't make excuses. I stay in shape and eat right, and it happened to me. Another year and I could have been in big trouble."(--Here's video . . .)http://www.radaronline.com/exclusives/2010/04/martina-navratilova-calls-breast-cancer-diagnosis-her-personal-911


CHECK OUT THE TRAILER FOR "DINNER FOR SCHMUCKS":

The trailer for the upcoming STEVE CARELL / PAUL RUDD comedy "Dinner For Schmucks" hit the web yesterday. The movie comes out in July. (--Check it out . . .) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eZ4i_woBTF8


JON GOSSELIN *HAS* FILED FOR PRIMARY CUSTODY OF HIS CHILDREN:

Well, it happened. Yesterday, JON GOSSELIN'S appropriately named laywer, Anthony F. List, went to a Pennsylvania court and filed papers asking for a judge to grant Jon primary custody of his eight children. --Earlier this week, List explained that Jon was simply FORCED to make this move because KATE GOSSELIN had become a, quote, "absentee mom." --That's in reference to her gig on "Dancing with the Stars" and her upcoming reality series on TLC, which is still in development. Those things, which are JOBS, currently make Kate less available to care for their children than Jon, who's unemployed. --Jon is also asking a judge to reevaluate the terms of his child support. He's paying Kate $20,000 a month, and it sounds like he believes Kate should be paying HIM. --The court papers also argue that Kate, quote, "abuses" their custody agreement . . . and doesn't fulfill her obligation to document the money she spends on the kids. --Kate reportedly flies from L.A. back home to Pennsylvania every weekend, but List says that isn't enough. He says, quote, "You can't be a coast-to-coast primary parent." In her absence, she has an "army of nannies" taking care of the children. --Meanwhile, List also tells TMZ that both he and Jon have been voting for Kate on "Dancing with the Stars". (???) (--Well, that's interesting. It sure sounds like there's a motive in that . . . since her success would keep her away LONGER.)


TEAM KATE SAYS JON GOSSELIN IS ONLY GOING AFTER HER FOR MONEY:

KATE GOSSELIN'S attorney, Mark Momjian, has read through JON GOSSELIN'S court filing for primary custody of the children . . . and he's not impressed. In fact, he describes it as, quote, "incoherent" . . . and "pathetic." --He adds, quote, "[Jon has] never questioned her ability to provide for their children." --And not surprisingly, he believes Jon is creating this whole dust-up over money . . . because Kate is out trying to support her family, and Jon's bank account is dwindling. --Momjian tells RadarOnline, quote, "I don't want to speculate too much on Jon's motivation but I do think it's obvious that he seems to time his issues regarding the kids to when Kate is doing well. I mean, let's look at this . . . --"He pulled the plug on ['Jon and Kate Plus Eight'] when Kate was doing well with the kids. And now that Kate is on 'Dancing with the Stars' and pulling in 20 million viewers he decides to try to amend the custody. Is that a coincidence? --"Do I think his motivation is the children's best interest. Squarely no." --For what it's worth, a "source" tells RadarOnline that Jon himself was an "absentee parent" up until recently. Supposedly, he went WEEKS without seeing the kids while he was dating some chick named Morgan Christie, who has since dumped him. --Momjian also addressed the childcare situation back in Pennsylvania. --In the court filing, Jon said he should be allowed to stay at the guesthouse on the property, and that Kate recently booted him and replaced him with three nannies. -Momjian said that since the house was awarded to Kate, she can do whatever she wants with it. He adds that she allows Jon to stay at the guesthouse while she's there, but he was asked to leave while she was out of town filming "Dancing". --It's unclear where Jon is currently staying. Momjian says, quote, "I don't even know where Jon lives! He doesn't even list an address in the court filing." --Jon . . . again, according to RadarOnline's sources . . . is currently living with his brother somewhere, and he isn't too thrilled with that arrangement. But that may be his only option for now, since he's running out of money. --A so-called "source" says, "The truth is Jon is going broke. He hasn't had a steady job since 'Jon and Kate' went off the air. His cash is disappearing quickly." --Kate is reportedly making $200,000 for her appearance on "Dancing" . . . and has more checks coming with her upcoming TLC show. As for Jon, it was his decision to end "Jon and Kate" . . . and now he's apparently applying to be a full-time mooch.


A FEW DETAILS ON KATE GOSSELIN'S NEW TLC SHOW:

KATE GOSSELIN'S new TLC reality show will be called "Twist of Kate" . . . and it'll involve her giving advice to other mothers who have been inspired by her plight.--Kate says, quote, "I want to be out there learning from others, helping to provide insight whenever I can, though I don't consider myself an expert on anything." --The show will involve her reading and answering "fan letters" from other women, and visiting "the homes and workplaces of everyday people." It's expected to premiere late this summer.


HUGH HEFNER WON'T ASK KATE GOSSELIN TO POSE FOR "PLAYBOY":

For whatever reason, someone recently asked HUGH HEFNER if he'd be interested in having KATE GOSSELIN pose for "Playboy". He responded, quote, "No! No! I don't think she's a celebrity." (--Amen.)


EVA LONGORIA IS "REALLY CONFUSED" OVER NICOLLETTE SHERIDAN'S "DESPERATE HOUSEWIVES" LAWSUIT:

EVA LONGORIA was apparently BLIND-SIDED by NICOLLETTE SHERIDAN'S $20 million lawsuit against "Desperate Housewives" creator MARC CHERRY . . . but she would like to figure out what's going on. -In a radio interview . . . (--with RYAN SEACREST) . . . Eva started off by saying, quote, "I don't know any of the details." And then, she dropped some details. --She said, quote, "I do know that . . . it's true, obviously it is true, [Nicollette] is doing it. I know that they did have a thing on set . . . I guess it was a couple of years ago. --"It's so long ago, the actual incident, and I wasn't on set when it happened. But apparently this incident had happened, and she felt it was wrong. I am trying to get the dirt here on set, but no one's allowed to talk about it." --And then, she went on to talk about it. (???) --She said, quote, "That something, um, happened on set regarding, um, them doing a scene. She was doing a scene, and something that he . . . he was showing her how to do a scene. Honestly, I wish I knew." --And then, she went on to say that she knew who WOULD know what happened. --She OUTED her then co-star NEAL MCDONOUGH . . . who she said was the only other actor on the set at the time of the alleged incident. (--Somewhere, Neal is cursing Eva's name . . . and wishing she'd just shut her freakin' trap!!!) (--Neal played Edie's psycho husband. His character got violent with her after she found out he only married her as part of a plan to kill Mike and Susan.) (--That's probably the scene Eva's talking about. Which makes sense, considering Nicollette's suing Marc Cherry for ASSAULT AND BATTERY.) --Eva also did a little blanket DAMAGE CONTROL . . . quote, "[Marc is] funny and sweet and really probably could not harm a fly. He's just so sweet. Nicollette's a sweet girl, too. I'm really confused about this whole thing. --"That's a big lawsuit . . . it's a big deal. I love the show so much I would hate for anything to really tarnish the reputation of [it]. I really would like all of it to go away." (--You can hear some audio of this from Seacrest's radio show, here . . .)http://tmz.vo.llnwd.net/o28/newsdesk/tmz_audio/040710_eva_longoria_1-2.mp3--Meanwhile, a "source" tells RadarOnline that all the ladies on "Desperate Housewives" secretly support Nicollette . . . but they're afraid to speak out against Marc, because he might bump off their characters, too. --The source says, quote, "They're all silently behind her . . . [but] it's unlikely that anyone will step forward to support Nicollette . . . their characters are all still alive on the show, and they have a lot more to lose than she does." --And yet another "source" says that the REAL story is that Nicollette was canned because, quote, "She didn't know her lines." (???)


SCANDAL ALERT!!! IS MAX WEINBERG SECRETLY ON TEAM LENO?

This seems EXTREMELY hard to believe, but it's making the rounds online . . . so we might as well just get it out there. --Movieline.com claims they have so-called "sources" telling them that CONAN O'BRIEN'S longtime bandleader MAX WEINBERG wants to jump ship . . . and join JAY LENO on "The Tonight Show". --There IS an opening there, because Leno's bandleader KEVIN EUBANKS is planning on leaving late-night TV to do his own thing. --There isn't any REAL proof . . . but this "source" claims that Max has always wanted to be the "Tonight Show" bandleader. And his brief time doing it for Conan just wasn't enough. --Another piece of "evidence" is that a few members of Max's band are taking part in Conan's upcoming comedy tour . . . but Max is not. (--We'll keep you posted.) --Speaking of Team Conan, SLASH is a member. He proudly and BRAVELY wore a "Team Coco" pin while performing on "The Tonight Show" on Tuesday night. It's unclear whether or not Jay noticed. (--Here's a picture . . .)http://tcs.wisebrother.com/tcstodaysTcs/fullArtShow/4498?cid=2603


CHRISTOPHER MELONI *ISN'T* LEAVING "LAW & ORDER: SVU":

CHRISTOPHER MELONI . . . who plays Detective Elliot Stabler on "Law & Order: Special Victims Unit" . . . has denied a story saying that he was leaving the show. (--That's AFTER Season 12 . . . which will air NEXT year.) --He tells "Us" magazine, quote, "It's lies. All lies. No." --The initial report . . . published back in February in Australia's "Courier-Mail" newspaper . . . quoted him as saying: "I think 12 years is enough, a good number. --"The writers will have fertile ground to figure out how to arc [my character] out to another place . . . whether it's this world or the next." --But now, Christopher is attempting to clarify his remarks. He says, quote, "What I said was 'When your contract is done . . . that will be the end. Because when your contract is done, it's usually the end. --"But when [producers] come back to me, you know, we can always talk.' I couched it incorrectly. It wasn't [the reporter's] fault." --He also said that, at least for now, he wants to remain with the show as long as it continues to get renewed by NBC. (--In other words, Christopher is cool with staying onboard . . . as long as he and NBC can agree on contract terms.)


WHITNEY HOUSTON CANCELS MORE SHOWS . . . AND SAYS SHE'S FINE:

WHITNEY HOUSTON has now postponed the first four shows of her European tour, after being hospitalized for an "upper respiratory infection." --She's out of the hospital, and the tour is now set to start next Tuesday in England. Make-up dates for the four canceled shows have yet to be announced. -Regardless of what DRUG RUMORS you might see on the Internet, Whitney is FINE. --She tells "People", quote, "[The rumors are] ridiculous. At this point, I just don't respond. I don't even read it. I'm feeling great. My health is terrific. But this is a time when I get a lot of allergies. I'm just ready to move on and continue my tour."


NICKI MINAJ IS NO LONGER ONBOARD RIHANNA'S TOUR:

Earlier this week, rapper NICKI MINAJ was announced as one of the openers on RIHANNA'S summer tour, along with KE$HA. Well, now she's decided to bail. --On Twitter, she wrote, quote, "I will not be going out on RiRi's tour. I've decided [to] use that time [for] the completion of my album. Hope u understand." --That's all we have for now. There's no word if she'll be replaced.


USHER HAS KNOCKED JUSTIN BIEBER OFF THE TOP OF THE CHARTS:

Maybe ERYKAH BADU should strip in Dallas more often. "New Amerykah, Part Two: Return of the Ankh" debuts at #4 this week, after moving 110,000 copies. --But the top spot goes to USHER. His latest, "Raymond vs. Raymond", sold 329,000 copies and knocks JUSTIN BIEBER down to #2. Here are the Top 10 albums . . .
1.) (NEW) "Raymond vs. Raymond", Usher (329,000 copies)2.) "My World 2.0", Justin Bieber (291,000 copies)3.) "Now That's What I Call Music! 33" (123,000 copies)4.) (NEW) "New Amerykah, Part Two", Erykah Badu (110,000 copies)


LIL WAYNE HAS A BIZARRE JOB IN THE CLINK:

LIL WAYNE'S ex-wife, ANTONIA "TOYA" CARTER, says that Wayne has an interesting job at Rikers Island prison. --She says, quote, "They got him on suicide watch for other prisoners. He watches the crazy prisoners and makes sure they don't kill themselves. He likes the job even though they don't pay him much." --Toya added that Wayne is, quote, "doing OK . . . [and] getting along with everybody."


50 CENT SAYS THERE ARE DOUBLE STANDARDS IN VIDEO CENSORSHIP:

50 CENT liked the video for "Telephone", by LADY GAGA and BEYONCÉ, but he says it proves that there are double standards regarding censorship. --He says, quote, "It's interesting how [the censors] let things go. Standards on each artist are held completely different. It's their personal perception of your intentions. --"There's actually a shot [in 'Telephone'] at the table in the diner where it's just [breasts]. It looks great. But if I shot the same shot in my music video, they would make me edit it immediately. --"Even if I had a female talent that was a recognizable talent that I asked to be a part of the project, they wouldn't let that go. They'd think in some way you are taking advantage of a woman for marketing purposes. It's different standards."


KELLIE PICKLER SAYS SHE HAS "NO IDEA" IF TAYLOR SWIFT IS DATING "GLEE'S" CORY MONTEITH:

TAYLOR SWIFT may be enormously famous, but for my money, her biggest accomplishment so far is her ability to keep everyone in the dark about who she's actually dating. And that includes her friend and touring partner KELLIE PICKLER. --"Okay!" magazine asked Kellie if she's met Taylor's alleged boyfriend, "Glee's" CORY MONTEITH. Kellie said, quote, "I don’t even know who that is. I've never seen the show. I don't watch television, and I have no idea." --To be fair, Kellie says she and Taylor have kind of grown apart . . . even though they've been touring together since last year. --She says, quote, "We both are even busier this year than last year. You really see each other backstage passing to go onto the stage, and that's about it."


NAZZY’S RANDOM STUFF

47% OF AMERICANS WILL PAY *NO* FEDERAL INCOME TAXES THIS YEAR:

Your taxes are due a week from today. But before you start freaking out about how much money you owe the Feds, think about THIS . . . --47% of American households won't pay ANY federal income taxes for 2009. That's because they either earned too little money, or had enough credits, deductions and exemptions to cancel out their liability.--Take a family of four earning $50,000 a year: --They're entitled to a standard deduction of $11,400, and four personal deductions of $3,650 apiece. That leaves their taxable income at $24,000 . . . meaning they owe $2,769 in federal income taxes.--If their kids are both younger than 17, the family gets two child tax credits of $1,000 apiece. --And after their $800 Making Work Pay Credit . . . which was part of PRESIDENT OBAMA'S economic stimulus plan last year . . . the government would actually OWE the family $31. --To be fair, the family would still have to pay state and local taxes, and federal payroll taxes for Social Security and Medicare. But so does everyone else. --Overall, the breakdown looks like this: The top 10% of earners . . . meaning households earning an average of $366,400 . . . will pay 73% of all income taxes collected by the federal government. --Meanwhile, the bottom 40% of earners can all expect a refund from the federal government. --Now, as much as you may want to, you can't totally blame . . . or thank . . . the Obama administration. Here's why: --In 2007, just 38% of American households didn't have to pay federal income taxes. But in 2008, 49% didn't pay federal income taxes. --In other words, MORE Americans are paying federal income taxes after Obama's first year in office, than in PRESIDENT BUSH'S last year in office. (Yahoo News)


A WOMAN CRASHED UNDER A BILLBOARD FOR CAR CRASH VICTIMS:

Yesterday, 51-year-old Yolande Raymond of Tampa, Florida, passed out at the wheel of her car while driving, and crashed into a beauty salon. --Ironically, the accident happened directly underneath a billboard advertising help for victims of car accidents. It's deliciously HI-larious. -Yolande's injuries are serious, but not life threatening. No one else was injured in the crash. (WTSP News 10 - Tampa)


THE SECRET SERVICE DENIED OBAMA'S REQUEST FOR A HYBRID LIMO:

Last week, PRESIDENT OBAMA spoke at a plant in North Carolina that makes battery components for hybrid cars. Afterward, he was asked if he would ever consider using a hybrid limo to get around. --Obama said that when he first got Secret Service protection, he asked if he could ride in a hybrid. But the Secret Service DENIED his request. --It's because the limo Obama rides in is loaded up with protective armor plating and glass, which makes it TWO or THREE times heavier than a normal car. Apparently, a hybrid engine wouldn't be powerful enough to make it accelerate. --As Obama put it, quote, "The cars that I'm in are like tanks . . . There's a little bit of extra stuff on there." (AutoBlog / CBS News)


THE BABY NAMES GAINING POPULARITY THE FASTEST THIS YEAR ARE CASTIEL FOR BOYS AND SOOKIE FOR GIRLS:

There's a popular baby name website called BabyNameWizard.com. Its operators keep a database called the "Namipedia," which tracks baby naming trends based on Internet research. -Here's a look at the ten most popular girl names this year:
#1.) Charlotte #2.) Olivia#3.) Elizabeth#4.) Amelia#5.) Emily#6.) Ava#7.) Ella#8.) Claire#9.) Emma#10.) Violet
--And here are the ten most popular boy names this year:
#1.) Oliver#2.) Owen#3.) Henry#4.) Liam#5.) James#6.) Jack#7.) Alexander#8.) Benjamin#9.) William#10.) Noah
--Meanwhile, the five girl names that are rising in popularity the fastest are:
#1.) Sookie#2.) Tenley#3.) Eloise#4.) Genevieve#5.) Piper--And the five boy names that are rising in popularity the fastest are:
#1.) Castiel
#2.) Declan#3.) Atreyu#4.) Dashiell#5.) Phineas (Parent Dish)(--You can link to the "Namipedia" here . . .)http://www.babynamewizard.com/namipedia


ONE IN 600 WOMEN DON'T REALIZE THEY'RE PREGNANT UNTIL THEY GO INTO LABOR:

According to two new studies in Europe, ONE in 600 women have no idea they're pregnant until they go into labor. (???) --And it's not just young, first-time mothers who miss the signals. A lot of the time, it happens to women in their forties who've given birth before, but weren't aware they could still get pregnant. --As reported in one German study, quote: --"The absence of many physical symptoms of pregnancy, inexperience, general inattentiveness to bodily cues, intense psychological conflicts about the pregnancy, and external stresses can contribute to the denial in otherwise well-adjusted women." (London Times)


HERE ARE TEN RULES NO AIRLINE WOULD EVER ENFORCE . . . BUT MAYBE SHOULD:

Flying sucks. And if you're sitting next to someone who smells . . . or is hammered . . . or has a crying baby, it can be downright miserable. --With that in mind, the people over at AOL Travel came up with a list of ten rules no airline would ever really enforce . . . but maybe SHOULD. Check it out:
#1.) Passengers can only place their carry-on bags in the overhead bin directly above their seat. All other overhead bins are off-limits.#2.) Passengers who are already drunk should be banned from boarding.#3.) Airlines are required to tell passengers about any hidden surcharges or in-flight fees before they buy their ticket. And if there's a delay, passengers should be told exactly what's going on, and how long it will be before the situation is fixed. #4.) All kids are required to have their own seat.#5.) Passengers should be banned from violating the personal space of others. If an obese passenger can't comfortably fit in their seat without spilling over into the next seat, they have to buy two tickets.#6.) Passengers are required to have proper hygiene. That means no taking off your shoes and socks. And if you've got B.O., airlines should be required to have an emergency stash of deodorant on hand.#7.) Airlines should be forced to THOROUGHLY clean planes after every flight.#8.) Passengers should be required to keep the noise down. And yes, this includes all you loudmouths who immediately get on your cell phone the moment the plane touches down. #9.) All airlines should be required to institute dual boarding procedures. That's when passengers are boarded from the front and back of the plane at the same time.#10.) Passengers with tight connections should always be allowed to get off the plane first.(AOL Travel)


THE NEW YORK YANKEES ARE WORTH $1.6 BILLION:

Every year, "Forbes" compiles a list of the most valuable franchises in Major League Baseball. It's based on revenue earned from ticket sales and TV deals, player salaries, operating costs, and a bunch of other factors. --The five most valuable baseball franchises are:
#1.) New York Yankees - $1.6 BILLION#2.) Boston Red Sox - $870 MILLION#3.) New York Mets - $858 MILLION#4.) Los Angeles Dodgers - $727 MILLION#5.) Chicago Cubs - $726 MILLION--And the five least valuable baseball franchises are:#1.) Pittsburgh Pirates - $289 MILLION#2.) Oakland Athletics - $295 MILLION#3.) Tampa Bay Rays - $316 MILLION#4.) Florida Marlins - $317 MILLION#5.) Toronto Blue Jays - $326 MILLION--In other words, the Yankees are worth nearly twice as much as the next most valuable team, the Red Sox. And they're worth five and a half times more than the Pirates. Or look at it this way . . . --Theoretically, if the Pirates can offer a player a contract worth $20 MILLION, the Yankees can just as easily offer one worth $110 MILLION. And you wonder why the Pirates haven't won the World Series since 1979. (???) --Here are a few other interesting stats: --The average baseball franchise turned a profit of $17.4 MILLION last year. Only two franchises lost money on the year . . . the Arizona Diamondbacks and the Detroit Tigers. --Despite being one of the least valuable teams, the Florida Marlins managed to turn the highest profit last year . . . $46.1 MILLION --Overall, the average Major League Baseball team is worth $491 MILLION. That's up 2% from last year. (Forbes)(--You can link to the full list here . . .)http://www.forbes.com/lists/2010/33/baseball-valuations-10_The-Business-Of-Baseball_Rank.html


NAZZY’S SILLY VIDEOS OF THE DAY

#1.) HERE'S TAIWAN'S VERSION OF SUSAN BOYLE:

There's a kid named Lin Yu Chun who's being called "the next Susan Boyle." On a singing competition in Taiwan called "Super Star Avenue", he nailed the Whitney Houston version of "I Will Always Love You". And I mean nailed it. You'd never know he looked like a miniature Asian version of Newt Gingrich with a bowl cut.(--Search for "Taiwanese Boy Sings "I Will Always Love You".) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1RgXC303Q5A

#2.) A FEMALE BASKETBALL PLAYER TRIED TO DUNK BY JUMPING OFF ANOTHER PLAYER'S BACK, BUT SHE FAILED MISERABLY:

During a basketball game, a girl got down on her hands and knees in front of the basket, and another girl tried to dunk by jumping off her back. But she fell on her face instead. (--Search for "Kelsey's dunk ahahahaha." She tries the dunk at :11.)http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IvvmiAbPBss

#3.) A BAND TEACHER SMASHED A KID'S VIOLIN, THEN REVEALED IT WAS JUST AN APRIL FOOLS' DAY PRANK:

Students were shocked when their orchestra teacher smashed a kid's violin and broke the bow over his knee. Then the teacher and the kid revealed it was just an April Fools' Day prank. (--Search for "band teacher loses it April Fools." It happens at :30.)http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i66939hY838

#4.) CHECK OUT DUELING COMEDY SKETCHES WHERE GUYS ACT LIKE GIRLS, AND GIRLS ACT LIKE GUYS:

A comedy group called Harvard Sailing Team did a sketch with guys complaining about their weight and craving frozen yogurt. And another video of girls watching sports and complaining about their nagging boyfriends. --Search for "Harvard Sailing Team Boys Will Be Girls" and "Girls Will Be Boys.")
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gspaoaecNAghttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=paNiEdFTvuA


SEVEN SURPRISING THINGS THAT MAKE ALLERGIES WORSE:

Sixty million Americans suffer from seasonal allergies. And there are a lot of things that can make your allergies worse that you probably wouldn't think of. Here are the top seven from "Prevention" magazine . . .

#1.) STRESS. In 2008, researchers at Ohio State University found that people with allergies had worse symptoms after they took a stress test -So if you're stressed out, compensate by making sure you get enough sleep. Being tired makes your allergies worse all by itself. Plus, it raises your stress level.

#2.) A GLASS OF WINE WITH DINNER. Researchers think the bacteria and yeast in alcohol can produce histamines, which are the chemicals that cause allergy symptoms. And avoiding alcohol can make your symptoms less noticeable.

#3.) WAITING TOO LONG TO TAKE ALLERGY MEDICINE. Antihistamines work best if you take them before you have any symptoms. So you're supposed to start taking allergy meds a few weeks before allergy season begins. --In other words, if you had allergies last Spring, start taking medication now, even if you don't have any symptoms yet.

#4.) WASHING YOUR SHEETS IN COLD WATER. Researchers in South Korea found that washing bed sheets in hot, 140-degree water killed 100% of the dust mites. But a WARM wash at 104 degrees only killed 6.5%.

#5.) HOUSEPLANTS. More than 75% of people with hay fever are also allergic to at least one common houseplant. Researchers found that varieties of ficus, yucca, ivy, palm, orchid, and fern are the most irritating plants for allergy sufferers.

#6.) FRIENDS WHO SMOKE. Just being around cigarette smoke and getting it on your clothing can make your allergies worse. In fact, researchers in Japan studied kids with at least one parent who smoked heavily. --And 80% of the kids showed signs of nasal allergies.

#7.) ONLY SHOWERING IN THE MORNING. Pollen sticks to your clothes and gets stuck in your hair. So if your allergies are bad, jump in the shower as soon as you get home from work, then put on new clothes. --You don't have to take a full shower. Just rinse yourself off. (Pevention.com)

April 7, 2010

HOLLYWOOD DIRT OVERFLOW

SANDRA BULLOCK SAYS "THERE IS NO SEX TAPE":

Over the weekend, a RIDICULOUS rumor started going around about a SANDRA BULLOCK / JESSE JAMES sex video. --It was so stupid we ignored it on the spot. But we should pass along that Sandra issued an official denial yesterday. --She said, quote, "There is no sex tape. There never has been one and there never will be one." --Just for the sake of your personal knowledge, we might as well tell you what was supposedly on the video. --Meanwhile, RadarOnline.com is now claiming that Jesse has more than a DOZEN homemade sex tapes . . . but they're with OTHER WOMEN, not Sandra. --A so-called "source" says, quote, "Most of the tapes feature a mass amount of Nazi paraphernalia. It's all really quite disturbing." --Someone who watched one of the tapes says, quote, "What I saw was a naked woman on her knees and Jesse in a Nazi hat waving his arm in a salute. It looked like the woman's hands were bound. --"He was shouting and singing and appearing to swig from a bottle of bourbon every now and then."


JIM CARREY AND JENNY MCCARTHY HAVE BROKEN UP:

After five years together, JIM CARREY and JENNY MCCARTHY have decided to go their separate ways. --Jenny issued a statement saying, quote, "I'm so grateful for the years Jim and I shared together. I will continue to be in his daughter's life and will always keep Jim as a leading man in my heart." --And Jim posted this on Twitter . . . quote, "I'm grateful 4 the many blessings we've shared and I wish her the very best! S'okay!" --And here's the official statement from Jim's rep . . . quote, "Jim and Jenny have recently decided to end their five-year relationship. They are grateful for the many blessings they have shared and wish each other the very best." (--As for why it happened, this one seems to have everybody stumped. Nobody saw it coming. Jim and Jenny always talked about not being interested in marriage . . . but at the same time, they seemed totally devoted to each other.) (--Jim was extremely close with Jenny's autistic son . . . and Jenny was just recently talking about how excited she was to be a 37-year-old grandma to Jim's daughter's new baby.)


BRETT FAVRE IS A GRANDFATHER:

Now BRETT FAVRE absolutely HAS TO play another season in the NFL . . . just so he can say he played as a GRANDFATHER. --Brett's 21-year-old daughter Brittany gave birth to a baby boy on Friday. She and her husband named him Parker Brett. (--What are the stats on Grandpas being active players in the NFL? Have there even been any before? Any sports savants out there who can get us up to speed on this?)


VIVID ENTERTAINMENT WILL DELAY THE RELEASE OF THE MINDY MCCREADY SEX VIDEO:

Vivid Entertainment is delaying the release of the MINDY MCCREADY sex video, while they make sure they definitely have the right to put it out there in the first place. --The company says, quote, "We've decided to take a little extra time to study all of our documentation and other clearances before we proceed." --Mindy's lawyers . . . who are trying to block the release . . . said, quote, "We stand by our original statement that Ms. McCready has never made any video for Vivid, or any entertainment company of that genre, and that there is no proof of authorization from Vivid to release any likeness of Ms. McCready, in any format. --"We have formally requested that they provide proof of authorization, or refrain from using Ms. McCready's likeness, period." (--The video . . . titled "Mindy McCready: Baseball Mistress" . . . was originally supposed to come out on April 19th.)


MICHAEL LOHAN IS MARRYING JON GOSSELIN'S OLD GIRLFRIEND:

Two idiots are about to become even BIGGER idiots. MICHAEL LOHAN is engaged to KATE MAJOR . . . one of JON GOSSELIN'S ex-girlfriends. They're planning on getting married before the end of the year. --Kate is 27 . . . Michael will turn 50 on April 25th.


JENNIFER LOVE HEWITT SAYS SHE'S BEEN CHEATED ON A LOT:

If I was slicing myself off a piece of JENNIFER LOVE HEWITT whenever the spirit moved me, I'm not sure what else I'd need. But apparently, not everyone thinks like me. --On RYAN SEACREST'S radio show yesterday, Jennifer said she's been cheated on A LOT. --She didn't name any names, but she said, quote, "It's brutal. Once I found out on television and that was awesome. And then another time I found them together . . . and that was, woooo! That was not good." --Another time, she said she had a feeling a guy was cheating on her, so she checked into it and, quote, "found some phone stuff."


MARK MCGRATH OF SUGAR RAY IS EXPECTING TWINS:

MARK MCGRATH of SUGAR RAY is about to become a dad . . . twice. His girlfriend Carin Kingsland is expecting twins . . . a boy and a girl . . . in May. They got pregnant through in vitro fertilization. --He says, quote, "I love them already, but I need them to come out so I can really shower them with love." --McGrath . . . who'll be hosting Fox's "Don't Forget the Lyrics" in the fall . . . says he and Carin got engaged on New Year's Eve. They've been dating on-and-off for 16 years.


COREY HAIM OBTAINED 553 PILLS IN THE MONTH BEFORE HIS DEATH:

California Attorney General Jerry Brown called COREY HAIM a "poster child" for prescription drug abuse yesterday. --Brown said that in the month before Corey's death, he'd obtained 553 pills from seven different doctors. The meds included Vicodin, Xanax, Valium and Soma. --Corey also apparently had an illegal prescription pad, so he could write his own prescriptions, and forge a doctor's signature. --Brown said, quote, "Legal, prescribed drugs can be just as dangerous as street drugs, and doctor shopping can be deadly. This is an epidemic." --Ironically, at the time of his death last month, Corey was also planning to do a, quote, "media special on how easy it was for him to obtain pain medications." (--The official cause of Corey's death hasn't been determined yet. Authorities are still waiting for the results of toxicology tests.)


DAN PATRICK SAYS *NOBODY* DRAGGED THEIR FEET IN LETTING ERIN ANDREWS KNOW HER LIFE WAS BEING THREATENED:

Sportscaster DAN PATRICK says that nobody dragged their feet when it came to letting ESPN reporter ERIN ANDREWS know that her life was being threatened. --Erin was notified late last week that "The Dan Patrick Show" . . . which airs on DirecTV . . . was receiving e-mails threatening Erin's life.-And it turned out that the e-mails started coming LAST SEPTEMBER . . . although at first, they were just sexual in nature. They didn't start turning violent until last month. --Still, Erin was pretty upset that nobody told her about them until now. --But on his radio show Monday, Patrick explained that the show wasn't even aware it was receiving these e-mails until one of his assistants opened one last week. --That's because the show receives HUNDREDS of e-mails a day . . . and most of them are never even opened. --But once the staffer discovered last week's e-mail, he brought it to Dan's attention, who passed it along to DirecTV. They immediately took it to the police. --In the meantime, the staffer went back into the archive of unopened e-mails and found all the rest that had been piling up since last September --After explaining that, Patrick said, quote, "I want to make it very, very clear: We did not sit on any type of information that had to do with these death threats. As soon as we saw it, we passed it on." (--Here's video of Dan's explanation . . .)http://www.tmz.com/videos?autoplay=true&mediaKey=d2336407-216e-4854-a87d-dffb88cebe30


UNDER-INFLATED TIRES ARE BEING BLAMED FOR THE TRAVIS BARKER / DJ AM PLANE CRASH:

Federal investigators are blaming under-inflated tires for the Learjet crash that killed four people and seriously injured BLINK-182 drummer TRAVIS BARKER and DJ AM back in September of 2008. --The investigators told the National Transportation Safety Board that the problem is widespread because operators of air charters aren't checking tire pressure on their business jets frequently enough. --All four of the plane's tires exploded as the plane sped down the runway at 150 miles per hour. Pieces of the tires, hurled at high speeds, damaged the plane's hydraulic system, which caused the brakes to fail. --Barker and DJ AM were the only survivors of the crash . . . but AM died of a drug overdose last year.


DR. CONRAD MURRAY WILL NOT COP A PLEA:

So-called "sources" tell TMZ that DR. CONRAD MURRAY is confident he'll be found not guilty in MICHAEL JACKSON'S death. --Thus, he will not plead guilty to involuntary manslaughter or a lesser charge (--Supposedly, he plans to argue that the dose of propofol that killed Michael was administered by Michael himself. His people have NOT confirmed this, however.) --One thing he is not as confident about is his future in medicine. Authorities in California are already gunning for his medical license. --And he's afraid that if it gets revoked, the medical boards in Texas and Nevada . . . which is where he practices . . . will follow suit.


O.J. SIMPSON'S ACQUITTAL SUIT HAS FOUND A HOME:

The Armani suit that O.J. SIMPSON wore when he was acquitted of the murders of his ex-wife NICOLE and her friend RON GOLDMAN has found a home. --It's going to a place called the Newseum in Washington, D.C., which, according to its website, offers visitors, quote, "an experience that blends five centuries of news history with up-to-the-second technology and hands-on exhibits." (--You can check the place out here . . .) http://www.newseum.org/ --Mike Gilbert . . . a former manager of O.J.'s who has the suit . . . will deliver it in person next week. He says, quote, "I hope it will be displayed in a way that will help people ponder the legal system and celebrity. --"I'm happy that it will go somewhere where people can see it and remember where they were that day in history." --Gilbert had been battling over ownership of the suit with Ron Goldman's father, Fred, for the past 13 years. Both sides finally agreed to donate it to a museum so that nobody would profit from it.


HERE'S A PICTURE OF MARIAH CAREY SURFING . . . WITH HER DOGS:

MARIAH CAREY went surfing the other day in Puerto Rico . . . with her dogs. (--Here's what that looked like . . .)http://img.thesun.co.uk/multimedia/archive/01019/snf07bizmc1-682_1019607a.jpg


NICHOLAS BRENDON HAS BEEN CHARGED WITH BATTERY AGAINST POLICE OFFICERS:

Last month, former "Buffy the Vampire Slayer" actor NICHOLAS BRENDON was being drunk and disorderly in Venice, California. --Someone called the cops, but when they arrived, Brendon THREW PUNCHES, then tried to run away. So they chased him down and tasered him. TWICE. --Well, yesterday Brendon was charged with four misdemeanors . . . two counts of battery against a police officer, one count of resisting arrest and one count of vandalism. --He's looking at two years behind bars and a $4,000 fine if convicted.


WINONA RYDER WILL PLAY KEVIN JAMES' WIFE IN A MOVIE:

WINONA RYDER has signed on to play KEVIN JAMES' wife in a movie called "Cheaters". --The movie stars VINCE VAUGHN as a man who spots his buddy's wife with another guy . . . and has to decide whether or not to tell him. Kevin will play the friend, and Winona is his cheating wife, obviously. --RON HOWARD is directing. It's due in theaters sometime next year.


HARRISON FORD MIGHT BE IN "COWBOYS AND ALIENS":

This isn't definite yet, but there's some talk going around that HARRISON FORD might have joined the cast of "Cowboys and Aliens" . . . which is being made by "Iron Man" director JON FAVREAU. --"Cowboys and Aliens" is based on a graphic novel of the same name. (--"Graphic novel" is a term adults made up a while back so they didn't have to admit they were reading "comic books".) --It's an Old West story in which aliens invade Earth, and cowboys and Indians have to team up to beat them back. --DANIEL CRAIG and OLIVIA WILDE are already confirmed. (--The movie is due out next summer. We'll let you know if this Harrison Ford thing pans out.)


NICOLLETTE SHERIDAN HAS EXPLAINED HER "DESPERATE HOUSEWIVES" LAWSUIT . . . AND IS PREPARED FOR IT TO GET UGLY:

NICOLLETTE SHERIDAN filed a $20 MILLION lawsuit against "Desperate Housewives" creator MARC CHERRY on Monday . . . accusing him of assault and battery, gender violence and wrongful termination. (--Nicollette's character, Edie Britt, was killed off the show last year.) -Now, her lawyer, Mark Baute, has issued a statement explaining why she filed the lawsuit. In a nutshell, Nicollette took action because she felt someone needed to do something . . . and ABC failed to help her after a private complaint. --The statement reads, quote, "Nicollette worked very hard on the show and was a model employee. Mr. Cherry's behavior towards Nicollette was and is nothing short of abusive and appalling. --"The lawsuit is not something Nicollette wanted to do, it's something she felt compelled to do. [She] asked ABC for help and protection from Mr. Cherry's abusive behavior, and ultimately, ABC was not willing or able to provide that protection. --"Sometimes the only way that a safe and normal work environment can be created is when a hard-working person like Nicollette stands up for herself and her rights, and in doing so help protect others who have had to work in a hostile environment." --Baute also said that Nicollette knows that this may not be an easy battle . . . and says that she's prepared for this thing to get UGLY. --He said, quote, "We expect the case to be hard fought, and it will not be a surprise if ABC and Mr. Cherry try to depict Nicollette to be something other than a team player and long-standing industry professional." --By the way, the pointless comments from anonymous sources . . . supposedly "on the set" or otherwise "close to the show" . . . have already started rolling in. --And not surprisingly, it's split. One source told E! Online, quote, "[Cherry] has a crazy temper and is often not logical. He feels he doesn't have to answer to anyone." --But another told TMZ, quote, "Nothing like this ever happened. [I] never saw anything questionable or negative." And yet another added, quote, "It's something that would have been discussed had it happened." --Cherry has yet to release a statement . . . and it doesn't sound like he's going to. --When contacted, he's been pointing to the statement ABC Studios released on Monday night . . . saying that they did look into complaints that Nicollette made against Cherry, and they were, quote, "found to be without merit."


JON GOSSELIN IS PLANNING ON GOING AFTER KATE . . . FOR BEING AN "ABSENTEE PARENT" WHILE ON "DANCING WITH THE STARS":

JON GOSSELIN has essentially fallen off the face of the Earth recently . . . while KATE GOSSELIN landed a gig on "Dancing with the Stars", and has her own reality show in the pipeline at TLC. --And since these people are completely FULL OF THEMSELVES . . . it wouldn't be surprising to hear that Jon is jealous of Kate, and is thinking of taking some sort of action against her. And yes, that's exactly what's happening. --Jon's lawyer, Anthony F. List, says he'll file legal papers against Kate this week . . . accusing her of being a, quote, "absentee parent" during her time on "Dancing". --Because of that, Jon is seeking primary physical custody of their eight children . . . and wants to change the terms of their child support arrangement. --List says, quote, "He wants equal say with custody, equal time, but if the circumstances remain as they are, with Kate being rarely home, Jon wants primary custody of the children. He is much better able to spend time with the children. --"Kate Gosselin can't have it both ways unless there is some balance, unless there are some opportunities for these eight children to be in her physical presence. The eight children are the innocent victims. This tears Jon up." --Kate's lawyer has already responded . . . saying that Kate is a, quote, "devoted mother," and this lawsuit would be, quote, "reckless [and] offensive." --Meanwhile, some people claim that Jon may have picked NOW to call Kate out because he wants to sabotage any promotion she does for her new book, "I Just Want You to Know: Letters to My Kids on Love, Faith, and Family" . . . which comes out next Tuesday.


MAURA TIERNEY IS RETURNING TO TV:

Last year, MAURA TIERNEY was forced to give up a role on the new NBC show, "Parenthood", after she was diagnosed with breast cancer. (--Her part went to LAUREN GRAHAM.) -Well, Maura is ready to return to TV. Her rep says, quote, "She has finished treatment and is doing very well and is happy to move forward with the next phase of her life." --That "next phase" will begin with Maura jumping back into her recurring role as Kelly on "Rescue Me". According to "TV Guide", she's already filming scenes . . . but she won't appear on the show again until NEXT year, when Season Seven airs. (--Season Six will premiere later THIS year.)


GABOUREY SIDIBE'S MOM WILL BE ON "AMERICA'S GOT TALENT":

Alice Tan Ridley . . . the mother of "Precious" star and Academy Award nominee GABOUREY SIDIBE . . . will compete on the next season of "America's Got Talent", according to RadarOnline.com. --Alice, if you haven't heard, has been earning money singing in the New York City subway system . . . for the past 18 years. (--Her turf is the Times Square station, Penn Station and 14th Street / Union Square.) --She says, quote, "It's a big break for me and I would like to follow in SUSAN BOYLE'S footsteps and become a star in my own right." (--Here again is video of Alice singing in the subway . . .) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7gIfxjAK7qs


AND NOW . . . ADAM LAMBERT WILL BE A MENTOR ON "IDOL":

If you thought "American Idol" was jumping the shark by having 17-year-old MILEY CYRUS serve as a celebrity mentor for the contestants, check this out: --Next week's mentor will be: ADAM LAMBERT, who just finished second on "Idol" LAST SEASON. (--Maybe next week they could bring back DIDI BENAMI, who was eliminated last week.) --There's no word on what next week's theme will be. So technically, QUEEN Week, or Songs Off Adam Lambert's Debut Album Week are still possibilities. --On next Wednesday's show, Adam will perform "Whataya Want from Me". --By the way, here's some random trivia: Last week, a "Dancing with the Stars" episode beat both of that week's episodes of "Idol" for the first time EVER. --It didn't happen head-to-head though. Monday's episode of "Dancing" attracted 23 million viewers . . . while Tuesday's "Idol" had 21.9 million viewers and Wednesday's "Idol" had 20.5 million.



NAZZY’S RANDOM STUFF

HERE ARE A BUNCH OF STATS FROM THE 2010 "MAXIM" SEX SURVEY:

Now it's time to review some highlights of the 2010 "Maxim" magazine sex survey:
--47% of women admit to "sexting," and 70% admit they've hacked into their man's email account to make sure he wasn't cheating.--70% of women say they've slept with ten or fewer guys.--17% of women have had sex with a guy whose name they didn't know. And 26% slept with a guy they knew for less than five hours.--ONE in FOUR women say they love . . . not just like, LOVE . . . giving oral favors. --11% of women have slept with their boss at some point, and 6% have slept with a subordinate at work.--17% have done it with a guy they knew was married.--If they had the chance, and it was guaranteed their guy would never find out, 38% of women say they'd have sex with their, quote, "fantasy crush."--ONE in THREE women have no problem going all the way on a first date with a guy they really like.--31% of women have had sex with TWO or more men in one day. And 1.5% have done the nasty with more than THREE guys in a day. When you up the timeframe to a week, 17% have done it with three or more guys.--More than TWO-THIRDS of women have never had a threesome. As for the rest of them . . . 17% did it with two girls and one guy, 11% did it with two guys and one girl, and 3% did it with THREE GIRLS. (!!!)--ONE in THREE women think the "average guy" should have sex with six to ten women before settling down. 2% think he should be a virgin when he gets married. 1% thinks he should have sex with 40 or more women before getting married. --Overall, 7% of women say a guy's muscle tone and fitness isn't important to them at all. And 5% say the size of a guy's DONG doesn't matter at all. (Maxim)


YOU CAN CHECK "MARRIED" ON THE CENSUS FORM IF YOU'RE GAY . . . AND OTHER STUFF YOU MIGHT NOT KNOW ABOUT THIS YEAR'S CENSUS:

Last month, the U.S. Census Bureau sent out the 2010 census forms. Here are a few things you might not know about it:
#1.) About HALF of all Americans have already sent in their census forms, even though they aren't technically due until the end of the month. --If you don't send in the form by then, you can probably expect someone from the Census Bureau to come knocking at your door.
#2.) Officials say it costs $57 to send a census taker to just ONE house. And for every 1% of the population that returns the form on their own, the government saves $85 MILLION.
#3.) If you decide you're NEVER going to send in your census form, the Frequently Asked Questions section of the Census Bureau's website points out that you can be fined up to $5,000. But it's something that's only viewed as a, quote, "last resort."
#4.) And if they consider themselves married, for the first time ever, same-sex couples are being told to check the "husband" or "wife" boxes instead of the one marked "unmarried partner" . . . even if they aren't LEGALLY married. --A lot of people are upset about the change because they think it legitimizes gay marriage. But according to a Census Bureau official, quote, "We're treating the gay community the same as other segments of the population. --"There's a respect factor there. We've never asked people to show us their marriage licenses. We don't do that for straight people." --Whatever your opinion on THAT line of reasoning, surely you can still appreciate the delicious gayness of GEORGE TAKEI, and his PSA in support of the move. --Takei and his husband, Brad Altman, shot a public service announcement for a group called the Equal Roots Coalition. In the video, George is rocking his old Starfleet uniform, and Brad's wearing a phallic-shaped tin foil hat. --The point is to get as many same-sex couples as possible to check the "married" boxes on their census forms as part of a campaign called Queer the Census. (ABC News / Newser)(--You can watch George and Brad's PSA here . . .)http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yGuc0q9_QWg


TWO WOMEN WERE ARRESTED FOR TRYING TO SNEAK THEIR DEAD RELATIVE ONTO A PLANE:

Remember the dumb '80s comedy "Weekend at Bernie's", where the two guys pretend their dead boss is still alive? It's such a ridiculous movie because the premise is so unbelievable. But that's what made it funny. Sort of. --Anyway, on Saturday, 66-year-old Gitta Jarant and her daughter, 41-year-old Anke Anusic, were arrested at the airport in Liverpool, England. --Apparently they were trying to sneak a relative of theirs onto a plane headed to Berlin. His name was 91-year-old Curt Jarant. And he was DEAD. --According to authorities, the two women placed Curt in a wheelchair and put sunglasses on his face. But the disguise didn't work, because a security guard noticed Curt wasn't moving, and became suspicious. --Officials say Gitta and Anke are both German, and they were trying to avoid the costs of transporting a dead body. But they swear they thought Curt was just asleep. --Anke says, quote, "They would think that for 24 hours we would carry a dead person? This is ridiculous. He was moving, he was breathing . . . He was alive. He was pale but he wasn't dead. --"A dead person you cannot carry to Germany, there are too many people checking and security. How can you bring a dead person to Germany?" (--Obviously, not like this, Anke.) --Gitta and Anke were both arrested and charged with suspicion of failing to give notification of death. They've been released on bail, and are expected back in court on June 1st. (BBC News / Guardian)


A WOMAN CALLED 911 BECAUSE SHE THOUGHT HER DAUGHTER HAD BEEN SHOT . . . BUT IT WAS JUST AN APRIL FOOLS' JOKE:

Meet 32-year-old Tiffany Moreland of Lorain, Ohio (--25 miles west of Cleveland). --Last week, Tiffany decided to pull an April Fools' joke on her mom, and asked her 12-year-old nephew if he wanted to help prank his grandma. So the kid called his grandmother at work, and told her that his mother had been shot. Hilarious, right? --Understandably, the grandmother started freaking out. But before the kid could tell her it was just an April Fools' joke, she hung up and called 911. --A few minutes later, a bunch of cops showed up at the family home. And when they realized it was just a joke, they arrested Tiffany and charged her with false alarm. --According to a police spokesman, quote, "Practical jokes have gone bad before, and people have gotten in trouble. But this is the first time I've dealt with something like this. The grandma didn't think it was funny, either. She was quite upset." --For the record, Tiffany says she's done with April Fools' jokes from now on. (Morning Journal / WEWS News 5 - Cleveland)


THE MOST HATED COMPANY IN AMERICA IS . . . FREDDIE MAC:

Every year, Harris Interactive releases something called the corporate reputation survey. The idea is to find out how Americans view some of the world's largest companies. --In this year's survey, Google, Johnson & Johnson, General Mills and Warren Buffett's Berkshire Hathaway are all viewed as having some of the BEST reputations. But that's not nearly as interesting as the companies Americans HATE.
--Here are the ten most hated companies in America:#1.) Freddie Mac#2.) American International Group . . . a.k.a. AIG#3.) Fannie Mae#4.) Citigroup#5.) Goldman Sachs#6.) Chrysler#7.) General Motors#8.) JP Morgan Chase#9.) Bank of America#10.) Delta Airlines--Delta's the only company on the list that didn't receive federal bailout money. All the others accepted between $10 BILLION and $75 BILLION each. And according to its new score, Freddie Mac is the most hated company since Enron in 2005. (Huffington Post / Adweek)


DEEPAK CHOPRA SAYS HE CAUSED THE EARTHQUAKE IN BAJA BY MEDITATING TOO HARD:

You might be under the impression that EARTHQUAKES are caused by plate shifts deep beneath the surface of the earth. But you'd be wrong . . . they're caused by DEEPAK CHOPRA. (???) At least that's what he says. --Just after Sunday's earthquake along the California-Mexico border, Chopra posted on Twitter that he, quote, "Had a powerful meditation just now -- caused an earthquake in Southern California." --A few minutes later, he posted another tweet reading, quote, "Was meditating on Shiva mantra & earth began to shake. Sorry about that." --Then he promised a follower on Twitter that he, quote, "Won't do it again -- promise." --And on Monday morning, Chopra posted a fourth tweet reading, quote, "Some people were upset at my remarks re earthquake. Sorry about that. I was actually meditating when it happened and thought 'Whoaaa!'" --Authorities say at least two people were killed in the quake, and hundreds more were injured. (AOL News)


A GUY DISLOCATED HIS JAW EATING A SUPERSIZED SANDWICH:

38-year-old Chad Ettmueller lives in Cumming, Georgia (--about 50 miles northeast of Atlanta). --Recently, he took his family to a restaurant called Which 'Wich, and ordered his favorite sandwich . . . a five-meat three-cheese behemoth called the "Wicked." --Then, since Chad hadn't eaten all day, he doubled the meat and cheese. It was a massive sandwich. So big, in fact, that when Chad opened his mouth to take a bite, he DISLOCATED HIS JAW. --Now, ordinarily this is the part in the story where Chad files a lawsuit against Which 'Wich for injuring him. But that's not what happened. As Chad put it, quote, "It wasn't the sandwich's fault, it was my genetics." --Officials for Which 'Wich say they're now considering three new names for the sandwich . . . the "Lockjaw," the "Double Dislocator" and the "Jaw Wrecker." --According to a statement from Which 'Wich, quote, "In our six years of operating Which Wich we have never heard anything quite like this. We are happy to report that Chad is in good spirits and his jaw is healing. --In the meantime, we are just supplying him with as many milkshakes as he wants." (AOL News)


HERE ARE SIX THINGS WAITERS WON'T TELL YOU:

"Reader's Digest" asked two-dozen waiters and waitresses from around the country to tell them things they normally wouldn't reveal to customers. Here are the top six . . .
#1.) AFTER 8 P.M., IT'S ALL DECAF. Apparently, people who work nights at restaurants are really lazy. According to one waitress, most restaurants only brew decaf coffee after eight o'clock because no one wants to clean two coffee pots. --So, even if you order a regular coffee, you'll get decaf because they know you can't tell the difference.
#2.) SOMETIMES THE "DAILY SPECIAL" IS JUST A BUNCH OF OLD FOOD. You've probably heard this before, but 'specials' are often just a way to get rid of food that's about to go bad. So avoid the soup of the day, especially if it has seafood in it.
#3.) YOU SHOULD NEVER ORDER A LEMON IN YOUR DRINK. According to a waitress from Kansas City, nobody washes them, and everybody touches them. They just cut them up and throw them in your drink.
#4.) THE EGGS AT A BREAKFAST BUFFET ARE ALMOST ALWAYS MADE FROM POWDER. They just mix it with water to make liquid eggs that they can scramble. Making real eggs is more expensive, and it takes A LOT longer.
#5.) THEY PUT EXTRA SUGAR IN THE KIDS' FOOD. A waitress at a, quote, "well-known pizza chain" says they put more sugar in the dough for kids' pizzas because they know kids will eat more if they do.
#6.) WEALTHY PEOPLE DON'T TIP THAT WELL. Middle-class people leave the best tips. And guys tend to throw down between 20 and 25 percent if they're out on a date. (Reader's Digest)


NAZZY'S SILLY VIDEOS OF THE DAY

#1.) A DRUGGED UP GIRL TALKED ABOUT UNICORNS AND RAPPED ABOUT JESUS AFTER HAVING HER WISDOM TEETH REMOVED:
A teenage girl woke up from having her wisdom teeth removed and said, "I feel like a unicorn just took me on a ride to a magical palace." Then she started rapping about Jesus. It seems like she's TRYING to act weird, but it's still amusing. (--Search for "girl trips after wisdom teeth removal." She starts rapping at 1:00. Here's the video, and the famous "David After Dentist" video.)http://www.break.com/index/girl-trips-after-wisdom-teeth-removal.htmlhttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=txqiwrbYGrs

#2.) A KID BOUGHT AN iPAD, THEN IMMEDIATELY SMASHED IT WITH A BAT:
Some kid bought an iPad, then he and his friends tossed it on the sidewalk and destroyed it with a baseball bat. (--Search for "brand new iPad smashed baseball bat." They start smashing it at :27.) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XGUppxoJUVg

#3.) A COLLEGE MATH PROFESSOR MADE IT LOOK LIKE HE WAS ARGUING WITH HIS SHADOW DURING A LECTURE:
A dorky math professor was projecting his desktop on a screen during a lecture, and made it look like his shadow could move around by itself. Then he pretended to argue with it. Then another shadow arrived, and dismissed the students for Spring Break. (--Search for "math teacher shadow trick during lecture." The second shadow arrives at 1:38.) http://www.break.com/index/math-teacher-shadow-trick-during-lecture.html

FOUR THINGS YOU DIDN'T KNOW ABOUT SOFT DRINKS:

The Congressional Budget office predicts that a three-cent tax on soda will generate $24 billion over the next four years. Here are four other things about soft drinks you might not know. . .
#1.) THE AVERAGE AMERICAN DRINKS 57 GALLONS OF SODA A YEAR. That's over 600 cans. And 21% of the sugar in an average American's diet comes from soft drinks. Ireland is in second place. The average person there drinks 355 cans a year.
#2.) "COKE" IS THE SECOND MOST RECOGNIZED WORD IN THE WORLD.Worldwide, over 10,000 Coca-Cola products are consumed every SECOND. That's about one billion every day. --And 94% of people in the world recognize the Coca-Cola logo. The only word more recognized around the world than "Coke" is "Okay."
#3.) DIFFERENT SODAS HAVE DIFFERENT AMOUNTS OF CAFFEINE. Regular Pepsi has 38 milligrams of caffeine, and DIET Pepsi has slightly less, with 35 milligrams. Coke has 34 milligrams, but for some reason, DIET Coke has 45.6. -Dr. Pepper and Diet Dr. Pepper both have 41 milligrams of caffeine. Mountain Dew has the most, with 55 milligrams. Sprite, 7-Up, and root beer have none.
#4.) DRINKING SODA MAKES YOU SICK. In February, researchers announced that drinking just two cans of soda per week increases your risk of developing pancreatic cancer by 87%. --Drinking two soft drinks a DAY makes you 85% more likely to develop gout, which is like really bad arthritis. And drinking ONE soda per day makes a child 60% more likely to be obese when he grows up. (OnlineSchools.org)