Friday, September 2, 2011

HOLLYWOOD DIRT OVERFLOW (09-02-11)

Jada Pinkett and Marc Anthony Were Touchy-Feely on the Set of "HawthoRNe . . . But they Didn't Have Sex:

People are still trying to connect JADA PINKETT and MARC ANTHONY, and blame their supposed affair for the breakup of Marc and J-LO'S marriage . . . as well as the near-breakup of Jada and WILL SMITH. --But now, "Us Weekly" says there were NO sexual shenanigans on the set of their TV show "HawthoRNe". But that doesn't mean Jada and Marc were completely innocent. --A source says, quote, "They were a little touchy and like they were in their own little world." They also spent a lot of time alone in Marc's trailer . . . and they talked and texted frequently. (--I'd take "HawthoRNe" rumors with a grain of salt though. Especially since their characters were having a SCRIPTED affair on the show.) --Meanwhile, in his interview with ABC News yesterday, Marc flat-out denied he cheated with ANYBODY. He said, quote, "It was a flight attendant, it was the pilot . . . I heard it was this guy sitting next to me in a rehab in Houston. I've heard it all." --He added, quote, "People are trying to peg it on things because it was so shocking. It was like, it must have been something . . . It wasn't something sensationalistic." (--You can watch several clips from the interview here.)


Showbiz Photo of the Day: Prince Harry and the Unfortunately-Placed Balloon:

PRINCE HARRY was at a charity event called The Wellchild Awards in London on Wednesday, and someone gave him a balloon sculpture . . . if that's what you'd call it. --It looks like it's supposed to be a flower on a stem or something. But in one picture, the way he's holding it is rather unfortunate . . . and HILARIOUS. Hopefully, the little girl standing directly in front of him didn't catch the symbolism.
(--Here's the pic.) (D-Listed)


Lindsay Lohan Now Has a Tattoo of a Billy Joel Lyric:

LINDSAY LOHAN has a new tattoo on her ribcage . . . and it's a BILLY JOEL LYRIC. (--Here's a picture.) (TMZ) --The tattoo reads, quote, "Clear as a crystal, sharp as a knife, I feel like I'm in the prime of my life." It's a line from Joel's 1989 song "I Go to Extremes". --A source says she chose it because, quote, "It represented where she is in life and everything she's been through . . . it signifies that she's focused." (--I don't know if it matters, but Lindsay and Billy are fellow Long Islanders . . . although Billy was born in the Bronx.)


Heather Morris from "Glee" Did a "Controversial" Photo Shoot With a Black Eye:

A new photo shoot featuring "Glee" star HEATHER MORRIS is causing some controversy, because she's done up kind of like a Barbie doll . . . but with a BLACK EYE. --To make matters worse, there's one photo where Heather's hands appear to be bound, and she's biting the cord of an iron . . . which is being held by what looks like a man's hand. --People are already complaining that the pictures glorify domestic abuse. --The pics were taken by TYLER SHIELDS. He's the photographer who does those crazy photos of LINDSAY LOHAN where she's holding guns and bloody knives and that kind of stuff. --He says, quote, "In no way were we promoting domestic violence. We wanted to do a bruised-up Barbie shoot and that's exactly what we did!" (--Here are the pics.) (TylerShields.com)


Madonna Doesn't Let Anyone Else Use Her Toilet . . . Not Even Her Kids or Her Boyfriend:

If you ever have to go to the bathroom really badly, you'd better hope MADONNA'S toilet isn't the only one unoccupied. Because she won't let you use it. --According to "In Touch Weekly", Madonna doesn't let ANYBODY use her toilet. A source says, quote, "Madonna doesn't even let her kids use her toilet. It's just her thing. She is very generous, but this is the one thing she doesn't want to share."


Brad and Angelina's Daughter Shiloh Has Her Own iPad:

If you're like most Americans, you probably still don't have your own iPad. Too expensive, right? --Well, BRAD PITT and ANGELINA JOLIE'S daughter Shiloh has one. And she's FIVE YEARS OLD. (--Check out a picture.) (Life And Style) --A source says, quote, "Angelina loaded it up with a ton of apps and games for her. It definitely will keep her busy for the thousands of miles they travel each week." --Here's something else Shiloh has that you don't: A Shetland pony. Brad reportedly bought one for each kid . . . plus a horse for Angelina. (--You can read more about that here.)
NEW MOVIES THIS WEEKEND

Helen Mirren Plays a Spy and Katharine McPhee is Attacked by Sharks!

#1.) "The Debt" (R) (Opened Wednesday)

Helen Mirren, Tom Wilkinson, and Ciaran Hinds are former Mossad agents whose mission to hunt down a Nazi war criminal in the '60s may not have been the huge success everyone thought it was. --In the flashback scenes they're played by Jessica Chastain from "The Help", a New Zealand actor named Marton Csokas, and "Avatar's" Sam Worthington. You may remember Csokas as one of the elf lords, Celeborn, in "The Lord of the Rings". (Trailer)


#2.) "Shark Night 3D" (PG-13)

A group of college students are trapped on an island surrounded by a lake that's been stocked with hungry sharks. 3D carnage ensues. The doomed cast includes Katharine McPhee, who parlayed her "American Idol" fame into an acting career. --McPhee's done some minor TV appearances, but this is her first big role since she was in theaters in "The House Bunny". She was runner-up to forgotten "Idol" winner Taylor Hicks on the fifth season of the show back in 2006. --It's directed by the guy who did the second and fourth "Final Destination" movies, director David Ellis. More importantly, he also did "Snakes on a Plane" . . . which is why I need so bad to believe they'll include the line, "Enough is enough! I've had it with these mother[effin] sharks on this mother[effin] lake." (Trailer)


#3.) "Apollo 18" (PG-13)

The last official lunar mission was Apollo 17, but this sci-fi horror film is about a secret 18th mission, where two American astronauts were sent back to the moon to find out what happened to some missing cosmonauts. (Trailer #1) (Trailer #2)


George Lucas Spoke Out Against Altering Movies . . . 23 Years Ago:

GEORGE LUCAS has been enraging "Star Wars" fans for years now, by making changes to the movies every time he re-releases them either to theaters, or in a new format. --Just this week, he caused yet another disturbance in The Force with a change he made to the Blu-ray edition of "Return of the Jedi". --Well, are you ready for some MASSIVE IRONY? Back in 1988, when colorizing black and white movies was popular, Lucas spoke in front of Congress AGAINST ruining old movies by altering them from their original forms. --Here's a part of his speech that seems particularly hypocritical . . . quote, "These current defacements are just the beginning. --"Today, engineers with their computers can add color to black-and-white movies, change the soundtrack, speed up the pace, and add or subtract material to the philosophical tastes of the copyright holder. --"Tomorrow, more advanced technology will be able to replace actors with 'fresher faces', or alter dialogue and change the movement of the actor's lips to match." --He added, quote, "I accuse the corporations, who oppose the moral rights of the artist, of being dishonest and insensitive to American cultural heritage and of being interested only in their quarterly bottom line, and not in the long-term interest of the Nation." --Here's another noteworthy passage . . . quote, "Attention should be paid to this question of our soul, and not simply to accounting procedures. --"Attention should be paid to the interest of those who are yet unborn, who should be able to see this generation as it saw itself, and the past generation as it saw itself." --Now, it's important to note here that George's main focus in this address was to protect the rights of the AUTHOR of a particular work of art from having his or her vision tampered with by someone else. --In that respect, there's no hypocrisy, because Lucas is the sole emperor of the "Star Wars" universe. -But he really did seem to be AGAINST the kind of tampering he keeps doing to the "Star Wars" movies as new technology allows. -At this rate, the "unborn" he spoke of probably CAN'T see any of the "Star Wars" movies as they were originally released, which the 1988 George Lucas seemed vehemently against. --With George there's kind of an interesting dynamic . . . because he's both the artist / creator AND, in the eyes of many "Star Wars" fans, the shameless corporation that tampers with said artist's vision. --You have to kind of pity "Star Wars" fans. The man who basically wrote their Bible is also the man they accuse of desecrating their faith. It's tough being a geek. (???) (--You can read his whole speech here.) --By the way . . . the efforts of George and his fellow filmmakers did result in the creation of the National Film Registry . . . which takes historically significant movies and preserves them in their natural state forever.
"DANCING WITH THE LGBT"

Lacey Schwimmer Says the "Controversy" Over Chaz Bono Doing "Dancing with the Stars" Is "Not Cool":

LACEY SCHWIMMER . . . CHAZ BONO'S partner on "Dancing with the Stars" . . . doesn't like the "controversy" over Chaz doing the show.--She says, quote, "It's disappointing. No human is perfect, so why are they pointing out what they perceive to be an imperfection in someone else? It's not cool. --"We're all taught to not bully, or harass, and treat everyone as equals yet all these people are doing exactly the opposite . . . just accept him for him. We need to evolve. It's 2011. I personally feel that we need to get over it." --Lacey says she was "absolutely thrilled" to be paired with Chaz, and adds, quote, "I've always been a huge supporter of the LGBT community and I couldn't be more excited to have Chaz . . . [he's] a cool person." (--In Season Seven, Lacey was paired with the openly gay LANCE BASS.) -For those who are looking forward to seeing Chaz tearin' it up on the dance floor, here's Lacey's assessment of how he's doing: --Quote, "He's picking up choreography very easily, but his stamina was very low. So we've been putting him through drills that will make him stronger in the competition. It's all about him being able to breathe and get through a full dance."


"Dancing with the Stars" Considered Pairing Carson Kressley with a Guy:

For better or worse, "Dancing with the Stars" ignited some LGBT . . . discussion . . . by bringing CHAZ BONO onboard this season. But they almost took the full plunge. --The cast also includes former "Queer Eye" star CARSON KRESSLEY . . . who's openly gay, of course . . . and the show's executive producer Conrad Green says that they DID consider pairing him up with a dude. --Green says, quote, "We thought about it . . . [but] we try to follow what happens in real ballroom competitions. That was the original intention of the show. --"And while we are aware that there are same-sex couples, the competitions are usually mixed-gendered." --So in the end he says they decided, quote, "It's a performance, like actors, so we don't think it's odd pairing up dancers with incompatible sexual preferences, but based off abilities."


Bodog.com's "Dancing with the Stars" Odds Are Up, and Chaz Bono Is the Biggest Long Shot to Win:

Bodog.com has put out their early lines on "Dancing with the Stars" . . . and shockingly, CHAZ BONO is not the favorite. In fact, he's the BIGGEST long shot, both literally and figuratively. His odds are 20-to-1. --The best odds were given to GEORGE CLOONEY'S ex, ELISABETTA CANALIS, who's at 3-to-1. Perhaps the thinking there is: You can't date a refined gentleman like George without knowing how to dance. (--At this point, that's my only guess . . . because that's the only thing anybody knows about this woman. So, if she's not a "star" . . . maybe she's an awesome dancer? I don't know. Anyway . . .)

--Here's Bodog.com's complete ranking:

--Elisabetta Canalis and Val Chmerkovskiy, 3/1

--Former "Queer Eye" star Carson Kressley and Anna Trebunskaya, 4/1

--Kristin Cavallari and Mark Ballas, 5/1

--Singer Chynna Phillips and Tony Dovolani, 6/1

--Rob Kardashian and Cheryl Burke, 15/2 . . . or 7.5/1

--Soccer minx Hope Solo and Maksim Chmerkovskiy, 8/1

--David Arquette and Kym Johnson, 10/1

--L.A. Laker Ron Artest and Peta Murgatroyd, 10/1

--Soap star and Iraq war veteran J.R. Martinez and Karina Smirnoff, 12/1

--Ricki Lake and Derek Hough, 15/1

--Nancy Grace and Tristan MacManus, 18/1

--Chaz Bono and Lacey Schwimmer, 20/1

(--I feel for the FOOLS who made these odds, because they're going to feel so stupid when Chaz wins it all! Hit up Bodog.com if you want to check for updates on the odds . . . or if you actually want to place a bet.)

--For the record, here's what Bodog had to say about putting Chaz last: Quote, "The clear underdog is Chaz Bono at 20-1 who does not look to be in great shape and may not appeal to the masses who vote on this. --"But realistically, until we see the first show we are making a lot of assumptions . . . and that is why we tend not to go any higher than 20-1 before we see how good or bad some of these contestants are." --Bodog even points out: BRISTOL PALIN started out at 30-to-1 last season, but ended up coming in third.


"Grey's Anatomy" Has Been the Most-TiVo'd Show Over the Past Four Years:

TiVo began compiling data on the most recorded TV shows back in October of 2007, and now they're reporting that the most TiVo'd show over the past four years was: "Grey's Anatomy". Here's the Top 10:

1.) "Grey's Anatomy" (ABC)

2.) "American Idol" (Fox)

3.) "Desperate Housewives" (ABC)

4.) "House" (Fox)

5.) "Lost" (ABC)

6.) "CSI" (CBS)

7.) "24" (Fox)

8.) "Heroes" (NBC)

9.) "The Office" (NBC)

10.) "Glee" (Fox)

--Since this list came from TiVo, it's unclear if this list covers ALL DVRs, or just the ones that are linked to TiVo. It's also vague as to whether this was pulled from exact tracking, or just an estimate based on reports from a sample of users.


WEEKEND TV REMINDERS


Friday TV Reminders:


--"Friends with Benefits" . . . 8:30 to 9:00 P.M. on NBC. (--Sara reunites with her ex, who's played by Pete Wentz.)


--"Karaoke Battle USA" [Performance Show] . . . 9:00 to 10:00 P.M. on ABC.


--"Man, Woman, Wild" [2nd Season Premiere]. . . 9:00 to 10:00 P.M. on Discovery.





Saturday TV Reminders:


--"Biography: Andre the Giant" . . . 7:00 A.M. to 8:00 A.M. on A&E.


--"Grand Ole Opry Live" . . . 7:00 to 9:00 P.M. on GAC. (--Connie Smith, Wynn Varble, Billy Dean and Elizabeth Cook perform.)


--"Austin City Limits" . . . 9:00 to 10:00 P.M. on PBS. (--Roy Orbison performs.) (REPEAT)


--"Rock 'n' Roll Fantasy Camp" . . . 10:00 to 11:00 P.M. on VH1 Classic. (--Drummer Marky Ramone is the guest teacher / mentor.)


--"That Metal Show" . . . 11:00 P.M. to Midnight on VH1 Classic. (--Guitarist Tom Morello from Rage Against the Machine, and Doug Pinnick from King's X.)

--"Saturday Night Live" . . . 11:30 P.M. to 1:00 A.M. on NBC. (--Zach Galifianakis guest hosts and Jessie J is the musical guest.) (REPEAT)


Sunday TV Reminders:


--"Big Brother 13" [Eviction Nominations] . . . 8:00 to 9:00 P.M. on CBS.


--"Sunday Best" [4th Season Finale] . . . 8:00 to 10:00 P.M. on BET.


--"9/11: Heroes of the 88th Floor" . . . 9:00 to 11:00 P.M. on TLC. (--A documentary on construction workers who saved 77 people from the North Tower.)


--"The Good Wife: A New Beginning" . . . 9:30 to 10:00 P.M. on CBS. (--The show's first two seasons are discussed with the cast and the executive producer.)


--"In the Flow with Affion Crockett" . . . 9:30 to 10:00 P.M. on Fox. (--Wendi McLendon-Covey, Lil C and "Glee's" Harry Shum Jr. guest star.)


--"Behind the Music Remastered" . . . 10:00 to 11:00 P.M. on VH1. (--Rick James is profiled.)
Videos of Justin Timberlake Performing with a Band Called FreeSol:

JUSTIN TIMBERLAKE hasn't been in "music mode" for a while now, but on Wednesday night he performed with a Memphis band called FREESOL in New York. --It happened at his restaurant, Southern Hospitality, and the band is one of Justin's protégés. He "executive produced" their upcoming debut album, which comes out next month, and he "co-directed" a few of their videos. --During their gig Wednesday night, Justin played the keyboard on some of their tracks . . . did some rapping . . . and busted out an acoustic version of his 2007 single "What Goes Around . . . Comes Around". (--Here's some random footage of Justin taken from OUTSIDE the restaurant, through the window. And here's a video of Justin performing from inside the venue. Here's another fan video of that. And here's video of Justin rapping.) (--Unfortunately, the audio isn't good on any of these.)


Watch Marilyn Manson's New Video, Which Was Directed By Shia LaBeouf:

MARILYN MANSON had SHIA LABEOUF direct his "Born Villain" video, and the results have made their way online. Not surprisingly, it's extremely dark and creepy. (--You can check it out, here . . . if you want to.) (--WARNING: This video isn't for everyone. It's mostly just dark, like a horror movie . . . but there is a pretty graphic moment at the 4:17 mark, when you can see a needle going through a girl's face.) (--There's also a lot of NUDITY . . . and the lyrics include PROFANITY.) (--Shia and Marilyn Manson have been hanging out a lot recently. Shia is shooting a documentary on the making of Marilyn's new album, and recently we heard that Shia got hammered and spit water in Marilyn's face.)


Justin Bieber's Christmas Album Will Feature All Original Songs:

When we first heard that JUSTIN BIEBER was recording a Christmas album, it was supposed to have both "classics and some originals." But now, his manager says it will only have new songs. --He Tweeted, quote, "This Christmas album is amazing. Might be the best album yet. All originals . . . soon to be classics. Everyone I play it for is blown away." --And Justin's producer had also hinted that it might feature TAYLOR SWIFT. He previously Tweeted, quote, "Wow!! Got to see Justin and Taylor Swift write a song together last night!!! SMASH!!!! SMASH!!! SMASH!!! Let's do it again y'all!!!" (--He sounds like a very excitable guy.)


Lenny Kravitz Used to Be High "All the Time":

If you discovered LENNY KRAVITZ in the '90s, and your first impression was: "Man, this guy seems like he's high all the time" . . . then you were SPOT ON. --Lenny tells "Men's Journal", quote, "I had to surround myself with energy and chaos and excitement and conflict. For a bit, I was high all the time, just medicating . . . I suppose that was so I didn't have to feel certain things." --Lenny didn't elaborate on how long "a bit" is . . . so it could've been 10 to 15 years. --But Lenny says he sobered up about a decade ago when his then-11-year-old daughter Zoe Kravitz came to live with him. He says, quote, "It was the best thing that happened. I had to change my life . . . if that hadn't happened, I don't know where I'd be now."


Vince Neil Says You've Gotta Sober Up to Extend Your Career:

MOTLEY CRUE singer VINCE NEIL is 50 years old, and he says in order to be a musician at 50, you can't still be acting like a musician who's 25. --He says that young musicians often get sucked into the alcohol . . . the drugs . . . and the women, because their fame comes "all of a sudden." --But Vince adds, quote, "The smart ones know that you can't live that lifestyle . . . you can't keep going. If you want to have longevity in this business, or any business, you've gotta grow up . . . eventually."


Donny Osmond Would Like to See Tim McGraw on "Dancing with the Stars":

DONNY OSMOND won "Dancing with the Stars" back in 2009 . . . so that makes him an authority on who should be on future shows, right? He seems to think so. Somebody asked Donny to toss out a casting suggestion and he said, quote, "I think TIM MCGRAW. --"As a matter of fact, I was at Tim's show the other night, and I got onstage with him, and the crowd was going crazy. I said, 'You know, Tim's in pretty good shape here. He's got his muscles and the whole bit. I think he should do 'Dancing With the Stars'." (--Donny's dreaming on this one. These days those "stars" are either over the hill, or they're showbiz wannabes. Tim's career does NOT need a boost. You can check for yourself with this season's cast list.)
FRIDAY'S SHOWBIZ EXTRAS


Showbiz Extras . . . Random Links to Additional Stories:


After 28 years together, GENE SIMMONS and SHANNON TWEED have set an October 1st date for their wedding. (Full Story)



Just six months after giving birth, KATE HUDSON is back in a bikini. (Full Story)



The woman who ruined TIKI BARBER'S marriage is going to become his second wife. They're engaged. (Full Story)



KATT WILLIAMS issued a PARTIAL apology for ripping on a Mexican audience member during his standup gig in Phoenix last Saturday. I say "partial" because what he said was, quote, "I want to apologize if my comedy act was taken out of context." (Full Story)



African-American actor MICHAEL COLYAR claims he was kicked off a United Airlines flight for BEING BLACK. (Full Story)



Remember when everybody thought ARETHA FRANKLIN was at death's door? Well, she's going to perform before PRESIDENT OBAMA gives a speech in Detroit on Monday. (Full Story)


RANDOM STUFF

Washington, D.C. Has the Most Dangerous Drivers in America . . . and Fort Collins, Colorado Has the Safest:

Allstate Insurance just released their seventh annual list of U.S. cities based on the safety of their drivers. And this year's city with the most dangerous drivers is . . . Washington, D.C.

--Drivers in D.C. are 107.3% more likely than the average driver to get into a collision. They also average 4.8 years between crashes, the smallest time frame in the country. D.C. was also the most dangerous city last year.

--The rest of the bottom ten are: Baltimore . . . Glendale, California . . . Newark, New Jersey . . . Providence, Rhode Island . . . Philadelphia . . . Hartford, Connecticut . . . Jersey City, New Jersey . . . San Francisco . . . and Alexandria, Virginia.

--On the other end of things, Fort Collins, Colorado was the safest city in the country, for the second time in the seven years Allstate's been doing the study.

--Drivers in Fort Collins are 28.6% less likely than the average driver to get in an accident, and they average 14 years between crashes.

--The rest of the top ten are: Boise, Idaho . . . Lincoln, Nebraska . . . Chandler, Arizona . . . Huntsville, Alabama . . . Knoxville, Tennessee . . . Springfield, Missouri . . . Reno, Nevada . . . Eugene, Oregon . . . and Chattanooga, Tennessee.

--Nationwide, the average driver gets into an accident about once every 10 years. (Allstate)



A Town in California Decided to Focus on Accident Prevention Instead of Giving Out Traffic Tickets . . . and Accidents Went Down:

I want to tell this story to every single mayor, city council, police commissioner, and police officer in the country. -Writing a bunch of tickets doesn't do a DAMN THING to make roads safer. And if cities focused less on taking our hard-earned money because we forgot to signal, and focused on actually studying safety, it would CHANGE THE WORLD -There's a town just north of Sacramento, California called Roseville. And at the beginning of the year, their city manager, Ray Kerridge, told the police to stop writing so many tickets. --He said he wanted them to focus on long-term safety solutions . . . like identifying dangerous areas on the roads and fixing them. He didn't want the cops spending all day ticketing people, and he didn't want people worrying about speed traps. --In the first six months of the year, the cops only wrote 1,317 tickets . . . down 84% from the 8,236 tickets issued in the first six months of 2010. And . . . ACCIDENTS WENT DOWN BY 7%. --The chief of police, Daniel Hahn, says that by not writing a ton of tickets, they can actually identify the dangerous intersections and roads. And they can come up with answers, like adding a light, putting up a median, or beefing up police presence. --Of course, fewer tickets means less revenue for the city . . . but it means fewer accidents and more people ALIVE . . . which SHOULD be the correct choice in every case. (MSN Money)


How Much of Your Salary Would You Be Willing to Give Up for More Flexible Hours?

We all dream about working from home, or four-day work weeks, or setting our own hours. But would you be willing to take a PAY CUT to make it happen? --The majority of the country says . . . NO. But 42% say YES. That's two out of five working adults. --The average person would be willing to give up about 6% of their salary for more flexibility at work. With a $50,000-a-year job, that's a $3,000 pay cut. --Men are actually TWICE as likely as women to say they'd give up more of their salary. 12% of men would give up 10% of their salary for more flexibility . . . only 6% of women would give up 10% of their salary for that flexibility. --People 18-to-34 are more than THREE TIMES more likely than older workers to be willing to give up 10% of their salary for more flexibility. --For what it's worth . . . if you run a company and actually set people's salaries, you may get better workers for cheaper if you offer slightly less money for more flexibility. --62% of people say that flexibility is a HUGE factor when they're choosing a job. 79% of working mothers and 77% of working fathers say they'd stay at a company longer if it offered more flexibility. (PR Newswire)


Workers in China Fake Being Sick More Than Workers in Any Other Country:

Americans have resigned themselves to the idea that China will outwork us and bury our economy. But here's reason to be hopeful. --A survey by Kronos Global found that workers in China are the most likely to LIE about being sick in order to get a day off from work. --71% of Chinese workers admit that they've done that. That's about 20% more than in the U.S. --America finished a distant fourth in the survey, in a dead heat with Canada. --The country with the second-most fake sick days was India, where 62% of workers admit to lying to their boss for a day off. Australia was third, at 58%. --The country that was least likely to lie to get a sick day was France, at 16%. It could be that French people are more honest, or it could be the 30 DAYS of vacation that every worker gets. --India and China are in the bottom three when it comes to paid vacation time, so obviously there's a connection between less paid vacation and misuse of sick days. --Mexico was next lowest, with only 38% of their workers faking a sick day. --Worldwide, the most common thing people did with their ill-gotten sick time was stay in bed and watch TV. (Reuters)


FEMA Evaluates Hurricane Damage by . . . Checking the Local Waffle House?

I don't know what's worse: That FEMA does this . . . or that they ADMIT they do. --When FEMA arrives on the scene after a hurricane makes landfall, they need to get a quick read on how bad the damage is. And one of the ways they do that is . . . by visiting the local Waffle House. --There are 1,600 Waffle Houses from the mid-Atlantic down to Florida and the Gulf Coast, and they have a reputation for staying open no matter what: They're small, they're everywhere, and they can survive almost anything. (--Kinda like cockroaches.) --So FEMA has an unofficial "Waffle House Index", complete with a color-coding system: If they arrive and a Waffle House is CLOSED . . . that's a Code Red. That means the storm damage is extensive and conditions are unsafe. --According to FEMA administrator Craig Fugate, quote, "That's really bad. That's when you go to work." --Code Yellow means they're open, serving a limited menu, and have power from a generator. If they're up and running with full power, that's a Code Green --Hurricane Irene hit Weldon, North Carolina hard on Saturday, but by 6:30 Sunday morning, the Waffle House was operating at Code Yellow. In Virginia, 21 of the 22 Waffle Houses hit by Irene were back to Code Green within three days. (Wall Street Journal)

Domino's is Planning to Build a New Restaurant . . . On the Moon:

It's 2011, and we were promised that we'd be able to take vacations to outer space by now. Obviously that hasn't happened. But when it finally DOES happen, at least now you'll have someplace to eat. --Domino's has announced that they are planning to be the first people to build a restaurant on the Moon. --The Japanese branch of Domino's has even hired a company to start planning out their Moon restaurant. It will be dome-shaped and they estimate it will cost about $22 BILLION to build . . . with most of the cost in transporting materials up there. --A spokesman for Domino's says, quote, "we have not yet determined when the restaurant might open." But they want to have the plans ready, so that they're the first restaurant on the Moon once people start traveling there. (The Telegraph) (--Here are some images of what the Domino's on the Moon might look like.)


25% of Women Admit They Commit "Size Fraud" . . . and Buy Clothes That are Too Small for Them:

According to a new survey, one out of four women buy clothes with no intention of wearing them in the near future. Because those clothes don't even come CLOSE to fitting.

--25% of women admit they commit "size fraud" . . . meaning they regularly buy clothes that are TOO SMALL for them.

--Two-thirds of those women say they do it because they lie to people about their size. 20% do it for a self-esteem boost.

--The most common things women buy even though they don't fit are . . . pants.

--Jeans are second, and shoes are third.

--The survey also found that only 11% of women are happy with their body.

(Female First)


Men Who are Looking For a Relationship Spend 60% More Money on a Date:

Here's a way you can tell what's going on in your date's mind. A new study found that when a guy is looking for a relationship, he's MUCH more willing to spend money than when he's just looking to do a quick pump-and-dump. --The study found that men will spend 60% more on a date when they're looking for a relationship. That turned out to be an average of a $73 difference. (PR Web)


33% of Men Now Look at Porno on Their Phones:

New smartphones with 3G and 4G networks are finally powerful enough to stream high-quality video. So naturally, the first instinct for men is . . . PORNO. --According to a poll by LG, 33% of men look at porno on their phones. They didn't release the numbers for women. --The poll also found that 20% of men and women use their phones to do online dating, and 20% have sexted naked photos or videos. (Daily Star)


One Out of Ten People Have Joined the Mile-High Club?

This number seems WAY too high. If it's true, it means A LOT of people you know have joined the MILE-HIGH CLUB. And that you've probably been on a plane where there were people humping and you had no idea. --According to a survey by a travel site called Jetcost, one out of ten people say they've had relations on an airplane. And one out of six of those people say it was with a stranger they met on board. --The main reason people give for joining the mile-high club is . . . BOREDOM --10% of people who've had airplane sex say it wasn't on a long international or cross-country flight . . . it was on a quick flight, less than a few hours long. (AOL Travel)


Hotels are Getting Rid of Those Little Bottles of Shampoo:

NOW what are we going to steal? According to an article in "USA Today", more and more hotels are getting rid of the mini bottles of shampoo . . . and replacing them with refillable pump canisters. --The hotels say it reduces waste. And while some of them are claiming it doesn't reduce cost . . . we all know they wouldn't do it if it wasn't profitable. --So far, this is rolling out in some higher-end chains, like Viceroy Hotels and some of the Starwood luxury hotels. But it could affect the places real people stay too . . . and it could happen sooner rather than later. (USA Today)


Scientists at Harvard and MIT Have Calculated the Five Secrets to Avoiding Flight Delays and Missed Connections:

Thank you, nerds. A team of scientists at Harvard and MIT used some sophisticated statistical modeling . . . that's FAR beyond our pay grade . . . to figure out the tricks to avoiding flight delays and missed connections. --And for some reason, they passed the info on to us commoners. So here are those five tricks, based on their analysis.

#1.) Avoid regional airlines. The smaller airlines like American Eagle, Skywest, and Mesa have the greatest percentage of cancellations and missed connections.

#2.) Fly on low-cost airlines. JetBlue, Southwest, AirTran, and Frontier have fewer connections, fly to more reliable airports, and generally do a better job taking off and leaving on time.

#3.) Fly in the morning. A flight after noon is 86.8% more likely to be delayed than one in the morning. And it's MUCH easier to rebook a flight that gets canceled in the morning because there are so many more options.

#4.) Fly on Monday or Saturday. Those two days have the fewest delays.

#5.) The more flights, the better. You're better off taking an airline that has a lot of flights to your destination. An airline with at least 10 daily flights to a destination is 31.4% less likely to have cancellations or delays to that destination. (Harvard Business School)


People Still Send Postcards? Here are a Bunch of Stats on the Postcards We Send:

I haven't gotten a postcard since . . . well, probably since I could read it while eating a McDonald's Arch Deluxe and watching the original "Beverly Hills 90210". But apparently some people still send them.--There's a company called Touchnote that lets you send personalized, printed postcards using your cell phone and Facebook photos. And they analyzed 2,000 postcards to come up with these trends . . .

--29% of Americans send postcards containing pictures of their children.

--15% send a postcard that has a "funny" or irreverent picture.

--19% send a postcard with a romantic image.

--Now, with modern technology letting people customize their own postcard photos, only 15% sent an old-school scenic image.

--Less than 1% sign their postcards with the old "XOXO" hugs and kisses thing.

--People send postcards featuring pictures of pets . . . but almost exclusively dogs. 99% of the postcards containing a picture of an animal featured a dog.

--Only 42% of the postcards were sent while people were on vacation.

--0.2% put their sonogram photo on a postcard.

(Journalism.co.uk)
A New Study Finds That, Believe it or Not, The Most Biased Fans in Baseball Aren't Yankees or Red Sox Fans:

A website called Beyond the Box Score wanted to figure out which Major League Baseball team's fans are the most DELUSIONAL. Meaning, which fans irrationally believe their players are the best even though the evidence clearly shows otherwise. --And believe it or not, the most biased fans in baseball AREN'T Yankees or Red Sox fans. Nope . . . based on this formula, ATLANTA BRAVES fans are the most irrational. --The formula calculated the statistical rank of a player in baseball, then figured out how many all-star fan votes he deserved to get. Then they compared that result to the number of all-star fan votes he ACTUALLY got. --And Braves players had the biggest disparity. They got 2.21 times more support than the average team's players. The Seattle Mariners fans came in as the second-most biased, then the San Francisco Giants, Philadelphia Phillies, and Texas Rangers. --Pittsburgh Pirates fans actually UNDERVALUED their players: Their players got 0.41 times as much support as they should have. Florida Marlins fans are second-least biased, the San Diego Padres are third, Houston Astros are fourth, and the L.A.-Anaheim Angels were fifth. --Minnesota Twins fans were completely unbiased . . . they were the only team whose players got the right amount of support based on their skill. --As for the famously self-centered franchises, Yankees fans gave players 1.36 times more support than average . . . Red Sox fans actually undervalued their players, who only got 0.89 times the support of the average player. (Beyond the Box Score) (--You can see the full chart ranking the teams by their fans' bias here.)


Here are Ten Companies That Actually Use Real People to Handle Customer Service Calls:

Everyone hates calling customer service and getting that automated switchboard that goes nowhere . . . while they tell you how important your call is. --71% of Americans say they become "extremely irritated" when they call a company and can't speak to a real person. And two out of three give up and end the call without getting their issue resolved. --Obviously automated switchboards save companies money, but you'll be on hold an average of one minute and 51 seconds. That's more than TWICE as long compared to a company that doesn't use them.

--Yes, there are still companies that use HUMAN BEINGS instead of computers to answer the phone. Here are ten of them . . .

--Amazon.com

--Grainger (--They sell industrial equipment.)

--L.L. Bean

--SportsmansGuide.com

--Nordstrom

--Neiman Marcus

--Cabelas.com (--They sell camping gear.)

--Urban Outfitters

--BlueNile.com (--They sell engagement rings and fine jewelry.)

--MarketAmerica.com (Yahoo Finance)
RANDOM NEWS EXTRAS

Random News Extras . . . Random Links to Additional Stories:


This past March, a couple in Michigan drove their 7-year-old to a bus stop so he could confront a bully. But when the 73-year-old crossing guard tried to break up the fight, they beat him up. (Full Story)


Get your baby to love math with . . . stuffed Statistical Distribution toys! (Full Story)


A 21-year-old math major at UCLA bought an $800 one-way plane ticket from L.A. to Cairo two weeks ago, snuck across the border into Libya, and tried to join the Libyan rebels. (Full Story)


Not surprisingly, the uniforms of doctors and nurses are covered in bacteria. According to a new study, germs are found on 63% of them, including antibiotic resistant bacteria on 14% of nurses' uniforms, and 6% of doctors'. (Full Story)


A 21-year-old mother was arrested in Arizona on Saturday for trying to calm her 10-month-old baby down after hitting her . . . by blowing marijuana smoke in its mouth. (Full Story)


Four out of five people don't use a meat thermometer to tell when meat's fully cooked. But that's okay, because four in five don't know what temperature meat should be cooked to anyway. 73% of us rely on sight, and 57% of us go by cooking time. (Full Story)


NAZZY’S VIDEOS OF THE DAY

#1.) "Here Kitty-Kitty" Part One: Check Out Paz de la Huerta in a Hot Lingerie Ad Campaign:

If you're fan of HBO's "Boardwalk Empire", then you're a fan of Paz de la Huerta . . . Steve Buscemi's mistress. And you'll be a fan of the hot new ad campaign she's doing for Agent Provocateur lingerie, too. --It's a series of videos where she's hounded by the paparazzi . . . and demonstrates how to strategically flash your underwear on purpose. The first one has her getting out of a car, and "accidentally" flashing . . . well, everything. But no actual nudity.--The second one's even more ridiculous: She demonstrates how to distract photographers with your lingerie-clad crotch when you do something embarrassing, like drop your purse. In the third one she flashes her butt. --And she's not wearing much to begin with in the ads, even BEFORE she flashes the cameras. So . . . Happy Friday. (--Search for "Agent Provocateur - Always Remember Your Agent Provocateurs - Part 1. She goes for the purse at :35, and her underwear doesn't leave much to the imagination. She flashes her butt at 1:08. Check out some stills here.)


#2.) "Here Kitty-Kitty" Part Two: A Cat Owning a Balloon Version of Itself:

Funnyordie.com has a video called Cat vs. Balloon, where a couple introduces their brown and white cat to a balloon version of itself. In other words, the balloon is cat-sized, brown and white, has a tail and legs, and has an automated purr. --The woman filming got it as a birthday present, and when her guy uses a remote control to introduce the balloon cat to the real cat, the real cat OWNS the balloon.
(--The cat pops the balloon at :18. WARNING! There's profanity.)


#3.) Players and Coaches Attacked a Referee at a Youth Football Game:

Last Saturday, the Sarasota Gators faced off against the North Port Husky's in a youth football game at Riverview High, in Sarasota, Florida. With about a minute and a half left in the first half, the ref called a personal foul against the Husky's. --But for some reason, the Gators sideline FLIPPED OUT. Maybe because they were losing 30-to-6. And the ref called ANOTHER personal foul when they came onto the field and confronted him. --A Husky fan was filming the whole thing, and she didn't capture all of what happened next. Apparently, someone threw a bottle of water on the ref, and a fight started. But it's unclear who threw the first punch. --But she DID film the aftermath . . . where a player ran the ref over like a FREIGHT TRAIN, and started a brawl. An assistant coach for the Husky's tried to break it up, and got injured along with the ref. --Now the Gators have been banned from playing on their home field, and suspended. And the cops are making arrests. (--Search for "Arrests likely in football fight." He gets run over at :36.)



#4.) Enjoy Some Crappy Foreign Versions of "Star Wars":

Since GEORGE LUCAS can't stop himself from ruining his own movies, you might as well enjoy a version of "Star Wars" that was SUPPOSED to be crappy. A website picked some of the worst foreign interpretations, and they're pretty terrible. (--Search for "The Best Worst Foreign Versions of Star Wars".)


Four Things You Can't Do Once You Have a Baby:

If you're single and staying out late this weekend, enjoy it while you still can. Because closing down the bar is one of the things on TheNest.com's list of "Things You Can't Do Once You Have a Baby." Here are four more.

#1.) Wear White. No one really follows the whole "no white after Labor Day" rule anymore. But new parents can NEVER wear white. --You have to wear mostly dark clothes with patterns . . . or what's referred to as "spit-up camouflage." And even once you're kids are toddlers, you still have to worry about things like food, drinks, and paint.

#2.) Roll Out of Bed and Go. According to The Nest, having even one kid will add about 30 minutes to your morning routine. And that's every day until they're old enough to get ready by themselves. So at least a solid decade if you have ONE kid.

#3.) Read Anything with Chapters. This one's kind of dumb, because obviously plenty of parents still read books. But it's a lot harder to get through 20 or 30 pages when you've got kids running around. --So a lot of parents end up reading more magazines instead.

#4.) Watch Late-Night Comedy Late at Night. You might, right after the baby comes . . . because you'll be up all night anyway. But after that, 11 p.m. is WAY past your bedtime. --It you want to watch one of the late-night shows, you'll have to Tivo it, and try to get to it the next day. But chances are, you'll have so much more to do, you won't have time for that either. (TheNest.com)


Five Ways to Get What You Want in the Bedroom:

Critiquing how someone 'performs' in the bedroom is a touchy subject . . . it's way too easy to hurt feeling and bruise egos. So today we've got five painless ways to get EXACTLY what you want when you're between the sheets.

#1.) Turn a Criticism into a Compliment. Instead of telling someone what they're doing WRONG, focus on improving what they're doing RIGHT. Tell them you love what they're doing, and how doing it a certain way would make it even better.

#2.) Leave Clues. Actually, Match.com says, quote, "use reference material." Really. But what they mean is, talk about an article you read in "Cosmo" that talked about doing something you want to try.

#3.) Show . . . Don't Tell. If you're shy about asking for what you want, try showing it instead. Like, move someone's hands where you want them, or make more noise when they do something good.

#4.) Make a Game out of It. Play a game of "Hot or Cold" where they have to GUESS what you want done to you. It's a fun challenge, and you'll both end up satisfied.

#5.) Positive Reinforcement. When they eventually do hit the right spots, make sure they KNOW, so they'll keep doing it in the future. (Match.com)

Thursday, September 1, 2011

HOLLYWOOD DIRT OVERFLOW (09-01-11)

Is There "Evidence" That Jennifer Aniston is Pregnant?

The gossip site X-17 Online has offered some supposed "evidence" that JENNIFER ANISTON is pregnant. --First, they spotted Jennifer and her boyfriend JUSTIN THEROUX visiting a medical building in Beverly Hills yesterday. And Jen was, quote, "holding her belly as she left." --Secondly, Jen was sucking on a lollipop. The website says that when a woman in her first trimester of pregnancy gets blood drawn, they usually give her candy so her blood sugar level is high enough that she doesn't pass out. --Last but not least, a so-called "source" says Jen has been abstaining from alcohol for the past few weeks. --X-17 also points out that Jennifer and Justin also wear matching rings. But that doesn't prove she's pregnant . . . just that she and Justin seem to be in a committed relationship. (--You can see pictures and video of Jennifer and Justin's trip to the doctor here.)


Vivid Wants $30 Million for the Kim Kardashian Sex Tape:

As expected, Vivid Entertainment isn't willing to give up the KIM KARDASHIAN sex tape for anything less than a fortune. --The owner of the company says, quote, "Based on its long term value, it looks like $30 MILLION would be a starting point for a discussion on all of the rights." --He adds, quote, "I have no idea who is behind this offer . . . but if it's Kim, I have a tremendous amount of respect for her. She has my number and can call me any time." --Meanwhile, "Life & Style" says that while Kim and KRIS HUMPHRIES were on their mini-honeymoon in Europe, Kim was spotted at a Pharmacy in Italy buying PREGNANCY TESTS. --A source close to Kim says, quote, "She wants a baby nine months to the day of getting married."


Did Kim Kardashian Buy Herself a $450,000 Ferrari as a Wedding Gift?

KIM KARDASHIAN received a $450,000 Ferrari as a wedding gift from . . . HERSELF. It's a white 2011 Ferrari 458 with a carbon fiber interior, $15,000 Agetro wheels, a see-through glass engine compartment in the rear and a ton of other features.


Marc Anthony Will Be on "Good Morning America" and "Nightline" Today:

MARC ANTHONY spoke with ABC News about his split from JENNIFER LOPEZ. The interview will air in two parts: This morning on "Good Morning America" and tonight on "Nightline". --Marc says nobody was having an affair . . . the relationship just stopped working. He tells ABC, quote, "It was a realization on both our parts. So, you know, it wasn't shocking. These things happen. It was a decision that we made jointly." --He adds, quote, "This is not a funeral. This is not a burial. This is just two people who came together and just realized . . . and so I'm saying that it wasn't sustainable the way it was, and that's that." --In a preview video released yesterday, Marc says, quote, "I'll always love Jennifer." --He adds, quote, "Jennifer's a wonderful, wonderful woman, a wonderful mother, a wonderful friend." --And he says, quote, "We realized very early on that, you know, even though we're not together, this story's not over. There's stuff to do together, there's life to see together through [twins] Max and Emme . . . so it's all good, man." (--You can watch a preview clip here.) (--By the way . . . Jennifer and Marc both have new product lines for the Kohl's department store chain. They each recently shot ads for their respective lines. You can watch those here.)


Robert Downey Jr. is Going to Have Another Kid:

ROBERT DOWNEY JR. is going to be a dad again. His wife Susan is expecting a child early next year. There's no word on the gender. --This will be their first child together, but Downey also has a 17-year-old son from his first marriage. --While promoting his movie "Due Date" last year, Downey actually predicted this. He said, quote, "I think I will be wrist-deep in doo-doo within 18 months. I'm calling it right here."


Alyssa Milano Had Her Baby:

ALYSSA MILANO gave birth to a baby boy on Tuesday. This is the first child for both Alyssa and her husband, David Bugliari, who's a Hollywood agent. They named him Milo Thomas Bugliari. --This might not be the last kid for Alyssa. She recently told E! News, quote, "I had such a great time being pregnant that you're probably going to see me more pregnant than not in the next few years, because I'm really digging it."
Will Jessica Simpson Get a Breast Reduction Before Her Wedding?

"In Touch Weekly" claims that JESSICA SIMPSON might get a BREAST REDUCTION before her wedding to ERIC JOHNSON so she won't look so big. --A so-called "source" says, quote, "She thinks that if she downsizes her breasts, she will look smaller. [She doesn't want to be a] plus-size bride. Jessica wants to waltz down the aisle, not waddle." --The source says Jessica is working hard to drop the pounds, but if she doesn't lose enough weight, she may go under the knife. --Jessica's rep is totally denying this.


Oscar De La Hoya Finally Admits Those Cross-Dressing Photos of Him Were Real:

Remember back in 2007, when photos of boxer OSCAR DE LA HOYA in LINGERIE hit the World Wide Web of Celebrity Smut? --De La Hoya insisted they were Photoshopped, then launched a smear campaign against the Russian stripper who took them . . . and subsequently sold them to a tabloid website. --Well, Oscar has finally admitted they were LEGIT. He says, quote, "Let me tell you, yes, it was me. I'm tired of lying, lying to people, lying to myself." --Oscar is admitting a lot of things these days . . . like that he's battling addictions to cocaine and alcohol, and that he's trying to patch things up with his wife because he cheated on her. --He says, quote, "Rock bottom was recently, within a couple of years. Just, thinking, 'Is my life even worth it?'" --As for the cheating, he says he did it more than once, but not more than another famously unfaithful athlete . . . quote, "We are obviously not talking Tiger Woods here, but I was unfaithful." (--You can see Oscar's drag pics here and here.)


Mel Gibson Settled Up with Oksana Grigorieva for $750,000:

We heard that MEL GIBSON and OKSANA GRIGORIEVA had settled their custody and support issues. Well, yesterday they were in court to sign off on the deal, so now we have the details. --Mel agreed to pay Oksana $750,000 over the next five years, and to allow Oksana to continue living in a house he owns in Los Angeles. --When their daughter Lucia turns 18, Mel will sell the house and put the money in a trust for her. Lucia will be 2 in October. --Custody of Lucia will be split 50-50. --Mel and Oksana can't talk about each other publicly, write books about each other or anything like that. Also, Oksana can't release any more audiotapes she might have of Mel. If she does, she forfeits the money. --Oksana's attorney said she settled because it was in Lucia's best interests. But this has to be considered a pretty huge loss for her. --Last year, during all the chaos revolving around the Mel Gibson MELTDOWN tapes and the allegations of abuse, Mel reportedly put a $15 MILLION offer on the table, and Oksana rejected it. --She claimed she did so because she didn't want Mel to have custody of Lucia . . . but sources claimed she was holding out for MORE MONEY. -Whatever the case, Oksana kind of took a bath. Because she's only getting a fraction of that money, and Mel has equal custody . . . which he was NOT asking for in the $15 million deal. (--Here's video from yesterday's court hearing . . . in which Oksana's attorney slips in a plug for Oksana's music career.)


Demi Lovato is a Smoker:

DEMI LOVATO should be a good role model for young girls. She faced her body image issues head-on and is trying to spread a very positive message in that regard. There's only one problem: She's a SMOKER. --Demi was photographed recently with a pack of Marlboro Menthols clearly sticking out of her purse. (--Here's the pic.) (Hollywood Life)


Before His Incredibly Minor Car Accident, Justin Bieber was Racing with Everlast from House of Pain:

Remember that incredibly minor car accident JUSTIN BIEBER got into on Tuesday . . . in which his Ferrari was BARELY TAPPED from behind by a Honda Civic? --Well, not long before that happened, Justin was doing a little STREET RACING with EVERLAST from the group HOUSE OF PAIN. (--They're the "Jump Around" guys. You know . . . "Pack it up, Pack it in, Let me begin . . .") --It doesn't sound like it was an organized contest or anything . . . just two guys in sweet rides who decided to test each other. --Everlast Tweeted, quote, "I just raced @justinbieber down Ventura in his Ferrari. I won but a Fedex truck got in his way. Seemed like a down to earth kid." --Everlast was driving an Audi R8.



Donald Trump Is Inviting Australian Business Leaders to Spend Time with Him . . . As Long as They Pay Him $10,000 for the Privilege:

DONALD TRUMP is taking a trip to Australia . . . and he's inviting that country's rich, successful business leaders to a meet-and-greet with him. Of course, they have to pay $10,000 for the privilege. --He's calling this event the "Platinum Privilege". He sent out a letter to prospective invitees saying, quote, "Like me, you're at the top of the food chain. And no-one put you there, you put yourself there. I respect that. --"In fact, it's why I'd like to extend an invitation to you that very few will receive." --Attendees will get total access to Trump . . . and a framed photo of themselves with him. The proceeds are going to . . . well . . . Donald Trump. --There's room for about 30 or 40 people . . . meaning he could pocket up to $400,000 from this venture. (--You'll find a copy of the invite here.)


NEW MOVIES THIS WEEKEND

Helen Mirren Plays a Spy and Katharine McPhee is Attacked by Sharks!

#1.) "The Debt" (R) (Opened Wednesday)

Helen Mirren, Tom Wilkinson, and Ciaran Hinds are former Mossad agents whose mission to hunt down a Nazi war criminal in the '60s may not have been the huge success everyone thought it was. --In the flashback scenes they're played by Jessica Chastain from "The Help", a New Zealand actor named Marton Csokas, and "Avatar's" Sam Worthington. You may remember Csokas as one of the elf lords, Celeborn, in "The Lord of the Rings". (Trailer)


#2.) "Shark Night 3D" (PG-13)

A group of college students are trapped on an island surrounded by a lake that's been stocked with hungry sharks. 3D carnage ensues. The doomed cast includes Katharine McPhee, who parlayed her "American Idol" fame into an acting career. --McPhee's done some minor TV appearances, but this is her first big role since she was in theaters in "The House Bunny". She was runner-up to forgotten "Idol" winner Taylor Hicks on the fifth season of the show back in 2006. --It's directed by the guy who did the second and fourth "Final Destination" movies, director David Ellis. More importantly, he also did "Snakes on a Plane" . . . which is why I need so bad to believe they'll include the line, "Enough is enough! I've had it with these mother[effin] sharks on this mother[effin] lake." (Trailer)


#3.) "Apollo 18" (PG-13)

The last official lunar mission was Apollo 17, but this sci-fi horror film is about a secret 18th mission, where two American astronauts were sent back to the moon to find out what happened to some missing cosmonauts. (Trailer #1) (Trailer #2)


Check Out Some Pictures of the "American Pie" Gang Back Together:

The original "American Pie" gang is back together and filming "American Reunion". It's due in theaters in April. --The last time a significant portion of the cast was together was for "American Wedding" in 2003. But Stifler . . . a.k.a. SEANN WILLIAM SCOTT . . . says, quote, "In many respects we've grown up a lot. But on the other hand we haven't grown up at all. --"On-set, Jason Biggs was farting up a storm, Chris Klein was belching, and Eddie Kaye Thomas and Biggs were hitting each other in [the groin]." (--You can watch a video of the cast here. It's actually just a collection of stills of the characters hamming it up in a photo booth at their class reunion.)


Check Out Some More Pictures of the New Superman:

Some new pictures of HENRY CAVILL as Superman in "Man of Steel" hit the web yesterday . . . and we've learned a few more things about the costume. First of all, the whole thing has a texture, unlike any previous Superman suits. --Also, there are raised, silvery lines around the mid-section, and the blue of the costume is a lot darker than we've ever seen. Cavill also isn't wearing a cape in these pics. --But we've seen pics where he IS wearing a cape. So maybe he takes it on and off in the movie. (--Here are the pics.) (Hollywood Reporter)
Cher Would Like the Haters to Stop "Attacking" Her Son, Chaz Bono:

Some people were thrilled to see CHAZ BONO make the cast of "Dancing with the Stars", because it'll revolutionize how people see transgender people. Others think Chaz's inclusion will somehow destroy "traditional" American families. --So, it's safe to say that a lot of people seem to be putting way too much stock in "Dancing with the Stars" casting . . . and how it relates to the future of humanity. --Regardless, Chaz's mother CHER would like the haters to KINDLY SHUT THEIR TRAPS. Yesterday, she Tweeted, quote, "Lovelies! Chaz is being viciously attacked on blogs and message boards about being on ['Dancing']! --"This is still America right? It took guts to do it." (--Well, Chaz definitely has the gut to handle this. In fact, I wouldn't be surprised if his delicious candy coating has a slight gravitational pull, which brings everyone in for bear hugs!) --Cher then attempted to mobilize her 300,000-strong Twitter army into action. She said, quote, "Will there always be haters! . . . Can you guys check out sites and give him your support? --"By the way . . . mothers don't stop getting angry with stupid bigots who [eff] with their children! He's such a good person inside, a lotta heart. [The] VAST MAJORITY of people will LOVE Chaz on ['Dancing']." --And then . . . in a noticeably more uncomfortable moment . . . Cher re-Tweeted a message from a fan that said, quote, "I think we can agree that Chaz has the biggest balls of anyone on ['Dancing']."


The "Dancing with the Stars" Couples Have Been Revealed; Chaz Bono Will Be Paired with Lacey Schwimmer:

ABC revealed the "Dancing with the Stars" couples on "Good Morning America" yesterday. Here's the complete rundown:

--Chaz Bono and Lacey Schwimmer

--Former "Queer Eye" star Carson Kressley and Anna Trebunskaya

--David Arquette and Kym Johnson, who won last season with Hines Ward

--Ricki Lake and Derek Hough

--Wilson Phillips legend Chynna Phillips and Tony Dovolani

--Rob Kardashian and Cheryl Burke

--Kristin Cavallari and Mark Ballas

--Soap star and Iraq war veteran J.R. Martinez and Karina Smirnoff

--Soccer minx Hope Solo and Maksim Chmerkovskiy

--George Clooney's ex-girlfriend Elisabetta Canalis and Maksim's younger brother Val Chmerkovskiy

--L.A. Laker Ron Artest and Peta Murgatroyd

--"Tot Mom" hater Nancy Grace and Tristan MacManus

(--There are three new pros: Maksim's brother Val, who's briefly popped up on the show a few times . . . Tristan MacManus and Peta Murgatroyd.) (--Tristan and Peta were both members of the "Dancing with the Stars Troupe," the dance performance group introduced last season.) (--The 13th season premiere airs Monday, September 19th. All 12 "stars" will perform during the premiere, and one couple will be eliminated on the following night's results show.)


The Next "Amazing Race" Cast Has Been Announced . . . and It Includes Former "Survivors" Ethan Zohn and Jenna Morasca:

The cast of the next "Amazing Race" has been announced, and it includes cancer-survivor and "Survivor"-winner ETHAN ZOHN. His partner is his longtime girlfriend JENNA MORASCA, who's also a "Survivor"-winner. --Ethan won the third season of "Survivor", and Jenna won the sixth season. They began dating after her "Survivor" win, and both appeared on the "All Stars" season. In 2009, Ethan was diagnosed with cancer . . . but last year, it went into remission. --The rest of the cast includes: A former NFL player . . . Olympic snowboarders . . . gay flight attendants . . . and Zac Sunderland, who at 16 became the youngest person to ever sail around the world alone. (--For all the info, hit up this link.)
TV REMINDERS

Thursday TV Reminders: (--Check your local listings.)

--"Rising: Rebuilding Ground Zero" [1st Season Finale] . . . 8:00 to 11:00 P.M. on Discovery Channel.

--"Nick News: What Happened? The Story of September 11, 2001" . . . 9:00 to 9:30 P.M. on Nickelodeon. (--Linda Ellerbee hosts this special to answer kids' questions about what really happened the day of the terrorist attacks 10 years ago.)

--"Project Runway" . . . 9:00 to 10:00 P.M. on Lifetime. (--Fashion designer Kenneth Cole is your guest judge for the evening.)

--"Sweet Home Alabama" [1st Season Finale] . . . 9:00 to 10:00 P.M. on CMT.

--"Texas Women" [1st Season Finale] . . . 10:00 to 11:00 P.M. on CMT.

--"Ugly Americans" [2nd Season Finale] . . . 10:30 to 11:00 P.M. on Comedy Central.

--"The Green Room with Paul Provenza" [2nd Season Finale] . . . 11:00 to 11:30 P.M. on Showtime. (--Eddie Izzard, Jimmy Carr, Chris Hardwick, Tim Minchin and Judah Friedlander guest.)

--"Childrens Hospital" [3rd Season Finale] . . . Midnight to 12:15 A.M. on Adult Swim.


The Worst Songs of the '90s . . . According to "Rolling Stone" Readers:

"Rolling Stone" recently polled their readers to come up with a list of The Worst Songs of the '90s. They released the results yesterday. Here's the list:

1.) "Barbie Girl", Aqua (1997)

2.) "Macarena", Los Del Rio (1995)

3.) "Achy Breaky Heart", Billy Ray Cyrus (1992)

4.) "Ice Ice Baby", Vanilla Ice (1990)

5.) "Tubthumping", Chumbawamba (1996)

6.) "MMMBop", Hanson (1997)

7.) "My Heart Will Go On", Celine Dion (1997)

8.) "Who Let the Dogs Out?", Baha Men (2000) . . . (--Apparently, "Rolling Stone" was okay with including this one, even though it didn't actually come out "in the '90s.")

9.) "I'm Too Sexy", Right Said Fred (1991)

10.) "What's Up", 4 Non Blondes (1993)

(--You can find audio and mini write-ups for each one at RollingStone.com.)

Check Out Kelly Clarkson's New Single "Mr. Know It All":

KELLY CLARKSON has put out a song called "Mr. Know It All". It's the first single off her next album, "Stronger", which hits stores on October 25th. --The chorus includes the lines: Quote, "Oh, you think that you know me, know me / That's why I'm leaving you lonely, lonely / 'Cause baby you don't know a thing about me / You don't know a thing about me." (--You can listen to the whole track, here.)


Game Barely Edged Out Jay-Z and Kanye West for the Top Spot on the "Billboard" Chart:

GAME has the new #1 album in the country. "R.E.D" moved 98,000 copies in its first week of release, outselling JAY-Z and KANYE WEST'S "Watch the Throne" by 4,000 copies. --The next highest debut came from BARBRA STREISAND, whose new disc "What Matters Most" sold 68,000 copies in 4th place. It's Barbra's 31st Top 10 album, which pulls her ahead of THE BEATLES for the third most Top 10s in history. --Only the ROLLING STONES and FRANK SINATRA have more. (--The Stones have 36 and Sinatra has 33.)

1.) (NEW) "R.E.D", Game (98,000 copies)

2.) "Watch the Throne", Jay-Z and Kanye West (94,000 copies)

3.) "21", Adele (82,000 copies)


Tupac Shakur's Family Says No One Had Permission to Smoke His Ashes:

Earlier this week, the members of TUPAC SHAKUR'S old hip-hop group THE OUTLAWZ claimed they smoked Tupac's ashes after he was murdered in 1996. --The Outlawz say it happened at a family memorial event, and that Pac's mom Afeni was there . . . but she's denying that she had anything to do with it, and is questioning that it even happened in the first place. --A family spokesperson said Afeni would, quote, "never participate in smoking her son." And on top of that, no one had permission to take and smoke his ashes. --The family doubts that this happened . . . because The Outlawz would've had to "sneak the remains past the family at the memorial." But even if it did happen, they're not planning on pursuing any legal action against The Outlawz.


T.I. Is Out of Prison . . . and Shooting a Reality Show:

T.I. was released from prison yesterday after serving 10 months for violating his probation. That happened when he was arrested for drug possession last September. T.I. will serve last month of his 11-month sentence at a halfway house. --And he already has his hands full. According to TMZ, T.I. began shooting a VH1 reality show "minutes after being released from prison." --All we know about the show is that it debuts in December, and that it "will follow T.I. as he re-adjusts to life as a free man after being incarcerated for nearly a year."


Keith Urban Pitched One of His Songs to Scotty McCreery:

This year's "American Idol" champ SCOTTY MCCREERY was planning to put all original material on his debut country album . . . and then KEITH URBAN dusted off one of his old songs and offered it up. That changed the plan. --Scotty explains, quote, "There's technically going to be one cover. Keith Urban pitched a song my way, and it's one he did way back when he was part of the band THE RANCH. --"He's on tour right now so we don't know, but he said he might play guitar on the track." --As far as the sound of Scotty's debut album . . . well, I'll let him explain. He says, quote, "It's not going to be poppy. That's one thing we stayed away from. I grew up with the old-school stuff, so I didn't want to completely stray from that. --"We've got the rocker songs, the up-tempo stuff. But when we slow it down, the songs get more intimate, and you can definitely hear some of the more classic elements." (--Scotty's album "Clear As Day" is due out October 4th.) --One more thing about Scotty McCreery . . . PeopleTV.com asked if any of the big-time artists he's met have left him star-struck. He mentioned CARRIE UNDERWOOD and TIM MCGRAW. (--You can listen to that interview, here.)
THURSDAY'S SHOWBIZ EXTRAS

Showbiz Extras . . . Random Links to Additional Stories:

While SARAH JESSICA PARKER was doing the promotional rounds in Moscow, some dude tried to kiss her, but she denied him. Of course, moments before that, she did autograph his chest. (Video)



After 90-year-old NANCY REAGAN was caught on video almost falling, you had to know this was coming: The "National Enquirer" has printed one of its trademark "her tragic, final days"-type stories. (Full Story)



RIHANNA is filing a lawsuit because the $6.9 million house she bought in Beverly Hills is a piece of junk. (Full Story)



VENUS WILLIAMS dropped out of the U.S. Open after being diagnosed with Sjogren's Syndrome . . . an autoimmune disease that causes fatigue and joint pain. (Full Story)


RANDOM STUFF

How Would You Grade Yourself in Happiness, Romance, Finances, and Stress Management?

We've got the results of an interesting new survey from the marketing agency Euro RSCG Worldwide. They asked Americans to give themselves letter grades on how they're handling different aspects of life. --So we're going to run through a bunch of these. Give yourself a letter grade . . . and then we'll tell you how everyone else graded themselves.

--Happiness. 61% of both men and women give themselves an A or a B . . . 39% give themselves a C, a D, or an F.

--Romance. 49% of men give themselves an A or B, and 51% give themselves a C, D, or F. 54% of women give themselves an A or B, and 46% said C, D, or F.

--Career success. 55% of men went with A or B, and 45% went with C, D, or F. 48% of women said A or B, and 52% said C, D, or F.

--Weight management. 54% of men said they should get an A or a B, and 46% said C, D, or F. For women, 39% said A or B, while 61% said C, D, or F.

--Finances and financial security. 43% of men gave themselves an A or B, and 57% went with C, D, or F. 42% of women said A or B, and 58% said C, D, or F.

--Personality. 74% of men say their personality is an A or a B, and 26% say C, D, or F. 79% of women give themselves an A or a B . . . 21% said C, D, or F. (PR Newswire)

(--You can see more results, including grades for personal relationships, mental health, work-life balance, physical health, and charity work here.)
Firemen and Wall Street Executives are the Sexiest Jobs, According to Single Women in New York:

Match.com recently surveyed 1,000 of their New York members. Here are some of the more interesting things they found.

--47% of New Yorkers who've moved to the city in the past five years say that they are dating more since the move. (--Match.com seemed happy about that, but it means that more than half of them are dating the same, or LESS.)

--56% of the New York City transplants of say they think they have a larger pool of potential dates. (--Where were the other 44% living before?)

--If you want to bag a New York woman, you need a sexy job . . . and 30% of women said that FIREMAN was the sexiest profession. 26% said Wall Street executive.

--The worst place to go on a first date in the Big Apple is a chain restaurant. A karaoke bar was the next worst place to go, and touristy places like Times Square were also bad ideas.

--94% of people were willing to date someone from another borough . . . within reason. Nearly three quarters of New Yorkers were unwilling to travel more than 40 minutes to date someone.

--The best places to date someone were Brooklyn and Manhattan.

(PR Newswire)


Americans Trust the Computer Industry the Most . . . and the Federal Government the Least:

Remember back in the day when we thought Microsoft was the root of all evil? And we wanted the heroic Federal government to step in and stop their monopoly? What a difference a decade makes. --In a new Gallup poll, the computer industry was ranked as the MOST trusted sector of business and industry in the U.S. The federal government came in DEAD LAST. --The credit for the computer industry's rise almost exclusively goes to STEVE JOBS and Apple . . . they transformed the industry from a faceless giant into a hip part of the American lifestyle. --The top five industries in the poll are all related to computers or food . . . which makes sense when you look at what this country loves: Computers, the restaurant industry, the Internet, farming, and the grocery business. --The federal government came in last, just below the second-least trusted industry . . . oil and gas. Real estate, healthcare, and banking are also in the bottom five. --Back when Gallup first ran this poll in 2003, 43% of people gave a positive rating to the government. This year it was down to 17%. (Gallup) (--You can see the rankings of all the industries here. Somehow the TV and radio industry only got 39% positive feelings. Clearly that's the fault of those white-toothed D-bags on television. We on the radio are RAW and REAL.)


Condoleezza Rice Says Dick Cheney is Lying in His Memoir . . . She Never Went Into His Office and Cried:

DICK CHENEY'S new memoir, "In My Time", just came out. Which means it's time to hear the reactions of everyone he put on blast. --Up right now is . . . CONDOLEEZZA RICE. She was Secretary of State under PRESIDENT BUSH and Cheney --In the memoir, Cheney says he knew Iraq wasn't trying to get uranium to make nukes. But Rice told Bush that Iraq WAS trying to get uranium . . . and according to Cheney, she tricked Bush into saying it in his 2003 State of the Union address. --And after it all went down, he says Rice once, quote, "came into my office, sat down in the chair next to my desk, and tearfully admitted I had been right". --Rice says all of that is false. Quote, "I don't appreciate the attack on my integrity that that implies." --She also says she never cried to Cheney. Quote, "It certainly doesn't sound like me, now, does it? I would never. I don't remember coming to the vice president tearfully about anything in the entire eight years that I knew him." --COLIN POWELL has also blasted Cheney's memoir, saying it's filled with, quote, "cheap shots" and it mischaracterizes different events. (Reuters)

Maya Angelou Says the Quote on the New MLK Memorial Makes Him "Look Like an Arrogant Twit":

Back on August 22nd, the new MARTIN LUTHER KING JR. memorial opened in Washington, D.C. And on the statue of King, there's an inscription that reads, quote, "I was a drum major for justice, peace, and righteousness." --And MAYA ANGELOU absolutely HATES that they picked that quote. She says it's misleading, wrong, and it, quote, "makes Dr. Martin Luther King look like an arrogant twit." --The quote on the memorial is actually paraphrased from a speech King gave two months before he was assassinated.--He said, quote, "If you want to say that I was a drum major, say that I was a drum major for justice. Say that I was a drum major for peace. I was a drum major for righteousness. And all of the other shallow things will not matter."--Angelou says that by paraphrasing it down, it makes him look arrogant and simple. Quote, "He had no arrogance at all. He had a humility that comes from deep inside. Leaving out [the 'if' part] changes the meaning completely. He would never have said that of himself. He said 'you' might say it [about him]."--She's calling for the memorial to be changed and have the paraphrased quote replaced with the full quote. --Ed Jackson Junior is the executive architect of the memorial. He says they only had limited space for a quote so they went with that paraphrase to sum up King's life. He says no one else has had a problem with it. (Washington Post) (--Here's a photo of the quote on the monument.)


Random Fact: We Subconsciously Assign a Gender to Everything . . . Even Garbage Cans and Numbers:

Here's a totally random fact from some researchers at Northwestern University in Illinois. They found that people subconsciously assign gender to EVERYTHING. Anytime we see anything, we immediately think of it as either male or female.

--Here are some of the examples of different things and the gender we associate with them.

--Meat. Male.

--Dairy and salad. Female.

--Tables with sharp corners. Male.

--Round tables. Female.

--Dumpsters. Male.

--Garbage cans. Female.

--Odd numbers. Male.

--Even numbers. Female.

(Scientific American)


Women are Gaining Weight Because They Have Nice Hair?

Every statistic ever says we're all rapidly gaining weight. And here's a new theory why, from no less of an authority than the U.S. SURGEON GENERAL, Dr. Regina Benjamin. --She says that one reason American women are gaining weight is their NICE HAIR. --Quote, "Often times, you get women saying, 'I can't exercise today because I don't want to sweat my hair back or get my hair wet.' I hate to use the word 'excuse,' but that's one of them." --Benjamin says she understands the desire not to mess up expensive hair, because her mother was a hair stylist . . . but people still gotta get out and exercise. (Chicago Tribune)


Here's 1,690 Calories of Deliciousness: Denny's Officially Unveils the Mac 'n Cheese Patty Melt:

A little while back, Denny's unveiled the Fried Cheese Melt . . . a grilled cheese sandwich with fried mozzarella sticks stuffed between the cheese and bread. We called it GENIUS . . . but gut-busting at 895 calories. --Well . . . this sandwich makes that sandwich look like a garden salad with no croutons and low-calorie dressing on the side. --Denny's has officially unveiled their new Mac 'n Cheese Big Daddy Patty Melt. This is a patty melt featuring a burger, cheddar cheese . . . and MACARONI AND CHEESE on top of it. -And this checks in at 1,690 calories . . . almost DOUBLE the calories of the Fried Cheese Melt. --There's more. You can order it with, quote, "extra ooze" . . . meaning for 69 cents more they'll put even MORE CHEESE on your sandwich. --The price on the sandwich varies by restaurant, but can start as low as $4.99. (Eater) (--Here's a picture of this blessing from heaven.)


JCPenney Has Stopped Selling a Girls Sweatshirt That Reads "I'm Too Pretty to Do Homework":

Who knew JCPenney could get this EDGY? I didn't know you could stir up controversy on such a low budget. --This week, parents FREAKED THE HELL OUT at JCPenney for selling a girls sweatshirt with the slogan, quote, "I'm too pretty to do homework so my brother has to do it for me." --Apparently that sends the wrong message to girls or something. After enough parents complained and it started hitting the Internet, JCPenney pulled it from their website and shelves. --They said the sweatshirt was manufactured by a company called . . . Self Esteem. Seriously. (Consumerist) (--Here's a shot of the sweatshirt.)


A Man Named James Bond Wins a $6.5 Million Lottery Jackpot:

In Vincennes, Indiana, there's a 46-year-old man named JAMES BOND. Seriously. And for his entire life, he says, he's, quote, "taken a lot of ribbing" because of his name. --Well now, for the first time in his four-and-a-half decades on Earth . . . he might actually be COOLER than the OTHER James Bond. Because James Bond of Indiana just won a $6.5 MILLION lottery jackpot. --James Bond played the Illinois Lottery and, on August 13th, he won. He chose to take the lump sum of about $4.5 MILLION, which he collected at the Illinois lottery headquarters yesterday. --James Bond runs a construction company and says he plans to put some of his winnings into expanding his business. --As for how he got his name . . . his 64-year-old father is ALSO named James Bond. He's James Bond Senior . . . so he got the name about five or six years before IAN FLEMING created the James Bond character in 1953. --The James Bond who won the lottery is officially James Bond Junior. He doesn't have a son named James Bond the Third. (CBS 10 - Terre Haute, Indiana)


MEATBALL CRIMINALS

The San Francisco Giants' Payroll Manager Embezzled $1.5 Million in a Year, Including Giving Herself a Player's World Series Bonus:

The San Francisco Giants won the World Series last October, and each player received a World Series Bonus of $317,000 . . . and so did one of their payroll managers. --41-year-old Robin O'Connor has worked as the Giants payroll manager for four years, and she had an annual salary of $80,000. But she made a lot more than that last year. --The FBI says that Robin embezzled $1.5 million from player payroll accounts, from last June to this June. --Robin got caught when she tried to buy a house in San Diego last month. Her mortgage company, Bank of America, was suspicious of the huge money transfers in her personal accounts. --Robin explained that two payments totaling over $300,000 were her bonus for the team winning the World Series. She even forged a letter from the Giants front office saying she earned it, quote, "because of her outstanding contributions." --But Bank of America wasn't buying it. They sent a copy of the letter to the Giants for confirmation, and Robin's scheme unraveled. --Robin's been charged with fraud, and using a computer for fraud. Both are felonies with a penalty of up to five years in prison. (KGO)


Random News Extras . . . Random Links to Additional Stories:


According to a new study, the most discussed university on the internet is . . . Harvard. (Full Story)


Whites are now a minority in New York, D.C., Vegas, San Diego, and Memphis. Which brings the total number of U.S. cities where whites are a minority to . . . 23. (Full Story)


70% of college students say books are still their number one study resource. 26% say online reference sites . . . 19% say tutors . . . 15% say going to class. (???) (Full Story)


A 22-year-old in Alaska punched a bear in the face to save her dachshund, Fudge. (Full Story)

NAZZY’S VIDEOS OF THE DAY

#1.) George Lucas Added Audio of Vader Yelling "Noooooooo!" in the New "Return of the Jedi":

GEORGE LUCAS is releasing the original "Star Wars" trilogy on Blu-Ray this September 16th. And that can only mean one thing: "Star Wars" nerds in an uproar over the weird changes he keeps making. --Basically, whenever George Lucas releases a new version of "Star Wars" . . . whether it's on DVD, a boxed set, whatever . . . he tinkers with them by adding CGI special effects, adding deleted scenes, or removing previous changes that fans didn't like. --And this time even regular fans might get annoyed. Because at the end of "Return of the Jedi", he dubbed in audio of Darth Vader screaming "Noooooooo!" while the Emperor electrocutes Luke Skywalker. (--Search YouTube for "Darth Vader's 'Nooo!' in Star Wars: Episode VI - Return of the Jedi (ACTUAL Blu-Ray Clip)." On the one hand, it's not THAT bad. Although you shouldn't plan on winning that argument with a "Star Wars" purist.) (--On the other hand, unlike the minor changes Lucas has made over the years, you could argue that this change alters how you view a character. The great SIMON PEGG of "Shaun of the Dead" put it this way . . .) (--Quote, "Always loved Vader's wordless self sacrifice. Another [crappy], clueless, revision like Greedo and young Anakin's ghost." And if you know what Simon's talking about with those other examples . . . maybe it's time to get a life.) (--Lucas was probably trying to reference the end of "Episode III: Revenge of the Sith", where Vader yells "Nooooooo!" when he learns his wife is dead. But it was questionable there too. Oh yeah . . . and it's also a pop culture cliché.)


#2.) And Now . . . The News According to Snooki:

Apparently Snooki from "Jersey Shore" always wanted to be an anchorwoman. If you'd like to see how that would have turned out, you're in luck. We give you: The News According to Snooki. --She covers the hurricane, Beyoncé's pregnancy, and some Stupid News. It would have been funny if she'd actually tried to be a news anchor. But since it was done for hi-larious laughs, the three minutes she's "reporting" feel like an eternity. --Here are some highlights: --On Hurricane Irene: "I really hope that everyone on the east coast is okay . . . and if their homes are flooded, that sucks, and I'm sorry." --On Beyoncé: "I really think she's gonna have a really cute baby . . . tan obviously." (--CAREFUL!) On global warming: "I'm sweating in places I've never sweated before, so obviously the sun is coming closer to earth, and we're all just sweating our balls off."


#3.) Disturbing Video of Something Called a "Pregnant Robot Study Aid":

There's a video on YouTube that doesn't look new, but it's the first time we've seen it. It's a demonstration of something called a "Pregnant Robot Study Aid." --Basically, it's a plastic simulation of the lower half of a pregnant woman's body, so doctors can practice delivering babies when the woman is in different positions. And the audio of the plastic baby moaning its robotic baby cry is just horrifying. (--It sounds like maybe the audio was dubbed in, but still.)


#4.) Don Cheadle is . . . Captain Planet!

There's a new FunnyorDie Video where they make fun of corny after-school PSAs . . . environmental do-gooders . . . and crappy '80s TV superheroes, all at the same time. --It starts when a bunch of nerds combine their power rings to summon 'Captain Planet' . . . which turns out to be DON CHEADLE in silver face-paint and a green wig. --He stops the bad guys from hurting trees by turning THEM into trees. But then he starts flipping out and turning EVERYONE into a tree, starting with an innocent lady's dog, another woman's baby, then all of LA. --At the end, he tells the kids watching to save water and recycle, or else, quote, "I'll turn you into [an effing] tree." (--Search for "Don Cheadle is Captain Planet". He turns the dog into a tree at :54. WARNING! This video contains numerous hilarious F-bombs.)
Five More Places Germs Are Lurking:

Your kids are going back to school, so it won't be long before they bring home a nasty cold. And while you might not be able to prevent them from picking up germs at school, at least you can watch YOUR back. --Here's a list of five places germs are hiding . . . and how to avoid them.

#1.) Supermarkets. Everyone knows the shopping cart handles are disgusting. But the child seat on the cart can be even nastier. Just think about how many dirty diapers it comes in contact with. --The best method of defense is to carry sanitary wipes in your pocket, and wipe those key areas down before you start shopping. Some grocery stores offer wipes at the front for free.

#2.) At Work. Your desk at work could have 400 times more germs than a toilet seat. And thousands of bacteria are probably on your cell phone and keyboard. --So if you want to be really careful, wipe down your desk, phone, keyboard, and desk drawer handles every day.

#3.) In the Kitchen. Obviously, if you cut meat on a cutting board, you wash it before you use it for anything else. But people forget to clean all the things they touch WHILE they're cooking the meat. --It's really easy for bacteria to transfer onto salt shakers, the sink, the oven handle, and the refrigerator. So you should wipe all that stuff down every time you finish cooking.

#4.) Public Restrooms. The sinks and faucets have much more bacteria than the urinals and toilets do. And those hands-free faucets might NOT be any better. --A study at Johns Hopkins Medical School found that the water from hands-free sinks is actually DIRTIER than the water from regular sinks. They think that a more complex valve system might promote the growth of more bacteria. --If you want to be extra-careful . . . like Howard Hughes OCD careful . . . use a paper towel to touch everything, including the faucets, the soap dispenser, and the door handle when you leave.

#5.) Restaurants. There's a ton of bacteria on things you wouldn't think about, like the menus. And a 2007 study found that nearly 70% of the lemon wedges at 21 different restaurants contained e. coli bacteria. --Unless you want to use disinfectant wipes on THAT TOO, there's no way to tell how dirty the menu is. But just make sure it doesn't touch your plate or your silverware. And wash your hands after you give it back to the waiter. (Yahoo.com)