HOLLYWOOD DIRT OVERFLOW (03-31-11)

Rihanna Likes to be Spanked and Tied Up . . . And She Doesn't Ever Need to Speak to Chris Brown Again: RIHANNA doesn't just appear on the cover of the new "Rolling Stone" in painted-on shorts. She also gave them a pretty candid interview, in which she revealed her preferences in the bedroom. Not surprisingly, she's a little kinky. --She says, quote, "I like to be spanked. Being tied up is fun. I like to keep it spontaneous. Sometimes whips and chains can be overly planned [because] you gotta stop, get the whip from the drawer downstairs. I'd rather have him use his hands." --She adds, quote, "Being submissive in the bedroom is really fun. You get to be a little lady, to have somebody be macho and in charge . . . That's sexy to me." --Rihanna is also a bit of a masochist outside the bedroom . . . and that's not always such a good thing. She says, quote, "It's not something I'm proud of, and it's not something I noticed until recently. --"I think it's common for people who witness abuse in their household. They can never smell how beautiful a rose is unless they get pricked by a thorn." --Obviously, that's our segue into the part of the interview where Rihanna discusses CHRIS BROWN. First off, she addressed easing the restraining order that's been in place since he assaulted her in February of 2009. --She said, quote, "You can never please people. One minute I'm being too hard, and the next minute I'm a fool because I'm not being hard enough. --"It doesn't mean we're gonna make up, or even talk again. It just means I didn't want to object to the judge." --Rihanna says she's not jumping back into any kind of relationship with Chris . . . but at the same time, she's not interested in punishing him anymore, either. --She says, quote, "We don't have to talk again ever in my life. I just didn't want to make it more difficult for him professionally. What he did to me was a personal thing. It had nothing to do with his career. --"Saying he has to be a hundred feet away from me, he can't perform at awards shows, that definitely made it difficult for him. That was the only thing it was going to change, so I didn't care." --Rihanna admits she kept her emotions in check after the Chris Brown incident . . . quote, "I put my guard up so hard . . . I didn't want people to see me cry. I didn't want people to feel bad for me. --"It was a very vulnerable time in my life, and I refused to let that be the image. I wanted them to see me as, 'I'm fine, I'm tough.' I put that up until it felt real." Courteney Cox Went to the Caribbean with Josh Hopkins from "Cougar Town" . . . But It Was "Strictly Platonic": COURTENEY COX was photographed on the Caribbean island of St. Barts on Tuesday with "Cougar Town" co-star JOSH HOPKINS. --Coco . . . her 6-year-old daughter with DAVID ARQUETTE . . . was with them. (--Check out some pictures here.) --But Courteney's rep was quick to get out ahead of any rumors that might develop, saying, quote, "Courteney is there with Josh, Coco and some other good friends. Strictly platonic." --On "Cougar Town", Josh plays Courteney's boyfriend Grayson. Courteney has already been romantically linked to BRIAN VAN HOLT, who plays her ex-husband Bobby. Elizabeth Banks And Her Husband Have a New Baby Boy: ELIZABETH BANKS is a new mom. She and her husband Max Handelman welcomed a baby boy this week via surrogate mom. They named him Felix. -Banks said she and Max used a surrogate because, in her own words, quote, "I have a broken belly." Porno Companies Can Be Fined for Not Making Their Actors Wear Condoms . . . ? It's pretty rare to see porno actors wearing condoms. But if it were up to health officials in California, they ALL would. --OSHA fined two porno companies for not making their stars wear rubbers. --Hustler Video was fined $14,175 . . . and a company called Forsaken Pictures was pinched for $12,150. --The companies were fined for, quote, "failure to ensure the use of appropriate personal protective equipment." --It's the same law that requires hospitals to provide nurses with safety gear to protect them from fluid-borne illnesses. --I know what you're thinking: With condom use in pornography so rare, why don't we hear about more of these fines? --OSHA says it's constantly investigating the industry, and a few porno producers have been fined in recent years. But a common problem with policing the X-rated business is that JOB SITES ARE HARD TO FIND. Judge Judy Had to Be Rushed to the Hospital During a Taping of Her Show . . . Because of a Medical Episode Related to Oral Surgery: JUDGE JUDY had to be rushed to the hospital during a taping of her show yesterday . . . after she started saying things that didn't make sense and told her audience, quote, "I need to stop, I'm not feeling well." (--There's no word if there were any hevay bertations involved.) --Turns out the whole thing was related to oral surgery Judge Judy had the day before. Her rep says, quote, "She had oral surgery late Tuesday and didn't eat all day before the procedure and she had to take pain medication. --"She was told to take the day off but she said 'No, no I'll work.'" --He added, quote, "I just spoke to the judge who says she is feeling much better. She says all of the tests are negative and she's going home [today]. She will be back taping her show on April 12th, as scheduled." --Judy later told TMZ, quote, "I'm just exhausted, and my body was telling me it needed a day to chill. I was feeling funky this morning . . . funky enough that I knew someone should give a gander over what I got . . . I'm really fine. --"A lot of things just zoned together, including the bad news of the world. At my age, I know my body. My body is fine." --Cameras were rolling during the episode . . . but we haven't seen any video yet. Judge Judy is 68 years old. The Kardashian Girls Work 25 Hours a Day: Everyone has this idea of the KARDASHIAN girls as spoiled brats who don't work, and are just "famous for being famous." But their mom, KRIS JENNER, would like you to know that they DO work. And probably a lot harder than YOU. --Here's what she tells the new issue of "Redbook" . . . quote, "It's annoying when I hear, 'What do your girls do?' --"Well, first of all, all of my daughters have jobs. They are fashion stylists and designers; they own a chain of stores. They had the stores before they had the show. And my kids worked from the time they were 13 years old. --"So to me, that's a huge misconception, that the girls don't work. They work 25 hours a day. And that they don't have any talent? They might not be singers or dancers, but they certainly know how to produce a television show. --"Whether you want to call it talent or not, they have multiple shows on the air. [I want to say,] How many shows do you have?" Kim Kardashian Complains About Her Cellulite: --KIM KARDASHIAN . . . widely recognized as one of the most gorgeous women on Earth . . . has body image issues. --In the Middle Eastern edition of "Cosmo" . . . (--Yeah, who knew?) . . . KHLOE says, quote, "Kim, who I think is flawless, is always complaining. She complains about cellulite and I tell her, 'I'll trade your cellulite for my love handles.'" --Khloe may have love handles, but she also has a pretty thick skin . . . which is good, because she's constantly being compared to Kim and their other sister KOURTNEY. --She says, quote, "Kim and Kourtney have said to me, 'If we were put under the same negative attention that you are, we couldn't handle it.' If I want to wear a long flowing dress, someone will say I'm pregnant." --She adds, quote, "I believe we're not given any more than we can handle and most of the time I can handle it. But we all have fat days and if I'm having one of those days, those sorts of things make me feel down." Snooki Appeared at the "Wrestlemania 27" Press Conference . . . Where She Was Booed and Called a Slut: "Wrestlemania 27" goes down this Sunday night . . . and unless you've been incubating in an egg like Lady Gaga, you know that SNOOKI is part of this year's festivities. --She's teaming up with Trish Stratus and John Morrison to take on Dolph Ziggler, Michelle McCool and Layla. --Well, yesterday was the big "Wrestlemania 27" press conference . . . and when Snooki hit the podium, she got BOOED. --Some fans also chanted "slut" and "Hornswaggle". (--Hornswaggle is the WWE's resident LITTLE PERSON. He's usually dressed like a leprechaun.) (--You can check out video here.) (--To be fair, not everybody was booing and / or chanting. But the fans near whoever recorded this video were doing so quite loudly.) "Law & Order" Is Doing a Charlie Sheen Episode: "Law & Order" is still doing those cheesy "ripped from today's headlines" shows. And you had to know that a CHARLIE SHEEN episode was coming. It's happening on "Law & Order: Criminal Intent". --JAY MOHR . . . of "The Ghost Whisperer" and "Gary Unmarried" fame . . . will play a character called Nyle Brite. (--Get it: Bright . . . SHEEN?) (--Jay is probably still best known for a part he played 16 years ago . . . as A-hole sports agent Bob Sugar in "Jerry Maguire".) --Brite is described as a, quote, "rock-star fashion designer who is wildly unraveling in public." Oh, and he's a big fan of COCAINE AND HOOKERS. The plot revolves around a murder that occurs during a party at his house. --There's no word when the episode will air . . . but "Criminal Intent" begins its 10th and final season on May 1st. The show has been on the USA Network for the past few seasons ever since NBC demoted it to cable. --Meanwhile, the REAL Charlie Sheen will appear on the April 12th episode of "Drew Carey's Improv-A-Ganza" on the Game Show Network. Justin Bieber's "Never Say Never" Hits DVD on May 13th: Your daughter's been asking and asking and asking . . . and asking. And now you can finally tell her: The JUSTIN BIEBER movie, "Never Say Never", finally hits DVD on May 13th . . . which is a mere SIX WEEKS away. --Extras will include a DANCE-OFF between Justin and his crew. And we assume it'll be available in both 2D and 3D versions. A Fifth "Pirates of the Caribbean" Movie Is In the Works: The fourth "Pirates of the Caribbean" movie, "On Stranger Tides", doesn't even come out until May 20th . . . but producer JERRY BRUCKHEIMER is already working on #5. The screenplay is being written as we speak. --The first three "Pirates" flicks worked as a trilogy . . . with the same basic characters and a continuing storyline. --But Bruckheimer says the upcoming film . . . as well as any future installments . . . will be stand-alone stories. "Mad Men" Creator Matthew Weiner Says the Show's Fifth Season *Wasn't* Delayed By His Salary Demands: This week, AMC said that the fifth season of "Mad Men" has been delayed roughly eight months by contract negotiations with the show's creator, Matthew Weiner. But Weiner says the hold-up has NOTHING to do with his own financial greed. --He told a "Mad Man" fan site, quote, "There's been a lot of speculation and misinformation in the press about what is going on . . . I had nothing to do with this delay and it is not about money. I am fighting for the cast and for the show." --We'd heard he and AMC were negotiating a deal, which would pay Weiner $30 MILLION over two or three years. (--There are conflicting reports.) --But Weiner says, quote, "First of all, the number that's been published is not true. Second of all, I offered to have less money, to save the cast, and to leave the show in the running time that it's supposed to be. --"The harder that I've fought for the show, the more money they've offered me." (--You can find all his comments, here.) --Deadline.com has reported that AMC wanted to make more money off the show by adding product placement, cutting two minutes from each episode for more commercial time, and dropping two cast members. --It sounds like all those issues have yet to be resolved. Jennifer Lopez Isn't "Losing Sleep" Over Saving Casey Abrams: To quell any worries you may have, JENNIFER LOPEZ is not AGONIZING over the judges' decision to save CASEY ABRAMS on "American Idol" last week. --On RYAN SEACREST'S radio show yesterday, J-Lo said, quote, "We knew that it was kind of a radical decision because it was so early in the season, but to be quite honest . . . that is one decision that I haven't lost one ounce of sleep over. --"He's one of our most dynamic performers. He's so interesting and so talented. I know it's crazy, but we had to do it!" (--I don't care how J-Lo is coping with the SHOCK of implementing the "judges' save" so early . . . I'm worried about Casey. The guy seems pretty unstable, both mentally and physically. Is HE doin' OK?) --All three judges seemed pretty eager to make sure that everyone knew just how PROUD they are of their decision. Right after Casey's performance on last night's show RANDY JACKSON said, quote, "I'm sure that I speak for my fellow judges, I think it's one of the greatest saves we've ever had on this show: Saving you." --STEVEN TYLER added, quote, "I have to concur that one of the finest moments on this show was when we made that decision, putting you through." --And Jennifer closed with, "We've had to make some hard decisions and send some really, really great people home. And I've lost sleep over that. But one decision I didn't lost one ounce of sleep over was saving you. I slept like a baby!" Footage of the New Wonder Woman in Action! Some footage has surfaced of the new Wonder Woman in ACTION! And yes, it features ADRIANNE PALICKI in full costume. The video was apparently taken at a rehearsal. (--Check it out, here.) (--The parts where Wonder Woman is jumping on cars are surely a stunt double. You can briefly see Adrianne with the double at the 1:36 mark. And for a better look, here are some stills.) Arnold Schwarzenegger Is Now a Superhero Called "The Governator": Former California Governor ARNOLD SCHWARZENEGGER is developing a new superhero called The Governator, which . . . naturally . . . will be based on his life. He's working on the project with comic book legend STAN LEE. --The Governator will have his own comic book and animated TV series . . . both of which are expected to be out sometime NEXT year. --Arnold tells "Entertainment Weekly", quote, "When I ran for governor and I started hearing people talking about 'the Governator,' I thought the word was so cool. The word 'Governator' combined two worlds: The world of politics and the movie world." --Stan Lee adds, quote, "We're using [Arnold's] wife. We're using his kids. We're using the fact that he used to be governor. Only after he leaves the governor's office, Arnold decides to become a crime fighter and builds a secret high-tech crime-fighting center under his house in Brentwood." --Of course, The Governator will face-off against recurring villains, including "an evil organization called 'Gangsters Imposters Racketeers Liars and Irredeemable Ex-cons,' or G.I.R.L.I.E. Men for short." (--It's unclear what superhero capabilities The Governator will have that the real Arnold doesn't, but it'd be kinda cool if 'balancing a budget' is one of them.) Thursday TV Reminders: (--Check your local listings.) --"American Idol" [Results Show] . . . 8:00 to 9:00 P.M. on Fox. (--Fantasia Barrino, Will.I.Am and Jamie Foxx perform.) --"Grey's Anatomy: The Musical Event" . . . 9:00 to 10:00 P.M. on ABC. (--Callie sees events as a series of songs sung by the rest of the cast as her life, and the life of her unborn baby, hang in the balance following her car accident.) (--You can see a preview, with Callie singing "Chasing Cars" by Snow Patrol here. Brandi Carlisle's "The Story"and "How to Save a Life" by The Fray are among the other songs performed by the cast.) --"Mobbed" . . . 9:00 to 10:00 P.M. on Fox. (--Howie Mandel is the host, and his guests are surprised by flash mobs, which include song-and-dance routines to celebrate important moments in their lives.) --"Jersey Shore" [Reunion Show] . . . 10:00 to 11:00 P.M. on MTV. --"John Oliver's New York Stand-Up Show" . . . Midnight to 1:00 A.M. on Comedy Central. (--Comedians Deon Cole, Moshe Kasher, Marina Franklin and Maria Bamford perform.) THE REBECCA BLACK ATTACK Rebecca Black's "Friday" Follow-Up Will Be . . . "LOL": In REBECCA BLACK'S ingenious debut single "Friday", she tells us that Friday is followed by Saturday. But in Rebecca's newfound music career, "Friday" is followed by "LOL". Yes, that's the name of the new single she's working on. (--That's perfect! We, we, we so excited!!!) --According to Britain's not-always-reliable "Sun" tabloid, the hook to "LOL" is: Quote, "BFF you make me LOL." (--Sweet, sounds like CLASSIC Rebecca Black.) --Rebecca says, quote, "I am in a studio working on my debut album . . . just like 'Friday', the new songs are pretty catchy." Sadly, there aren't any other details yet. --By the way, Rebecca still has a positive attitude about the fact that no one likes "Friday". She says, quote, "People were saying, 'You're the worst singer, this is the worst song.' They criticized my voice and the lyrics. --"But I call them 'Negative Nancies.' They can try to rain on my parade but as far as I'm concerned they are raining on their own parade." Patrice Wilson Isn't Just the Rapper in "Friday" . . . He's the Proud CEO: The CEO of Ark Music Factory . . . the company that basically created REBECCA BLACK . . . is a man named Patrice Wilson. You know him as the creepy, way-too-old-to-be-associated-with-these-middle-school-girls rapper that pops up in the middle of the "Friday" video, calling Rebecca "R.B." --Well, Wilson claims they made everything bad . . . intentionally. -He says, quote, "I believe that in 10 years from now people will look at that song 'Friday' as a historical song, because it competed on the charts and it was from an independent production company . . . --"Yeah, people didn't like the song, didn't like the music video, they thought it was really cheesy. But that was the whole point, to create something that was really simple but something that sticks in people's head. --"To have people say 'I hate this song, but I'm still singing it.'" (--So, it's kinda like that woman at the office who keeps telling you that's she's not interested, and to stop stalking her because she's scared of you . . .) --Wilson also actually ADMITS to writing the "Friday's" lyrics. He explains, quote, "I wrote the lyrics on a Thursday night going into a Friday. I was writing different songs all night and was like, 'Wow, I've been up a long time and it's Friday.' --"And I was like, wow, it is Friday!" (--It's actually cool to know that such a preeminent songwriter, CEO and rapper keeps such a traditional work week.) Chris Brown Landed His First #1 Album: It was a busy week on the "Billboard" chart with seven new albums debuting in the Top 10. CHRIS BROWN landed his first #1 with "F.A.M.E", as it moved 270,000 copies. JENNIFER HUDSON'S second album, "I Remember Me", sold 165,000 copies in 2nd place. 1.) (NEW) "F.A.M.E.", Chris Brown (270,000 copies) 2.) (NEW) "I Remember Me", Jennifer Hudson (165,000 copies) 3.) "21", Adele (96,000 copies) Carson Daly Has Ripped Britney Spears' People for Trying to Being Too Controlling: CARSON DALY tore into BRITNEY SPEARS' handlers on Twitter . . . because they wouldn't let him interview Britney without controlling the whole thing themselves. --Carson Tweeted, quote, "I was just TOLD my @BritneySpears interview tomorrow MUST be pre-recorded and submitted for approval by HER management before it can air! F THAT!" (--The interview was scheduled for Tuesday on Carson's radio show on 97.1 AMP out of Southern California.) --He added, quote, "Never that restricted. Even when I interviewed Michael Jackson, it wasn't anything like this . . . it's really insane." -When someone on Twitter suggested that Carson was acting unprofessional, he responded, quote, "I'M UNPROFESSIONAL? FAKING AN ENTIRE INTERVIEW? Just shocked her management won't let her do a normal interview. --"She probably doesn't even know. I've known and supported her since she was 15. This has nothing to do with her. Just her people." Britney Spears' Album Is on Pace to Debut at #1: BRITNEY SPEARS' new album, "Femme Fatale", is on pace to debut at #1 on the album charts next week. (--The first week numbers will be tallied through Sunday, but the results won't be announced until next Wednesday.) --The site HitsDailyDouble.com estimates that "Femme Fatale" will sell between 275,000 and 300,000 copies by the end of the week. --This week's other big new release, rapper WIZ KHALIFA'S "Rolling Papers", is expected to sell between 190,000 and 215,000 copies. Vanilla Ice Has Landed a Gig . . . Miming: VANILLA ICE . . . who goes by the alias ROB VAN WINKLE in the real world . . . found a place in all of our hearts using his VOICE. Now, he's pursuing a passion that doesn't involve his voice . . . miming. Seriously. --Ice will play a silent version of Captain Hook in a stage performance of "Peter Pan". (--Sadly, this is happening in England . . . however, it isn't scheduled until December, so there's plenty of time to find a decent plane fare.) --Vanilla has never done pantomime before . . . so why was he cast? For the CHILDREN. The theater's manager says, quote, "Ice is a huge name who I'm sure will be a real draw for parents and children alike." THURSDAY'S SHOWBIZ EXTRAS The website PopEater.com has put together a little mini-list of the Worst Celebrity Parents in History. They include the Lohans, Joe Simpson, Ryan O'Neal, Joe Jackson and Joan Crawford. (Full Story) Forbes.com has come out with the Animation A-List. It's a list of the stars whose animated films from the last 10 years have earned the most money. Mike Myers, Cameron Diaz and Eddie Murphy all tied for first place thanks to the "Shrek" movies . . . which have grossed a combined $3 BILLION. (Full Story) LEONARDO DICAPRIO is going to shoot a Chinese cell phone commercial . . . for which he'll be paid $5 MILLION. (Full Story) "Bones" star DAVID BOREANAZ settled that sexual harassment suit filed by an extra on the show who claimed he offered to help her career in exchange for CARNAL FAVORS. There's no word on the terms of the settlement. (Full Story) DENNIS HOPPER'S widow is suing his estate for the return of property she claims is hers . . . including a juicer and asparagus tongs. (Full Story) PETA is going after the CEO of GoDaddy.com for shooting and killing an African elephant. But he claims it was a PROBLEM ELEPHANT that was destroying a village's crops, and he had the support of the tribal elders. (Full Story) SARAH SILVERMAN will guest star on an upcoming episode of "The Good Wife". She's playing a "smart, funny owner of a sexually explicit website [that's] devoted to connecting married people who are looking to have affairs." (Full Story) Rapper Jim Jones was arrested in New York yesterday for driving with a suspended license. (Full Story) (--There's some video of the arrest at that link, but you can't really see what's going on.) RadarOnline.com claims "most of the cast" of "Jersey Shore" has yet to be locked down for the show's fourth season, which is about to begin filming in Italy. There's been no official comment. (Full Story) Former "Arrested Development" star WILL ARNETT has been cast in an untitled NBC pilot, which also stars CHRISTINA APPLEGATE. It's a comedy. (Full Story) We assume this kills the rumor that Will might take over for STEVE CARELL on "The Office" next season. NAZZY’S RANDOM STUFF Four Out of Five Women Admit They Kinda Hate Most of Their Facebook Friends: Here's more proof that your Facebook friends aren't really your friends. Because, odds are . . . you secretly HATE them. --A new survey of 400 women found that 83%, or more than four out of five, admit they've kinda grown to HATE most of their Facebook friends. And these are the reasons why . . . --65% say their friends share too many boring or pointless updates too often. --63% say their friends complain all the time. --46% say their friends "like" too many posts. --41% say their friends use Facebook inappropriately, or too frequently, to promote political or social causes. --40% say their friends use Facebook to clearly provide false info or images that show off a perfect life. --And 16% say their friends post too many photos of their damn kids. --The survey also found that 61% of women say they're Facebook friends with a drama queen . . . 35% are friends with a "frenemy" . . . and 26% are friends with someone who always puts up airbrushed or touched-up photos. (Mashable) Worst Blind Date Ever? About an Hour In, Two People Realize They're Long Lost Siblings: We've got a story today out of London that's about the absolute WORST blind date ever. Yes, even worse than the one you had where the person who showed up was an honest-to-God troll. Like, they actually lived under a bridge and everything. --42-year-old Sarah Kemp of Edinburgh, Scotland met 47-year-old George Bentley of London on a dating site. Last week, Sarah traveled to London so they could meet face-to-face and go on a date. --About an hour in, they realized two things. One, they had great chemistry. And two . . . the reason for that chemistry was probably because they're LONG LOST SIBLINGS. --And, because we KNOW you're thinking it . . . they figured that out before things got anywhere close to being all sexual and weird. --They grew up together until their parents divorced in 1975. Sarah was five and George was 10 at the time. Sarah moved with their mother to Scotland . . . and George stayed in London with their father. And they completely fell out of touch. --George says, quote, "I had absolutely no idea where she was. I [searched], but after a while, I think both Sarah and I gave up looking." --Now that they've reconnected, they say they're going to work on rebuilding their relationship . . . as siblings. (AOL News) The New "Breast Milk Baby" Doll Teaches Your Daughter How To Breastfeed: Remember when those dolls came out that would poop themselves and we all thought THAT was taking things too far? A company called Berjuan Toys in Spain just blew those dolls out of the water. -They've introduced a new doll called the "Breast Milk Baby" . . . which, like you might guess, is a baby doll designed to BREASTFEED. --The doll costs $89 and comes with a special shirt your kid puts on. The shirt has little flowers over the general nipple areas. When the baby's lips make contact with those flowers, it starts making slurping and gurgling noises. --This toy has been around in Spain for a few years, but now it's made its way over here. --According to a U.S. spokesman from Berjuan Toys, they've gotten plenty of complaints about the doll, but he thinks they're all off base. --Quote, "As Americans, we've been duped into believing there's something shameful and taboo about breastfeeding, but the truth is, that idea was created to sell more baby formula. --"The Breast Milk Baby is a serious product, created by a small, family-owned, Christian toy manufacturer who strongly believes in the benefits of feeding babies the natural, God-given way. Little girls need to learn to breastfeed." (Parentdish) (--You can see the dolls and maybe even buy one here.) The FBI is Trying To Solve a Murder From 1999 . . . and Wants Your Help To Crack a Code: You've taken so, so much from this world. Here's your chance to give back and be a HERO. They might even make a movie about you. Where you'll be played by JAKE GYLLENHAAL or ANNE HATHAWAY. --The FBI needs help cracking a code. And they're reaching out to the public to help. --On June 30th, 1999, a 41-year-old man named Ricky McCormick was found murdered in St. Louis. The only clues were two notes, written in some kind of code, that were stuffed into his pockets. --The FBI's codebreakers haven't been able to figure them out. So after 12 years, they're looking for help. An FBI official says, quote, "Maybe someone with a fresh set of eyes [will] come up with a brilliant new idea." --There's no official reward if you do crack the code. And, of course, there's a chance it's not even a code and it's just gibberish. But if you DO crack it and help them solve the murder, you'll be nationally recognized as a hero. (Yahoo News) (--Here are the two notes. Go ahead and crack them!) (--And if you do solve the problem, send your findings to FBI Laboratory, Cryptanalysis and Racketeering Records Unit, 2501 Investigation Parkway, Quantico, VA 22135. Attn: Ricky McCormick Case.) Only 10% of Americans Say That If They Were Invisible For a Day, They'd Sneak Into a Men's or Women's Locker Room: When I say "If you had the power of invisibility, what would you do first?" . . . I know your mind jumped straight to "Locker room." Even if you give me a different answer, it's a scientific fact that the first thing you thought of was seeing people naked. -Which is why I'm incredibly skeptical of the results of this survey. Nestle asked Americans about all sorts of things related to "fun." (--Yep, roll your eyes . . .) One of the questions was: "What would you do if you were invisible for a day?" --Only 10% of people said they'd sneak into a men's or women's locker room. For what it's worth, FOUR TIMES more men picked this option than women. But, yes, some women DID go with this. --The most popular answer was "play a prank on my friends," at 48%. 24% said they'd sneak backstage at a concert, and 18% said they'd spy on people. --The survey also found that 36% of adults think that there should be NAPS in the workplace . . . 47% say the best way to relieve stress after a long day is reading . . . 34% say the best part of Facebook is seeing photos of old friends . . . --36% wish they could live in a futuristic world like "The Jetsons" . . . and finally, more than 50% of people think it would be cool if dodgeball was an Olympic sport. (PR Newswire) A New Deodorant From Dove Claims It Won't Just Keep Your Armpits From Smelling . . . It Will Actually Make Them Look Better: If you weren't self-conscious about how your armpits looked before, you should be now. Because, according to the good people at Dove, your armpits are UGLY. Or, at least, they're implying that. --They just released a new brand of deodorant called Dove Ultimate Go Sleeveless, and they say it won't just keep your armpits from smelling . . . it will actually make them LOOK BETTER. --The deodorant contains a special formula of moisturizers that help clean up your underarm skin after breakouts, discoloration, and razor burn. It goes on sale this week. (Wall Street Journal) Last Year, Airlines Worldwide Lost 29.4 Million Bags . . . That's the Equivalent of One Bag For Every Person In Texas and Kentucky: Even though almost all of the airlines charge baggage fees now, that doesn't mean they're doing ANY better at actually making sure you and your luggage arrive in the same place at the same time. In fact . . . they're getting worse. --The data is in from 2010 and . . . lost luggage went up 6% from 2009. Worldwide, airlines lost 29.4 million bags . . . plenty of which people paid $25 and up to check. --That's the equivalent of 12 mishandled bags for every 1,000 passengers . . . or, in total, they lost the equivalent of one bag for every person in Texas and Kentucky combined. (ABC News) 71% of People Think Air Travel is Better Today than Ten Years Ago: Apparently there are a LOT of masochists out there . . . because if you actually think air travel today is GOOD, then you're clearly the kind of person who likes to be punished, degraded, and probably whipped. --According to a new survey by Orbitz, a shocking . . . SHOCKING . . . 71% of people say that air travel is better today than it was ten years ago, in 2001. --They say that even though at this point in 2001, it was still the pre-9/11 flying era . . . so there were shorter security lines, cheaper flights, no bans on liquids, your family could meet you at the gate, no bag fees, free meals on planes, all that. --So WHY do people think air travel is better now? The main reason . . . and this is according to a survey by Orbitz, remember . . . is that now it's easier to comparison shop for flight prices online. (--You can only begin to imagine how they must've phrased the questions in this survey to produce that result. Maybe: "We all know air travel is great, especially comparison shopping for flights. Say nothing if you agree.") --Other reasons people gave are online booking and check-in, more access to deals and discounts, more freedom to choose seats, more safety on planes, and Wi-Fi on planes. --People said the WORST thing about travel today versus 10 years ago is . . . the new fee structure. Baggage fees, check-in fees, all that. The second-worst part of air travel today is the extra security rules. Third-worst is flight cancelations. (PR Newswire) A Team of Office Workers Win a $319 Million Jackpot, Which is Great News . . . Except For the One Guy Who Usually Plays But Decided To Sit This Week Out: Last Friday, a team of seven IT workers from the New York state Homes and Community Renewal Agency in Albany, New York bought their weekly Mega Millions lottery tickets . . . AND WON. --They overcame one-in-176 million odds to win a $319 MILLION Mega Millions jackpot. --And obviously, that's great news. Except for one guy from their office. --According to the reports, this guy throws in on the lottery pool every week. But last week, he decided to save a few bucks by sitting out. --Jill Cook owns Cook's Deli in Albany where the IT workers always eat lunch. She says, quote, "The word is that when they were going around the office, [this guy] said no, he wasn't feeling lucky. --"They asked him twice. They said, 'Are you sure?' And he said yeah, he was going to pass this time. I feel horrible for him." --His co-workers took the lump sum option. Divided evenly, they're all going to wind up with $16 MILLION after taxes. If this other guy had jumped in, the pie would've been divided eight ways, and they all would've taken home about $14 MILLION. --According to the Homes and Community Renewal Agency, none of them showed up for work on Monday . . . but they haven't formally quit their jobs yet. (New York Post) The Happiest Careers In the U.S. Include Biotechnology, Education . . . and Customer Service? According to a new study, people in BIOTECHNOLOGY are the HAPPIEST workers in the country. So . . . um . . . maybe it's time to train someone else on the deep fryer and switch careers. --CareerBliss.com analyzed nine different factors that go into people's career happiness. They include everything from work environment and relationships with coworkers, to salary and growth opportunities. --Biotechnology came in first because there's a lot of room for growth, high salaries, and good collaborative environments. --Believe it or not, CUSTOMER SERVIVE came in second. Workers feel a lot of control over their work and, if you like helping people and problem solving, it can actually be a good career choice. --The rest of the top 10 are: Education . . . administrative and clerical . . . purchasing . . . accounting . . . finance . . . nonprofit . . . healthcare . . . and legal. --They didn't release a list of the most depressing jobs. (--So if you hate your job, just assume it came in number one.) (Yahoo Finance) A Trucker Chokes on a Piece of Apple, Crashes Into the Median . . . Which Dislodges the Apple and Saves His Life: I like reading a story about a trucker slamming his rig into a concrete median . . . and SAVING LIVES in the process. It almost NEVER goes down like that. --On Tuesday, around 9:00 A.M., 55-year-old Richard Paylor of Fairless Hills, Pennsylvania was driving his rig down a freeway in Reading, Pennsylvania while eating an apple. --He took a bite, it went down wrong, and Richard started CHOKING on the apple. Then, he BLACKED OUT. --His truck veered off the road and slammed into the concrete median. --And that's when the miracle happened. The impact jarred Richard forward . . . the steering wheel basically Heimliched him . . . and the piece of apple came flying out of his mouth. The accident probably saved his life. --It was a massive accident . . . concrete was everywhere, and thousands of people were stuck in both directions for FIVE HOURS while the city cleaned up the scene. But, most important, no one was hurt. --Richard says that in 23 years of truck driving this is his first accident other than a little scrape or fender bender. Quote, "I guess it wasn't my time." (Reading Eagle) A Woman is Gardening When the Sinkhole In Her Yard Swallows Her Up . . . For the Second Time In a Year: Maybe it's time for 47-year-old Carla Chapman of Plant City, Florida, to stop hanging out in her backyard. --Back in May of 2010, Carla was weeding when a SINKHOLE suddenly opened in the ground and swallowed her up. She was stuck ten feet underground for two hours before a neighbor came home, heard her screams, and called 911. --She suffered minor injuries but was otherwise OK. Her insurance company told her it was a fluke and her house was safe from sinkholes. --Fast forward to Monday morning, when Carla was in the backyard again, gardening . . . and it turned out her insurance company was wrong. ANOTHER sinkhole opened up and swallowed her up AGAIN. --So, yeah, she's been swallowed by two sinkholes in less than a year. --This time she was lucky enough to have her cell phone with her and called 911. Firefighters came and pulled her out of the hole. She was treated for minor injuries and released. (CBS 10 - Tampa) If You Want to Look Good To Someone At the Mall, Make Sure They See You Riding Up, Not Down, the Escalator: This is a completely random study out of the University of North Carolina . . . but, I guess, it should help you the next time you're at the mall and trying to get the attention of those super sexy employees at Hot Dog on a Stick. --Researchers at UNC found that people will think you're more IMPRESSIVE if they see you riding UP an escalator or walking UP a flight of stairs than if they see you walking DOWN. No, really. --They believe the reason is that we subconsciously link height to power. So when someone sees you moving upward, it gives a slight illusion that you're getting taller . . . which makes you more impressive. (Scientific American) MEATBALL CRIMINALS A Man is Arrested For Throwing a Cheeseburger At Another Driver In the McDonald's Drive Thru: Over the weekend, 43-year-old Brant Stephens of Fort Pierce, Florida was going through the McDonald's drive thru and became FURIOUS with someone else in the line. So after he got his cheeseburger . . . he threw it at the guy's truck. --The police report says it left a, quote, "large spot" of ketchup and cheeseburger pieces on the truck. The driver called the police. --When they got there, Brant told them, quote, "I threw a cheeseburger at that [racial slur]'s truck. He pissed me off. And if I have to go to jail for it then that's OK. Brant was arrested for misdemeanor criminal mischief. (Treasure Coast Palm) RANDOM NEWS EXTRAS A 13-year-old go-kart driver in Poland has been suspended . . . for DOPING. He's appealing his suspension. (Full story) Check out the 10 states that have the highest lottery ticket spending. Massachusetts is number one . . . people spend an average of $806.57 per person on lottery tickets. (Full story) PETA is running a contest: Get your pet spayed or neutered and write an essay. If you win, they'll pay for your VASECTOMY. (Full story) In Washington, police had to pry an obese man out of a chair where he'd been living for two years. It was so bad the fabric had fused with his skin. He later DIED at the hospital. (Full story) A woman in New York is suing her plastic surgeon after he botched an eyelid surgery and made it so she can't close her eyes. (Full story) Mother of the Year candidate here. A woman fought with her boyfriend over a bag of reefer, then used her five-year-old as a human shield to keep the cops from Tasering her. (Full story) According to the latest numbers, current members of Congress have racked up at least $15,000 in parking tickets. (Full story) NAZZY’S RANDOM VIDEOS OF THE DAY #1.) A Woman Couldn't Recite the Alphabet During a Sobriety Test, and the Cop's Dashcam Footage Is a Hit on YouTube: A woman in Ohio named Nancy Bodo got pulled over on Saturday for drunk driving, and now the dashcam video of her sobriety test is a hit on YouTube. --First, the cop asks her to recite the alphabet, starting with the letter D and ending with W, and she starts off strong. But she ends up skipping Q, R, S, T, U and V, then tries two more times and does the exact same thing. --And when the cop asks her to count backward from 69 and stop at 53, she skips 61, then doesn't stop until she gets to 40. (--Search for "Alphabet Fail Sobriety Test." She starts reciting the alphabet at :07 and starts counting backward at 1:32.) #2.) A Website Called ScaleOfTheUniverse.com Lets You Zoom In and Out to Show Just How Big the Universe Is: One light year is the equivalent of about 5.9 TRILLION miles. And the observable universe is about 14 BILLION light years across, which is way too big to even imagine. But there's a cool website that can give you some idea of how small we all are. --It's called ScaleOfTheUniverse.com, and by using a slider at the bottom of a flash video, it lets you zoom in and out, showing the size of an atom compared to the Earth, compared to the whole universe. Plus, it shows everything in between. #3.) A Monster Truck Driver Successfully Landed a Backflip in Las Vegas Over the Weekend: One of the most famous monster trucks in the history of the sport is called GRAVE DIGGER, and the driver's name is Dennis Anderson. But at Monster Jam 2011 in Las Vegas over the weekend, it was Dennis's son Ryan who stole the show. --Driving a truck named SON-UVA DIGGER, Ryan successfully landed a BACKFLIP. Apparently it's not the first backflip ever landed in a monster truck, but it's still impressive. And it looks like it shouldn't even be possible. (--Search TotalProSports.com for "Ryan Anderson Monster Truck Backflip.") Five Body Language Mistakes to Avoid on Your Next Date: If you're gearing up for a big date this weekend, AskMen.com has a new list of the worst body-language mistakes you can make. Here are the top five. #1.) Accelerated Body Language. When some people get nervous, they start doing things faster, like eating fast or flailing their arms around while they talk. And if you do it on a date, it can make you look TOO nervous, and even insecure. --Also, don't play around with the salt and pepper shakers or anything else on the table. It makes you look bored. #2.) Nodding Too Much. Nodding a LITTLE bit is good because it shows you're listening, and you agree with certain things the person says. But too much nodding can make it seem like you're NOT really listening. #3.) Crossing Your Arms. When you do it, you're literally closing yourself off to the other person. So even if you feel more comfortable with your arms crossed, you shouldn't do it on a date. #4.) Intense Eye Contact. Eye contact is essential on a date, but too much can make you look psychotic. --So as a general rule, if you're just sitting there eating or doing something else where no one's talking, don't maintain eye contact for more than a few seconds. #5.) Being Too Grabby. This one's just for guys: Guys, if it's your first or second date, she should be the first one to initiate any kind of physical contact, like holding hands or touching your arm. -Because if YOU initiate contact, it can seem threatening, and she might also assume you're only interested sex. (AskMen.com)

HOLLYWOOD DIRT OVERFLOW (03-30-11)

Did Mariah Carey Go Into Labor Yesterday? MARIAH CAREY may have gone into labor yesterday. Because early in the evening, NICK CANNON posted the following Tweet . . . --"On a plane back to NY. Praying Dem Babies wait for DADDY to come back b4 they pop out!" Sources Now Say Kevin Federline's Girlfriend Is Five Months Pregnant: There's still no official word, but so-called "sources" say that KEVIN FEDERLINE'S girlfriend, Victoria Prince, is five months pregnant. She and Kevin are said to be, quote, "totally happy." --This will be your man K-Fed's FIFTH child. With BRITNEY SPEARS, he has two sons . . . 5-year-old Sean Preston and 4-year-old Jayden. --And he has two kids with his pre-Britney girlfriend, SHAR JACKSON . . . an 8-year-old daughter named Kori and a 6-year-old son named Kaleb. Pink Says Pregnancy Has Made Her Clumsy: I'm sure a lot of ladies can relate to this: PINK says pregnancy has made her clumsy. She Tweeted, quote, "I am the clumsiest I have ever been in my life. Fell AGAIN today! I feel like my 92 yr old grammom … #dumb." --She added, quote, "I just feel . . . silly. I fell up the stairs." --At least her pregnancy is going better than her mother's. Pink also Tweeted, quote, "My dad drug her by her coat 20 feet hanging from the car door in snow when I was in her tummy." Rob Lowe Reveals What He Thought About the "Brat Pack" In His New Autobiography: ROB LOWE has a new autobiography coming out called "Stories I Only Tell My Friends". --The new issue of "Vanity Fair" includes excerpts from a chapter in which Rob talks about meeting all his new co-stars prior to filming the 1983 classic "The Outsiders". Here are some of his recollections . . . --TOM CRUISE: "He's open, friendly, funny, and has an almost robotic, bloodless focus and an intensity that I've never encountered before . . . [He's] zeroed in like a laser." --PATRICK SWAYZE: "Makes Tom Cruise look lobotomized . . . as cool as you want, wearing tight jeans and a tattered, sleeveless Harley-Davidson T-shirt revealing his massive, ripped arms. (This is his uniform, he never changes it, and if I looked like him, neither would I.)" --DIANE LANE: "At only 16, she already seems like a legend . . . I watch as she breezes by with her chaperone. With all the teen testosterone on this movie, she'll need one!" --MATT DILLON: Lowe describes an incident in which he watched Dillon . . . who was one of the few "Outsiders" cast members who was already an established star . . . pick up a groupie. --He adds, quote, "Matt (effin') Dillon. My hero." --Lowe also talks about CHARLIE SHEEN . . . one of the few future Brat-Packers who WASN'T in "The Outsiders". (--His brother, EMILIO ESTEVEZ, was in it.) --He says that in the late '80s, he and Charlie, quote, "competed to see who could play harder, then show up for work and still kick ass. The verdict: Charlie by a nose." --He also calls Charlie, quote, "one-of-a-kind . . . a Polo preppy clotheshorse in a world of O.P. shorts and surf T-shirts . . . [He was] a wonderful mix of nerd . . . and rebel." --And he remembers being blown away by the Sheens' opulent lifestyle . . . quote, "[It was a] never-ending Häagen-Dazs, brand-new BMWs, a lagoon pool with underwater tunnels, and a lit, professional-grade basketball half-court." (--You can listen to Rob reading an excerpt from the book . . . including the big Matt Dillon hookup story . . . here. WARNING!!! There is unbleeped profanity in this clip.) Did Weird Al Yankovic and Dhani Jones of the Cincinnati Bengals Try Out to be the New Voice of the Aflac Duck? There are probably very few instances in which WEIRD AL YANKOVIC and Cincinnati Bengals linebacker DHANI JONES are competing for the same job. --But the "Wall Street Journal" claims they've both auditioned to be the new voice of the Aflac duck. -Weird Al denies it . . . but Dhani confirms he's trying to get the gig. Like a lot of NFL players, he's worried about a potential players' strike this season . . . so he's looking for a new source of income. --Aflac says that more than 1,000 people have sent in audition videos . . . including a 93-year-old woman. --GILBERT GOTTFRIED had been the voice of the Aflac duck since the year 2000. But they fired him earlier this month, after he Tweeted a dozen insensitive jokes about the earthquake and tsunami in Japan. (--If you're interested in the job, you can apply here.) (--On a related note, Gilbert made a HI-larious video from FunnyOrDie.com of Gilbert telling inappropriate jokes TOO SOON at various points in history. Check it out here.) Zsa Zsa Gabor Was Rushed Back to the Hospital Again Last Night: ZSA ZSA GABOR was rushed back to the hospital last night because she was spitting up blood and having trouble breathing. --Her husband, Prince Frederic von Anhalt, told TMZ that he was, quote, "really worried we may lose her this time." (--That's the last we heard about her condition as of late last night.) Elizabeth Taylor Had a Genetic Mutation . . . That Made Her Even More Beautiful: Here's something you probably didn't know about ELIZABETH TAYLOR: She had a GENETIC MUTATION. But it wasn't anything freaky like a third arm or a second uterus. It was actually something that made her even more beautiful than she already was. --According to the 2006 biography "Elizabeth", by J. Randy Taraborrelli, Liz had double rows of eyelashes . . . which enhanced her already-gorgeous eyes. --An extra row of eyelashes is a condition known as distichiasis. Eye specialists also refer to it as an "accessory row" of lashes. It can cause eye irritation . . . but there's no word if it ever bothered Elizabeth. --It's said to occur as a result of a mutation of the "FOXC2" gene. (--You can insert your own "Foxy" joke here.) Jackie Chan Is Not Dead: There's a report going around that JACKIE CHAN died of a heart attack. He didn't. --A note on his Facebook page says, quote, "Jackie is alive and well . . . [He] is fine and is busy preparing for the filming of his next movie." Did Denise Richards Increase Her Security Because of Charlie Sheen's Threats? DENISE RICHARDS has reportedly beefed up her security after being threatened on Twitter by CHARLIE SHEEN over those two dogs she allegedly "stole" from him. --A source says, quote, "Denise and her girls live a simple life. She wants Sam and Lola to have normal lives, but after the recent threats and verbal attacks, she has increased her security. --"When you are dealing with a mad man, it's better to be safe than sorry." Why Is Charlie Sheen Working with Snoop Dogg and the Guitarist from Filter? CHARLIE SHEEN posted a picture on Twitter recently of himself with SNOOP DOGG and FILTER guitarist ROBERT PATTERSON. (--You can see it here.) --The picture was captioned, quote, "Warlock meets his makers-music makers that is @SnoopDog @robpatterson666 get ready to rock the Sheenius within!" -So what's the deal? Frankly, we don't know. What we do know is that Patterson is going out on tour with Charlie as his "musical director". So if the three of them were recording something, it was probably for his live shows. (--By the way . . . Here's a news report claiming that no hotels in New York City want to put Charlie up when he goes there to do his comedy shows.) Lindsay Lohan Will Not Be Charged For that Scuffle At the Betty Ford Clinic: Remember when LINDSAY LOHAN snuck out of the Betty Ford Clinic last December . . . then allegedly got into a scuffle with a female employee while she was breaking back in? --Well, that case is officially closed. The D.A. dropped it due to insufficient evidence. Here's one reason they probably didn't have enough evidence: The alleged victim, Dawn Holland, didn't want Lindsay prosecuted. Lindsay Lohan Left Samantha Ronson's House . . . Clutching an "I Love You" Bear: Forget about those pictures we saw the other day of SAMANTHA RONSON kissing another chick. --Monday morning at about 4:00 A.M., LINDSAY LOHAN was seen leaving Sam's house clutching a teddy bear. And not just any bear. This bear was holding a heart with the words "I Love You" stitched on it. (--Check out the pics here.) Jennifer Garner is the New Miss Marple: Disney recently announced it was going to revive the classic crime-solving character Miss Marple. --For those of you who don't know, Miss Marple was the creation of author AGATHA CHRISTIE. She was an old British spinster-type who went around, well, solving crimes. (--Because that's what crime-solvers do, ya know.) --You could probably say she was the prototype for ANGELA LANSBURY'S character in "Murder, She Wrote". --Yesterday they announced who would play the new Miss Marple. And you'll never guess who it is: JENNIFER GARNER. --Obviously, they're "rebooting" the character, and making her younger. (--And no doubt sexier.) (--As usual, all that's happening here is that a Hollywood studio is taking an established franchise and changing ABSOLUTELY EVERYTHING ABOUT IT.) (--I don't know how many Miss Marple fans we might have out there . . . but if there's even a single one, and your hands aren't too arthritic to dial a phone, call and tell us if you approve of this.) "Just Go With It" Is the 12th Adam Sandler Movie to Surpass $100 Million at the Box Office: Say what you want about ADAM SANDLER movies. Because even if your words make him cry, he can cry into HUGE BAGS OF MONEY. --His latest movie, "Just Go With It", just became the 12th Adam Sandler flick to surpass the $100 million mark at the U.S. box office. --The others are "The Waterboy", "Big Daddy", "Mr. Deeds", "Anger Management", "50 First Dates", "The Longest Yard", "Click" . . . --"I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry", "You Don't Mess with the Zohan", "Bedtime Stories" and "Grown Ups". Hailee Steinfeld from "True Grit" Will Play Sleeping Beauty: 14-year-old Oscar nominee HAILEE STEINFELD of "True Grit" fame will star in a new version of "Sleeping Beauty". --This one will be told from her character's perspective. Instead of just laying there waiting to be rescued by the prince, she has to escape some kind of dangerous dream world inside her head. Rosie O'Donnell's New Talk Show Will Take Over Oprah's Old Studio: If you woke up this morning wondering where ROSIE O'DONNELL'S upcoming talk show will be taped . . . well, what a coincidence . . . we have the answer: It'll take over OPRAH WINFREY'S studio in Chicago. --Rosie made the announcement in a video blog. She said, quote, "I just wanted to say: 'Hi, I'm coming to Chicago.' Yes, I am, and I'm thrilled about it. And I get to work with all of you, who have created magnificent television for two decades-plus. --"Thank you, Oprah. And thank all you people there. Some of you are going to be sticking around and helping us make a kick-ass show for the Oprah Winfrey Network." (--You can watch the video, here.) --This isn't exactly a shocker . . . since we knew Rosie's show was going to be one of the centerpieces on OWN this fall . . . but it's notable that she'll inherit a lot of the resources from "The Oprah Winfrey Show". --Both in the studio itself, and the production staff. (--"Oprah" wraps on May 25th.) --Just in case there's any doubt about Oprah's commitment to Rosie, there's this: OWN has already ordered 130 episodes of Rosie's show. At five episodes per week, that's 26 weeks of shows . . . or six months. --There's still no name or premiere date, but Rosie has said that it'll be less celebrity-focused than her previous talk show. Instead, it sounds more like "The Oprah Winfrey Show" . . . in that it'll be about, quote, "real people and real issues." "Mad Men" Won't Be Back Until *Next* Year: It's official: "Mad Men" will not be back this summer . . . but it WILL be back. --Yesterday, AMC announced that they've signed off on a fifth season, but it won't premiere until March of next year. (--Each of the previous four seasons have run from mid-summer through October.) --AMC's prolonged contract negotiations with creator Matt Weiner caused the delay. (--According to Deadline.com, the negotiations weren't all about money, although Weiner will reportedly make $30 million over the next two years.) (--AMC wanted to add product placement into the show, cut two minutes from each episode for more commercial time, and drop two cast members to save money. Weiner objected to all that. It's unclear HOW or IF the issues were resolved.) The Season Premiere of "Dancing with the Stars" Wasn't Quite Able to Beat "American Idol": 22.7 million people tuned in to last week's season premiere of "Dancing with the Stars". But that was only good enough for 2nd place, behind Wednesday's "American Idol" performance show, which had almost 24 million viewers. (--Interestingly enough, more homes were tuned into the "Dancing" premiere, but more people per household were watching "Idol", so it wound up with more viewers.) 1.) Wednesday's "American Idol" performance show, Fox, 23.9 million viewers 2.) The 12th season premiere of "Dancing with the Stars", ABC, 22.7 million viewers 3.) Thursday's "American Idol" results show, Fox, 21.3 million viewers Wednesday TV Reminders: (--Check your local listings.) --"American Idol" [Performance Show] . . . 8:00 to 10:00 P.M. on Fox. (--Songs from the '80s are this week's theme.) --"Survivor: Redemption Island" . . . 8:00 to 9:00 P.M. on CBS. (--Stephanie fights to stay in the game by breaking Matt's winning streak as they duel on Redemption Island. He's got four successful duels under his belt so far.) --"America's Next Top Model" . . . 8:00 to 9:00 P.M. on the CW. (--Sonia Dara, who you may remember from last year's "Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue", is the guest judge when the contestants pose in mud for their photo shoot.) --"The Ultimate Fighter" [13th Season Premiere] . . . 9:00 to 10:00 P.M. on Spike TV. (--Brock Lesnar and Junior Dos Santos provide guidance for 14 welterweights vying for a six-figure UFC contract.) --"Dog the Bounty Hunter" . . . 9:00 to 10:00 P.M. on A&E. (--Dog requests the help of a fugitive's siblings in order to capture him.) --"Law & Order: Special Victims Unit" . . . 10:00 to 11:00 P.M. on NBC. (--Jeremy Irons plays a psychologist who teams up with Benson and Stabler to find the killer of a young girl. "Lost's" Elizabeth Mitchell plays her piano teacher.) --"Coal" [SERIES Premiere] . . . 10:00 to 11:00 P.M. on Spike TV. (--A new reality series from the creators of "Deadliest Catch" and "Ice Road Truckers". This one focuses on a West Virginia coal-mining operation.) --"Tyler Perry's House of Payne" [7th Season Premiere] . . . 10:00 to 10:30 P.M. on TBS. --"Top Chef: All Stars" [8th Season Finale] . . . 10:00 to 11:00 P.M. on Bravo. Britney Spears Is *Not* Touring with Enrique Iglesias: BRITNEY SPEARS announced that she'd be touring with ENRIQUE IGLESIAS during a pre-taped appearance on "Good Morning America" yesterday, but that won't be happening after all. --Enrique's rep released a statement last night saying, quote, "Unfortunately, Enrique Iglesias and Britney Spears will not be touring together. Enrique has great respect for Britney and is a longtime fan of her work. He's very sorry for the confusion this might have caused to anyone." --It's unclear what happened. There's talk that Enrique bailed because he wanted it to be a co-headlining tour, and that wasn't going to be the case. --There was also speculation that Enrique wanted more money. Britney's camp hasn't commented, and neither has tour promoter Live Nation. --According to BritneySpears.com, Britney will be on the road from June 17th in Sacramento through August 13th in Toronto. (--Check out all the dates, here.) --Britney performed three songs off her new album on "Good Morning America" . . . "Hold It Against Me", a medley of her hits with the new song "Big Fat Bass", and her single "Till the World Ends". (--You can watch the whole concert, here.) (--Personally, Britney seems out of shape and sort of listless . . . also the singing is too perfect and high-energy for the low-energy body movements, so you know what that means: Yup, she's lip-synching, as usual.) (--That's not surprising. Britney isn't exactly known for, well, performing live.) The Latest Van Halen Rumor: They're in the Mixing Stage! Since there still isn't any OFFICIAL word on VAN HALEN'S phantom new album with DAVID LEE ROTH . . . we're forced to stick with the UNOFFICIAL word. --Here's the latest: A fan site called Van Halen News Desk claims the album is "nearing completion." --They quoted "That Metal Show" host EDDIE TRUNK, who Tweeted: "On the rock gossip wire I heard two reports today from reliable sources: VH album is close to done and will come out this year. Label [to be determined]." --Of course, since Eddie attributed his comment to the "rock gossip" scene, there's also the possibility that this site is just using Eddie's Tweet to "confirm" its own Van Halen speculation. (--A possible case of rock gossip incest, if you will.) --The fan site adds, quote, "This matches up perfectly with what we heard from a trusted source at the beginning of March . . . that the recording process is going great and the band is starting to mix the new tracks. --"Also, from another reliable source of ours today, we hear that this fall is the most probable time that the album will be released and a tour will begin." The Classic Hole Lineup Reunited at a Documentary Premiere: COURTNEY LOVE and the classic HOLE lineup reunited in New York on Monday night, at a screening of a rock documentary called "Hit So Hard". It's about the life of former Hole drummer Patty SchemeL. --Aside from Courtney and Patty, this "reunion" featured guitarist ERIC ERLANDSON and bassist Melissa Auf der Maur. (--Both of whom, for the record, did not approve of Courtney releasing "Nobody's Daughter" as a "Hole" album in 2009.) --This was the first time in 13 years that the four of them got together . . . publicly, at least. They were all in Hole from 1994 to 1997, during the big "Live Through This" era. (--Here's a picture of them together.) --So does this mean there could be a reunion on the horizon? Maybe. Melissa and Patty said that it hasn't really been discussed, but they could be down. --And here's what Courtney said: Quote, "I do want to say that if something's not relevant, I don't want to do it. As much [as] I love Patty, and I would play with her in five seconds, but if it's not moving forward, I don't want to do it. That's just my thing. --"If it's not miserable, and it's going forward, and I'm happy with it, that's all I have to say about that." (--In other words, she's not resuscitating the mid-'90s Hole just to go around playing "Live Through This" on tour.) WEDNESDAY'S SHOWBIZ EXTRAS There's supposedly a video going around that depicts "Dancing With the Stars" contestant CHELSEA KANE snorting cocaine. But the faces in the video are pixilated, and Chelsea says it's NOT her. (Full Story) GEORGE CLOONEY is on the list of potential witnesses in the prostitution trial of Italian Prime Minister SILVIO BERLUSCONI. But apparently only because he and his girlfriend attended one of Berlusconi's parties. (Full Story) Bisexual actor FARLEY GRANGER . . . who starred in the Alfred Hitchcock films "Rope" and "Strangers on a Train" . . . has died at the age of 85. (Full Story) Colorado Rockies first baseman JASON GIAMBI testified at the BARRY BONDS trial yesterday that he also received performance-enhancing drugs from Barry's trainer. (Full Story) THE GAY AVENGER . . . champion of the Premier Gay Wrestling federation . . . is upset that WWE announcer MICHAEL COLE wasn't fired for using a gay slur on Twitter. (Full Story) There might be some risqué pictures of CHRISTINA AGUILERA out there, after someone found a memory card from her camera in a French hotel room. But it doesn't sound like there's anything too incriminating. (Full Story) Pixar's new "Monsters Inc." movie will be a PREQUEL called "Monster University". (Full Story) KOURTNEY KARDASHIAN made her soap opera debut on "One Life to Life" on Monday. She played personal injury attorney Kassandra Kavanaugh, "with two Ks." (Video) The NBC charity special featuring former Presidents George H.W. Bush and BILL CLINTON bombed in the ratings on Monday night. It only drew 4.2 million viewers. In retrospect, you can kinda see how the concept wasn't exactly a guaranteed ratings bonanza. (Full Story) NAZZY’S RANDOM STUFF A 10-Year-Old and His Seven-Year-Old Sister Save Their Babysitter's Life: Yesterday, police in Darien, Connecticut released a 911 call from January and it's pretty incredible. --Back on January 26th, 7-year-old Nina Stoop and her brother, 10-year-old Tucker Stoop, were home alone with their babysitter, Nadia Maldonado. Suddenly, Nadia, the babysitter, stopped breathing. --Nina knew something was wrong so she got her older brother. And he called 911. --Through the two-minute call it's clear that he's scared but he keeps INCREDIBLE composure . . . answers the dispatcher's questions . . . and even calls him "sir" before he asks if he can call his dad. --The kids were right . . . Nadia was suffering from respiratory distress. If Tucker hadn't called 911, doctors say she probably would've died. --The police department in Darien is holding a special ceremony tomorrow to give lifesaving awards to Tucker and Nina. (Darien Patch) When You Get Dumped, It Triggers the Same Part of the Brain as Getting Punched In the Face: According to a new study, when you get dumped, it triggers a special area of your brain. And no, despite the evidence to the contrary, it's not the area of your brain that suddenly makes you want to listen to AIR SUPPLY. --Researchers at the University of Michigan have found that getting dumped triggers the same part of the brain as getting PUNCHED IN THE FACE. --The region of the brain that responds to physical pain overlaps with the region that responds to social rejection. So when you feel severe physical pain or severe emotional pain, your brain interprets them the same way. --Ethan Kross is a psychology professor who led the study. He says, quote, "These results give new meaning to the idea that rejection 'hurts.' It's not [just] a metaphor." (Yahoo News) The Age When the Average Woman Officially Turns Into Her Mother Is . . . 32: As a woman, no matter how much you think it'll NEVER happen to you . . . one day you're going to wake up and realize you've turned into your MOTHER. A new survey has tried to pinpoint exactly WHEN that's going to happen. --In the survey by Hallmark, the average woman says she turned into her mother at age . . . 32. --The most common sign that you've become your mother is that you find yourself WORRYING MORE. The other common signs are stocking up on groceries, going to bed early, being more outspoken, and watching soap operas. --Two out of five women say they've also found themselves talking to their children with phrases that their mother used with them. -25% of women say they've accepted that they've turned into their mother. 15% say they're actually HAPPY about it . . . 17% are miserable about it and say they will keep on fighting it until the day they die. --One more finding from the study: One-third of MEN also say that THEY'VE turned into their mothers. (PR Newswire) Need a Fake Reference For a Job or Apartment Search? Check Out This Completely Shady Website: This seems incredibly risky to me . . . like, if you get caught, you're SCREWED . . . but if you're desperate enough or sketchy enough, it might appeal to you. --It's a website called CareerExcuse.com and they'll provide you with a FAKE REFERENCE for a job or apartment search. You get an 800 number to a fake company, the HR rep or landlord can call, and they'll give you a glowing reference. --Their packages start at $85 and go up from there. For more money you can get a unique 800 number, pick the name of their fake company, and make sure a live receptionist answers the call. (CareerExcuse.com) People Who Cheat On Their Taxes are Also More Likely To Steal From Their Kid's Piggy Bank: This seems fairly obvious, and now it's official . . . if you're the kind of person who makes up tons of lies when you're doing your taxes, you're probably the kind of person who has trouble being moral in other aspects of life, too. --A new survey by DDB Worldwide Communications Group tried to figure out the profile of the average tax cheat. Here's what they found. --The tax cheat is probably a man. 64% of the people who admit to cheating on their taxes are male. --He's probably younger. 55% are under age 45. --He has a grotesque sense of entitlement. Tax cheats were FAR more likely than non-cheats to agree with the statements "I'm an overall better person" than the average person and "I'm special and deserve to be treated that way." --He doesn't show ethics anywhere. Tax cheats are more likely to keep the extra money if a cashier gives them the wrong change . . . pretend a friend is a former boss for a reference check . . . and keep a $20 bill they SEE someone drop. --He'd even steal from his kids. 28% of tax cheats say they'd steal money from their kid's piggy bank, versus 3% of non-cheats. --He's probably living paycheck to paycheck. 42% of tax cheats say they're one paycheck away from DISASTER, versus 29% of non-tax cheats. (Yahoo News) These High Gas Prices Could Save Tens of Thousands of Lives and Tens of Billions of Dollars in Healthcare: And now, it's time for us to do the requisite story about how high gas prices aren't 100% bad news. So remember what we're about to say when you're paying $5.50 a gallon in July. --High gas prices save lives. For every $1 rise in gas prices, approximately 11,000 American lives are saved. That's a combo of fewer car accidents and more people getting healthy by walking. --High gas prices save money . . . just not your money. Every $1 rise in gas prices saves $11 BILLION in healthcare costs per year. That's because the $1 increase can lead to a 10% drop in obesity rates. --High gas prices lead to better roads. Higher gas prices bring in higher taxes, which many states put into improving their roads and other forms of transportation. --High gas prices lead to cleaner air. Fewer cars on the road equals fewer emissions. --High gas prices help hobos. When gas prices went up a few years ago, people started taking trains again, since they're cheap and efficient. And who loves trains? Hobos who ride the rails. This is big for them. Oh, and Amtrak too, I guess. (Atlanta Journal-Constitution) MEATBALL CRIMINALS In Utah, a Man Tries To Save His House By Lighting His Car On Fire . . . and Ends Up In Jail: Last July, John Maxim of Salt Lake City, Utah was about to lose his house, so he came up with a scheme. --He needed to raise $15,000 to keep the bank from foreclosing, so he went online and announced that if people donated the money, he would set his 1993 Ford Escort ON FIRE. And everyone who donated could watch a video of the fire. --His theory? Quote, "I figure in a country where OPRAH can just give people cars [and] Lehman Brothers can get bailed out by our government . . . perhaps there are enough people out there who'd pay to see some desperate sap light his car on fire." --And he was right. Over the course of four days, 387 people donated more than enough for him to keep his house. --John held up his end of the bargain, too. He went to a campground and, in the middle of the night, he set his car on fire. --There was only one problem. That campground was at Lone Rock in Toole County, Utah . . . which is federal land. You can't set big fires there. And the Bureau of Land Management investigated John . . . and had him arrested. --Last week he pled guilty to creating a hazard and starting a fire other than a campfire . . . and paid $3,413 in fines. --Apparently he had the money and didn't need to come up with another scheme to raise the money to pay the fines that resulted from his first scheme. (Jalopnik) A Woman Who's Facing Prison Time For Forged Prescriptions Tries To Delay Her Sentencing With . . . a Forged Doctor's Note: When you're clearly HORRIBLE at forgeries . . . but you just keep on forging . . . eventually, THIS is going to happen to you. --Back in January, 41-year-old Michelle Elaine Astumian of San Luis Obispo, California was convicted for forging drug prescriptions AND paying for those prescriptions using a forged check. --She was looking at almost five years in prison at her sentencing. And she was due to be sentenced on Monday. --So Michelle showed up to the sentencing and asked the judge to delay it. And she even gave him a doctor's note showing that, for health reasons, she couldn't go to prison right now. --Well, as you might have guessed . . . YES, that doctor's note was ALSO forged. --As soon as she pulled it out, the prosecutor called the doctor on the note, who told him it was a forgery. --That's when Michelle collapsed onto the floor of the courtroom. She was taken to a hospital to be checked out . . . so her sentencing WILL be delayed a few extra days. She's also looking at a new forgery charge now. (San Francisco Chronicle) RANDOM NEWS EXTRAS More bad news for rich people. Can they ever get a break? A new survey finds they are twice as likely to hate flying than the rest of us. (Full story) We've seen services like this before, but this one's new. It's called Cloud Girlfriend and they'll set up a Facebook page for a fake girlfriend for you so you can change your status to "In a Relationship". (Full story) Using GPS data, a company has calculated the worst commutes in the country. Congratulations, Riverside, California . . . you've got the worst freeway of all. (Full story) Haven't the Japanese quake victims suffered enough? Now it's gotten even worse . . . Crocs has donated 100,000 pairs of horrible shoes to them. (Full story) People can hide drugs in ANYTHING. A jail in New Jersey caught people smuggling drugs to prisoners by melting them down and using them to color in Disney coloring books. (Full story) Volkswagen is recalling about 71,000 Jettas because of a wiring problem that can make the car shut off when you honk the horn. (Full story) The Five Worst Reasons to Have a Baby: There are a lot of good reasons to have kids. But the website Babble.com decided to be a little more pessimistic about it. Here are the five WORST reasons to have a baby. #1.) Because You Want Unconditional Love. Sure, your kid will probably love you, but it'll also cry, throw tantrums, and need constant attention. So if you just want something to love you unconditionally, try a puppy first. #2.) Because You Think It'll Save Your Marriage. It might work in the short term, but if you're already having problems, there's a good chance that having a baby will just put even MORE strain on your relationship, especially as the child gets older. --And if you eventually decide to get a divorce, it'll make things much more complicated and painful. #3.) Because You're Sick of Your Parents Nagging You About It. Remember, they won't be the ones doing all the work and dealing with the added stress. -And if you're not ready for a baby yet, taking care of one will be much more annoying than dealing with your mom's nagging. #4.) Because Your Brother or Sister Had a Kid, and Now They Get All the Attention. First of all, there's no guarantee that having a baby will change anything, because your parents might end up favoring the first-born grandchild no matter what. --Plus, having a baby is irreversible. So sibling rivalry should have NOTHING to do with your decision. #5.) You Think Having a Baby Will Make You Less Selfish. If you'd describe yourself as somewhat self-centered, then having a kid might not change you. It might just make you unhappy. --That's not to say that having a baby won't change your priorities AT ALL. But you shouldn't have a kid just to fix something about yourself. (Babble.com) Hot Jobs Map eBay Classifieds has created a cool hot jobs map of America that shows which states in the U.S. are the best to find employment. Reports show that 190,000 new jobs were created in February, and eBay Classifieds show where they are. eBay Classifieds looked at personal income per capita, unemployment rates, and crime rates in each state to determine which states have the most buoyant economies in this still difficult economic climate. Then they researched the largest and fastest-growing occupations in each state to come up with their map. Here’s some of what they found: New Hampshire: New Hampshire has the lowest crime rates in the country, the 4th lowest unemployment rates, and the 9th highest personal income per capita, making it the most economically buoyant state in the country. New York: New York City’s median salary, $64,535, is lower than 10 other states’ highest median salaries. Connecticut: Connecticut has the highest personal income per capita in the country, at $56,556. Maryland: Fans of The Wire will be unsurprised to learn that although parts of Maryland are very wealthy, the state has the 7th highest crime rates in the country. Rhode Island: Rhode Island has the 15th highest personal income per capita figures, as well as 18th lowest crime rates, but its high unemployment figures (46th) keep it in the middle of the pack. California: Sunnyvale has the highest median salary of all the states’ highest paying cities, but California’s high unemployment rates (12.9%, or 3.1% higher than the national average) means it’s not as economically buoyant overall as other states. South Carolina: South Carolina has the fifth highest unemployment rates, the third highest crime rates, and the fourth lowest per capita income. Still, its city with the highest median income, Aiken, has a higher median income than 18 other states’. To see the map click on http://blog.ebayclassifieds.com/2011/03/17/state-of-jobs.

HOLLYWOOD DIRT OVERFLOW (03-28-11)

SHOWBIZ SEX Reese Witherspoon Got Married Saturday Night: REESE WITHERSPOON got married at her estate in Ojai, California on Saturday night. Her new husband is showbiz agent Jim Toth. He's 40 . . . Reese is 35. Reese and Jim started dating in January of 2010. They got engaged in December. --This was probably one of the most star-studded weddings in quite some time. Guests included Renee Zellweger, Tobey Maguire, Robert Downey Jr., Alyssa Milano, plus Sean Penn and Scarlett Johansson. (--Who are still not officially a couple, of course.) --11-year-old Ava and 7-year-old Deacon . . . Reese's kids with first husband RYAN PHILLIPPE . . . were there, too. --Part of Reese's pre-wedding prep included apologizing in advance to her neighbors for the chaos that was about to ensue. --A source says, quote, "Reese sent nice personalized letters to all the neighbors last week. --"She informed us that she and Jim were having their wedding at her home and apologized ahead of time for all the construction and all the cargo trucks that would be coming in and out of the community." Mariah Carey Had Contractions This Weekend . . . But It Was a False Alarm: MARIAH CAREY was rushed to the hospital late Saturday night after she started having contractions. But it was just a false alarm. --On Sunday . . . which was Mariah's 42nd birthday . . . she Tweeted, quote, "So #dembabies really wanted 2 celebrate w/us/share the anniversary! I started having contractions last night…went 2 the hospital." --After doctors got everything under control and sent her home, she added, quote, "They almost came on 3/27- happy anniversary in deed!!! We have a few more weeks 2 go but- wow!!!: )" --As usual, if you're confused by what Mariah is saying, it just means you're normal. Yesterday was NOT Mariah and NICK CANNON'S anniversary. That's April 30th. --So it appears that calling her birthday an anniversary is just another one of those weird, inexplicable and vaguely self-centered things Mariah does. Matt Damon Says Kissing Michael Douglas Will Be Like Transitively Kissing Catherine Zeta-Jones: You know the old saying, "When you sleep with someone, you're having sex with everyone THEY'VE had sex with", right? Well, apparently that works with KISSING, too. --MATT DAMON will be sucking face with MICHAEL DOUGLAS in the upcoming LIBERACE movie. (--Michael plays Liberace . . . Matt plays his gay lover.) --And as far as Matt is concerned, that just means he gets to kiss CATHERINE ZETA-JONES, too. --He says, quote, "I kind of think of it in algebra terms, back to my high-school days. It's like the transitive property . . . by kissing Michael Douglas, I am making out with Catherine." --Matt and Catherine appeared in "Ocean's Twelve" together, but he didn't get a shot at her. --He says, quote, "I was actually kind of upset that I never got to kiss Catherine, but now I get to kiss Michael. I thought it would have been better if I could have at least kissed them both." Is Lindsay Lohan Dropping the "Lohan" From Her Name . . . and Just Going By "Lindsay" From Now On? LINDSAY LOHAN has decided that she doesn't want her father's name anymore. And neither does her mother or her little sister. --DINA LOHAN says, quote, "Lindsay is dropping the Lohan and just going by Lindsay. Plus, me and [younger daughter] Ali will be officially changing our last names back to my maiden name, Sullivan." --A source adds, quote, "So many of the greatest people in showbiz are known by just their first name. Look at Oprah and Beyoncé. Now you can add Lindsay to that list. --"And it's a way for them all to start over. No one in the family want anything to do with Lindsay's father anymore and that includes sharing a last name." --How does Lindsay's dad, MICHAEL LOHAN, feel about all this? He's not a fan of the idea, but ultimately, he doesn't think it's happening. --He says, quote, "At the outset, it hurts to hear something like that, but at the end of the day, it's never going to happen. It's a real shame Dina would make up this kind of story. --"From the time she came out to California, she's tried to put a wedge between Lindsay and me. Every time she comes around, she tries to put a wedge, and it's only harmful to Lindsay and the children. This family needs therapy." --Michael . . . who was arrested last week for allegedly assaulting his ex-fiancée . . . says, quote, "I'm proud of the Lohan name. It's a name of integrity. --"We all had very successful jobs on Wall Street. My father was an unbelievable provider. My sisters are pillars of the community. There's not a blemish in my family outside of me." The Window Chris Brown Broke Cost More than $2,000 to Replace: The window that CHRIS BROWN broke backstage at "Good Morning America" last week cost $2,055.36 to replace. --That's $583.26 for the glass, and $1,472.10 for labor. (--It took three guys five hours to do it. Sounds like a union job to me.) A company called Philip Kaplan Glass Works did the job. --RadarOnline.com says Chris offered to pay for the window, but ABC turned him down. (--Talk about being an enabler. They refuse to prosecute or even make him pay for the damage he caused. Why? Because they want him back for an EXCLUSIVE, no doubt.) (--See Chris Brown's first interview since breaking a window. ONLY ON "20/20"!) (???) (--There are even sources that claim ABC is trying to take this to another level by orchestrating the first sit-down co-interview between Chris and RIHANNA. Yeah, no exploitation going on there.) --In related news, Chris Brown's publicist Tammy Brook resigned late last week. But it supposedly had nothing to do with his tantrum. --She claims she was hired to do publicity for him in the run-up to the release of his new album . . . which came out last Tuesday. Celebrity Ghost Stories - #1: A Ghost Once Popped Out of Demi Lovato's Closet: This just in: DEMI LOVATO believes in ghosts . . . because she's seen one up close. Some paparazzi moron decided to ask Demi about the ghost that supposedly haunts the "American Idol" mansion. --But Demi countered with a ghost story of her own. She said, quote, "I've seen a ghost before. It was creepy, it was in my closet when I was, like, eight and it scared me to death. --"It just, it popped out." (--Check out the video here.) Celebrity Ghost Stories - #2: Ben Stiller Has Lived in Two Haunted Houses: BEN STILLER and his wife CHRISTINE TAYLOR recently moved to New York City so he could do a Broadway play. And Ben is worried that their new digs may be HAUNTED. --He says, quote, "I have a little thing with quietness and spirits. I'm aware of ghosts. I sort of believe in ghosts, and my wife doesn't; she's afraid of axe murders." --The reason Ben is "aware" of ghosts is because he's already lived in TWO haunted houses. --He says, quote, "We rented a house in Los Angeles a few years ago, that something had gone on in, because the caretaker of the house was a little bit loopy. --"She had called to check on us a few days in and she said, 'How's it going? Have you had any experiences?' --"And I said 'No', and she goes 'Well . . . when I stayed there every morning I woke up at 4:43 A.M. for three weeks straight. And I got buzzed on the intercom a few times and I heard a few doors slam. --"And then one morning at about 4:48 in the morning I heard a party going on downstairs, a full on party with Charleston music playing and people mingling." --And his parents, JERRY STILLER and ANNE MEARA, once rented a place in Nantucket that was supposedly haunted by a baby named Stanley Benjamin. (???) (--Despite being "aware" of ghosts and being in their presence on several occasions, Ben says he's never actually seen one.) Is Bobbi Kristina Brown Getting Her Own Reality Show? BOBBI KRISTINA BROWN may follow in her parents' footsteps by getting her own REALITY SHOW. Just the other day, she Tweeted that she was taking meetings about getting a show. --And she added, quote, "The world needs 2know me 4who I REALLY am. U all will get 2 see my every day living, walk with me thro startin my career..EVERYTHING." --She added, quote, "I would only want to do this reality show so THEWORLD can know me for me. The GODfearing young, classy. outgoing, silly, REAL women iAM." --However . . . a rep for WHITNEY HOUSTON says Bobbi is NOT doing a reality show. A Movie Is Being Made About the Oldest Cheerleader in the NFL: Quick quiz: How old do you think the oldest cheerleader in the NFL is? 26? 30? 36? Wrong, wrong and wrong. --She's 42! --Her name is LAURA VIKMANIS, and she cheers for the Cincinnati Bengals. And New Line Cinema is doing a movie about her. --Laura decided to try out for the team at the age of 39 . . . after her husband left her for a younger woman. --She didn't make it, so she kept working out . . . and she made it the following year, when she was 40. A Ballerina Has Come Forward to Claim That She Did Most of Natalie Portman's Dancing in "Black Swan": The ballerina who worked as NATALIE PORTMAN'S double on "Black Swan" claims that she did the vast majority of the dancing. --27-year-old Sarah Lane was hired to perform many of the more difficult ballet moves . . . and Natalie's face was digitally grafted onto her body. But she claims there's a COVER-UP as to how much more of the dancing she did. --She says, quote, "Of the full body shots, I would say 5% are Natalie. All the other shots are me." --She also says she was told by producers not to talk about how much of the dancing she did. -She said, quote, "They wanted to create this idea in people's minds that Natalie was some kind of prodigy or so gifted in dance and really worked so hard to make herself a ballerina in a year and a half for the movie, basically because of the Oscar. -"It is demeaning to the profession and not just to me. I've been doing this for 22 years . . . Can you become a concert pianist in a year and a half, even if you're a movie star?" (--Natalie DID win the Oscar for Best Actress this year.) --In a "Los Angeles Times" article last week, "Black Swan" choreographer Benjamin Millepied said Natalie did 85% of the work. --Of course, he's probably a little biased, since Natalie is currently carrying his baby and wearing an engagement ring he bought her. --Lane says she's not coming forward out of jealousy . . . she just wants her work to be recognized. She says, quote, "Natalie] is an amazing actress, for sure. I know that it's not a personal thing against me. --"I know that it's just a political thing. It's just unfortunate that I kind of lost credit." --But Fox Searchlight . . . the studio that made the movie . . . is denying her claim. Here's their statement . . . quote, "We were fortunate to have Sarah there to cover the more complicated dance sequences and we have nothing but praise for the hard work she did. --"However, Natalie herself did most of the dancing featured in the final film." Amy Adams Will Play Lois Lane in the New Superman Movie . . . and Viggo Mortensen Might Join the Cast, Too: AMY ADAMS has been cast as Lois Lane in the new Superman movie, "Superman: Man of Steel". --Meanwhile, it's looking more and more like VIGGO MORTENSEN will jump in to play the villain General Zod. As of now, negotiations for Viggo to play the Huntsman in "Snow White and the Huntsman" have broken down. --HENRY CAVILL from the Showtime series "The Tudors" is playing Clark Kent (slash) Superman. KEVIN COSTNER and DIANE LANE are playing his "Earth parents", John and Martha Kent. --It's being directed by ZACK SNYDER, who also did "Watchmen", "300" and "Sucker Punch" . . . which debuted this weekend at #2 at the box office with $19 million. (--It lost out to the sequel to "Diary of a Wimpy Kid". Maybe that's not such a good omen.) (--But it's being produced by Christopher Nolan and written by David Goyer . . . two of the main guys behind "Batman Begins", "The Dark Knight" and the upcoming third installment, "The Dark Knight Rises".) "Diary of a Wimpy Kid" Beat "Sucker Punch" at the Box Office: "Sucker Punch" is loaded with special effects and cost over $80 million to make, but it's still got a way to go before it breaks even at the box office. It just debuted at #2 after earning $19 million. --The #1 movie was "Diary of a Wimpy Kid: Rodrick Rules". It only cost $21 million to make and the Wimpy Kid sequel has already turned a profit, by opening with $24.4 million in its first weekend. 1.) (NEW) "Diary of a Wimpy Kid: Rodrick Rules", $24.4 million. 2.) (NEW) "Sucker Punch", $19 million. 3.) Bradley Cooper's "Limitless", $15.2 million. Up to $41.3 million in its 2nd week. Casey Abrams Took His Near-Elimination So Hard That He *Collapsed*: CASEY ABRAMS took his near-elimination from "American Idol" pretty hard. --America voted Casey OUT last week, but the judges decided to use their "save" to keep him around. Casey nearly collapsed on-stage when he was told that he'd be given another shot. (--You can watch the video, here.) --But according to TMZ, Casey DID collapse backstage after the show. They say he was, quote, "so overwrought with emotion [that] he began hyperventilating and then fell to the floor in the hallway." (!!!) --"Idol" staff members helped him to a chair . . . and were able to get him to relax. --Supposedly, Casey said, quote, "I feel really bad that other [contestants] might have to go home now because [the judges] used the [one] save on me." --This would seem like an exaggerated account if it were anyone besides Casey. In addition to his extremely emotional reaction on-camera, Casey also had yet another blood transfusion before Thursday's show. --We've heard that Casey has ulcerative colitis . . . an inflammatory bowel disease, which causes cramping, abdominal pain and internal bleeding. George Lopez Is Sorry for Calling Kirstie Alley a Pig, and She Accepted the Apology . . . Eventually: GEORGE LOPEZ has apologized for calling KIRSTIE ALLEY a PIG on "Lopez Tonight" last week. He Tweeted, quote, "I misjudged the joke. No malice was intended, and I apologize to Kirstie." --But Kirstie wasn't in a forgiving mood at first. After initially responding to the joke by insinuating that George had a DRINKING PROBLEM, she continued her attack on Twitter. --She said, quote, "@GeorgeLopez I don't need or want ur apology. I want your kidney dude . . . on behalf of ur [ex] and all the women you've insulted, give it back." --After that, George told "Access Hollywood", quote, "I wish that she had [accepted the apology] and that she would be guest on 'Lopez Tonight'. I'd love to have her on. --"She has a lot of fans . . . and when you make a joke of that type, um, it never goes over well." He also poked fun at his own weight issues . . . saying, quote, "I blame my Spanx for cutting off my circulation to my brain, and that's all I'll say about that." --Kirstie hasn't said whether or not she'd take him up on that offer, but she did cave in and accept his apology. She Tweeted, quote, "Take life as lightly as u can and then move on. Even u George . . . u are forgiven." --She added, quote, "In fairness . . . Mr. Lopez sent me a HUGE slew of flowers today. I formally accept your flowers and your regards . . . here's your kidney back. :)" Highlights from the First Annual Comedy Awards: The first-ever Comedy Awards was taped over the weekend. It'll air April 10th on several cable networks, including Comedy Central and TV Land. But if you'd rather not wait to find out what happened, here's a rundown of some of the results: --"Modern Family" won best comedy series, "The Daily Show with Jon Stewart" was named the best late-night comedy show, and "The Other Guys" won the award for best comedy movie. (--It stars WILL FERRELL and MARK WAHLBERG.) --"Toy Story 3" won best animated comedy movie, and "South Park" won best animated comedy series. --Tina Fey and Zach Galifianakis took home awards for "Date Night" and "Dinner for Schmucks", respectively. Alec Baldwin won best TV actor, and Kristen Wiig was the top TV actress. --DAVID LETTERMAN was presented with something called "The Johnny Carson Award for Comedic Excellence" . . . and as expected, EDDIE MURPHY was honored with the "Comedy Icon" award. --The fans got to vote for the best original "viral" video of the year . . . and perhaps not surprisingly, the "Bed Intruder Song" by Auto-Tune the News came out on top. Monday TV Reminders: (--Check your local listings.) --"Dancing with the Stars" [Performance Show] . . . 8:00 to 10:00 P.M. on ABC. --"All Together Now: A Celebration of Service" . . . 8:00 to 9:00 P.M. on NBC. (--President Barack Obama and former presidents George W. Bush, Bill Clinton, George H.W. Bush and Jimmy Carter salute American service and volunteerism.) --"The Secret Life of the American Teenager" [3rd Season Premiere] . . . 8:00 to 9:00 P.M. on ABC Family. (--Beverley Mitchell, who played Lucy Camden on "7th Heaven", guest stars as a guidance counselor.) --"Make It or Break It" [2nd Season Premiere] . . . 9:00 to 10:00 P.M. on ABC Family. --"All Worked Up" [3rd Season Finale] . . . 9:00 to 10:00 P.M. on TruTV. --"RuPaul's Drag Race" . . . 10:00 to 11:00 P.M. on Logo. (--Wayne Brady and Fantasia Barrino guest judge a fantasy hair show.) --"19 Kids & Counting" [5th Season Finale] . . . 10:00 to 10:30 P.M. on TLC. --"Heavy" [1st Season Finale] . . . 10:00 to 11:00 P.M. on A&E. Bret Michaels Is Suing the Tony Awards for Almost Killing Him: POISON singer BRET MICHAELS is suing the Tony Awards for the incident that happened during the 2009 ceremony, when he was hit in the head by a set piece that was being lowered from the ceiling. (--Here's video.) --Bret was hospitalized for a broken nose and a cut lip, but that's not why he's suing. In the lawsuit, Bret alleges that the accident played a significant role in the near-fatal brain hemorrhage he suffered last year, 10 months after the Tonys. --The suit says, quote, "One of the most common causes of this type of hemorrhage is head trauma, exactly like the one [Bret] suffered at the hands of the Tony Awards." --He says he was not instructed on how to safely leave the stage, and wasn't even aware that anything would be coming down from the ceiling. The producers have said Bret, quote, "missed his mark." --Bret's lawyer says, quote, "[They] dropped a piece of the stage on Bret's head, and then instead of doing the right thing, joked about it and played it off for ratings. --"Bret never wanted to file a lawsuit, but the Tony Awards have left us with no choice. They must be held accountable for almost killing Bret, and that is what we are going to do." --He's suing for negligence, civil battery, negligent misrepresentation and negligent interference with prospective economic advantage. There's no word how much he's asking for. No one from the Tonys has commented. Lady Gaga Has Recorded a "Country Road Version" of "Born This Way": LADY GAGA has released a new version of "Born This Way". She describes it as "the country road version." (--You can listen to it, here.) --It includes one new verse: Quote, "If we want to make it country, baby, it's okay / 'cause I was born, I was born, I was born this way / from London, Paris, Japan, back to U.S.A. / I was born on the road, I was born to be brave." Rebecca Black Is Drawing Interest from Record Labels: Whether you like it or not, 13-year-old "Friday" superstar REBECCA BLACK is launching a music career. She has a manager now, and his team has built a website for her at RebeccaBlackOnline.com. --It already has a bio, photos, and videos . . . featuring clips of her "Tonight Show" appearance . . . and of course, that flawless "Friday" video itself. (--Which now has over 59 million views, by the way.) But that's not all. --Supposedly, Rebecca is drawing interest from major record labels. (???) Her manager says, quote, "Record labels have been contacting [us] about Rebecca. There is definitely interest from real record labels. They've found out she can sing. --"With all this exposure, we're looking at her coming out with more songs and an album. We've been getting submissions from a lot of fantastic songwriters. That's a good sign." (--And now, for the BAD sign . . .) Duff McKagan Becomes "Road Gay" While on Tour: Former GUNS N' ROSES bassist DUFF MCKAGAN says he becomes "road gay" while on tour. He explains, quote, "You're away from your wife and whatever, and I don't (eff) around . . . but there are no women on the bus. --"All of a sudden, well, your bass player's got long black hair, he's wearing his little sister's pants, and out of the corner of your eye he looks like a hot chick. We call it 'road gay.' We don't actually act on it." Best Buy Is Trying to Unload "Chinese Democracy for $1.99: Best Buy was the exclusive retailer of GUNS N' ROSES' "Chinese Democracy" when it came out in November of 2008 . . . and that privilege did NOT come cheap. --Best Buy bought 1.6 million copies of the album for around $14 million. But, the album bombed . . . and according to Nielsen Soundscan, it's only sold 614,000 copies in the U.S. so far. --It's unclear if Best Buy's massive, bulk purchase was a condition of the exclusivity deal . . . or if they just decided to stock up because they thought it would sell. But either way, they still have a lot of discs to unload. --And that's exactly what they're trying to do. --Right now . . . (--or at least as of late last night) . . . you could buy a "Chinese Democracy" album off BestBuy.com for $1.99. The original price is listed as $13.99, so that's almost 90% off. (--To purchase your copy, hit up this link.) MONDAY'S SHOWBIZ EXTRAS - 1 of 2 MEGAN FOX stripped down to her underwear for another Armani ad. (Pictures and video here) New York Giants quarterback ELI MANNING and his wife welcomed a baby girl last week. (Full Story) A guy who claimed he had a "date" with MILEY CYRUS was arrested for trespassing . . . on her NEIGHBOR'S property. (Full Story) GERALDINE FERRARO . . . the first female vice-presidential candidate for a major party . . . died Saturday after a long battle with cancer. She was 75. (Full Story) WILL SASSO from "Mad TV" and "(Bleep) My Dad Says" has been cast as Curly in that "Three Stooges" movie. There are now rumors that HANK AZARIA might play Moe, and JAMES MARSDEN could play Larry. (Full Story) JAMES CAMERON was helping to develop a 3D camera for the new Mars rover. But the project has been scrapped, because there was no time to finish it before the next launch. (Full Story) The WWE already had to apologize for some homophobic stuff JOHN CENA said. Now they're apologizing for a homophobic slur used by "Monday Night Raw" announcer MICHAEL COLE on Twitter. (Full Story) The last episode of "Oprah" will air on May 25th. There's no word on who will be her final guest. (Full Story) Looking forward to seeing WILL FERRELL on "The Office"? A brief preview clip is online. (Video) TOM HANKS says he'll guest star on a future episode of "30 Rock", but that's all we know for now. (Full Story) First, there was talk that JUSTIN BIEBER was getting a "prank" show like ASHTON KUTCHER'S "Punk'd" . . . and now the word is that his girlfriend, SELENA GOMEZ, is getting HER own prank show. (Full Story) MOTLEY CRUE singer VINCE NEIL supposedly threatened his ex-girlfriend in Las Vegas last Thursday night. According to reports, he even had to be restrained by the Hilton hotel security. However, he was NOT arrested. (Full Story) The charity album "Songs for Japan" has hit iTunes. It's a double-CD with 38 songs. (--You can find the track-list by scrolling down, here.) TONY BENNETT will record a duet with . . . AMY WINEHOUSE. It'll be on his upcoming album, "Tony Bennett: Duets 2", which is the follow-up to an album of duets that he put out in 2006. (Full Story) Did you know they still released singles on CD? Well, they do. Or, in the case of Mercury Records, they DID. Mercury will stop releasing most of their singles on CD . . . and vinyl, too. From now on, they'll be digital-only releases. (Full Story) NAZZY’S RANDOM STUFF Men Start Feeling Old At 58, Women Start Feeling Old At . . . 29: People always tend to make a big deal over turning 30, but really, it's not that bad. And it certainly doesn't mean that your life is over. --As long as you're a man, that is. If you're a woman, then, yeah, you're done. --According to a new study, the average man doesn't start feeling OLD until he hits age 58. The average woman starts feeling old at . . . age 29. --That means it literally takes TWICE as long for men to feel old. --The most common thing that made women start to feel old was finding gray hairs or SAGGING body parts. The most common thing that made men start to feel old was when they couldn't perform in bed. --The second-most common thing that made men start to feel old? When they start thinking that music is being played too loud in bars. --Cary Cooper is a psychology professor at Lancaster University in England. He says, quote, "Magazines are filled with young, attractive women. Women start to perceive themselves as old when they no longer feel . . . trendy or fashionable. --"Men, on the other hand, don't have to be good looking, it doesn't concern them. At 30, women have matured, they're expected to think about getting married and starting a family. --"The majority of men are much more career oriented . . . they don't feel old until they've reached retirement age." (Daily Mail) 85% of Women Say They've Flirted To Get a Discount In the Past Month: Hey, every study may show that women make less money than men . . . but, in the male gender's defense, we NEED that extra money because we don't have the supple, perky breasts that are necessary to get a bunch of discounts. --According to a new survey, 85% of women say they've FLIRTED to get a discount . . . and that's just in the past month. --The most common techniques are hair tossing, eye contact, giggling, and being overly friendly. The most common places to flirt for discounts are bars, electronics stores and gyms. --And . . . the flirting works. --The average woman surveyed saves $240 every year, or an average of $20 a month, by flirting. --And 56% say they've gotten things completely free just by flirting. --When the flirting doesn't work and they have to pay full price, more than two out of three women say they get VERY embarrassed . . . and 92% will actually leave and go shop around. --The survey also found the top 10 things that people of both genders REFUSE to buy without a discount. In order, they are: Car, vacation, TV, house, clothes, phone, furniture, computer, camera, and cable subscription. (PR Newswire) A High School Secretary's Porno Career is Exposed When a Student Recognizes Her . . . and Asks For Her Autograph: Man, the Internet just keeps making it harder and harder for porno skanks to try to go legit. --The latest one to go down is Samantha Ardente of Quebec City, Canada. She was working as a secretary at Etchemins High School . . . and moonlighting in PORNOS. --Samantha Ardente is the name she uses in her porno career. Her real name wasn't released, so that if she does try to go legit again, she might have a shot. --Her cover was blown when a 14-year-old boy at the school saw her in a porno . . . recognized her . . . then came in the next day and asked for her AUTOGRAPH. --That boy also posted a photo of Samantha in her underwear, from a porno, on a Facebook page. That got him suspended from school indefinitely. --Samantha was also suspended while the school decides whether or not to fire her. --Only one porno featuring Samantha has been released. It's called "Serial Abusers 2". (Canoe) A Marriage Counselor is Suspended For Having Sex With a Woman Whose Marriage He Was Supposed To Be Saving: Yeah . . . this sounds like JUST about the worst marriage counselor ever. --Jason Butler is a marriage counselor and social worker in Greenland, New Hampshire. And he's just been suspended for THE biggest possible marriage counselor ethics violation there is. --In 2009, he was counseling a married couple that was having problems. He always sided with the wife, blamed the husband for everything, and, basically, seemed like he was trying to BREAK THEM UP, not help them. --And it turns out that was dead on. After several months of counseling, he started having individual sessions with the wife and suggesting that she leave her husband. Then he started making sexual comments toward her. --In July of last year, he and the wife smoked reefer . . . got drunk . . . and then had sex. They kept on doing it . . . even having sex on the couch in his office. -The woman's husband eventually found out and reported Butler. He's had his license suspended while the state reviews his case. --This isn't the only time Butler's gotten into trouble. Before he started with the wife, he was having, quote, "excessive phone contact" with a 17-year-old counseling patient.--And that marijuana he smoked with the wife? Yeah, he apparently bought it from another one of his patients. (Seacoast Online) A Man Doing His Taxes Finds a $9 Million Lottery Ticket In His Folder of Receipts: Yeah . . . this isn't going to happen to you. --Last week, Irving Przyborski (--priz bore skee) of Chicago sat down to do his taxes and opened up his folder of receipts. As he sorted through them, he found a lottery ticket from the March 24, 2010 Powerball drawing in there. --He checked the numbers on the ticket and . . . yep, it was a jackpot winner. Irving had just won $9 MILLION. (--On the down side, that probably made his taxes a hell of a lot more complicated.) --It gets even crazier. The ticket was less than ONE WEEK away from hitting its one-year expiration date . . . if Irving hadn't found the ticket and claimed his prize, the money would've gone to the Illinois schools. The horror! --According to a lottery spokesman, Irving is a, quote, "quiet, laid back" guy who didn't even seem that excited about his win . . . or how close he came to missing out on his money. (CBS 2 - Chicago) Want To Buy a Wallet That's Indestructible, Fingerprint Sensitive, and Set Up With an Alarm? I suppose if you're rich enough to BUY this wallet, you're carrying enough money around to NEED this wallet. A company called Dunhill has released a new wallet that costs $825 . . . but it seems more technologically sophisticated than your CAR. --The wallet is made of carbon fiber, leather, and stainless steel . . . and is virtually indestructible. It can only be opened with your fingerprint. --And it interfaces with your cell phone via Bluetooth, so if it's ever more than 15 feet away from your body, an alarm starts going off. (Yahoo) (--You can see photos or purchase one here.) A $1,050 Luxury Swimsuit is Advertised With the Warning: Do Not Wear In Water: If you drop $1,050 on a designer, luxury bathing suit, you know you'll look good by the pool this summer. You know you'll look stylish by the pool this summer. You know other women will be jealous of you by the pool this summer. -But, for the love of God, do NOT jump in the pool this summer. --A company called Herve Leger is selling a $1,050 bathing suit . . . that's clearly for looking good ONLY. Because an ad for the suit had a disclaimer, quote, "To get the best from your Herve Leger beachwear, we advise you do not wear it in the water." --After people online started talking about that warning over the weekend, it was taken down. (Racked.com) (--Here's a photo of this not-safe-for-water suit.) A Radio Shack In Missouri is Offering a Free Gun To Anyone Who Signs Up For Dish Network: If you're frustrated with your cable provider . . . and you like to shoot things . . . you're going to want to listen to this deal from a Radio Shack in Hamilton, Missouri. --Their offer? Sign up for Dish Network's satellite service . . . and get a FREE GUN. You can either get a free Hi-Point 380 pistol or a 20-gauge shotgun. --The Radio Shack isn't stocking the guns themselves . . . they give you a voucher to a local gun store. That store performs all the necessary background checks, then gives you your brand new gun. --Steve Strand owns the Radio Shack. He says that since he started this deal he's seen his business TRIPLE. --As for how Dish Network feels about this, Strand says they were a little nervous about the promotion at first . . . but they finally agreed to it. And since it's been such a huge success, now they love it. (Missoulian) A New Study Determines That You Lost the Remote Between the Couch Cushions: You've got to love these studies that have no scientific merit but are incredibly useful for our day-to-day lives. A new study has tried to figure out where your lost remote went. And they think they've got the answer. --According to the study, there's an OVERWHELMING chance that your lost remote is . . . between the couch cushions. 49% of the time, that's where remotes in the study turned up. That makes it SIX TIMES more likely than any other place. --The second-most likely place was a tie . . . 8% of the time the remote was in the bathroom, 8% it was in a dresser drawer. 4% of the time it turned up in the refrigerator or freezer, and 2% of the time it showed up in the car. (Logitech) It's Official: More Than Half of Americans are Now On Facebook: It may feel like it's been years since Facebook overtook your life and made you a slave . . . but it's taken until now for the rest of the country to catch up. -According to a new study, as of January of 2011, the MAJORITY of Americans are now on Facebook. 51% of people over 12 now have Facebook profiles. --Three years ago, only 8% of American adults had Facebook profiles. (Edison Research) Hotdogs Might Be Healthier Than Chicken? It's a pretty basic rule of nutrition that eating chicken is good for you, and eating the fifteen different types of road kill that go into a hotdog is bad for you. Well . . . maybe, just maybe, that's not totally true. --According to a new study out of Kansas State University, on some level, hotdogs might actually be better for you than chicken.--The reason? Hotdogs tend to have almost no carcinogenic compounds called HCAs. --HCAs are found in some meats that are fried or grilled at high temperatures. If you eat too many HCAs, it's possible that you increase your risk of stomach, colon, and breast cancer. --Hotdogs have almost no HCAs. Pepperoni and deli meat are also very low. Fully cooked bacon has a few . . . and rotisserie chicken has a LOT. Most of them are concentrated in the chicken skin. --Chicken has other benefits, though, that hotdogs don't . . . like WAY more protein. --And you don't really have to worry about HCAs TOO much unless you're eating a TON of fried and rotisserie chicken . . . and possibly wrapping it in bacon. (--Plus, hotdogs contain more sodium nitrate, a preservative that's usually found in processed meat like bacon and deli meat. And consuming too much sodium nitrate can contribute to cancer. So . . . I guess there's always vegetarianism?) (MSNBC) Baseball Pitchers are More Likely To Retaliate By Hitting a Batter When It's Hot Outside: It's really a glorious era for nerds who love baseball . . . they can really find a way to make ANYTHING about baseball into a statistic these days. Here's the latest. --Researchers at Duke University have determined that, statistically, a Major League Baseball pitcher is more likely to throw at a batter when it's hot outside. --They analyzed more than 57,000 games and found that when a pitcher's teammate was hit by a pitch and it was over 90 degrees outside, there was a 27% chance that pitcher would retaliate by hitting an opponent with a pitch. --If the temperature was in the 50s, there was only a 22% chance he'd retaliate by hitting an opponent with a pitch. --The researchers say this actually can show how heat and aggression are related outside of baseball, too. --The heat made pitchers more likely to RETALIATE and get revenge when a teammate was hit. But, if their teammates weren't hit, there was no connection between the heat and the number of beanballs. --The researchers believe that shows that heat makes us more aggressive when it comes to RETALIATING . . . so if it's hot outside and someone does something to make you angry, you could be more likely to overreact. (U.S. News & World Report) MEATBALL CRIMINALS A Couple is Found Living In a Small Room Above an Elevator Shaft at a Sheraton Hotel: Hey, if you can't afford to pay rent and you decide to go the SQUATTER route, might as well pick a place that always has fluffy towels and complimentary copies of "USA Today". --In Springfield, Massachusetts, a couple was busted living in a Sheraton hotel. But not in a guest room . . . no, these two were living in a small room above the ELEVATOR SHAFT. --30-year-old Joseph DeMarco and 22-year-old Megan Disley had been living above the elevator shaft at the Sheraton for at least a week before they were caught. --They might've gotten away with it longer, except that their room didn't have a bathroom so they were doing their nasty business into different containers . . . and leaving those outside of their room. A maintenance person spotted the waste jars. --When the cops got to the room, Joseph and Megan were asleep. They were using blankets and pillows that they'd stolen from the hotel. --They were arrested and charged with breaking and entering, trespassing, larceny, possession of burglarious instruments, and carrying a dangerous weapon. (NBC 22 - Springfield) STUPID NEWS EXTRAS In Florida, a man who was accused of stabbing his girlfriend tried the old "I was cutting her a slice of pie and the knife slipped" excuse. (Full story) A Massachusetts job fair scheduled for April 6th has been canceled . . . because there aren't any jobs out there. (Full story) Not busy on Sunday, June 19th? Head to Wales and participate in an attempt to break the world record for the most people SKINNY DIPPING. The current record is only 250 people. (Full story) Take this personality quiz and find out if YOU'RE GONNA DIE. The quiz is based on a connection between how conscientious you are and how long you're probably going to last. (Full story) Sad story here. A 61-year-old man tried to perform CPR on his 59-year-old wife after she had a heart attack . . . and he died in the process. She died as well. Ouch. (Full story) NAZZY’S VIDEOS OF THE DAY #1.) A New Tsunami Video Was Posted on YouTube That Shows an Entire City in Japan Being Washed Away: A new video of the tsunami in Japan was posted on YouTube on Friday, and it already has a million views. This one shows the wave completely overwhelming the port city of Kesennuma, which was almost totally destroyed. --It starts with dozens of cars being washed away, then a whole building goes, and by the end there's almost nothing left but water. --It was shot from the roof of a building right on the shore, and at the beginning it looks like the people filming it are definitely high enough to be safe. But by the end, it looks like they could almost reach down and touch the water. (--Search for "Kesennuma Tsunami Video." The one-story building with a green roof starts being swept away around 2:10.) #2.) Check Out a Lame Family Band From the '80s Performing a Song Called "I Ain't Gonna Pee-Pee My Bed Tonight": A ridiculous video of a band called THE KELLY FAMILY is flying around the Internet right now. The Kelly Family was a multigenerational band that was popular in Europe in the '80s and '90s. And like all PARTRIDGE FAMILY knock-offs, they were totally lame. --In the video, a little kid shows off some horrible ELVIS-style dance movies while he and his family perform an equally awful song called "I Ain't Gonna Pee-Pee My Bed Tonight". The Six Worst Foods You Can Eat: Half of the food sold at grocery stores is bad for you, but "Reader's Digest" boiled it down to a list of the absolute worst foods you can eat. Here are the top six foods you should avoid. #1.) Processed Meat. It's usually high in salt, fat, and cholesterol. And according to the American Institute for Cancer Research, meat that's smoked, cured, preserved in salt, or preserved with chemicals increases your risk for colon cancer. #2.) Frozen Dinners. The portions might be small, but they're loaded with calories. And even though the diet versions are low-fat, they're heavily processed and usually high in salt. #3.) Doughnuts. They're basically just refined flour and sugar. And one doughnut can have 300 empty calories and 20 grams of fat, including trans fat. #4.) Potato Chips. Obviously, you'll gain weight if you eat too many. But they also contain the same carcinogen that found in French fries called acrylamide (--pronounced ah-KRILL-uh-mide). --So in other words, potato chips can make you fat AND give you cancer. #5.) Foods Labeled "Low-Fat" and "Fat Free". There's a low-fat version of almost everything now. But when you get rid of the fat, you lose a lot of the flavor. --So to compensate, food companies add more sugar and salt, and the end product is usually just as bad for you as the normal version. #6.) Soda. It's not really a "food", but it's so bad for you it deserves a spot on the list. According to a recent study, drinking as few as two sugary soft drinks per week doubles your risk of developing pancreatic cancer. --And a separate study showed that drinking DIET soda increases your risk of suffering a heart attack or a stroke by as much as 61%. (Reader's Digest)